Valyrian failed because its two lead actors had as much chemistry together as a block of wood. I have never, ever seen two actors- at least one of whom had a pretty good track record- do so badly in each others' presence. I could easily have believed that they actively hated each other on the set.
I totally agree with this statement. Watching it and the amount of time these two lead actors try to make things work... is just... pain. I also didn't find anything worth investing on the plot-point until act 3. By then, it's too late.
..which seems in part due to absolutely _terrible_ dialogue thoughout. If you're gonna compare Guardians of the Galaxy (1) to it, the vast difference in the quality of the dialogue has to be the first thing mentioned. Valerian sounded like it was dubbed by bored actors reading poor translations.
@ Let's not mince words, here. It was French. That was the culprit. It was French, and it kept its essential Frenchness throughout. 'Twas the froggies wot done it!
@@benb3928 Yes, i watched it both in english and german, the german translation is far less boring and lifts the movie up a bit, probably the reason this movie is more liked here, as far as i am concerned at least!
Me and my brother still have our tickets from seeing it in theaters. It's a precious memory of being the only two other people in an empty theater and just laughing at how bad it was. It did get us to read the original comics at least.
The reason why VALERIAN feels like three different movies is because the director Luc Besson took sequences from different Valerian and Laureline storylines mainly because the more iconic moments of the comic series were from those stories. This would be like someone making a Batman movie with plot elements from BATMAN YEAR ONE, THE KILLING JOKE, DEATH IN THE FAMILY, THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS and KNIGHTFALL and expect it to make sense. The movie would have been best served sticking to one story. By the way the character of Valerian in the comic book never had an origin story perse, he's already established as an intergalactic dashing hero, however Laureline is the one who does get an origin as she is from medieval times who Valerian encounters while on a time travelling mission. Although Valerian is supposed to maintain a cover so as not to alter the timeline ( ala Star Trek and the Prime Directive) Laureline discovers the truth about him, aides him on his mission and to preserve the timeline Valerian whisks her back to the future with him. Many storylines focused on Laureline and her fish out of water reactions to the world of Valerian and would soon develop into a storyline of Laureline exposing the political corruption surrounding Galaxity.
@@zeronightex It was a very weird choice by Snyder. The movie felt like it was trying to build up a rivalry between Batman and Superman, while also at the same time having to introduce the entire DCU. Should've picked a lane and stuck to it.
@@jguifarro2826I don’t understand women. That Timothy Chaerlamange kid looks like a bi-sexual crack baby, but I’m told some girls find him attractive. 🤷♂️
Having the original author smack talk Fifth Element only for his own story's adaptation to get savaged is kind of cathartic to be honest. Fifth Element is amazing, screw that guy.
Valerian: *Proposes to his gf. Okay I don’t know these characters. Tell me why I should care. Valerian: *Has a saved record of all the girls he’s been with No, I said why I SHOULD care! May be the fastest a movie has destroyed my investment in a title character.
As someone who read the comics i can tell you that Valerian is a lovable jerk, sometimes a bit dumb and all the hard work ends up in the hands of Laureline who is always pretty bad ass. At least that's the dynamic of the duo in the first adventures, Pierre Christin eventually made Valerian a bit less dumb and more heroic. Sometimes it's a bit like in the Get Smart TV series, where Maxwell Smart is a dumb and the agent 99 does all the job. The Valerian comics are famous for being material of inspiration for Star Wars and there are panels from "The empire of a thousand planets" that were practically stolen by Star Wars and the sequels. This movie it's a big meh, I watched on a big screen but it was a bit boring to my taste. The initial sequence it's astonishing and the little bit where they stole something on that weird dimension at the beginning it's really amazing and visually original. After that the movie drags a lot and I think that the casting was really bad, no one fit really well. Maybe Cara Delevingne looks a bit like Laureline, but just the looks. The reason you found the plot so convoluted and episodic it's because it's a mishmash of different stories or sequences/ideas from the comics. Like a greatest hits. It's sad because Valerian and Laureline are some of the best science fiction comics ever made and this movie does little justice to the original material.
Not to mention, the leads were complete charisma black holes. Maybe he was going for making them unflappable professionals who've seen it all, but it just made them boring and not half as interesting as the world around them.
I really appreciate your honesty with not knowing the source material enough to make a full judgement, but you did a fantastic job! I do recall reading an article ages ago saying that several plots from the original comics were jammed together to make this film, which explains the odd side quests arranged into the plot's overall narrative.
Using that Beatles song in the trailer was a stroke of genius. As someone who'd never heard it before, experience that paired with the visuals absolutely blew my mind and I knew I had to see it in theaters.
Dane DeHaan is not a leading man - he's a perfect tortured weirdo. Also Laureline is supposed to be a medieval French girl; it should have been played by Isabella Adjani when she was 20.
They look weirdly related like siblings and they act so unlikable and disinterested. It's such a shame considering how beautiful the special effects and worlding building was
The leads have what I would call anti-chemistry; a reaction that causes nausea. The movie tells you they are close but when together, they feel like they just met 10 minutes before the first scene started and they actively hate each other. I've never seen anything like it before, it is on the level of The Room.
Could have been bad directing. They were constantly serious. Shooting a rat they had the same look as if they were longing for a kiss. What actor could be that untrained? Director.
Ok, I have so much to say. As a person that GREW UP on Valerian&Laureline (as did most of northern Europe), this movie makes me scream for oh-so-many reasons. One point you do touch upon that - exactly as for John Carter - people go "Oh they ripped off Star Wars" when it's completely the opposite. Laureline wore the metal bikini in 1973, way before Leia. If you KNOW Valerian&Laureline, you can see it so deeply in Star Wars. Second problem is, Besson had "Kinda" already done Valerian&Laureline, except he CALLED IT "fifth element". In this movie, the dynamics is correct, the designs of stuff is correct, and so on. 5:th element has the LOOK of V&L, heck, the space-taxi? Straight from a V&L comic, like, exactly like it. This forced him to change so many of the designs, because if he used the proper designs people would have said "this looks just like 5:th element", and people would have scoffed. For that reason I cringe at all the changes and designs. Thirdly, for someone seemingly "growing up w. the source material", Besson does V&L a giant disservice. The story steals a TON of the plot from the V&L album "Ambassador of the Shadows" but takes it's title from a totally different unrelated V&L comic (strange). But while the story is near identical in places, he shuffles the action of alien species around for literally NO REASON. Fourthly, as you correcly surmise, the leads are ATROCIOUS. Valerion is heart-of-gold hero guy, but he is kinda stupid, and he kinda actually sucks, and is kinda clumsy. He THINKS he is saving the world, when in reality Laureline is doing ALL OF IT in the background. The entirety of the comic of Ambassador of the Shadows, Valerian is unconcious, and Laureline does literally EVERYTHING. Many beats in the movie are identical to the comic, except SHE is doing al lof them. (Some of the things you dismissed as "side plots" are actually the parts that are key to the plot of the comic, but they are key beacuse they are about HER trying to find HIM, and it's the MAIN plot, not the "side quest"). I do admit it's fun to see some of the almost shot-for-shot remakes in this sequence, to be honest. Except of course, it's HER that uses a shape shifting alien in a space brothel to get some more info, NOT HIM. Finally, the casting. The perfect Valerion would be a young Bruce Cambell. Chisel jawed, "hero" looking, but kinda dumb. A perfect Laureline... I dunno.... realize that in the comics, time travel is a huge part, and she's actually from 12:century French countryside, but was so badass she became a spatio-temporal agent.... anyway... I can't think of a modern actress... maybe a maturer version of Jessica Alba? Scarlett Johanseen? No, needs more gravitas and spunk.... The behavior between the characters should be almost exactly like in 5:th element. Like that scene when Leeloo says "Me, supreme being. ME protect YOU". That's Laureline, exceept, she's not a supreme being, she just kicks THAT MUCH BUTT!! Heck, a huge chunk of the story in the original comic is that V is doing it "by the book", and hence gets caught, knocked out and becomes something she needs to hunt down, and L doesn't give a crap about rules, regulations, and anything, and she just cleverly hunts him down, through a space station built by a million different races (hence all the different "worlds" they pass through - which is also straight from the comic, btw). I *implore* you to read their comics. I literally grew up on them. You can find the online. They are great.
It always hurts when I see a bad movie that doesn’t flop due to obnoxious studios. Making a movie is hard! I’m glad it has some fans and most people acknowledge how cool the world/effects are. Shame it has a bad/cringy script.
I'm from Mexico and yet Valerian and Laureline were my childhood heroes alongside with Asterix & Obelix and Iznogud, those were comics my father bought at bookstores that came from the Spanish editions. They were amazing! The plot from the move is a lose adaptation of the book "The Ambassador of the Shadows", but also takes elements from "The City of a Thousand Planets". "The Empire of a Thousand Planets" and "Welcome to Traumstadt" to a lesser extent. It's obviously a mishmash of concepts and ideas, that aligns perfectly with your impression that Luc just wanted to showcase as much as possible of what he liked, and just like a glutton kid in a candy shop, it's just a disaster. Plus the cast is a total miss, neither Valerian nor Laureline are remotely as pictured. For me a better way to introduce them would have been a montage of how they met, the aventures they had together (with visuals from the books as trivia for those who know) while Valerian and Laureline narrate in a playful manner, ie: Valerian: and so I saved the day! Laureline: Yeah, right, if had not done this, you would still be stuck in that planet! Valerian: Ok, I'll admit you helped a little... And then you begin the movie with a clear idea what kind of adventurers they are. You can create your own adventure instead, a good movie, that can have some nods to the comics, not trying to remix things and making it so overcomplicated. Also, the Star Wars comparisons are kinda valid, only George Lucas did take some inspiration from V&L, not the other way around, lol.
This film deserved better,the most expensive INDIE film and European film,throughout all its ups and downs it still remains an underappreciated gem.(And in some ways the pinnacle of European filmmaking...)
I hate posting this because I love your work and celebrate the fact that a live human is narrating a youtube anymore, but it's pronounced "sim-IL-arity" not "sim-YOU-larity." (I'm not trying to be a grammar you-know-what, I'm just trying to spare my ears!) Love you and your content.
I love this movie so much! It's so charmingly dorky. Once you learn to shake off the secondhand embarrassment you unavoidably get while watching it, it's very enjoyable. This movie is to me what Sahara is to you. Thanks for covering it! 💜
A critic said Valerian has to be Han Solo but there is already a Han Solo, dunno if Solo was "inspired" by Valerian of just his feeling, we need to see the source material of both movies to know if that was part of the issue.
7:35 you have an inaccuracy. The novel that Disney's 'John Carter' was developed from is not titled "John Carter of Mars". E.R. Burrough's novel was titled "Princess of Mars", John Carter is the protagonist but is in no way titular. Edit: syntax
Right, but his POINT stands. Had they titled it "John Carter OF MARS" maybe SOMEONE would have lifted one finger, realized it's a literally ONE HUNDRED (100!!!!!!) year old story, and not say STUPID CRAP like "this ripped off Star Wars"...
Ive very rarely seen a film where i thought "this 1 scene was more enjoyable than the rest of the film" and the opening of this Film followed by what happens next is a textbook example. Also this film/A Cure for Wellness/and Amazing Spiderman 2 proved 3 strikes for trying to make Dane Dehaan happen when it wasnt gonna happen
@ender7278 I agree. Up legitimately is remembered for that opening sequence but people seem to have trouble remembering how forgettable the rest of the movie is.
Movie with such a great premise. Story that held a ton of potential and was filmed beautifully, tons of effort went into the world building. The script itself and dialogue however, lacked entirely and wasted what could have been great; is a shame.
I think the reason there is no romantic chemistry between the lead actors is because Cara Delvigne is a militant lesbian. They should have cast a straight actress to play a straight character.
You talk a lot about failed franchise starters. Have you thought about doing videos on unexpected successful franchise starters like Pirates of the Caribbean, Iron-Man, or Sonic the Hedgehog?
Very intriguing history of this Luc Besson joint. 🤔 With this having a budget of $180 million, and _Megalopolis_ having a budget of $120 million, why is _Megaolopolis_ still usually described as “the most expensive independent movie”? 😮
@7:40 I have to say, the French original title of the graphic novels is just “Valerian, agent spatio-temporel”. The title comes from the episode “The Empire of a Thousand Planets”.
12:59 imo Cara Delevingne is a good actress with bad luck. She got the female lead role in Paper Towns by auditioning with a scene from the book that's very charged and emotional. Her character just seems happy and distant in the movie ending (which was a reshoot). She even admitted during an interview that she didn't feel enough empathy watching her performance in the final cut. You get glimpses of how good she can be in the moments where she's allowed to be sad, or scared, or excited. At the end when Laureline asks Valerian to follow his heart instead of his orders as a soldier, she takes this pause where you can see how disappointed she is, and scared that she could lose him forever because they fundamentally disagree on the right thing to do. I still remember that scene years later because I thought it was only time I could actually see what Laureline was feeling. The rest of the movie plays like she's suppressing her emotions for the sake of their mission. I was shocked when I read Laureline's backstory after seeing the movie. If the plot had been her going to the future and reacting to everything for the first time then Cara Delevingne could have been a fantastic choice. I don't think it's her fault. I think it's a symptom of this idea that "strong" characters are always stoic and determined and in control of themselves. Admirable? ...Maybe? But it isn't relatable.
This is a french movie with a hollywood budget. And by french I mean the vibe and the sense of humor, and even the casting. Those two are not Hollywood attractive - they are french attractive - (good looking but kinda sickly and ordinary). Even the lack of chemistry and the arrogance are french. I had the feeling I was watching some old french comedy about love and existentialism. And I love those type of movies, but the clash with the Hollywood blockbuster part of it was too strong.
I really wanted this movie to be good. The visuals were absolutely *awesome* …and I completely agree with you about the casting being bad. Dehaan and Delavingne truly looked like siblings so their flirting just felt very Hapsburg-esque in its portrayal which is So. Very. Gross. It’s such a shame. I wanted this movie to succeed too 🥺 it had so much potential.
Although I didn't watch this movie or read the comics, I did watch the cartoon series "Time Jam: Valerian & Laureline" based on those comics when I was younger. According to Wikipedia, this show has a different tone and story from the source material, but I still think it's great. Time Jam has a very interesting plot, Valerian and Laureline have a much better relationship, sometimes the tone of the show gets really dark and what I liked the most about this cartoon is how it cleverly explained various political actions which could happen in real life, so the younger viewers could understand them, which somehow I didn't notice them at first when I was a kid. Apparently, on RUclips there are all episodes available in English dub, but I can't tell if the voice acting is good or if the voices are matched well to the characters because I watched Time Jam in Polish dub. I can recommend this show if anyone is interested, because I think it's worth its time.
A terrible title. A bad trailer. A property nobody knew or wanted to watch. Two lead actors who can't act. Two lead actors with no star power or charisma....
I might not think it's a great movie, but I had fun seeing it in theaters. Particularly the first five minutes felt wonderful. But the issue I had with it is it didn't feel very cohesive, more like it should have been a short series instead of a movie.
Why Tut Failed In 2015 Spike TV Aired The historical Miniseries Tut starring Avan Gogia who you know as Beck from Nickelodeon's Victorious who plays the titular King Tut While the show tries to portray Ancient Egypt Accurately especially the Incest part but comes off more 300 less Ancient Egypt and that's people turned on the show also Gogia acting was MID at best trying to be King Leonidas leaning on the 300 comparisons some more the point Spike TV's heart was In the right place but didn't pay off at the end now It's lost media It could muster the same rating as IZombie, Into The Badlands or Dark Matter
I love this movie! Not because it's necessarily good, it just looks so good! The two things they nailed are the visuals and the lore/world. If someone made another movie set in this universe I'd watch it.
I actually liked Valerian, yeah some characters were a bit cliche, but that is part of the film's soul, so if you and watch it as a Space Opera that is serious, nope, thats not the way to enjoy it. I think it was a fun film, entertaining, and of good quality 👌🏼 Could have been better, but wasn't bad by no means.
The only thing I remember about this film is that Cara spent most of the film half naked and that she has funny eyebrows. And I guess there were aliens or something.
For my part, I think it failed because for all its awesome sci-fi imagery, world-building, action, and some fun characters, the main character was the most unlikable, whiny, useless, annoying, incelly sack of box office poison possibly ever. Had it just been Laureline it might've been a classic to rank alongside The Fifth Element. I look forward to the video!
When I stop to think about it, I can only associate this Cara Delavigne girl with big commercial or critical failures, so why is she even considered an A-list star? 🤔
I still find it amazing that they somehow made a 25 year old Cara Delavingne look 15 in that suit. I enjoyed her and Bear Grylls. She should do more survival shows! I never saw the movie, but it did interest me enough to read a chunk of the source material. I'm not crazy about it but it's enjoyable enough that I can see why kids could really like it
So I read a lot of Valerian in my teenage years and while I didn't read the whole series, but I know enough to be very confused by some of the adaptation choices. Especially with Besson saying quite loudly it was his passion project and it's no like they were movie executives above him to tell him what to do about the source material. A massive omission is that the movie has no mention of time travel and it's incredibly important to the setting. Laureline is literally an 11th-century peasant that now lives in the distant future (Her backstory in the movie as far as I can tell is just that she went to an Ivy League school, which is a lot more boring). The story that is the closest to the movie is the ambassador of Shadow, while it's not the worst choice. There's this issue where it's not. It's at the point that the comic started to move away from more straight forward pulp sci-fi and changes things around, the plot of the original comic is mostly about Laureline saving Valerian after him being in the driver seat after a few adventures. Since it's their first adventure in the movie it has to shift it to them both saving each other because the title character would otherwise have nothing to do. It shifts a few things around (Like in the original, the aliens at the center of the plot created the station instead of humanity, it,s also named Central Point instead of ALpha)
I know this movie's got a ton of flaws but since I'm a sucker for these types of films, of course I enjoyed it! I would've liked it more if it had a better director to be honest
Everyone has bad movies they like, and I admit, this is one of mine. The weakest point for me is DeHaan and Delevigne and the lack of chemistry/tension.
I really liked this movie and the two protagonists a lot. Very different from the kind of heroes we're used to seeing triple A movies. Just a fun adventure all the way. But I remember at the time this movie got hate from the get go. When there's a compaign of thate like this to something, you don't have a chance.
I recall watching this film on its opening weekend after getting a $5 movie ticket coupon from buying The Giver (another bad film, by the way) on DVD. I recall being so bored and almost sleepy while watching it, only being woken up by the explosions.
I genuinely love this movie. It has flaws, no doubt about it, but I always see myself coming back to it more than any other Sci-Fi movie or series. As much as I adore DeHaan, he doesn't work as a heroic lead, however he does fit the profile of the character so it's really. We may be getting a sequel anyways.
Watching this made me realize that in a vacuum a lot of these moments are absolutely stunning I still think the opening 5 minutes of the movie is incredible and if it's just a short film I think It's perfect and then the rest of the movie happens and there's so much that just jumps around with an interesting plot points uninteresting characters with no chemistry. But man just seeing individual clips of stuff it is truly stunning.
When it came out, I felt the reason why the film wasn't going to work was because of a similar reason why John Carter hadn't worked: the fact that there are already so many films inspired by it that doing a direct adaptation of it would make it be redundant as a result. I heard that George Lucas cited Valerian as an influence of Star Wars, like John Carter of Mars had also had it's influence on him. But, I know I was wrong on both assessments, and both films were both enjoyable and entertaining in my opinion. To me, I feel sorry they both failed.
I love the film despite all its failings because even years later in retrospect it doesn't just feel like another generic slop sci-fi film and actually has stuck in my mind as unique even if I cant remember anything about the plot or characters lol
Also the main protagonist has been with all these women, but the actor gives him zero charisma or confidence. I buy Grima Wormtongue getting a harem before Valerian
Nice review. I watched it and I got lost in the middle and was asking myself, what are these guys looking for again? Like you said, it looked like a bunch of smaller stories smashed together like if they had collected a few second highlights of a whole TV series
Writing before watching. For me, the two leads were very bad casting choices. And it's been a while since I watched the film and I don't remember who the antagonist/villan was. Now let's see what you think. Also, thanks for the video.
I generally liked any scene that didn't have both the main characters. As soon as they were together, it was terrible. The best example of this is their very first scene. That's not a conversation, they're just yelling their character bios at each other. "You're college educated and I'm a soldier!" "I would never date you because you've been with so many other women!" "I'm different now and I love you, but you won't see any changes because I did all that character growth before the movie started!" I'm not even exaggerating, it's actually worse than that.
I enjoy this movie a lot. But I’m not somebody who knew the backstory on it at all. So I’m able to just put it on and sit down and be fully entertained.
I enjoyed the film in the theater, purchased it when it came to home video and have watched it several times. Wonder how well it was received in Europe?
This was another of those movies that I saw trailers for and went, "Eh." Apparently I wasn't the only one who thought so. Though I must say, hearing about this movie's backstory got me thinking about how oddly it mirrors that of Bong Joon-ho's Snowpiercer. Both were passion projects by filmmakers who loved the source material and did everything they could to make it happen their way but Snowpiercer ended up being the better movie and having a (modestly) better box office return. Also, missed opportunity for you to call the duck guys Hewey, Dewey, and Lewey.
Valyrian failed because its two lead actors had as much chemistry together as a block of wood. I have never, ever seen two actors- at least one of whom had a pretty good track record- do so badly in each others' presence. I could easily have believed that they actively hated each other on the set.
I totally agree with this statement. Watching it and the amount of time these two lead actors try to make things work... is just... pain. I also didn't find anything worth investing on the plot-point until act 3. By then, it's too late.
..which seems in part due to absolutely _terrible_ dialogue thoughout. If you're gonna compare Guardians of the Galaxy (1) to it, the vast difference in the quality of the dialogue has to be the first thing mentioned. Valerian sounded like it was dubbed by bored actors reading poor translations.
@ Let's not mince words, here. It was French. That was the culprit. It was French, and it kept its essential Frenchness throughout.
'Twas the froggies wot done it!
@@benb3928 Yes, i watched it both in english and german, the german translation is far less boring and lifts the movie up a bit, probably the reason this movie is more liked here, as far as i am concerned at least!
This feels like it would've worked better as a series.
agreed, especially since the plot feels so episodic
There's a Valerian and Laureline animated TV series and apparently it's pretty decent.
For me I think the male actor is not right
@@bukaneja I like the film, but the two leads have NO chemistry whatsoever.
DeHaan looks like he's 16 years old. He definitely doesn't look like a hardened veteran.
Cara looks like a teenager, too.
Director's barely disguised fetish lol
Not everyone has to be an ugly Brotherhood of Steel 2.0 to come off skilled. American audiences are dumb and into uglies
This exactly.
They look, speak, and act like two highschoolers on a _not_ a date.
So... what you are saying is that they are NOT supposed to be teenagers?
Maybe they would've worked if this was an origin story because if it was, that would've been ripe for exploration.
Me and my brother still have our tickets from seeing it in theaters. It's a precious memory of being the only two other people in an empty theater and just laughing at how bad it was. It did get us to read the original comics at least.
Wow, that's great. And yeah, after I saw the movie, I became interested in the comics, but have yet to read them.
The reason why VALERIAN feels like three different movies is because the director Luc Besson took sequences from different Valerian and Laureline storylines mainly because the more iconic moments of the comic series were from those stories. This would be like someone making a Batman movie with plot elements from BATMAN YEAR ONE, THE KILLING JOKE, DEATH IN THE FAMILY, THE DARK KNIGHT RETURNS and KNIGHTFALL and expect it to make sense. The movie would have been best served sticking to one story. By the way the character of Valerian in the comic book never had an origin story perse, he's already established as an intergalactic dashing hero, however Laureline is the one who does get an origin as she is from medieval times who Valerian encounters while on a time travelling mission. Although Valerian is supposed to maintain a cover so as not to alter the timeline ( ala Star Trek and the Prime Directive) Laureline discovers the truth about him, aides him on his mission and to preserve the timeline Valerian whisks her back to the future with him. Many storylines focused on Laureline and her fish out of water reactions to the world of Valerian and would soon develop into a storyline of Laureline exposing the political corruption surrounding Galaxity.
Batman v Superman took elements from The Dark Knight Returns and Death of Superman so there's that lol
Exactly. The issue is that it is possible to make a mashup of stories, but you have to find the right balance to make it work.
@@zeronightex It was a very weird choice by Snyder. The movie felt like it was trying to build up a rivalry between Batman and Superman, while also at the same time having to introduce the entire DCU. Should've picked a lane and stuck to it.
Trying to sell DeHaan as a suave action hero for starters lmao
Heroin addicted villain sure , f-able leading man , don’t think so … I mean vanilla sells look at Chris Pratt
That's honestly what tapped me out from paying attention to the rest of it.
Paired him with model Cara Delevingne, they look like malnourished brother and sister on ozempic
😂😂😂😂
@@jguifarro2826I don’t understand women. That Timothy Chaerlamange kid looks like a bi-sexual crack baby, but I’m told some girls find him attractive. 🤷♂️
Having the original author smack talk Fifth Element only for his own story's adaptation to get savaged is kind of cathartic to be honest.
Fifth Element is amazing, screw that guy.
100%
Must be some kind of meat popsicle
Hell yes
I think you nailed it. The movie is stunning to look at but as soon as the characters open their mouths, it's just cringey. So much wasted potential.
Every time I hear Rihana’s voice I experience sever nausea.
It always weirded me out how the two leads look related.
They definitely look like the most attractive sibling pair at the home for people with Downs Syndrome
They both clearly have FAS
Oh my GOD I thought I was the only one who thought so
Did y'all happen to watch the movie on shrooms and some THC nerd ropes
Valerian: *Proposes to his gf.
Okay I don’t know these characters. Tell me why I should care.
Valerian: *Has a saved record of all the girls he’s been with
No, I said why I SHOULD care!
May be the fastest a movie has destroyed my investment in a title character.
As someone who read the comics i can tell you that Valerian is a lovable jerk, sometimes a bit dumb and all the hard work ends up in the hands of Laureline who is always pretty bad ass. At least that's the dynamic of the duo in the first adventures, Pierre Christin eventually made Valerian a bit less dumb and more heroic.
Sometimes it's a bit like in the Get Smart TV series, where Maxwell Smart is a dumb and the agent 99 does all the job.
The Valerian comics are famous for being material of inspiration for Star Wars and there are panels from "The empire of a thousand planets" that were practically stolen by Star Wars and the sequels.
This movie it's a big meh, I watched on a big screen but it was a bit boring to my taste. The initial sequence it's astonishing and the little bit where they stole something on that weird dimension at the beginning it's really amazing and visually original.
After that the movie drags a lot and I think that the casting was really bad, no one fit really well. Maybe Cara Delevingne looks a bit like Laureline, but just the looks.
The reason you found the plot so convoluted and episodic it's because it's a mishmash of different stories or sequences/ideas from the comics. Like a greatest hits.
It's sad because Valerian and Laureline are some of the best science fiction comics ever made and this movie does little justice to the original material.
Not to mention, the leads were complete charisma black holes. Maybe he was going for making them unflappable professionals who've seen it all, but it just made them boring and not half as interesting as the world around them.
I really appreciate your honesty with not knowing the source material enough to make a full judgement, but you did a fantastic job!
I do recall reading an article ages ago saying that several plots from the original comics were jammed together to make this film, which explains the odd side quests arranged into the plot's overall narrative.
Using that Beatles song in the trailer was a stroke of genius. As someone who'd never heard it before, experience that paired with the visuals absolutely blew my mind and I knew I had to see it in theaters.
Dane DeHaan is not a leading man - he's a perfect tortured weirdo.
Also Laureline is supposed to be a medieval French girl; it should have been played by Isabella Adjani when she was 20.
As bad as the movie is the first five minutes are wonderful.
Moved me to tear a little when I first saw it (the alien encounters scene)
I hated the two leads. Could not stand them. I didn’t care what was happening to them.
They look weirdly related like siblings and they act so unlikable and disinterested. It's such a shame considering how beautiful the special effects and worlding building was
Worst-Casting-Ever. That's it. That's all.
The leads have what I would call anti-chemistry; a reaction that causes nausea. The movie tells you they are close but when together, they feel like they just met 10 minutes before the first scene started and they actively hate each other. I've never seen anything like it before, it is on the level of The Room.
@Ghostsprey no just two weird looking unlikeable nobody's. Cast two good looking cool people and the movie had a chance.
Could have been bad directing. They were constantly serious. Shooting a rat they had the same look as if they were longing for a kiss. What actor could be that untrained? Director.
even in 2017, i dont think Dane Deehan and Cara Delevigne alone have enough star power as a lead actor to sell this film.
I think the two main actors look too much alike, too young and have no chemistry with each other.
You mean like a 2010's version of that film with Travolta/Tomlin film "Moment by Moment", but not quite as disturbing visually.... somehow?
Ok, I have so much to say. As a person that GREW UP on Valerian&Laureline (as did most of northern Europe), this movie makes me scream for oh-so-many reasons. One point you do touch upon that - exactly as for John Carter - people go "Oh they ripped off Star Wars" when it's completely the opposite. Laureline wore the metal bikini in 1973, way before Leia. If you KNOW Valerian&Laureline, you can see it so deeply in Star Wars.
Second problem is, Besson had "Kinda" already done Valerian&Laureline, except he CALLED IT "fifth element". In this movie, the dynamics is correct, the designs of stuff is correct, and so on. 5:th element has the LOOK of V&L, heck, the space-taxi? Straight from a V&L comic, like, exactly like it.
This forced him to change so many of the designs, because if he used the proper designs people would have said "this looks just like 5:th element", and people would have scoffed. For that reason I cringe at all the changes and designs.
Thirdly, for someone seemingly "growing up w. the source material", Besson does V&L a giant disservice. The story steals a TON of the plot from the V&L album "Ambassador of the Shadows" but takes it's title from a totally different unrelated V&L comic (strange). But while the story is near identical in places, he shuffles the action of alien species around for literally NO REASON.
Fourthly, as you correcly surmise, the leads are ATROCIOUS. Valerion is heart-of-gold hero guy, but he is kinda stupid, and he kinda actually sucks, and is kinda clumsy. He THINKS he is saving the world, when in reality Laureline is doing ALL OF IT in the background.
The entirety of the comic of Ambassador of the Shadows, Valerian is unconcious, and Laureline does literally EVERYTHING. Many beats in the movie are identical to the comic, except SHE is doing al lof them. (Some of the things you dismissed as "side plots" are actually the parts that are key to the plot of the comic, but they are key beacuse they are about HER trying to find HIM, and it's the MAIN plot, not the "side quest"). I do admit it's fun to see some of the almost shot-for-shot remakes in this sequence, to be honest. Except of course, it's HER that uses a shape shifting alien in a space brothel to get some more info, NOT HIM.
Finally, the casting. The perfect Valerion would be a young Bruce Cambell. Chisel jawed, "hero" looking, but kinda dumb. A perfect Laureline... I dunno.... realize that in the comics, time travel is a huge part, and she's actually from 12:century French countryside, but was so badass she became a spatio-temporal agent.... anyway... I can't think of a modern actress... maybe a maturer version of Jessica Alba? Scarlett Johanseen? No, needs more gravitas and spunk.... The behavior between the characters should be almost exactly like in 5:th element. Like that scene when Leeloo says "Me, supreme being. ME protect YOU".
That's Laureline, exceept, she's not a supreme being, she just kicks THAT MUCH BUTT!!
Heck, a huge chunk of the story in the original comic is that V is doing it "by the book", and hence gets caught, knocked out and becomes something she needs to hunt down, and L doesn't give a crap about rules, regulations, and anything, and she just cleverly hunts him down, through a space station built by a million different races (hence all the different "worlds" they pass through - which is also straight from the comic, btw).
I *implore* you to read their comics. I literally grew up on them. You can find the online. They are great.
It always hurts when I see a bad movie that doesn’t flop due to obnoxious studios. Making a movie is hard! I’m glad it has some fans and most people acknowledge how cool the world/effects are. Shame it has a bad/cringy script.
The romantic leads look like siblings, it was a very uncomfortable watch at times.
That make me want to puke and vomit harder
I'm from Mexico and yet Valerian and Laureline were my childhood heroes alongside with Asterix & Obelix and Iznogud, those were comics my father bought at bookstores that came from the Spanish editions. They were amazing!
The plot from the move is a lose adaptation of the book "The Ambassador of the Shadows", but also takes elements from "The City of a Thousand Planets". "The Empire of a Thousand Planets" and "Welcome to Traumstadt" to a lesser extent. It's obviously a mishmash of concepts and ideas, that aligns perfectly with your impression that Luc just wanted to showcase as much as possible of what he liked, and just like a glutton kid in a candy shop, it's just a disaster. Plus the cast is a total miss, neither Valerian nor Laureline are remotely as pictured.
For me a better way to introduce them would have been a montage of how they met, the aventures they had together (with visuals from the books as trivia for those who know) while Valerian and Laureline narrate in a playful manner, ie:
Valerian: and so I saved the day!
Laureline: Yeah, right, if had not done this, you would still be stuck in that planet!
Valerian: Ok, I'll admit you helped a little...
And then you begin the movie with a clear idea what kind of adventurers they are. You can create your own adventure instead, a good movie, that can have some nods to the comics, not trying to remix things and making it so overcomplicated.
Also, the Star Wars comparisons are kinda valid, only George Lucas did take some inspiration from V&L, not the other way around, lol.
Also the director is DISGUSTING. He dated teenage girls and got one of them PREGNANT??? HOW DID HE NOT GO TO JAIL?
France.
Unrelated side note: did you know Roman Polanski lives there?
Because France.
@@TheDreamerBellehistory's worst Roman.
Since we don't have movie stars anymore, they went with...Dane DeHaan as leading man action hero 😬
This film deserved better,the most expensive INDIE film and European film,throughout all its ups and downs it still remains an underappreciated gem.(And in some ways the pinnacle of European filmmaking...)
Nobody who’s seen it are scratching their head over why it failed
I hate posting this because I love your work and celebrate the fact that a live human is narrating a youtube anymore, but it's pronounced "sim-IL-arity" not "sim-YOU-larity." (I'm not trying to be a grammar you-know-what, I'm just trying to spare my ears!) Love you and your content.
Lol I read the comments to see if anyone was bothered by this. Thank you...
I love this movie so much! It's so charmingly dorky. Once you learn to shake off the secondhand embarrassment you unavoidably get while watching it, it's very enjoyable.
This movie is to me what Sahara is to you. Thanks for covering it! 💜
A critic said Valerian has to be Han Solo but there is already a Han Solo, dunno if Solo was "inspired" by Valerian of just his feeling, we need to see the source material of both movies to know if that was part of the issue.
7:35 you have an inaccuracy. The novel that Disney's 'John Carter' was developed from is not titled "John Carter of Mars". E.R. Burrough's novel was titled "Princess of Mars", John Carter is the protagonist but is in no way titular.
Edit: syntax
i believe he says it right in the video about john carter but forgot in this video
Did it feel really good to catch that? Little rush in your belly?
Right, but his POINT stands. Had they titled it "John Carter OF MARS" maybe SOMEONE would have lifted one finger, realized it's a literally ONE HUNDRED (100!!!!!!) year old story, and not say STUPID CRAP like "this ripped off Star Wars"...
No way this dude is getting childish over me pointing out the correct title of one of my favorite novels lol pathetic
Ive very rarely seen a film where i thought "this 1 scene was more enjoyable than the rest of the film" and the opening of this Film followed by what happens next is a textbook example.
Also this film/A Cure for Wellness/and Amazing Spiderman 2 proved 3 strikes for trying to make Dane Dehaan happen when it wasnt gonna happen
No one wants to admit it but Pixar's Up also suffers from the opening montage overshadowing everything else.
@ender7278 I agree. Up legitimately is remembered for that opening sequence but people seem to have trouble remembering how forgettable the rest of the movie is.
Movie with such a great premise. Story that held a ton of potential and was filmed beautifully, tons of effort went into the world building. The script itself and dialogue however, lacked entirely and wasted what could have been great; is a shame.
I genuinely believe this would have been better as a Tvshow, the characters would have been fully fledged out and the story might have been cohesive
i like dane dehaan, he's the reason i watched the movie. i also believe he was horribly miscast.
he just works better when cast as a villain, or at least a pretty troubled hero. the quippy, star lord-type hero does not fit him.
I think the reason there is no romantic chemistry between the lead actors is because Cara Delvigne is a militant lesbian. They should have cast a straight actress to play a straight character.
You talk a lot about failed franchise starters. Have you thought about doing videos on unexpected successful franchise starters like Pirates of the Caribbean, Iron-Man, or Sonic the Hedgehog?
I like the actors in this but omg, very hard watch, needed few more drafts
Very intriguing history of this Luc Besson joint. 🤔
With this having a budget of $180 million, and _Megalopolis_ having a budget of $120 million, why is _Megaolopolis_ still usually described as “the most expensive independent movie”? 😮
Should have been a series tbh...also 💯 on the leads feeling more like siblings, cause I was like "huhh?" when I saw them kiss.
@7:40 I have to say, the French original title of the graphic novels is just “Valerian, agent spatio-temporel”. The title comes from the episode “The Empire of a Thousand Planets”.
Regarding Luc Besson: I don't get why it's okay to call child groomers "gross", but child murderers are okay?!? 😢
12:59 imo Cara Delevingne is a good actress with bad luck. She got the female lead role in Paper Towns by auditioning with a scene from the book that's very charged and emotional. Her character just seems happy and distant in the movie ending (which was a reshoot). She even admitted during an interview that she didn't feel enough empathy watching her performance in the final cut.
You get glimpses of how good she can be in the moments where she's allowed to be sad, or scared, or excited. At the end when Laureline asks Valerian to follow his heart instead of his orders as a soldier, she takes this pause where you can see how disappointed she is, and scared that she could lose him forever because they fundamentally disagree on the right thing to do. I still remember that scene years later because I thought it was only time I could actually see what Laureline was feeling. The rest of the movie plays like she's suppressing her emotions for the sake of their mission. I was shocked when I read Laureline's backstory after seeing the movie. If the plot had been her going to the future and reacting to everything for the first time then Cara Delevingne could have been a fantastic choice.
I don't think it's her fault. I think it's a symptom of this idea that "strong" characters are always stoic and determined and in control of themselves. Admirable? ...Maybe? But it isn't relatable.
Relasing on the same weekend as a Nolan movie is crazy!
12:57
Cara Delevingne, IMO, can’t act to save her life.
A big-budget sci-fi/action film not based on an already popular IP? Crazy.
This is a french movie with a hollywood budget. And by french I mean the vibe and the sense of humor, and even the casting. Those two are not Hollywood attractive - they are french attractive - (good looking but kinda sickly and ordinary). Even the lack of chemistry and the arrogance are french. I had the feeling I was watching some old french comedy about love and existentialism. And I love those type of movies, but the clash with the Hollywood blockbuster part of it was too strong.
Underrated comment. Movie makes sense in this perspective
Have you heard of this film called Antebellum? You should cover that one next.
I haven't heard of that movie, I'll look into it
simularities?
I really wanted this movie to be good. The visuals were absolutely *awesome* …and I completely agree with you about the casting being bad. Dehaan and Delavingne truly looked like siblings so their flirting just felt very Hapsburg-esque in its portrayal which is So. Very. Gross. It’s such a shame. I wanted this movie to succeed too 🥺 it had so much potential.
I honestly did not mind Cara in this film. But the rest of the cast, eh.
Although I didn't watch this movie or read the comics, I did watch the cartoon series "Time Jam: Valerian & Laureline" based on those comics when I was younger. According to Wikipedia, this show has a different tone and story from the source material, but I still think it's great.
Time Jam has a very interesting plot, Valerian and Laureline have a much better relationship, sometimes the tone of the show gets really dark and what I liked the most about this cartoon is how it cleverly explained various political actions which could happen in real life, so the younger viewers could understand them, which somehow I didn't notice them at first when I was a kid.
Apparently, on RUclips there are all episodes available in English dub, but I can't tell if the voice acting is good or if the voices are matched well to the characters because I watched Time Jam in Polish dub.
I can recommend this show if anyone is interested, because I think it's worth its time.
A terrible title. A bad trailer. A property nobody knew or wanted to watch. Two lead actors who can't act. Two lead actors with no star power or charisma....
the only thing i remember from this movie is the rihanna dance and transformation
I really like the movie for its Art Design, visuals and jokes. Its So much more creative than all those superhero movies
What an infuriating response from Busson. I laughed out loud until I realized the dude wasn't joking.
I can name many MCU and DCU movies that are far worse but people still watched them in droves. People LOVE mediocrity.
I sincerely hope John Carter (the character) gets his day in the sun.
The first three Barsoom books are awesome.
I might not think it's a great movie, but I had fun seeing it in theaters. Particularly the first five minutes felt wonderful. But the issue I had with it is it didn't feel very cohesive, more like it should have been a short series instead of a movie.
agreed
Why Tut Failed In 2015 Spike TV Aired The historical Miniseries Tut starring Avan Gogia who you know as Beck from Nickelodeon's Victorious who plays the titular King Tut While the show tries to portray Ancient Egypt Accurately especially the Incest part but comes off more 300 less Ancient Egypt and that's people turned on the show also Gogia acting was MID at best trying to be King Leonidas leaning on the 300 comparisons some more the point Spike TV's heart was In the right place but didn't pay off at the end now It's lost media It could muster the same rating as IZombie, Into The Badlands or Dark Matter
Gave me great 5th Element vibes at first, but damn, I just couldn't stand both protags...
This movie and Birds of Prey are the two movies I can remember falling asleep to in the theater.
10:06 "Now pop quiz, hotshot. There's a bomb on a bus. Once the bus goes over 50 miles an hour the bomb is armed..."
I love this movie! Not because it's necessarily good, it just looks so good! The two things they nailed are the visuals and the lore/world. If someone made another movie set in this universe I'd watch it.
I remember enjoying this when I first watched it but I was drinking quite a bit back then...
My brain says i shouldn't like this movie but i ended up enjoying. I just dont know why.
Not the best movie ever, of course, but it's a good movie.
loved the concept of this movie
Passion Project is an instant kiss of death. What do you mean you're only making this movie for yourself. That's literally the opposite of your job.
I actually liked Valerian, yeah some characters were a bit cliche, but that is part of the film's soul, so if you and watch it as a Space Opera that is serious, nope, thats not the way to enjoy it. I think it was a fun film, entertaining, and of good quality 👌🏼 Could have been better, but wasn't bad by no means.
The only thing I remember about this film is that Cara spent most of the film half naked and that she has funny eyebrows. And I guess there were aliens or something.
For my part, I think it failed because for all its awesome sci-fi imagery, world-building, action, and some fun characters, the main character was the most unlikable, whiny, useless, annoying, incelly sack of box office poison possibly ever. Had it just been Laureline it might've been a classic to rank alongside The Fifth Element. I look forward to the video!
Having just watched it, 100% agreed with you, and very well said!
When I stop to think about it, I can only associate this Cara Delavigne girl with big commercial or critical failures, so why is she even considered an A-list star? 🤔
Because it is not the main actress'fault if a movie, the script, director etc, is bad
@LynnHermione yeah, I agree. But what good projects she had?
I guess that's why she rarely acts anymore, at least not leading parts in big budget movies. Her acting iin valerian specifically stands out awkwardly
@@undermoonstars and that witch or whatever from Suicide Squad? Cringeworthy at best
@ ahh yes her lukewarm attempt in a villan role clearly a very memorable performance lol
Those character designs go hard ngl. Dang. I feel like even now this would do better then it did, but maybe with some more focus.
The man who made Leon the Professional has a history of dating kids? Well color me surprised, what a mysterious world we live in....
I loved that movie... But yeah... When you put into perspective that it was written by a creeper it certainly hits a little 'different'...
At least he is not puff diddy.
Separate art from artist, far far apart on this one.
I still find it amazing that they somehow made a 25 year old Cara Delavingne look 15 in that suit. I enjoyed her and Bear Grylls. She should do more survival shows!
I never saw the movie, but it did interest me enough to read a chunk of the source material. I'm not crazy about it but it's enjoyable enough that I can see why kids could really like it
So I read a lot of Valerian in my teenage years and while I didn't read the whole series, but I know enough to be very confused by some of the adaptation choices. Especially with Besson saying quite loudly it was his passion project and it's no like they were movie executives above him to tell him what to do about the source material. A massive omission is that the movie has no mention of time travel and it's incredibly important to the setting. Laureline is literally an 11th-century peasant that now lives in the distant future (Her backstory in the movie as far as I can tell is just that she went to an Ivy League school, which is a lot more boring).
The story that is the closest to the movie is the ambassador of Shadow, while it's not the worst choice. There's this issue where it's not. It's at the point that the comic started to move away from more straight forward pulp sci-fi and changes things around, the plot of the original comic is mostly about Laureline saving Valerian after him being in the driver seat after a few adventures. Since it's their first adventure in the movie it has to shift it to them both saving each other because the title character would otherwise have nothing to do. It shifts a few things around (Like in the original, the aliens at the center of the plot created the station instead of humanity, it,s also named Central Point instead of ALpha)
I know this movie's got a ton of flaws but since I'm a sucker for these types of films, of course I enjoyed it! I would've liked it more if it had a better director to be honest
Everyone has bad movies they like, and I admit, this is one of mine. The weakest point for me is DeHaan and Delevigne and the lack of chemistry/tension.
I really liked this movie and the two protagonists a lot. Very different from the kind of heroes we're used to seeing triple A movies. Just a fun adventure all the way.
But I remember at the time this movie got hate from the get go. When there's a compaign of thate like this to something, you don't have a chance.
I personally felt it was okay. In terms of animation and those weird Platypus things, it was amazing. But as a movie, it could’ve been worse.
I recall watching this film on its opening weekend after getting a $5 movie ticket coupon from buying The Giver (another bad film, by the way) on DVD.
I recall being so bored and almost sleepy while watching it, only being woken up by the explosions.
I genuinely love this movie. It has flaws, no doubt about it, but I always see myself coming back to it more than any other Sci-Fi movie or series. As much as I adore DeHaan, he doesn't work as a heroic lead, however he does fit the profile of the character so it's really. We may be getting a sequel anyways.
For me, the repeats are: Firefly (TV), Edge of Tomorrow, The Matrix, Dark City, and Brazil
I have to admit it was very unique and interesting. But just hard to watch and get through.
Watching this made me realize that in a vacuum a lot of these moments are absolutely stunning I still think the opening 5 minutes of the movie is incredible and if it's just a short film I think It's perfect and then the rest of the movie happens and there's so much that just jumps around with an interesting plot points uninteresting characters with no chemistry. But man just seeing individual clips of stuff it is truly stunning.
I have BEEN waiting on this video😁🍿!!!!!!
When it came out, I felt the reason why the film wasn't going to work was because of a similar reason why John Carter hadn't worked: the fact that there are already so many films inspired by it that doing a direct adaptation of it would make it be redundant as a result. I heard that George Lucas cited Valerian as an influence of Star Wars, like John Carter of Mars had also had it's influence on him. But, I know I was wrong on both assessments, and both films were both enjoyable and entertaining in my opinion. To me, I feel sorry they both failed.
I love the film despite all its failings because even years later in retrospect it doesn't just feel like another generic slop sci-fi film and actually has stuck in my mind as unique even if I cant remember anything about the plot or characters lol
Also the main protagonist has been with all these women, but the actor gives him zero charisma or confidence. I buy Grima Wormtongue getting a harem before Valerian
I don't know you, but I will _never_ forgive you for putting that image in my head.
Robbie Williams is not just a super star in the UK but in many countries outside of the US 😂 pretty sure his biopic was not aiming in US audiences
But the movie flopped in the UK also? his hardcore fans wanted to see him in human-form not a cgi monkey lol
I am an American fan and I was one of five people in my theater. Better Man is a great film and I wish it had a better reception!
I grew up in Europe with the comics, this was sad to see when I went to the theater. And I had my hopes up when I heard Luc Besson was directing
Nice review. I watched it and I got lost in the middle and was asking myself, what are these guys looking for again? Like you said, it looked like a bunch of smaller stories smashed together like if they had collected a few second highlights of a whole TV series
Writing before watching. For me, the two leads were very bad casting choices. And it's been a while since I watched the film and I don't remember who the antagonist/villan was. Now let's see what you think.
Also, thanks for the video.
I generally liked any scene that didn't have both the main characters. As soon as they were together, it was terrible.
The best example of this is their very first scene. That's not a conversation, they're just yelling their character bios at each other.
"You're college educated and I'm a soldier!"
"I would never date you because you've been with so many other women!"
"I'm different now and I love you, but you won't see any changes because I did all that character growth before the movie started!"
I'm not even exaggerating, it's actually worse than that.
Biggest thing I took from this is that it was based on a comic series. Had no idea!
I enjoy this movie a lot. But I’m not somebody who knew the backstory on it at all. So I’m able to just put it on and sit down and be fully entertained.
I pirated this one in 2017 then I watch this twice in 1 day, I like it actually
I 😁 remember this movie it was great
I enjoyed the film in the theater, purchased it when it came to home video and have watched it several times. Wonder how well it was received in Europe?
This was another of those movies that I saw trailers for and went, "Eh." Apparently I wasn't the only one who thought so.
Though I must say, hearing about this movie's backstory got me thinking about how oddly it mirrors that of Bong Joon-ho's Snowpiercer. Both were passion projects by filmmakers who loved the source material and did everything they could to make it happen their way but Snowpiercer ended up being the better movie and having a (modestly) better box office return.
Also, missed opportunity for you to call the duck guys Hewey, Dewey, and Lewey.