@@brianwgDKblacksmiths (and their apprentices) make bolts. Doors can be bolted shut, for which one needs a bolt. Animals and humans who wish to escape can sprint away towards the door - to bolt = to sprint [as Usain Bolt does] but usually in the sense of make an escape, making a bolt for [a passage to] freedom... 🎉
A piece of rope walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve rope here." Rope walks out, ties himself into a knot, only his ends get slightly frayed in the process. Walks back into the bar, sits down, and orders a beer. "Wait a minute," says the bartender, aren't you that rope I just kicked outta here a few minutes ago?" "Nope!" says the rope, "I'm a frayed knot!"
Why do elephants paint their feet yellow? So they can hide upside down in custard!. Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in custard? No? Good aren't they?
@@NonFatMead Well done! It sounds as established of a joke as the "aparent" version, so you should be proud :) When I was very little, I made up a joke and told my mom, and she burst into laughter, but not for the reason I was expecting. "What do deer put on their hotdogs?" "Moose-turd!" I was just trying to do a play on "moose" and "mustard," and didn't even know that "turd" was a word hahaha. It just shocked my mom to hear her small child say it with such confidence and glee, and for the crude joke to actually kinda work hahaha
I've been watching your shorts about the Nordic countries and languages. Now suddenly you have a video with programming, which is also a category of videos I watch. I like it!
Check out his talks in programming conventions, they are really interesting! Talked about making an AI play games sort of like TAS and Doom for example.
@@lauraketteridge324 Finnish would be assembler, Linus's favourite, Danish would be C# or C++(after their inventor) and Swedish would be Rust as everything is forbidden there!
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! I can't stop singing "The green green grass of home". Doctor: That sounds like "Tom Jones syndrome". Patient: Gosh, is it common? Doctor: well, "It's not unusual".
My favourite thing to do in an online discussion is to say "Alright, but this says otherwise [link]" and the link is just an image that literally says "otherwise".
@@olafurw If it happens to only have one chain to generate from, it'll spit out its input data. To prevent this in my markov generator I made it store the score minus two, removing all zero-valued results.
"The hip and cool thing nowadays is to make an AI thingy." Spoken like a true dad! lol My favourite dad joke is "What is brown and sticky? A stick." My dad liked to follow up with "What's pink and sticky?" Most would say a pink stick, but he reply "Bubblegum". I love dad jokes. The cornier the better. And gallows humour, but mine is a little dark for most. lol I love how you nerded out on finding the best dad joke. I love how we human like to try and use tech to objectively answer a subjective question. We are curious critters. "The best joke" made me laugh, but the stick one is still my favourite!
I’m an American computer scientist and I’ve just been watching your comedic shorts about Nordic culture. This content is a surprise, but a welcome one to be sure.
One of my favorites is this variant of the most-commonly-posted one: "What's brown and sticky? A brownie." It only works for people who already know the original "a stick" version, though.
I wish there were a way to filter all of the highly upvoted dad jokes to find out which one had the greatest percentage of angry upvotes. i.e., jokes that make people cringe so hard that they have to upvote just based on principal alone.
Indeed. My favourite is when my jokes are met with the following sequence: A confused look, a tilt or drop of the head, and then one or a couple of nose exhales or a low laugh, then a head shake. Then it's complexity and abstractness is high enough that it takes some processing, and when you get it you appreciate it is indeed a strong dad joke and was funny, but you don't want to laugh at it. Either that or the eye-roll with a smirk I sometimes get from my wife :) While currently on my second paternity leave, I've come to realize the driving force of dad-jokes is sleep deprivation resulting in less suppression of irrelevant but related concepts to the current context of thought entering the mental workspace, potentially combined with slight mental under-stimulation from being away from work. The brain is an associative machine, and we have a lot of connections between words and concepts based on similar sound, analogy, or abstract shared concepts. My wife mistakenly is surprised by how I manage to come up with abstract complex puns as quips in the moment on 4-5 hours of sleep, but my dear, that's what allows conversational aikido style dad-humor. Now for the mandatory dad joke: For fruit flies time flies. Two different meanings of fly, and the insect has only a couple of days of lifespan, which ties it up, plus it flows as a dense one-liner.
An example of a dad joke I pulled on my wife today. We were talking about having hot dogs for lunch, and our boys were playing on the floor next to us. My wife commented on how they were arguing a bit because they wanted to play with the same toy, then returning to the lunch topic and asked "should we boil them or just microwave them", and I said I think that's a bit drastic, maybe we should just put them in their chairs and serve them? And I got a very confused look for a few seconds before a massive eye roll and low laugh while she shook her head. Implicit references are gold for context remixing jokes or puns :)
@@gulllars4620 Hey, at least you have an excuse; you're actually a dad. You should see the looks I get. Someone recently asked me about having children shortly after they had been previously talking about having a food item. Naturally, I informed them I that wasn't comfortable eating children, but perhaps I could have them if bbq sauce was provided. It did not go over well.
@@Cardboardruna I've had dry punny humor a long time before i had kids, so i know :) though my humor then was more computer nerdy, science based or language/linguistics quirks, while after having kids it has generalized more.
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his breeches. The bartender comes over, takes a look, and asks, "Do you know you have a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?" "Aye," says the pirate ruefully, "It's drivin' me nuts."
What's a clock's favorite time of day? 6:30, hands down. What's a Mexican Magician's favorite breakfast food? Toast-tada! (Tostada) A magician is driving down the street, and he turns into a driveway!
This could be a reference to the movie Monster. Horrible thing to say that a child has a pig brain, an actual pig brain. No simile, no analogy, no metafor.
Somebody stole my trainers but left their camouflage jacket behind. They can run but they can't hide. What do you call a psychic midget on the run from the police? A small medium at large. There were two cows in a field. One said "Moooooo!" The other said "Damn, I was about to say that!"
Wait but what about the rest? Numbers 2-20? 21-100? Come on let’s hear ‘em. I can’t deal with any more politics. I need dad jokes. Snail jokes, if you got those, too.
@@resourceress7 Oh, he totally is! No one's criticizing his shorter videos! I love his shorts, and pounce on watching a new one whenever one comes out! All that's being said here is that as awesome as he is, we want to see more of him, and so, hence, the desire for longer videos! It's a compliment, not by any means a criticism of his shorter work!
@@lauraketteridge324 Not surprised. AI or not, the joke does not translate well as it contains a double entendre. The word «fåredrag» literally translates into «mutton-pull», which, outside this joke doesn’t carry any meaning. But what the Norwegian speaking listener hears is the word «foredrag» (spelt slightly different but has the same pronounciation), which means «lecture». So the joke lies in the double meaning of that one word. There. I explained - and ruined it - for you 😁
@@diomedes8791 Definitely not 'ruined'. It didn't make sense to be before, but now I have some understanding. I even managed to make a good attempt at the pronunciation of 'foredrag'. I was already rather smug because I saw a post that had the word 'Antikkvarehuset ' in it, and I understood without any thought.
I'm glad this popped up on my home page even though I'm subscribed, RUclips somehow didn't show it to me in my subscription feed. Despite me interacting with all your shorts.
My Mother-In Law actually drove my wife and me in her car and if a door was left open, a voice announced, "A door is ajar." My wife and I would crack up but my M-I-L didn't get it.
Cool video. I decided to try and make another dad joke: Dr. Watson and Sherlock Holmes have received a mysterious letter from Moriarty: Watson: "This doesn't make any sense. Why would he write "Supersoakers fire water into the air?" Homes: "It's elemental, my dear Watson."
If a cat on a boat is called a ship's cat, what is a dog on a submarine called? A subwoofer. A ship's cat catches rats, what does a subwoofer catch? Bass.
I bought a wooden whistle, but it wooden whistle. So I bought a steel whistle, and it steel wooden whistle. Finally I got a tin whistle, and now I tin whistle. (My dad, ca. 1955)
Best dad joke I ever did was when I answered someone's comment about their own dad making a joke. It was a joke about how the Americans where half-way there to make the Japanese speak English (I think, the comment I answered to was on a video made private). "You could say that they where "Midway" into changing from English to Japanese 🤪" response I got was "are you my dad"m that was quite funny..
When that funny, unassuming guy on RUclips turns out to be really smart too. 😍👍 The Best Dad Joke certainly works. Even though I'd heard it before, it got a solid guffaw out of me.
But seriously a graph with the Scandi-Nordic languages. Maybe plus Frisian and Old English. Like, we could call it BabelFish or something. Probably not taken.
I asked my dog what's two minus two. He said nothing.
So he was a hushpuppy?
@@olafurwLOL! 🤣
Asked my cat she agreed
I asked my goldfish, and he agreed, too.
I asked my appetite: totally a greed.
I bought a dog from a blacksmith.
As soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door.
I dont get it???
@@brianwgDKblacksmiths (and their apprentices) make bolts. Doors can be bolted shut, for which one needs a bolt. Animals and humans who wish to escape can sprint away towards the door - to bolt = to sprint [as Usain Bolt does] but usually in the sense of make an escape, making a bolt for [a passage to] freedom... 🎉
@@nolongerlistless I have never heard the word used that way but I kinda guessed from context because realistically what else could it mean here
Funniest joke I've heard in a long time! I could visualize that dog getting out the tongs and hammer and banging away.
How do you measure the quality of a dad joke?
With a sighsmometer.
Ooohhh! Reading that hurt .... it was a sigh for sore eyes!
A sighs-mom-meter.... It tracks how moms sigh in reaction to a dad joke
That was only 2/3 of a pun: P. U., it stunk.
Helium walks into a bar.
The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve noble gases in here..
And helium doesn’t react.
In chemistry, beer really is a solution!
A piece of rope walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve rope here." Rope walks out, ties himself into a knot, only his ends get slightly frayed in the process. Walks back into the bar, sits down, and orders a beer. "Wait a minute," says the bartender, aren't you that rope I just kicked outta here a few minutes ago?" "Nope!" says the rope, "I'm a frayed knot!"
"A beer, please"
_A neutrino walks into a bar._
When does a joke become a dad joke?
- When it becomes apparent :-)
I actually really liked that flamingo joke, and it's a new one on me. It was all worth it!
But did he stop peeing down his legs to stay cool?
I like it a lot too haha 😁
Why don't you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they're so good at it.
Why do elephants paint their balls red? - So they can hide in cherry trees.
What's the loudest sound in the forest? - A giraf eating cherries.
How do you get an elephant in the fridge?
Open fridge, put in elephant, close fridge...
How do you get a giraffe in a fridge?
Open fridge door, take out elephant, put in giraffe, close fridge door...
Why do elephants paint their feet yellow? So they can hide upside down in custard!. Have you ever seen an elephant hiding in custard? No? Good aren't they?
Truly the most resourceful of the ant species.
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it's fully groan.
Omg this is the first one on these comments I haven’t heard… and it’s awesome❤ will inflict it on my family today, 🙏
@@CrepuscularChaotI’m glad. It was a spur of the moment joke I made once and I was giddily happy with it.
@@NonFatMead Well done! It sounds as established of a joke as the "aparent" version, so you should be proud :)
When I was very little, I made up a joke and told my mom, and she burst into laughter, but not for the reason I was expecting.
"What do deer put on their hotdogs?"
"Moose-turd!"
I was just trying to do a play on "moose" and "mustard," and didn't even know that "turd" was a word hahaha. It just shocked my mom to hear her small child say it with such confidence and glee, and for the crude joke to actually kinda work hahaha
I've been watching your shorts about the Nordic countries and languages. Now suddenly you have a video with programming, which is also a category of videos I watch. I like it!
Me too! I was waiting for a punchline about how you write the python script in Swedish or whatever.. 😆
@@joostdriesens3984 I feel Python would be better in Finnish. Danish would be C.
Check out his talks in programming conventions, they are really interesting! Talked about making an AI play games sort of like TAS and Doom for example.
@@lauraketteridge324 Finnish would be assembler, Linus's favourite, Danish would be C# or C++(after their inventor) and Swedish would be Rust as everything is forbidden there!
And icelandic is ASM 😳
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! I can't stop singing "The green green grass of home".
Doctor: That sounds like "Tom Jones syndrome".
Patient: Gosh, is it common?
Doctor: well, "It's not unusual".
I decided to sell my old vacuum cleaner......well, it was just collecting dust.
Damn it, you made me laugh. Have not read that one in ages. 😂😂
Yes but did you hear the worst vacuum joke? It sucks.
It's cool that you're doing full videos now! I usually like jokes about chemistry, but I don't get many reactions.
I do inorganic chemistry jokes but I can't make a living.
And all the good ones argon.
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
The most magnetising stand-up comedian I've seen was a Pole.
c'mon, the joke "so here's the thing..." followed by a picture of The Thing was gold
100% and it's funnier because the URL delays the delivery of the punchline perfectly.
My favourite thing to do in an online discussion is to say "Alright, but this says otherwise [link]" and the link is just an image that literally says "otherwise".
A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Is this stool taken?".......
That clobberin time one is peak AI dad joke.
Wasn't AI made, but the Markov Chain generator decided to pull a URL out from the dataset and put it there. For some reason.
@@olafurw If it happens to only have one chain to generate from, it'll spit out its input data. To prevent this in my markov generator I made it store the score minus two, removing all zero-valued results.
@olafurw at least it was an image of the thing
I actually really liked that joke! "Here's the thing" and then it shows a picture of The Thing.
Pirate enters the room. His bird squawks, "Pieces of nine! Pieces of nine!"
The pirate sighs, "yarr. It's a parrory error"
10/10
Dat's not a Dad Joke, but it's funny.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
"Aye matey!"
@@Pining_for_the_fjords This is a true Dad joke. It made me groan.
@@Pining_for_the_fjords 🏆
Have you heard what's been making the headlines recently? Corduroy pillowcases.
I admit, that took me a second. 😂
Do you know why the Norwegian navy started putting barcodes on their ships?
When they return to port, they can Scandinavian.
"The hip and cool thing nowadays is to make an AI thingy." Spoken like a true dad! lol
My favourite dad joke is "What is brown and sticky? A stick."
My dad liked to follow up with "What's pink and sticky?" Most would say a pink stick, but he reply "Bubblegum".
I love dad jokes. The cornier the better. And gallows humour, but mine is a little dark for most. lol
I love how you nerded out on finding the best dad joke. I love how we human like to try and use tech to objectively answer a subjective question. We are curious critters.
"The best joke" made me laugh, but the stick one is still my favourite!
I went to a zoo but it only had one animal, a dog.
It was a shihtzu
This is too good to be a dad joke 😂
From what I recall, there was a zoo in China that used a dog as a lion.
Ah, my father. He had the heart of a lion and, as a result, a lifetime ban from the zoo.
I’m an American computer scientist and I’ve just been watching your comedic shorts about Nordic culture. This content is a surprise, but a welcome one to be sure.
That's weird. I was looking for Nordic jokes. And I landed here.
Dad 1: I've decided not to vaccinate my kids.
Dad 2: (Hard glare)
Dad 1: What? I figure it's better if their doctor does it.
This needs more thumbs up so here you go… 👍 👍 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
One of my favorites is this variant of the most-commonly-posted one: "What's brown and sticky? A brownie." It only works for people who already know the original "a stick" version, though.
What's soft and slippery?
@@granthicks2030 A slipper.
A good follow up is:
What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?
Dr Dre
I would argue that a joke falling flat is a hallmark of a great Dad joke.
the Best Dad joke doesn't need to be the best joke.
I wish there were a way to filter all of the highly upvoted dad jokes to find out which one had the greatest percentage of angry upvotes. i.e., jokes that make people cringe so hard that they have to upvote just based on principal alone.
Indeed. My favourite is when my jokes are met with the following sequence: A confused look, a tilt or drop of the head, and then one or a couple of nose exhales or a low laugh, then a head shake. Then it's complexity and abstractness is high enough that it takes some processing, and when you get it you appreciate it is indeed a strong dad joke and was funny, but you don't want to laugh at it. Either that or the eye-roll with a smirk I sometimes get from my wife :)
While currently on my second paternity leave, I've come to realize the driving force of dad-jokes is sleep deprivation resulting in less suppression of irrelevant but related concepts to the current context of thought entering the mental workspace, potentially combined with slight mental under-stimulation from being away from work. The brain is an associative machine, and we have a lot of connections between words and concepts based on similar sound, analogy, or abstract shared concepts. My wife mistakenly is surprised by how I manage to come up with abstract complex puns as quips in the moment on 4-5 hours of sleep, but my dear, that's what allows conversational aikido style dad-humor.
Now for the mandatory dad joke:
For fruit flies time flies.
Two different meanings of fly, and the insect has only a couple of days of lifespan, which ties it up, plus it flows as a dense one-liner.
An example of a dad joke I pulled on my wife today. We were talking about having hot dogs for lunch, and our boys were playing on the floor next to us. My wife commented on how they were arguing a bit because they wanted to play with the same toy, then returning to the lunch topic and asked "should we boil them or just microwave them", and I said I think that's a bit drastic, maybe we should just put them in their chairs and serve them? And I got a very confused look for a few seconds before a massive eye roll and low laugh while she shook her head. Implicit references are gold for context remixing jokes or puns :)
@@gulllars4620 Hey, at least you have an excuse; you're actually a dad. You should see the looks I get.
Someone recently asked me about having children shortly after they had been previously talking about having a food item. Naturally, I informed them I that wasn't comfortable eating children, but perhaps I could have them if bbq sauce was provided.
It did not go over well.
@@Cardboardruna I've had dry punny humor a long time before i had kids, so i know :) though my humor then was more computer nerdy, science based or language/linguistics quirks, while after having kids it has generalized more.
Ok, but like the "Here's the thing" is actually a coherent and decent dad joke.
Oh my god I didn't even get it until just now.
@@spugintrntlsame
My favourite is: A teenager tells his Dad, "I'm old enough to drive the car!", but the Dad answers, "Yeah, but the car isn't!" 😊
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his breeches. The bartender comes over, takes a look, and asks, "Do you know you have a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?" "Aye," says the pirate ruefully, "It's drivin' me nuts."
Dad jokes are just how eye roll.
Him- I tell dad jokes
Me- does he laugh?
Him- what?
Me- get out .
True story .
What's a clock's favorite time of day?
6:30, hands down.
What's a Mexican Magician's favorite breakfast food?
Toast-tada! (Tostada)
A magician is driving down the street, and he turns into a driveway!
Your hard work is valued 😄
Doctor doctor, I think I'm turning into a pig.
Don't worry, you can be cured.
This could be a reference to the movie Monster.
Horrible thing to say that a child has a pig brain, an actual pig brain. No simile, no analogy, no metafor.
Dr. Lecter, I presume?
That was good of the doctor to calm him down, so he didn't go ham.
Yo... The Thing is my new favorite dad joke. Next level.
How much does pirate corn cost?
It's a buck an ear!
That is super groan-worthy; well done.
It is indeed clobbering time.
The fact that the AI actually included a [removed] into the joke is pretty hilarious
Yep, it got fed Reddit data indeed
The depressed cow could only make the sound a sheep makes.
It had a moo disorder.
Damn, that's a groaner.
A good dad joke is groan up.
It will be a parent when you hear it
That is indeed the Thing
Thing or AI Thingy?
The blue thing. Which is blue in the thing.@@olafurw
@@olafurwit’s the character “The Thing”
“A student ... went swimming and almost drowned. So now he swears he'll never get into water until he's really learned to swim.”
Olafur really let his nerd out, and I love it
Can we call him "Ollie"?
And until now I thought you are mostly a dude who speaks a lot of the nordic languages and makes funny things with them on the internet.
My grade 6 science teacher:
Why did the Mushroom go to the party?
Because he was a fungi.
Why did the female mushroom go to the party?
Because she was a fungal.
Somebody stole my trainers but left their camouflage jacket behind. They can run but they can't hide.
What do you call a psychic midget on the run from the police? A small medium at large.
There were two cows in a field. One said "Moooooo!" The other said "Damn, I was about to say that!"
Love it, this is the proper use of data analytical skills 😁
dad analytical
Canadian in Germany Dad joke:
What comes between fear and sex?
.
.
.
.
Fünf!
😂😂😂
Oida...
brb, gotta deal with these cats in my sink
Wait but what about the rest? Numbers 2-20? 21-100? Come on let’s hear ‘em. I can’t deal with any more politics. I need dad jokes. Snail jokes, if you got those, too.
I think he said that "snail jokes" are too slow.
The flamingo one is definitely the best one of all of those.
Shorts are funny but I will always prefer a good video, hope you do more
That's the idea. Thank you.
@@olafurwYEAY!!!!! 💖💖💖
I think he's doing a great job with both types
@@resourceress7 Oh, he totally is! No one's criticizing his shorter videos! I love his shorts, and pounce on watching a new one whenever one comes out! All that's being said here is that as awesome as he is, we want to see more of him, and so, hence, the desire for longer videos! It's a compliment, not by any means a criticism of his shorter work!
I personally prefer pants, but each to their own
What's the best dad joke of all time ? 'Best dad joke of all time'
I tried to make a joke on the fly, but it flew away.
I accidentally swallowed a bucket of paint. I'm okay now though, just dyed a little inside.
Watching your TikToks, I never in a 1000 years would've thought you were a programmer... Cool!
I'm a programmer?
@@olafurw Yeah, it's like being an amateurgrammer but getting paid for it.
This was glorious, thank you!
No it was @Olafurw
What's the difference between a piano, a fish, and a can of glue?
You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish.
I get the feeling I'm falling into a trap, but what about the can of glue?
@alexwright6816 You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish...
The glue? Well, that's what everyone gets stuck on.
Norwegian Dad joke from the 70s (before the term Dad joke was invented):
Q: Hva får du hvis du drar en sau i halen?
A: Et fåredrag.
The AI Thingy that is Google Translate did not do a good job with this Norwegian Dad Joke. :(
@@lauraketteridge324 Not surprised. AI or not, the joke does not translate well as it contains a double entendre. The word «fåredrag» literally translates into «mutton-pull», which, outside this joke doesn’t carry any meaning. But what the Norwegian speaking listener hears is the word «foredrag» (spelt slightly different but has the same pronounciation), which means «lecture». So the joke lies in the double meaning of that one word.
There. I explained - and ruined it - for you 😁
@@diomedes8791 Definitely not 'ruined'. It didn't make sense to be before, but now I have some understanding. I even managed to make a good attempt at the pronunciation of 'foredrag'.
I was already rather smug because I saw a post that had the word 'Antikkvarehuset ' in it, and I understood without any thought.
Why did Ken and Barby never start a family?
Ken came in a different box.
Loved the process, but I am a certified nerd
I'm glad this popped up on my home page even though I'm subscribed, RUclips somehow didn't show it to me in my subscription feed. Despite me interacting with all your shorts.
What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?
Well I've never had a lentil on my face.
Eewwwwwwwwwwww😂
When is a door not a door?
When it's ajar
My Mother-In Law actually drove my wife and me in her car and if a door was left open, a voice announced, "A door is ajar." My wife and I would crack up but my M-I-L didn't get it.
You should make more of this content😮😊
Love scandinavia, but overanalyzing things with IT is good too.
Cool video. I decided to try and make another dad joke:
Dr. Watson and Sherlock Holmes have received a mysterious letter from Moriarty:
Watson: "This doesn't make any sense. Why would he write "Supersoakers fire water into the air?"
Homes: "It's elemental, my dear Watson."
Kudos to the AI for "So here's the thing..." It's not a great joke, but it was coherent and made sense.
The end. Literally crying with laughter. Its hard to type.
I was looking up at my ceiling the other day and I don't know if its the best ceiling, but its definitely up there.
What runs all around a farm without getting tired? The fence.
Unimaginably happy the stick joke is here...
Hey, the Thing joke was actually pretty good. It was the THING!
this is the best kind of content
That's some great code you made there, because the flamingo joke is solidly funny. A+ work. Full benefits.
I loved the video and how it shows a different side of you.
You won't be saying the same when he sits on the camera
absolutely best process ever
"Short Jokes are not funny" really explains a lot of your channel.
Most bad dad jokes are just puns, so be a puny dad.
My dad is so puny he needs a ladder to get out of a matchbox.
Fight the punic wars.
You, my dear, are a glorious geek! This is a brilliant video.
NGL the one with the clobberin time got me.
If a cat on a boat is called a ship's cat, what is a dog on a submarine called? A subwoofer. A ship's cat catches rats, what does a subwoofer catch? Bass.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because the light turned green.
What goes through the bug's head upon hitting the car windshield?
His butt, ye dummies!
(lil darker, but still dad joke anyway)
I’m hungry
Hi hungry I’m dad.
Every dad for Millenia I’m sure
Great approach
A Swinglish Dad joke,
What should you make an exit out of?
It should be a hay door.
As a Marvel fan: Hey now, that "here's the thing" joke was funny...Though i suppose they are difficult to read out loud...
You are the best. Always make me smile. Thanks
I bought a wooden whistle, but it wooden whistle. So I bought a steel whistle, and it steel wooden whistle. Finally I got a tin whistle, and now I tin whistle. (My dad, ca. 1955)
Best dad joke I ever did was when I answered someone's comment about their own dad making a joke. It was a joke about
how the Americans where half-way there to make the Japanese speak English (I think, the comment I answered to
was on a video made private).
"You could say that they where "Midway" into changing from English to Japanese 🤪"
response I got was "are you my dad"m that was quite funny..
When that funny, unassuming guy on RUclips turns out to be really smart too. 😍👍
The Best Dad Joke certainly works. Even though I'd heard it before, it got a solid guffaw out of me.
Wow, I wish I had half as much free time as this guy.
0:40 - Thats a Diamond Monster 3D graphics card based on a 3Dfx Voodoo 1. it only does 3D so i get why it isn't much use to computing dad jokes.
But seriously a graph with the Scandi-Nordic languages. Maybe plus Frisian and Old English. Like, we could call it BabelFish or something. Probably not taken.
I dont understand. What graph?
Just found your second comment. Please dont tell me you leave 2 comments in an ocean 100 and hope for someone to connect them.
What's orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot
Long winters can do this to a man. Allegedly, Freud's favourite joke was How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
Except elephants, they can't jump.
Icelandic nerds. Removing the humour from EVERYTHING since 930AD.
Please do more of these
Ok I don't know why, but the taco emergency dial 9 joke made me laugh. I'm wondering if it has something to do with being 3 in the morning.
I dunno, dude... Those Markov chain ones were pretty funny, actually, especially the image one.
At first I though this was going to be one of those realistic Incredible face meme.
I used to work at a crematorium. The boss had no appreciation for a guy just trying to urn a living every day.