The Buddha on Disagreement: His "Conflict-free" Teaching

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  • Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
  • Conflict often stems from our disagreements with others. Early Buddhism contains material that can help us deal with such conflicts. Indeed, the Buddha claimed to teach in a way that avoided conflict altogether. We will look at how this was the case through a particular sutta from the early tradition.
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Комментарии • 75

  • @DougsDharma
    @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

    ✅ Check out this playlist next on non-attachment: ruclips.net/p/PL0akoU_OszRiCb2Jxe488IqJQvT8uARjm
    🧡 Consider joining us on Patreon if you find benefit in these videos, and get fun extras like exclusive behind-the-scenes videos, audio-only versions, and extensive show notes: www.patreon.com/dougsseculardharma 🙂

  • @rajjj21
    @rajjj21 3 года назад +13

    "Enjoy every moment" Buddha said, and here I'm listening and enjoying/learning every bit of it.
    I don't think I can do anything better than that, for this moment.
    Thank you sir.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +2

      You're very welcome Raj. Thanks for the comment!

    • @theinngu5560
      @theinngu5560 2 года назад

      I don’t think the Buddha said ‘enjoy every moment’ …this sounds like indulgence and the Buddha actually said that ‘suffering is caused by craving’

  • @nellie2m
    @nellie2m Год назад +1

    Loving these videos I start my morning with them instead of scrolling Facebook. Unless you have already, can you talk about the Buddha's view on violence, what defines violence, and if violence is justified in defense of human rights? He seems to talk about interpersonal conflict, which is easy to walk away from, more than inter-class/country/group conflict.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  Год назад +1

      Thanks! Your question is complicated. I did an earlier video on the Buddha and self defense that might be useful:
      ruclips.net/video/3aXjrEdpIjY/видео.html , as well as a playlist on social and political issues in Buddhism that you could check out.

  • @chriskaplan6109
    @chriskaplan6109 2 года назад +1

    Doug, thank you for this insightful explanation. I felt I was really able to grasp the wisdom of these teachings thanks to your precise elaboration on the passages.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  2 года назад

      Wonderful, glad it was helpful to you Chris!

  • @nnnn65490
    @nnnn65490 3 года назад +4

    In one video you said someone asked you about having a blank mind during meditation. He said it caused him cognitive problems. How can meditation be dangerous? Like there are neurological side effects? What do you guys mean by doing it improperly?
    Love your videos!! 🖤 I like that you’ve been doing them in disagreement and conflict lately. Hope you do more!

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      Thanks Nathan, glad to be of service! 😀

    • @horizonanadyomene
      @horizonanadyomene 3 года назад +3

      I'm not sure anyone answered your question outright, but meditation can both trigger or be a cover for dissociation or derealization. I had a hard time with this at first; anxiety and ptsd often take over the meditation process and it can be extremely dangerous. People who have these problems should try to approach it from a cognitive or dialectical behavioral therapy perspective, which would allow them to access mindfulness in a more balanced way, under supervision from someone trained to recognize the effects and appearance of things like dissociative disorders and such

    • @janglestick
      @janglestick 3 года назад

      @@horizonanadyomene i agree, more discussion, with some body orientation, to begin with. and samatha, not a hardcore isolated vipassana retreat lol

    • @janglestick
      @janglestick 3 года назад

      @@horizonanadyomene dialectical behavioral therapy is super interesting, from what I understand it's basically a code word for people who are actually doing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy correctly, with an EMDR stage etc, instead of just writing CBT on an insurance form and giving ad infinitum talk therapy. apparently it's the only thing that works for some people, at least on the menu of stuff that might actually be covered by insurance

  • @flakesofgoat
    @flakesofgoat 3 года назад +7

    so grateful i found ur channel great vids!!! 👏 would u probably be able to talk about how buddhism can apply to depression? be well 🍃

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +2

      Thanks Flakes! I haven't talked specifically about depression because I think really it depends how deep the depression is. For mild depression, virtually all the videos will be useful, particularly say the video on stress: ruclips.net/video/61S8ZkpeCDQ/видео.html . For more serious forms though, really one needs professional psychological help first.

    • @flakesofgoat
      @flakesofgoat 3 года назад

      @@DougsDharma thank you doug :)

  • @bencharits
    @bencharits 3 года назад +1

    This is one of the best explanation on this sutta. Thank you for doing this. I have relearned what I already knew. Great explanation, truly!

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      Glad it was helpful Sompop! 🙏

  • @pacman470
    @pacman470 3 года назад

    14:51 - To this point I lost weeks in this kind of state, being affraid of losing mind, after leaving from 3yrs relationship (for the 3rd time) - not knowing what is true and what to trust inside anymore. I am in almost perpetual & constant state of rumination, invisionig situations that could've happen, reflecting on ones in which I failed and so on.. with ton of regret, envy, guilt, shame and helplessness watching in the direction for the future. Which is kind of interesting on the other hand, to see how little control I have on what is happening inside

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      That's right pac, a practice of calming may be helpful to at least begin to get it under control. But it takes time.

  • @rahulratan0
    @rahulratan0 3 года назад +3

    Nåmõ Büddhåy 🌷🙏
    Sir Douglass Smith 💗

  • @PaulTatoe
    @PaulTatoe 3 года назад +1

    Another great video, and congratulations on 40,000 subscribers!

  • @xiaomaozen
    @xiaomaozen 3 года назад +1

    "What can be said at all, can be said clearly" (Ludwig Wittgenstein).
    Mission accomplished, Doug! 😊 🙏🏻

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      I hope so xiao mao! That's what I try to do, even though I may mess it up sometimes! 😄

    • @xiaomaozen
      @xiaomaozen 3 года назад

      @@DougsDharma
      "Nobody is perfect" they say. 🤷‍♂️ 😂 But the lessons I've watched as yet are not so far away from it. 😉

  • @aaron___6014
    @aaron___6014 2 года назад

    16:00 summary of where conflict comes from followed by the teaching.

  • @drewrodrigues
    @drewrodrigues 3 года назад +1

    Hey Doug. I love the videos! Just one thing I would find very helpful: a general outline at the end of your introduction as an anchor. Sometimes I find myself getting a tad lost on the direction of the conversation. Although, maybe it's just a personal issue. But keep up the great work!

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      Thanks for the suggestion Drew. Sometimes I do try to outline the talk at the start, but often I forget to do that and it's good to be reminded! I'll try to remember! 😀

  • @anicca6877
    @anicca6877 3 года назад +1

    Great insight!😀

  • @a7i20ci7y
    @a7i20ci7y 3 года назад +1

    So relevant. Thank you.

  • @matteosollecito2448
    @matteosollecito2448 3 года назад +1

    Doug, this is a very helpful video.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      Glad to hear it Matteo, thanks! 🙏

  • @keerthisabbisetti6850
    @keerthisabbisetti6850 3 года назад +1

    Thanks for such a beautiful insight and it hepled me a lot.

  • @Izzazzo
    @Izzazzo 3 года назад +1

    Always enjoy a good listen to you. I was having a couple "disagreement" with my roommate the past few days. And really it's not a matter of disagreeing but rather asserting how I need to be conducting myself in life and in business. So I guess it's standing form to my guiding beliefs, and doing my best to be on the 8-fold Path. But no matter how I try to slice it, I was still feeling overly emotional, and getting loud at times. I feel like this individual is very unyielding in ways so how do I approach a bull-headed person like this without also becoming bull-headed? This is very challenging, I'm not going to lie.
    I am basically still doing karma yoga since I am new to the 8-fold Path.....so I am not technically meditating yet because I am still immature in that respect. And it's my understanding that true meditation will come when I am truly ready for it.
    So without meditation, how do I find and build on that true sense of peace? I have been doing more mantras and Vishnu worship (my Istha-Deveta), but what more can I do to really balance myself in this sense?

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      It's hard to say Michael, but I'd imagine it would perhaps be most helpful to find a local sangha or meditation group that you could attend either in person (always best) or virtually.

    • @Izzazzo
      @Izzazzo 3 года назад

      @@DougsDharma I was pondering how you might reply...and I agree, it's difficult to say. I just feel so powerless over my emotions sometimes no matter how much I am devoted to all of this. the answers will come in time. thanks for reaching out.

  • @gabu6953
    @gabu6953 3 года назад +1

    Please make a videoes on concept of Hell and heaven in Buddhism

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      Yes I've done a video on that general topic, here it is Vedant: ruclips.net/video/JEwQvlfMUf8/видео.html

  • @nuwanperera1977
    @nuwanperera1977 3 года назад

    What you are saying here does make sense when we are living in the society but "conflict-free" teaching in Buddhism is unheard of. If you see the life of Buddha, there are number of occasions where arguments, debates and conflicts taken place, where Buddha trying to get the point across to people. This makes complete sense because Buddhism trying to teach the uselessness of the world to bunch of people who thinks world has some essence. Therefore, conflict is inevitable. The deference in Buddhism I see is that conflicts has nothing to do with being dishonest, violent or arrogant toward the other person with lustful, hateful and/or dilutional thoughts. It is purely for the benefit of the other person as you mentioned. Further to this, Buddha clearly mentioned in the Maha Parinibbana Sutta that one can defend and put forward facts based on dhamma when someone talk utter nonsense (according to dhamma of course).
    If I tell you something about these Pali translations, it is like you are trying to perform a surgery using a medical book translated by a carpenter. It is apparent that the context and connection toward nirvana is missing on these translations. When lay people translate dhamma like that, there is always a chance for various misinterpretations and that is what you have now in various formats. What’s worse is that people call these various interpretations and ideas as Buddhism.
    I also want to point out that, your our explanation of “papncasannasankha (පපඤ‍්චසඤ‍්ඤාසඞ‍්ඛා)” missing very important clarification that described in three additional words and they are abhinandithabban(අභිනන්‍දිතබ‍්බං), abhiwadithabban (අභිවදිතබ‍්බං) and apjosethabban (අජ‍්ඣොසෙතබ‍්බං). Basically, the collective meaning is not just the perceptions, but the perceptions dirtied by three flavors of Thanha, because sometimes perceptions can be facts when it comes to dhamma. This dhamma has no holes 😊.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      Just an FYI, the translations I am using in these videos are not by laypeople. They are by Bhikkhu Bodhi and Bhikkhu Sujato. So too are the interpretations of the relevant terms in this video. So while there are laypeople who are just as adept at dhamma as monastics, in this case the material is itself monastic in origin.

    • @nuwanperera1977
      @nuwanperera1977 3 года назад

      @@DougsDharma Thank you for the reply Doug, please note that this is not a criticism on your sources, I am sure Ven. Bhikkhu Bodhi and Ven. Bhikkhu Sujato are well respected and well-known monastics. The issue I am referring to is going back to 1958, that was when the base Pali thripitaka translated by a gathering of Bhikkhus from various countries. Deep philosophical concepts of the Buddhism lost in that translation because the translators were literature experts rather than stream enterers who has the correct understanding of Dharma. At that time and even to this date, this deep philosophical knowledge of Buddhism exists in the forests of Sri Lanka and possibly other countries as well. But many main stream Buddhist establishments against this because it challenges the very existence of those establishments. Thanks to RUclips, bit of it out there nowadays but, getting any publicity or air time is impossible for this Dharma in Sri Lanka. This is probably the reason Bhikkhu Bodhi could not find this Dharma when he was ordained in Sri Lanka in early 70’s. And, that is why I referred what you have as Dharma to a medical book translated by carpenters instead of doctors 😊.

  • @peef2572
    @peef2572 3 года назад +1

    Interesting video. I think the skeptical school of Pyrrhoism (which is said to be similar to or even influenced by Buddhism) takes this idea to the extreme and says we should not take a position of certain knowledge of any issue. This will lead to a state of contentment. What are your thoughts on having just the intellectual understanding of things like non-attachment/non-self? I found accepting these ideas in general through argument, has made me calmer and relaxed (maybe a consistent meditation practice will make me even more aware of attachments as they come and go).

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      Thanks Matthew. I think an intellectual understanding of the dharma is a necessary first step, but only a first step. One needs also to practice with it: seeing it in your life moment to moment over a long period of time.

    • @peef2572
      @peef2572 3 года назад

      Doug's Dharma Thanks for your response, I am looking forward to more of your videos. The Buddha had a lot of insights that I find compelling, and reasonable. It will be interesting to learn more through practice/experience. Have a good day sir!

  • @radekkubica6089
    @radekkubica6089 3 года назад +1

    Doug, please, can you do some video about Buddha's teachings about oneness (I mean I am confused whether there are as many consciousness as there are humans, animals etc, but I often hear about there is only one universal consciousness) and therefore I am confused whether it means I am only consciousness that exist or "other's people consciousness" exist also. It seems to me that I (as the consciousness) am not you (you as the consciousness) since I cant feel what are you feeling or I cant control parts of your body. But the term of one consciousness is really confusing to me because I understand it like I am you and every other's consciousness at the same time.😆

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      Yes that's a subject I do plan to do a video on eventually, thanks Radek!

    • @radekkubica6089
      @radekkubica6089 3 года назад

      @@DougsDharma Thank you too!

  • @kylebarnett9234
    @kylebarnett9234 3 года назад

    Hey doug. I am just watching a variety of your videos. As I have fallen on the path during covid and trying to get back on track.
    But out of curiosity (not sure if you have fully covered this or not) it would he nice to hear your thoughts on the concept of maha samadhi or self surrender based death from a deep concentration experience. Is this really possible?

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      I'm not sure which practice you're talking about. Do you mean nirodha samāpatti, the cessation of perception and feeling? If so I'm really not sure whether it's possible or not, but I'm somewhat skeptical. In the early texts it is very underdescribed and seems only to be achievable by enlightened people, so it's not really clear what the state is anyhow.

    • @kylebarnett9234
      @kylebarnett9234 3 года назад

      @@DougsDharma Ah I see. I believe it was a bit more explored in hindu texts perhaps. The idea pf someone who is fully awakened may choose to leave his own body by shutting off his life force at his own will. In otherwords dying by using his mental will during a samadhi like state.

  • @jaan6353
    @jaan6353 3 года назад

    Hello sir ,
    I want to know Gautam Buddha about hair ?

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      OK, that's an unusual request but in fact I have an unusual video on whether the Buddha was bald: ruclips.net/video/N9ltD8wYQCQ/видео.html

  • @Jordiwasp
    @Jordiwasp 3 года назад +1

    Thank you for your interesting video. I am an ethical vegan often engaged into "disagreements" with others because of my "ahimsa" beliefs. Sometimes I wonder if I may become too attached to the philosophy of veganism for being constantly forced to defend it in a carnist environment, but can a Buddhist be too attached to the Dharma, or a monk to the sanga? I would be interested in your opinion.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +2

      Great question Jordiwasp. Yes, the Buddha argued that one could be too attached to the dharma, particularly if one used the dharma to win debates and arguments with others, or if one became emotionally enmeshed in the praise or displeasure of others about the dharma. One does need a certain amount of attachment in early stages just to put in the effort, but any attachment is a double-edged sword.

    • @Jordiwasp
      @Jordiwasp 3 года назад +1

      @@DougsDharma Interesting. Thank you very much. I note the "timing" component of your answer. It's almost as "proficiency" in anything involves less attachment, as whatever you have become proficient in becomes more natural and there is less of a need to dedicate efford to it.

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      @@Jordiwasp Yes, exactly.

  • @photistyx
    @photistyx 3 года назад +1

    Great talk. I love the ones with extra nitty gritty. Reading the original sutta that you referenced, I was interested to see that the Buddha is said to have specifically given this for recitation. I wasn't aware that some things were indicated in advance as being for recitation. Are there a lot of references to this practice in other places in the cannon? I'm also curious about how the rest of the story (the parts that weren't what the Buddha said) was presumably flagged for recitation. Are there any indications about how these decisions were made and whether there was an editing process?

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад +1

      Thanks photistyx, interesting question. I'm not sure we can read that the Buddha meant the monastics to recite what the Buddha had said; I think the word (uddesaṃ) could just mean "(expounded) for instruction", though it could mean "(expounded) for recitation (by the monastics)". I'm not enough of a Pāli scholar to be sure. The whole sutta however is supposed to have been remembered by Ānanda and recited at the First Council. The real answer is that we don't know exactly how the material came down in its earliest form. There would eventually have been groups of monastics tasked with communal recitations of suttas, under direction from senior monastics most likely. I mention a bit of this in one of the lectures in my course on the Buddha's Life over at the ODI.

  • @edwinnthomas4612
    @edwinnthomas4612 3 года назад

    Sir please read some books of osho on budhism

  • @paulomoreira995
    @paulomoreira995 11 месяцев назад

    There is another vídeo where you explana conflict, but i Just cant find...

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  11 месяцев назад +1

      There is this one ... ruclips.net/video/3aXjrEdpIjY/видео.html

    • @paulomoreira995
      @paulomoreira995 10 месяцев назад

      Thanks a lottt

  • @griffin2263
    @griffin2263 3 года назад

    sometimes we reply on intuition about situations and listening to your inter voice for safety reasons .. .with out judging but sometimes that inner voice or 6th sense cant be ignored ....is that different ? like some times you get an unease able a person or place ? ?

    • @DougsDharma
      @DougsDharma  3 года назад

      The "inner voice" or intuition isn't necessarily a problem. It only becomes a problem when it turns into obsession or proliferating thoughts that circle around and around a subject.

  • @hz7988
    @hz7988 3 года назад

    Good video. A pity you have adsense turned on.

  • @hz7988
    @hz7988 3 года назад

    Please stop the advertisement. Thank you 🙏

  • @marekgrzybek7167
    @marekgrzybek7167 3 года назад +1

    "The bad politician in tv!". Yeap. My daily papañca...