A Late Night Emotional Pre-Christmas Vlog
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- Опубликовано: 22 авг 2024
- I’m so sorry for the limited vlogs! It’s summer holiday time in Australia and combined with all the medical treatments and appointments I’ve been finding it hard to vlog. I just pulled my camera out to record something and it turned out to be quite raw and emotional, but I’m going to load it straight away so you know what’s happening! Life is just tough sometimes! Despite it all I’m looking forward to a Merry Christmas and wish Christmas Blessings on You and Your Family also. Caitlin xxx
#cancer #cancervlog #ThymicCarcinoma
#momvlogger #Motherhood
Caitlin Taylor
PO Box 264
Harlaxton QLD 4350
Australia
It’s ok to be emotional with your raw feelings and at the same time believe in miracles. It’s not one or the other. Lord please heal Caitlin.
Amen!
From my Heart to yours Love Blessings and strength Praying all of these but most of all Peace over your family
Hi Caitlin, I've been meaning to comment for awhile. I came to know of you when the ladies at ABC group told me of you. I have been following ever since. I was hoping to meet you at the Christmas lunch but was working on the wards. I have met your friend Liz a few times too. I, too, am a Christian, and I totally get the process you speak of in regards to healing. I love and respect your bravery in being real. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I pray God gives you the strength this Christmas to enjoy your time with your family and you stay well in the process. May God bless you and keep you and make His face shine upon you and your family and keep you in His peace- love and God Bless- Ruthy xox❤
Thanks Ruth. I’ve heard so much about you I was examining your photo very carefully when I saw one with Gayle and Thalia for something this week! Thanks for these lovely words and I look forward to meeting you in person one day!
Caitlin, you are so very precious. Always smiling, wanting others to be happy, feeling guilty when they are not, and feeling like a failure. Caitlin, it is not YOUR fault that you have cancer. True, your kids are at that very well self-centered age. But I'm heart broken that they don't get it. They should pamper you with support and love. A lot of people are here for you to listen to your hurt. Let yourself vent. You are so very special.❤
It is heart breaking but not surprising that the children struggle, their mother has had such chronic illness for half or more than half of most of their lives, they are all on stretch and need pampering and support themselves. It is a rough road to be sure, you are so right to encourage such precious and bold vulnerability.
Dearest Caitlin. Whatever your journey, the one thing I know with absolute certainty is that your children know that they could not have a more wonderful, loving & present mother. You are truly extraordinary. Sending much & admiration from the UK.
Thanks for your kind words. I know deep down they are very secure in their love. Sometimes the day to day can get us all down though, so thanks for the reminder.
Can't hear you.
DearCaitlin you are a beautiful person and everything you are experiencing is normal but very hard and sad. Being so unwell and just wanting to do nothing but pushing yourself to the extreme to make life for the children as happy as possible. Having family dramas as well makes it that much harder. I think the build up to Xmas has become very stressful and sometimes its hard to feel the joy it’s meant to bring ❤ sending love to you and your family ❤
I'm so sorry for what you're going through. It really is unfair and I totally understand your sadness and frustration. Sending prayers and all good wishes. Merry Christmas xx
Thanks for understanding and caring.
You are an amazing Mum Caitlin … hugs xxxx
Thanks so much.
You are such an amazing woman! You are such a trooper and you should be so proud of yourself. You push yourself way beyond what I'd ever be able to do. You are truly a beautiful person. I cry with you🙏
Oh, thank you. xxx
Caitlin you are a great Mom and you have a beautiful soul. I pray that God wraps his loving arms around you and gives you this miracle.Its ok to not feel yourself it’s part of your journey. Big hugs and I will see you in the next one.
Oh how I cried & cry with & for you! Your vulnerability is gutsy and I pray & hope it helps many and that some sore & weary hearts feel less alone and encouraged by your beautiful transparencies. ❤🙏🏻
One of my favourite memories of you is The Hobbit. Remember how we learnt runes to be able to read the notes the girls who sat in front of us in class were passing. Turned out we learnt Hobbit runes and they were writing in LotR runes. 😂 You are far from Smegel. You are absolutely Frodo. Your journey is long and hard and you keep on living through all the trials against all odds. I had terrible fights with Mum when she was sick. They are angry at you because they want you to be the superhero they think you are and you can't. You're being a different type of hero. They, like me, will grow up to understand what was going on. Love to you all.
I am not sure it was me! I think I missed reading The Hobbit as a teen and read it as an adult! Anyway, it’s just a Smegel look, I don’t think my character has disintegrated to that level! But thanks for the vote of confidence that I’m a Frodo! Appreciate your insights of a kid who has experienced cancer. Hard stuff that not many people can fully understand.
You are really being hard on yourself, you are only human! I know exactly what you are going through God Bless you!!!!
Lovely, don’t apologise. Nobody here wants anything more than for you to get well. Spend whatever non-medical time you have with your kids and don’t worry about vlogging until they are back in school and you have 5 mins to yourself. Wishing you and your family a lovely, safe and relaxing Xmas.
Just wanted to add that you have the loveliest inner beauty that radiates outwards. 😘
Your home looks beautiful!
You are beautiful Caitlin. Your smile lights up that room, not the tree. 🥰
Oh thank you! You’re too sweet!
Prayers, hugs and love for you and all of your family! I'm watching this one today as I sit alone without my husband who died from thymic carcinoma almost 4 months ago. Today would have been our 24th marriage anniversary . My biggest advice because you know to enjoy every moment that you can and you're a little frustrated because some of them aren't cooperating all the time but what I've learned is to feel the feels when you feel them if you're happy, feel happy. If you need to cry, cry. You're still living but your whole family is grieving the loss of what was considered normal before cancer . They're probably feeling a little stuck. Tears are healthy . Moving forward is healthy. Taking a break is healthy. And I am most grateful for you sharing your journey on this vlog. I am praying for you! ❤
What a beautiful encouragement, I'm sorry to hear of your own journey and the loss of so much. I wish you had a different story to tell today 24 years from your marriage. Bless your heart. ❤
thank you
My thoughts are with you. I hope Christmas wasn’t too hard without Joe. Im sorry you are experiencing all the sad firsts like missing Wedding Anniversarys. We are definitely enjoying the moments, but living in the day to day as a family sometimes. I’m so glad you enjoy the vlog. Thanks for staying in contact.
I truly hope that you have a Merry Good Christmas with your family...and that it doesn't get too hard and stressful for your body....I pray God comforts you and give to you your healing...Merry Christmas Sweet lady...Made it truly be the best Christmas ever...🙏🎄🙏🎁🙏🎄🙏
Thanks for those beautiful well wishes. I receive them in the beautiful spirit they are given. Merry Christmas to you too.
Dear Caitlin❣️ I’ve been worried about you… I’m so glad that you were able to post a video. I love you, your courage & strength! I know you have been going through a very difficult time - not feeling well (understandably so!), taking Care of your beautiful family & trying to balance family & treatments. Don’t be so hard on yourself! It’s so nice that you have a wonderful support system! I’d like to share this with you, from Dr Robert Schuller: “Tough times never last, but Tough People Do!” You are a wonderful Lady! “Let not your ❤ be troubled!” God Bless you & your family. Wishing you a Merry Christmas & and a very
Happy, Healthy & Blessed New Year!!! I’m a retired RN from WA state in the USA.
Praying for a miracle for you Caitlin. Every day
I just so appreciate this comment❤ xxx
Glad to hear from you again,but sorry you're worrisome. Well, you're not alone alot of people are emotional this time of year. I thought I was going to see a few fist fights in the stores this week😂. Love your tree and decorations🎄🙂. I pray for a miracle for you warrior lady🙏🏻🙂
Thanks a lot. Yes, Christmas can. Ring the worst out of some people. My kids love it, so we need to focus on all the best of Christmas and its true meaning! I’m sure that will help!
Caitlin, I am so saddened to hear how tough this journey has been for you. I hear the exhaustion in your voice. Please try and keep your spirits up, it does help considerably. I am also on this journey, while every cancer journey is an individual journey, I just want you to know that I do know something about what you are facing. Some moments I am able to keep on smiling and other moments I am consumed by waves of fear and tears. It is in those later moments, that I have to hand it over to God. If I didn't I am afraid I wouldn't be able to pull myself up again. I am sending you the biggest virtual hug. Keep fighting Caitlin. Keep fighting!! 🧡
Thanks for understanding. Yes, it is a relief to put my biggest concerns and fears in the loving arms of Jesus.
And I wish you a Merry Christmas and strength and healing this Christmas season.
Caitlin it's very understandable that you feel emotional and never feel you have to say sorry ! I admire your strength and determination to keep doing everything you do . I hope with all my heart you get your miracle ❤. Happy Christmas and best wishes for 2024 from the UK xxx
Your tree is beautiful!
Praying you get your miracle……Merry Christmas and enjoy your family time!! 🙏👍❤️🙏👍❤️👍🙏👍❤️❤️👍🙏🤗
I’m so glad you can let your emotions out 😢
Praying for a miracle for you. I pray you have a nice Christmas. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
We did have a lovely Christmas.
Sweetest Caitlin 💛✨🙏. May the Holidays be a blessed time with friends and family and may the new year bring to you love and peace. I have missed you alot, however, it’s understandable when so much is going on… take time to relax with your children and husband 💕🫶🏻. It is a time to rest and think about YOU! Sending love and hugs to you sweet one 🫂🥰
Thanks for missing me and thanks for being understanding why Karina! Merry Christmas to you and your family. I’ve appreciated your comments this year, see you in 2024, if not before!
(continued) with Good Wishes…
“Trust in the Lord with all your ❤️…” You are an Amazing Lady with a Positive Personality! - always a sweet Smile. 😊 It ‘s OK to cry too. Everyone knows that you are a Wonderful Mother! Be Good to yourself…
Have your children & family help with the house & festivities. They are all old enough. Give each of your kids a task to complete. Wishing you & family Happy Holidays! Praying 🙏💥 for your HEALING… God Bless!
🏡🎄🎁🥗🫶🐾🙏🙏🙏😘
Of course we miss you 🥰, Ifeel like 2024 will be a very good year. May it bring soo much joy and happiness in your life sweetest one 💛. Thank you for your kind wishes as well. 😘😘
Sending you love and prayers darling🤗🙏❤️🎄🎄🎄 xx
Thanks.❤
I’m so sorry you are going through this. We do serve a Great God and He is full of mercy. Will be praying for you. Be sure to let people help you over Christmas and don’t stress over what you are not able to accomplish. Your children and family will just appreciate having the time together. Hope yours is a Merry Christmas 🎄🎁 ❤.
Try to enjoy the holidays and let your family help with all that needs to be done., especially the gingerbread house 😄 Your Xmas tree is beautiful. 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
We’ll see what happens with the gingerbread houses! I’m the only one on both sides of the family who has established this as a tradition, so if it happens after Christmas, so be it!
Dearest Caitlin, first of all the gentlest hugs for you. You're doing such a good job as a Mom while fighting a dreadful disease. I'm sending heartfelt Christmas wishes and prayers to you and your family. Your inner and outer beauty are shining as always, God be with you.
Thanks so much Susana. Feeling the love!
Hi Caitlin, only just catching up with you. You are bound to be feeling emotional it’s only natural, I love that you share your real emotions no point in glossing over pretending that everything is fine. I hope that you had the best Christmas possible in the circumstances. Sending lots of love and positive healing energy your way xx
Thanks so much for caring.
Dont be sorry, you have a lot on your plate!! Cry if you need to. You won't be the first. My heart breaks for you💔 Go rest you need it! Cry, cry, cry...it helps!!❤
You are so kind. I do have a bit of a cry when I need to.
Caitlin, you are so loved. I was so happy to see a video from you. I pray for you and your family. We do indeed serve a good, good God
Thanks for following along. I’m feeling the love. xxx
Praying for your miracle. May you and your family have a very Merry Christmas .
❤❤❤
❤
Sending so much love 💗🙏💗
Thanks
I'm sorry things are going so sucky at the moment. Peace to you and your family.
Thanks.
My heart is hurting for you. I am sending you some good vibes juju and prayers. ❤️🙏❤️
Thanks for your compassion. Feeling the love and juju!
I’m so sorry you are going through all of this. Miserable disease.
Thanks for your compassion.
You are so strong. Let’s hope for a better 2024.@@caitlinscancerchronicles
❤
HAPPY HOLIDAYS❤
❤❤
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️❤️❤️
Hi Caitlin. This is Cheryl again. I'm using my husband Lesters phone that's why his name shows up.
I'm so glad you posted a video. I've been so worried. I miss seeing ur beautiful smiling face.!
Caitlin, your children LOVE you and know that you love them. They understand what you are going thru honey.
Please have the Merriest of Christmas. I say prayers every night hoping your treatment goes well.
Your Christmas tree is awesome and I can't wait to see the gingerbread house!
Trust me when I say this...if I could take your pain and cancer away, I would take it right now❤.
❤🎄☃️⛄❄️🎄
You look beautiful ❤
Thank you!!
Why would people come to visit when you’re going through chemo.Very hard to host when you are ill.Some people have no clue !
I wasn’t going through chemo when the decision was made. Also they are family and they are all very considerate and caring, so I know that they will be ever so helpful. I’m actually looking forward to it! Yes there’s a bit of extra pressure, but at least my house is looking better for it, I think the benefits will outweigh the extra pressure. Christmas will always have a degree of pressure. ❤
Praying for a healing for her amen try cannabis oil and THC and worm medicine for animals to kill cancer amen
These are things I have researched and not be doing.
Hi Caitlin, watched your video this morning, from Florida, United States. I am so sorry you are going through all of this, and please know, with your older teenager, he is just being a teen, unfortunately, at not a stellar time for you, that being said, you nor your husband should never allow disrespect, ever. As far as bribing the kids to do some chores, your husband needs to get behind you and tell those kids, CLEAN UP - They don't need pocket money - THAT IS NOT HOW IT WORKS. I understand you have cancer, and don't feel well and that you feel like your time is limited, THAT BEING SAID, KIDS ARE KIDS AND THEY NEED TO LEARN LIFE LESSONS, AND KEEPING A HOME AND THEMSELVES CLEAN AND TIDY IS THEIR JOB. I have been major down with illnesses off and on in life, and I would NEVER allow such from kids, nope and nope. Also, in one of your videos' you mentioned feeding enough for the kids, well they are old enough to make a grilled cheese sandwich, or fry and egg or make some egg salad. Also, if some of your family has great one pot, crock pot, or oven meals, to ask them to buy ingredients make them FOR you at their homes and then you pay them for the ingredients and start FILLING YOUR FREEZER, THAT WAY YOU ALWAYS WILL HAVE SOMETHING TO PULL OUT AND HEAT UP IN THE OVEN. I am sure they would gladly do this for you. I am NOT yelling with caps, people are so into the CAPS as yelling, but they, in their ignorance, forget that CAP is/are also for making a point, or brining attention to something important, etc.
Well, I know that putting my life out there raw and being authentic exposes my flaws and weaknesses, so I suppose I have set myself up to be criticised, which is what this feels like, even though I feel that you are trying to give some helpful advice. I know I’m not a perfect parent and there’s areas I can do better, I guess when I say things, especially in a low moment, I don’t say all the other things that have gone on behind it. I look at some families where kids just pitch in seamlessly and appear to do chores without complaining and being asked. I would love to have my house working like that, but it’s not always the case. They can have stretches of being really good, and then sometimes not. I do know they are a lot better than many kids out there, but there are many better. Also in my defense is I’ve had cancer for seven years, it makes training harder! They also do jobs without pay to help out. Bribe was definitely the wrong word to use, I used it more tongue in cheek. My children get a very small amount of pocket money, smaller than most of their peers, they are expected to do jobs within that, but todays jobs are a bit extra like cleaning windows or gardening and sometimes I will offer them the chance to increase their income this way. It might not be the way you would choose, but it’s also not uncommon for parents to do. You need to remember your opinion of what worked for you, doesn’t necessarily work for all families. As for disrespect, first let me defend my eldest. I never said which child it was and it definitely wasn’t him. Yes, we have struggled with disrespect lately, this isn’t something that I’m ignoring. You know a bit about my life, but you don’t know everything. You also don’t know about the extra hurdles we have thanks to neurodivergence and parenting decisions based on our own childhoods and trauma from the past. My children do know how to cook a bit, they may not do it to the extent that you recommend but I like cooking and it’s something I have not fully chosen to give up. They often can get simple meals for themselves and they do. I do have freezer meals but when I’ve realised at the last moment it’s usually easier to get simple things for dinner rather than wait for the frozen meal to defrost. I don’t have to justify myself, but I just would like you to know that if you were sitting telling me this in person, perhaps you would hold some of your opinions back because my circumstances are different to your circumstances. Also, I had literally just thought, “Why is she yelling at me” when you said you weren’t yelling at me. While it was good to hear you weren’t, maybe considering that caps now do mean yelling, you might consider they are too strong too make a point. Believe me, even without caps, you made your point.
If you feel like you have to explain you're not yelling, nunya, it's probably not clear to the average bear. Perhaps it's time to accept the current understanding most broadly accepted in our culture. If you honestly don't intend to be perceived that way, perhaps dont do it?
Although, I will be so bold as to venture that certain based on the content and tone of your comment and the placement of your capitals that you have emphasised to the point of a YELL!
What were you genuinely trying to achieve here? In such a raw moment of vulnerability, do you think parenting advice without depth of understanding or specific details is warranted or helpful? I think perhaps your energies might be better spent on compassion.
Also, I am curious, Nunya? Is this name tongue in cheek as in "NUNYA BUSINESS?" regardless, it seems such a pertinent phrase right now that I felt to emphasise in the way you suggest.
@@mattjuliennedoran6514 let me tell you something, I will not conform and accept the current understanding most broadly accepted in our culture, as you say. I am not a follower, and will not be going of the edge of the cliff just because everyone else is running, but you go ahead, ok? As for my YT name, perhaps you shouldn't assume. You do know what assuming means. As far as talking to Caitlin, and I will reply to her comment, I am from the South, raised in the South and we have respect and manners, and if you forget about them someone will call you out, it's that simple, honesty is the best policy, right? Never a time for disrespect ever. My niece at 36 made a disrespectful comment in a room full of family and friends and it didn't go over well, and she apologized and that was that, she recognized her error and admitted to the disrespect. All of our family and friends are this way, these are the honest, good people I choose to be around. and NOPE we don't tell each other a dress looks good, or hair looks good, etc., if we think it doesn't. We live our lives Faith based believers in God, and so no GRAY areas on truth, and kindness requires truths. Our family is going through some major changes too in heath issues with a few that are elder and 1 that is just a child, but again, sharing the load and talking things our and honesty is the key to smooth sailing and getting things done and staying on top of life. I had great parents and grand parents and we are passing all those great traits down in our family, paramount is God and there are no gray areas in the Bible. And BTW everyone of my family are successful if life, all without lying and not being a follower, imagine that.
@@caitlinscancerchronicles - Morning for you, afternoon for me. As I told a commenter below, I don't conform to norms, when norms these days don't mean truth, and the caps don't mean just yelling. I won't be following the others over the cliff, I am one that would be going, "wait, why is everyone running". I am from the South, born and raised and disrespect for any reason just isn't a thing and will get you called out no matter your age or where we are, or who we are with, that's the way my family and friends roll, and no one gets mad or stays mad, because we all know, as well as the person being disrespectful has it coming, I have done it myself, we address it and move on, because of our upbringing, no grudge is held because we know that we know better and can do better. God first, and with God there has to be truth in everything, there are no gray areas in the Bible, Gods word/letter to us. I know you love to cook, I have seen that, I think it's great, I do too, but w/a few things going on here in my life, I got friends and family to make some fav dishes that can be frozen and make things easier for the caregivers w/a few we have that are sick or their family is sick, it takes the pressure off for the time being. I love your content, you have a beautiful home and family. I hate you are going through a cancer journey and you as well has your family are in my prayer list. I know I don't see everything, but when someone is in a weak moment, and tearful, my own empathy and sympathy pours over and so, this was another reason why I wrote what I did to you above. I wanted to come through and hug you and then I wanted to send you money to go get that SALMON. I looked to see if you have Paypal, budt didn't find you, but I haven't done paypal in a long while
Nunya, you say you believe in calling people out for disrespect, I am calling you out. The capitalising is disrespectful. Doing something that is socially accepted as disrespectful and saying you "won't conform" to society & not do it but also that you value respect does not add up.
You say an apology & simply moving on means things are done & all good, yet you continue to barate about children you do not know in circumstances you do not fully comprehend, you don't even know if apologies etc have been done here & yet continue to make assumptions about what courses of action & responses have & haven't been happening; these assumptions and your whole tone is disrespectful and unhelpful.
I hope you appreciate being called out as you say you are, I think perhaps if compassion & empathy is your goal your approach could do with a review, maybe start with dropping the capitals?
I'm sorry you & yours are going through a rough patch. I am glad you say you have faith in God, with that you cannot go wrong, may His mercy & peace be on you all. Merry Christmas.