I think it’s harder to get over someone you are/were in a proper relationship with. Crushes fade and start to become meaningless once you get over them but true love can take an eternity to move on from.
@@shaniajackson7864 or you see/hang out with someone who seems clearly interested in you, sleep with them and then it changes all of a sudden, this is the worst scenario out there and mostly seems to happen to attractive women🙄
Dear crush, You were the first and only guy in high school to make my heart skip a beat. Every time I heard your name my stomach would flutter with butterflies. I liked you for your playful, jokester ways...but when it came to my feelings, you should've stopped. But you didn't. I should hate you for that but I don't. I've come to tell myself that you never felt anything for me, but deep down inside, I think you did. Even if it was for that split second. Now that we're leaving for college, separated by hundreds of miles, it's time to let you go. Sincerely, Your not-so-secret admirer
you know what, I don't usually comment on stuff like this but you nailed it here, one should realise that you are ALREADY complete we don't need other people to do that
I'm glad I found your channel ...sigh 7 month crush and on top of it he lives in another state 😔 what's wrong with me!!!! This is lasting way too long for me
This is spot on. Some of my worst heartbreaks were from guys who I almost dated, but didn’t. You would think they wouldn’t hurt as much as the end of a long term relationship, but somehow they do. Because you’re left thinking about what could of been and you have only good memories of your times with them.
I needed this so bad. We didn't date but he was so sweet. But always made excuses to not hang out. Now that I look more into it and turn the positive into the negatives it makes me get so over him. Lol! Thanks!!!!!!
sometimes I go back to old videos and put them on while I clean my house to see how you have evolved with time..how I have evolved as well haha..thanks!
I talked to a guy for over a year, we talked as if we were dating.. Then one day I couldn't handle it anymore cause I wanted a relationship and he didn't and I just stopped talking to him. It's been 9 months since I've talked to him, and he didn't even try and ask me what's wrong or why I stopped talking. That really broke my heart, but I'm starting to move on and I've met someone better who is actually trying to make an effort and come see me and who actually wants to do things with me. The guy who broke my heart never even tried to make plans with me... So I'm thankful for this new guy and I'm really trying to move past the old guy Things get better guys, even if it feels like they don't 🌈
I kinda in the same situation rn, he ghosted me for months but it made me realized he's not worth it bc he shows no efforts, I'm moving on with life and looking forward to the next gentleman.
I'm trying to get over someone at work but I keep hearing or being told by coworkers "oh he's such a nice guy" or he is so great or hes so kind followed by some story about something great he did. *sigh*😔
A lot of people are "nice" and get praised by everyone for their good deeds yet they're a devil in disguise. I've been sexually assaulted by one of those people, I should know. Of course I'm not saying that your dude is not actually a good person but you don't know that he is as well. Find a new fulfilling hobby, find your creative outlet, fill your time and if you can - travel. Travel the world and you'll see that this world has many hot, nice men to offer.
This is spot on. I “dated” a guy long-distanced and it took me super long to cut all ties with him over other men or even friends who were toxic because of the “story” of us. I wanted us to so desperately work out. LD he was cheating and full of drama. I wanted to have that “cocktail party” moment where I would say how we were LD, and we just knew and waited for each other.
This was actually amazing and exactly what I needed. I am going to listen to this again, especially the part about being complete on your own and not needing anyone else to complete you. That really resonates with me because I felt that this particular guy was giving me the happiness I couldn't find elsewhere and desperately needed. The way you explained it gave me a sense of peace even though I have been really upset by the whole situation. I felt weird searching youtube for this type of thing, but your video was exactly what I was looking for. Thank you for making it!!
Shallon thanks for constantly reminding us girls that we need to acknowledge our own responsibility in creating the life and relationships we want, you are awesome.
This is the truth. I’ve had a crush on this guy for so long. I took your advice and really started picturing us together as boyfriend and girlfriend. I would be unhappy long term. It might be fun at first but I would constantly be worried he’d be cheating on me and because of his job and popularity he is surrounded by women.
This is soooooo true, thank you for this! I got out of a ~real~ relationship recently and it was so easy getting over him, when I've taken YEARS getting over some guy I was barely even friends with. Xx
Great video! I saved it to my likes. I think one thing that we need to tell girls starting from a young age that they are COMPLETE and WHOLE without a partner. Too many women were raised to believe that their end goal in life should be to get married, have babies, etc in order to be a complete human being, and if they don’t, they’ll be lonely failures. This results in depression, jumping into loveless relationships, and a host of other problems. This is a horrible disservice to women. Boys and men need this advice too! Focus on loving yourself and feeling complete in yourself and view relationships as a nice perk, but not necessary for being complete, whole, and worthwhile. I know it’s horrible feeling lonely, but there are worse things than being single, trust me!
it's really nice to find a video that's exactly what you're looking for and feeling. You hit the nail right on the head, and you explained this so perfectly. I love it! Subscribed after the first 52 seconds, the beginning was explained so well.
“He didn’t like you” wouldn’t have gotten interested if he didn’t show it first. It’s a matter of missing how he liked in the beginning/wondering how true it all was. He didn’t like you would only make us feel worse
Holly crap I needed this THANK YOU! I work with this guy and I always thought/assumed he was with someone. But then (long story but to sum it up) I was told he was interested in going out with me, got my # from a friend and I was so excited because he was SO CUTE!!! Well...I waited for that phone call that never came. We even talked at work on occasions and nothing. He told me it was his last week working at where we work and then I found out TODAY that he is moving far away. Anyways....I was defiantly guilty of fantasying a relationship and how we would get along so good and all that crap. It's so hard to get people out of your head. Thanks again for the video!!!
As I am watching these vídeos.... Here I come: I thought you were the person who would make me feel Happy because, i didn't have real Friends at that time, that you would be that person Who would help me in difficult times but you know what, you make me Believe that because you needed that friend that always helps you un tour break ups and also because i thought you were going to fall in LOVE with me as you stupidly did with my friend. I WAS WRONG. I'm Happy because i'm learning that i don't need a half💕
I love that your videos are not long and always to the point. I'd probably watch you if they were 20 minutes long too but still, there are some dating advice channels that are actually good but I just can't stand watching for 15 minutes so I usually don't :D
I realized the reason I still can't let go because of my ego and self-esteem. I don't wana be with this person in the first place but because he chose another girl over me and tried to hide it and still asked me to hang out. My ego hurts! I cut him off for two months already but I still can't get over it!!!!!!!!
We are not all in middle school or high school so when referring to guys playing football or on a track team doesn't apply to us older woman!! Great advice!!💋
This is my life right now. It’s so hard to get over a crush because of the “what if?” Knowing you’d be perfect together and have so much in common. I swear I would of married my crush... if he knew I existed. It’s so sad. Honestly how I’m getting over it is to make a pros and cons chart. Sounds silly but it actually works. I saw I had more cons than pros and all the attributes I listed for pros like “tall” were mostly all physically because of course I don’t know anything else about him... which made me realize I could easily find those things in someone else, who is wayyy better and would never reject or play with my feelings. We deserve better, bottom line.
Im so happy i found this because i needed to here the tough love honestly because Im trying to stop liking a boy but its sooo harddd. This is helping me a lot.
He wasn't really nice, cute or smart, even though he thought he was. He simply was a part of my life when I was vulnerable. He seemed so interested in me. I felt special. Now I realize he had a girlfriend the whole time. He led me on and then cut me out. I'll probably look back on this and laugh but for now, I thank you for this video.
Glad I found this video ❤️thank you so much for your words.. I've been in there and something that helped me move on was realizing I never really liked him to begin with , I was after the cook tail fantasy lol😅 &you're strategy does work the moment I stepped out side the bubble to reality ..it was clear to me.
Girl Thank You!! I was really getting sad over this guy that I like and he actually likes me back but I know it won't work out so I want to forget him.
WOW Shallon thank you so much for this video. I've followed you for a long time and I always agree with everything you say but with this I'm RIGHT THERE WITH YA. I'm actually kinda dating a guy that broke my heart 3 months ago and I spent 2 months trying to forget him and I just couldn't because of all you've said. I had him as if he were some kind of flawless god. Then a month ago he said to me he really had missed me and we started smh that is actually going on right now. And if today he said to me: look, I don't wanna keep up with this... I don't like you blahblah, I'd get over him SO MUCH FASTER!!! Because I started over with him a month ago. I had been 2 months trying to hate him and I actually kinda did. So now when we are together I CAN SEE everything he does that I actually DON'T like. For example, he doesn't let me call him "honey" or stuff like that, which I would like to. I really like him now but I can OBJECTIVELY SEE his flaws and tho I like spending time with him (...)
... I would get over him so much faster because I know I'm a whole and I see that for the moment he's not going to be THE ONE. So yes, I AGREE 100%, I've suffered A LOT for boys that I haven't dated and thanks for reaffirming my theory that you can actually have a broken heart if you weren't dating him. THANKS AGAIN, I LOVE YOU 💘💘💘
It really is 10x harder to get over someone you never were official with simply because of the unknown of “what could of been”
I think it’s harder to get over someone you are/were in a proper relationship with. Crushes fade and start to become meaningless once you get over them but true love can take an eternity to move on from.
I wasn’t really in love with him, I was just in love of the idea of him.
Omg! It just hit me on so many levels. omg yass yesss exactly
Same
Me too! Lmaoooooo, I just loved the fact that he’s rich 😂😅 and has a Tesla
I relate
I was in love with him. Every one of them.
This just spoke to me on a spiritual level, almost like pizza.
How do you avoid being attracted to people who aren't attracted to you?
You don't date anyone who doesn't make their interest clear...but its easier for highly attractive people
@@shaniajackson7864 or you see/hang out with someone who seems clearly interested in you, sleep with them and then it changes all of a sudden, this is the worst scenario out there and mostly seems to happen to attractive women🙄
@@DanneyTanner I found nasty this thing of masturbation, becouse you get addicted to it, I understand your message though.
Dear crush,
You were the first and only guy in high school to make my heart skip a beat. Every time I heard your name my stomach would flutter with butterflies. I liked you for your playful, jokester ways...but when it came to my feelings, you should've stopped. But you didn't. I should hate you for that but I don't. I've come to tell myself that you never felt anything for me, but deep down inside, I think you did. Even if it was for that split second. Now that we're leaving for college, separated by hundreds of miles, it's time to let you go.
Sincerely,
Your not-so-secret admirer
Omgs same😂😅😭😭
Wow, I really need this.
+Chelsea Alsina Me too.
Ditto.
you know what, I don't usually comment on stuff like this but you nailed it here, one should realise that you are ALREADY complete we don't need other people to do that
I'm glad I found your channel ...sigh 7 month crush and on top of it he lives in another state 😔 what's wrong with me!!!! This is lasting way too long for me
i feel you girl! its the worst!
You're still a baby! You'll get over it
omg same
It's all in my head. He is just there doing his job and i was just there too .He didn't take time to check up on me.
-note to self
I'm pretty sure my crush liked me but I'm pretty sure he got over me but I'm too scared to ask him if he liked me
SAME THING WITH ME GIRL!!!!!!!
Me too!
I feel the same way...
this is helping me so much
This is spot on. Some of my worst heartbreaks were from guys who I almost dated, but didn’t. You would think they wouldn’t hurt as much as the end of a long term relationship, but somehow they do. Because you’re left thinking about what could of been and you have only good memories of your times with them.
I needed this so bad. We didn't date but he was so sweet. But always made excuses to not hang out. Now that I look more into it and turn the positive into the negatives it makes me get so over him. Lol! Thanks!!!!!!
sometimes I go back to old videos and put them on while I clean my house to see how you have evolved with time..how I have evolved as well haha..thanks!
When she said, got caught up in the story and not the reality 🙌🏽
I talked to a guy for over a year, we talked as if we were dating.. Then one day I couldn't handle it anymore cause I wanted a relationship and he didn't and I just stopped talking to him. It's been 9 months since I've talked to him, and he didn't even try and ask me what's wrong or why I stopped talking.
That really broke my heart, but I'm starting to move on and I've met someone better who is actually trying to make an effort and come see me and who actually wants to do things with me. The guy who broke my heart never even tried to make plans with me... So I'm thankful for this new guy and I'm really trying to move past the old guy
Things get better guys, even if it feels like they don't 🌈
I kinda in the same situation rn, he ghosted me for months but it made me realized he's not worth it bc he shows no efforts, I'm moving on with life and looking forward to the next gentleman.
I'm trying to get over someone at work but I keep hearing or being told by coworkers "oh he's such a nice guy" or he is so great or hes so kind followed by some story about something great he did. *sigh*😔
A lot of people are "nice" and get praised by everyone for their good deeds yet they're a devil in disguise. I've been sexually assaulted by one of those people, I should know. Of course I'm not saying that your dude is not actually a good person but you don't know that he is as well. Find a new fulfilling hobby, find your creative outlet, fill your time and if you can - travel. Travel the world and you'll see that this world has many hot, nice men to offer.
but he's my best friend 😩 but its cool I'll get over it...i hope.
I see so many comments in the section that I can relate to
Omg ive been waiting for this video my whole life. Thank you so much. Btw you are gorgeous 😍😍😍😍
You know what she's 110% right. Everything she says makes sense and this advice and video helped me so much
I can't stop looking at your hair... It's flawless!💁🏼
Loving the new background looks really professional! Love this video x
the only things that are flawless is a fresh well made pizza and your hair shallon! ❤
I totally agree with everything you said! Oh and you look gorgeous xoxo
This is spot on. I “dated” a guy long-distanced and it took me super long to cut all ties with him over other men or even friends who were toxic because of the “story” of us. I wanted us to so desperately work out. LD he was cheating and full of drama. I wanted to have that “cocktail party” moment where I would say how we were LD, and we just knew and waited for each other.
This was actually amazing and exactly what I needed. I am going to listen to this again, especially the part about being complete on your own and not needing anyone else to complete you. That really resonates with me because I felt that this particular guy was giving me the happiness I couldn't find elsewhere and desperately needed. The way you explained it gave me a sense of peace even though I have been really upset by the whole situation. I felt weird searching youtube for this type of thing, but your video was exactly what I was looking for. Thank you for making it!!
Can't believe you made this video exactly WHEN I'm in this situation. Amazing, that's a sign. Thank you so much I love you !! xx
Who this lady she's on point with this best video
Shallon thanks for constantly reminding us girls that we need to acknowledge our own responsibility in creating the life and relationships we want, you are awesome.
Oh, woman... how many broken hearts you have helped to heal with your videos... thank you, Shallon.
MY FAVORITE ADIVCE GIVER EVER 😭😭💗
This is the truth. I’ve had a crush on this guy for so long. I took your advice and really started picturing us together as boyfriend and girlfriend. I would be unhappy long term. It might be fun at first but I would constantly be worried he’d be cheating on me and because of his job and popularity he is surrounded by women.
OMG, THE COCKTAIL PARTY WAS EXACTLY MY PROBLEM!
I REALYYY NEEDED TO HEAR THIS. THANKS
This is soooooo true, thank you for this! I got out of a ~real~ relationship recently and it was so easy getting over him, when I've taken YEARS getting over some guy I was barely even friends with. Xx
Glad I had enough courage to look this up , I needed to hear this and from this I will stand strong. thank you so much.
Great video! I saved it to my likes. I think one thing that we need to tell girls starting from a young age that they are COMPLETE and WHOLE without a partner. Too many women were raised to believe that their end goal in life should be to get married, have babies, etc in order to be a complete human being, and if they don’t, they’ll be lonely failures. This results in depression, jumping into loveless relationships, and a host of other problems. This is a horrible disservice to women. Boys and men need this advice too! Focus on loving yourself and feeling complete in yourself and view relationships as a nice perk, but not necessary for being complete, whole, and worthwhile. I know it’s horrible feeling lonely, but there are worse things than being single, trust me!
it's really nice to find a video that's exactly what you're looking for and feeling. You hit the nail right on the head, and you explained this so perfectly. I love it! Subscribed after the first 52 seconds, the beginning was explained so well.
“He didn’t like you” wouldn’t have gotten interested if he didn’t show it first. It’s a matter of missing how he liked in the beginning/wondering how true it all was. He didn’t like you would only make us feel worse
couldn't have run into this at a more appropriate time thank you
Thank you so much, this video is exactly what I needed tonight
Wow. This really helped me a lot, so grateful .
Had this happen to me. So annoying. Usually it's just wanting a relationship rather than wanting that person.
I love shallon because she’s so brutal, puts me in my place and makes me feel so strong! I needed this
Holly crap I needed this THANK YOU! I work with this guy and I always thought/assumed he was with someone. But then (long story but to sum it up) I was told he was interested in going out with me, got my # from a friend and I was so excited because he was SO CUTE!!! Well...I waited for that phone call that never came. We even talked at work on occasions and nothing. He told me it was his last week working at where we work and then I found out TODAY that he is moving far away. Anyways....I was defiantly guilty of fantasying a relationship and how we would get along so good and all that crap. It's so hard to get people out of your head. Thanks again for the video!!!
As I am watching these vídeos.... Here I come: I thought you were the person who would make me feel Happy because, i didn't have real Friends at that time, that you would be that person Who would help me in difficult times but you know what, you make me Believe that because you needed that friend that always helps you un tour break ups and also because i thought you were going to fall in LOVE with me as you stupidly did with my friend. I WAS WRONG.
I'm Happy because i'm learning that i don't need a half💕
Omg thank you! You have shed so much light on my situation, you make it seem so simple when I felt like it was so complicated!
I really need to watch this video 24/7 since it got out just to remind me how much of a DOUCHE that guy is. Thank you, Shallon.
I love that your videos are not long and always to the point. I'd probably watch you if they were 20 minutes long too but still, there are some dating advice channels that are actually good but I just can't stand watching for 15 minutes so I usually don't :D
I really did need this this makes me feel better thank you ❤️
Girl I am with you !!! You are speaking the truth !!!
this is probably the most helpful video I've ever seen, thank you so much i really needed to hear this.
so helpful! thank you!!
I realized the reason I still can't let go because of my ego and self-esteem. I don't wana be with this person in the first place but because he chose another girl over me and tried to hide it and still asked me to hang out. My ego hurts! I cut him off for two months already but I still can't get over it!!!!!!!!
Same situation:(
We are not all in middle school or high school so when referring to guys playing football or on a track team doesn't apply to us older woman!! Great advice!!💋
Omg this is exaaaaaactly what's happening! I needed this, totally subscribed 😊
Thank you for this. Your advice really gave me perspective and helped me let him go easier.
Every time i have had to get over someone (which is a lot) i watch this video. IT ALWAYS. HELPS.
If you want to heal from this then, take responsibility for it otherwise your gonna repeat it and become you hate.
This video fed my soul, this is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you Shallon!
right before i watched this i was crying over someone but this really put things into perspective
I wish I saw this video a long time ago. Thank you, it is so insightful and genuinely explains so much x
Thank you. I was this close to ending it all so thank you for taking the time to make this video.
thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you I NEEDED THIS
You have no idea how much I needed this.. Thank you so much
this is excellent advice and just what I need right now. thank you!
This is my life right now. It’s so hard to get over a crush because of the “what if?” Knowing you’d be perfect together and have so much in common. I swear I would of married my crush... if he knew I existed. It’s so sad. Honestly how I’m getting over it is to make a pros and cons chart. Sounds silly but it actually works. I saw I had more cons than pros and all the attributes I listed for pros like “tall” were mostly all physically because of course I don’t know anything else about him... which made me realize I could easily find those things in someone else, who is wayyy better and would never reject or play with my feelings. We deserve better, bottom line.
You're so amazingly wise Shallon!
Hey Shallon! You look really good in this video! I love the new hair colour and lipstick💖
Thank you so much!! I really needed to hear this.
I literally love shallon. I wish it knew these things a long time ago 💕
Im so happy i found this because i needed to here the tough love honestly because Im trying to stop liking a boy but its sooo harddd. This is helping me a lot.
I've never related so much to a video, wow was just what i needed thank you ❤️
good advice, thanks for posting the video
I really needed this.. So glad this was here for me!
this was sooooo helpful i am really grateful i found this video thank u so much 💕
Hey Shallon!! I love your videos and have been watching them for years. Your amazing
He wasn't really nice, cute or smart, even though he thought he was. He simply was a part of my life when I was vulnerable. He seemed so interested in me. I felt special. Now I realize he had a girlfriend the whole time. He led me on and then cut me out. I'll probably look back on this and laugh but for now, I thank you for this video.
ughh i loveeee this, THANK YOU. btw you look gorGEOUS !!!
lighting, set and quality is getting better! yaaaaay :)
omg this was really helpful..thank you a lot for this video❤
This is truth for guys or gals. It sucks when you're not 100% and you find yourself in an almost relationship.
i love you so much shallon! needed to hear this...
Wow, this actually really helped me, thanks so much!
this video was definitely for me... thank you!
Omg I absolutely love love love you u are so right everything u say that I've tried works, thanks so much for sharing!!! Xxxx
Loved this it’s like you got inside of my mind.
just perfect
love the new look the new background
love shallon from greece..!!
This honestly really helps !! Ty so much !!
Glad I found this video ❤️thank you so much for your words.. I've been in there and something that helped me move on was realizing I never really liked him to begin with , I was after the cook tail fantasy lol😅 &you're strategy does work the moment I stepped out side the bubble to reality ..it was clear to me.
Needed this so bad today. Thank you so much
I love this quality, and you look beauteous in this video!! I totally needed this...
Such a good and necessary video 😊 Thanks!
This helped me so much Thankyou I just subscribed 💜💜
You are The Queen of dating, fantastic 👍 advice 😊💯thanks
Girl Thank You!! I was really getting sad over this guy that I like and he actually likes me back but I know it won't work out so I want to forget him.
Omfg!!! U r fuckin amazing!! I tried soo many times to get over a crush by watching videos but it didn't help!!! This did!!! Thank u!!!
WOW Shallon thank you so much for this video. I've followed you for a long time and I always agree with everything you say but with this I'm RIGHT THERE WITH YA. I'm actually kinda dating a guy that broke my heart 3 months ago and I spent 2 months trying to forget him and I just couldn't because of all you've said. I had him as if he were some kind of flawless god. Then a month ago he said to me he really had missed me and we started smh that is actually going on right now. And if today he said to me: look, I don't wanna keep up with this... I don't like you blahblah, I'd get over him SO MUCH FASTER!!! Because I started over with him a month ago. I had been 2 months trying to hate him and I actually kinda did. So now when we are together I CAN SEE everything he does that I actually DON'T like. For example, he doesn't let me call him "honey" or stuff like that, which I would like to. I really like him now but I can OBJECTIVELY SEE his flaws and tho I like spending time with him (...)
... I would get over him so much faster because I know I'm a whole and I see that for the moment he's not going to be THE ONE. So yes, I AGREE 100%, I've suffered A LOT for boys that I haven't dated and thanks for reaffirming my theory that you can actually have a broken heart if you weren't dating him. THANKS AGAIN, I LOVE YOU 💘💘💘
i love this background, and video quality
silver still perf
awww i really love this and needed this !!! thanks 😘😘