Hi I'm a stay-at-home father in the United States and this topic really hit home and as a stay-at-home dad of two daughters and only one car currently no reliable public transportation where I live I don't have any one to turn to and when I do participate in things that are primarily dominated by stay-at-home moms I'm usually looked at as a loser lowlife a creep if I try to talk to other men about it they look at me with great to distane and my children have to suffer for it it sucks being a stay-at-home dad in the United States
Bro this is me!!! Dude it's fucking awful! I'm super depressed over it as of lately. Been drinking more than usual it sucks so bad bro. Im in CA, idk where you at. But hell man we all have to reach out to eachother . Like were tf are our support groups, you know...
@@dank9288639 2 years now as a stay at home dad. in Los Angeles. definately a challenge. how do you keep associating with your kid in a healthy way even when your feeling isolated
I'm a stay at home dad. 7 years away from the work force. It is a weird scene. I didn't have many SAHD friends but I had a lot mom friends. I'm pretty outgoing though. You got to make those phone calls and put stuff on the calendar. Just playdates. Once the kids are playing conversation happens. A lot of times when I get to know these women it will occur to me that my wife would like this person a lot and I get them together. I get to meet their husbands and next thing you know youre going camping. Having kids has enriched me and my wife's social network a lot. But you got to hit those story hours, get those digits, make the calls, set the dates, and be available to help with each other's childcare. Best 7 years of my life. Now I get to help people find homes and sell homes. It's all about helping others and being open to help.
Omg 7 years theres no fucking way my husband would stay at home while i work hell no hes gonna work he does not have respect for you type of men he says your lazy men that dont have a backbone and does women work and yall not real men i think 7 years for a man out of work is lazy unless you cant afford childcare u need to provide for your wife and kids
I'm a new stay at home dad and great with the kids and thought I would kill it but turns out I'm not doing any better than mom. I feel so defeated! Thank you!
Hi John, this is an interesting topic. One I suspect many men preparing to be or about to become "stay at home dads" are blissfully unaware of. One further evolution of this issue is what happens when your kids start attending school. For me, the isolation got much worse after that.
You are absolutely right Henry. My children are now both at school and while I have filled my ti,e with work projects, it is very isolating, I guess because your day revolves around the school run. You do have more freedoms when looking after tiny people and that can make it less isolating. Perhaps I'll shoot a follow up.
john adams I understood every single word you said in this video. Let me know if I can contribute to the dialogue. I’m 35, have been at home for 5 years, and we’re about to have our 3rd child.
I'm working on being a software engineer, have a stay at home dad in the process. It's a though experience but rewarding. It's a lot of snickering neighbors, but this is the process we chose.
Good stuff John. I found it interesting about tapping into a Dad network of friends to find a babysitter. It would be interesting to hear how many Mum's would be OK with their partners male friend that they don't know looking after the kids, compared to how many Dad's wouldn't mind their kids going to their wife's female friends? - I'm a SAHD and fortunately I'm pretty outgoing and also don't mind days alone with the kids. I can definitely see how this is an issue for so many parents out there though. Socialising is a very complex game.
Yeah, that is a great point re mum's friend and dad's friends and whether mums would be happy with a guy looking after their kids. In fairness I think some would encourage it while others would freak. Such a complicated worked we live in hey??
I'll be honest I still struggle letting anyone look after my son, apart from his mum. Both of my sisters are nurses and I still get a little jittery leaving him for an hour or two with them!
Interesting video mate and some very valid points. As a fellow SAHD, I sometimes feel a little isolated and lonely due to not really having any other SAHDs around. As you say, it's a little more difficult to be a bloke and break into the SAHM circles. I too worry a bit about the impact this has on the little one, e.g. should she be socialising more with other toddlers. Sorry for the link drop, but I penned my thoughts on the lonely life of a stay-at-home parent the other day thedadventurer.com/birth/lonely-life-stay-at-home-parent/
+The DADventurer - UK Dad Blogger Thanks Dave. I have read your post and it rings true to me! What a coincidence we covered the same issue in the same week. Anyway, in my experience it gets easy with time.
I had my first child at 15 one yr and 27 days later I had my twin daughters. Fuvee years later my wife wanted to work. So I pull the stay at home dad. I have gained almost 60 lbs in a deep depression. I think the father at home is best for trade off friends.
I feel you my friend. I’m 35 and I’ve been at home for 5yrs. After going through basically what you described (including therapy) it was only after I decided to rekindle my relationship with my father that my marriage became better than ever. I decided to throw aside and burn any pride and ego that had kept us apart. I saw a a massive weight lift off his shoulders after I let him know that he’s my hero.
Hi! I'm a producer at ATTN:. We're working on a video about stay at home dads. We'd love to use some of your footage in this video. We'd of course give credit. You can email me at lguthmann@attn.com for more details. Thanks!
Nothing is wrong to take care of your kids. But are you not ashamed to live with your wife's income? What kind of shameless man you are? Are you even a man?
![FNAF vs TF2 - Episode 2 [SFM]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/z5b3V2-VLb0/mqdefault.jpg)
Hi I'm a stay-at-home father in the United States and this topic really hit home and as a stay-at-home dad of two daughters and only one car currently no reliable public transportation where I live I don't have any one to turn to and when I do participate in things that are primarily dominated by stay-at-home moms I'm usually looked at as a loser lowlife a creep if I try to talk to other men about it they look at me with great to distane and my children have to suffer for it it sucks being a stay-at-home dad in the United States
Bro this is me!!! Dude it's fucking awful! I'm super depressed over it as of lately. Been drinking more than usual it sucks so bad bro. Im in CA, idk where you at. But hell man we all have to reach out to eachother . Like were tf are our support groups, you know...
@@dank9288639 2 years now as a stay at home dad. in Los Angeles. definately a challenge. how do you keep associating with your kid in a healthy way even when your feeling isolated
I'm a stay at home dad. 7 years away from the work force. It is a weird scene. I didn't have many SAHD friends but I had a lot mom friends. I'm pretty outgoing though. You got to make those phone calls and put stuff on the calendar. Just playdates. Once the kids are playing conversation happens. A lot of times when I get to know these women it will occur to me that my wife would like this person a lot and I get them together. I get to meet their husbands and next thing you know youre going camping. Having kids has enriched me and my wife's social network a lot. But you got to hit those story hours, get those digits, make the calls, set the dates, and be available to help with each other's childcare. Best 7 years of my life. Now I get to help people find homes and sell homes. It's all about helping others and being open to help.
Omg 7 years theres no fucking way my husband would stay at home while i work hell no hes gonna work he does not have respect for you type of men he says your lazy men that dont have a backbone and does women work and yall not real men i think 7 years for a man out of work is lazy unless you cant afford childcare u need to provide for your wife and kids
@@tammykirk1730 wtf... is it fine if a woman was 7yrs stay at home mother to you?
@@tammykirk1730 - What is your IQ?
I'm a new stay at home dad and great with the kids and thought I would kill it but turns out I'm not doing any better than mom. I feel so defeated! Thank you!
I'm. A stay at home dad, I feel like I'm failing, alone, depressed and I don't know how to fix it
I'm sorry you feel that way. I'm sure you aren't failing. All parents have moments of doubt. I wish you the very best.
i feel the same way bro, from accross the pond in Cali
You and me both, the first time in my life im lost at 36
Hi John, this is an interesting topic. One I suspect many men preparing to be or about to become "stay at home dads" are blissfully unaware of. One further evolution of this issue is what happens when your kids start attending school. For me, the isolation got much worse after that.
You are absolutely right Henry. My children are now both at school and while I have filled my ti,e with work projects, it is very isolating, I guess because your day revolves around the school run. You do have more freedoms when looking after tiny people and that can make it less isolating. Perhaps I'll shoot a follow up.
john adams I understood every single word you said in this video. Let me know if I can contribute to the dialogue. I’m 35, have been at home for 5 years, and we’re about to have our 3rd child.
I'm working on being a software engineer, have a stay at home dad in the process. It's a though experience but rewarding. It's a lot of snickering neighbors, but this is the process we chose.
Good stuff John. I found it interesting about tapping into a Dad network of friends to find a babysitter. It would be interesting to hear how many Mum's would be OK with their partners male friend that they don't know looking after the kids, compared to how many Dad's wouldn't mind their kids going to their wife's female friends? - I'm a SAHD and fortunately I'm pretty outgoing and also don't mind days alone with the kids. I can definitely see how this is an issue for so many parents out there though. Socialising is a very complex game.
Yeah, that is a great point re mum's friend and dad's friends and whether mums would be happy with a guy looking after their kids. In fairness I think some would encourage it while others would freak. Such a complicated worked we live in hey??
I'll be honest I still struggle letting anyone look after my son, apart from his mum. Both of my sisters are nurses and I still get a little jittery leaving him for an hour or two with them!
Interesting video mate and some very valid points. As a fellow SAHD, I sometimes feel a little isolated and lonely due to not really having any other SAHDs around. As you say, it's a little more difficult to be a bloke and break into the SAHM circles. I too worry a bit about the impact this has on the little one, e.g. should she be socialising more with other toddlers. Sorry for the link drop, but I penned my thoughts on the lonely life of a stay-at-home parent the other day thedadventurer.com/birth/lonely-life-stay-at-home-parent/
+The DADventurer - UK Dad Blogger Thanks Dave. I have read your post and it rings true to me! What a coincidence we covered the same issue in the same week. Anyway, in my experience it gets easy with time.
I had my first child at 15 one yr and 27 days later I had my twin daughters. Fuvee years later my wife wanted to work. So I pull the stay at home dad. I have gained almost 60 lbs in a deep depression. I think the father at home is best for trade off friends.
As a side note I daughters have changed my RUclips name to one of theirs hense the Hailey name
I feel you my friend. I’m 35 and I’ve been at home for 5yrs. After going through basically what you described (including therapy) it was only after I decided to rekindle my relationship with my father that my marriage became better than ever. I decided to throw aside and burn any pride and ego that had kept us apart. I saw a a massive weight lift off his shoulders after I let him know that he’s my hero.
Hi! I'm a producer at ATTN:. We're working on a video about stay at home dads. We'd love to use some of your footage in this video. We'd of course give credit. You can email me at lguthmann@attn.com for more details. Thanks!
Hi Laurie - emailing you now.
Laurie Guthmann I’m a stay at home father. Going on 5 years and we’re having our 3rd child. Let me know if I can contribute. God bless.
Nothing is wrong to take care of your kids. But are you not ashamed to live with your wife's income? What kind of shameless man you are? Are you even a man?