Comedian Wears a Dress To Protest TN Law - Steve Hofstetter
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 13 мар 2023
- Two days after Tennessee passed its broadly phrased anti-drag law, I was performing in Chattanooga. So I did what anyone would for a big show - I dressed up.
WATCH NEXT: • Heckler Promotes His C...
SUBSCRIBE: bit.ly/SubHof |||| LIVE SHOWS: bit.ly/SeeHof
WATCH NEXT: bit.ly/WatchHof
Comedian Wears a Dress To Protest TN Law - Steve Hofstetter
Featuring @BrettDruckComedy and Jon Bander
LIVE SHOWS: bit.ly/SeeHof
PATREON: bit.ly/PatreonHof
TWITTER: bit.ly/TwitterHof
FACEBOOK PAGES: bit.ly/FacebookHof | bit.ly/FacebookHof2
FACEBOOK PROFILE: bit.ly/FBHof
REDDIT: bit.ly/RedditHof
INSTAGRAM: bit.ly/InstagramHof
SNAPCHAT: bit.ly/SnapchatHof
FREE COMEDY SPECIAL (4K): bit.ly/SecretOptimist
Subscribe to Steve Hofstetter's videos for more full, free stand-up comedy, comedy movies, hecklers getting owned, and more! bit.ly/SubHof
Copyright 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021 
Приколы
If you like this, and want to see my videos before they’re made public, please consider supporting my Patreon. www.Patreon.com/SteveHofstetter
you rocked that dress..
THANK YOU!!! *This* is _exactly_ what must be done! Bravo!
NICE YOU GO STEVE
*That part at the end, about how it felt to buy the dress and try it on, made me understand something that never even clicked in my brain.*
Actually made my eyes water-up just a little. iThink we need more people expressing how these simple day to day parts of living, become emotionally charged events that can be soul-crushing, when these laws and attacks are made on LGBTQ+ people. Good on ya, mate. Well done!
I've probably seen like 200 of your videos and this is the best one by far. That's one of the stupidest laws I've ever heard of. Who cares what clothes you wear. It's the character inside that matters
Damn right!! I'm a 60 year old straight guy, tug boat Capt. I spent my life providing for my family, working like a dog, chewing nails and spitting out salt water. Never understood bigotry or the weak men who demonstrate it. Let people be people and be respectful, just because you don't understand it matters not a bit.
Judging by your comment I'm sure you're a morally admirable person who cares for others. But with all due respect, you are incredibly naive if you think this is about people who just want to live their lives in peace. That couldn't possibly be further from the truth.
@@uthmanibn-jafar1159 You are naive if you think people cannot demonize others to serve their agenda. Trans people and drag artists are not the ones harming kids, so the next question is who/what is this scapegoating serving? Are you mature enough to look for the answer to that question?
@@uthmanibn-jafar1159 of course it is. Our society evolves, it always has. It's all part of having a healthy world.
@@uthmanibn-jafar1159
It is the true.
People just tryin exist lol
What you like the fools that assert they want MORE RIGHTs than the average citizen?
Equal rights isn’t enough. That want to be better and lmao it’s so stupid I can’t 😂
@@uthmanibn-jafar1159People have stopped trans rights bills with so many maybe’s, what if’s, and problably’s, but I’ve yet to hear a shred of legitimate evidence of trans people being uniquely harmful.
It’s just a bunch of people assuming the worst about a group of people who they never truly tried to understand.
As a trans woman, it took years to gain the confidence to step into a dressing room and have the right to be there just like every other woman. I'm really fortunate, because I realize some women will die before they experience that kind of public acceptance or even self acceptance
You're not a woman.
@@redrick8900 And you're not human
I'm so happy for you sister :) ❤
no.
See that’s the thing , you say it’s your right but do you not care about the biological women who say it’s their right to not have a biological man in their space. Do you not support women’s rights?
Reminds me (on a very different scale) of that time a gender fluid kid at my school got suspended for wearing "the other gender's uniform" when they tried wearing a skirt at school. For the entire next week, guys in every school in our town wore skirts to show support and prove how silly this suspension was. Even the national news got involved and our school had to let everyone wear whatever uniform was most comfortable for them regardless of gender as well as drop the suspension for the gender fluid kid. Wanna know the fun part? This was never in the rules to begin with since most of the uniform was gender neutral and afab students were always free to wear ANY part of the uniform they wanted. The reason I'm sharing this is that it's important to call bigotry bullshit out. We might not know what it will change, if anything, but it's not an excuse to not try. Props to you for being part of those people who do something.
Hearing young people take a stand like this is what gives me hope. Actually, Gen Z is the only reason that I feel hope these days. They shouldn’t have to save us all but they just might do it anyway
Acts of solidarity can means so much to someone who feels alone for being who they are.
so if someone who “seemed like they should wear a skirt” wore pants the same thing would happen? that’s stupid sorry that happened to people close to you
Don’t get me wrong this is really inspiring but it discourages me so much to know people at my school would never do anything like this.
@@alexwyatt2911 I will survive another 25-30 years (if I am lucky). Thing will not have gone completely to hell by then I think (apart from things like wars and the law mentioned in this video). so gen Z will not have to save me (but they will support my retirement, just as I support the retirement of my parents): What I want (but will likely not see), is gen Z saving themselves into the future that I will never see.
I never expected it was possible for someone who is not trans to describe an experience they went through that usually only trans people have to go through. Honestly that story at the end was just so nice to listen to. Thank you for being such a great ally to our community, Steve.
This is what is called 'good trouble' and we need a LOT more of it NOW. Thanks for standing for a community facing OUTRIGHT discrimination. The bit at the end made me shed a tear. Nice work. Thanks.
I was afraid it would be a performative stunt. I'm so glad I was wrong. ❤❤❤
I wish he'd brought a selection of forward thinking books to aution off also during this set in drag to really hammer this point home.
“Good Trouble.”
John Wells
@@aishashaw5885 Did you mean John Lewis?
Lewis yes
I'm trans, and I definitely feel that "I don't want to make other people feel uncomfortable" thing anytime I go into a bathroom or dressing room. I've actually been harassed in a bathroom before, and I'm sure it won't be the last time either. Honestly, thank you Steve for using your platform for more than just making people laugh, it's important as an ally to use whatever you can to show support. So thank you.
The day I delt with physical harassment using the men's room was the last time I used the men's room.
@@VictoriousjiaIt doesn't make me uncomfortable so it must be their problem.
Same here. Thank you Steve. You are trying to change things and it will work.
I was there when my dad legally changed her name when she transitioned and afterward at lunch was the first time she used a public restroom for women. Nobody freaked out, the earth didn't crack open, and no babies were sacrificed. It was a huge first step for her confidences on her journey.
@@Rage867 I just wanted to say, I'm so happy for her. She's valid and braver than any transphobe will ever be.
As a Tennessee native, and a trans woman, the solidarity is heartwarming, and I absolutely love this performance.
oh shit hi roslyn!
As a drag queen, thank you so much for being an ally. It takes a lot of balls to step out onto a stage in a dress and it takes even more to make a statement with it.
When you started talking about your experience buying the dress. When you went to try it on, and you had to pause. "Men and women's, which one do I use? I don't want to make other people uncomfortable." And that moment of true empathy and realization.
As a trans person, I cannot tell you how much it means to me to hear that.
Thank you for doing this, thank you for supporting us.
Thanks. I think it's really important to pull back the conversation to the actual experiences that people struggle with. I think there are lots of compassionate people out there (including me) who just get caught up in feelings about being told what we should think or feel and lose sight of the actual experiences that people face in daily life.
If we could focus a bit more on the actual experiences of individuals and less on which tribe we are in I think we could make progress.
As a cis guy, I had the same realization when he had it. It never even occurred to me that y'all are trying to keep everyone else from feeling uncomfortable just as much as yourselves. I work with several trans individuals that I absolutely adore and I always worry if there is something I am inadvertently doing to make them uncomfortable. They are nearly half my age, just kids really, and they have such a battle ahead of them. They are incredibly brave to be being themselves in rural Oregon (read:the south of the west coast)
As a straight man who's done drag since first grade that question really hit a spot emotionally and psychologically. This is what I love about Steve, he's so unapologetically supportive of others.
@@davidgriffin9247 If you are ever wondering if you are inadvertantly doing something to make trans individuals uncomfortable, just *ask* them in a respectful way. They will be happy to answer you, and then you won't have to wonder and worry anymore.
I am apparently "The Devil" (white, hetero, lower-middle class, atheist, college graduate, former military service) and I applaud anyone who stands up to idiocy and evil.
And I, at least morally, support anyone who wants to live their life their way as long as it does not intentionally harm others to do so. (And moral outrage doesn't count as harm!)
-
I only hate individuals for the things they do and say, and not the identity they have, or any of their born properties (race, gender, hair color, nationality, etc.)
As a trans guy, I appreciate the absolute hell out of this man. That last little bit at the end did get me teary eyed, because holy shit is it rare to get a cisgendered individual to understand just how difficult it really is for us. We are constantly terrified because of the closed mindedness of the people around us, and even more terrified of the potential violence we might face. Even here in a liberal state I've experienced aggressive transphobia that put me in fear of my life, and the worst part was I had to keep seeing the offender at work. My employer did nothing to help me, only the bear minimum to basically be kept safe from any sort of lawsuits or legal action. We just want to exist, we just wanna know that we'll be okay, which is why transitioning is one of the scariest things I think I might ever have to do. It takes years, and for a lot of people several surgical procedures, to stop being seen as our assigned gender, not to mention my amazing non binary siblings out there who have to fight this bigotry far more than some.
This life is cruel, but your fellow neighbor is crueler.
I think I have some understanding of how you feel. Recently, I was exchanging comments on social media with an individual who was very anti-drag, anti-trans, anti-gay etc. His comments progressed from, “ I just don’t believe in men wearing dresses” point of view to full on hate speech in calling transgender people abominations and demons. (Guess I pressed a button, when I reminded him that Jesus wore a dress.) This guy began to threaten violence, and I became alarmed. I used to bartend, so I’ve dealt with some unreasonable assholes in my time, but this exchange had turned into something frighteningly different. I am not a person that is easily rattled, but I admit that guy’s hateful comments invoked a deeply disturbing sense of being in imminent danger. I felt physically nauseous and anxious at the thought of what if this lunatic somehow tracked me down, or worse, what if I inadvertently provoked this nut job and he hurts someone. I can only imagine how much more those feelings would be amplified if that exchange had occurred in person. I shudder to think about what could happen if my daughter, who identifies as a nonbinary trans person, ever crossed paths with such a hateful person. I flagged his comments. I reported the account for hate speech. I work for a small printing company. We specialize in banners and billboards. I outright refuse to print any message that promotes hate. I draw the line at false political propaganda as well. I’m glad the company I work for supports those views. I wouldn’t work there, if they didn’t. I don’t vote for politicians who condone or ignore hate speech and violence. It’s the very least I can do to support human rights. No matter how you identify, you have the right to exist in peace with dignity and respect. I just wanted you to know that support for transgender people from cisgender folks may not be as rare as you think. I suspect some support for the transgender community may just be out of sight, perhaps even hiding in a few closets. I’ll do my best to open some doors. I wish you well.
@@michellereed3272 thank you for the support! And yeah, sometimes ally support can be hard to find for one reason or another, and especially since the wrong oftentimes scream louder than everyone, it begins to feel like an absolute wind tunnel of hatred.
I appreciate what you do do for the community and for human rights as a whole, and I'm sure a ton of others would agree with me. We need more people like you in my opinion, not just because there's a lot of people who think I should be dead, but simply because the world would be a better place.
I hope you're well as well, you deserve so many smiles throughout your life 😁
You must really enjoy your little fantasy world. Sad. Get some help
@ Michelle Reed unfortunately, it’s not a matter of “if” - rather it’s a matter of “when.” Best to prepare for real-life encounters like the one you had online. I hope everyone stays safe 🙏
"It takes years, and for a lot of people several surgical procedures, to stop being seen as our assigned gender" - What you say here, sadly, doesn't even apply to all trans women that do get a bunch of surgeries. For many of us who transitioned later in life (I was almost 60), it's hopeless to dream that we might ever be "passable" as women. I'm 6'-1" and 300 pounds - I've always been big, and bulky, and in group photos where I'm surrounded by AFAB women, I stand out a full head taller and way "bulkier" than any other woman in that photo. My face doesn't look overtly masculine, thank God, but I'm so huge that there's just no way that I'll ever be passable. I'm so sorry that you've been harassed at work and that your employer isn't helping you. This is inexcusable, but all too frequent.
So much respect. I am an old cis-mom with 3 adult cis sons, and... I have done my best to teach them a lifetime path of inclusivity. To make everyone feel welcomed, loved, and comfortable with being who they are.
What is Cis? Nevermind. I'm sure I don't need to know.
@@Long-legged On the off chance you don't actually know what it means, cis is a Latin prefix meaning "on the same side." Cis is used as a short hand to mean "not trans." Usually it's just a helpful word when talking about gender stuff.
@@ThePurpleCheeseMan gender stuff. I think I have 9 words. It has worked for me for decades. Nobody has ever been mistaken.
Boy, girl
Man, woman
Guy, gal
He, she
Confused(boy or girl)
@@Long-legged Okay, just confirming. You can choose to dumb down your vocabulary if you wish, but Latin and gender non-conformity has existed for much longer than you. I hope you can find more purpose in life than heckling people in RUclips comments for being different than you.
@Long-legged Well, now you have is and trans, bit as long as you apply the others properly you should not even have to use cis or trans. Just make sure you give them as people feel appropriate.
This man has more courage in his pinky than every comedian that complains about cancel culture combined.
That part at the end… I’ve never heard someone who isn’t trans describe that feeling so eloquently and perfectly before. I’m glad we have people like you on our side :’D
The part at the end doesn't make sense. Men and women's changeroom are not open, so people can see you naked as you change. Doors are closed, and there are mirrors inside so you can see how you look. I don't see how he would feel uncomfortable. Changerooms are not built like urinal stalls where the walls only go up part way.
@@dh5549 If someone sees you carrying a dress from the ladies department to the mens? Or sees you, a man, changing in the ladies'? Or asks you, "Are you looking for a gift for your wife or girlfriend?" You can't imagine how someone might feel uncomfortable? Just do it yourself, and see. Just imagine doing it, if you can't bring yourself to try doing so. Feel those butterflies of anxiety already? Now, imagine that is your every day experience.
@@dh5549 Many stores have men's departments and women's departments, with their own changing rooms. It's EXTREMELY uncomfortable to stand out, especially during a time where an entire political party is trying to make it seem like trans people are inherently dangerous. It's also a terrifying time to start transitioning, which is the situation I'm in. I'm just grateful my state is passing protections for trans people.
But the truth is you're partly right... There are full doors and locks on changing rooms, so it SHOULD be nobody's business what clothes other people want to try on. We just need to get past the moral panic.
@@millenial90 yes thisssss
And even when the changing rooms aren’t gendered, it could still feel uncomfortable cause you’re like “if people see me going into a changing room with these clothes, they’re gonna think I’m weird” 😭
@@dh5549 You have no idea how narrow peoples mind is. I went to buy T-shirts for gym and I like the "men" type. The sales lady just couldn't process; "But it's for men!!!!" came out of her mouth like 5-6 times. People like that would totally feel free to preach to you in the middle of the store even if they don't know you.
Also not all stores put mirrors on the inside.
I ended up going back to the closet, cause it was just too much to handle daily as an out trans person.
as a straight white man who thought he was open enough to understand everyone's POV, this hit hard. I thought that I knew that it was OK to be something non-specific. But you made me take a step back and empathize with anyone who could be non-specific... thank you
🥰keep that heart open and that mind bright, gives me hope
Non-specific? Do you mean non conformist?
@@lakeshoresubtleties I was more referencing non-binary, but I suppose that applies too.
Good keep using empathy skills
as someone who is nonbinary, this gives me a bit of hope. thanks for being open to extending some empathy our way, not everyone even thinks to try that.
I have trans friends, seeing their struggle to not make other ppl uncomfortable is heart breaking. Thnx for doing & sharing this!
There's been so much horrible news for LGBTQ+, and especially trans, people lately. Thank you for brightening my day during this very scary time. It really means a lot to know that people like you exist.
Also, just wanna add: it's really lovely to see comedy that comes from a place of genuine curiosity and compassion and exercises in empathy and reflection.
I'm literally crying right now. As a life-long 32 yr old queer Tennessean, this gesture of solidarity means so much more than I can ever express in words. Thank you.
I only hope this starts a trend that others follow to help prove how absolutely ridiculous these abusive laws actually are.
May the universe bless you with love and praise. ❤😊
Stay strong I’m sorry there are so many hateful idiots in the world.
❤
Not everyone feels the way the republicans do ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Sending mum hugs 🤗 from aus Xxx 🌈
Blessings. I'm sorry the world is so hard on you. I wish I knew you.
You made me cry today ♥️. I'm a trans woman who lives in Tennessee and you told the whole world how I feel from start to finish. Thank you Steve! Thank you so much.
Take care of yourself down there!
Cry lol, go watch some Jeffrey Marsh.
Noone and I mean not one single person should make you feel bad because you were born in the wrong body. If I can change even one person's mind I would gladly do it for you.
I’m a cis white male and was so moved by this, especially how he ended it with his heartfelt speech, that I got a lump in my throat. He described perfectly how inherent human bias works.
Hey @wrexxal, you have so many people backing you up. I'm sorry we can't all be there with you in person. So much love to you, keep your chin up. 💕
That whole thing at the end about not feeling comfortable entering either dressing room because it makes you feel uncomfortable because you fear it’ll make someone else uncomfortable is so real. As a trans person, this insight made me feel understood. It’s amazing that a cishet man really pulled through for us and the drag community. Genuinely amazing.
That was indeed impressive. I am NB myself and it is very difficult to shop for anything in the womens' department, it is just too anxiety inducing for me so I do my shopping online. I have worn a skirt in public before as I didn't change after going to a pride festival and that was very hard, but ultimately helpful. I don't think I would do it all the time but baby steps, I guess.
I admire your courage in taking a stand for the LGBTQ community. As a trans woman I know I'm taking a risk just existing where intolerance seems to be increasing daily. Hopefully with enough allies standing with us we may all live to see a better future. Thank you.
I absolutely loved what he said ending the show, truly means a lot to people in my community 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️❤️🫂
Teared up. Trans people are people.
Bigots can f*ck all the way off.
@@NathanTrail Yes they are and ty for your comment.
💯
yup!
@@ericapelz260 ty hon ❤️
"I'm also not enjoying the lack of pockets" I didn't think I could love this man more
I heard that and I knew that this man had won over half the crowd, and probably me if I wasn't already won over, with one sentence.
omg i found a dress with pockets at a thrift store today! :D
I'm mtf trans and I just wanted to say thank you for your support and walking in our proverbial shoes, even if it was just a small step it went a long way.
I truly hope that all of those transphobes watch this video to just get a little bit of empathy. THAT would be a huge change.
All that fuss for ruling the obvious club shows don't have their place in middle school? Is that really so unreasonable?
@@romeodeborneo wtf r u talking about. How is a man wearing a dress and reading Cinderella to children any different than a woman doing it
@@romeodeborneo yes it is
@@SophiaAtkinson let's get strippers to school to teach feminity awareness then
@@SophiaAtkinson perhaps you have some to say about this? ruclips.net/video/0cE7djFJ6pI/видео.html
This was a great set. I love the amount of empathy this guy has for people.
I said I was an Atheist to a male hostess at a dinner in Tennessee and he looked at me like Satan was standing before him. Can't imagine wearing a dress there. Bravo for your show of support Steve you've got big brass one's man👍🍻.
telling someone your an atheist, if done with the correct timing, does provide copious amounts of shadenfreude
Literally mans a fucking legend, not many people would have the guts to do this sort of thing, and he just did it anyways and that's just amazing, it gives me hope for the future.
Pretty sure that if Satan was real, he'd believe in the existence of God haha
@@sophiophile Believing in the existence of something does mean support or worship of that thing. Trump exists. I do not support him in any way.
@@swyllikx I'm confused. Are you saying you/someone believes in God (+ Satan, Jesus, etc) but does not worship/support him?
That is actually a position I don't think I've ever encountered. I am agnostic, but I don't think I've ever met someone who is like 'Yeah I believe that Jesus is only the way to salvation, but f that shit' hahah
Not only do you do stand up comedy Steve, you also stand up for for others and their rights, by speaking out and standing up against wrong and wrong doers. Respect, peace and love.
Dudes literally a fucking legend, like not many people would have the guts to do this, but he did it anyways and that's so fucking cool
He's a stand up guy!
does he stand up to groomers?
@@kitfisto1827 Yes. He did a whole thing about how child beauty pageants are disgusting, aka the actual groomers.
not just a stand up comedian, but a “stand up” comic ;)
On my campus they banned a student drag show that was raising funds for the trevor project. We're currently holding a massive protest this week.
Literally went shopping today with my family for a wedding, had this moment of looking in my mom's eyes for help and to be saved from the situation when I had to go in the fitting room. I've been transitioned for three years and instantly visualized this video in my head, hung my head in defeat of logic and went ahead and shopped proudly. It was good, super grateful for this performance, super grateful for the support and understanding. 🙏 Definitely helped me through worrying about what other people would think, or even worse possibly say to me, if they were to notice I'm trans. No "thing" happened. It was great and I felt pretty in the dresses. 🙏
gross
@@skinnie2838 I don't care that this was a year ago, I don't care if your entire upbringing was anti-queer, anti-trans etc. I don't care that it was just one word.
If your reaction to someone (even someone that you think is bad for whatever fucking reason) who bares their soul and describes their overcoming of anxiety and self-doubt and went out in public despite all of that is to say "gross", you have a fucking black, diseased, pus-filled soul and you should seek help for the cruel and sad life you lead.
@gracehippey5126 you're a fucking hero. ♥ ♥ ♥
As a trans woman in the United States, where one of the main political parties is actively trying to kill me, this means so much to me that my favorite stand up comedian of all time did this. Thank you so much, steve!
I wish it was possible to send a real hug through this virtual space. So much love to you 💕 Keep your chin up, you're a badass.
You people are so dramatic.
@@prototype8137 Or just paying attention.
@@prototype8137 we've moved beyond prototypes like you to actual human beings so feel free to upgrade.
@@prototype8137 "you people"? You know the only group of people who have never had to fear being assaulted, physically pr sexually, and/or killed - literally - in the US, simply for existing, are white heterosexual cis Christian males. Everyone else, at some point has been, or still is, "you people".
As a queer individual first of all thank you. Second. The realization you had trying to find a fitting room brought me to tears. Everytime I put on clothes it's something I have to think about and choose. Do I stand out and make others uncomfortable or do I make everyone else comfortable at the expense of my own happiness and sanity. I'm not here to brainwash your kids. I'm not here to shove myself in your line of site. I just want to exist and make it through life without having to constantly question every movement and action I make or take out of fear of how others perceive me and more importantly how those perceptions make people feel thus resulting in how they handle my existence.
When you started on about the last bit I knew exactly where it was going and it just brought me to tears. We are not monsters or predators. Its sickening the lies these people concoct
*"I'm not here to brainwash your kids. I'm not here to shove myself in your line of site."*
Lgbt people demand active support (not just acceptance) from everyone, everywhere, at all times. You literally have to say/do anything and everything that lgbt people tell you. If you dare to resist in any way whatsoever, they will do everything in their power to ruin your life. Oh.. and literally 100% of lgbt people who work in education actively and aggressively exploit their positions to brainwash children. They openly admit it almost every time they open their mouth. I had no problem with lgbt people before, but they've made it very clear that they're not going to leave people (or even their children) alone. If you aren't in support of this I would suggest trying to convince other lgbt people to back off, because at this point you aren't giving people any choice but to fight back.
@@uthmanibn-jafar1159 what exactly is your definition of active support? And what source told you that LGBT teachers are constantly mentioning being gay, or that mentioning being gay is brainwashing children? Why is it okay for straight teachers to mention their spouse every once and awhile, but not for gay teachers to do the same thing?
LGBT people aren’t trying to take charge over anything or anyone. They’re not some monolith who all have completely the same goal for society. They just all want to be able to do the things straight people can do and get treated the same for it. They’re not gonna ruin your life. The only time I imagine your life could be ruined from disagreeing with a gay person is if you said something incredibly homophobic and your employer ended up seeing it. There is no attack on everyone else by LGBT people. I can’t even imagine why you would feel attacked.
It's unfortunate that in only some areas of this country that's not a concern you need to have. I am one of those people, along with others who accept you for who you are and you don't make me uncomfortable. I grew up in rural Oklahoma where the sign outside town limits said *if you're black don't let the sun go down on you here* . That sign no longer exists today and one day neither will these bigotry.
Even if you WERE here to brainwash their kids it wouldn't work. We can't change who we are just because someone tells us that's not who we are. I hope you live someplace safer than Tennessee.
I literally just had to move back to my hometown in TN last month due to life circumstances, and seeing the governor sign those two pieces of legislature made my incensed, as well as making my heart sink low. Thank you for your small act of solidarity
As a trans person who’s *still* too scared and uncomfortable to go into my preferred gender’s bathrooms/changing rooms, thank you so much for doing this, things are definitely getting even scarier nowadays and it can be hard to fight back in public when you’re already tired from the last time you had to justify your existence.
You precisely described what I go through every day. I don't go to the mens room because it's scary, and I don't go to the women's room because I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable. So if a place doesn't have a unisex bathroom I actually have to leave and go somewhere else. It's incredibly depressing for me, and I thank you for expressing the difficulties we go through daily.
I am so sorry you have to deal with that. I don't know where you are from, but I would be honored to have you pee next to me any day. And will never stop fighting to normalize respect for everyone's personal gender expression.
Fuck that noise, Katy. You deserve to pee when you need to! Women's restrooms have stalls and it's nobody's business what goes on in there. From your icon you look like a lovely young woman and any woman who would give you the side eye in the restroom has her own issues. Live your best life and know this mom of a trans daughter has got your back. ♥
Katy, I’m a 24 year old cis woman, and I live in a very conservative town in Arizona. I know the hatred and bigotry that is out there in the world, and I want you to know that I’m not uncomfortable with my transgender sisters being in the bathroom with me. You are a woman, and you deserve to be in the women’s bathroom! I sincerely hope that we as a society are able to become more accepting and less hateful sooner rather than later.
When I moved to SoCal and saw gender neutral bathrooms in so many places it made me happy.
It doesn’t just help trans people but also parents with kids who are a different sex. Most fathers are uncomfortable taking their little girls into men’s restrooms and equally uncomfortable having their young daughters go into women’s restrooms unaccompanied. All parents need access to changing facilities too. Over the years I’ve seen lots of uncomfortable boys in women’s restrooms. We definitely need spaces where everyone belongs.
I also want to reiterate what the earlier poster said. I have no problem with trans women using the women’s restroom. Truth is I’m not actually going to know am I?
These stupid laws about trans people are just a way of saying if I find someone insufficiently masculine or feminine, I can be a jerk. Legalized harassment. Whatever your assumptions about another person, you really cannot know whether a person is trans or not just looking at them. And in a restroom we should all pretty much be attending to our own business anyway.
Does it make you more comfortable to know that middle school and kindergartens are been put in contact with bars and clubs shows? Is it really appropriate for you ? And should we add strippers and pole dancers or bdsm to educate these little ones ?
You are my hero. I’m a 28 year old trans guy. Bathrooms are the worst for me. I have to feel like I pass (term for being seen as your projected gender) in order to use the men’s rooms. I’m scared that I’ll upset some old lady in the woman’s room or be called out as female by a man in the men’s room. Their are some days I’ll just hold it because it’s less stressful. Thank you for what you do and say. Just thank you.
Please feel free to use the men’s room if that makes you comfortable. The unwritten rule for men using the facilities is don’t make eye contact with other men and never stare at the area between their legs. It’s not a place for interaction. I cannot remember the last time I even glimpsed a penis in a men’s room. I would guess you would just go into a stall, do your business, wash, and leave. I would like to think that your apprehension is overblown. I may be wrong but I think it is your right to live your life your way and it is not warning anyone else.
same here buddy, whichever bathroom I use people double check they're in the right place
big hugs to u. well get things changed it just takes time.
I'm a trans woman and that last part hit hard. Thank you. It's all about perspective.
Hearing how you felt going to a dressing room made me tear up, I experienced that for so many years. I had to be escorted into restrooms because I was so terrified. It was hard to find restrooms that I could feel safe in, and the ONE single-toilet restroom I found in Houston, Texas when I was visiting relatives barred me from using it. It was literally one toilet and sink in there, locks from the inside, but apparently it'd be a problem.
I order my clothes online and hope for the best. Thank you so much for doing this! I have so many ally friends, LGBTQ+ friends, and friends in the drag community. This means so much ❤
I've been to like 3 drag shows in my life and I'm still straight and male, so if you fear it's going to change you then you're probably repressing something in yourself. I had a great time and met some great people.
Here's a simple thank you for being an ally and supporting drag as well as trans people. I felt those last words you shared on stage. Love your comedy! And thank you again!
Started crying before the video even started. This is exactly what we need. I appreciate the solidarity so fucking much. And you made me laugh as I cried.
ALL DRESSES NEED POCKETS! You’ve struck a chord with every dress wearer on that one.
Moments like this are why I love Steve Hofstetter. His heckler shows are great, but his compassion is why he is able to dismantle those sad saps so easily.
That bit at the end, about not making other people feel uncomfortable... That's me. I haven't had top surgery yet but I pass well enough. I use Men's restrooms. But when I'm at the gym, I don't wear my binder in the shower or while working out. So I have to decide which locker room to use, so I use the Women's. And I've seen women walk in, see my face, and look surprised, maybe a bit uncomfortable... but then they see my tits and carry on. But men always have to worry about how they act around women and it's usually her word when something happens. And while I'm not a woman, my rack begs to differ and I can't really hide that when changing/showering. And I don't want to make another man feel like he's unsafe if I should decide to say he touched me or whatnot.
It's sad that you have to deal with that but I'm happy you are expressing who you are :D
I have nothing but support for you living the life of who you’ve probably always known you were, but I do have to disagree with the notion that the issue in your story is that you should feel sorry for men in that regard. I’m not denying your truth of that being a valid feeling that you have to put up/deal with. But I mean… All in all, by the numbers, it is much, much worse for women (cis, trans or non-binary people who are (mostly) female presenting), almost all of whom have to put up with the fear of something actually violent happening to them in a situation like that all the time. That being said, I sincerely feel for you for having bad experiences with changing rooms or restrooms on account of you not wanting to make someone uncomfortable.
@@martinlundagerpedersen4574 Thats entirely factually false. I mean, like.. Wow.
I didn't think I passed until I came out of the woman's restroom and caught the woman coming in check the bathroom sign to make sure she was going into the right bathroom. That's when I stopped using public restrooms all together unless it was a unisex bathroom. And even though the lifting world is pretty inclusive. There are shitty people in every community. That's why I'm making my own gym at home.
As a cis woman with a beard (its not lumberjack, but its a pretty thick goatee), i get those looks too. Nobody has said anything to me as of yet, though i do get called sir a lot.
I wouldnt worry too much about the lockerroom. They can mind their business. I do believe its a fear response though. Most women know almost our entire lives that some men can be dangerous. We never know who that some is.
Once they see that you are just doing your normal thing, like getting dressed or whatever and not lurking, its just a passing thought for most. I, myself would also be wary of a man in the dressing room. But no matter what you look like, we can tell a lurker from someone who is just going about their business, rack or no rack, beard or no beard.
Imo, its probably safer for you, yourself, to use the womens lockerroom.
And as a cis woman with a beard, fk em is they dont like you going in the women restroom. Im waiting for the day that some bigot approaches me. That will be one bigot who will learn their lesson to mind their own business. And one less for folks like yourself to deal with.
I will happily fight that fight, so you dont have to.
I will take them down, one bigot at a time if i have to. 👍🌈❤
Not all heroes wear capes. Sometime they wear a fetching red dress. ❤️😁😁😁😁👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
It’s really empowering to hear a cis person acknowledge the discomfort of shopping for the “wrong gender”. I’m non-binary. And I feel that whenever I want to try on a feminine article (even shirts/pants that might otherwise just seem a bit more fancy/embellished than its masc counterpart). It fades with time, especially if I’m not shopping alone. But it never goes away fully.
It makes me really heartfelt knowing there’s comedians out there willing to stand up for us.
Jokes aside, this is important. Thank you.
Thank you for being an ally in the sense of actually actively doing the right thing where and when you can, and not just claiming the title.
You are appreciated and loved, dude, and I'm glad I stumbled onto your heckling response videos back in the day.
As a straight, cis ally, I think this was both brave and groundbreaking. Steve was relatively safe because the new anti-drag law is so vague, but we need more stand-up comedians....and comediennes....to follow Steve Hoffstetter's example and help drive positive change while continuing to heal us with the powerful medicine of laughter!!
It might because I haven’t slept well but I’m tearing up watching this. (While laughing too of course.) I have family in TN and have been so sick over the news around the drag ban bill. Thank you for sticking up for our community and putting yourself out there.
It’s absurd that ANYONE would be terrified by clothing.
@Captain McBallz it's when people are corrupt or evil enough to think they are automatically entitled to what people and genitalia they want.
The fact that they might get a surprise since they care more about the genitalia than the people ... That might be part of what scares them.
Part of the problem lies with politicians' constituents. Some of them don't care much about this stuff, but they know it will poll well with their bigoted voters.
No one is it’s when you groom kids pedos
I just want to say how much I appreciate not only the single act of you wearing a dress under these circumstances, but also your acknowledgement that you're barely scratching the surface of what it means for folks who don't fit neatly into a gender binary. I'm a cis het white man, and I have a lot of blind spots to the struggles of others, so this was a good, if sad, reminder of the struggles our trans and queer friends and family go through on a daily basis. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and time, Steve.
Thank you (!!!) for commenting on dressing rooms and not wanting to make others uncomfortable! I'm trans, and have experienced exactly what you said about feeling out of place and uncomfortable in gendered settings, while also trying to not upset others. It's so hard for trans folks at times, something that cisgender folks will never know. Thank you!!!
You may not be able to change the law right now but, if you look at the comments, you did change some peoples' minds. And that's the first step. Thank you.
People like you make me feel a little safer. I don’t really know how these bills and stuff will effect me as a non-binary person but I’ve been terrified for my two best friends who are only turning 20 this year. They are beautiful women who are terrified and who have been harassed. It breaks my heart every time I talk to them and they cry and they are scared and angry. One of them keeps saying she’s going to die and I really don’t know how to comfort her sometimes. I am so angry for them. I would riot for them. It’s said as a joke but I will identify as a fucking problem for the people who mess with them. You made one of her days at work. I’ve watched you for years and this makes me feel a little bit more at peace knowing that there is support. It felt like for a while there that no one was talking about what was happening and no one cared and idk if straight peoples news needed weeks to catch up or something but I’ve been slowly seeing more and more support. I hope the world can heal and evolve.
A whole lot of us are with you! VOTE BLUE!
Sending love and compassion to you and your friends who are on the front lines of this battle every day.
btw, *if someone comments something bigoted in this thread* just report it as harrassment and continue living your unique and beautiful life
Love the "no pockets" complaint. You are amazing.
And there is absolutely no reason womens clothing can't have decent pockets.
I wear kilts. My utility kilts have freaking pockets....big ones!
@@kevinjohnston9700 clothing designers are like politicians....... there is the image of what should be, the buying/voting for the product, the reality of no change/pockets. Lol
All of my dresses have pockets. But then, I didn't buy any of them at Macy's!
@@kevinjohnston9700 the reason why is because they want to sell women purses, which are 3x the price of the pants. Create the problem, sell the solution.
As a genderfluid (under the trans umbrella), this is absolutely heartwarming. What a great way to make a statement 💜 This is the true definition of a peaceful protest.
I absolutely love it when comedians use their platform to give a message, thank you Steve!
As a trans woman in the Deep South I appreciate this so much! Thank you for standing with us in these tumultuous times.
💕❤️💕❤️❤️💕💕 You've got so many people at your back, hopefully some in person. Much love to you.
You are worthy of self-love, respect and safety. Take care
@@not_you_i_dont_even_know_you there are several that stand with me and for me. I am always appreciative of them. Only real holdout is one of my brothers. The other brother proudly claims me as a sister.
You got this girl, we cis women are right here with you.
Well… I laughed at your jokes the same way I do when you aren’t wearing a dress… You definitely make much more of a difference than you give yourself credit for! It’s such a great thing that the influence is aimed in so many good directions. You help SO MANY people!
Thank you!
This isn't performative. This isn't for show. This is a powerful statement and I'm here for it. Love love love it!
This man is actually counter culture and subversive unlike all the other “comedians” who take easy route and make fun of an already scrutinized group
Watching this, I felt like I should be offended, but I wasn't. It was all very tactfully covered and approached, and I found some segments actually funny! I think as humans we just have part of us trained to find certain things offensive as a learned behaviour, and we shut down before actually appreciating it. I'm glad I gave this a shot!
Thanks for allowing yourself the opportunity to find out for yourself😊
I'm glad you did too. I'm not sure if you are a trans person (like myself) who was getting ready to feel mocked, or a mainstream cis person getting ready to be offended by a man in a dress, but I'm glad you have the self-awareness to notice and challenge your knee-jerk reactions. If more people had that kind of insight and kindness, we could be living in a very different world. What you just did is one of the most precious things that a human is capable of.
@@nebulouskatbanter9055 I'm a trans man, and I was wholeheartedly ready for jokes that didn't land or half-researched bullshit. But this was real and made sense
Yo Steve, I'm 72 and have been watching you for about a year. I'm fairly disabled and probably will not get to a live show, Much as I would like. This dress skit tonight was a phenomenal display of solidarity and I deeply admire your strength of character and political stances. I am a str8 guy with no hangups, although the NEW pronoun thing catches me a bit off guard, hahahahaha KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK AND MAINTAIN THE GOOD FIGHT. Thank you brother :) peace
I'm not LGBTQ+, but my GF and several of my friends are. Mad respect for this one.
New sub here. I am a fierce Mama of an LGBTQ adult child. Thank you for your sensitivity and kindness. You are the sort of person I will support.
I remember my first personal experience with a transgendered person, while working as a saleswomen in a ladies boutique. I was in my late teens, about 40 years ago. She was looking at skirts and I approached and asked if she needed any help deciding on a size. She was unsure about trying on in the store but I showed her to the back and helped pick out blouses for her as she tried on the skirts. Too many people think Transgendered people are something new. A new danger for the kids. Transgendered individuals have been a part of our lives for decades.
That's kind of you. A -fun- interesting fact I recently learned was Germany had the earliest institute in 1919 studying that and sexuality, but the Nazi party burned their archives in the 1930's.
Something additionally interesting to mention when people call trans stuff 'new'.
@@TragoudistrosMPH the first sexual reassignment surgery was performed in 1930 by a German surgeon, in the Netherlands, on Lilie Elbe. Unfortunately because it was very new and risky, she passed away after one of the later surgeries. So even the surgeries aren't something new. The Dutch had been offering the surgeries from that time on. The first American, Christine Jorgensen, was a soldier who went through the surgery in Denmark in 1951. She went on to live until 1989. Unfortunately because her birth certificate said 'male' she wasn't able to marry the man she was in love with. None of this is new, it's just that the Republicans have always been and will always be, stuck in their own world and want to drag everyone into it.
@@greymomma interesting. I've never learned any of that. (Didn't learn much about the subject, since I didn't need a reason to consider defending someone else's human basic rights...if only that were universal.)
I've noticed conservatives think 'the truth is obvious', so they think it's stupid to look up what they already know...to the misery of everyone else.
@@TragoudistrosMPH that's one of my biggest complaints with the conservatives. They're willful ignorance. They constantly speak about things they haven't and have no desire to research. All the while speaking as though they're experts. I think that's why their leaders constantly talk bad about college and college degrees. They want to keep their constituents ignorant and under their control. Unfortunately so many of them are of the "The bible is all I need to know" mindset that they don't even understand that. Knowledge is power. The GOP realizes, the more people know the more power they have. But if they keep them under the idea that the bible is all they should rely on they get to control them.
@@TragoudistrosMPH I believe there was a movie made based on the life of Lili Elbe.
Thank you Steve, we need more like you in this world!
But RUclips is all about censorship. Noticed all the extra ads lately?
You better not DARE say anything about them. The google is so EVIL these days.
Agreed!! ❤️
Kept seeing this vid pop up in my feed for days. Kept scrolling on by, until I finally clicked on it. Glad I did.
You're an absolute legend. Thank you so much for standing up for me, and the trans community as a whole. You're brave as fuck, and you're a good soul. We need more badasses like you in the world ❤️
Thank you.
Also, fucking awesome dress. Elegant and a bit metal. You killed the look 🤘🖤
Your comment at the end about feeling uncomfortable looking for clothes, that really hit me. Especially as a trans woman that shit is some of the most uncomfortable and scary shit I've ever been through. There have been many times I didn't even try things on before buying. I just grabbed them hoping they would fit. Thank you for bringing this situation to light. I really hope it makes some folks think.
It sucks so much that you have to do that kind of mental math for such basic everyday experiences. Love to you as you navigate the balance between being yourself and keeping yourself safe. Just know, nothing you need to do to avoid pissing people off impacts your dignity. Like, if you decide you gotta back down to avoid been attacked or whatever, you are still valid and you haven't let yourself down. And you have people at your back, if not always in person. Love love love to you.
@@not_you_i_dont_even_know_you thank you so much. ♥️
@@mirandameyhem2724 p.s. as a queer person who crawled on hands and knees out of fundamentalist religion to save my own soul, I'm so proud of you for accepting and embracing your identity, no matter how far along in that journey you are. You're a badass.
@@not_you_i_dont_even_know_you right back at you. 🥰 Thank you for your kind words and for sharing with me.
As a non American straight guy and dad, I fully support Steve. The news coming out of the US these days is worrying and these laws are taking a step backward.
I just found my new favorite comedian. This took courage and I am so grateful for you! I wish we had more folks like you in the world! ...and also you are REALLY damn funny!
Thank you so much for supporting my brothers, sisters and myself.
I live in Memphis and this is brilliant. I support this kind of protest and we don't have to agree! I love you man! You do you ALWAYS and HUGE respect for that!
This was a great video. Thank you Steve for having the balls to put on a dress and share with us your view of the world.
You “walked a mile in their shoes” to bring awareness to the crowd but I’m really impressed with the awareness you taught yourself too. Thank you
Thank you so much for your support! Your kind words and message, it means the world to trans ppl like me and other LGBTQ+ individuals struggling in today's society. Especially living in these areas where we're being targeted relentlessly. Your kind heart is what we need more of in this world and we love having ppl like you on our side! Much love to you and thank you for everything! :)
Yup. Girls like pockets too. So glad to see you do this, Steve. I am an aging cis white lady with tons of empathy for the LGBTQ community. Their journey isn’t easy and is actually, I think, dangerous to their safety. My good friend is gay and writing a book. Semi-true, semi-fiction. And he’s letting me pre-read. One thing that immediately struck me was that there are many, many times when he/the character didn’t feel physically safe. To be accepted with no fear would be transforming for these lives. I hope that the upcoming generations will do away with the stupidity and lose the hate. Mine has done a pretty shitty job.
Thank you, Steve. A little bit of support goes a long way. You rock 🤘🏼
As a long time fan of yours and a trans woman I absolutely love how you ended this video ❤️🌈🏳️⚧️
But RUclips is all about censorship. Noticed all the extra ads lately?
You better not DARE say anything about them. The google is so EVIL these days.
Right
Lolz
Thank you so much for doing this. It means so much to so many people. Hopefully if enough people do things like this, the message will get across that the laws they've passed in my home state are stupid.
Like which ones?
Man… I used to watch some of your old heckler videos and loved them, i stopped for whatever reason but I come here and damn… the way you explained the issues with this in a way that is digestible to people who don’t fully grasp the situation was astounding. I just have to thank you, knowing there are people like you and all these others in the comments makes me think the world might not go to complete shit, you are a genuine inspiration and I hope one day I can touch people’s hearts and truly make the world better like you have.
@stevehofstetter, your closing statement about buying a dress really hit me in the feels so hard and cried!! Because I’ve been doing it my whole life since I was a child. Always in the constant of fear. 😭😭
Thank you very much for sharing our experiences through yours! ❤❤
*That part at the end, about how it felt to buy the dress and try it on, made me understand something that never even clicked in my brain.*
Actually made my eyes water-up just a little. iThink we need more people expressing how these simple day to day parts of living, become emotionally charged events that can be soul-crushing, when these laws and attacks are made on LGBTQ+ people. Good on ya, mate. Well done!
Goddamn, Mr. Hofstetter. Was not expecting to cry at a comedy show. Well said.
You go, Gurl! Change happens one person at a time. I bet you brought thousands along with you!
Probably the most significant comedy act since Chaplin. Thank you. Just simply thank you for being you. Never stop fighting the good fight.
Steve. You. Rock.
As a person who was born intersex and who took nearly three decades to figure out what that meant for me and how it interacts with my gender identity, and who is still, nearly four decades into my life, struggling to get my body to conform to my gender identity, I very much appreciate the solidarity shown here. I also appreciate the way you ended the piece, speaking about your experience in buying the dress. I'm luckily well beyond the point where I care if I make other people uncomfortable any longer, at least as far as my body is concerned. I'm honestly not sure if I ever did care, but there was at least a time that I did try to conform to social norms and expectations. I don't do that any longer. Life's too short. It's my body, I don't expose myself. That's the most concession they get at this point.
no idea who this comedian but all i know is i respect the hell out of him for this!!
I'm transfem myself and have always loved Steve's standup, but this means so much. I was attacked just last month in New York and I've just recovered from the concussion, bruises, and cuts. PTSD from that last attack and unfortunately another may be what keeps me up at night, but what bothers me most days is more so the constant hate, alienation, and oppression thrown at our trans and nonbinary communities. I'm left with scars from some physical manifestations of hate, but nobody should think that anti-trans laws are any less harmful. Opposing bigoted laws like this wonderful man went out of his way to publicly do saves lives of people all around you even if you might not realize it. Contact your politicians and let them know you don't support that kind of hate.
I'm so sorry you went through this( Hope everyone will mobilize against this hate and show support now, when it's most needed
This was so, SO nice to see. Especially the part at the end. Thank you for speaking the truth and using your platform to support our community
Honestly I wish the real men in Tennessee would ALL wear a dress just for one day just walk around and live your lives in a cute dress for just one day
Damn it Steve... ya got me 😫🥹😭🫶 SO proud of you and what ya stand for! Moved to tears!
Being from Chattanooga, I was a little nervous to see the video and the crowds reaction when you said you were doing the show in a dress, but y’all made me proud 😊 I imagine if there was heckling about it, you would’ve included that so I’m glad everyone was supportive! wish I could’ve made it to the show, looks like it was great
As a former Tennessean, I appreciate this 100%. I live in Colorado now and I will never return TN, not even to visit. It's waaaay too oppressive now.
I'm super proud to call myself a fan and I hope to one day be able to do something as genuine as this. Definitely gave this video a like. Anything to help spread the word and show support.
Very kind words 💯
Share the video with friends, family, etc.
@@tootselee3097 Already being done ❤️
Love you for this. Let's keep standing up for all human beings.
Steve, I came out as transgender a little over a year ago. The first few times I bought clothes I was still in the closet. I would go with my wife and we would pretend we were shopping for her. I moved because I was in the south and didn't feel safe being trans where I was before.
Also I am with you on the lack of pockets.
Thank you for being an ally!
Hi y’all! I’m trans and this was awesome! Thank you for bringing these issues to light. As a trans women can you imagine me in the men’s room? I’m 5,5 125lbs and my body is developed since I was 16. My breast is 34dd, 25 waist and 37 hips. Since I’m a man maybe I should take my shirt off at the beach. Just let them breath! Ill be honest wives, your husband is going to checking me out and other girls. PS a lot of straight men love trans women. Especially married men. Ask any person from the lgbtqia community. This should be fun!
Hey, trans women are hot.
😂 this reminds me of a Reddit story where someone had crazy asshole neighbors so they started jogging around the neighborhood topless just to piss off the crazy neighbor. I'm not sure but I think they were some crazy religious people or something.
@@nitroustommy3668 wish I saw the vid! I’m just being honest. Thanks for sharing!