I (as an Australian) showed this video to my wife (an immigrant to Australia who's been here for a few years) and she says "Noone ever talks about the giant cockroaches!"
I love how he wasn't ok with drop bears but was fine with koalas *for those who aren't aware, drop bears is another name for koalas. The joke goes that they kill all these tourists which is actually false😂
@@sarahh1007 There’s always one special kid in the room isn’t there. Thank you for taking the time to explain the joke to everyone, I’m not sure how it could have possibly survived this many generations without your input on RUclips. smh
@@picsi-software i think thats true with many animals, thats how we got an army of 15 hedgehogs invading our yard every summer. had to put up planks to block the path to our table, but they climbed over and found other ways! they do just harmlessly bump into your shoes, and make snorting sounds, but can never go barefoot again!
Don't forget when Therapy tried to keep Jonathan away and make Ophthalmology do his own notes and paperwork. He looked like he was about to have a stroke.
As an Australian, I gladly welcome Jonathan to Australia. ...can we keep him? I will say that the stinging trees are real and dangerous so be careful out in the bush if you're coming down to visit :)
@@DarkInos The spiders aren't as bad as their reputation but there's the odd dangerous one. The magpies are completely true though, and particularly relevant here since they've famously taken out peoples' eyes before. And don't forget the snakes - they don't have high body counts but many of the world's most venomous snakes live in Australia.
@@DarkInos Most Aus animals have poor reputations internationally because tourists don't leave them alone (hence plenty of bad stories - we also do love to screw with a tourist though, so...). Leave them alone, and they'll leave you alone. Most animals if given the choice will always chose to stay away. However, if they don't think you'll stay away - they WILL secure their safety. Spiders if you're not sticking your hand in places you can't see, you'll be fine [basically be aware of dark nicely sheltered places, including spider-accessible boots, doonas, toilets and similar]. Again - won't attack unless you do something stupid first. E: Glaumcomflecken did forget to add that Koalas will think you're a tree, so .... maybe not so cuddly (for you). But again, if one /actually/ thinks you're a tree, you're probably well into places you shouldn't be.
@@DarkInos Fun fact there have been no deaths by spiders here since 1979. So they haven't been a threat to anyone for almost 50 years. I did see one as big as my hand just this evening in my kitchen though 😂 he came in trying to get out of the rain, but I actually like them because they eat the much more annoying insects, so I never kill them, just calmly move the big ones outside when I see them. And sharks aren't a big deal, just don't surf at dusk and dawn and you're good, and they can be fun to swim with. The magpies will get you, though. Rotten buggers always swoop me and always seem to nest in thoroughfares on the way to any school or university me or my family have attended. Also didn't mention the jellyfish. Those are the WORST. Gotta swim in huge jellfish nets on the beach to avoid them and they kill roughly a dozen people every decade or so.
... the price of healthcare that is provided in the public system if you have a medicare card. That means most outpatient and allied health things have limited coverage. Whilst it does help, it doesn't cover everything - mental health is ten sessions (recommendations tend to be 18-20 for the common therapies) and GP visits often have large copayments now due to the medicare rebate freeze
@@Vishnu-Byup...they also picked up whatever deadly animals they found along the way to the australia and dropped it there with the criminals... its a miracle some of them humans actually survive
And yet, we have all the stupid peeps at the beach wearing nexr to nothing saying "I don't believe in sunscreen because I want to tan" 😂 I wish they were just tourist, but I've been regularly made fun of for my shoulder-covering, high-necked, regular sunscreen using ways
You haven't really experienced Australia until you've been zooming down the highway, folded down the visor because there's sun in your eyes and had a huntsman fall on you. Always check for huntsmen before driving.
I keep my visor permanently down for this very reason. Didn't think about the front door though. Opened that yesterday and a huntsman fell down on me. We seemed to be equally stunned by that turn of events.
@@cleementine Well yeah, so do tarantulas. Doesn't bother me as long as they don't kill you. If they're big and harmless, that's actually funnier to me.
A) Drop bears - Classic B) You forgot about Funnel-web, Mouse-trap and Redback Spiders, the eastern brown snake, bluebottles, box jellyfish and irikanji, etc. C) The sun is crazy hot; but, the rain is much worse. D) The glare will burn out your retinas. E) The magpies are far worse than anything else. F) You're trusty stead, Jonathan, might get poached by an Australian ophthalmologist - American's can't resist our accents; and, G) You'll have the best time over here. Have fun mate
Irikanji jellyfish is about the size of your thumbnail and is describe as being comparable in pain to child birth, and can lead to death. The gympie-gympie he mentioned is so painful people can be tied down to their hospital bed so they don't rip their own skin off and the pain can linger for MONTHS.
I am Australian from Queensland, my in laws are from Finland so we all went to the rainforest for some R&R. We saw some of these stinging trees, the Gympie Gympie, and my father in law leaned in very close to try and take a close up photo and I dived to stop him... I thought he was going to touch it. Omg that was so stressful 😂 If Johnathan is reading, if you are heading to Australia and check out Queensland, I suggest going to Springbrook. There is a waterfall which runs through a cave and at night there are glow worms all through the area and in the roof of the cave. It is magical! It's like looking at the stars. There are also gorgeous green tree frogs there too. It's a very nice place to visit and the air BNBs there are also quite nice to stay in. And better still, it's far away from the Emus... Who are definitely benevolent overlords and I really love that they are running the country and they are just great... So great! God save the Emus!
When you mentioned he was leaning towards the Gympie Gympie, I was genuinely scared to keep reading because I imagined the next words being "and he slipped" or "and then the wind picked up"
As an Australian living in the US I can confirm most of that is suuuuper unlikely to happen. (Except the sun thing, it’s definitely challenging us to kill it). You left out the part where snakes that are not classified as swimmers or known to swim may randomly swim up to you on the beach. I had that happen once with a brown snake. In all fairness, it was at a nude beach, so I was really pushing my luck from the start.
@@weenacfeegle3086 Also gotta be careful of stones, because they might not be stones, they might be stonefish. And they’re quite sensationally venomous.
Google is on a roll...! I was looking up just how big huntsman spiders get in Australia... then something about the spider rain... then the blue-ringed octopus... and finally as I was typing out to search "do koalas..." Google completed the query by suggesting "have chlamydia"? Another awesome and informative skit, Dr. G!
That was hilarious. As a kiwi who lived in Australia l can confirm all of those things exist, well nearly all. Also, you forgot the venomous caterpillars. There's a very good reason the second official language of Australia is screaming! If any one is wondering why Australian and New Zealand magpies are so vicious it's because they're Gymnorhina tibicen a different species to the European ones. Homesick colonisers thought they looked similar enough.
As an aussie optom I also wholeheartedly welcome Jonathon to our shores, and don't worry about the water death traps, just stay between the flags and you'll be fine.... The other stuff on the other hand, you're on your own for.
As an Australian I didn't realize my life was so dangerous. How have I survived so long... But really, I have never met a spider that is the size of a small dog. Sydney has the most poisonous spider, but spiders just want to get away from you, you're more likely to get into a boxing match with a kangaroo that you lose to, rather than get killed by a spider. I know because both my brothers have gotten kicked by kangaroos, but I've never met anyone that died or even was severely injured by a spider. Watch out for the snakes though 😅
You sound young. Young enough that spider antivenom is common enough that you don't really have to worry. Wasn't so long ago that wasn't the case. Thanks, medicine!
@@NeSeeger then again, you get kicked by a horse for standing behind them. But you get kicked by a kangaroo standing in front of them... I've seen videos of them coming to people's yards, knocking on their front doors and all...
So... is now a bad time to mention they discovered a new species of trapdoor spider? they're like normal spiders but have learned to employ guerrilla tactics by creating camouflaged hinged cover for their burrows that they can leap out of and drag prey back into.
@@susie9893 I mean a flaw in language or comprehension rather than in their information. Unintended implication or interpretation- "this new species is the only trapdoor spider that uses trapdoors"
I'm surprised you didn't bring up blue bottle season. It's the period in summer where blue bottle jellyfish (aka Portuguese Man O' War jellyfish) are so common in the ocean that they wash up on shore in droves. They're almost invisible in the water and they have stingers that will give you immensely painful stings. Sometimes lifeguards will close down entire beaches if the jellyfish swarms are too big.
I moved to Brisbane from the US a year and a half ago for med school here. All the students at UQ MD constantly quote your videos. If you keep to the cities, the most you have to worry about is the magpies and dropbears. Also hope you don’t mind lots and lots of lizards.
Australian here! I recently went overseas and got an American with the Drop Bears joke 😁 Koalas are adorable? Have you heard one growl??!! 😳 I love your videos 🇦🇺
Lots of tourists who come to Brisbane Queensland go to Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary to cuddle/hold one. Few get scared when the males start their mating call lol
Australian, I laughed so hard about the stinging nettles/trees. Will never forget the first time I walked into one as a kid while trying to avoid a whole lot of wait-a-while/lawyer cane plants 😂 In summer people wear helmets with plastic spike things on them in a (mostly ineffective) bid to deter the magpie and plover armageddon. If the sun, snakes, spiders or sea life don't get us, the birds will.
"Dont forget about the sun. Yeah for some reason it has a grudge against Austrailia and tries to incinerate everything." the delivery on that line sent me over the edge. the moment he said "infectious disease" i knew the chlamydia line was coming lmao
As a recent exchange student to Australia (yay Perth!) this is the same sort of talk I got before I left... and after I arrived, once everyone figured out I was new here. The sun definitely wants to kill everything, and boy howdy does the environment retaliate!
I thought you'd mention how the Magpies definitely target the eyes. Out of all the things mentioned I'm pretty sure the Magpies and the (mostly) harmless huntsman are the only ones I've actually had to deal with out here so you'll be fine.
its funny you should mention our swooping magpies, because the peewee (magpie-lark) while smaller and technically less aggressive than the Australian magpie has a habit of swooping from both above and below and going straight for the eyes
omg i can't wait for you to come to australia!!! I find it inexplicably hilarious that it's under the banner of an infectious disease conference though. And it's on aprils fools. But so excited!!
Yay if your in Brisbane, I highly recommend you take a day-trip to Stradbroke Island. You don't even need to drive, you catch the train to the ferry stop, get the ferry, and then use the bus that circles the island to get around. Lots of Kangaroos and dramatic walks along the cliffs and beaches.
Well congratulations you almost made me laugh myself into an asthma attack! That was amazing. Thank you for getting me to laugh for the first time in a week I'm in the hospital with pneumonia. Jonathan is everything
There have only been 13 funnel Web deaths and a tiny handful, 2 or 3 red back deaths confirmed ever in Australia. Our venomous spiders aren't that bad. Huntsman spider are huge, scurry like gigantic 8 legged horses but are completely 100% harmless. Actually they keep down the numbers of humongous cockroaches that want to dwell in your house.
You might want to come quick if you want to see koalas… Also, for all the deadly animals that live here, we do have some truly beautiful landscapes. I recently went for a road trip up the Kidman Way, and there was some lovely scenery. It did let me experience the most bugs I’ve ever seen in my life though. There were literal mounds of digi bugs every morning when I woke up, and walking at night genuinely scared the shit out of me as they pushed each other into and under my shoes.
I can only nod in Australian, but I promise you and Jonathan it's a friendly nod, a nod of greeting! Have an awesome time, I hope you get to meet some of our lovely critters in a safe environment!
One of the best yet!! And some helpful hints from Tourism Australia: .(things) "that bite and sting - the rule of thumb is you have about 20 to 30 minutes until you will be hallucinating, having difficulty breathing and your heart may have stopped (venom often causes blood clotting)." Hmmmmm, the same signs as when I did my first hour of MED3 neurosurgery rotation!!! Coincidence? I think not!
You forgot about the snakes. And the funnel web spiders. And the birds and marsupials that can and will disembowel a human. Oh, and koalas? Will do you serious damage if you piss them off. Enjoy Australia! Don't worry about the magpies going for your eyes. They hardly ever do that... outside of nesting season, that is. Enjoy the sunshine! When it's not flooding, that is... 😂
After reading the first couple of hundred comments, I'm sure Jonathan will be prepared for every death defying action necessary for a safe and relaxing trip! 👍
I see, so you only plan to go to East Australia :).. you should try West Australia - here basically all the plants are toxic, but we do have nicer weather :)
I live near where the blue-ring octopuses live, but I have centipedes, scorpions and mouse spiders in my back yard. Magpies and ravens are regular visitors - daily, actually - as well as a whole host of other native birds (including kookaburras), but the hawks and eagles usually only fly overhead… then there are the bin-chickens, aka ibises… won’t even blink/budge at my Dobermann! Despite all the critters mentioned (and the ones I haven’t) it’s a beautiful patch of Earth. Don’t go to any of the Eastern states… it’s like a smaller version of where you come from. Go to Perth… the most isolated capital city in the world. Mellow and safe, and a sight for sore eyes, which I’m sure you’d appreciate 😉🙏🏼❤️
@@rosmarbal, you can keep the Eastern side, and I’ll just have Perth, thanks. I’ve seen what the East has to offer, and you’re more than welcome to keep it!🤣
@@susie9893, even so, there aren’t enough birds to take care of the insects and arachnids. Besides, there are NO predators for Portuguese millipedes; they are chock-full of cyanide (not very appetising… and I’m actually being serious here lol)!
@@lindajohnson9282 yeah my folks have bull ants. Extremely difficult to control (unless you wanna poison your land into the bargain - and even then....)
😅 Excellent video, as usual. Poor other practices don't get a vacation, that would go further to reduce burn out than that retreat, lol. Loved the drop bears part! ❤
Hey, I absolutely love every single one of your videos! Do you think you could add a paramedic character, as we interact with almost all the different doctor characters you do! I’d be curious to know what doctors actually think about us after we drop them off a patient. I’m sure it would all make for more great humour!
These are all the reasons Australians have free health care 😂 Safe travels, I can definitely reassure you Australia is absolutely beautiful and you likely won't see any of the dangers...just don't leave the house without SPF50.
At first I was like "wtf is a stinging tree, what is wrong with you Australia", but then I remembered that annual nettle exists and it's a very common plant where I live. And it stings really bad too
This is a tree not a nettle. It is the most dangerous stinging tree in the world and has been known to cause irritation for a year in some cases. Some people have killed themselves to stop the pain. Look up the Gympie Gympie.
Honestly the one thing preventing me from visiting Australia is how terrified I get of our little house spiders in America. I am not sure I could deal with the ones in Australia.
I'm Australian and far more bothered by creepy crawlies in my house than outdoors. If you're not planning to go hiking on rarely used trails then you're unlikely to have any issues at all. On the other hand I'd be terrified to go camping in America cos you have bears and wild dogs and giant cats. We don't have any large predators unless you count sharks, but there's sharks in the US too.
I (as an Australian) showed this video to my wife (an immigrant to Australia who's been here for a few years) and she says "Noone ever talks about the giant cockroaches!"
😮🤢
Yea but theyre harmless arent they?
But if your roomie is a gross mofo, they might end up in your toaster.
Which is weird considering you're surrounded by them at all times.
or the tiger slugs, or the possums, march flies or the mites...
The mosquitoes that can carry you away, or the wall of bugs you have to drive through at twilight every night on the way home from work.
As soon as infectious disease mentioned koalas I knew where the joke was going, and it was performed excellently.
I love how he wasn't ok with drop bears but was fine with koalas
*for those who aren't aware, drop bears is another name for koalas. The joke goes that they kill all these tourists which is actually false😂
I guess you could say it was a...
Koalaity joke. :D
@@sarahh1007 I thought they were drop bears but wasn’t sure, thanks lol
@@ItBePatYo Shut up. 😂😂😂😂👌🏾👌🏾
@@sarahh1007 There’s always one special kid in the room isn’t there. Thank you for taking the time to explain the joke to everyone, I’m not sure how it could have possibly survived this many generations without your input on RUclips. smh
Jonathan’s Australian accent is impeccable
I thought it could use some work. A bit too precise to be considered authentic
🕷️🕷️🕷️
😎☂️
As an Australian, it was very clear and understandable. Tourists should take note.
I like to think the subtext is that all the other doctors dont want opth to be able to enjoy his vacation while they have the wellness retreat.
Yep. Always ready to ruin someone else's vacation.'
🎯
I do think the saaaaame!!!
I thought they were going easy on ophthalmology, they didn't mention the really scary stuff
I honestly expected the punchline to be that he'd rather go to the wellness retreat
If you make friends with magpies before breeding season, they will mostly ignore you, so make sure you help out your local bird friends!
but don't feed them, they will never let you have a BBQ again, singing to them seems to be fine though :)
@@picsi-software i think thats true with many animals, thats how we got an army of 15 hedgehogs invading our yard every summer. had to put up planks to block the path to our table, but they climbed over and found other ways! they do just harmlessly bump into your shoes, and make snorting sounds, but can never go barefoot again!
What if I act as a wingman for my winged bros?
@@terry_the_terrible no they will attack you. When they are mating stay in the friendzone
Those flying maniacs have a memory of an elephant.
That rare occasion when you give the opthalmologist stress. Now he can fit in with the rest of the guys
Jonathan is unflappable!
Don't forget when Therapy tried to keep Jonathan away and make Ophthalmology do his own notes and paperwork. He looked like he was about to have a stroke.
@@JarrodFrates ahh yes I do recall. That's why I said that rare occasion. Good memory my friend 👍
Being able to stress out the opthalmologist is more effective than any wellness retreat 😂
It doubles as a group bonding exercise.
As an Australian, I gladly welcome Jonathan to Australia.
...can we keep him?
I will say that the stinging trees are real and dangerous so be careful out in the bush if you're coming down to visit :)
Wait.. so only the trees are dangerous? Spiders and such are fine? :D
don't worry I won't go to Australia simply because I love my normal difficulty life I don't want to a place where it's in hardcore (jk btw)
@@DarkInos The spiders aren't as bad as their reputation but there's the odd dangerous one. The magpies are completely true though, and particularly relevant here since they've famously taken out peoples' eyes before. And don't forget the snakes - they don't have high body counts but many of the world's most venomous snakes live in Australia.
@@DarkInos Most Aus animals have poor reputations internationally because tourists don't leave them alone (hence plenty of bad stories - we also do love to screw with a tourist though, so...). Leave them alone, and they'll leave you alone. Most animals if given the choice will always chose to stay away. However, if they don't think you'll stay away - they WILL secure their safety. Spiders if you're not sticking your hand in places you can't see, you'll be fine [basically be aware of dark nicely sheltered places, including spider-accessible boots, doonas, toilets and similar]. Again - won't attack unless you do something stupid first.
E: Glaumcomflecken did forget to add that Koalas will think you're a tree, so .... maybe not so cuddly (for you). But again, if one /actually/ thinks you're a tree, you're probably well into places you shouldn't be.
@@DarkInos Fun fact there have been no deaths by spiders here since 1979. So they haven't been a threat to anyone for almost 50 years. I did see one as big as my hand just this evening in my kitchen though 😂 he came in trying to get out of the rain, but I actually like them because they eat the much more annoying insects, so I never kill them, just calmly move the big ones outside when I see them. And sharks aren't a big deal, just don't surf at dusk and dawn and you're good, and they can be fun to swim with.
The magpies will get you, though. Rotten buggers always swoop me and always seem to nest in thoroughfares on the way to any school or university me or my family have attended. Also didn't mention the jellyfish. Those are the WORST. Gotta swim in huge jellfish nets on the beach to avoid them and they kill roughly a dozen people every decade or so.
As an Australian, I must say that this vid is highly accurate especially the drop bears (although not as deadly as the magpies)
Are the trees real?
@B Kane
Yes, they're called gympie-gympie if you want to look them up
@@bkane573 100% real and terrifying
I second the magpies! They always choose to camp frequented thoroughfares to schools and shop too!
@@bkane573 Yes
“Waste of time I mean wellness retreat” without any pauses or hesitation… 😂
Greetings from Australia.
One thing here that won't try to kill you is... The price of healthcare ;)
👍👍👍👍
Although let's hope it stays that way!!
touche
... the price of healthcare that is provided in the public system if you have a medicare card. That means most outpatient and allied health things have limited coverage. Whilst it does help, it doesn't cover everything - mental health is ten sessions (recommendations tend to be 18-20 for the common therapies) and GP visits often have large copayments now due to the medicare rebate freeze
Unless you're in the bush. Granted, if you survive a certain amount of time out there nothing can kill you short of a nuclear bomb.
This is not going to age well 😔
Thanks for this humbling reminder; it's a miracle that I've managed to survive 30 years on this death-trap of an island.
the tiniest continent or the king (queen?) of islands!
30 years? so you must be one of the elders then.
It's why we have universal health care. Without it, humans would go extinct on this continent.
'Death-trap of an island'...?
Seems about right....
No wonder british used it as a land to incarcerate criminals back then.
@@Vishnu-Byup...they also picked up whatever deadly animals they found along the way to the australia and dropped it there with the criminals...
its a miracle some of them humans actually survive
Legend has it that magpies bare the souls of neurosurgeons who passed on without getting to do that final craniectomy
AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!
Jonathan: *nod nod nod*
Lmaoooo
😂
Perfectly Australian!
Underrated joke!
Jonathan looks prepared. Maybe he can go by himself on a well deserved vacation
But that would mean betrayal
Johnathon would come back from vacation to Eye Bro looking like he spent the week in Family Practice or Primary Care
A trip by Jonathan on his own? Can only be the Jonathan resistance co-ordination conference!
I love how after emergency medicine started talking everyone collectively decided to mess with him
Even Johnathan is going along with it.
The Ophthalmologist was so worried about Australia that he forgot his rivalry with the Dermatologist for a second 😅
Yeah in Australia dermatology is a highly respected field. Our most common cancer is melanoma
after lung cancer that is
And yet, we have all the stupid peeps at the beach wearing nexr to nothing saying "I don't believe in sunscreen because I want to tan" 😂 I wish they were just tourist, but I've been regularly made fun of for my shoulder-covering, high-necked, regular sunscreen using ways
Skin cancer but apart from that enjoy Australia as I live in Australia
Highly respected... The cartel, which puts Escobar to shame, is respected with its 6-12 month waitlist...
Granted, that's actually the most common cancer worldwide. Since your skin is your largest organ and all
You haven't really experienced Australia until you've been zooming down the highway, folded down the visor because there's sun in your eyes and had a huntsman fall on you.
Always check for huntsmen before driving.
I keep my visor permanently down for this very reason.
Didn't think about the front door though. Opened that yesterday and a huntsman fell down on me. We seemed to be equally stunned by that turn of events.
Good God! 😱😱😱
Eh, they seem fine. Huntsmen aren't venomous, just big. Now the tiny redback spiders who like to hide in places like your shoes, THAT worries me.
@@slook7094 They have FUR!
😦
@@cleementine Well yeah, so do tarantulas. Doesn't bother me as long as they don't kill you. If they're big and harmless, that's actually funnier to me.
The neurologist saying that with a smile on his face just cracks me up, lol.
That was a smile? I thought it was just his usual condescending sneer. Hmm. Same thing? 🤔😂
@@thenadie8 For him yes surely!😂😂
A) Drop bears - Classic
B) You forgot about Funnel-web, Mouse-trap and Redback Spiders, the eastern brown snake, bluebottles, box jellyfish and irikanji, etc.
C) The sun is crazy hot; but, the rain is much worse.
D) The glare will burn out your retinas.
E) The magpies are far worse than anything else.
F) You're trusty stead, Jonathan, might get poached by an Australian ophthalmologist - American's can't resist our accents; and,
G) You'll have the best time over here. Have fun mate
Irikanji jellyfish is about the size of your thumbnail and is describe as being comparable in pain to child birth, and can lead to death. The gympie-gympie he mentioned is so painful people can be tied down to their hospital bed so they don't rip their own skin off and the pain can linger for MONTHS.
Redbacks actually exist in the USA. Called black widows but same spider I believe
Stonefish are great
@@dmystermillion2351 closely related but not the same. Red backs are a little more potent on average.
Australian accent is chef’s kiss! 💗
😂😂😂 I’m an Aussie, and wholeheartedly welcome Jonathan and his Opthalmologist to our shores. Thanks for the great rap! 🤣🤣🤣
I am Australian from Queensland, my in laws are from Finland so we all went to the rainforest for some R&R. We saw some of these stinging trees, the Gympie Gympie, and my father in law leaned in very close to try and take a close up photo and I dived to stop him... I thought he was going to touch it. Omg that was so stressful 😂
If Johnathan is reading, if you are heading to Australia and check out Queensland, I suggest going to Springbrook. There is a waterfall which runs through a cave and at night there are glow worms all through the area and in the roof of the cave. It is magical! It's like looking at the stars. There are also gorgeous green tree frogs there too. It's a very nice place to visit and the air BNBs there are also quite nice to stay in.
And better still, it's far away from the Emus... Who are definitely benevolent overlords and I really love that they are running the country and they are just great... So great! God save the Emus!
So what you're saying is: there's an Emu with sharp talons right next to your computer, giving you meaningful stares.
When you mentioned he was leaning towards the Gympie Gympie, I was genuinely scared to keep reading because I imagined the next words being "and he slipped" or "and then the wind picked up"
Clearly someone learned their lesson from the last failed revolt against the glorious emu overlords.
@@Michael-bb1cw they truly are the greatest of the dinosaurs
As an Australian pharmacist let me just say thank you! This was perfect!!!!
And Australians will continue to perpetuate all of the urban legends so we continue to look like bloody legends
nah, just for the yanks... because its so much fun
@@picsi-software and they always believe the advice of the locals ;-)
As an Australian living in the US I can confirm most of that is suuuuper unlikely to happen.
(Except the sun thing, it’s definitely challenging us to kill it).
You left out the part where snakes that are not classified as swimmers or known to swim may randomly swim up to you on the beach. I had that happen once with a brown snake.
In all fairness, it was at a nude beach, so I was really pushing my luck from the start.
A nude beach in Australia sounds like the worst idea I’ve ever heard wtf no offense but y’all are crazy
Except for drop bears. With urbanisation and the destruction of their natural habitat they have moved into the cities (much like the bin chicken)
@@tristenrobinson2657 coffee scroll & custard scrolls make the danger worth it.
Damn brown snakes are so scary, and they're fuckin fast too. I say this as someone who loves snakes, but seriously I would have pissed myself
I think Jonathan is ready to go. His expression is somehow like an eager toddler yelling from the car for mom to hurry up.
"Is there anything in Australia that won't try to kill me?"
Not really, no. It will either try to kill you or nearly kill you by accident.
Ants won't try and kill you, but they might try and carry you off
Hey, most of the frogs are okay! Just leave the toads alone, they're venomous.
@@weenacfeegle3086 🤣 good point
@@weenacfeegle3086 Also gotta be careful of stones, because they might not be stones, they might be stonefish. And they’re quite sensationally venomous.
And the humans will get you drunk, nearly killing you 😂😂
I do wonder how ophthalmologists deal with patients that come after a snake spit venom into their eyes
He has Jonathan for that
we give them a cane and a braille board
@@akshaypradeep4650 who gets the cane & braille? The snakes? Or the Opthamologist?
First you send them to passion control for the antidote after there life is no longer in danger you see if you can save the eyes.
I hear Australian ophthalmologists are specially trained for situations like that
Google is on a roll...! I was looking up just how big huntsman spiders get in Australia... then something about the spider rain... then the blue-ringed octopus... and finally as I was typing out to search "do koalas..." Google completed the query by suggesting "have chlamydia"?
Another awesome and informative skit, Dr. G!
That was hilarious. As a kiwi who lived in Australia l can confirm all of those things exist, well nearly all. Also, you forgot the venomous caterpillars. There's a very good reason the second official language of Australia is screaming! If any one is wondering why Australian and New Zealand magpies are so vicious it's because they're Gymnorhina tibicen a different species to the European ones. Homesick colonisers thought they looked similar enough.
The first official language is swearing, right?
And the Snakes !!!!!
@@SpamLamb1 Oh yeah. Good point. As a kiwi l often forget other countries don't swear as much as us and our cuzzies.
@@SpamLamb1 😂
@@nikiTricoteuse **the Irish have entered the conversation** 😂
As an aussie optom I also wholeheartedly welcome Jonathon to our shores, and don't worry about the water death traps, just stay between the flags and you'll be fine.... The other stuff on the other hand, you're on your own for.
Don't forget also the early onset reading glasses, too. 😉
As an Australian I didn't realize my life was so dangerous. How have I survived so long...
But really, I have never met a spider that is the size of a small dog. Sydney has the most poisonous spider, but spiders just want to get away from you, you're more likely to get into a boxing match with a kangaroo that you lose to, rather than get killed by a spider. I know because both my brothers have gotten kicked by kangaroos, but I've never met anyone that died or even was severely injured by a spider.
Watch out for the snakes though 😅
Haha omg
You sound young. Young enough that spider antivenom is common enough that you don't really have to worry. Wasn't so long ago that wasn't the case. Thanks, medicine!
How does one get kicked by a kangaroo?
@@jeffslote9671 Probably the same way one gets kicked by a horse. Standing in the wrong place while doing the wrong thing.
@@NeSeeger then again, you get kicked by a horse for standing behind them. But you get kicked by a kangaroo standing in front of them...
I've seen videos of them coming to people's yards, knocking on their front doors and all...
So... is now a bad time to mention they discovered a new species of trapdoor spider?
they're like normal spiders but have learned to employ guerrilla tactics by creating camouflaged hinged cover for their burrows that they can leap out of and drag prey back into.
😱😱😱
That's not a new species. Been around forever. Maybe just new to you
@@susie9893 trapdoor spiders yes, but they may well have specified a new species.
@@mandowarrior123 could be. But the description sounds exactly like the typical trapdoor behaviour I've seen (in real life and in documentaries). You?
@@susie9893 I mean a flaw in language or comprehension rather than in their information. Unintended implication or interpretation- "this new species is the only trapdoor spider that uses trapdoors"
I'm surprised you didn't bring up blue bottle season. It's the period in summer where blue bottle jellyfish (aka Portuguese Man O' War jellyfish) are so common in the ocean that they wash up on shore in droves. They're almost invisible in the water and they have stingers that will give you immensely painful stings. Sometimes lifeguards will close down entire beaches if the jellyfish swarms are too big.
Yeah I expected that too. Box jellies and irikanji too.
And the irukanji !!!
Jellyfish swarms.. . 😱😱😱
The unsettling fact that neurology looked genuinely amused by mentally torturing the ophthalmologist...🤣
I think the other doctors passive aggressively took their revenge on the poor opthamologist !!
I moved to Brisbane from the US a year and a half ago for med school here. All the students at UQ MD constantly quote your videos.
If you keep to the cities, the most you have to worry about is the magpies and dropbears. Also hope you don’t mind lots and lots of lizards.
and the diamond pythons in Brisvegas & nearby cities...
Lizards are cute!
And I'm sure a good Pickelhaube will take care of the dropbears, once the news gets around.
Australian here! I recently went overseas and got an American with the Drop Bears joke 😁
Koalas are adorable? Have you heard one growl??!! 😳
I love your videos 🇦🇺
Its more fun to offer them our version of Nutella though :) mmm just scoop up some of that loverly vegemite :)
Lots of tourists who come to Brisbane Queensland go to Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary to cuddle/hold one. Few get scared when the males start their mating call lol
For fucks sake mate, stop telling people drop bears a joke. Do you want them to become one of the hundred tourists that get killed each year?
@@FluffyPetal84 lol I’d like to see that 😈
I taught my daughter (4yo) about what to say to tourists. She can say a very innocent “watch out for drop bears”.
We teach em young.
How anyone could think they’re not prepared for every possible scenario when they have an Ophthalmologist’s Scribe with them escapes me.🤨
Australian, I laughed so hard about the stinging nettles/trees. Will never forget the first time I walked into one as a kid while trying to avoid a whole lot of wait-a-while/lawyer cane plants 😂
In summer people wear helmets with plastic spike things on them in a (mostly ineffective) bid to deter the magpie and plover armageddon. If the sun, snakes, spiders or sea life don't get us, the birds will.
Just out of curiosity, why birds?
Not stinging nettle, stinging tree. The Gympie Gympie is the most dangerous stinging plant on the planet.
@@natashka06 Austalian magpies and plovers are extremely aggressive. Plovers have the added bonus of the males having venomous spurs on their wings.
I grew up in far north QLD. When I was a kid we called them stinging nettles, stingers or stinging plants/trees interchangeably
He's not talking about stinging nettles. He's talking about the gympie gympie tree.
"Dont forget about the sun. Yeah for some reason it has a grudge against Austrailia and tries to incinerate everything." the delivery on that line sent me over the edge. the moment he said "infectious disease" i knew the chlamydia line was coming lmao
"They all have Chlamydia" is the new "It's not lupus" 😂
As a recent exchange student to Australia (yay Perth!) this is the same sort of talk I got before I left... and after I arrived, once everyone figured out I was new here. The sun definitely wants to kill everything, and boy howdy does the environment retaliate!
I thought you'd mention how the Magpies definitely target the eyes. Out of all the things mentioned I'm pretty sure the Magpies and the (mostly) harmless huntsman are the only ones I've actually had to deal with out here so you'll be fine.
If you make friends with them before breeding season, they will mostly ignore you, so make sure you help out your local bird friends!
You're in Melbourne, aren't you?
I like spiders. Although I think an unexpected one the size of a snack plate might startle me.😅
@@weenacfeegle3086 Brisbane actually. I'm just good at dodging wildlife
suddenly that wellness retreat sounds a lot better
This felt like a special little shout out to my specialty, medical toxicology!
its funny you should mention our swooping magpies, because the peewee (magpie-lark) while smaller and technically less aggressive than the Australian magpie has a habit of swooping from both above and below and going straight for the eyes
Don't forget the swooping butcher bird!
Why do they go for the 👁️ 👁️ 👀 eyes ?! 👀👀👀🫣🤔
omg i can't wait for you to come to australia!!! I find it inexplicably hilarious that it's under the banner of an infectious disease conference though. And it's on aprils fools. But so excited!!
What no way? Where did you see this info
Can we keep the opthamologist? We need him to handle the sheer number of pterygiums we have here
Jonathan already has his shades on, well prepared
Who knew that the the hospital could seamlessly unite all departments around fucking with Ophthalmology? Best thing that’s ever happened for morale !
Omg, don't forget that venomous fish that looks like a rock and can puncture through sandals. That thing is terrifying!
Ortho forgot to mention the jellyfish! Another fun seaside attraction.
I love your videos so much that at this point I just click Like before they've even started playing, lol.
It's the flies. The flies are the worst part.
As an Aussie, can vouch, this is all pretty legit and huntsmen are fast and huge! But as we say here in the land down under, she'll be right mate! 🇦🇺
Jonathan unfazed & prepped! 😁🤣
No worries Mate, Jonathan will protect you!
Yay if your in Brisbane, I highly recommend you take a day-trip to Stradbroke Island. You don't even need to drive, you catch the train to the ferry stop, get the ferry, and then use the bus that circles the island to get around. Lots of Kangaroos and dramatic walks along the cliffs and beaches.
I would add insect repellent is a good one to have for Straddy with all the blow flies.
As an Australian, I'm so pleased he got the memo about the sun.
Well congratulations you almost made me laugh myself into an asthma attack! That was amazing. Thank you for getting me to laugh for the first time in a week I'm in the hospital with pneumonia. Jonathan is everything
Don't worry about drop bears. Just take your pet jackalope along with you. But only if your jackalope has been properly neutered/spayed.
It will be stopped at the border. Even Jhonny Depp couldn't get his animals through.
@@lauradon8603 I can't tell from this comment if you know what jackalopes are or not.
Worth it for the free healthcare.
From the sound of it, charging for health in this continent would be the most monstrous thing imaginable.
You can pay meds wen you are dead.
I was just given $3,000 worth of medication today alone for free. I'll take the wildlife here any day with healthcare like this.
i love how every health care specialist talks about their own specialty patient hazards
as an australian I can confirm these are all true.
Especially the drop bears!
Well, shouldn't be crocs or sharks at the beach... Right?
Yep; beaches, rivers, lakes, billabongs.
Some of our major city rivers are home to bull sharks, well known for their aggression.
OMG. You've just insured I NEVER go to Australia.
@@ThomasNing oh yes, crocs up north and sharks down south
Lmao I knew as soon as infectious disease said there's koalas he was going to mention they all had Chlamydia XD
the only reason i will never set foot in australia is the fricking spiders. I've heard the horror stories. I also have arachnophobia.
in East Australia they have funnel web spiders.. but mostly the spiders are harmless. The last death from a redback was in 1956
I have arachnophobia and have lived in Australia for 44 years. It's not as bad as everyone makes out!
There have only been 13 funnel Web deaths and a tiny handful, 2 or 3 red back deaths confirmed ever in Australia. Our venomous spiders aren't that bad. Huntsman spider are huge, scurry like gigantic 8 legged horses but are completely 100% harmless. Actually they keep down the numbers of humongous cockroaches that want to dwell in your house.
Don't worry, it only rains spiders during floods, and no-ones died of a spider bite for years!
@@picsi-software and the redbacks are black widows that were brought here by migrants from North America
Drop bears can be pacified with chocolate biscuits (cookies). Always buy an extra pack for feeding them on the way home from shopping.😊
When I was a kid, my dad told me that nearly everything in Australia was poisonous, and if the prime minister bit you, you’d be dead in seconds.
You might want to come quick if you want to see koalas… Also, for all the deadly animals that live here, we do have some truly beautiful landscapes. I recently went for a road trip up the Kidman Way, and there was some lovely scenery. It did let me experience the most bugs I’ve ever seen in my life though. There were literal mounds of digi bugs every morning when I woke up, and walking at night genuinely scared the shit out of me as they pushed each other into and under my shoes.
I can only nod in Australian, but I promise you and Jonathan it's a friendly nod, a nod of greeting!
Have an awesome time, I hope you get to meet some of our lovely critters in a safe environment!
One of the best yet!! And some helpful hints from Tourism Australia: .(things) "that bite and sting - the rule of thumb is you have about 20 to 30 minutes until you will be hallucinating, having difficulty breathing and your heart may have stopped (venom often causes blood clotting)." Hmmmmm, the same signs as when I did my first hour of MED3 neurosurgery rotation!!! Coincidence? I think not!
You forgot about the snakes. And the funnel web spiders. And the birds and marsupials that can and will disembowel a human. Oh, and koalas? Will do you serious damage if you piss them off. Enjoy Australia! Don't worry about the magpies going for your eyes. They hardly ever do that... outside of nesting season, that is. Enjoy the sunshine! When it's not flooding, that is... 😂
Or bushfire season!
After reading the first couple of hundred comments, I'm sure Jonathan will be prepared for every death defying action necessary for a safe and relaxing trip! 👍
I see, so you only plan to go to East Australia :).. you should try West Australia - here basically all the plants are toxic, but we do have nicer weather :)
Always good to see our boy Jonathan
I live near where the blue-ring octopuses live, but I have centipedes, scorpions and mouse spiders in my back yard. Magpies and ravens are regular visitors - daily, actually - as well as a whole host of other native birds (including kookaburras), but the hawks and eagles usually only fly overhead… then there are the bin-chickens, aka ibises… won’t even blink/budge at my Dobermann!
Despite all the critters mentioned (and the ones I haven’t) it’s a beautiful patch of Earth. Don’t go to any of the Eastern states… it’s like a smaller version of where you come from. Go to Perth… the most isolated capital city in the world. Mellow and safe, and a sight for sore eyes, which I’m sure you’d appreciate 😉🙏🏼❤️
LOL the eastern states are the best! Perth is a small oasis in the middle of a red desert!
@@rosmarbal, you can keep the Eastern side, and I’ll just have Perth, thanks. I’ve seen what the East has to offer, and you’re more than welcome to keep it!🤣
All those birds control all those insects - no wonder they hang around. Your yard sounds like a feast
@@susie9893, even so, there aren’t enough birds to take care of the insects and arachnids. Besides, there are NO predators for Portuguese millipedes; they are chock-full of cyanide (not very appetising… and I’m actually being serious here lol)!
@@lindajohnson9282 yeah my folks have bull ants. Extremely difficult to control (unless you wanna poison your land into the bargain - and even then....)
Ortho forgot to mention venomous Stonefish, Box Jellyfish and coral ear growth - the beach is relaxing but not the water!
LOL northern beaches maybe. Queensland is the state with most of the deadly stuff.
Always happy to have you here, Doctor ❤
The sun having a grudge against Australia had me dying, lol. Don't forget about the stone fish too. That can also end your subscription to life.
Painfully
It's very rare for an outsider to understand 'Drop Bears'. Great video
😅 Excellent video, as usual. Poor other practices don't get a vacation, that would go further to reduce burn out than that retreat, lol. Loved the drop bears part! ❤
Hey, I absolutely love every single one of your videos! Do you think you could add a paramedic character, as we interact with almost all the different doctor characters you do! I’d be curious to know what doctors actually think about us after we drop them off a patient. I’m sure it would all make for more great humour!
My fav part of this vid is how a lot of those things the other docs are warning him about are totally real.
This is actually the start of Jonathan's rebellion. He's trying to orchestrate the death of the ophthalmologist.
These are all the reasons Australians have free health care 😂
Safe travels, I can definitely reassure you Australia is absolutely beautiful and you likely won't see any of the dangers...just don't leave the house without SPF50.
“Looking balls” 👀, I’m going to use that.
As an Australian...I love this!! All is true and you will love it!
Also I love the research lmao. Jonathan and eye bro should come to Melbourne, it's safer here than in most of the rest of the country
Expensive af tho. Come to Brisbane. Pretty sure the sounds of wildlife murdering each other all night is an anomaly in my suburb and not the norm.
@@renownedbandanawearer1345 honestly, from what I've seen we're cheaper than a lot of the country in terms of living costs.
Except for all the neo Nazis perhaps
Yet all of them combined (maybe except the sun) are less deadly than guns.
so true.. the most deadly things here is heart disease and tobacco
the sun is a deadly laser
At first I was like "wtf is a stinging tree, what is wrong with you Australia", but then I remembered that annual nettle exists and it's a very common plant where I live. And it stings really bad too
This is a tree not a nettle. It is the most dangerous stinging tree in the world and has been known to cause irritation for a year in some cases. Some people have killed themselves to stop the pain. Look up the Gympie Gympie.
They forgot to mention that everything is upside-down.
Honestly the one thing preventing me from visiting Australia is how terrified I get of our little house spiders in America. I am not sure I could deal with the ones in Australia.
You'll be fine! I have managed to survive 44 yrs in Australia with nothing worse than a few bull ant bites and one blue bottle jellyfish sting.
We get sprays done. I see fewer spiders in the house here than I did in the UK :)
I'm Australian and far more bothered by creepy crawlies in my house than outdoors. If you're not planning to go hiking on rarely used trails then you're unlikely to have any issues at all. On the other hand I'd be terrified to go camping in America cos you have bears and wild dogs and giant cats. We don't have any large predators unless you count sharks, but there's sharks in the US too.
The magpies around here are evolving. They seem to now sit in the tree and send their Jonathans (aka the Noisy Miners) to do their swooping for them!!
🤣🤣🤣🤣 Accurate
Not seeing that in Sydney
"looking balls" Ortho truly has best terminology.
Welcome to Australia, Dr G. Hope you have fun at ASID!
Huntsman spider = literally a spider that hunts man
Except they don't. Great for bug control
You forgot the Kangaroos and their lovely deadly kicks😂
And the cassowaries…
Just gotta watch out for the drop bears 😂😂😂😂😂 I lost it at that
Lol I do enjoy your videos! Wishing u and yours all the best!