"Healing is like an onion. As you process through one layer of trauma to release the pain and heal, a new layer will surface. One layer after another layer will bring up new issues to focus on. Pace yourself. Only focus on one layer at a time." Dana Arcuri
Timestamps 1). The mean voices 0:42 2). A broken home 1:47 3). A stab in the back 2:44 4). The hatred of people 3:40 5). Through the red light 4:36 6). Let yourself heal 5:22 7). Establishing safety 5:54 8). Reconstruction 6:06 9). Integration 6:25 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I’ve experienced bullying. People used to spread rumors about me, cybor bully me, physically attack me, and use me. Teachers also treated me differently than other students. I still have low self esteem and I still have trouble knowing for sure if people are actually my friend or if they are just using me.
I'm still bitter over an incident with my mom, it makes me feel so defenseless whenever I remember it. I hate parties because it's loud, crowded, and it makes me super uncomfortable. Before the pandemic, my mom would throw parties for New Year's Eve with alcohol for friends and family so I would try to stay hidden away in my room. One time she thought it'd be a great idea to have everyone rush into my room and yell "Happy New Year! " at the top of their lungs. I was curled up in the corner, crying and hyperventilating because of how overwhelmed I was by the all the people and noise. How did she react, you may ask? Instead of comforting me and trying to understand why I felt that way, her drunk ass kept telling me to stop crying and that I was "overreacting" and "being sensitive", something that hurts a lot to hear because of how many times I've been told that as a small child. I have such a hard time expressing sadness and anger, when I do it feels I'm drowning in it. Like it'll never stop and the tears would flow forever. Whenever I try to mention it and ask for her to apologize, she tells me that I shouldn't have acted that way because that was my family. I have severe anxiety and it makes no exceptions for anyone, and those people aren't even close to me! This just make me bottle up my emotions more, I'm always misunderstood by others and I can't just explain how I feel because I just fall apart.
I have some trauma of people leaving me due to my mother. When I was young (around 7), I was threaten by her that she would throw me to the orphan and she did drive all the way to the orphanage to leave me there but ended up not doing it. Around 9 I think? She told me to pack my bag and said that I'll go to the orphan to stay, I was terrify and resist. Her friend drive me to the orphan since she was mad at me and doesn't want to see me and I ended up staying at the orphan for a day, but that's enough to traumatized me since I was born in a single mother house and my only parent I had was my mother. After that event, whenever she came late to fetch me from somewhere or come home late without telling me anything, I'll keep thinking all kinds of scenarios from the best to the worst as the time goes by. By late I mean is like half hour late from planned if she's gonna fetch me, if it's coming home late then it's around an hour half. She did 'apologize' but it's halfheartedly she told me that I shouldn't be looking at the past and stuff. I know it's just some minor things to others but to me it's really effecting me a lot.
@@HarutoNanase it’s not a minor thing. It’s very important and traumatizing event. Even by reading it I felt bad. I’m very sorry for you to have such an experience at your early age. I am really sorry. I hope you are doing well now with this memory in your heart, I wish you all the best
Have you considered by any chance, that you may have Asperger’s Syndrome? You sound just like me, being specially sensitive to loud noises, and feeling overwhelmed by crowds of people (and being called sensitive by others too, because it seems no one around us feels the way we do!) It might be worth it to explore the possibility, for me it was a game changer to learn why I struggle with sensory stimuli, good luck!
@@HarutoNanase Dang no that's scary. Nine years old! She probably thought it was a joke or prank or something, actually leaving you at the orphanage for a day. What a cruel thing to do to a child.
Thank you for the suggestion! Do you have any personal opinions on this yourself? What do you think are some good/bad coping mechanisms for mental disorders?
@@Psych2go tbh idk which is why I would want this video, to learn the best ways to cope and possibly share with my friend with ptsd some good coping mechanisms
@Psych2go one of the bad ones is osd in my opinion because that's one of my coping mechanisms and it's ruining my life slowly(sorry my English is not that good)
Don’t be surprised if it starts to feel odd when you slip back into an unhealthy habit. It is self-respect speaking up, reminding you to take care of what you love: You.
Thank you for shining a light on this subject. Too many people think you have to be in seriously bad (think war torn country) situation to have PTSD, and it's simply not true. I see all the comments of those who leave them, and your pain is valid. You are loved. 💜
@@Psych2go it may be different for me, being autistic and technically dealing with cptsd, but I am constantly feeling hypersensitive to the smallest of things off and on. I've had to learn to pause and give my brain time to logically process once I can gain control and learn sometimes I can't help it when I scream when something throws me off guard. It's usually dealing with benign things, like a bug crawling on me will make me jump and scream most times... Even if I'm really not afraid. I know I didn't answer with a short and clear answer, but it took a late diagnosis and a lot of interoception (I think this is the right word...) to get where I am. It hasn't come easy, and sadly I feel like I've gotten more help from channels like yourself than professionals... But I think that is because autism in females still very much in development. I do wish to thank you for your existence. For making this content easy to digest and translating it into different t languages, so we all can hopefully have access to it. Edit: interoception wasn't quite what I meant there, introspection. But I've also noticed I tend to be more sensitive to fluctuations in temperature and also feeling in the body... So I guess that also is true
1-I don’t know if it qualifies as bullying but many of my classmates back in my school days were often rude, bratty or plain unbearable to be around. Maybe it was me being too sensitive or overwhelmed by everything else about school but I could not be near practically anyone in my classroom other than my two best friends and some friends that were in other classrooms. One boy in particular often swore, got into fights and even harassed classmates and teachers. I don’t know what is he doing now that we all graduated. 2-Mom and dad divorced when I was a toddler but they don’t fight. In fact, they’re pretty amicable despite no longer being married. Dad remarried and gave me my little sis but mom had other two boyfriend before breaking up with them too and I had to tell her to not date anymore. Since the initial divorce happened when I was too young, I don’t remember much. 3-I’ve never had a date so I don’t know exactly how it feels to be cheated on. Even then, I know it must be awful. 4-Wasn’t discriminated myself but I actively advocate against it because it’s just plain wrong to judge someone over something they were born with. It’s however a part of my religious trauma because the most fundamentalists members of any religion often use their beliefs and dogmas to justify discrimination (Needs no explaination). 5-As someone who was caught in an earthquake back in mid 2018, this is the one that I relate the most. The incident caused me to develop a generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). So now, I try my hardest to avoid reading news or certain online comments because they trigger my inner dread (despite me not minding them in the past). My fears often come to haunt me and pelt my mind with worst case scenarios such as another possibly worse earthquake destroying my building and killing me. PS: The quake in question wasn’t catastrophic but the mere thought of the building crumbling down on me was enough to mentally scar me.
I don't think there's something as too sensitive, everyone is different and unique. Science and psychology mostly are now recognising that every negative experience can leave a wound. Going through an experience that others faced and recovered from quickly doesn't make you slow or acting like the victim: more sensitive people or detail-oriented people take in more data and simply have more emotions and informations to deal with. So even if some people might push you to simply "get over it", to me you're really brave and have come a long way and i tell you from the bottom of my heart: you should be really proud of yourself. (edit: typo)
I understand everything I am Muslim but my dad and mom are💔now I am very sad 😔 all kids have their own problems even me and lucky people boys are mean but some are not there are lots of people that are bad we maybe don't understand but some people do understand and some parents are mean and crazy 😅 but if I have secrets I keep it in my head 😢 Everyone has a secret but they can tell the ones that tell theirs maybe not all people are bad I think I always wanted to be nice and I try do the things that your heart dezayers❤ And that good we know 😊 Having trouble is a part of life 😊😊😊
Oh god...i definitely went thru worst bullying which affected all through my schooling which forced me into a shell n later no one even knew i existed except two of my friends I'm going to college this year and trust me my mom is super worried what if i stay the same but i think I'm getting better or at least I'm trying...uk the constant feel of being neglected from the whole class... And thanks for coming to my vent session👍🏻
Let me advise this: Go get help and do the homework it takes to get over it. I fought that feeling for 35 years and though I've had a fulfilled life, bullying in junior high school damaged my social life...for most of my life. I allowed those people to have that much power over me for so long. Then I decided that I didn't want to feel like a victim anymore. I spoke with a faith-based therapist, which helped me. I also joined a martial arts club. I met cool people there who accepted me and taught me, made me stronger. They're very accepting of everyone, especially beginners. Work through this as soon as you can so that you aren't letting it anchor you your whole life.
@@Thomas116-m2n I'm actually planning on joining martial arts class too in a few days i think that'll help me with my confidence n being social and I'm so glad it helped you as well! Thanks a lot for ur advice I'm never letting anyone take so much power over me 😭
You missed a very important part: you might never be 'okay' but you will be okay. You find a new equilibrium and even though you might not be happy, you'll feel like you can move on from it. I was deeply traumatized sexually as a child. It still hits me sometimes 30 years later, resulted in PTSD and chronic depression. I will probably never be 'okay' like I imagine other people are. But I can be okay for me, and if I have a bad day... well, tomorrow might be better.
@@elizabethval835 pray in one hand. Poop in the other. See which fills up faster. I appreciate your sentiment, but superstitious belief is WHY I was molested, so please keep your bronze age mythology to yourself. thank you.
I suffered with bullying for a big part of my life, and when I finally left that school (stayed there until I was ten), I couldn't trust anyone. I was an easy target because I have angry control problems, and at that time it was even worse, so I got angry and I became the bad guy every single time, teachers and the principal blamed me for everything, so to this day I hide my emotions a lot, have trouble expressing myself for fear of what others will say and have trouble trusting people since even friends I thought were gonna be there for me, started bullying me as well at that time. More recently, I'm forcing myself to open up and trust people better, and trying to express through the music I like and my life is so much better now, but those scars are still there, and I don't think they're ever going away
I have went through all of these experiences since I was really young, and continue to be reminded of them today and it still feels like the wound is bleeding. Stay safe everyone!
I'm really glad you started to add tips on how to deal with stuff! Admittedly, I think I needed that kick right now as I had been stuck in a cycle of negative self talk these days... in part about #1 and #2 and other stuff...
@@Psych2go So now also getting into the therapist role instead of just pointing people towards one? :P Ah, just kidding. I always hated my birthdays and my 30th is coming up, so that combined with a rather jarring valley of loneliness has caused me to ruminate about about all the stuff I missed out on that other people my age must have experienced, all because of my avoidant anxieties. And in particular how all my attempts to get out more, pick up a new hobby and try to use it to connect with others... somehow resulted in absolutely nothing and I'm pretty much still where I started... 11 years ago.
I was bullied for two years at my old school and it still affects me even though I transfered to a new school a year ago and I just hope It doesn't transfer in adulthood for me... I'm getting proper treatment from therapy and I really hope it fully heals me...
When I went into Kindergarten in 1991, the ADA had only just been codified into law. I am blind I. One eye, and my acuity is 20/500 in the other. I have epilepsy and am autistic and hard of hearing as well, though this didn’t become an issue until high school. From kindergarten through the end of 6th grade, I was bullied by most everyone at school, including my teachers. I was pushed downstairs, subjected to verbal torture because of my differences, tripped, pushed off playground equipment, had my things stolen from my backpack, had papers I had completed were taken and I was the one punished for this. I was even told by the school principal that it would be easier on the teachers for me to go to the state school for the blind, at 10, and this is 7 hours away from where I lived. There were 2 girls who were kind to me and we are still friends. At the school for the blind, I was shunned by some of my dorm mates because I would monologue about books, music and gaming. In high school, I stayed to myself mostly as I really had no commonality with my friends. I love languages and was well known at high school for singing Gaelic tunes and such. It wasn’t easy and it is very traumatizing. I have been a victim of pedophilia, and my son’s conception was not my choice. I have learnt empathy through these experiences and though I often wish things had been different and that I’d made better choices as a young adult. I have to believe there was a purpose for all of it, and perhaps it is to end the cycle of abuse that haunts my parents and I turn was unintentionally abused my them. I want to end this cycle with Rory and show him that he is a good person who deserves all the love and respect I. The world and nothing less. He too is autistic, and I have done my very best to make certain that he gets the help he deserves that i didn recurve. I finally had to decide if I would choose mt path or let my mental disorders dictate my actions. I chose the former. It’s a struggle daily, but it’s worth every second. I just wish there were some online therapists that accepted Medicaid in Texas. Anyway, sorry for the wall of text:)
1-When I got bullied I didn't care and when they tried to take it physical, I beat both of them up (lol) 2- Parents Happily Married 3- Been left by friends and lovers (more often then not sadly) but never cheated on 4- Black, nationality kinda confusing since like 3 countries don't give me full citizen rights, 5- Things still happening and I'd rather be laughing then crying. Being constantly left by friends sucks but that's what happens when you force yourself to be social. Loneliness as addicting as it is quite frankly, sucks. I just wish I could find people who want to be my friend as much as I do. A lover at this point is just unrealistic without any good friends so yeah.
My traumatic event happened during the time my parents where "taking a break" from each other. While my dad was living on his own, during one of my visits with him he invited his gf over (dad and mom were STILL married) and he told me (I remember this because it confused me so much): "You're going to see me kiss her, but it doesn't mean anything. I still love your mom, but you can't tell her about this." WTF?! I was like 8 or 9! My dad put me in a situation I was NEVER SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT!😠😡🤬
I wished my trauma was only that, but mine were physical abuse of my mother (my dad hurt my mom) and mental abuse for me and my sisters (also my dad) then divorce, I was 3 years old when my parent were divorced but I still remember my dad hitting my mom when I was 3 years old 😣 btw my dad now know that was horrible what he did and want to see us more often and me too 😞 (it was a bit hard to me to write that even if that was 11 years ago)
I can definitely relate to the divorce bit. I was 12 when it happened but oh boy do I have some massive baggage from it. I remember trying to get some sleep since I had school in the morning and hearing my mom shouting at my dad through the phone and I can hear the argument through the floor in my bedroom which was right above the kitchen. So yeah, trying to sleep with that going on was nearly impossible for me. I think it’s why to this day I can’t stand when a fight happens or people start to yell and scream at each other. It’s a huge trigger for me and I just want to get out of the area that it’s happening in and try to calm down and stop my brain from going haywire.
Here are the 5 traumatic events: 1) The mean voices 2) A broken home 3) A stab in the back 4) The hatred of people 5) Through the red light (a physical trauma)
I have been going through my own trauma recovery over the last 5 or so years. I am finally feeling some movement forward in my Integration stage - I am using my RUclips channel to inspire people to make positive changes in their life. This video is a great place of information to start on a self-progression journey. Thank you for making this 💝
In my experience, society doesn't give a shit if one needs time to heal. If I am not up and ready a day after whatever happened, I am not worth the trouble (quote from my siblings)
I almost shed a tear watching this video. As a victim of post trauma disorder, I know how hard it is to let go of something that's affected your mentality. How things like fear have control over your life. But I try to remain calm, and look towards the positives, I try not to go back to what my enemies have caused, or my past drama like situations I've had on social media. The trauma I experienced was my personal information being exposed onto the internet. An enemy of mine leaked my full name on various social media sites. Because my name isn't common, it's very likely someone can find where I live according to the name that was leaked.
We're so sorry that you had a horrible experience with PTSD and what sounds like an invasion of privacy. How are you doing now? How are you coping with the aftereffects of the PTSD and the traumatic event?
@@Psych2go Well this pain has affected me throughout most of 2022. The person who leaked my info to the internet showed no remorse for his actions and would continue to harass me all through 2022 and into the very beginning of 2023. He told me back in June 2022, if I blocked him he would continue to spam my full name to as many people I communicate with online. I had no choice but to continue having this individual friended on my friends list. Several months passed and by February 2023, I finally blocked that individual. However, that event still haunts me to this day and I would shed a tear if I ever get reminded of that horrifying event. 😔
I’m 32 and I feel like my whole life has been dedicated to healing. My father was an emotional infant and very explosive which was manageable with my mother who was loving and nurturing, but then she died when I was around 9 and my father couldn’t cope and had no child rearing skills and a huge temper. I remember struggling so bad I would just sit at the kitchen table, not knowing how to communicate the distress I was in desperate for someone to see something was wrong but nobody got me help. I had undiagnosed face blindness, autism and transsexualism and had to discover all this for myself in adulthood. I also have a disorganised attachment style which I’m still working through. On the upside, I have gained a lot of wisdom and have reached a good place in my life, it’s a lot of work for one person but it is doable.
My parents divorced when I was 7, and that was a good thing. It helped me with personal growth, since I could be completely away from my verbally violent father some of the time. The first time I was told about I cried a lot, but that was because it wasn't worded correctly. My dad said it as: "Mom is moving." Like my mom was just moving away and I'd never see her again. I'm happy my parents divorced, that has been a really positive thing in our family.
Can you make a video about stuttering and its mental health impact? I feel like there is a taboo around stuttering and my mental health has definitely been damaged by my stuttering because of the intense anxiety and shame it leaves. Btw, love your videos! They are extremely important in this day and age
3. Started a relationship when I wasn't looking for it, it just happened. 3 to 4 weeks after fights started, growing in intensity with each one ended to a point where I was insulted and felt that I had to measure each word and action, as we kept getting back together. It came to an end about 4 months after it started. 3 weeks later she tried to come back, saying she still loved me very much, but the trauma was there and I just couldn't go there again. One month after this conversation, I learned she started a new relationship with someone I considered a long time friend. Neither of them had any respect or dignity to talk to me. It felt, and still feels like a stab in the back from both of them. From other people in our group of friends, I received zero support or even listened to them saying they were happy for them. It's been hard to process all of this, even with mental health professionals helping.
When I got diagnosed with autism at age 7/8 (so quite young) I got abused, emotional neglected, mentally abused, emotionally abused and even physically abused. They mocked me for it, yelled at me for legit no reason and I was the black sheep, and the scapegoat. My little sister, 8, spoiled brat, was pampered and was the golden child. I still have problems with my mom, I think she’s toxic. She always thinks „Yall blame me for everything“ „I’m always alone“ „You (me) never admit your Mistakes and blame them on others, and in reality, she’s the one doing it. Then last October childwelfare (but first police) people came at 23:00 and took us away for 2 weeks because my parents were both drunk and had a fight, my mom threw my dads Tablet against a wall and my father threw my SCHOOL IPAD against the wall, almost hitting my sister. That’s when she called the police. My parents are divorced since then, and my dad (a narcissist) didn’t change his opinion of me. I’ve always lived in a dysfunctional family and broken family, our flat often was dirty and what else am I supposed to do?
I was well liked in high school and had lots of friends, but I was really insecure about it because I was the weird kid in elementary school who was scapegoated for everything, so sometimes it was hard to trust it. I still have trouble keeping friends.
I have rsd so I always take criticisms badly. I have so much trauma because of it. a person can say one word and it not even be directed at me or be mean but I will spiral because of it. its taken a while to deal with it and your videos have definitely helped. thank you :)
Hi!! Just here to spread good vibes! 1. You are enough. Just because you ARE. 2. You are strong. The fact that you are here, alive, that's enough. You are strong for being, even if you think that you didn't put an effort on it. 3. Our brain likes to trick us: what you think about yourself might not be what you are. Humans are sometimes driven by emotions that our brain tries to comprehend and name and viceversa, we think something and then we feel something based on that thought. 4. If your emotions are too much too handle, remember that they are just emotions: they are not bad and they are not good either! They just are, and it's in our power to decide how to act based on them. 5. Sometimes, we can't control our actions, and we find ourselves driven by the emotions or unable to control ourselves: it's fine. There are things that are out of our control ans it's fine. What's important is that you learn about your mistakes, discover yourself, and of course, forgive yourself to step into the path of healing. If you hurted someone, you can change that behavior. If someone hurted you, that pain doesn't define who you are as a person. Healing is a long and painful journey. It is. And nobody will tell you otherwise unless ther are lying. But you are strong, strong enough to do this. You are as capable as any other human being to get through this. And if your life is too much for you to handle: speak to others and find comfort in others. It's scary to trust, I know, but as humans we need to live in company of others, we need the other person (and that's ok!). Talking about what's bothering you with a family member/friend/partner is very important. And of course, if you can afford it or are able to, it's also important to seek help from a specialist. Therapy IS for everyone... But not every therapist is for everyone. Find the person who understands you and want what's best for you. Lots of hugs and/or pats in the head for everyone! Have a nice day ❤️ Love you all
My parents divorced when I was 7, and at the time I took it really lightly and well, because first of all I was young and innocent, I wasn't aware of the consequences of a divorce, plus that way I thought that my parents would stop fighting. I think I have internalised all of the negative thoughts of my parents divorce until now. Today I'm 16 and my parents still struggle to communicate, they are not getting along at all, they fight whenever they see each other and just keep criticizing each other, talk about the other negatively with me. Now I'm just getting really tired of their conflicts, plus sometimes I have to be the messenger between them, and I'm always in the crossfire, as I can't choose a side. Now I just have to stop listening to their critics and find a solution to this... I have realized all of this not so long ago, thanks to these videos and to a therapist. Thank you for this ^^
My beloved lady at age 32 passed away the following day after a wild night out. Our last moments together were being mean to one another and fighting. I've never felt this pain of grief before or since.
I have experienced all of these... except the stab in the back was one of my closest friends who instigated the worst bullying in my life, just because she was jealous of my safety net within the school system. In the end, no psychiatrist or therapist has been able to help me. No medication helps me... all they did was make me want to just disappear. I healed on my own, but those scars are still there. I have very few loved ones I can fall back to when I need to cry. When I need to vent out my frustrations. All this because my trust had been shattered repeatedly, time and time again. I taught myself these lessons: 1. Forgive but don't forget (only 3 times) 2. Cut out the toxicity 3. Don't rely on those that have hurt others 4. Push forward towards the promises made to your true loved ones 5. Don't blindly listen to 'professionals' who won't understand or listen to your side These have guided me to what I am today. I seem cynical at times, but who wouldn't be after watching your mother divorce twice, losing 2 fathers in 1 day, being uprooted multiple times (up to 13 I can recall), bullied relentlessly for health issues, constantly hospitalized, and being abused from early childhood to late adulthood. I use my experiences to console others when they need it. To be the ear they need. But I won't tell them to do things like take X medication.
I don't feel there is a cure, but here in my heart always dream and hope. Always I feels like pawn and pawn to my own life... And sometimes it feels pain and only pain in my chest At least I try my best to don't bother anyone else And I keep making others smile and feel happier Someone who getting through so much, knows a lot, advices a lot Sadly if I would found an answer to my problem, I wouldn't have a problem still Seeking an answer is not enough, a voice inside telling me I'm not enough Seeing smile of my friends, or someone else is however, proves them wrong... Ahh feels like writing small poem but with my genuine feelings
I am autistic. And it was harsh. I was bullied but the other kids were the least of my problems. My problem was the teachers. They refused to do anything, they wanted me to be friends with everyone. I always got so worried if they tried to hurt me or my friends (by hurt I mean stuff like shaming us in public or taking our food away). They had unlimited power (even legally, tenture caused me the problem that I cannot report my teachers). Until this day I want to be a social worker, so that I can stand up for other children
Same here. :( and the fact that, even tho im aware and dont "cause it thru the whole expecting-the-worst-and-causing-it-out-of-fear" thing, i to this day get scapegoatted and traumatized. It recently happened where i worked 😠 i just want others to have to do whats right, but people still get to break laws and companies bury it by firing the one attacked (me).... Thats just the recent example. But i wish it would stop. I plan to keep everyone at arms length, as a boundary, to secure safety in a workplace. Then ill "reconstruct" or try to reintegrate people, if i come to that point in healing :( 🤷♀️
I was a disabled child with autism that I still have, which led to misunderstandings of me in the past. I only had one friend in my childhood, because a lot of my past peers were false friends, but that wasn't as bad as my last conversation with my father that was a fight. What happened when I last spoke to my dad was when I caught him stealing from my mother, and he said something he shouldn't have which he never did before. That was when I was hurt by one of my parents, when I realized my dad never wanted me as a child. I've had my mother to help me with my trauma after we both left my father, but I haven't trusted others and got angry sometimes to protect myself, like when I feel frustrated or not worthy of friends anymore in my present.
"I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become." Let this be a mantra. It certainly gave me a soothing feeling of reassurance right as I experienced another downfall. Thank you so much for these.
Yup, I still feel extremely(!) vulnerable when entering a ballet class. I've come to really enjoy dancing and, for the most, "make it my own" but something inside of me still feels so naked and raw and I'm always on alert when I enter a class. Gets even worse when I lose my sense of direction (its happened to me before onstage - amateur show). I wish it were different because I know I would get more out of it. At the same time, something inside of me is afraid of letting go of that fear, as its also connected to the thought of "don't get ahead of yourself; know your place." My identity would probably be altered if I lost that fear. It also helps me deal with disappointments and, something I have dealt with since I was young: keep me protected from jealous people. "If they can't see me, they can't hurt me." At the same time it somewhat mutilates me in my expression.
Some wounds simply just don't heal. In anything it's gotten worse over time, I've just done what I can to try and cope without going completely insane from the betrayal. Life's done a pretty solid job of rubbing salt in the wound at every opportunity as well.
Mine did and still divorced... They loved each other from a very young age and up until my mom died many yrs later... and i don't have to imagine... I know.. that even in death the love doesn't die... My question to you is... Can you imagine it... 🧐
I have been through this all. I have a lot of trouble trusting people. I'm always ready for the betrayal. It's very exausting. Thank you for this video, i understand myself more.
ive got bullied from my school mates and my parents. there was no safespace for me. my only and best friend was my anchor. but there was no place to rest. i have to fight with bad memories and sometimes dreams even today. this situation of all vs. me marked me. but im too stubborn to give up. my potential exists and belongs to me. but hardcore triggerpoint nr.1, lonelyness and disappointment are still there... its hard to breath sometimes... i cried waterfalls of tears.... luckily i crafted a rubber boat by myself and did well. i can smile and enjoy, i can do things well, i can do better. i still cant bake good muffins, but its just a matter of time.
We cannot heal completely from the scars we've experienced, but we hope we can be better and live the life we deserve, not just hiding in the shadows of our own traumas.
So much untreated trauma, everywhere. I genuinely believe addressing this problem would be the single most effective way to bring about peace in the world
Man, I got into a car crash last year, and even though nobody got hurt and everyone involved was amicable, the accident was found to be my fault and I paid for the insurance and repairs. What messed me up was that the sweet old lady whose car I hit was uninsured, and she sued me for $27000 in hire car fees, and I fought for an entire year as my legal advisors and insurance company eventually helped me out of it. For that entire year, I refused to drive because I couldn’t afford another lawsuit, and I still get mad anxiety when I get back behind the wheel.
I remembered when I was in kindergarten I was harassed and bullied by an old lady teacher and she humiliated and embarrassing me by verbal abuse in front of her students and use that as an examples of what a " bad" student looks like dispute the fact I have a learning disability as a kid and the school I used to go to is very prejudice about all regular eds over special needs and autism it's terrible I was the only one in class with mild autism and a learning disability and yet I remembered crying in tears over a terrifying face a scary scowl on her face yelling and screaming at me I was like 5 yrs old. While my dad got me to switch schools for that reason my mom on the other hand was mocking me. Years later in my 30s and I still remembered it and it's trauma.
I think all my problems started when I was born. I remember being hit pretty hard by my parents ever since I was a baby. It then would progress into getting hit because I wasn’t able to figure out my homework. Add some bullying at school into the mix as well. Then later in my pre teen years I told them I had had enough of being hit (I was 14 and still getting hit). That problem stopped. Then I soon found out that due to my poor relationship with my parents I tended to fall madly in love with girlfriends that would often treat me horribly. I can still remember the months of wanting nothing more than to not be alive when the girl I loved more than anything was having a secret relationship behind my back. I’ve never been able to trust anyone in my life ever. No girlfriends. No parents. No friends. “Sometimes all you have is yourself” - Jenna
Oh my gosh! God totally spoke to me through this video! At the end when you were talking about the 3 stages to healing from trauma, it was such confirmation as to what God has been doing in my life recently! Stage 2 reminded me that God has been showing me how important it is to have other people involved in my healing process. The more open I am open about my testimony and my sins and my trauma what I struggle with, the more healing I have found. Stage 3 really spoke to me about my identity in Christ! The more I am able to believe that God is who He says He is and that I am who He says I am, the more freedom I will find I live in! Because I am perfectly loved by God and not that scared little girl stuck in trauma anymore! 🥹❤️✝️🙌
When I came out as trans to my mum, she completely disregarded it and said 'Just a phase', 'You'll grow out of it' and 'If you continue to be trans you'll regret it!!' therefore destroying my sense of confidence in my identity and causing symptoms of anxiety and depression. Would this count as a type of trauma?
Yes it is. It's being dismissal. While proclaiming being LGBT can be a phase or social pressure especially nowadays, it doesn't mean that you aren't. Since you are trans, I would be careful still. Probably talk it out with a doctor to be sure. The last thing you want is to found out you're not trans and feel regret or be trans and something goes wrong.
I was bullied by my whole year in Yr6 and now that I am in secondary school I got bullied again now a lots of incidents are happening related to this .
Here are the traumas that challenge me in the present; -Motorcycle accident -Boiling asphalt burns -Unopened 16 oz beer smashed on my forehead (started bony tumor in my frontal sinus) -Punk assaulted my family and I with gun -18 foot ladder fall -Shot at, hit once -Explosion -Multiple surgeries -Assaulted with rocks twice by federal fugitive ( I caught him😉) -Hit by drunk driver on wedding night (spent night in hospital) -Multiple broken bones -Chronic severe pain for decades Those are the Most bothersome I recall offhand. We all suffer so it helps me when I help others. cPTSD symptoms & treatment is a full-time effort. Blessed Be All Good People ✌️
I'm 15 years old. I've been homeschooled since 4th grade, after I left my school because of bullying. I remember drawing comics during break and having people steal them and rip them up, and a bunch of other things. For years I've felt like it didn't really affect me, but I've realized that having left for years has destroyed my social skills. I'm only just now making new friends, and I still have trouble with social interactions. Does this even qualify as trauma? I had never considered it that way.
I definitely have ptsd, I never succeeded in life because of it,Molested by a second grade teacer,shot by a bully when I was 12, bullied all through school,no friends, girlfriends,relationships or jobs, now I'm in my 60s looking forward to this life being over
One thing i've learned from my experience No matter who you are, whether you are religious or not, try not to neglect your child, i now know that sometimes it's not intentional, but don't, it can leave a scar no matter what, mine did, i still remember the day i got sick, but no one believed me, no one saw that there was something wrong with me, i could see it, but no one wanted to take me to a doctor unless i fricking fainted in the floor or had some type of obvious symptom to them, i had a very weird experience which i prayed to God (or Jesus i don't remember because i couldn't take it anymore) and i got healed because it suddenly stopped, i suppose it was a spiritual experience but i'm not really sure what was that, but i still couldn't forget how i was suffering, almost fainting, AND MY CAREGIVERS JUST COULDN'T SEE BECAUSE THEY WERE FINE AND DIDN'T FEEL WHAT I FRICKING FELT, i almost dissociated from myself, wanted to erase all that just to go back to normal, but everytime i look at the possible cause of what made me sick and realize that they were kind of neglectful at that part and that they were wrong, intrusive thoughts come into my mind like "if i eat this will i get sick, i don't want to, i don't want to go through that again", i got into avoidance just to be safe, it's torture because you don't feel safe anymore, because you are just a child, and the people who were supposed to take care of you just abandoned you and left you, i guess this is why i hate to depend on other people But this scar remains on me, i know because i didn't feel safe anymore, i get anxious just by thinking about it
@@Psych2go I am in therapy with a licensed professional. She has helped me to be more vocal about my feelings and confronting the past trauma. She has also helped me understand how to establish boundaries and why they are so important. Because of it I have been able to restart my novel which itself can be called a psychological wellness piece/thriller
I got bullied for having visible arm and leg hair, my tiny chest, my natural sensitivity and my hobbies and interests all through school. I’m at the point where I hate people and hate the world and feel like I don’t belong here. People honestly suck and I’m so done with everything.
Truest pain only occur from someone close..no scar, no blood, no cure, still lingers even die, etc..literally destroy your mind, body, and soul..one will never be the same again after being in this catastrophic situation
4 of the 5 just...can't put into words. Spending so much time to heal from the pain (especially back stabs as those were extremely common and unfortunately still are when barely knowing anyone) yet no matter what I do, someone drags me right back into the suffering I worked hard to get out of. Tried calling out and getting help but never could get any. Left in the dark alone being the best way to put it. Scream out but hear only static. Don't even know what it is like to trust anyone even. Surprised how well I've managed it when it feels like the whole life has just been negatives and nothing else. Hell, even when calling out for help from someone how was there (keyword of "was") they just left. How is someone supposed to handle everyday things when having been forced to depend on a parental figure and treated like a child until of age (going to use 21 for that) while having spend nearly the whole time in education being singled out of everything and ignored next to people once friends turn to bullies with no reason as to why they did that. On top of all that: having to deal with a barely functioning heart due to painful relationship breakups (cheated in one, attacked when another one ended and left when needing someone there when being accused for something I never did. Again.) yet somehow still "power through." Too much experience with pain, suffering and silence. Even if calling for help is still recommended, still will be left in the dark and with anxiety to phone anyone, only becomes harder. Next to being misunderstood when I do actually have someone listening, which feels like once a year and only when unable to manage any level of anger with everything that has happened. Can't ever seem to be free or escape from the past. Edit: nearly deleted all of this in fear of it going by the wayside.
I experienced a traffic accident in 7th grade and I still haven't gotten over it. I don't have nightmares or flashbacks, mainly to the fact that my eyes were closed the second the accident happen. But I have an intense of driving now and get nervous when I see a car coming, even if they are going at the correct speed, and sudden stops scare me too. I'm in college now and still do not drive.
I don’t know if this counts as a broken home..but growing up in a household where my parents constantly argued really left scars with me..sometimes during the argument my dad would leave and I used to think he’d never come back, even though he always did. One time I remember it got so bad..before my mom was a citizen here he threatened to call the police on her. She was packing our things and I was so confused and scared. Then my dad came back and they just argued again. Even though the police didn’t show up. It was traumatizing, sometimes the fights would get physical between them and those who interfered. I remember my parents putting their hands on each other multiple times, I was young and naive and i only wanted the fighting to stop so one time I tried to stop them by asking them- begging them to stop fighting. I think at one point I got in their way and my mom threw me onto the couch from like- across the room. All this fighting from my childhood and that still happens on occasion took a toll on my health and I have trust issues, and abandonment issues because of it. I haven’t even begun to further dissect the way I feel exactly about what the trauma I have from them, and I’ve never fully been able to understand what that toll has been taken on me. I do struggle with maintaining healthy relationships and have a control problem, trying to control aspects of my life since I guess I never could control whether or not my parents fought or stopped. Though I desperately wanted to. I don’t know it’s all just beginning to really hit me in my teen years and I’m beginning to try and put up a brave face and tackle it head on, but easier said than done right?
I love these content & have a Video suggestion: having trauma / depression despite coming from a "good" background I personally feel like physically, I have everything (food, shelter, good school etc) but I feel like emotionally something is missing.
I’m trying to deal with the trauma I’ve dealt with. I’m still a bit fearful of relationships…. at least ones with a long term partner. I’ve been left to deal with stuff on my own, so I’m used to internalizing things and having no one to talk to when i need to. As a result, been hard to open up to my current partner. He’s patient though, thankfully. Worst I’ve dealt with recently was the fear i lost him day he had his bad car accident. I honestly had thought he’d ghosted me, but he’d called me after midnight from the hospital. I couldn’t focus at work all too well while he was there. Felt better when I saw him, but soon as I was in the parking lot, the depression came back. I love him so much
Fifth grade was the most scarring time of my life. Not only was I surrounded by kids taking advantage of my fluctuating emotions, I had a once good friend of mine betray me and also bullied me. Although I forgave her after I moved away, the scar still lingers to this very day
I can think of so many traumatic events that lead to me feeling worthless. My brother telling me - “I’m gonna kill you and dance on your grave to celebrate your death” My mum, every time I wanted to express myself, would tell me to “stop being dramatic” or shout at me for being angry or upset because she “needs to feel comfortable in her own home” My dad telling me I’m choosing to feel how I feel and that my actions and attitude are problematic for those around me, making it feel as though it’s my fault I was traumatised by them and I’m the problem. My first ever girlfriend telling me I was “selfish” if I ever wanted to talk about how I felt. Only showing interest when she wanted to attempt talk of a sexual nature, though I just wasn’t ready for it at the time (I was 16). And finally her cheating on me and telling me by saying “I kissed somebody else, it meant something and I don’t regret it” even going on to say she “loved” the person she cheated on me with and just disposed of me like it was nothing. I feel like I’m of no use to anybody and often feel as though I should end my life. Dunno why I’m typing all this just needed to let it out.
I was bullied from pre k till the 6th grade where I literally got a swirlied and the only reason it stopped was because I moved schools and I’m in college now and my family tells me “stop blaming the bullying for why I always say sorry or why I don’t feel like I can do stuff over half the time” and it’s really annoying at the least
The traumas are still in me. I feel too suffocated and this leads to me talking rudely to my loved one and this upsets my friend too..i don't want to be this way and want to open up but my second thoughts like they might judge me, they might backstab me like my other friends did, they might make fun of my insecurities with their friends..etc...it hurts tho..when you want to open up to your comfort person but you can't
Psychological Abuse comes in so many forms, but is all about control, dominance, and superiority. Racism, misogyny, bigotry, religious abuse, and financial abuse are all included but that’s just scratching the surface. I urge anyone reading this to learn about psychological abuse, because just about all of us are victims to it.
im only 14 and i've experienced 3 of these so far (the mean voices, the hatred of people, and through the red light) im cursed cause i had/have autism ( + hyperlexia, SPD, going nonverbal, the whole ASD package), dyscalculia, borderline HLHS, aortic coarctation, cataracts, glaucoma, nystagmus, strabismus, nerve damage in shoulder, deformities in hands and feet, etc. rest of my family is semi-normal (majority of us are neurodivergent tho) but i hit the genetic jackpot. now im also battling anxiety, depressiin, and a life-threatening aortic aneurysm. i was always bullied in school for looking, acting, and talking weird. they called me dumb (and r*tarded) cause i needed lots of speech therapy, math tutoring (for dyscalculia), ABA therapy, and low vision classes. i still need the last 3. im also genderfluid, bisexual, and demisexual. my familys extremely religious tho, they found out i was queer, and we've had lots of fights and yelling since then. i've had 8 surgeries so far, and i'll need open heart surgery this summer to fix my aortic aneurysm. i'll need a heart-lung machine and i'll be in the ICU for 4 days and then the HDU for like 10 days. i feel like nobody understands me and that im a freak who cant ever fit in. I feel like i have to act happy no matter how depressed i am, i need to be happy for my parents so i don't worry them. but this month my anxiety got so bad cause of everything thats happening, i hit rock bottom. my parents got worried, now they're trying to find me a counselor. the only person in the world who understands me is my best friend whos also my crush. when the doctors said i had heart problems again, i felt like crying or screaming when i got home. i had nobody else i could go to, so i vented/ranted to my best friend in DMs. and he listened and he calmed me down and he said he's there for me no matter what. i love him💙 if you made it to the bottom, please go outside and touch grass its good for you, also have a good morning/day/night! :D
A lot of my childhood was traumatic. I went through both verbal and physical abuse from school, teachers, and even a parent. My childhood is so blurry. People share fond memories, but I can only recall what was recorded on a camera of the time via cassettes/vhs. Then my relationships have been toxic, so that was another traumatic years of event stick with someone for this long. Meaning, majority of my childhood including high school, is a huge blur
"Healing is like an onion. As you process through one layer of trauma to release the pain and heal, a new layer will surface. One layer after another layer will bring up new issues to focus on. Pace yourself. Only focus on one layer at a time."
Dana Arcuri
When you said “healing is like an onion” I instantly thought of shrek 💀
On a serious note I think that’s a really powerful quote.
I also thought of Shrek lol
Timestamps
1). The mean voices 0:42
2). A broken home 1:47
3). A stab in the back 2:44
4). The hatred of people 3:40
5). Through the red light 4:36
6). Let yourself heal 5:22
7). Establishing safety 5:54
8). Reconstruction 6:06
9). Integration 6:25
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Thanks once more
You're good, Deadly A55a551n5 man.
Thank you. Hope you have a nice day too🖤
Thank you for adding the timestamps!
@@nicholasleipzig5448 not a problem happy to help
I’ve experienced bullying. People used to spread rumors about me, cybor bully me, physically attack me, and use me. Teachers also treated me differently than other students. I still have low self esteem and I still have trouble knowing for sure if people are actually my friend or if they are just using me.
I'm still bitter over an incident with my mom, it makes me feel so defenseless whenever I remember it. I hate parties because it's loud, crowded, and it makes me super uncomfortable. Before the pandemic, my mom would throw parties for New Year's Eve with alcohol for friends and family so I would try to stay hidden away in my room. One time she thought it'd be a great idea to have everyone rush into my room and yell "Happy New Year! " at the top of their lungs. I was curled up in the corner, crying and hyperventilating because of how overwhelmed I was by the all the people and noise. How did she react, you may ask? Instead of comforting me and trying to understand why I felt that way, her drunk ass kept telling me to stop crying and that I was "overreacting" and "being sensitive", something that hurts a lot to hear because of how many times I've been told that as a small child. I have such a hard time expressing sadness and anger, when I do it feels I'm drowning in it. Like it'll never stop and the tears would flow forever.
Whenever I try to mention it and ask for her to apologize, she tells me that I shouldn't have acted that way because that was my family. I have severe anxiety and it makes no exceptions for anyone, and those people aren't even close to me! This just make me bottle up my emotions more, I'm always misunderstood by others and I can't just explain how I feel because I just fall apart.
I have some trauma of people leaving me due to my mother.
When I was young (around 7), I was threaten by her that she would throw me to the orphan and she did drive all the way to the orphanage to leave me there but ended up not doing it.
Around 9 I think? She told me to pack my bag and said that I'll go to the orphan to stay, I was terrify and resist. Her friend drive me to the orphan since she was mad at me and doesn't want to see me and I ended up staying at the orphan for a day, but that's enough to traumatized me since I was born in a single mother house and my only parent I had was my mother.
After that event, whenever she came late to fetch me from somewhere or come home late without telling me anything, I'll keep thinking all kinds of scenarios from the best to the worst as the time goes by. By late I mean is like half hour late from planned if she's gonna fetch me, if it's coming home late then it's around an hour half.
She did 'apologize' but it's halfheartedly she told me that I shouldn't be looking at the past and stuff. I know it's just some minor things to others but to me it's really effecting me a lot.
@@HarutoNanase it’s not a minor thing. It’s very important and traumatizing event. Even by reading it I felt bad. I’m very sorry for you to have such an experience at your early age. I am really sorry. I hope you are doing well now with this memory in your heart, I wish you all the best
oh my family loves to use the classic "you're just being dramatic!" it really hurts, no matter which context.
Have you considered by any chance, that you may have Asperger’s Syndrome? You sound just like me, being specially sensitive to loud noises, and feeling overwhelmed by crowds of people (and being called sensitive by others too, because it seems no one around us feels the way we do!) It might be worth it to explore the possibility, for me it was a game changer to learn why I struggle with sensory stimuli, good luck!
@@HarutoNanase Dang no that's scary. Nine years old! She probably thought it was a joke or prank or something, actually leaving you at the orphanage for a day. What a cruel thing to do to a child.
Video suggestion: 5 best/worst coping mechanisms (for mental disorders)
Thank you for the suggestion! Do you have any personal opinions on this yourself? What do you think are some good/bad coping mechanisms for mental disorders?
@@Psych2go tbh idk which is why I would want this video, to learn the best ways to cope and possibly share with my friend with ptsd some good coping mechanisms
Understand 😢
@Psych2go one of the bad ones is osd in my opinion because that's one of my coping mechanisms and it's ruining my life slowly(sorry my English is not that good)
Don’t be surprised if it starts to feel odd when you slip back into an unhealthy habit. It is self-respect speaking up, reminding you to take care of what you love: You.
What if I don’t love myself…
@@Californiagirllxo If you didn't, you wouldn't be watching these. Keep taking care of yourself, and one day you'll find it.
Thank you for shining a light on this subject. Too many people think you have to be in seriously bad (think war torn country) situation to have PTSD, and it's simply not true. I see all the comments of those who leave them, and your pain is valid. You are loved. 💜
Thank you for your validating comment. In your experience, what do you think are some of the more subtle sings of PTSD that may not be very apparent?
@@Psych2go it may be different for me, being autistic and technically dealing with cptsd, but I am constantly feeling hypersensitive to the smallest of things off and on. I've had to learn to pause and give my brain time to logically process once I can gain control and learn sometimes I can't help it when I scream when something throws me off guard. It's usually dealing with benign things, like a bug crawling on me will make me jump and scream most times... Even if I'm really not afraid. I know I didn't answer with a short and clear answer, but it took a late diagnosis and a lot of interoception (I think this is the right word...) to get where I am. It hasn't come easy, and sadly I feel like I've gotten more help from channels like yourself than professionals... But I think that is because autism in females still very much in development. I do wish to thank you for your existence. For making this content easy to digest and translating it into different t languages, so we all can hopefully have access to it.
Edit: interoception wasn't quite what I meant there, introspection. But I've also noticed I tend to be more sensitive to fluctuations in temperature and also feeling in the body... So I guess that also is true
Yes u do actually sitting at home on ur ass isn't PTSD
1-I don’t know if it qualifies as bullying but many of my classmates back in my school days were often rude, bratty or plain unbearable to be around. Maybe it was me being too sensitive or overwhelmed by everything else about school but I could not be near practically anyone in my classroom other than my two best friends and some friends that were in other classrooms. One boy in particular often swore, got into fights and even harassed classmates and teachers. I don’t know what is he doing now that we all graduated.
2-Mom and dad divorced when I was a toddler but they don’t fight. In fact, they’re pretty amicable despite no longer being married. Dad remarried and gave me my little sis but mom had other two boyfriend before breaking up with them too and I had to tell her to not date anymore. Since the initial divorce happened when I was too young, I don’t remember much.
3-I’ve never had a date so I don’t know exactly how it feels to be cheated on. Even then, I know it must be awful.
4-Wasn’t discriminated myself but I actively advocate against it because it’s just plain wrong to judge someone over something they were born with. It’s however a part of my religious trauma because the most fundamentalists members of any religion often use their beliefs and dogmas to justify discrimination (Needs no explaination).
5-As someone who was caught in an earthquake back in mid 2018, this is the one that I relate the most. The incident caused me to develop a generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). So now, I try my hardest to avoid reading news or certain online comments because they trigger my inner dread (despite me not minding them in the past). My fears often come to haunt me and pelt my mind with worst case scenarios such as another possibly worse earthquake destroying my building and killing me. PS: The quake in question wasn’t catastrophic but the mere thought of the building crumbling down on me was enough to mentally scar me.
I don't think there's something as too sensitive, everyone is different and unique. Science and psychology mostly are now recognising that every negative experience can leave a wound. Going through an experience that others faced and recovered from quickly doesn't make you slow or acting like the victim: more sensitive people or detail-oriented people take in more data and simply have more emotions and informations to deal with. So even if some people might push you to simply "get over it", to me you're really brave and have come a long way and i tell you from the bottom of my heart: you should be really proud of yourself.
(edit: typo)
I understand everything I am Muslim but my dad and mom are💔now I am very sad 😔 all kids have their own problems even me and lucky people boys are mean but some are not there are lots of people that are bad we maybe don't understand but some people do understand and some parents are mean and crazy 😅 but if I have secrets I keep it in my head 😢
Everyone has a secret but they can tell the ones that tell theirs maybe not all people are bad I think
I always wanted to be nice and I try do the things that your heart dezayers❤ And that good we know 😊
Having trouble is a part of life 😊😊😊
Oh god...i definitely went thru worst bullying which affected all through my schooling which forced me into a shell n later no one even knew i existed except two of my friends
I'm going to college this year and trust me my mom is super worried what if i stay the same but i think I'm getting better or at least I'm trying...uk the constant feel of being neglected from the whole class...
And thanks for coming to my vent session👍🏻
Let me advise this: Go get help and do the homework it takes to get over it. I fought that feeling for 35 years and though I've had a fulfilled life, bullying in junior high school damaged my social life...for most of my life. I allowed those people to have that much power over me for so long. Then I decided that I didn't want to feel like a victim anymore. I spoke with a faith-based therapist, which helped me. I also joined a martial arts club. I met cool people there who accepted me and taught me, made me stronger. They're very accepting of everyone, especially beginners. Work through this as soon as you can so that you aren't letting it anchor you your whole life.
@@Thomas116-m2n I'm actually planning on joining martial arts class too in a few days i think that'll help me with my confidence n being social and I'm so glad it helped you as well! Thanks a lot for ur advice I'm never letting anyone take so much power over me 😭
You missed a very important part: you might never be 'okay' but you will be okay. You find a new equilibrium and even though you might not be happy, you'll feel like you can move on from it. I was deeply traumatized sexually as a child. It still hits me sometimes 30 years later, resulted in PTSD and chronic depression. I will probably never be 'okay' like I imagine other people are. But I can be okay for me, and if I have a bad day... well, tomorrow might be better.
I'm so sorry to hear you've gone through that. I will be praying for you and for your healing.
@@elizabethval835 pray in one hand. Poop in the other. See which fills up faster. I appreciate your sentiment, but superstitious belief is WHY I was molested, so please keep your bronze age mythology to yourself. thank you.
I suffered with bullying for a big part of my life, and when I finally left that school (stayed there until I was ten), I couldn't trust anyone.
I was an easy target because I have angry control problems, and at that time it was even worse, so I got angry and I became the bad guy every single time, teachers and the principal blamed me for everything, so to this day I hide my emotions a lot, have trouble expressing myself for fear of what others will say and have trouble trusting people since even friends I thought were gonna be there for me, started bullying me as well at that time.
More recently, I'm forcing myself to open up and trust people better, and trying to express through the music I like and my life is so much better now, but those scars are still there, and I don't think they're ever going away
I have went through all of these experiences since I was really young, and continue to be reminded of them today and it still feels like the wound is bleeding. Stay safe everyone!
I'm really glad you started to add tips on how to deal with stuff! Admittedly, I think I needed that kick right now as I had been stuck in a cycle of negative self talk these days... in part about #1 and #2 and other stuff...
Thank you so much for sharing your personal experience with us. Why do you think you recently started getting into a cycle of negative self-talk?
@@Psych2go So now also getting into the therapist role instead of just pointing people towards one? :P
Ah, just kidding. I always hated my birthdays and my 30th is coming up, so that combined with a rather jarring valley of loneliness has caused me to ruminate about about all the stuff I missed out on that other people my age must have experienced, all because of my avoidant anxieties. And in particular how all my attempts to get out more, pick up a new hobby and try to use it to connect with others... somehow resulted in absolutely nothing and I'm pretty much still where I started... 11 years ago.
I was bullied for two years at my old school and it still affects me even though I transfered to a new school a year ago and I just hope It doesn't transfer in adulthood for me... I'm getting proper treatment from therapy and I really hope it fully heals me...
Saying a prayer for you Mariana 🌱🌷🙏🩷🕊️
@@gewokrootbeer5399 Thank you so much!! 💖💖
I told my parents I want to go new school because.....
My parents don't care
I'm 25 now still affect me. I try move on
I was bullied for 3 and half year.
@@iamdoctorcat6347 Aww, I hope you get better!
When I went into Kindergarten in 1991, the ADA had only just been codified into law. I am blind I. One eye, and my acuity is 20/500 in the other. I have epilepsy and am autistic and hard of hearing as well, though this didn’t become an issue until high school.
From kindergarten through the end of 6th grade, I was bullied by most everyone at school, including my teachers. I was pushed downstairs, subjected to verbal torture because of my differences, tripped, pushed off playground equipment, had my things stolen from my backpack, had papers I had completed were taken and I was the one punished for this. I was even told by the school principal that it would be easier on the teachers for me to go to the state school for the blind, at 10, and this is 7 hours away from where I lived. There were 2 girls who were kind to me and we are still friends.
At the school for the blind, I was shunned by some of my dorm mates because I would monologue about books, music and gaming.
In high school, I stayed to myself mostly as I really had no commonality with my friends. I love languages and was well known at high school for singing Gaelic tunes and such.
It wasn’t easy and it is very traumatizing. I have been a victim of pedophilia, and my son’s conception was not my choice. I have learnt empathy through these experiences and though I often wish things had been different and that I’d made better choices as a young adult. I have to believe there was a purpose for all of it, and perhaps it is to end the cycle of abuse that haunts my parents and I turn was unintentionally abused my them. I want to end this cycle with Rory and show him that he is a good person who deserves all the love and respect I. The world and nothing less. He too is autistic, and I have done my very best to make certain that he gets the help he deserves that i didn recurve.
I finally had to decide if I would choose mt path or let my mental disorders dictate my actions. I chose the former. It’s a struggle daily, but it’s worth every second. I just wish there were some online therapists that accepted Medicaid in Texas. Anyway, sorry for the wall of text:)
Wish you all the best
1-When I got bullied I didn't care and when they tried to take it physical, I beat both of them up (lol)
2- Parents Happily Married
3- Been left by friends and lovers (more often then not sadly) but never cheated on
4- Black, nationality kinda confusing since like 3 countries don't give me full citizen rights,
5- Things still happening and I'd rather be laughing then crying. Being constantly left by friends sucks but that's what happens when you force yourself to be social. Loneliness as addicting as it is quite frankly, sucks. I just wish I could find people who want to be my friend as much as I do. A lover at this point is just unrealistic without any good friends so yeah.
My traumatic event happened during the time my parents where "taking a break" from each other. While my dad was living on his own, during one of my visits with him he invited his gf over (dad and mom were STILL married) and he told me (I remember this because it confused me so much): "You're going to see me kiss her, but it doesn't mean anything. I still love your mom, but you can't tell her about this." WTF?! I was like 8 or 9! My dad put me in a situation I was NEVER SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT!😠😡🤬
I wished my trauma was only that, but mine were physical abuse of my mother (my dad hurt my mom) and mental abuse for me and my sisters (also my dad) then divorce, I was 3 years old when my parent were divorced but I still remember my dad hitting my mom when I was 3 years old 😣 btw my dad now know that was horrible what he did and want to see us more often and me too 😞 (it was a bit hard to me to write that even if that was 11 years ago)
ty for making this i can tell it'll be helpful!:)
Thank you for your comment! Which points did you find helpful in the video?
I can definitely relate to the divorce bit. I was 12 when it happened but oh boy do I have some massive baggage from it. I remember trying to get some sleep since I had school in the morning and hearing my mom shouting at my dad through the phone and I can hear the argument through the floor in my bedroom which was right above the kitchen. So yeah, trying to sleep with that going on was nearly impossible for me. I think it’s why to this day I can’t stand when a fight happens or people start to yell and scream at each other. It’s a huge trigger for me and I just want to get out of the area that it’s happening in and try to calm down and stop my brain from going haywire.
Here are the 5 traumatic events:
1) The mean voices
2) A broken home
3) A stab in the back
4) The hatred of people
5) Through the red light (a physical trauma)
Human are human unfortunately (i asked the same question)@@Ecktor
I’ve been in 2 bad accidents and tons of car problems. my anxiety shoots up every time I’m behind a wheel thank you for seeing us❤
I have been going through my own trauma recovery over the last 5 or so years. I am finally feeling some movement forward in my Integration stage - I am using my RUclips channel to inspire people to make positive changes in their life.
This video is a great place of information to start on a self-progression journey. Thank you for making this 💝
Fascinating... thanks for your video !
In my experience, society doesn't give a shit if one needs time to heal. If I am not up and ready a day after whatever happened, I am not worth the trouble (quote from my siblings)
I almost shed a tear watching this video. As a victim of post trauma disorder, I know how hard it is to let go of something that's affected your mentality. How things like fear have control over your life. But I try to remain calm, and look towards the positives, I try not to go back to what my enemies have caused, or my past drama like situations I've had on social media. The trauma I experienced was my personal information being exposed onto the internet. An enemy of mine leaked my full name on various social media sites. Because my name isn't common, it's very likely someone can find where I live according to the name that was leaked.
We're so sorry that you had a horrible experience with PTSD and what sounds like an invasion of privacy. How are you doing now? How are you coping with the aftereffects of the PTSD and the traumatic event?
@@Psych2go Well this pain has affected me throughout most of 2022. The person who leaked my info to the internet showed no remorse for his actions and would continue to harass me all through 2022 and into the very beginning of 2023.
He told me back in June 2022, if I blocked him he would continue to spam my full name to as many people I communicate with online. I had no choice but to continue having this individual friended on my friends list. Several months passed and by February 2023, I finally blocked that individual. However, that event still haunts me to this day and I would shed a tear if I ever get reminded of that horrifying event. 😔
I’m 32 and I feel like my whole life has been dedicated to healing. My father was an emotional infant and very explosive which was manageable with my mother who was loving and nurturing, but then she died when I was around 9 and my father couldn’t cope and had no child rearing skills and a huge temper. I remember struggling so bad I would just sit at the kitchen table, not knowing how to communicate the distress I was in desperate for someone to see something was wrong but nobody got me help. I had undiagnosed face blindness, autism and transsexualism and had to discover all this for myself in adulthood. I also have a disorganised attachment style which I’m still working through.
On the upside, I have gained a lot of wisdom and have reached a good place in my life, it’s a lot of work for one person but it is doable.
Uhh sorry to interrupt, but it's not called "transsexual" anymore.
What you have is gender dysphoria
My parents divorced when I was 7, and that was a good thing. It helped me with personal growth, since I could be completely away from my verbally violent father some of the time. The first time I was told about I cried a lot, but that was because it wasn't worded correctly. My dad said it as: "Mom is moving." Like my mom was just moving away and I'd never see her again. I'm happy my parents divorced, that has been a really positive thing in our family.
Can you make a video about stuttering and its mental health impact? I feel like there is a taboo around stuttering and my mental health has definitely been damaged by my stuttering because of the intense anxiety and shame it leaves. Btw, love your videos! They are extremely important in this day and age
3. Started a relationship when I wasn't looking for it, it just happened. 3 to 4 weeks after fights started, growing in intensity with each one ended to a point where I was insulted and felt that I had to measure each word and action, as we kept getting back together. It came to an end about 4 months after it started. 3 weeks later she tried to come back, saying she still loved me very much, but the trauma was there and I just couldn't go there again. One month after this conversation, I learned she started a new relationship with someone I considered a long time friend. Neither of them had any respect or dignity to talk to me. It felt, and still feels like a stab in the back from both of them. From other people in our group of friends, I received zero support or even listened to them saying they were happy for them. It's been hard to process all of this, even with mental health professionals helping.
When I got diagnosed with autism at age 7/8 (so quite young) I got abused, emotional neglected, mentally abused, emotionally abused and even physically abused. They mocked me for it, yelled at me for legit no reason and I was the black sheep, and the scapegoat.
My little sister, 8, spoiled brat, was pampered and was the golden child.
I still have problems with my mom, I think she’s toxic. She always thinks „Yall blame me for everything“ „I’m always alone“ „You (me) never admit your Mistakes and blame them on others, and in reality, she’s the one doing it.
Then last October childwelfare (but first police) people came at 23:00 and took us away for 2 weeks because my parents were both drunk and had a fight, my mom threw my dads Tablet against a wall and my father threw my SCHOOL IPAD against the wall, almost hitting my sister. That’s when she called the police.
My parents are divorced since then, and my dad (a narcissist) didn’t change his opinion of me.
I’ve always lived in a dysfunctional family and broken family, our flat often was dirty and what else am I supposed to do?
I was well liked in high school and had lots of friends, but I was really insecure about it because I was the weird kid in elementary school who was scapegoated for everything, so sometimes it was hard to trust it. I still have trouble keeping friends.
this hits home hard. who else had narcissistic/manipulative parents?
I have rsd so I always take criticisms badly. I have so much trauma because of it. a person can say one word and it not even be directed at me or be mean but I will spiral because of it. its taken a while to deal with it and your videos have definitely helped. thank you :)
I was bullied by black kids alot when I was young. I still can't bring myself to trust or be around them. So I can definitely relate to no. 4
Hi!! Just here to spread good vibes!
1. You are enough. Just because you ARE.
2. You are strong. The fact that you are here, alive, that's enough. You are strong for being, even if you think that you didn't put an effort on it.
3. Our brain likes to trick us: what you think about yourself might not be what you are. Humans are sometimes driven by emotions that our brain tries to comprehend and name and viceversa, we think something and then we feel something based on that thought.
4. If your emotions are too much too handle, remember that they are just emotions: they are not bad and they are not good either! They just are, and it's in our power to decide how to act based on them.
5. Sometimes, we can't control our actions, and we find ourselves driven by the emotions or unable to control ourselves: it's fine. There are things that are out of our control ans it's fine. What's important is that you learn about your mistakes, discover yourself, and of course, forgive yourself to step into the path of healing. If you hurted someone, you can change that behavior. If someone hurted you, that pain doesn't define who you are as a person.
Healing is a long and painful journey. It is. And nobody will tell you otherwise unless ther are lying. But you are strong, strong enough to do this. You are as capable as any other human being to get through this.
And if your life is too much for you to handle: speak to others and find comfort in others. It's scary to trust, I know, but as humans we need to live in company of others, we need the other person (and that's ok!). Talking about what's bothering you with a family member/friend/partner is very important. And of course, if you can afford it or are able to, it's also important to seek help from a specialist. Therapy IS for everyone... But not every therapist is for everyone. Find the person who understands you and want what's best for you.
Lots of hugs and/or pats in the head for everyone! Have a nice day ❤️ Love you all
Thanks for the boost.
Thank you, I needed reminding :)
woah. i didnt know my life was so traumatic thank you
Thank you for your comment. Which part of the video was helpful for you?
My parents divorced when I was 7, and at the time I took it really lightly and well, because first of all I was young and innocent, I wasn't aware of the consequences of a divorce, plus that way I thought that my parents would stop fighting. I think I have internalised all of the negative thoughts of my parents divorce until now.
Today I'm 16 and my parents still struggle to communicate, they are not getting along at all, they fight whenever they see each other and just keep criticizing each other, talk about the other negatively with me. Now I'm just getting really tired of their conflicts, plus sometimes I have to be the messenger between them, and I'm always in the crossfire, as I can't choose a side. Now I just have to stop listening to their critics and find a solution to this...
I have realized all of this not so long ago, thanks to these videos and to a therapist. Thank you for this ^^
My beloved lady at age 32 passed away the following day after a wild night out. Our last moments together were being mean to one another and fighting. I've never felt this pain of grief before or since.
I have experienced all of these... except the stab in the back was one of my closest friends who instigated the worst bullying in my life, just because she was jealous of my safety net within the school system.
In the end, no psychiatrist or therapist has been able to help me. No medication helps me... all they did was make me want to just disappear. I healed on my own, but those scars are still there.
I have very few loved ones I can fall back to when I need to cry. When I need to vent out my frustrations. All this because my trust had been shattered repeatedly, time and time again.
I taught myself these lessons:
1. Forgive but don't forget (only 3 times)
2. Cut out the toxicity
3. Don't rely on those that have hurt others
4. Push forward towards the promises made to your true loved ones
5. Don't blindly listen to 'professionals' who won't understand or listen to your side
These have guided me to what I am today. I seem cynical at times, but who wouldn't be after watching your mother divorce twice, losing 2 fathers in 1 day, being uprooted multiple times (up to 13 I can recall), bullied relentlessly for health issues, constantly hospitalized, and being abused from early childhood to late adulthood.
I use my experiences to console others when they need it. To be the ear they need. But I won't tell them to do things like take X medication.
I don't feel there is a cure, but here in my heart always dream and hope.
Always I feels like pawn and pawn to my own life...
And sometimes it feels pain and only pain in my chest
At least I try my best to don't bother anyone else
And I keep making others smile and feel happier
Someone who getting through so much, knows a lot, advices a lot
Sadly if I would found an answer to my problem, I wouldn't have a problem still
Seeking an answer is not enough, a voice inside telling me I'm not enough
Seeing smile of my friends, or someone else is however, proves them wrong...
Ahh feels like writing small poem but with my genuine feelings
I am autistic. And it was harsh. I was bullied but the other kids were the least of my problems. My problem was the teachers. They refused to do anything, they wanted me to be friends with everyone. I always got so worried if they tried to hurt me or my friends (by hurt I mean stuff like shaming us in public or taking our food away). They had unlimited power (even legally, tenture caused me the problem that I cannot report my teachers). Until this day I want to be a social worker, so that I can stand up for other children
Wow, what the heck is the country you're living it?
Same, at least i was not the only one who had a trash teacher and dumb*** kids who bullies because of being different
Aren't i too early ?
nope
lol no
noopee
Idk
Aren't *we* early?
My childhood trauma is very unique and I've never met anyone who has been through the same who can relate :(
Same here. :( and the fact that, even tho im aware and dont "cause it thru the whole expecting-the-worst-and-causing-it-out-of-fear" thing, i to this day get scapegoatted and traumatized. It recently happened where i worked 😠 i just want others to have to do whats right, but people still get to break laws and companies bury it by firing the one attacked (me)....
Thats just the recent example. But i wish it would stop. I plan to keep everyone at arms length, as a boundary, to secure safety in a workplace. Then ill "reconstruct" or try to reintegrate people, if i come to that point in healing :( 🤷♀️
I was a disabled child with autism that I still have, which led to misunderstandings of me in the past. I only had one friend in my childhood, because a lot of my past peers were false friends, but that wasn't as bad as my last conversation with my father that was a fight. What happened when I last spoke to my dad was when I caught him stealing from my mother, and he said something he shouldn't have which he never did before. That was when I was hurt by one of my parents, when I realized my dad never wanted me as a child. I've had my mother to help me with my trauma after we both left my father, but I haven't trusted others and got angry sometimes to protect myself, like when I feel frustrated or not worthy of friends anymore in my present.
"I am not what happened to me. I am what I choose to become." Let this be a mantra.
It certainly gave me a soothing feeling of reassurance right as I experienced another downfall. Thank you so much for these.
Yup, I still feel extremely(!) vulnerable when entering a ballet class.
I've come to really enjoy dancing and, for the most, "make it my own" but something inside of me still feels so naked and raw and I'm always on alert when I enter a class. Gets even worse when I lose my sense of direction (its happened to me before onstage - amateur show). I wish it were different because I know I would get more out of it. At the same time, something inside of me is afraid of letting go of that fear, as its also connected to the thought of "don't get ahead of yourself; know your place." My identity would probably be altered if I lost that fear. It also helps me deal with disappointments and, something I have dealt with since I was young: keep me protected from jealous people. "If they can't see me, they can't hurt me." At the same time it somewhat mutilates me in my expression.
Yep. #1 left me with severe social anxiety that I only discovered the root of last year.
Some wounds simply just don't heal. In anything it's gotten worse over time, I've just done what I can to try and cope without going completely insane from the betrayal.
Life's done a pretty solid job of rubbing salt in the wound at every opportunity as well.
Thanks for this.
Imagine having parents who love each other.
couldn’t have been my “family”
Mine did and still divorced... They loved each other from a very young age and up until my mom died many yrs later... and i don't have to imagine... I know.. that even in death the love doesn't die... My question to you is... Can you imagine it... 🧐
@@chapo0815 no i can’t, i don’t believe that love is real unfortunately
ya'll probably hear this a lot but your voice is really comfortingly soft
I have been through this all. I have a lot of trouble trusting people. I'm always ready for the betrayal. It's very exausting. Thank you for this video, i understand myself more.
ive got bullied from my school mates and my parents. there was no safespace for me. my only and best friend was my anchor. but there was no place to rest. i have to fight with bad memories and sometimes dreams even today. this situation of all vs. me marked me. but im too stubborn to give up. my potential exists and belongs to me. but hardcore triggerpoint nr.1, lonelyness and disappointment are still there... its hard to breath sometimes... i cried waterfalls of tears.... luckily i crafted a rubber boat by myself and did well. i can smile and enjoy, i can do things well, i can do better. i still cant bake good muffins, but its just a matter of time.
I've experienced all the numbers except no. 2.
Woah, didn't paid any attention to all those traumatic events until it affects my self destructively.
We cannot heal completely from the scars we've experienced, but we hope we can be better and live the life we deserve, not just hiding in the shadows of our own traumas.
Never felt so understood in one video thank you
it feels illegal to be *this* early 💀
WOAH WE ARE LONG LOST TWINS :0
AMOGNUS
I'm here as well
UGH IKR
very much agree
Me rn : it feeld illegal to be late
I’m glad I came back … thank YAH for this channel❤ take care of yal self out there. This human experience is a mofo yo ✊🏾💯
So much untreated trauma, everywhere. I genuinely believe addressing this problem would be the single most effective way to bring about peace in the world
Man, I got into a car crash last year, and even though nobody got hurt and everyone involved was amicable, the accident was found to be my fault and I paid for the insurance and repairs.
What messed me up was that the sweet old lady whose car I hit was uninsured, and she sued me for $27000 in hire car fees, and I fought for an entire year as my legal advisors and insurance company eventually helped me out of it.
For that entire year, I refused to drive because I couldn’t afford another lawsuit, and I still get mad anxiety when I get back behind the wheel.
I remembered when I was in kindergarten I was harassed and bullied by an old lady teacher and she humiliated and embarrassing me by verbal abuse in front of her students and use that as an examples of what a " bad" student looks like dispute the fact I have a learning disability as a kid and the school I used to go to is very prejudice about all regular eds over special needs and autism it's terrible I was the only one in class with mild autism and a learning disability and yet I remembered crying in tears over a terrifying face a scary scowl on her face yelling and screaming at me I was like 5 yrs old.
While my dad got me to switch schools for that reason my mom on the other hand was mocking me.
Years later in my 30s and I still remembered it and it's trauma.
Thanks so much for this! Social development is impeded in ways that I can see in me from bullying and demanding.
I think all my problems started when I was born. I remember being hit pretty hard by my parents ever since I was a baby. It then would progress into getting hit because I wasn’t able to figure out my homework. Add some bullying at school into the mix as well. Then later in my pre teen years I told them I had had enough of being hit (I was 14 and still getting hit). That problem stopped. Then I soon found out that due to my poor relationship with my parents I tended to fall madly in love with girlfriends that would often treat me horribly. I can still remember the months of wanting nothing more than to not be alive when the girl I loved more than anything was having a secret relationship behind my back. I’ve never been able to trust anyone in my life ever. No girlfriends. No parents. No friends. “Sometimes all you have is yourself” - Jenna
Well, this is certainly reassuring.
Oh my gosh! God totally spoke to me through this video! At the end when you were talking about the 3 stages to healing from trauma, it was such confirmation as to what God has been doing in my life recently! Stage 2 reminded me that God has been showing me how important it is to have other people involved in my healing process. The more open I am open about my testimony and my sins and my trauma what I struggle with, the more healing I have found. Stage 3 really spoke to me about my identity in Christ! The more I am able to believe that God is who He says He is and that I am who He says I am, the more freedom I will find I live in! Because I am perfectly loved by God and not that scared little girl stuck in trauma anymore! 🥹❤️✝️🙌
When I came out as trans to my mum, she completely disregarded it and said 'Just a phase', 'You'll grow out of it' and 'If you continue to be trans you'll regret it!!' therefore destroying my sense of confidence in my identity and causing symptoms of anxiety and depression.
Would this count as a type of trauma?
Yes it is. It's being dismissal.
While proclaiming being LGBT can be a phase or social pressure especially nowadays, it doesn't mean that you aren't.
Since you are trans, I would be careful still. Probably talk it out with a doctor to be sure. The last thing you want is to found out you're not trans and feel regret or be trans and something goes wrong.
@@Saltedroastedcaramel Thanks for taking your time to respond! I completely agree, and will be taking all of your words into consideration :]
@@cha0s.switch You're welcome.
Ouch... This brought back painful memories and a lot of painful feelings...
I was bullied by my whole year in Yr6 and now that I am in secondary school I got bullied again now a lots of incidents are happening related to this .
Here are the traumas that challenge me in the present;
-Motorcycle accident
-Boiling asphalt burns
-Unopened 16 oz beer smashed on my forehead (started bony tumor in my frontal sinus)
-Punk assaulted my family and I with gun
-18 foot ladder fall
-Shot at, hit once
-Explosion
-Multiple surgeries
-Assaulted with rocks twice by federal fugitive ( I caught him😉)
-Hit by drunk driver on wedding night (spent night in hospital)
-Multiple broken bones
-Chronic severe pain for decades
Those are the Most bothersome I recall offhand. We all suffer so it helps me when I help others. cPTSD symptoms & treatment is a full-time effort.
Blessed Be All Good People ✌️
I'm 15 years old. I've been homeschooled since 4th grade, after I left my school because of bullying. I remember drawing comics during break and having people steal them and rip them up, and a bunch of other things. For years I've felt like it didn't really affect me, but I've realized that having left for years has destroyed my social skills. I'm only just now making new friends, and I still have trouble with social interactions.
Does this even qualify as trauma? I had never considered it that way.
I definitely have ptsd, I never succeeded in life because of it,Molested by a second grade teacer,shot by a bully when I was 12, bullied all through school,no friends, girlfriends,relationships or jobs, now I'm in my 60s looking forward to this life being over
One thing i've learned from my experience
No matter who you are, whether you are religious or not, try not to neglect your child, i now know that sometimes it's not intentional, but don't, it can leave a scar no matter what, mine did, i still remember the day i got sick, but no one believed me, no one saw that there was something wrong with me, i could see it, but no one wanted to take me to a doctor unless i fricking fainted in the floor or had some type of obvious symptom to them, i had a very weird experience which i prayed to God (or Jesus i don't remember because i couldn't take it anymore) and i got healed because it suddenly stopped, i suppose it was a spiritual experience but i'm not really sure what was that, but i still couldn't forget how i was suffering, almost fainting, AND MY CAREGIVERS JUST COULDN'T SEE BECAUSE THEY WERE FINE AND DIDN'T FEEL WHAT I FRICKING FELT, i almost dissociated from myself, wanted to erase all that just to go back to normal, but everytime i look at the possible cause of what made me sick and realize that they were kind of neglectful at that part and that they were wrong, intrusive thoughts come into my mind like "if i eat this will i get sick, i don't want to, i don't want to go through that again", i got into avoidance just to be safe, it's torture because you don't feel safe anymore, because you are just a child, and the people who were supposed to take care of you just abandoned you and left you, i guess this is why i hate to depend on other people
But this scar remains on me, i know because i didn't feel safe anymore, i get anxious just by thinking about it
Literally experienced every single one of these trauma's. The fact that I am functional at all is a miracle
You are probably very emotionally resilient. How are you doing now? Are you getting the help and the resources you need to help with your trauma?
@@Psych2go I am in therapy with a licensed professional. She has helped me to be more vocal about my feelings and confronting the past trauma. She has also helped me understand how to establish boundaries and why they are so important. Because of it I have been able to restart my novel which itself can be called a psychological wellness piece/thriller
My dad was my bully since my childhood. He always used to comment about my body and it is gonna affect me my whole life.
The sting of bullying? I feel it almost always from my providers when they gaslight me. DISRESPECT IN AN UNEVEN POWER DYNAMIC IS BULLYING.
The narrator should have their own ASMR channel. Such a soothing voice!😊
I got bullied for having visible arm and leg hair, my tiny chest, my natural sensitivity and my hobbies and interests all through school. I’m at the point where I hate people and hate the world and feel like I don’t belong here. People honestly suck and I’m so done with everything.
Truest pain only occur from someone close..no scar, no blood, no cure, still lingers even die, etc..literally destroy your mind, body, and soul..one will never be the same again after being in this catastrophic situation
4 of the 5 just...can't put into words. Spending so much time to heal from the pain (especially back stabs as those were extremely common and unfortunately still are when barely knowing anyone) yet no matter what I do, someone drags me right back into the suffering I worked hard to get out of. Tried calling out and getting help but never could get any. Left in the dark alone being the best way to put it. Scream out but hear only static. Don't even know what it is like to trust anyone even. Surprised how well I've managed it when it feels like the whole life has just been negatives and nothing else. Hell, even when calling out for help from someone how was there (keyword of "was") they just left. How is someone supposed to handle everyday things when having been forced to depend on a parental figure and treated like a child until of age (going to use 21 for that) while having spend nearly the whole time in education being singled out of everything and ignored next to people once friends turn to bullies with no reason as to why they did that. On top of all that: having to deal with a barely functioning heart due to painful relationship breakups (cheated in one, attacked when another one ended and left when needing someone there when being accused for something I never did. Again.) yet somehow still "power through." Too much experience with pain, suffering and silence. Even if calling for help is still recommended, still will be left in the dark and with anxiety to phone anyone, only becomes harder. Next to being misunderstood when I do actually have someone listening, which feels like once a year and only when unable to manage any level of anger with everything that has happened. Can't ever seem to be free or escape from the past.
Edit: nearly deleted all of this in fear of it going by the wayside.
I experienced a traffic accident in 7th grade and I still haven't gotten over it. I don't have nightmares or flashbacks, mainly to the fact that my eyes were closed the second the accident happen. But I have an intense of driving now and get nervous when I see a car coming, even if they are going at the correct speed, and sudden stops scare me too. I'm in college now and still do not drive.
yes I do belive bullying has changed me even witnessing other get bullied / beated up triggers me like ptsd ish way
I don’t know if this counts as a broken home..but growing up in a household where my parents constantly argued really left scars with me..sometimes during the argument my dad would leave and I used to think he’d never come back, even though he always did. One time I remember it got so bad..before my mom was a citizen here he threatened to call the police on her. She was packing our things and I was so confused and scared. Then my dad came back and they just argued again. Even though the police didn’t show up. It was traumatizing, sometimes the fights would get physical between them and those who interfered. I remember my parents putting their hands on each other multiple times, I was young and naive and i only wanted the fighting to stop so one time I tried to stop them by asking them- begging them to stop fighting. I think at one point I got in their way and my mom threw me onto the couch from like- across the room. All this fighting from my childhood and that still happens on occasion took a toll on my health and I have trust issues, and abandonment issues because of it. I haven’t even begun to further dissect the way I feel exactly about what the trauma I have from them, and I’ve never fully been able to understand what that toll has been taken on me. I do struggle with maintaining healthy relationships and have a control problem, trying to control aspects of my life since I guess I never could control whether or not my parents fought or stopped. Though I desperately wanted to. I don’t know it’s all just beginning to really hit me in my teen years and I’m beginning to try and put up a brave face and tackle it head on, but easier said than done right?
Video suggestion: drawing away from family and or friends and how to fix it.
This made me cry.
This video hit hard. Dealing with this is very exhausting.
I love these content & have a Video suggestion: having trauma / depression despite coming from a "good" background
I personally feel like physically, I have everything (food, shelter, good school etc) but I feel like emotionally something is missing.
I’m trying to deal with the trauma I’ve dealt with. I’m still a bit fearful of relationships…. at least ones with a long term partner. I’ve been left to deal with stuff on my own, so I’m used to internalizing things and having no one to talk to when i need to. As a result, been hard to open up to my current partner. He’s patient though, thankfully. Worst I’ve dealt with recently was the fear i lost him day he had his bad car accident. I honestly had thought he’d ghosted me, but he’d called me after midnight from the hospital. I couldn’t focus at work all too well while he was there. Felt better when I saw him, but soon as I was in the parking lot, the depression came back. I love him so much
Fifth grade was the most scarring time of my life. Not only was I surrounded by kids taking advantage of my fluctuating emotions, I had a once good friend of mine betray me and also bullied me. Although I forgave her after I moved away, the scar still lingers to this very day
After this, I started writing all of my traumas in sequence.
I can think of so many traumatic events that lead to me feeling worthless. My brother telling me - “I’m gonna kill you and dance on your grave to celebrate your death”
My mum, every time I wanted to express myself, would tell me to “stop being dramatic” or shout at me for being angry or upset because she “needs to feel comfortable in her own home”
My dad telling me I’m choosing to feel how I feel and that my actions and attitude are problematic for those around me, making it feel as though it’s my fault I was traumatised by them and I’m the problem.
My first ever girlfriend telling me I was “selfish” if I ever wanted to talk about how I felt. Only showing interest when she wanted to attempt talk of a sexual nature, though I just wasn’t ready for it at the time (I was 16). And finally her cheating on me and telling me by saying “I kissed somebody else, it meant something and I don’t regret it” even going on to say she “loved” the person she cheated on me with and just disposed of me like it was nothing.
I feel like I’m of no use to anybody and often feel as though I should end my life. Dunno why I’m typing all this just needed to let it out.
Love the relationship between life n chess
I was bullied from pre k till the 6th grade where I literally got a swirlied and the only reason it stopped was because I moved schools and I’m in college now and my family tells me “stop blaming the bullying for why I always say sorry or why I don’t feel like I can do stuff over half the time” and it’s really annoying at the least
The traumas are still in me. I feel too suffocated and this leads to me talking rudely to my loved one and this upsets my friend too..i don't want to be this way and want to open up but my second thoughts like they might judge me, they might backstab me like my other friends did, they might make fun of my insecurities with their friends..etc...it hurts tho..when you want to open up to your comfort person but you can't
School was so traumatic for me that i cant even go near the building
School and bullies are the reason why I have anxiety
Early! Tysm for making this as wellׂׂૢ
Thank you for this ❤
Psychological Abuse comes in so many forms, but is all about control, dominance, and superiority. Racism, misogyny, bigotry, religious abuse, and financial abuse are all included but that’s just scratching the surface. I urge anyone reading this to learn about psychological abuse, because just about all of us are victims to it.
The cheated on one made me cry right now and I do feel like I can never trust again
im only 14 and i've experienced 3 of these so far (the mean voices, the hatred of people, and through the red light)
im cursed cause i had/have autism ( + hyperlexia, SPD, going nonverbal, the whole ASD package), dyscalculia, borderline HLHS, aortic coarctation, cataracts, glaucoma, nystagmus, strabismus, nerve damage in shoulder, deformities in hands and feet, etc. rest of my family is semi-normal (majority of us are neurodivergent tho) but i hit the genetic jackpot. now im also battling anxiety, depressiin, and a life-threatening aortic aneurysm.
i was always bullied in school for looking, acting, and talking weird. they called me dumb (and r*tarded) cause i needed lots of speech therapy, math tutoring (for dyscalculia), ABA therapy, and low vision classes. i still need the last 3.
im also genderfluid, bisexual, and demisexual. my familys extremely religious tho, they found out i was queer, and we've had lots of fights and yelling since then.
i've had 8 surgeries so far, and i'll need open heart surgery this summer to fix my aortic aneurysm. i'll need a heart-lung machine and i'll be in the ICU for 4 days and then the HDU for like 10 days.
i feel like nobody understands me and that im a freak who cant ever fit in. I feel like i have to act happy no matter how depressed i am, i need to be happy for my parents so i don't worry them. but this month my anxiety got so bad cause of everything thats happening, i hit rock bottom. my parents got worried, now they're trying to find me a counselor.
the only person in the world who understands me is my best friend whos also my crush. when the doctors said i had heart problems again, i felt like crying or screaming when i got home. i had nobody else i could go to, so i vented/ranted to my best friend in DMs. and he listened and he calmed me down and he said he's there for me no matter what. i love him💙
if you made it to the bottom, please go outside and touch grass its good for you, also have a good morning/day/night! :D
A lot of my childhood was traumatic. I went through both verbal and physical abuse from school, teachers, and even a parent. My childhood is so blurry. People share fond memories, but I can only recall what was recorded on a camera of the time via cassettes/vhs. Then my relationships have been toxic, so that was another traumatic years of event stick with someone for this long. Meaning, majority of my childhood including high school, is a huge blur
Same, I wished my childhood (0-10 years old) was not that bad, but the damage is arleady done 😞 (mentally and a very little physical)