how I shop for non-essentials
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- Опубликовано: 25 авг 2024
- how I shop for non-essentials
hey y'all, in today's video I'm talking about show I shop for and think about non-essential purchases.
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I'm still retraining my brain. I grew up in poverty. My over purchasing is rooted in that. Lately, I've been telling myself that just because I won't buy all the stuff does not mean I'm back in poverty, with no indoor plumbing and no shoes to wear. I can afford most things, but I don't wish to accumulate more stuff I don't use. It's a battle against my inner child who wanted pretty things and lots of it. I'm now 63 years old and just now starting to win that battle! I've been purging my house & and seeing the vast waste of products and clothing, shoes, jewelry, makeup, and office supplies. It makes me sick to see all the money I wasted. I'm ashamed of my shopping addiction.
thank you so much for sharing your experience here and I'm so sorry to hear that you've struggled with shopping addiction. It's never too late to learn and it sounds like that's exactly what you're doing
I’m in this exact situation. It’s so sad to see the money wasted and wish it would have been spent elsewhere
I feel you guys. I struggle with this sometimes and looking back and mentally tallying up how much money I've spent is sobering.
My money is all that stands between me and homelessness so I ask “is this more important than a roof over my head?” or “if I lost my job, would I regret buying this?” I am the person that my family turns to when they are in need and it made me realize that I have no fall back options.
“goddamnit I am a woman in my 20s and I’m allowed to put stickers on shit!” Hahaha i love that!!❤❤
absolutely worth it and would recommend to a friend (if there was budget) 😂
I'm in my 40s and I put stickers on my shit! LOL I grew up loving stickers so it isn't really a "new" personality trait. LOL
one tip for "track record" is doing the "step method" meaning if you're gonna buy something new starting at the inexpensive end. if you never wear perfume or body spray etc, show yourself you can use one consistently before buying one thats pricy and letting it go bad
This is definitely a mindset I’ve tried to incorporate with fragrance purchases! And now that I have those “stepping stone” bottles, the way I’ve kept myself from buying more/pricier ones is to finish the first bottles. For example, I’ve been wanting an everyday skin scent and think I’ve identified “the one” by sampling, but I bought a dupe bottle from Target late last year. I’m allowing myself to buy “the one,” but only after I’ve finished the Target fragrance (and even more ideally, only when it’s on sale).
I only have 3 and I use them up i don’t get how people hoard body sprays lotions, perfumes . It’s always good to find a signature smell
This is exactly what I do with purchasing toiletries and sometimes even food. If I'm not consistently using a spice, why should I buy a specific brand?
but what happens when the cheaper ones smell like yuck and you don't want to smell like that every day... like it literally makes you sick to smell like it. but I didn have a cheap body spray that I LOVED that I used all the way up and then they discontinued it like less than a year after discovering it. now I'm on a hunt to find something similar and since I'm not familiar with perfumes/scents it's very hard. I buy small or sample dupes or originals of perfumes and cannot find one I am happy with :(
@@spaceedementia lol buy one you like
Bbw has 5.95 days and sas lol
Its infinitely ironic that I got an ad on this video which basically said "SOAP AND WATER ISN'T ENOUGH TO CLEAN YOUR BODY! BUY OUR PRODUCT!"
😂😂😂 I got “your shampoo isn’t tailored to your hair needs” no the humidity is the real problem bestie
I like how we've pivoted from "deodorant is bad" to "you need to put deodorant everywhere including your crotch."
The best thing u can do is put in the cart and think about it it after a couple of days most of the time u don’t feel the need to buy it anymore
Also adding to cart and hitting the page where you put in at least your email then exiting out, most places will send you a discount code after a couple days. So if you do decide to buy after a few days, you might also get a discount (:
Thank you for this video. I spent a lot of time with some cousins who have young children. They have way, way, way more clothes and than any kids need. Realistically the kids have their favorite things and would be content to wear them once a week (whenever clean). at first I found this to be wasteful. But then I really considered their situation. Their mom is chronically ill. For them spending money (or receiving hand-me-downs) on these excess clothes provide her the ability to rest when she needs to. The kids will always have clean sets of clothes and she does not need to worry about folding a load of laundry each day. My natural inclination was to judge the way that they were choosing to approach some of their consumable items. But I understand they are buying convenience when they buy more things. And when you’re chronically ill or have various other stages of life that take up the majority of your time, using material items to add time back is worthwhile and ethical.
As someone who is myself disabled and chronically ill, thank you for taking the time to approach that situation with kindness and compassion 🩷
My area of problem is groceries, there's where I crave variety and novelty, but like you, I'm trying to get novelty through replacements, also I'm working on buy less of everything, there's no reason to hoard when supermarkets are accessible.
Deff a video I need because I'm trying to reform my shopping habits and retrain myself to not overcosume and over spend!
Also I'd love if you'd made a video on BNPL / the pay in 4 installments!!
already have one! I made one in April, I hope you enjoy!
@@shawnaripari omw to watch 😌😌😌
My favorite savings hack is putting something in the cart and leaving it for 24 hours, then forgetting about it completely. ADHD is a bitch when it comes to budget sometimes, but there are some good things :)
I try and follow a rule that I learned in high school. Wait 7 days and if I still want it, go and buy it. I have exceptions to the rule like when Taylor Swift releases a new album or re-recording, I will buy it day of. I know that I'll get a lot of use of them. For books, I check to see if I can find them at the library first and I exclusively use Thriftbooks to buy them.
omg until you said that about the decorating things, I never realised I 1000% got that from my father too. Everything had to be pristine and in new condition as long as possible. The ownership and customization of an item like a laptop or a book without a paperbag cover... not allowed. We NEVER donated our stuff, never got rid of things, but they still had to remain as "original" as possible in case they became a collectors item years down the line.
That's definitely how my dad is too, but I am the polar opposite. 😅
I’m the same way. Leaving the Plastic covers on things like electronics makes me feel like it still new. Also Keeping boxes and packaging prolongs the novelty for me.
I am so glad that I found your channel. I am a total "just treat yourself" person, and I find your videos very rational and it helps me think about what I actually want to be spending my hard earned money on. Thank you for this video!
I'm glad to hear you found it helpful!
Love the concept of “Staple” items that you know works and why change! Makeup is an area where I get sucked in, and going to try your method of lower price before buying. Researching makes me aware they often have same ingredients 😮 Thanks for information on purchasing non necessary items ❤ It is ok for us to buy stickers 😅
Great video as always. When you talked about the stickers and the shame you felt when reading fantasy romance it made me think of buying things for our inner child/past self. I think that it’s the main reason behind most of my recent purchases because I’m currently figuring out who I am and what I like. So I’ve bought 2 pink tshirts because I’m now confident in the fact that I like this color and regret not having more feminine tops. And yesterday I bought a lot of romance games because, once again, I’ve come to terms with the fact that that’s what I like. Now I have to deal with all the purchases that I made that weren’t aligned with who I really was or what I really wanted and this new voracious urge to buy things that I’ve been avoiding but in the end truly wanted. I don’t know if I worded it correctly but I think that it would be a nice topic to discuss, if you haven’t tackle it!
A lot of feminine hobbies or interest are deemed as frivolious or inferior (for instance when it comes to books and romance as a genre) and I think that I’m not the only one finally coming to terms with their « feminine » side and wanting to indulge in order to reconnect with themselves. It’s like buying those things that we yearned for but ignored is a way to retrieve all this time lost being another version of ourselves, in a sense. I don’t know if it’s inherently a bad thing since I feel way more mindful and feel more content with my purchases
bath and bodyworks has 75% off/3.95 sales twice a year, so that's how i'll get novelty
The best tip I’ve ever gotten for buying clothes is to buy colours that suit you!! Yes the seasonal palette. As an artist I can verify colour theory is legit. Now my wardrobe is harmonious and I’m never feeling stuck with it or like my clothes dont suit me.
I wanna get a fancy dress for no other reason than I want one, and I'm happy you posted this because it'll be 300-900 and I don't wanna waste it.
Thrift stores are great for these!
@@hemoglojen
I'll check that out!!
You articulate things so well. I love novelty in food. It's great in America because of the many different cultures you can visit in restaurants- they're almost like mini vacations... yeah, I stay home a lot.
I love that sweater- it looks so comfortable. That heather white t-shirt is totally something I'd wear too. I like to thrift shop, and one thing that really helps me is holding my hand/arm up to the rack and seeing what color/shade looks good with my skin tone. This works best in a store that is organized by color.
I hold my arm up to the clothing too! I always thought I was weird for doing it, but I'm glad to know others do as well. 😅
Honestly, since I started watching your videos, I've thought HARD about things I don't need. Like, I'm noticing that when I see something interesting online, my immediate reaction is to look it up as if I'm buying it. Sooo, thank you bc you're saving me money 🤣
yay! so happy to hear it
Some of the best parenting advice I was ever given was try the easy/cheap thing first. Do you need the super sensitive all organic diapers? Maybe but try the Costco brand first because if those work great! Do you need to heat up a bottle of milk for a 1 yo? Maybe, but why not give it to them cold first and see if they drink it. If they do, awesome you just saved a step.
Feels similar to your idea of trying drug store products first. Especially if you can get some sort of trial version the cheapest option is a great place to start because it just might work for you
I'm in such a rock and a hard place when it comes to this. I moved out into my own 1 bedroom apartment last November and have all starter stuff. My twin bed from my room back at home, plates and utensils that my family gave me secondhand. A couch that my aunt gave me secondhand, etc. While I'm grateful for having everything fully furnished as soon as I moved in, the place doesn't feel like me because the things aren't my style or aesthetic. I have this whole upgrade plan to buy a new bed (queen sized), new plates, utensils, new couch in the future, etc. But ever since I found your channel I've been rethinking that. I feel bad getting rid of perfectly functional furniture and kitchen supplies. I've survived with what I have, I just don't like how my apartment looks. The bed could be justified because I do want a bigger bed. I don't know if I should work with what I have and continue to dislike how my place looks or upgrade to make it feel more like my space.
congrats on moving out 🎉🎉 This was also me when I moved out. I moved out somewhat unexpectedly and couldn't afford to buy high quality stuff and I also moved out during the pandemic when thrift stores were closed and couldn't buy anything 2nd hand either. I was able to buy some stuff off marketplace before and after though. So, almost all of my furniture and electronics are second hand. When my partner and I moved in together we painted a bunch of stuff to make it ours so this is potentially an option! There's also the possibility of doing your place in installments and the installments might be the play so you can save up for stuff with a budget. You could consider what might have the biggest impact on your quality of life or aesthetic? For me personally, I don't care that much about plates and utensils and have thrifted stuff or just bought the cheapest options because they're hidden behind a cupboard most of the time or are used for short periods. Whereas my couch makes a bigger impact in my space. This doesn't have to be an all or nothing situation. You could save up for a couch and some wall art as an example but leave kitchen stuff alone. It could also be worth investigating the importance your stuff plays into how you think about your identity. Just some thoughts you can take or leave!
I'm so glad you created/shared this video. The track record method is something I hadn't heard about before and I think this will help save me from those "aspirational lifestyle" purchases. Thank you!
i felt the sticker thing so much! I have my water bottle and laptop covered in them and about a year ago I ended up needing both a new water bottle and laptop so getting to go through and pick out all new stickers to decorate them was such a good feeling especially because my interests have grown so much since the time I filled my old ones. I did end up taking all the stickers off of my old laptop because even though it doesn't charge anymore my mom wanted to keep trying just to see if it ever came back on again so she could use it for work but I have pictures to remember how I had it laid out. the only issue with my old water bottle is that I had dropped it too many times over the i think 3 years that I had it so there was a small split in the outer layer so the vacuum seal was gone and it didn't keep my water cold anymore, and my plan with it is that I'll use it as a vase in my dorm this year so I can still look at the stickers on it regularly since I got many of them from very sentimental places
Your channel is helping me so much with shopping and spending. Thank you so much
Really enjoyed this type of video. I think a wishlist can be very helpful. I have one (on a whiteboard on my laptop ) with pictures of the items (non essentials) I want that I visit every now and then. I also write down why I want it, sometimes having to write down why or reading it makes me realize how silly my reasoning is. Next to that I write down any doubts I have about purchasing it like for example a pair of patterned tights I want may not fill a gab in my wardrobe (that I think it would) because I barely wear the patterned ones I already have. I know that maybe sounds a bit weird haha but that often kept me from buying things and made me reach for the things I already have and enjoying them.
i do this in notion and recently had the opportunity to buy something on my wishlist for a good price...and realized i didn't want to. what a relief to finally remove it from my wishlist after all that time
I rationalize every purchase and try to only buy things that will add value, not subtract space. When I buy, I try to make sure its something I didnt already have, or replace something I didnt like. Essentials like food or usable things like clothes have to be replaced more often, obviously. I've been trying to improve my lifestyle and declutter, which conversely means I'm buying more stuff right now to organize the stuff I already have. 😅 Growing up with parents that bought useless stuff and let the essential items be neglected, and that did not understand organization AT ALL, it's been difficult to teach myself how to function in the adult world.
Perfect timing! Literally turned RUclips on to watch some of your videos before I headed to a store for an impulse buy return (I’m at the start of my learning journey) 😅 It would be cool to see your take on impulse shopping at grocery stores. I notice I tend to do that, even though I know I have lots of food at home already. I go to restock on eggs or milk (which I use daily), and then find myself buying other foods in the process. Thankyou for all the help so far! (:
Same! Just came back from target to return clothing I impulsively purchased.
i think sometimes it helps to not take a cart or basket, because then i am limited to what i can carry in my arms. preventing yourself from going down any of the aisles can also help, if you're able to
Such a Valuable video ❤ I love when you said, it's not because somebody recommends a product that you have the budget for it ! It's so helpful to see your thoughts-processes with all the various items.
Okay the purple hat is so cute on youuuu 🥰
"I don't. bye everyone!" ((video over)) lol
For non-consumables, like kitchen gadgets, I have a rule where I have to think that I wish I had one multiple times in a year before it gets added to my wish list. And a pricier item has a higher count threshold to get on the wish list. Cookie press I think I'd use once a year? I can do without and make different recipes.
I've now watched several of your videos and you have got a new subscriber! These are great learning tools and reminders. I think I'll share this channel with my sister too, who definitely has a shopping addiction and gets a massive dopamine rush from it. ❤
A bit off topic but light purple is definitely your color(perhaps the “summer palette” in general ), I’d agree that purchase is reasonable😆
If it helps, I love that olay body wash you got, it's my personal fave and a staple for me! And I'm also an oily skin gal and I'm loving the Milani setting spray, I used to use a Sephora brand but have been working to find drugstore staples instead and it works great!! ❤
Stickers are one of life’s many joys, though I have put a pause on buying any new ones at this point. I know I was over consuming them since I had a subscription where I received new ones each month, but my little 4x6 sticker album is completely full 🙈 I have a track record now of actually using them (it used to be more of a collection when I was younger, as the anxiety of not having it in a “perfect use” situation was overwhelming) so I know I have a collection of stickers to decorate my bullet journal pages to my heart’s content now. It felt good to realize that I needed to make space first, rather than finding a new storage solution to accommodating my overconsumption!
Great video, as always
have you touched on those budget books wirh all the cash pockets?
red bubble has cheap stickers!
Omg I JUST bought a set of Flork of Cow stickers from Red Bubble. They are sooo cute and they were really inexpensive. ❤
As a sticker lover, I strongly approve of that Tamlins Tears sticker! ❤
I have an activities budget for the month. So if it’s not essential to my health or well being beyond basic necessities. It come out of my activities budget regardless of what “subcategory” it may be in.
All that to say this makes me make sure I really want the thing before I buy because this activities budget is small
Kinda off topic, but when I wanted to buy a new car, completely not necessary, mine is fine, just older, I bought a bunch of stickers I loved to put on my car so I would never want to get rid of it 😂. Still collecting stickers on it and every time I see them I get so excited and kind of dread the car every dying
Great video. Please make more of these 😄
Interesting video. 😊 Wish there where also some regrets in there to learn from
Hi Shawna! What items do you think are worth an investment? Whether that means a higher price tag or just a large purchase that you can justify based on situations or circumstances or how they serve you. Maybe by category? Hygiene, Clothing, Household items by rooms (Kichen, Bathroom, Living Room, Bedrooms) Like an investment item- for instance, I have never had a higher quality vacuum and I am a homemaker of 10 years. I use a vacuum daily, sometimes twice a day as my home is 750 sq feet and I have dogs. Nearly every area in our home are high traffic areas. I have gone through several vacuums over the years simply because they can’t keep up with the constant use despite taking such care of them and keeping them clean, many precautions and continuous maintenance. I was tired of repurchasing vacuums and then turning around in a year and they break down or die. So I did purchase a Dyson cordless vacuum and am pleasantly surprised. It is a workhorse and is the absolute best tool I could’ve ever invested in for my role, my home, and my family. I see it as it’s something I use every single day multiple times a day, it’s something that helps me keep my home a clean, safe environment. Not everyone may agree with my decisions but I wanted to know if you could do a video on this in the future. This is a decision that did not come lightly as I have a very hard time with guilt and having a difficult job justifying purchases if they even revolve around myself. This was a long and serious decision that did not come easily or quickly. I had to give myself permission but years prior I would have beat myself up about it and felt buyers’ remorse instantly even if the item or purchase was worthy and benefited me, now I no longer do that and I am so proud because it means I am getting into a healthier mindset. I enjoy your videos and content! You are very eloquent and you speak so clearly with your thoughts and insight. 🤍
Hi Shawna! Which app do you use as the closet tracker?
I use acloset and have a whole video on figuring out which app to use. I talk about and show a few others there if you're interested
@@shawnaripari thanks!
Great video! May I ask which wardrobe tracker app you use?
I use acloset. I made a video in April trying out a bunch so you may find something helpful there
Have you done a wardrobe tour? I’m guessing it’s a minimalist wardrobe and I’d be interested in seeing it.
I've been showing my wardrobe changeovers every season for the past year. If you watch those you can get a sense for my closet! I don't think I'd call it minimalist 😅but you can watch and be the judge
@@shawnaripari, thanks! I’m newer to this channel. You’re probably a minimalist compared to me. I have a shopping problem and am trying to be more mindful.
what wardrobe app do you use
Shawna, I have a request that you please make a video on Code Orange, all these Halloween decor hunting videos. I need to be deinfluenced. You do it so well
there will absolutely be some videos like this coming closer to fall
@@shawnaripari I will try to be patient haha
I need to know what app she's using to track the wears she gets out of her clothes
Acloset
I'm more disturbed by the fact that you call your hats and sweater "her'.
why? this is pretty common in english. although i tend to refer to things with male pronouns instead