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You'd be floored that some of us DO understand about toxic mother/daughter situations; hence no details are needed. I know how difficult it has to be to fight your way to a healthy place but keep fighting. Proud of you!
This is your journey and you owe us no explanation. I will pray for family unity, however, I will also pray for your strength and peace as you develop a strong family with your husband and kids. Sometimes putting the toxic person in a "circle" is your only form of protection and growth for yourself. Love your mother and allow yourself to keep her in the emotional circle she has created. You continue to move forward and love her where she is and in the manner you can. If it's thru prayer only then that's what it is. Love to you, your sisters, and your other family members! All things work for the good...
Vaughn, you've been through so much this past decade. So many highs and lows. As a viewer this is one of the first times I've seen the weight of life lifted off of you. You truly seem to be in a better place and that makes me so happy for you. Keep putting yourself first. You're worth it. Congrats to Anne! You all looked adorable in your white outfits.
Vaughn, please don't be so hard on yourself! You are a wonderful parent and always go above and beyond for your family! That's why God chose you. Don't ever doubt your parenting decisions you go hard every time! Kudos mama🥰 As far as the locs are concerned, you use very good products that are residue free and you have a great wash schedule/routine. Keep up the good work!
It’s been 2 years since I had to cut my Mother out of my life. I couldn’t take the toxicity anymore I chose me. I don’t miss the drama, I’m so at peace. My energy is for my Husband & Children. I love the patio it’s giving resort vibe
I could not grab my phone fast enough to COMMEMD your bravery and courage!!! I do NOT know your specific situation and totally applaud your wisdom in NOT sharing. I agree 1000% with EVERYTHING u stated about how we perceive mothers. THANK YOU Vaughn. I have shared your sentiments for YEARS and have NEVER heard anyone who literally has seen the horrors that mothers inflict on their children. Children can be the victims of abuse from their mothers too! I believe you Vaughn and I pray u continue to do what’s necessary for your continued healing, recovery and emotional safety. ❤
I can relate to your mother issue and others' response to it. Someone very close to me sent me the book, "Mother Hunger", and it was a good step in allowing me to understand how the trauma affected me and how I can move forward. I'd also recommend this book for those who can't fully understand the deep wounds of an abusive mother/ daughter relationship! Sending peace your way! ✌🏾💚✨
Ms Vaughn, I can't say that I had the same experience with my mom, but i truly understand. Just because someone shares the same blood or has birthed you does not mean you have to take any type of mistreatment. I understand how society puts mothers on a pedestal but all mothers aren't created equal. Love her from a distance.
So my daughter (12) asked me how you were doing. She said it like she was asking about a family member. I just realized she has grown up watching me watch you. It was so sweet.
Very well said Mrs.Vaughn I’m a long time subscriber and I have never commented but, I too am a Chicagoan raised in the projects in the 70’s. But I agree, I experienced my trauma at the age of 10 years old and I know you can imagine what it is at that young age. And now I’m 59 years old going to therapy while the abuser goes on with their life as normal. and situation as such people tend to just look over or think it’s not a problem. This is the reason why we continue to carry generational trauma. Sorry for the long conversation, but I love your Vlogs and I had to speak on this sensitive topic. ❤
Vaughn, the way you nurture your kids and treat other people says a lot about who you are. You exude patience and pure kindness, so just know that if you choose you to be happy, do not apologize for it. I know it’s hard because that is your mother, but remember just because you have chosen not to deal with her on a day to day basis does not mean that she is still not a apart of your heart. So the way you have decided to handle the situation is for your peace and a sound mind….so have no worries. May the love of the LORD JESUS CHRIST rest bountifully on your soul. Love you ❤ much!
First of all, CONGRATULATIONS, Anne!! As I sit here listening to you talk about your experiences with your mom, I am actually tearful. When I say no one believes me in regards to the things I've experienced with my mom in my 43 years. Whew. So I say kudos to you for doing what you needed to do for you. You are so right. There is a zero tolerance attitude when it comes to abuse, with the exception of when it comes from mothers. I think this is because the brain has a very hard time processing that type of experience and also because the abusive mothers tend to be creative in their execution. Keep on growing, living, and enjoying your best life!
I appreciate everything you said in reference to your relationship with your mom. I have experienced the same with mine, I had to distance myself from her as well. Physical, verbal and emotional abuse was all I got from her. At 18 and pregnant she put me out and told me to never ask her for anything. I had only been living with her from the age of 14 when she first beat me with an extension cord. I am now 61 and she is 75 dealing with health issues and the rest of the family feels that I should be taking care of her, ABSOLUTELY NOT! To be subjected to more abuse after finally finding my peace, I will not. So I appreciate you! Thank you for standing your ground!🎉❤
1. Anne makes my day every time 2. I can totally relate to what you are experiencing with your mother. So much so that sometimes I envy those who have close mother daughter relationships because I’ve never had it. 3. Youth to the people..Moisturizer Yes!!
Hi Vaughn. I am one of those long term subscribers that have been watching from before you were married. Ive never commented but felt an urge to do so after watching this video. You absolutely have the right to only show us what you want us to see. But there are many of us that have experience with toxic/narcissistic people in our lives, including mothers. You are not alone and we would absolutely believe you. Wishing you all the best.
I recently went no contact with my own mother and listening to you definitely resonated with me. I agree with all that you said. I feel understood and heard listening to you. Thank you so much for that. Not everyone understands what it’s like deciding to cut contact with a family member. ❤ Sending you positive energy and hugs. 🥰 Congratulations Anne!! 🎉 What a big achievement 🌟
I just love Anne’s personality. She be low key shady 😂. Hearing you express your truth regarding family relationships and invalidation, made me feel like my husband and I were seen. We’ve gone through it and people just can’t fathom the enforced boundaries. It’s truly taxing.
Girl you ain’t gotta explain. I’ve never experienced your situation, but I’ve worked with kids who have toxic mom /daughter relationships. I’m happy you have a good support system.
I’m so glad you have your dad to take up the slack of parenthood. Your dad is awesome. Out of all the times I’ve seen him on your channel. So thank God for him.
As I get older Ive realized people have a hard time taking accountability for there actions. Everyone likes to play the blame game instead of owning up to there wrong doing. So many relationships could be repaired just from taking accountability and actually taking steps to change moving forward. Congrats to Ann and your family, I enjoy seeing her growth.
Congratulations to Annie boo on her graduation 🎉 As for the dynamic with your mom. There’s some people that will believe it for sure. Because believe it or not some have gone through similar unspoken things. So without knowing and needing to know the way that you expressed yourself I believe whatever the issue is that you’re saying without knowing. It’s like the pain, tone, and look in your eyes says a lot without saying it. I feel you deeply. I too have had that same expression before. ♥️ In society especially the black community we’re taught to honor our mother and our father and our days on earth will be longer. But today and moving forward so many of us is braking the mix up people have used with that statement. We are regaining our right, our peace, our life. Remember there will be folks that won’t understand and that’s on them but you’re not alone. I don’t believe most scenarios that exist in life only happens to one person so know some of us feel you without you having to say a word. Do what’s best for you and yours. I’m happy therapy is helpful and continue to break generational curses.
My hat goes off to you Vaughn. You are such a great mom to Anne. Your love and patience is apparent in all your videos but especially this one. When days get tough. You ALWAYS remember your story is helping many others including me.🙌🏽😊
Allow yourself some grace. Also, give us some grace. Speaking for me, I only follow/subscribe influencers that I admire or relate to. I don't have kids, but I can relate to so many other things you post. WE will believe you! But you do not have to share. I respect your privacy and as someone said earlier, this is your journey ❤. We are here for you! I have a twin sister that has absolutely drained the effing life out of me. At 50 years old (51 now) I decided to end my relationship with her. So I 100% understand
I am going to continue to pray for you and your family. I’m kinda going through a situation with my daughter. She is 25 & we have ALWAYS been EXTREMELY close. But in the past 2 years she’s been in situation with a male friend that his completely changed her. It has made our relationship significantly deteriorate. I love her and I know she loves me but we just have to go through this tough season and I know things will eventually mend. She has been one of my best-friends & it’s been tough not being as close but I will continue to pray that the lord brings us out of this storm.
Anne is such a pretty little girl. And she has perfected the art of stalling getting that hair washed. But being the amazing mother that you are, you patiently waited her out and got it done.😊 Her hair is really growing, and you're doing a great job with it. And by the way, I completely believe you. When you know, you know.❤
With my mom, I had to cut ties with her as well. My mom was an alcoholic and it was also the cause of her death. She would say and do things that were unacceptable. I had to put me and my mental health first. It's crazy toward the end, she had to move in with my grandma and I. We didn't know she was dying. Yes, we still butted heads....lol We had a whole yr of every last everything. You have to do what is right for you and your family. Many blessings...❤ 🙏🏽
Vaughn…girl, I just love your realness. First let me congratulate Anne! I know the other internet aunties can agree that we are so proud of her. It’s truly such a beautiful blessing to see her progress. Thank you for continuing to share and teach us. I must admit, I was cracking up at her sitting in that chair with the robe and hat on eating snacks trying her best to literally be unbothered. 😂 She looked like such a big kid in her splash outfit and her sunnies. 🥹 Lastly, I COMPLETELY empathize on the family situation. I hate that people won’t drop it because honestly it’s none of our business. I appreciate you sharing simply because I believe it does help people gain other perspectives for similar situations but at the end of the day, even if we’ve watched every vlog, we DON’T actually know you or your family and what you’ve gone through.
Your relationship with your Mom is nobody’s business. I pray for healing for you and your family. You are not required to deal with someone’s toxicity simply because they’re family and you have the right to have boundaries.
Everything you said regarding your Mom sound so similiar to my relationship with mine. She have everyone fooled thinking she's a sweet church lady but in reality she's toxic asf and not a good person. I'm still unpacking so much trauma from my childhood and beyond. Folks like to say "you only get 1 Mother" but she only get 1 me too. I'm just as important and deserving of love. Protect your peace. These folks that cannot relate to having to cut their Mom off need to read the room and stfu. The onus shouldnt always be on the wronged to fix a relationship.
Thank you Vaughn. I had an abusive relationship with my mom and I have told my truth and folks thought I am lying still. My mother died and all I felt was relief. I have A LOT of therapy to do. I also live in the house where all the years of abuse occurred but it’s process. I don’t need to know the details. I BELIEVE YOU and support the decisions that you make to preserve YOU 💛💛
You are so on point when talking about moms being able to do what they want. People have got to stop that narrative that if you don’t have a good relationship with your mom it’s something that you have done. Just because you have a great relationship with your mom doesn’t mean we are wrong or hateful because we don’t. We have the right to say we don’t want to mistreated! Period! If you get it you get it, if you don’t keep it on mute. Respectfully
You do not owe anyone an explanation for anything. It's your channel, and you have invited us into your home and you have the right to share or not. Who are these people? God bless you beautiful family and please don't let the negative comments get to you. Stay healthy and whole both physically, mentally and spiritually.
Thank you so much, Vauhn, for confirming that I am not crazy. I no longer discuss issues regarding my mom with family or friends because they don't understand or think I'm exaggerating the situation. Blessing to you and your beautiful family❤
I love what you said about how folks feel like death is the reason you should make up with someone! My father has MS and I don’t have a huge relationship with him because of how he acts, and I’ve always heard “you’ll be sorry about this when he dies” and I could never understand why that was the end all, be all. Thank you for sharing, seriously.
As someone who has a very difficult relationship with my mother, (and had to distance myself for my and my family’s health), I want to send your speech to everyone on my mother’s side of the family😂 When I say it’s difficult enough processing my own feelings on the situation without everyone constantly telling ME, the child, to mend the relationship. It’s so unfair. Being a parent has only made it more clear that I would never do some of the things she’s done. And I do the work to ensure I don’t fall into her habits. Thank you for sharing what you were comfortable sharing. It helps to hear from someone who understands ❤
Girl your mom is my mom. I been there. I even moved across the country because of the mother/daughter relationship. It’s unfortunate but we have to do what needs to be done to keep our peace.
Honoring your mother can definitely be done from afar! Realizing when to remove yourself from an abusive or toxic person is so important to sustain emotional well being! Thanks for sharing Vaughn💛.
I’ve always admired the way you articulate your feelings and your ability to offer another perspective on different topics. Your take on mothers and how they’re often impervious to accountability was spot on. Real food for thought.
I really hope through prayer and therapy that you all could come to some middle ground she might not be the mother you needed but she might be the grandmother Anne and Ava would love ❤️
Hi! What you stated about death was spot on. I have felt the same way about this issue for years. When I cut off some of my family members, and some in-laws too, I ignored everyone who tried to press/guilt me into restarting those relationships. I didn’t look back. I felt no guilt. And my life was greatly improved - especially my sanity. Btw, both my mother and mother-in-law (who never met each other) have since died. At some point, you just gotta quit. I have no regrets.
Hey Vaughn, I do understand what you are dealing with. I will continue to pray for you and your mom. Stay encouraged 🌹 PS: Congratulations to Anne on graduating to 1st grade. She is making so much progress. You have the patience of Job. Don’t ever sell yourself short…you are a phenomenal mom❤️
Liissttteennn… I don’t know and don’t NEED to know the details… BUT… if you ever start a support group for daughters with “unhealthy” / toxic relationships with their mothers… I would attend. I wish you the best ! Thanks for always giving us such great content!
Vaughn thx for your transparency and I 1000% agree with you. Unless someone experiences estrangement from a mother due to abuse it can be difficult to understand. My mom and I are 9 yrs estranged and even when I talk to my husband of 17 yrs about the things I went through and even things he’s witnessed he’s still in disbelief. And for me personally as a 40 yr old mom of 4 of whom 2 are girls, the part no one ever thinks about is how it affects you when you’re a grown woman with kids doing therapy to heal from both childhood and adulthood trauma from your mother while also trying to create a emotionally safe relationship with your own daughters.
Hello Vaughn, I hear you on motherhood (or any relationship). If you think about it -- whether it is domestic violence or sexual abuse or emotional abuse/estrangement -- the rule is that the victim must forgive or tolerate that kind of toxicity. The answer to that is NO. There comes a point when you have to value yourself more. Know that you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. Of course, I don't know the details of your situation (rightfully so), I support your right to heal and remove yourself from it.
I have had similar experiences. I recognized some behaviors in your vids in real time. I pray that you receive the healing you deserve. You and your sisters have turned out to be phenomenal women!
First, Congratulations Anne!! And Congratulations to you and Anthony as well!! ❤❤❤ Thank you for embracing all of yourself, your journey as a mother, daughter, sister, wife and sharing with us in such an open, honest and caring way. May God’s blessings of peace, healing, wisdom, love, forgiveness and grace cover you and your family!! It takes courage and strength to recognize the need for and to prioritize your own emotional health and wellbeing and also to set boundaries and or remove toxic relationships from your life. It is very difficult but oftentimes very necessary. Grace and peace to you Vaughn!! ❤️🙏🏽
Thank you for sharing your struggle. At times I feel alone with the pain and toxic relationship I have with my mother… I feel like we need a support group “ surviving a toxic mother” as a social worker , over the years I’ve tried to have empathy for her knowing … she also was someone daughter and experienced the same… but it’s hard because if you know better you do better.. and she hasn’t .. at this point… I’m praying for all daughters that are healing from this trauma ❤
Stay strong in your journey. I’ve gone no contact with my mother’s sister and I’ve had to constantly literally go off on my mama and her siblings about it.
Thank you so much for sharing your journey. There are so many of us out here that are navigating difficult mother daughter bonds and it is not easy to share or even be acknowledged. But you are seen and I hope you know your words are helping others feel seen as well. I wish you and your family so much peace and happiness ❤.
Sad about the mom situation, I remembered one of the past vlogs with her, and I thought she might have some anxiety issues with bipolar disorder. If that is the sit,hopefully she gets help.❤
Vaughn, one of the reasons why I’ve been supporting your content for so long is because of your realness and authenticity. You sharing your reasons on why you’re not sharing the details on the fall out with your mother was so real. I am one who pondered what could have happened between yall but I acknowledged to myself that it’s really none of my business. What you said brought me back to my thoughts on a friend of mine and her relationship with her mother. When she explained to me how she felt I couldn’t comprehend it because I lost my mother at a young age and I thought to myself like how could you! I later told her my thoughts and apologized to her. I understand how easy it is to project our thoughts and feelings on someone else’s life or relationships and that is not good. Thank you for that reality check again and I’m sending you my love 🫶🏾
Ann is getting so big! When I 1st started watching you, I think Ann was 3 going on 4. She has come such a very long way; I believe with all my heart Ann is going to talk in full sentences as she gets older. Vaughn, you & Anthony are such great parents to both of your children. And Sansa too! In your last Vlog I didn't mention anything about your mom. Because I have been where you are at, & it's none of my business. My mom has gone on to her glory now, & I believe wholeheartedly that the Lord has told her the errors of her ways. I feel that in my heart, & I'm at peace with the situation. Love you Vaughn & your family!
I know one thing... the Anneburger is a whole vibe... she's cool people. Sitting there with the hat on cracked me up! Remember that time she said... are you done with my hair?!! 😱 You had gotten on her laaast nerve!! 😂 This time she was like... lights out ma'am, we're DONE here! 😅
You would be surprise that what you are going through with your mother is not surprising, you can only make yourself happy and the only way is to be true to yourself, if your not happy and healthy than your no good to your daughters, happy for Ms Ann graduating what a big girl she is and so is the baby what a sweety, lol.
Listen your experience is real and none of us can and or should judge or insert our opinions on YOUR experience. Thank you for even sharing this because you didn’t have to. 💛💙
"You are not going to believe me." You better say that. People do not understand, empathize, etc. It's not even worth discussing details with people who haven't lived it. You said it perfectly. I have the same perspective with my mother. I respect her, and that respect can coexist with my need to protect and guard my self-worth and peace.
Hey Vaughn, Have you tried turning wash day into an experience for her? Maybe a small projector in bathroom and a lot of water toys , water colors or something? Idk just thinking. ❤
Boy boy boy boy boy!! You’ve articulated the “toxic mother” segment so very well!! Like took all my thoughts and verbalized them so perfectly. Like I’m almost in tears because this is exactly it!!!! I could go on and on, but you said it ma’am! 😢
A lot of women can relate to you more than you know, Vaughn, when it comes to the mother daughter dynamic. In the Black community, we were conditioned to keep things private, accept any kind of treatment from family including parents. Even as adults, the crossing of boundaries, not being respected as a grown woman, not considering your feelings and so forth. We understand and this internet is forever so share as little as you want to share. If anything, the tidbit of information you shared has helped a lot of women to not feel alone. Just that tidbit of information was enough. You have two daughters and they will be better women because you chose to do things differently for yourself and them. ❤
The one thing I love about you is when you share your feelings and walk away. I cannot imagine and I can’t even try to imagine but I understand. Thanks for your transparency ❤
I appreciate everything you've said around your relationships your mother and everything you haven't said. I can understand. In our community, a lot of us cant fathom cutting parents, in particular mothers, off because of unhealthy behaviors and boundary crossing. However, I notice more and more mental health professionals publicly supporting these discussions around this scenario and providing insight on how to handle it for ones own self-preservation and care.
Also like to add that was a good point you made about the possibility of death occurring a person should still endure the abuse albeit physical, emotional, verbal, etc. Death is gonna occur anyway and no one should have to endure any type of abuse from an abuser...going thru the same with my granddad. .had to cut him off after so many years. .it's sad
Vaughn, thank you for sharing! I am so with you! What I don’t know I don’t comment on but goodness, the way you spoke on that was classy and honestly words I’ve said forever! Relationships are so complicated and we need to stop pushing people to endure what we don’t know first hand! The babies are beautiful, you’re beautiful and doing a good job mama and we are here for it! Blessings to you!
I completely understand the disconnect between mother and daughter.. I experienced it for many years. Now that I have removed myself from the toxicity, I feel relief, but there are days that I feel pain, because I never received the closure/ truth that I once longed for.
I appreciate your channel because I'm a god-mother to a sweet baby girl with special needs. I learn so much from you and I'm constantly sharing with the child's mother. I want to learn as much as I can and it's good to learn from all facets. You're doing an amazing job, keep up the great work.
Vaughn I’m truly sorry you have to go through this with your mom. I’m also happy you sought help. I’ve been dealing with horrible relationship w/ my mother ever since I was a child. I thank my grandparents for coming to my aid and taking me away from the toxic environment. At 56, I am absolutely at peace with my limited relationship I have w/ my mother. You’re definitely right about the double standards of moms getting away with abusive behavior toward their children. Keeping you in my prayers.
Love your vlogs and 🥳 🎉congratulations to Anne. I got the ‘do not ask me for anything ever’ from my father towards me and my child. He was close with the other kids but for some reason not me. Everything I did was ridiculed. And when he died I felt no different. No grief. I just say bye and left it. I have a relationship with my mother and am grateful but I guess not as close as I could be. I feel she has her favorites. So I leave it where it is and respect what I get. I’ve seen relationships not so great with friends and their mothers so I understand and I commend you. Do what you have to. ❤
Vaughn!! Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and memorable time in your family’s life. I’m so happy and proud of your (our! lol) sweet Anne..she’s like my internet niece. I’ve been a subscriber since 2012, when I was finally done chopping /transitioning my crown. You and Meechy were my GURUS, PERIOD! I am so happy that you unapologetically chose to prioritize your mental and emotional well-being, even though I am sure it was gut-wrenching decision to make. I pray that you are moving toward absolute peace and healing. I also pray that your mom is working on her own mental and emotional health, with accountability as the driving force for her healing. Sometimes loving someone means deciding to no longer trauma bond with them. Familiarity and “routine” can mask itself as “normal”. It is not….❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I applaud you for having the strength and courage to stand up for yourself? You have to continue to choose peace of mind, as you are a mother, wife, and daughter.... your dad loves you and your sisters.
Oh Vaughn, I love your channel and rarely comment , but I had to-- on how Anne came to soothe you at 30:09 . Just so precious. My son does this to me too, and its always so subtle and quick like Anne did. A reminder of how smart and in tune to their mamas they are. But its always a quick lil gesture and back to their business they go haha FYI I am binge watching your channels to help pull me out of a deep funk . I love it here lol
So proud of your courage and you also talking to us about your situation with your mom a lot of us didn’t feel that we had anyone to tell or felt like we were going through this alone. I’m so happy that I’m on your page and you encourage other women to find peace when not having a relationship with anyone that’s toxic
Hey Vaughn, I just want to be supportive of whatever you have endured as far as family matters. I'm proud of you for taking care of yourself and getting the help that you need. Everything that happens in your life doesn't have to be exposed and you are very brave just to share what you shared. Keep striving to be the best that you can be and going over and beyond for your husband and children!
Honestly in my opinion it's no one's business as to what happened between you and your mom...I understand people asking the question because she used to be in your blogs and now she isn't but sharing details is no ones business and I can't fathom why a person would think you would share details. I wish you and your family the best! Also, Anne's hair has really grown and congratulations on her graduating I know u all are proud 🎉❤
I have a really good relationship with my Mom, BUT I fully understand that family can be toxic and their lives can impact you in very real ways. I applaud you and your ability to do what is best for you and your best mental health. I appreciate you sharing and I'm happy that you have therapy to process al the things. I love that you and your sisters have each other and your Dad is the GOAT!! Love your family and your blogs!
I am so proud of you. You are correct on not sharing all of your business. Care for her and know your boundaries to protect your immediate family. Proud of you being able to speak your truth.
Vaughn, I encourage whatever decision you’ve made for self preservation within your family. No questions asked. Congrats to Miss Annie on her graduation! I felt like a proud Auntie watching the reels.😍
I appreciate your boundaries and sharing what you feel comfortable to share. I would hate to live thru a tough situation and have others who know nothing about you to give unwanted opinions and pass judgment. I'm happy to go along with the ride. 🙏🏽
I think I understand the situation with your mother, simply because I no longer go into explaining my own mother as the perceptions of others can feel so invalidating. I've had to go no contact with my mom after trying to reconcile but that reconnection was heavy effort on my part and I ended up in a worse state so decided to go no contact again. Your talk about the onus being on us daughters as accepting abuse is something I still encounter from others but they don't know what I've been through. It's no easy feat cutting off your mother amd we don't do it for flimsy reasons that can be easily reconciled. I love and enjoy your vlogs especially as I'm estranged from my own family, it's nice to see and watch your family dynamics especially when you all get together. Well done Anne, congratulations for graduating!!
For the first time in a long time I felt the need to respond. And although I know you believe that your relationship with your mom is unique and no one could relate; I honestly believe that there are many more black women out here that can both relate and raise their hands and say "we are or have had to go through this also." I still am proud of you for taking the steps to make sure that you break the cycle of abuse (which sometimes is extremely hard), and not allowing yourself to get abused as an adult. And it hurts so bad to have to cut off a parent but it hits different during certain holidays especially Mothers Day.
Hey Vaughn. Your patio turned out beautiful. The pieces from Wayfair are such a vibe. The love you put into your home inside and out for your family is heartfelt 🤎🏡 Congrats to Anne! 👌🏽🙌🏽👏🏽 So happy for all of Anne's accomplishments big, small and all things in between! 🩷🤎 Ava, so precious and sweet. Too cute for words 🎀🩰🩷🤎 Vaughn, I hear you and respect you. As a long time subscriber, I am here to support you and thank you for sharing. I DO understand you personally as I had to remove my father from my life going on 24 years this year. It has been for the better for me. You need not feel compelled to explain to anyone. All family situations are different and we live our truth protecting ourselves from toxicity whether it be a parent, a sibling, anyone. I sure do appreciate the sit down and putting into your own words what I can honestly relate to. All that said, I wish you continued love and blessings for you and your family. Hugs from NY 🤗
I can relate to your experience with your mom. I have watched you for years. You are a phenomenal woman and mother. Trust me I know what you mean with your mother. I went through hell with mine and never shared it with most people. I just relocated in 2006 and barely speak to her. I definitely dealt with people saying you only have one mom, etc. After much therapy I learned that my decision to release that expectation of a better relationship, support or a true mother/daughter relationship was the healthiest choice. I promise you I understand. Please know that you are not alone. Love your Channel 💕
Dealing with a fractured relationship with a family member is tough especially when it’s someone from what I call the “core unit”. My mother was sick unable to speak from my birth until she died. For that reason even though not her fault I had abandonment issues which I am now dealing with in therapy. Through going therapy I have realized I was holding on to toxic people because they were apart of my “core”. It’s hard enough making the step to cut them off for your mental health and then have to hear family members opinions on it. I am sending you nothing about positive energy, you are doing what’s right for you and ultimately your family. Thank you for sharing with us.
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Vaughn, are you going to hit Wayfair brick & motor in Wilmette?
@@donnamosley7658 yes I am lol
I am already a fan and avid at that of Wayfair. Not sure. 🤔 But I may have gotten introduced to them by you way back when. They are my first choice when looking for that special piece of furniture needed to complete my decor and at a reasonable price. That’s what keeps me coming back. So thank you!
You'd be floored that some of us DO understand about toxic mother/daughter situations; hence no details are needed. I know how difficult it has to be to fight your way to a healthy place but keep fighting. Proud of you!
This is your journey and you owe us no explanation. I will pray for family unity, however, I will also pray for your strength and peace as you develop a strong family with your husband and kids. Sometimes putting the toxic person in a "circle" is your only form of protection and growth for yourself. Love your mother and allow yourself to keep her in the emotional circle she has created. You continue to move forward and love her where she is and in the manner you can. If it's thru prayer only then that's what it is. Love to you, your sisters, and your other family members! All things work for the good...
Vaughn, you've been through so much this past decade. So many highs and lows. As a viewer this is one of the first times I've seen the weight of life lifted off of you. You truly seem to be in a better place and that makes me so happy for you. Keep putting yourself first. You're worth it.
Congrats to Anne! You all looked adorable in your white outfits.
Vaughn, please don't be so hard on yourself! You are a wonderful parent and always go above and beyond for your family! That's why God chose you. Don't ever doubt your parenting decisions you go hard every time! Kudos mama🥰 As far as the locs are concerned, you use very good products that are residue free and you have a great wash schedule/routine. Keep up the good work!
When the Anneburglur cut the light off, I thought my phone died 😂
😂😂😂
😅😅😅😅
I loved that! We were confused, but she was clear. 😂
"thats enough telling my business" i died 🤣
I was like what is this technical difficulties? 😂
It’s been 2 years since I had to cut my Mother out of my life. I couldn’t take the toxicity anymore I chose me. I don’t miss the drama, I’m so at peace. My energy is for my Husband & Children.
I love the patio it’s giving resort vibe
💯 🙌🏾🫶🏾 loving the peace & blessings
Thank you so much ❤️
I done it 15 years ago. Best thing I have ever done for me and my mental and well-being. 🙏
5 months for me🎉
Matthew 12 : 46 to 50. Blessings
I could not grab my phone fast enough to COMMEMD your bravery and courage!!!
I do NOT know your specific situation and totally applaud your wisdom in NOT sharing.
I agree 1000% with EVERYTHING u stated about how we perceive mothers.
THANK YOU Vaughn. I have shared your sentiments for YEARS and have NEVER heard anyone who literally has seen the horrors that mothers inflict on their children.
Children can be the victims of abuse from their mothers too! I believe you Vaughn and I pray u continue to do what’s necessary for your continued healing, recovery and emotional safety.
❤
Anne and her Dad have a sweet, sweet relationship! Anne knows that Daddy is her best friend!!
Anne flipping off the light was hilarious 😂
I can relate to your mother issue and others' response to it. Someone very close to me sent me the book, "Mother Hunger", and it was a good step in allowing me to understand how the trauma affected me and how I can move forward. I'd also recommend this book for those who can't fully understand the deep wounds of an abusive mother/ daughter relationship! Sending peace your way! ✌🏾💚✨
agree...Mother Hunger is great!
This is so great. Thank you.
@@MsVaughnTVYou're welcome! 💗
Matthew 12 : 46 to 50. Blessings
The way i burst out laughing at Anne turning off that light! Chile, she said "...and, end scene" 🤣 😂
Ms Vaughn, I can't say that I had the same experience with my mom, but i truly understand. Just because someone shares the same blood or has birthed you does not mean you have to take any type of mistreatment. I understand how society puts mothers on a pedestal but all mothers aren't created equal. Love her from a distance.
This!!!
So my daughter (12) asked me how you were doing. She said it like she was asking about a family member. I just realized she has grown up watching me watch you. It was so sweet.
Very well said Mrs.Vaughn I’m a long time subscriber and I have never commented but, I too am a Chicagoan raised in the projects in the 70’s. But I agree, I experienced my trauma at the age of 10 years old and I know you can imagine what it is at that young age. And now I’m 59 years old going to therapy while the abuser goes on with their life as normal. and situation as such people tend to just look over or think it’s not a problem. This is the reason why we continue to carry generational trauma. Sorry for the long conversation, but I love your Vlogs and I had to speak on this sensitive topic. ❤
Vaughn, the way you nurture your kids and treat other people says a lot about who you are. You exude patience and pure kindness, so just know that if you choose you to be happy, do not apologize for it. I know it’s hard because that is your mother, but remember just because you have chosen not to deal with her on a day to day basis does not mean that she is still not a apart of your heart. So the way you have decided to handle the situation is for your peace and a sound mind….so have no worries. May the love of the LORD JESUS CHRIST rest bountifully on your soul. Love you ❤ much!
First of all, CONGRATULATIONS, Anne!!
As I sit here listening to you talk about your experiences with your mom, I am actually tearful. When I say no one believes me in regards to the things I've experienced with my mom in my 43 years. Whew. So I say kudos to you for doing what you needed to do for you. You are so right. There is a zero tolerance attitude when it comes to abuse, with the exception of when it comes from mothers. I think this is because the brain has a very hard time processing that type of experience and also because the abusive mothers tend to be creative in their execution. Keep on growing, living, and enjoying your best life!
I second that 51 years 🫶🏾🙌🏾
@simoneandrews215 I wish you peace and healing. I also wish you the ability to see yourself and love yourself the way that those who DESERVE you do.
I appreciate everything you said in reference to your relationship with your mom. I have experienced the same with mine, I had to distance myself from her as well. Physical, verbal and emotional abuse was all I got from her. At 18 and pregnant she put me out and told me to never ask her for anything. I had only been living with her from the age of 14 when she first beat me with an extension cord. I am now 61 and she is 75 dealing with health issues and the rest of the family feels that I should be taking care of her, ABSOLUTELY NOT! To be subjected to more abuse after finally finding my peace, I will not. So I appreciate you! Thank you for standing your ground!🎉❤
1. Anne makes my day every time
2. I can totally relate to what you are experiencing with your mother. So much so that sometimes I envy those who have close mother daughter relationships because I’ve never had it.
3. Youth to the people..Moisturizer Yes!!
Hi Vaughn. I am one of those long term subscribers that have been watching from before you were married. Ive never commented but felt an urge to do so after watching this video. You absolutely have the right to only show us what you want us to see. But there are many of us that have experience with toxic/narcissistic people in our lives, including mothers. You are not alone and we would absolutely believe you. Wishing you all the best.
I recently went no contact with my own mother and listening to you definitely resonated with me. I agree with all that you said. I feel understood and heard listening to you. Thank you so much for that. Not everyone understands what it’s like deciding to cut contact with a family member. ❤ Sending you positive energy and hugs. 🥰
Congratulations Anne!! 🎉 What a big achievement 🌟
💯 🙌🏾🫶🏾
I just love Anne’s personality. She be low key shady 😂. Hearing you express your truth regarding family relationships and invalidation, made me feel like my husband and I were seen. We’ve gone through it and people just can’t fathom the enforced boundaries. It’s truly taxing.
Girl you ain’t gotta explain. I’ve never experienced your situation, but I’ve worked with kids who have toxic mom /daughter relationships. I’m happy you have a good support system.
Congratulations Anne! She is proof that y’all are wonderful parents!
I’m so glad you have your dad to take up the slack of parenthood. Your dad is awesome. Out of all the times I’ve seen him on your channel. So thank God for him.
As I get older Ive realized people have a hard time taking accountability for there actions. Everyone likes to play the blame game instead of owning up to there wrong doing. So many relationships could be repaired just from taking accountability and actually taking steps to change moving forward.
Congrats to Ann and your family, I enjoy seeing her growth.
Congratulations to Annie boo on her graduation 🎉
As for the dynamic with your mom. There’s some people that will believe it for sure. Because believe it or not some have gone through similar unspoken things. So without knowing and needing to know the way that you expressed yourself I believe whatever the issue is that you’re saying without knowing. It’s like the pain, tone, and look in your eyes says a lot without saying it. I feel you deeply. I too have had that same expression before. ♥️
In society especially the black community we’re taught to honor our mother and our father and our days on earth will be longer. But today and moving forward so many of us is braking the mix up people have used with that statement. We are regaining our right, our peace, our life. Remember there will be folks that won’t understand and that’s on them but you’re not alone. I don’t believe most scenarios that exist in life only happens to one person so know some of us feel you without you having to say a word.
Do what’s best for you and yours. I’m happy therapy is helpful and continue to break generational curses.
My hat goes off to you Vaughn. You are such a great mom to Anne. Your love and patience is apparent in all your videos but especially this one. When days get tough. You ALWAYS remember your story is helping many others including me.🙌🏽😊
Allow yourself some grace. Also, give us some grace. Speaking for me, I only follow/subscribe influencers that I admire or relate to. I don't have kids, but I can relate to so many other things you post. WE will believe you! But you do not have to share. I respect your privacy and as someone said earlier, this is your journey ❤. We are here for you! I have a twin sister that has absolutely drained the effing life out of me. At 50 years old (51 now) I decided to end my relationship with her. So I 100% understand
I am going to continue to pray for you and your family. I’m kinda going through a situation with my daughter. She is 25 & we have ALWAYS been EXTREMELY close. But in the past 2 years she’s been in situation with a male friend that his completely changed her. It has made our relationship significantly deteriorate. I love her and I know she loves me but we just have to go through this tough season and I know things will eventually mend. She has been one of my best-friends & it’s been tough not being as close but I will continue to pray that the lord brings us out of this storm.
Anne is such a pretty little girl. And she has perfected the art of stalling getting that hair washed. But being the amazing mother that you are, you patiently waited her out and got it done.😊 Her hair is really growing, and you're doing a great job with it. And by the way, I completely believe you. When you know, you know.❤
With my mom, I had to cut ties with her as well. My mom was an alcoholic and it was also the cause of her death. She would say and do things that were unacceptable. I had to put me and my mental health first. It's crazy toward the end, she had to move in with my grandma and I. We didn't know she was dying. Yes, we still butted heads....lol We had a whole yr of every last everything.
You have to do what is right for you and your family. Many blessings...❤ 🙏🏽
Vaughn…girl, I just love your realness. First let me congratulate Anne! I know the other internet aunties can agree that we are so proud of her. It’s truly such a beautiful blessing to see her progress. Thank you for continuing to share and teach us. I must admit, I was cracking up at her sitting in that chair with the robe and hat on eating snacks trying her best to literally be unbothered. 😂 She looked like such a big kid in her splash outfit and her sunnies. 🥹 Lastly, I COMPLETELY empathize on the family situation. I hate that people won’t drop it because honestly it’s none of our business. I appreciate you sharing simply because I believe it does help people gain other perspectives for similar situations but at the end of the day, even if we’ve watched every vlog, we DON’T actually know you or your family and what you’ve gone through.
Your relationship with your Mom is nobody’s business. I pray for healing for you and your family. You are not required to deal with someone’s toxicity simply because they’re family and you have the right to have boundaries.
Everything you said regarding your Mom sound so similiar to my relationship with mine. She have everyone fooled thinking she's a sweet church lady but in reality she's toxic asf and not a good person. I'm still unpacking so much trauma from my childhood and beyond. Folks like to say "you only get 1 Mother" but she only get 1 me too. I'm just as important and deserving of love. Protect your peace. These folks that cannot relate to having to cut their Mom off need to read the room and stfu. The onus shouldnt always be on the wronged to fix a relationship.
Thank you Vaughn. I had an abusive relationship with my mom and I have told my truth and folks thought I am lying still. My mother died and all I felt was relief. I have A LOT of therapy to do. I also live in the house where all the years of abuse occurred but it’s process. I don’t need to know the details. I BELIEVE YOU and support the decisions that you make to preserve YOU 💛💛
Congratulations on the graduation ❤ 🎓 👏
Forget these people who don’t get it!! You’re telling the truth for a lot of people.
Did Anne turn the light off?? 😂😂😂😂 I love that kid!!!
You are so on point when talking about moms being able to do what they want. People have got to stop that narrative that if you don’t have a good relationship with your mom it’s something that you have done. Just because you have a great relationship with your mom doesn’t mean we are wrong or hateful because we don’t. We have the right to say we don’t want to mistreated! Period! If you get it you get it, if you don’t keep it on mute. Respectfully
You do not owe anyone an explanation for anything. It's your channel, and you have invited us into your home and you have the right to share or not. Who are these people? God bless you beautiful family and please don't let the negative comments get to you. Stay healthy and whole both physically, mentally and spiritually.
Thank you so much, Vauhn, for confirming that I am not crazy. I no longer discuss issues regarding my mom with family or friends because they don't understand or think I'm exaggerating the situation. Blessing to you and your beautiful family❤
I love what you said about how folks feel like death is the reason you should make up with someone! My father has MS and I don’t have a huge relationship with him because of how he acts, and I’ve always heard “you’ll be sorry about this when he dies” and I could never understand why that was the end all, be all. Thank you for sharing, seriously.
I totally agree...everybody experience in relationships are not the same. My peace is very important to me. It's no one job except my own💞
As someone who has a very difficult relationship with my mother, (and had to distance myself for my and my family’s health), I want to send your speech to everyone on my mother’s side of the family😂 When I say it’s difficult enough processing my own feelings on the situation without everyone constantly telling ME, the child, to mend the relationship. It’s so unfair. Being a parent has only made it more clear that I would never do some of the things she’s done. And I do the work to ensure I don’t fall into her habits. Thank you for sharing what you were comfortable sharing. It helps to hear from someone who understands ❤
Girl your mom is my mom. I been there. I even moved across the country because of the mother/daughter relationship. It’s unfortunate but we have to do what needs to be done to keep our peace.
Honoring your mother can definitely be done from afar! Realizing when to remove yourself from an abusive or toxic person is so important to sustain emotional well being! Thanks for sharing Vaughn💛.
I’ve always admired the way you articulate your feelings and your ability to offer another perspective on different topics. Your take on mothers and how they’re often impervious to accountability was spot on. Real food for thought.
I really hope through prayer and therapy that you all could come to some middle ground she might not be the mother you needed but she might be the grandmother Anne and Ava would love ❤️
Hi! What you stated about death was spot on. I have felt the same way about this issue for years. When I cut off some of my family members, and some in-laws too, I ignored everyone who tried to press/guilt me into restarting those relationships. I didn’t look back. I felt no guilt. And my life was greatly improved - especially my sanity. Btw, both my mother and mother-in-law (who never met each other) have since died. At some point, you just gotta quit. I have no regrets.
Hey Vaughn, I do understand what you are dealing with. I will continue to pray for you and your mom. Stay encouraged 🌹
PS: Congratulations to Anne on graduating to 1st grade. She is making so much progress. You have the patience of Job. Don’t ever sell yourself short…you are a phenomenal mom❤️
Liissttteennn… I don’t know and don’t NEED to know the details… BUT… if you ever start a support group for daughters with “unhealthy” / toxic relationships with their mothers… I would attend. I wish you the best ! Thanks for always giving us such great content!
Vaughn thx for your transparency and I 1000% agree with you. Unless someone experiences estrangement from a mother due to abuse it can be difficult to understand. My mom and I are 9 yrs estranged and even when I talk to my husband of 17 yrs about the things I went through and even things he’s witnessed he’s still in disbelief. And for me personally as a 40 yr old mom of 4 of whom 2 are girls, the part no one ever thinks about is how it affects you when you’re a grown woman with kids doing therapy to heal from both childhood and adulthood trauma from your mother while also trying to create a emotionally safe relationship with your own daughters.
Hello Vaughn, I hear you on motherhood (or any relationship). If you think about it -- whether it is domestic violence or sexual abuse or emotional abuse/estrangement -- the rule is that the victim must forgive or tolerate that kind of toxicity. The answer to that is NO. There comes a point when you have to value yourself more. Know that you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. Of course, I don't know the details of your situation (rightfully so), I support your right to heal and remove yourself from it.
I have had similar experiences. I recognized some behaviors in your vids in real time. I pray that you receive the healing you deserve. You and your sisters have turned out to be phenomenal women!
First, Congratulations Anne!! And Congratulations to you and Anthony as well!! ❤❤❤
Thank you for embracing all of yourself, your journey as a mother, daughter, sister, wife and sharing with us in such an open, honest and caring way. May God’s blessings of peace, healing, wisdom, love, forgiveness and grace cover you and your family!! It takes courage and strength to recognize the need for and to prioritize your own emotional health and wellbeing and also to set boundaries and or remove toxic relationships from your life. It is very difficult but oftentimes very necessary. Grace and peace to you Vaughn!! ❤️🙏🏽
Thank you for sharing your struggle. At times I feel alone with the pain and toxic relationship I have with my mother… I feel like we need a support group “ surviving a toxic mother” as a social worker , over the years I’ve tried to have empathy for her knowing … she also was someone daughter and experienced the same… but it’s hard because if you know better you do better.. and she hasn’t .. at this point… I’m praying for all daughters that are healing from this trauma ❤
Stay strong in your journey. I’ve gone no contact with my mother’s sister and I’ve had to constantly literally go off on my mama and her siblings about it.
Thank you so much for sharing your journey. There are so many of us out here that are navigating difficult mother daughter bonds and it is not easy to share or even be acknowledged. But you are seen and I hope you know your words are helping others feel seen as well. I wish you and your family so much peace and happiness ❤.
Sad about the mom situation, I remembered one of the past vlogs with her, and I thought she might have some anxiety issues with bipolar disorder. If that is the sit,hopefully she gets help.❤
Vaughn, one of the reasons why I’ve been supporting your content for so long is because of your realness and authenticity. You sharing your reasons on why you’re not sharing the details on the fall out with your mother was so real. I am one who pondered what could have happened between yall but I acknowledged to myself that it’s really none of my business. What you said brought me back to my thoughts on a friend of mine and her relationship with her mother. When she explained to me how she felt I couldn’t comprehend it because I lost my mother at a young age and I thought to myself like how could you! I later told her my thoughts and apologized to her. I understand how easy it is to project our thoughts and feelings on someone else’s life or relationships and that is not good. Thank you for that reality check again and I’m sending you my love 🫶🏾
Girl. The way you spoke directly to me in this segment. A Word. A Mfn Word. From the special needs baby to the mom experience. Wheeeew! This.
Ann is getting so big! When I 1st started watching you, I think Ann was 3 going on 4. She has come such a very long way; I believe with all my heart Ann is going to talk in full sentences as she gets older. Vaughn, you & Anthony are such great parents to both of your children. And Sansa too! In your last Vlog I didn't mention anything about your mom. Because I have been where you are at, & it's none of my business. My mom has gone on to her glory now, & I believe wholeheartedly that the Lord has told her the errors of her ways. I feel that in my heart, & I'm at peace with the situation. Love you Vaughn & your family!
I know one thing... the Anneburger is a whole vibe... she's cool people. Sitting there with the hat on cracked me up! Remember that time she said... are you done with my hair?!! 😱 You had gotten on her laaast nerve!! 😂 This time she was like... lights out ma'am, we're DONE here! 😅
She is a vibe!
You would be surprise that what you are going through with your mother is not surprising, you can only make yourself happy and the only way is to be true to yourself, if your not happy and healthy than your no good to your daughters, happy for Ms Ann graduating what a big girl she is and so is the baby what a sweety, lol.
Listen your experience is real and none of us can and or should judge or insert our opinions on YOUR experience. Thank you for even sharing this because you didn’t have to. 💛💙
"You are not going to believe me." You better say that. People do not understand, empathize, etc. It's not even worth discussing details with people who haven't lived it. You said it perfectly. I have the same perspective with my mother. I respect her, and that respect can coexist with my need to protect and guard my self-worth and peace.
💯 on the ability to cut off moms. That hit me to my core. Thanks for saying it out loud. ❤
Hey Vaughn, Have you tried turning wash day into an experience for her? Maybe a small projector in bathroom and a lot of water toys , water colors or something? Idk just thinking. ❤
Anne boo is living her best life…thanks to her amazing mommy!! Have a great weekend Vaughn 💕
Boy boy boy boy boy!! You’ve articulated the “toxic mother” segment so very well!! Like took all my thoughts and verbalized them so perfectly. Like I’m almost in tears because this is exactly it!!!! I could go on and on, but you said it ma’am!
😢
A lot of women can relate to you more than you know, Vaughn, when it comes to the mother daughter dynamic. In the Black community, we were conditioned to keep things private, accept any kind of treatment from family including parents. Even as adults, the crossing of boundaries, not being respected as a grown woman, not considering your feelings and so forth. We understand and this internet is forever so share as little as you want to share.
If anything, the tidbit of information you shared has helped a lot of women to not feel alone.
Just that tidbit of information was enough.
You have two daughters and they will be better women because you chose to do things differently for yourself and them. ❤
The one thing I love about you is when you share your feelings and walk away. I cannot imagine and I can’t even try to imagine but I understand. Thanks for your transparency ❤
I appreciate everything you've said around your relationships your mother and everything you haven't said. I can understand. In our community, a lot of us cant fathom cutting parents, in particular mothers, off because of unhealthy behaviors and boundary crossing.
However, I notice more and more mental health professionals publicly supporting these discussions around this scenario and providing insight on how to handle it for ones own self-preservation and care.
Also like to add that was a good point you made about the possibility of death occurring a person should still endure the abuse albeit physical, emotional, verbal, etc. Death is gonna occur anyway and no one should have to endure any type of abuse from an abuser...going thru the same with my granddad. .had to cut him off after so many years. .it's sad
Congratulations Anne!!!! You are the best!
Vaughn, thank you for sharing! I am so with you! What I don’t know I don’t comment on but goodness, the way you spoke on that was classy and honestly words I’ve said forever! Relationships are so complicated and we need to stop pushing people to endure what we don’t know first hand!
The babies are beautiful, you’re beautiful and doing a good job mama and we are here for it! Blessings to you!
I’ve been following you for a minute, we all have our challenges. You’re taken them as they come, like us all and doing it with Grace. Good job Vaughn
I completely understand the disconnect between mother and daughter.. I experienced it for many years. Now that I have removed myself from the toxicity, I feel relief, but there are days that I feel pain, because I never received the closure/ truth that I once longed for.
I appreciate your channel because I'm a god-mother to a sweet baby girl with special needs. I learn so much from you and I'm constantly sharing with the child's mother. I want to learn as much as I can and it's good to learn from all facets. You're doing an amazing job, keep up the great work.
You preached a sermon on how our community views relationships with mothers. We have to do better. Wishing you endless peace regarding this subject.
Vaughn I’m truly sorry you have to go through this with your mom. I’m also happy you sought help. I’ve been dealing with horrible relationship w/ my mother ever since I was a child. I thank my grandparents for coming to my aid and taking me away from the toxic environment. At 56, I am absolutely at peace with my limited relationship I have w/ my mother. You’re definitely right about the double standards of moms getting away with abusive behavior toward their children. Keeping you in my prayers.
Love your vlogs and 🥳 🎉congratulations to Anne.
I got the ‘do not ask me for anything ever’ from my father towards me and my child. He was close with the other kids but for some reason not me. Everything I did was ridiculed. And when he died I felt no different. No grief. I just say bye and left it. I have a relationship with my mother and am grateful but I guess not as close as I could be. I feel she has her favorites. So I leave it where it is and respect what I get.
I’ve seen relationships not so great with friends and their mothers so I understand and I commend you. Do what you have to. ❤
Vaughn!! Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and memorable time in your family’s life. I’m so happy and proud of your (our! lol) sweet Anne..she’s like my internet niece. I’ve been a subscriber since 2012, when I was finally done chopping /transitioning my crown. You and Meechy were my GURUS, PERIOD! I am so happy that you unapologetically chose to prioritize your mental and emotional well-being, even though I am sure it was gut-wrenching decision to make. I pray that you are moving toward absolute peace and healing. I also pray that your mom is working on her own mental and emotional health, with accountability as the driving force for her healing. Sometimes loving someone means deciding to no longer trauma bond with them. Familiarity and “routine” can mask itself as “normal”. It is not….❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
With Ann’s loc to avoid the clips if she doesn’t like them try to two strand twist them and put rubber bands and the ends.
I applaud you for having the strength and courage to stand up for yourself? You have to continue to choose peace of mind, as you are a mother, wife, and daughter.... your dad loves you and your sisters.
Oh Vaughn, I love your channel and rarely comment , but I had to-- on how Anne came to soothe you at 30:09 . Just so precious. My son does this to me too, and its always so subtle and quick like Anne did. A reminder of how smart and in tune to their mamas they are. But its always a quick lil gesture and back to their business they go haha
FYI I am binge watching your channels to help pull me out of a deep funk . I love it here lol
So proud of your courage and you also talking to us about your situation with your mom a lot of us didn’t feel that we had anyone to tell or felt like we were going through this alone. I’m so happy that I’m on your page and you encourage other women to find peace when not having a relationship with anyone that’s toxic
Hey Vaughn, I just want to be supportive of whatever you have endured as far as family matters. I'm proud of you for taking care of yourself and getting the help that you need. Everything that happens in your life doesn't have to be exposed and you are very brave just to share what you shared. Keep striving to be the best that you can be and going over and beyond for your husband and children!
Honestly in my opinion it's no one's business as to what happened between you and your mom...I understand people asking the question because she used to be in your blogs and now she isn't but sharing details is no ones business and I can't fathom why a person would think you would share details. I wish you and your family the best! Also, Anne's hair has really grown and congratulations on her graduating I know u all are proud 🎉❤
I have a really good relationship with my Mom, BUT I fully understand that family can be toxic and their lives can impact you in very real ways. I applaud you and your ability to do what is best for you and your best mental health. I appreciate you sharing and I'm happy that you have therapy to process al the things. I love that you and your sisters have each other and your Dad is the GOAT!! Love your family and your blogs!
I am so proud of you. You are correct on not sharing all of your business. Care for her and know your boundaries to protect your immediate family. Proud of you being able to speak your truth.
Maybe try a kids salon. Some places have trained staff who understand sensory issues.
Vaughn, I encourage whatever decision you’ve made for self preservation within your family. No questions asked. Congrats to Miss Annie on her graduation! I felt like a proud Auntie watching the reels.😍
I appreciate your boundaries and sharing what you feel comfortable to share. I would hate to live thru a tough situation and have others who know nothing about you to give unwanted opinions and pass judgment. I'm happy to go along with the ride. 🙏🏽
I think I understand the situation with your mother, simply because I no longer go into explaining my own mother as the perceptions of others can feel so invalidating. I've had to go no contact with my mom after trying to reconcile but that reconnection was heavy effort on my part and I ended up in a worse state so decided to go no contact again. Your talk about the onus being on us daughters as accepting abuse is something I still encounter from others but they don't know what I've been through. It's no easy feat cutting off your mother amd we don't do it for flimsy reasons that can be easily reconciled. I love and enjoy your vlogs especially as I'm estranged from my own family, it's nice to see and watch your family dynamics especially when you all get together. Well done Anne, congratulations for graduating!!
For the first time in a long time I felt the need to respond. And although I know you believe that your relationship with your mom is unique and no one could relate; I honestly believe that there are many more black women out here that can both relate and raise their hands and say "we are or have had to go through this also." I still am proud of you for taking the steps to make sure that you break the cycle of abuse (which sometimes is extremely hard), and not allowing yourself to get abused as an adult. And it hurts so bad to have to cut off a parent but it hits different during certain holidays especially Mothers Day.
Hey Vaughn. Your patio turned out beautiful. The pieces from Wayfair are such a vibe. The love you put into your home inside and out for your family is heartfelt 🤎🏡
Congrats to Anne! 👌🏽🙌🏽👏🏽 So happy for all of Anne's accomplishments big, small and all things in between! 🩷🤎
Ava, so precious and sweet. Too cute for words 🎀🩰🩷🤎
Vaughn, I hear you and respect you. As a long time subscriber, I am here to support you and thank you for sharing. I DO understand you personally as I had to remove my father from my life going on 24 years this year. It has been for the better for me. You need not feel compelled to explain to anyone. All family situations are different and we live our truth protecting ourselves from toxicity whether it be a parent, a sibling, anyone. I sure do appreciate the sit down and putting into your own words what I can honestly relate to. All that said, I wish you continued love and blessings for you and your family. Hugs from NY 🤗
I can relate to your experience with your mom. I have watched you for years. You are a phenomenal woman and mother. Trust me I know what you mean with your mother. I went through hell with mine and never shared it with most people. I just relocated in 2006 and barely speak to her. I definitely dealt with people saying you only have one mom, etc. After much therapy I learned that my decision to release that expectation of a better relationship, support or a true mother/daughter relationship was the healthiest choice. I promise you I understand. Please know that you are not alone. Love your Channel 💕
Dealing with a fractured relationship with a family member is tough especially when it’s someone from what I call the “core unit”. My mother was sick unable to speak from my birth until she died. For that reason even though not her fault I had abandonment issues which I am now dealing with in therapy. Through going therapy I have realized I was holding on to toxic people because they were apart of my “core”. It’s hard enough making the step to cut them off for your mental health and then have to hear family members opinions on it. I am sending you nothing about positive energy, you are doing what’s right for you and ultimately your family. Thank you for sharing with us.