I think its not just hate for women who are single its more so hate for women who LIKE being single . As if being happy with your life is an insult to anyone living differently.
That part! They act like women are evil for not desiring partnership or can live happily without it. I think the reason is because they can’t dangle it in front of these women because it holds very little value to them.
They will criticize every aspect of a woman claiming she can't get a man then get triggered when she says she doesn't want one. The jokes are astronomical 😂
In the end men are terrified of not being wanted by women. So if a woman says she's single, not mingling and happy about it. It feels like a personal rejection of him. So he needs to find a flaw in her to soothe his ego and reaffirm his self-worth.
...especially when the girl in the video is attractive. If she was unattractive, he wouldn't have cared, he wouldn't have made a video bullying her. * i have not watched his video, and i won't. *
These men also shame you for being a single mother if she “chose wrong”. They’re also voting to eliminate welfare or daycare aid. They hate you for either choice. When I think of this…their opinion means less than nothing.
Exactly. They say motherhood is the best thing a woman can accomplish in her life BUT they will rain down HATE on women who are single mothers. Make it make sense.
Right and when women want a man that’s just faithful and considerate they label her as stuck up and that her standards are too high. Damned if we do damned if we don’t
You're so right! The goalpost is constantly moving because the bottom line is they just hate women. Nothing we ever do will be right for some folks, so we might as well live as we see fit.
If men cannot threaten or scare women with the 'spinster' label it means they have to be likeable. Far too many men have skated by on women's desperation. Many men don't want to work on themselves or be likeable so they lash out in anger as more women find solace and peace in being alone.
And by being alone and single, you mean getting run trough by every other guy on dating apps. Go confuse others, men pity single women, because they have been sold a lie. lol
Definitely agree with this. That’s why you see all these anti marriage Mgtow types so angry and resentful towards single women but especially older single women. If they really did not want relationships and wanted to get away from us they’d be happy that women are opting out and would try to encourage it, not try to convince and shame them they’ll be lonely or a cat lady
Someone on the Internet called me "self centered" because I referred to men as being decentered. He went nuts and told me that I was de-centered also and no one would want me. It was so odd 😂😂😂
This content creator also failed to mention that some women did choose to be single, and only focuses on those that couldn't find partners. She even says that she " understands" what those men attacking single women are trying to say. She did miss the point unfortunately on this topic.
I'm 47. Comfortable financially and my only child is an adult. I love my life and sometimes I wonder why I spent so much time wanting to be partnered. I absolutely love it here. Luxury vacations, sleeping in, spending selfishly on myself, dating when I want too.. It's so peaceful.
Wow I love that. Am a widow for 10yrs now n never remarried.i have twin teens and am looking forward to such freedom inthe near future. Enjoy and God bless you.
Choosing to be childless is a choice, up until a woman reaches age 37. By that point, mother nature makes the choice for her, and removes motherhood as an option. Singleness is a choice, but as a woman moves away from the last year of her prime child-bearing years which is age 27, Father time via his cruel cousin gravity, makes dating problematic because the men that women deem the most desirable are not checking for women who are past their prime child-bearing years... i.e. Lolo Jones and Eboni Williams. Who is going to be a woman's caretaker as her mental acuity and physical health begins to decline when she is post menopausal. Typically, that would be her spouse or children, but what are Single/childless women in their 60s going to do when their minds start to go and their bodies start breaking down?
@@amari7003 I worked in the retirement and life/health insurance industry for 10yrs... No one ever plans on physically or mentally regressing. But for many women who are post menopausal, it happens. Choosing to be single and childless is a choice rooted in making a permanent decision based on a temporary situation. You are not always going to be as sharp and as spry as you are in your 20s and 30s. The points I raised are very real and valid. Our society is not designed to deal with large numbers of single childless women who reach their golden year and have no clear plans as to who will be their future caretakers. Society is far tougher on men than it ever has been on women. If men make poor life choices that lead to poverty and destitution, they face homelessness. However, women can escape homelessness by simply getting pregnant, in which case, an entire network of social welfare safety net programs will conspire to save her from her poor life choices via section 8 housing assistance, food stamps, cash assistance... etc. Men are accountable and accustom to dealing with this reality which is why 75-95% (the number fluctuate depending upon the homelessness study you read) of all homeless are men. I'm not concerned about your fathers situation. He made his bed and he'll suffer the consequences, like all men in general. My responses are not meant to pressure women into being wives or push out unwanted children. It's meant to get young women thinking about legitimate end of life scenarios that they are likely to encounter. Pepole in their young years are not serously thinking about retirement. I worked in the retirement sector. I can assure you, I rarely received any inquiries from people below age 50 regarding their retirement benefit projections. Frankly, most of us don't even seriously look at our 401k projections until we are in our mid 40s. You assume that women already have plans for their old age and golden years, I know for a fact, that they are not fully aware of the ramifications. Relying on the community to pull together and look after you when you decline is frankly, wishful thinking and unreliable.
@@dkt4377 WHAT YOU SAID DOSEN'T APPLY TO ALL WOMEN....LOTS A WOMEN HAVE KIDS IN THE 40/50S AND STILL HAPPY AND PLENTY OF 50 YR OLDS STILL LOOK LIKE THIER IN THIER 20S......
Speaking as a 51-year-old woman who was raised in a conservative Christian household and environment? Conservative and religious men often bristle at a woman who enjoys leisure. For some men, this is conscious. For some it is unconscious. But I saw this growing up, and I see it now. Conservative and religious men often believe that every waking moment of a woman's life must be productive or profitable for a man. Even if a woman is spending a lot of her time caring for children, a lot of conservative or religious men experience that as a woman being productive and profitable for them. Either because she is rearing and educating his legacy, so to speak, or she is providing him all the leisure he desires by relieving him of child care and domestic labor. If you look at the tweets regarding this woman's TikTok, you will actually see men upset because women want more leisure.
It's honestly scary how angry and violent I've seen conservative men get over funny short videos from single, childless women. Even some conservative women on RUclips get really hostile over the idea of women out there who aren't making marriage or children their top priority, nevermind a priority.
I’m conservative, and would never think that way. Most conservatives would never have hatred for single women, but the internet bring about the crazies.
It’s not a conservative vs liberal thing it’s all men of all backgrounds. Y’all have to get out of the group mentality. All of these entities are 2 sides of the same coin
I'm 37, single, childfree, and I spend my free time exercising, relaxing, and buying myself as many pairs of shoes as I want. I am so miserable and so sad that you hate me. LOL!!!!!
You forgot to mention what else yo do in your free time, don't confuse others with words like "single".. It stil means that you are getting ran trough every night. We don't hate you, we pity such people. You have been sold a lie..
LOVE this topic. The internet HATES a confidant, single young woman who does not succumb to pressures of patriarchy. Sexism only believes a woman exists to have children, so a woman who is outside of that is a threat to misogyny which is why Matt Walsh got BIG MAD🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
The internet are the same ones to says dont need men, but cry for help when there is danger and then go to the internet to say that men are not taking care of women.
@@dunemae and who says that they don’t need men? The same independent women. The danger can be anyone man or woman. Yall constantly talk about how women can do whatever by themselves and I say cool. Whatever happens I trust you can handle it by yourself.
If women, en masse, choose to be single and childless, who is going to be their caretakers when they reach their postmenopausal golden years of retirement age and their mental acuity and physical health begins to decline? Typically, that would be her spouse and/or children, but a single childless women would have neither?
@@roshellegouldbourne787 Passport bros are winning. West women are complaining about them. They are successfully seeking out the relationship outcomes that they want.
@@dkt4377if you have to go to a different country to date, something is very wrong with you or you have a selfish MOTIVE. Of course this will be overlooked. They are targeting certain countries for a reason, wake up!
The older generations messed up the world for their children. The state of the world and economy is not screaming "let's get together and build a family" it's very much "how do I survive another day" for far too many people. There is hardly any emphasis on community building, it's very much everyone has to look out for themselves and survive somehow. Thinking about supporting children is just...unimaginable to me at this point lol.
I tend to not believe in those things... Oh be green, don't eat meat, don't have kids, don't laugh or breath, our planet wil die... If it seems unimaginable to take care of children, it''s because we have been conditioned to believe so, in a society where things are deliberately made more difficult to maintain.
@@vaastafraja5685It's not so much our planet will die but am I cool with my offspring living in a Mad Max scenario. It's the middle of September and it's still in the 90s and I lived here all my life. We should be in the mid 70s by now
@@vaastafraja5685 I didn't mean from a "the planet will die if you have children and eat beef" kind of way, moreso supporting myself is hard enough - I can't imagine being in a "traditional" family where I do what my dad did - which is support a family with one salary, while paying off students loans and paying a mortgage.
I agree with you. It is also obvious that times have shifted. As time passes each generation is a bit different. I personally respect anyone who knows themselves where they are in life. Sometimes singlehood is a choice and that is fine. Singlehood doesn’t have much to do with your community. Some people are not dating intentionally or are taking a break intentionally.
I will probably never be able to afford children, soo…and with eminent environmental disaster and economic collapse, it seems unethical to bring them into this mess, unless perhaps you happen to be rich.
She never spoke out against marriage though. It's a fact: not having children means you can be more carefree. This was triggering to some. The people angry at her are giving: -we regret the lifestyle we chose -we regret having kids -we wish we were free and are jealous -how dare a single woman have life so (seemingly) easy
If hearing about someone's experiences causes you to feel upset or agitated, it may be worth considering the underlying issue. Perceiving it as a personal attack on your way of life could suggest a need for assistance or support.
I'll admit that I did find the video somewhat cringe, not due to this woman being single and enjoying it, but it comes across (to me) like a brag and an underhanded dig at women with children. My question is who her intended audience is. I don't give af about men and their reaction, but if it's a dig at married mother's (for which I am one), then there's a problem because I'm not about pissing on other women to make yourself feel superior.
I don’t think people dislike single women with no children content creators. I think folks hate the assumptions that some of those creators make about married women and mothers. Let these creators tell it, they are the only ones that have free will and living their best lives. The rest of us are slaves to patriarchy. I have single friends never married with no children. I also have divorced friends some with kids and some with no children. My friends often tell me that I have the best life. Married many years with no children but lots of nieces and nephews. I don’t feel the need to make any comparisons. Partnered or not, children or children or not. I want women to have an abundance of joy in their lives.
@@BlackTalkNoLimits nah dudes definitely hate single women creators. She's mostly being chastised by men not women. I mean Matt walsh doesn't even take care of his own kids. He was the one bragging that his wife does everything at home.
@DeeperThanMyThoughts She didn't piss on married mothers at all. She simply talked about her day. You're projecting. Your life is obviously not what you thought it would be. Work on yourself.
This conversation is long overdue, people DO NO LIKE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN WITH AUTONOMY, it threatens the status quo. And if you’re a black woman, they hate you more for it, ladies, stay feminine, stay protected, keep your money up, and live your life to the absolute fullest because what I know is that these people who are hating on black women in particular, would trade their miserable lives in seconds for yours🙏🏾 People don’t want to admit that black women are everything they wish they could be🙏🏾, that is why the hate is so strong and so vitriol. Please women wake up, because if someone is fighting this hard, that means that they have something to lose, meaning that you have more value than you ever dreamed of m, you just need to realize it 🙏🏾
So, if a woman chooses to be single and childless... who is going to be her caretaker when her mental acuity and physical health begins to decline? Most women, particularly blk women, don't make enough money to live comfortably in retirement. They typically rely on inheriting their spouses retirement benefits and social security... I don't think social security will be their for anyone born after 1997.
More than half way through and I resonate with this so fully. Everyone screams “it takes a village” to raise children/ care for elders, but forget that single/child free people (especially women) are integral to the village. Shaming them makes no sense!
That part! People will hit up the auntie with no kids for money and babysitting, but often they don't stop to think that the reason she's available to and has resources to help the parents in her orbit is because she doesn't have her own children. Often these women are the ones picking up the slack when the "partner" isn't handling business.
@@vaastafraja5685not sure how you got from point a to b on this one. A lot of single childless people look after kids? I certainly didn't have kids when I was babysitting as a teen 😂
@@emily_8687 You said teen, she said women. A big difference. I have met single women in their 40's.. They are bitter, i wouldn't even wanna want her to touch my child.
They think we can magically make a whole healthy, financially, mentally, spiritually, monogamous man with a career appear. People don’t realize how difficult this is.
I think the point also is…. SOME WOMEN JUST DONT CARE TO ENTERTAIN MEN. Unless they want to. When they want to. Even if they are all those things. Men take work. Women are just simply choosing themselves
@@dkt4377For many it's a long term status, and no shame, coercion or manipulation from society will change that. These women will keep being single happy and free while the loser incels haters keep hating.
@@diamondheart11 there are consequences and tradeoffs for every life choice made. When survival mode happens, I pray these single women don't find themselves wishing they had a man.
The delusion i see here, using a false term like "single" probably only means that you still getting ran trough every night to satisfy yourself. Stop confusing yourself lol.
What I don't get is why they singled her out. She made it clear she wants to be married and she wants to have kids. Why are they mad? She drank the kool-aid and they are complaining she's not dying fast enough. She has no control over that part!
I think their mad that their women aren’t having children fast enough or is purely Caucasian anymore so they are on a mission to ban things like safe abortions , pills and I heard condoms which that one is stupid because a lot of people use condoms
Most likely because she comes across as content. Which drives unhappy people wild. Especially if they know their unhappiness (discontent) stems from mainlining the Kool Aid.
Women without kids are expected to take criticism with that choice with a smile, but people who decide to have kids refuse to consider any of the downsides and take it as a personal attack when people mention it online.
I love my daughter with all my heart best thing ever but there is a reason why I only have one😭😭😭. I wish people took it more seriously so we wouldn't have so many broken people running. Starting a family shouldn't be something society guilts into but rather something comes along once one has a solid foundation and dealt with any underlying emotional and mental things that could hinder the success development of a child. You don't have to be rich but stable
@@vaastafraja5685 Hey just responding to the original poster. So she was mentioning about the potential downsides. People make it seem like because society told them they should have children or because I am a girl or women I want children, then it will be puppy hugs and rainbows.
Anytime someone describes their life as nicer or less stressful than people with kids, you can bet they’ve heard 10 times that many comments on how they’re sad, lonely, desperate, bitter, man-hating, blasphemous, egotistical, you name it woman for not having kids. Eeeeeeveryone, apparently 😤 is allowed to have a comment or opinion on single, childless women, but you are instantly hated on if you dare to question or comment on married people or those with kids. It’s just one part of the double standard against single childless women.
Im single and childfree. I choose both. I never wanted children and im happy at nearly 40 that I wont ever have children. I never saw myself giving my freedom, life, body and health up for a child. Im also single because I choose. Its so much more peaceful being single than being in a relationship that I see so many women in relatisonhips who are depressed because they basically serve their unappreciative men like they are just bangmaids and not partners.
I’m about half your age but I love hearing about happily single older women. People always try and sway younger women to change our minds but stories like this warm my heart ♥️
After a certain age, for women, singleness is no longer a choice, but a status they are resigned to. The men that most women want are not checking for women who are well past their prime childbearing years. What is more fulfilling? To be a woman at age 90+, sitting at a diner table at Christmas time with 60 pairs of eyes looking back at you that exist because you are their mother, grandmother, or great grands. OR is being 90+ with a bunch of employee of the week/month certificates from employers that replaced you as soon as you retired? You are making a judgment about marriage/motherhood only by pointing out the bad.... the benefits far exceed the cost.
@dkt4377 You're idealising the concept of family and specially motherhood. Also, to have those "60 eyes looking at you" you'd have to have like 10 children, and each of those children should have partners and 4 children of their own. Family is not only getting together on special ocassions, it involves a lot of sacrifices that some people don't find worth the reward. You're also assuming that singleness equals a lesser rewarding life, and that's not it. Being single means you can invest time on other things, whether is your professional life, your hobbies or engaging with people who are not related to you by blood. Those relationships can be rich and fulfilling too, they can give your life meaning and substance. Motherhood makes a lot of women miserable, not because it's bad but because they were forced into it.
@@jaouna My grandmother who passed over the weekend had 11 children. She was 93 and there are over 70 of us who are thankful for the life she had. I doubt we will dwell on her hobbies or her jobs during her funeral. We will all focus on the positive way she added to our lives. As you age, your circle gets smaller. Yes, I have friends, but once they married and started their families, my contact with them became less and less. Ask the feminist from the 1970s who chose singleness... the spinster cat lady is not an appealing way to go. Singleness is a season in life... it was never meant to be a permanent status. Don't complain, when you reach retirement age and you are alone, no children to visit, or a husband to comfort you.
She wasn't even unreasonable with what she said. She even said that you could do all those things while being married and having kids plus she said it was like an affirmation to help her feel grateful and joyful for her current situation of being childless and not married... The people who responded harshly towards her were being way too dramatic and sensitive, focused on what another GROWN ADULT is doing with their life 🙄🙄🙄
single, childfree, 100% debt free with savings, and living my best life which wouldn't be possible if i had to waste my time on kids. i'm glad more people are speaking up because relationships, marriage, children, whatever ISN'T for everyone and some people would benefit from only focusing on themselves tbh
Men can accept and adore a young unmarried childless woman if she’s a fictional character like Wonder Woman or Captain Marvel. Yet, a real woman living her best carefree life disturbs their peace and sanity🙄
@@Madamchiefyes captain marvel is a woman 😂 unless you are getting confused with captain America lol. And yes to your 2bd question about the male gaze. Men did create these woman characters characters. Look up some comic book pictures of Wonder Woman and she-hulk online. They didn’t dress them like that for nothing.
Imagine people triggered what someone is doing on Saturday? Those haters are everywhere. I'm 36 child free woman myself, and I don't post anything to the internet. And the only times I took pictures I just share it with family and friends.
@@vaastafraja5685 if you are unable to build connection to anyone who isn't either a person you have seggs with, or your genetic offspring, that is your problem. Most people can. needless to say, 36 is a very young age. I am 29 and still live my life not very different from how I lived in my 20, just a job instead of studying. Again, if you feel old at 36, that is your problem.
I also think people ignore how many people actually settle. I was engaged a few times but did not take the leap because I knew I would be settling. I would love to be married, but I don’t want to get married just to say “ I’m married”. I really want a partner. That’s not easy to find.
They know. Some are triggered because they felt the pressure to settle and it's pretty awful for them now. So seeing someone who's not settling and enjoying their life without feeling pressured to choose any man that comes their way infuriates them.
A man can defer marriage or children well into his 40s and still have a chance of finding a wife... particularly if he has access to fame and resources (Al Pacino is approaching 85yrs old, he has a baby mama who is in her 20s).
@@elenawalker517 they really don’t get it. Women are enjoying their California King beds ALONE! Waking up free with no headaches of who needs what and why. Except themselves. It’s very triggering to them . Oh well 🌸🌺🌼
Thank you for this video! It is very true. People look at single woman as though we've made the choice not to partner. When in reality for a lot of women, there weren't any viable options in her vicinity or men who may want short-term versus long-term mating. Also, you introduced a new coined term, "social infertility".
I'm writing this comment before I watch the video or read any of the comments. A few weeks ago I was talking with a friend and she said 'do you realise that there is always something to do in the house?' I responded ' Not in my house. That is because you have children and a man that lives with you.' I think the concern is that if this idea really takes off then men will be getting much less sex. The women will be having less children thus providing less slaves..I mean less workforce.
we know what you mean and you're right. Forced free labour is the definition of slavery and if you have to do it because you're expected to without compensation...
It's hate for all women. They just hate hate hate. They will pick something/anything To tear a woman down. She can be married. I'm a married stay at home mom and a man called me a legal prostitute 😂. Single moms get hate, Single women get hate, only fan girls get hate etc. The only thing women can do is live your life how you want too, and other women should be supportive.
Women who are single as they get older, it’s because they are usually educated or have better jobs. It enables them to not have to put up with bad behavior from their partners and they can leave. Even if children are involved. They don’t have to stay in a relationship that doesn’t make them happy or that they are abused in because they feel they can’t make it on their own. I encourage all women to get educated and maintain employment when married or in a long term relationship so that you don’t feel trapped and can leave when a relationship turns bad or unhappy. Men are now aware of this and are angry about it. They don’t have money control over women anymore.
Nailed it!! You should look up PEW research. It shows that women who are working class (highschool educated or less) are less likely to get married in the first place, more likely to get divorced, but less likely to file for divorce. while college educated women are: more likely to get married, more likely to stay married longer, less likely to get divorced but are more likely to file for divorce. Lets repeat this: Working class, ie poorer, women are LESS likely to get married, MORE likely to get divorced, have SHORTER marriages, but are LESS likely to file for divorce. Hmm -- what could be the underlying cause of this? Its M N Divorce is a privilege. And the women with options are the ones who have access to higher-quality marital prospects, and dont have to tolerate a lot of behaviors. While poorer women are less likely to file for divorce, because they are more desperate to hang on. But more likely to end up divorced anyway. reality.
I was married for a long time. I gave birth to two humans who are now adults. I have actively discouraged both of my children from marrying and parenting. I've no idea if either of them will do these things at some point in their lives. Having found my own life to be fuller, more meaningful, more joyful, and just plain fabulous when not partnered with a human male or raising children, I encourage everyone to consider this in their own lives. I adore my children and they have been quite spoiled by me over the course of their lives. I am glad that they are here and I enjoy watching them map out their lives. I believe that the people who get offended by single, child-free women think that they deserve something special for having married and parented. You don't get cookies for this, and I do not believe that anyone should be lauded for it, either. As science continues to show us, women are better off without males in romantic relationships because there are so few of them who do any internal work that it's much too difficult to find one worth having around. I have yet to miss any of the men from my past. I have never felt lonely and I am quite happy with my cats. I proudly discuss them whenever I get the chance. I'll never have a dog because that's too much like having a human child. Been there. Done that. No thank you for another helping. I'd like for us to leave women alone, especially single, child-free women. For those who have chosen to not marry or parent, let them live in peace. Their choices aren't harming anyone and if something thinks that it is, the problem is with THEM.
@@BoahemaaGreat point! Never before in history have women been in charge of their reproduction to the degree they now are. I don’t think things are ever going back to the way they were.
I had been single for a long time. It came to a point that I really felt satisfied with my life. I was and still at peace with my life. I could take time with my skincare routine and watching series. I am happy that more women are becoming more happy with being single. Why does having a cat an insult??????? Cats are precious creatures.
I mean its been the status quo of the world for ever. Fairytales have a childless/single woman who is the villain (witch). Roald Dahl has a book that says not liking children and being bald makes you a witch. If people mock parents its a backlash to the loud proclamation that childless people are not living fulfilled lives.
After suffering consequences of being a tradcon pick me, I have now embrace being single and childfree. (I literally escaped living with an abusive alcoholic ex-marine and started over by living in my car over living with him or any man again. Took several months to get back in my feet and back living comfortably again.) I feel more at peace, free, and know that the best person to take care of the old me is the YOUNG ME by wisely investing for my own wealth and taking care of my own health! It's fun to be a happy hobbyist tackling my bucket list, becoming a polyglot, traveling, baking, painting, and just doing whatever I want whenever I want-especially without the constant fear and anxiety I used to feel.
We don't talk enough about the joys of leisure, especially as an adult. So it's great to see you mention all the things you do to fill your time that isn't focused on just work or being of service to other people at all times.
Somehow i don't believe these stories. Men being abusive is something from the 70's, before the sexual revolution and before the times when women gained their rite vote. Don't know a single guy who has admitted to me being abusive. Nowadays it just feels like that the word abusiveness is used as weapon to justify divorce. I have been trough this myself, have been called abusive after just having and opinion about certain matter. You sure you just wasn't happy with him? And wanted to get single again. Just so you could live your life on your own terms without society judging you what you actually secretly wanted and did?
@@SISTAGURL I have been actually, the actually numbers and statistics don't match up. Tables have turned along time ago. Most if not all of the cases filed are being used as a weapon. We have seen this with Amber heard using her position to destroy Johhny dep. Danny Masterson just got jailed for 30 years for what i refuse to believe he did. And honestly i don't believe that the justice system in the US does any good to good honest men.
Marriage was never a goal for me or having kids. I am going on 4 years single, I live alone in a beautiful apartment and I'm not in any rush to be in a relationship. If it happens, cool, if it doesn't I could careless. I don't foresee myself having children either🙂
I’m 29 with no children. I just got my BA and I currently live with my bf who is supporting me while I hunt for a job. Life is good and easy. When I think of children I get anxiety. His sister is my age, married with two kids, and looks exhausted. Also, my sister is married and is near my age with two children. She too looks exhausted. My bf and I talk marriage and children and we both aren’t ready yet. Just living life at the moment. I should also note, I am black and my bf is white. He has an amazing career and working towards starting his own business. Our families are merged and I know all of his friends and his friends wives + children. Fun fact, my bf is younger than me. Only by a year though. Social media is a joke. Everyone is online spewing garbage about what they think… I seriously laugh at some of the conversations people are having. I separate social media and reality. They are not the same. Something interesting, most of our friends are married or in relationships but we also have single friends and enjoy their company too. Social media makes things complicated that do not need to be. There’s nothing wrong with being single. It’s a time where both women and men get to learn themselves.
People have a problem when one lifestyle is deemed inferior to the other. I'm married with children and I dont think my lifestlye choice is better than a single persons life. I understand that both have purpose and people simply have different walks. Putting someone down for walking their walk indictes you feel you are on the wrong path.
Putting someone down for walking their walk indictes you feel you are on the wrong path.................WOW........PREACH!!!!!.............I LOVE THESE WORDS!!!!!
It's unfortunate because it's not just on the internet. It's in real life too. I cannot walk down the street or on an exercise trail without being harassed or verbally assaulted by men in my community because I'm "attractive" and out by myself or without a man essentially. What century are we in?!
It’s jealousy of those single. Singleness has tons of advantages. Whereas being in relationships creates a lot of burdensome baggage and disadvantages. I like my freedom, peace and space. Doing what I want when I want without having to clean up after someone else
When he’s not working (if he even has a job) men (married or single) spend their days with p04n and video games yet it’s a problem when a single woman decides to go to concerts and watch tv? These dudes are something else.
You are probably the most unbiased person on this entire platform. You analyze data in such a fair and clear way. We can all learn something from your style of reporting!
Steph what you said at 12:37 about the reaction and the "why" I think is so interesting!! There's a lot of offense on the conservative side of the spectrum when young women (especially religious women or women who are devout in their faith) decide to focus on their careers for a period of time, or decide to stop pressuring themselves into marriage. And it very well could be because those are the types of women the conservative men want to marry, so they worry their dating pool is shrinking- if not for themselves then for their friends. Great video, as always!
Also historically, white women have always voted the same way as their husbands. So his vote counts as two! As white women stay unmarried, his vote is only ONE. Now I can’t say this for other races and politics.
Oh my gosh I just heard a term that was quite accurate as to what I am certain other women have seen as well, "Nanny McBangmaid" and its so awful for women who experience this, but man so accurate of how many males view us, especially Black women. Sad & disheartening.
I think men life Matt Walsh just got married and had kids because it gives them status in their community. They never wanted to do it and let’s be honest, it’s not difficult to get married and have kids, having a happy marriage and raising good kids is difficult of course, but walking down the aisle and not wearing a condom isn’t hard. For most people that is the height of their accomplishments in life so they get defensive when they see others who don’t conform. Anyone who is happy in a marriage and family doesn’t lash out at others.
But Matt Walsh has accomplished a lot, probably more than you, and he still values marriage. I don't understand how you can belittle marriage and him, while he's done both and it sounds like you haven't. I am not a Matt Walsh fan at all btw, but a successful writer, podcaster, and cultural influencer over the Duchess of Success makes sense, right?
Why are the men already here complaining about how hard it is for them to date and how they hate seeing privileged people complain😂 She wasn't even condescending enough for people to get so upset. She even said she'd been hard on herself.
If my husband were to be hit by a bus or something there is no way I would ever date again. Guys have gotten absolutely vile since I was on the market. I do not blame younger women for steering clear.
Matt went off because she's a conventionally attractive blonde white woman. If she was black saying the same no one would say anything. I'm saying this as single (not by choice) conservative minority woman.
Exactly. I have to remind myself that they're not talking to ME. They ain't talkin to you, her, her. None of us 😎 We aren't being stalked or kidnapped either. Let them do them.
Exactly. And you can tell that she’s also upset by her current single status because she’s an attractive, blonde, white woman. Society says she’s not supposed to be single still at her age and you can tell she believes in that narrative, too.
I’m in my twenties and I personally want to eventually have marriage and children but not just for the sake of being in one. Both of them are lifetime commitments especially children and with the cost of living among being emotionally and mentally available to bring someone into the world and nurture and guide them is a deal of responsibility and patience. I don’t blame some people for not wanting to have them bc of that and also just bc of messed up this society, having those things doesn’t necessarily equate to happiness. There are married people who hate each other and people that resent their own children(some in my own family).
Years back, I read a book on authoritarian personalities by Dr. Robert Altmeyer, and it really helped me understand why people feel threatened by those who are different from themselves. It's a major issue in our society today.
It’s crazy bc the internet really is like “HOW DARE YOU BE HAPPY WHILE SINGLE AND WITHOUT CHILD!!!” Lmfaooo like what the hell, so sorry that women can have more purpose to their life than having their primary focus be pleasing a man and bearing someone’s child. The other thing I hate about the “lonely” comments are that, are we forgetting many people in relationships are STILL lonely (but that’s socially acceptable loneliness??)? And they act like single people don’t have family and friends who love and care about them as well. Someone who had a husband who passed away could be “70 and lonely”, is that not the same?? Lmao It truly comical, and comes off as jealousy of single childless people at this point, and that’s speaking as someone who isn’t even in this boat. smh Lmfao
Would they be so upset if that woman wasn't "pretty"/ their type. I don't think so. I feel like a lot of men are upset because they see a woman who is rejecting them, and a waste of good jeans pants' by her not having kdz. That's my take.
I am single mom BUT, I am not the primary parent of my one child. I chose to get married, have a kid, and get divorced; I didn't chose to to be the vacation parent though. My ex fought me for primary residency because he thought it would force me to not move out of state, it didn't. So for 16 years I have lived almost like a single child-free woman because I have a LOT of time without my child physically with me. I have built a life filled with hobbies and little trips, going to concerts, nurturing my two long-time friendships, etc. As my daughter has gotten older, I've been able to include her more in these things, and she's become very comfortable and appreciative of all the space and freedom she has when she's with me - and the ex has been mad ever since. He's gotten married twice more after me and had more children, all the while attempting to shame me over not being a "real mom" and not helping him enough. He means with money but our parenting plan is VERY detailed and clear on who pays for what, and my daughter is also old enough for me to give money directly to her now. Nevertheless, I did not choose to live primarily without my child and it sucks. At the same time, what am I supposed to do? Cry everyday about it? Not spend that time developing myself, not only to be a happy person but to be a quality mother that my daughter can learn from? So, yeah, I enjoyed all this free time I've had even though I wanted something different. It has still been a happy life and as my daughter enters adulthood, there will be a new chapter for us to be together the way we weren't before. My ex still calls me "selfish" but I don't care. To expect the single and child-free, whether by choice or circumstance, to not still live happily is weird and those people should really unpack that.
I love that you weren't the primary caregiver - even if it wasn't by choice. You stuck to your guns. I think people like to use the word 'selfish' to shame others. I claim selfishness proudly.
@@NyammingsThank you 😢. I went through a pretty rough period in the beginning, but my mother helped me get myself together. She said kids learn the most from watching their parents live, so I need to pick myself up and build a life 😂. Because suffering for your kids only equals the kid suffering too. Children or no children, humans need to have their own lives, things that are just for them, in order to be happy.
"social infertility" whew.. never heard of that but boy is that real! How you supposed to be married and with children when you can't meet a suitable partner to take care of you and said marriage and children? If I had a child right now, I would be immediately homeless. I don't understand how these males completely ignore this, the economic factors. So I'm selfish because I don't want to be starving and homeless with a child?
I feel like he's angry mostly because she's a ww. If she was any other person he wouldn't be so upset. Also, someone else mention they don't want little w. Girls to follow her footsteps.
I loved that woman’s video because I can relate to the concept of being single, child free, and happy! I have no regrets about enjoying my life without being married or having kids. I have been married before, and may decide to do it again someday, but for now I really love not being anyone’s wife. I enjoy not being anyone’s mother even more! No one can make me feel bad about how I feel or my reality. Every woman does not want a husband or kids and there’s nothing wrong with that. To each his own🤷♀️
They want you to cry for a partner then they start to tell you how bad you are that no one chooses you and you must change to a version that would be accepted among them..
I’m childfree and unmarried by choice at 33, and guess what? I spend so much time taking care of OTHER PEOPLE’S kids. It’s wild. And honestly, I wouldn’t be able to help these drowning parents if I had children myself. Childfree people are INTEGRAL to the village it takes to raise a child. And there is no support for families in this society! And seeing how much so many of my friends are struggling with the consequences of their decision to have kids, and experiencing what it takes to properly care for little humans, it just further solidifies my decision to never have children if I can help it. I’m someone who really values and needs my mental space. I need all the space I can get. Being responsible for the whole life of a child would be so detrimental to my mental health. I’m willing to help take care of children, but it’s always a relief when parent comes home and I can switch my mind back to prioritizing myself.
Choosing to be childless is a choice, up until a woman reaches age 37. By that point, mother nature makes the choice for her, and removes motherhood as an option. Singleness is a choice, but as a woman moves away from the last year of her prime child-bearing years which is age 27, Father time via his cruel cousin gravity, makes dating problematic because the men that women deem the most desirable are not checking for women who are past their prime child-bearing years... i.e. Lolo Jones and Eboni Williams. Who is going to be a woman's caretaker as her mental acuity and physical health begins to decline when she is post menopausal. Typically, that would be her spouse or children, but what are Single/childless women in their 60s going to do when their minds start to go and their bodies start breaking down? Making a permanent decision based on a temporary situation is unwise. When you are in your post menopausal stage, you are most likely going to need help.
@@dkt4377 Having had lots of conversations with post-menopausal women lately, I gotta say they are wise ladies and its not at all my experience that they are somehow more helpless at that age. My mother is in her late fifties, as are several of my aunts, as are several of their friends, and many of my co-workers. And my great aunts are in their seventies and eighties. Most of my friends moms are also post menopausal in their sixties. Not many of these women need help from their spouses or adult children, and not even my great aunts are experiencing cognitive decline. Actually, anecdotally, quite a few of them have adopted an attitude of no longer giving a crap lol, and several older ladies I know have started their divorce process recently because it seems that they reached a certain point where they felt like at their big age, they have less patience for the treatment and expectations they have had to endure in their marriages. My 53 year old aunt said she wasted her youth on her husband, no way she's gonna waste her golden years on him too lol! She said she's tired of focusing on everyone other than herself. And I think there is something to that- people talk big about marriage, but they forget to tell you that the woman gets the short end of the stick usually. Women are usually the ones taking care of everyone else in their so called post-menopausal stage, not the other way around. Its funny that you speak of post-menopausal as if that means a woman is less capable and more feeble, but its really just like middle-age. Please talk to more older women- you will learn a lot of wisdom and also likely have a lot of laughs at their keen humor too! For me, its been inspiring to see many of the older women in my life choose to become more independent and more loud and proud in their later years. A lot of old folks have the experience of all their adult children moving away to different states or countries, and they don't ever visit or call. Having kids does not in any way guarantee you will be taken care of by them when they grow up. Like in the case of one of my mom's aunts- she has two adult children who are special needs, and who she is still the primary care taker of at 70 years old. She worries what's gonna happen to her kids when she's gone. You cant be sure when you have a child who is going to be taking care of who when you get older- your kid could get in an accident and become paralyzed, or even die, so we shouldn't make assumptions. And that's not a good reason to have kids anyway. You should never bring a whole free-willed human being into this world for the purpose of obligating them to your care. That's not right. If the only reason for me to have a child is to obligate them to take care of me, then thats a completely selfish reason to have a kid, and I shouldn't do that. I'm not afraid of the future because I can prepare for the future- and as someone who won't have children, I can focus and prepare for my future all the better because I won't have to spend my resources and time thinking and caring for other people at my expense.
I think people who have kids and then realize parenthood is a lot harder, more expensive, and not what they expected are the ones who give single, childless a hard time. The ones that were more prepared and realistic about parenthood before they had kids seem perfectly fine with other people choosing to be single and childless (temporarily or permanently).
Honestly , I am single but i do have 1 child. They are 8 now and very introverted. I still have so much me time and im advancing in my career. It doesnt bother me when people , male or female , are happily single. You have your peace. I feel like even when women have the man, kid , house , car , etc we are still bullied and discredited. I asked my friends what is the goal post? Every single time i see a woman with what i named theres always a "but you havent done X." So what is the real goal post for women? Id rather be a crazy single empty nester dog mommy versus being underneath (and i mean this in several ways) a man who may secretly want to sabotage me.
Men seem quite acclimated to that idea that a woman’s life should revolve around him. Socially, sexually, with regards to being/becoming a parent, even financially - up until the last few recent decades it was super hard for women to make it without a husband, dad, uncle, brother - SOME man to help provide and protect. Now we’re more independent than ever and yes I think many men find that intimidating. As you stated - it’s not always because you don’t DESIRE a husband and children, and society certainly levels daily pressures against women who don’t, but yeah she better not dare choose to look on the bright side and enjoy her life as it is. It’s sometimes interpreted as “she doesn’t want us and she doesn’t agree with the way we’d rather see life play out,” which she never actually stated.
Society has a tendency to save women from the consequences of their poor life decisions. If women, en masse, choose to be single and childless, when they reach their golden years, and their mental acuity and physical health begins to decline, who will be their primary caretakers? Typically, that would be her spouse and or children, but who are single childless women going to rely on?
@@dkt4377 is that what you’re REALLY concerned about? Who will take care of women when they’re old? Or is it that women are increasingly choosing to not be doormats and mistreated for decades just to be able to say she has a man?
@@pricej4 The proliferation of contraceptives, especially "the pill," in 1959, led to the sexual liberation (free sex) movement in the 1960s. The idea of consequence free sex, that women could as sexual free with their bodies as any man could took root. Women began to have extremely high rates of premarital sex. In the 1970s, the rates of single unwed mothers skyrocketed. Then, in order to help women deal with the poverty resulting from having large numbers of children that they couldn't afford to have, we as a society created costly social welfare programs such as section 8 housing assistance, food stamps, cash assistance, travel vouchers... etc to help women deal with the consequences of not marring before they carried. Men are accustomed to being held accountable. If men make poor life choices that lead to poverty and destitution, we face homelessness. This is why 75-95% of homeless are men. However, women can escape homelessness by simply getting pregnant, in which case, the previously mentioned social welfare programs will conspire to save them from their poor life decisions. If women don't have a plan for who will care for them as old age sets in, we may have to install another costly social safety net of government funded caretakers to save elderly women, which will come out of my pocket in the form of taxes.
If you’ve chosen to marry and have kids why would it bother you if someone chose the opposite it’s so confusing to me. If you’re happy with your choice you wouldn’t care about someone else’s choices. It’s giving misery demands company to me!!!!
AGREE........WHAT IT DOES IS MAKES THEM QUESTION THEIR OWN CHOICES.....PLUS IT'S ROOTED IN THIER OWN SELF ESTEEM.... I HAVE 1 ADULT DAUGHTER AND YOU SHOULD SEE HOW HATEFUL WOMEN ARE BECUZ THEY WISH I HAD MORE KIDS.....THEY HATE THE FREEDOM AND BEAUTY OF HAVING JUST 1 VERSUS THEM BEING TIRED, AND BROKE ALL THE TIME BECUZ THEY HAVE MORE THEN 1.....
I can tell you as a woman who isn't single and does have kids, that's not the end of it. You have to have a perfect life, perfect husband, perfect kids. Friends and family will distance themselves if they don't like your husband. Other women will ridicule you, other low value men will screech that you are settling for an asshole, everyone will be telling you that you 'deserve better' while also holding contempt for you so even if women do have low standards and date and marry men who attractive women don't want, it still won't be good enough, it's not about just getting a man, it's about getting a man who other people respect and if you can't have that people will try to pressure you into being single and then ridicule you if you are single again.
This is very true and not talked about. The bullying I received from other women (friends, coworkers etc)when I dated someone they considered beneath me was horrible. My male friends switched up and made fun of me for dating a “loser”.
I am happily engaged and well provided for by a man that deeply loves me but when I was single I never felt the need to explain myself on the internet. I wish these women would stop feeling the need to validate their life choices on the internet like this when its obvious that many of them are looking for validation or acceptance of their situation. All it does is invite these predator sapiens to attack you and helps them to double down on their disgusting mindsets. Also ladies pls stay away from these psycho men and note the ones who expose their horrible mindsets online. Its ok to be single if you can't find someone. Better to be alone than with a horrible man.
That's one way to look at it. There's another point to consider though, visibility and reinforcements about choices. With more single, child-free women showing up, it sends the message that they exist and they're happy with that choice. Some might get married later or have a child, some might stay single, but it sends the message that women have choices. That happiness does not depend on outside factors. That they don't have to hurry to get a partner, or not at all.
Mothers share, wives share, men share but single women cannot share, childfree women cannot share. The internet is filled with different communities, who are you to tell others to not exist whilst everyone else can?
When married people and people with children stop getting on the internet and telling the world, when we didn't ask, how happy they are with their choices then I'm sure women who've chosen not to engage in that lifestyle will also stop. Until then we are going to let people celebrate their own lives how they feel like celebrating it.
It's okay to be single if you just want to be. It's also okay to express that you enjoy your single life just like its okay for you to express how you enjoy your married life.
47, single and child-free by choice for decades. I never understood why people stay bothered at how other humans choose to exist in this world. I am not bothered when parents gloat about their children or couples of their unions. I'm happy that people get to live the lives they want. Even if others are disgusted by my choices, I don't care. Never have. It's weird.
So, when your mental acuity and physical autonomy begins to decline as old age sets in, who is going to be your primary caretaker? Typically, this would be your spouse and or children but for women who are single and childless, what is the plan 🤔?
It's easy for men to preach about how important it is for women to have children when they're not actually involved in raising their own kids. So many fathers are not involved in their children's lives at all, they come home from work and barely even talk to them let alone spend quality time together. The husband is usually the one who talked the wife into having kids with him in the first place but then complains when their sex life dwindles because she's always busy with the kids...
I’m watching Board walk empire and being a woman most of the time till very recently meant being a breeder and a house keeper… and if that’s what you want then that’s good for you but there was a time women didn’t get to say I don’t want kids or anymore kids, and had to hide their feelings and hide using birth control, I am so grateful I am able to choose that I want to be child free along with my husband, we are both so happy and feel fulfilled and blessed we don’t need to have kids just to “fit in” Also side note: I met my husband when I was 31 almost 32 years old and I will say don’t ever put a tag on yourself or an expiration date on your love life!! Being single was also a fabulous experience for me and I got to learn so much about myself and built myself to be a better partner.
Steph you hit the nail on the head. It’s just people getting defensive over their plot in life and it’s on both sides tbh. I think we all feel disappointed in some area of our lives and seek validation so it’s understandable but the lack of self awareness in full grown people is astounding sometimes 😂
The real problem .is that in this society wht people are so afraid of not being in the majority. As the projection of this country demographic is wht will be the new minority. .1 reason for the over turn of roe v wade. So for a young fertile WW to not want to contribute to the cause . Brings out the rath , and anger of this group . Who already think they are being replaced..
Men assume that if you are happily single that you are sleeping around which is a lie,the red pill stuff is so toxic.Why can’t we let ppl live their life and make their own choices we are not here to please society we are living our own lives
Matt Walsh has a video out complaining that not enough white children are being born. He is not upset about women being single with no children. He is upset that white woman are not bringing forth white fruit. He said it blatantly in a video.
@@C12341 It's not bizarre. Paul in the Bible was upset that his own people were rejecting the Gospel message. By your reasoning, you'd think he would be content that a number of gentiles at least were listening. Humans in general have an inward desire for the greater good of their own people. You see this all the time with black people, Hispanics, etc, but for some reason, white people are expected to not care about their own and not advocate for their own interests like everyone else. Now that is bizarre.
A few notes: *I didn't go into detail about the woman who was hit while walking down the street because honestly, the situation and conversation around it are equally horrifying and absurd. When I say "I'm not interested in" the additional details about her story, I mean that I want to avoid any justifications for her attack as I feel it is in no way justifiable. *The Mila and Ashton saga is a WILD RIDE and when I recorded this, I had not gone down the rabbit hole. I have since, and yeah...it's a mess beyond belief. *I believe very strongly that my wig is preying on my downfall. She NEVER looks like this before filming. She's usually well behaved and maybe we've just reached our point of separation. Anyway, she's plotting against me and WILL be dealt with. Thanks for watching :)
I feel that the issue of violence against blk women is a topic worthy of being discussed; however, this brickgate story is not the foundation from which to have it. The young lady appears to be a scammer that often attempts to use victimhood to raise money.
Thank you so much for clearly and eloquently expressing the nuance to this topic. People don't want to see how complex things can be for women. And too many men are allowing themselves to get caught up into this internet mindset with a narrow and extreme view that they call 'modern women' which isn't helping. We're women trying to make the most of our lives, with a man and without. Just because you're single doesn't mean you hate men, but life shouldn't stop either.
Society has a tendency to save women from the consequences of their poor life decisions. If women, en masse, choose to be single and childless, when they reach their golden years, and their mental acuity and physical health begins to decline, who will be their primary caretakers? Typically, that would be her spouse and or children, but who are single childless women going to rely on?
@@dkt4377 @dkt4377 I believe you came to my comment with preconceived notions, or ill intentions or a lil' of both. I'm for women making the most out of, and enjoying their life whether it's with a man or not. Women are actively dealing with the consequences of their actions and their circumstances because that's what we do, carry on. All we can control is ourselves. And that concern of being cared for in old age is one for everyone. Single childless men and women, but also parents. Kids aren't your guaranteed caretaker. Maybe it's different in other countries, but in the US it's not a sure thing. Not to say it doesn't happen, but it's best to set things up as much as you can. And even then, nothing is guaranteed to go to plan.
@@candyDander The proliferation of contraceptives, especially "the pill," in 1959, led to the sexual liberation (free sex) movement in the 1960s. Women began to have extremely high rates of premarital sex. In the 1970s, the rates of single unwed mothers skyrocketed. Then, in order to help women deal with the poverty resulting from having large numbers of children that they couldn't afford to have, we as a society created costly social welfare programs such as section 8 housing assistance, food stamps, cash assistance, travel vouchers... etc to help women deal with the consequences of not marring before they carried. Men are accustomed to being held accountable. If men make poor life choices that lead to poverty and destitution, we face homelessness. This is why 75-95% of homeless are men. However, women can escape homelessness by simply getting pregnant, in which case, the previously mentioned social welfare programs will conspire to save them from their poor life decisions. If women don't have a plan for who will care for them as old age sets in, we may have to install another costly social safety net of government funded caretakers to save elderly women, which will come out of my pocket in the form of taxes.
@@candyDander if women were controlling themselves, they wouldn't have started producing nearly half of their children as illegitimate kids and unwed mothers.
We live in a deeply and undeniably natalist society. In the scope of human history, these conversations about being childfree are entirely new, yet natalists want childfree people to shut up about their choices/experiences. That's because these discussions potentially threaten the supply of free labor that women have always provided to men and society, simply due to the fact that they were never given a choice in the matter throughout history, And if we're honest, many women don't want other women to have access to choices that they themselves didn't have or weren't aware of.
You have been sold a lie, instead of working for yourself. Starting a family, having kids, grand children. Taking care of things, which again and again research has shown that the happiest thing a women could be doing is to start a family. Give a life, a woman is emotional being, who loves to nurture and take care of her family. But feminism has turned the tables, it sold you lies. So now instead of working for yourself. You work for the government. It's oppression when you husband asks you for to cook a meal. But when you boss screams at you for doing a bad job its called empowerment because your working. You call it free labor and oppression when you help around the house and take care of the family. But it's empowering to work half your life for a boss, while spending a good amount on taxes.
@@emersyn444 Feminism has turned the tables, it sold women lies. So now instead of working for yourself. You work for the government. It's oppression when you husband asks you to cook a meal for him. But when you boss screams at you for doing a bad job its called empowerment because your working. She calls it free labor and oppression when you help around the house and take care of the family. But it's empowering to work half your life for a boss, while spending a good amount on taxes.. Not being able to start your own life..
I just finished reading Sula, and this reminds me of that. Lord, how they celebrated when she died smh. I don’t know what “traditional” marrying age is these days, but is 29 late? Like, she’s about to go through her first Saturn return, is that late? And for that man’s ego to be so fragile that someone being happily single negates him being happily married, sheesh!😅
Off topic, but in your last video near the end, you talked about how you dislike femininity content in part because of how your expression of femininity was received in the past, but does that mean you've been discouraged from being feminine, or that people were telling you to be more feminine? That might make for an interesting video to hear your perspective. 👍
Thank you so much for this. I found your points on "Singleness is a reflection of your Community" very interesting. It certainly does apply to me because for a very long time I couldn't find a partner that is compatible. I've dated enough to know that I wasn't compatible even with my former partner. Eventually I realized that the way I view life and the things I value are different from my community. I did at some point start to feel like I'll never find a compatible partner but I also realized that I can also take advantage of the time I have alone to learn, to grow and experience positive things in from life. If it's meant to be it will happen.
The problem is that she is attractive and still young. I think if she didn’t meet society’s standards of attractiveness and she were 10-15 years older, she’d probably still get comments, but not anger and rage.
Steph, you said you understand why people have a problem with single women. I don't. Why do you think they have a problem with single women? I didn't really get a POV from you on that in this video.
Most women would chose marriage over dating and most men chose dating over marriage so we are at an impasse. Single-ness is the result. I suggest women stay off Tok Tok, don’t let these people see into your life. I could be wrong but I can’t think of one video where a woman clowns a man for being single and having a dog and a house.
Your voice is so soothing! I also appreciate your thoughtfulness. Your perspective is always unique - you think about things from a different level. I never thought about social infertility - I’ve definitely experienced that all my years thus far. Hopefully I can find a community suited for me.
I feel that some people who are married and have children envy single childless people. Especially the single ones who are happy about it. I'm 24, single, so happy, and I don't plan on getting married anytime soon. People need to realize that having children and getting married are a lot of work. Stress that some of us don't want right now. Like you mentioned sometimes people are single because of the options or lack of options that they have. That's totally fine because they don't want to settle just to say that they have a partner and children. Just because someone is a human doesn't need that they should be in a relationship.
Glad she took the opportunity to turn this into something good. I'm also 29 and single and childless. Spent alot of my life feeling unchosen and sure that'll continue 😂. But I've also always enjoyed my solitude and being able to do my hobbies without people around. 🤷♀️ The most brilliant and celebrated men in history acted the same way, and I tjink because of that we have more acceptance when men decide to take this path. Now with women taking on more roles that were exclusive to men, I think it makes sense that maybe we will have more women who invent things in their basements after spending months in focused solitude 😂🤷♀️. Weird thought, but it seems like people are very uncomfortable with women being "losers". Them acting in the ways that would have guys labelled as such. If they do it it's still portrayed as them being an attractive woman. And that also ties into the manic pixie girl trope. A woman who is undesired is invisible and non existent. That's the impression I'm getting from society as a whole.
I'm 33 and been with my boyfriend since age 26. Before him I've always been single. For some reason this irked people. As if I was not allowed to be young single and happy. I noticed now people treat me alot better. Like I'm more acceptable. Does matter if I'm happy or not as long as I'm not single people are ok smh
I think its not just hate for women who are single its more so hate for women who LIKE being single . As if being happy with your life is an insult to anyone living differently.
bingo
That part! They act like women are evil for not desiring partnership or can live happily without it. I think the reason is because they can’t dangle it in front of these women because it holds very little value to them.
They will criticize every aspect of a woman claiming she can't get a man then get triggered when she says she doesn't want one. The jokes are astronomical 😂
Insecure people don't like when you're at peace with something they are insecure about lol
Exactly
In the end men are terrified of not being wanted by women. So if a woman says she's single, not mingling and happy about it. It feels like a personal rejection of him. So he needs to find a flaw in her to soothe his ego and reaffirm his self-worth.
Men like that are useless at best
...especially when the girl in the video is attractive. If she was unattractive, he wouldn't have cared, he wouldn't have made a video bullying her.
* i have not watched his video, and i won't. *
Yes my bro was upset cuz women not wanting men. I'm like why do you feel they should want you. If your not together nor fckin, leave em be dang.
Right? I hear about happy people and just nod like “good for them.”
Yup!👏🏽
These men also shame you for being a single mother if she “chose wrong”. They’re also voting to eliminate welfare or daycare aid. They hate you for either choice. When I think of this…their opinion means less than nothing.
Exactly. They say motherhood is the best thing a woman can accomplish in her life BUT they will rain down HATE on women who are single mothers. Make it make sense.
Right and when women want a man that’s just faithful and considerate they label her as stuck up and that her standards are too high. Damned if we do damned if we don’t
You're so right! The goalpost is constantly moving because the bottom line is they just hate women. Nothing we ever do will be right for some folks, so we might as well live as we see fit.
And they want to outlaw abortion too. Vote.
Fr
Men get a pat on the back for refusing to become husbands and even when they abandon their own kids.
If men cannot threaten or scare women with the 'spinster' label it means they have to be likeable. Far too many men have skated by on women's desperation. Many men don't want to work on themselves or be likeable so they lash out in anger as more women find solace and peace in being alone.
And by being alone and single, you mean getting run trough by every other guy on dating apps. Go confuse others, men pity single women, because they have been sold a lie. lol
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Definitely agree with this. That’s why you see all these anti marriage Mgtow types so angry and resentful towards single women but especially older single women. If they really did not want relationships and wanted to get away from us they’d be happy that women are opting out and would try to encourage it, not try to convince and shame them they’ll be lonely or a cat lady
That makes a lot of sense. Since she didn’t choose any of them they are bitter and resentful
EXACTLY!❤
Women are not required to center men in our lives. Why is that hard to grasp . Strange
Someone on the Internet called me "self centered" because I referred to men as being decentered. He went nuts and told me that I was de-centered also and no one would want me. It was so odd 😂😂😂
Thank you.
This content creator also failed to mention that some women did choose to be single, and only focuses on those that couldn't find partners. She even says that she " understands" what those men attacking single women are trying to say. She did miss the point unfortunately on this topic.
@@faaaduma6876 I agree! Unfortunately the conditioning of patriarchal conditioning runs deeper through others.
@@SISTAGURL Ikr. But I really thought the creator of this channel aware of these things, being pro women and all. But I guess I was wrong.
I'm 47. Comfortable financially and my only child is an adult. I love my life and sometimes I wonder why I spent so much time wanting to be partnered. I absolutely love it here. Luxury vacations, sleeping in, spending selfishly on myself, dating when I want too.. It's so peaceful.
Wow I love that.
Am a widow for 10yrs now n never remarried.i have twin teens and am looking forward to such freedom inthe near future.
Enjoy and God bless you.
I'm so happy for you. Peace is EVERYTHING
AGREE CUZ I CAN MAKE MY PICK FOR A MAN AT ANYTIME......
Ditto! Except I’m 44 with 2 grown daughters. It’s absolutely glorious!
The anger actually comes from men that are single and angry. They can’t seem to understand how a woman can be single when they desperately want one. 😂
It very often comes from married men. They’re terrified their wives will see it and agree.
Choosing to be childless is a choice, up until a woman reaches age 37. By that point, mother nature makes the choice for her, and removes motherhood as an option.
Singleness is a choice, but as a woman moves away from the last year of her prime child-bearing years which is age 27, Father time via his cruel cousin gravity, makes dating problematic because the men that women deem the most desirable are not checking for women who are past their prime child-bearing years... i.e. Lolo Jones and Eboni Williams.
Who is going to be a woman's caretaker as her mental acuity and physical health begins to decline when she is post menopausal. Typically, that would be her spouse or children, but what are Single/childless women in their 60s going to do when their minds start to go and their bodies start breaking down?
@@amari7003 I worked in the retirement and life/health insurance industry for 10yrs... No one ever plans on physically or mentally regressing. But for many women who are post menopausal, it happens. Choosing to be single and childless is a choice rooted in making a permanent decision based on a temporary situation. You are not always going to be as sharp and as spry as you are in your 20s and 30s. The points I raised are very real and valid. Our society is not designed to deal with large numbers of single childless women who reach their golden year and have no clear plans as to who will be their future caretakers.
Society is far tougher on men than it ever has been on women. If men make poor life choices that lead to poverty and destitution, they face homelessness. However, women can escape homelessness by simply getting pregnant, in which case, an entire network of social welfare safety net programs will conspire to save her from her poor life choices via section 8 housing assistance, food stamps, cash assistance... etc. Men are accountable and accustom to dealing with this reality which is why 75-95% (the number fluctuate depending upon the homelessness study you read) of all homeless are men. I'm not concerned about your fathers situation. He made his bed and he'll suffer the consequences, like all men in general.
My responses are not meant to pressure women into being wives or push out unwanted children. It's meant to get young women thinking about legitimate end of life scenarios that they are likely to encounter. Pepole in their young years are not serously thinking about retirement. I worked in the retirement sector. I can assure you, I rarely received any inquiries from people below age 50 regarding their retirement benefit projections. Frankly, most of us don't even seriously look at our 401k projections until we are in our mid 40s. You assume that women already have plans for their old age and golden years, I know for a fact, that they are not fully aware of the ramifications. Relying on the community to pull together and look after you when you decline is frankly, wishful thinking and unreliable.
@@Ineverusemychannel AGREE..........PREACH!!!!!!
@@dkt4377 WHAT YOU SAID DOSEN'T APPLY TO ALL WOMEN....LOTS A WOMEN HAVE KIDS IN THE 40/50S AND STILL HAPPY AND PLENTY OF 50 YR OLDS STILL LOOK LIKE THIER IN THIER 20S......
Speaking as a 51-year-old woman who was raised in a conservative Christian household and environment?
Conservative and religious men often bristle at a woman who enjoys leisure. For some men, this is conscious. For some it is unconscious.
But I saw this growing up, and I see it now. Conservative and religious men often believe that every waking moment of a woman's life must be productive or profitable for a man.
Even if a woman is spending a lot of her time caring for children, a lot of conservative or religious men experience that as a woman being productive and profitable for them. Either because she is rearing and educating his legacy, so to speak, or she is providing him all the leisure he desires by relieving him of child care and domestic labor.
If you look at the tweets regarding this woman's TikTok, you will actually see men upset because women want more leisure.
Wow!!
@lucinda True!
This is an eye opener for sure. It's answered a lot of questions.
Ding ding ding! We have a winner. You are preaching to the choir!
Men fill over 90% of the high risk jobs in society... of course they want peace and leisure when they come home.
It's honestly scary how angry and violent I've seen conservative men get over funny short videos from single, childless women. Even some conservative women on RUclips get really hostile over the idea of women out there who aren't making marriage or children their top priority, nevermind a priority.
its envy plain and simple. Why do you get to do what you want when I can't? They begrudge single childless woman for the carefree life they have.
I’m conservative, and would never think that way. Most conservatives would never have hatred for single women, but the internet bring about the crazies.
true old-fashioned conservitives DON"T CARE. they just want you to protect the constitution
A lot of it has to do with them upset their ww won't have their bbz. Just my opinion.
It’s not a conservative vs liberal thing it’s all men of all backgrounds. Y’all have to get out of the group mentality. All of these entities are 2 sides of the same coin
I'm 37, single, childfree, and I spend my free time exercising, relaxing, and buying myself as many pairs of shoes as I want. I am so miserable and so sad that you hate me. LOL!!!!!
😄
😊😊
💜💜💜
You forgot to mention what else yo do in your free time, don't confuse others with words like "single".. It stil means that you are getting ran trough every night. We don't hate you, we pity such people. You have been sold a lie..
Exactly. I'm so hurt that strangers on the internet hate me for choosing the life I want and enjoying it 😂
LOVE this topic. The internet HATES a confidant, single young woman who does not succumb to pressures of patriarchy. Sexism only believes a woman exists to have children, so a woman who is outside of that is a threat to misogyny which is why Matt Walsh got BIG MAD🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
The internet are the same ones to says dont need men, but cry for help when there is danger and then go to the internet to say that men are not taking care of women.
@@jeong-ilkajokaya3849And who causes that danger you speak of?
@@dunemae and who says that they don’t need men? The same independent women. The danger can be anyone man or woman. Yall constantly talk about how women can do whatever by themselves and I say cool. Whatever happens I trust you can handle it by yourself.
If women, en masse, choose to be single and childless, who is going to be their caretakers when they reach their postmenopausal golden years of retirement age and their mental acuity and physical health begins to decline? Typically, that would be her spouse and/or children, but a single childless women would have neither?
@@jeong-ilkajokaya3849 you missed the entire point of my comment💀not gonna explain it to you, learn comprehension
11:43 I think the rage from men is coming from having limited options the more women choose single hood.
Yes, in their mind they have the imagination they can have us all. 😄
I thought they were getting their passports 🤔
@@roshellegouldbourne787 Passport bros are winning. West women are complaining about them. They are successfully seeking out the relationship outcomes that they want.
@@dkt4377 nahh, East asian women already dont want western men. And western men's privilege in southeast asia will end soon.
@@dkt4377if you have to go to a different country to date, something is very wrong with you or you have a selfish MOTIVE. Of course this will be overlooked. They are targeting certain countries for a reason, wake up!
The older generations messed up the world for their children. The state of the world and economy is not screaming "let's get together and build a family" it's very much "how do I survive another day" for far too many people. There is hardly any emphasis on community building, it's very much everyone has to look out for themselves and survive somehow. Thinking about supporting children is just...unimaginable to me at this point lol.
I tend to not believe in those things... Oh be green, don't eat meat, don't have kids, don't laugh or breath, our planet wil die...
If it seems unimaginable to take care of children, it''s because we have been conditioned to believe so, in a society where things are deliberately made more difficult to maintain.
@@vaastafraja5685It's not so much our planet will die but am I cool with my offspring living in a Mad Max scenario. It's the middle of September and it's still in the 90s and I lived here all my life. We should be in the mid 70s by now
@@vaastafraja5685 I didn't mean from a "the planet will die if you have children and eat beef" kind of way, moreso supporting myself is hard enough - I can't imagine being in a "traditional" family where I do what my dad did - which is support a family with one salary, while paying off students loans and paying a mortgage.
I agree with you. It is also obvious that times have shifted. As time passes each generation is a bit different. I personally respect anyone who knows themselves where they are in life. Sometimes singlehood is a choice and that is fine.
Singlehood doesn’t have much to do with your community. Some people are not dating intentionally or are taking a break intentionally.
I will probably never be able to afford children, soo…and with eminent environmental disaster and economic collapse, it seems unethical to bring them into this mess, unless perhaps you happen to be rich.
She never spoke out against marriage though.
It's a fact: not having children means you can be more carefree. This was triggering to some.
The people angry at her are giving:
-we regret the lifestyle we chose
-we regret having kids
-we wish we were free and are jealous
-how dare a single woman have life so (seemingly) easy
If hearing about someone's experiences causes you to feel upset or agitated, it may be worth considering the underlying issue. Perceiving it as a personal attack on your way of life could suggest a need for assistance or support.
I'll admit that I did find the video somewhat cringe, not due to this woman being single and enjoying it, but it comes across (to me) like a brag and an underhanded dig at women with children. My question is who her intended audience is. I don't give af about men and their reaction, but if it's a dig at married mother's (for which I am one), then there's a problem because I'm not about pissing on other women to make yourself feel superior.
@@DeeperThanMyThoughtsyeah i felt that way too. But it doesn't mean she should be getting death and grape threats from men
I don’t think people dislike single women with no children content creators. I think folks hate the assumptions that some of those creators make about married women and mothers. Let these creators tell it, they are the only ones that have free will and living their best lives. The rest of us are slaves to patriarchy. I have single friends never married with no children. I also have divorced friends some with kids and some with no children. My friends often tell me that I have the best life. Married many years with no children but lots of nieces and nephews.
I don’t feel the need to make any comparisons. Partnered or not, children or children or not. I want women to have an abundance of joy in their lives.
@@BlackTalkNoLimits nah dudes definitely hate single women creators. She's mostly being chastised by men not women. I mean Matt walsh doesn't even take care of his own kids. He was the one bragging that his wife does everything at home.
@DeeperThanMyThoughts She didn't piss on married mothers at all. She simply talked about her day. You're projecting. Your life is obviously not what you thought it would be. Work on yourself.
This conversation is long overdue, people DO NO LIKE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN WITH AUTONOMY, it threatens the status quo. And if you’re a black woman, they hate you more for it, ladies, stay feminine, stay protected, keep your money up, and live your life to the absolute fullest because what I know is that these people who are hating on black women in particular, would trade their miserable lives in seconds for yours🙏🏾
People don’t want to admit that black women are everything they wish they could be🙏🏾, that is why the hate is so strong and so vitriol. Please women wake up, because if someone is fighting this hard, that means that they have something to lose, meaning that you have more value than you ever dreamed of m, you just need to realize it 🙏🏾
It’s unfortunate that BW are tethered to dusty black males. Imagine if BW had actual men from the same race. Just imagine it.
Thank you for using the word AUTONOMY! It’s important to use the correct verbiage
So, if a woman chooses to be single and childless... who is going to be her caretaker when her mental acuity and physical health begins to decline? Most women, particularly blk women, don't make enough money to live comfortably in retirement. They typically rely on inheriting their spouses retirement benefits and social security... I don't think social security will be their for anyone born after 1997.
@@dkt4377there are plenty of people who got married and had kids and ending up in old age homes.
@@janedo-re-mi2738 True, but who made the estate planning decisions prior to getting to a nursing home? A stranger or the children?
More than half way through and I resonate with this so fully. Everyone screams “it takes a village” to raise children/ care for elders, but forget that single/child free people (especially women) are integral to the village. Shaming them makes no sense!
That part! People will hit up the auntie with no kids for money and babysitting, but often they don't stop to think that the reason she's available to and has resources to help the parents in her orbit is because she doesn't have her own children. Often these women are the ones picking up the slack when the "partner" isn't handling business.
@@hellzbelle229 I wouldn't got to the single auntie for babysitting my kids. I wan't my kids to be alive and healthy.
Good point.
@@vaastafraja5685not sure how you got from point a to b on this one. A lot of single childless people look after kids? I certainly didn't have kids when I was babysitting as a teen 😂
@@emily_8687 You said teen, she said women. A big difference. I have met single women in their 40's.. They are bitter, i wouldn't even wanna want her to touch my child.
They think we can magically make a whole healthy, financially, mentally, spiritually, monogamous man with a career appear. People don’t realize how difficult this is.
What a great response!
THIS!🙏
Unicorns
I think the point also is…. SOME WOMEN JUST DONT CARE TO ENTERTAIN MEN. Unless they want to. When they want to. Even if they are all those things. Men take work. Women are just simply choosing themselves
You forgot emotional stable and available sis 😂😂
Her agenda sounds dope. Making the most of being single is so fun! I'm gonna enjoy the heck out of both phases of my life.
Exactly, single is merely a phase. It certainly should not be considered a long term status.
@@dkt4377For many it's a long term status, and no shame, coercion or manipulation from society will change that. These women will keep being single happy and free while the loser incels haters keep hating.
@@diamondheart11 there are consequences and tradeoffs for every life choice made. When survival mode happens, I pray these single women don't find themselves wishing they had a man.
The delusion i see here, using a false term like "single" probably only means that you still getting ran trough every night to satisfy yourself.
Stop confusing yourself lol.
@@dkt4377survival mode??? Please grow up we live in a world where people find fulfilment in many different lifestyles.
What I don't get is why they singled her out. She made it clear she wants to be married and she wants to have kids. Why are they mad? She drank the kool-aid and they are complaining she's not dying fast enough. She has no control over that part!
I think their mad that their women aren’t having children fast enough or is purely Caucasian anymore so they are on a mission to ban things like safe abortions , pills and I heard condoms which that one is stupid because a lot of people use condoms
Most likely because she comes across as content. Which drives unhappy people wild. Especially if they know their unhappiness (discontent) stems from mainlining the Kool Aid.
"She drank the kool-aid and they are complaining she's not dying fast enough." Oh!!! 👏
“singleness is most often a reflection of the community that you find yourself within” VERY REAL. FACT.
Women without kids are expected to take criticism with that choice with a smile, but people who decide to have kids refuse to consider any of the downsides and take it as a personal attack when people mention it online.
I know ! Right ! There can be downsides. They can grow up in a way that you don't like. Also, as adults they could be a menace to society.
@@stephaniejsmes8991 What a cope, oh my kids could be grown into monster. So why don't i stay single for ever..... what a cope.
I love my daughter with all my heart best thing ever but there is a reason why I only have one😭😭😭. I wish people took it more seriously so we wouldn't have so many broken people running. Starting a family shouldn't be something society guilts into but rather something comes along once one has a solid foundation and dealt with any underlying emotional and mental things that could hinder the success development of a child. You don't have to be rich but stable
@@vaastafraja5685 Hey just responding to the original poster. So she was mentioning about the potential downsides. People make it seem like because society told them they should have children or because I am a girl or women I want children, then it will be puppy hugs and rainbows.
@@vaastafraja5685 why you so triggered all over the comments section lol, let people make their own choices and stop being so judgmental
Anytime someone describes their life as nicer or less stressful than people with kids, you can bet they’ve heard 10 times that many comments on how they’re sad, lonely, desperate, bitter, man-hating, blasphemous, egotistical, you name it woman for not having kids. Eeeeeeveryone, apparently 😤 is allowed to have a comment or opinion on single, childless women, but you are instantly hated on if you dare to question or comment on married people or those with kids. It’s just one part of the double standard against single childless women.
Im single and childfree. I choose both. I never wanted children and im happy at nearly 40 that I wont ever have children. I never saw myself giving my freedom, life, body and health up for a child. Im also single because I choose. Its so much more peaceful being single than being in a relationship that I see so many women in relatisonhips who are depressed because they basically serve their unappreciative men like they are just bangmaids and not partners.
I’m about half your age but I love hearing about happily single older women. People always try and sway younger women to change our minds but stories like this warm my heart ♥️
After a certain age, for women, singleness is no longer a choice, but a status they are resigned to. The men that most women want are not checking for women who are well past their prime childbearing years. What is more fulfilling? To be a woman at age 90+, sitting at a diner table at Christmas time with 60 pairs of eyes looking back at you that exist because you are their mother, grandmother, or great grands. OR is being 90+ with a bunch of employee of the week/month certificates from employers that replaced you as soon as you retired? You are making a judgment about marriage/motherhood only by pointing out the bad.... the benefits far exceed the cost.
@@dkt4377most 90 year olds are rotting away in loneliness lol. Married women aren’t immune to it
@dkt4377 You're idealising the concept of family and specially motherhood. Also, to have those "60 eyes looking at you" you'd have to have like 10 children, and each of those children should have partners and 4 children of their own.
Family is not only getting together on special ocassions, it involves a lot of sacrifices that some people don't find worth the reward. You're also assuming that singleness equals a lesser rewarding life, and that's not it. Being single means you can invest time on other things, whether is your professional life, your hobbies or engaging with people who are not related to you by blood. Those relationships can be rich and fulfilling too, they can give your life meaning and substance. Motherhood makes a lot of women miserable, not because it's bad but because they were forced into it.
@@jaouna My grandmother who passed over the weekend had 11 children. She was 93 and there are over 70 of us who are thankful for the life she had. I doubt we will dwell on her hobbies or her jobs during her funeral. We will all focus on the positive way she added to our lives.
As you age, your circle gets smaller. Yes, I have friends, but once they married and started their families, my contact with them became less and less. Ask the feminist from the 1970s who chose singleness... the spinster cat lady is not an appealing way to go. Singleness is a season in life... it was never meant to be a permanent status. Don't complain, when you reach retirement age and you are alone, no children to visit, or a husband to comfort you.
She wasn't even unreasonable with what she said. She even said that you could do all those things while being married and having kids plus she said it was like an affirmation to help her feel grateful and joyful for her current situation of being childless and not married... The people who responded harshly towards her were being way too dramatic and sensitive, focused on what another GROWN ADULT is doing with their life 🙄🙄🙄
single, childfree, 100% debt free with savings, and living my best life which wouldn't be possible if i had to waste my time on kids. i'm glad more people are speaking up because relationships, marriage, children, whatever ISN'T for everyone and some people would benefit from only focusing on themselves tbh
Children arent a waste. Theyre people.
It’s the debt free, money in savings (although I still have a mortgage, I don’t have any other debt) and living my best, life for me!
exactly and soem folks should not think about having family if they are abusers and cruel
@@vsperatoswell clearly she feels it would be a waste of her time to do parenting, so it's great that she decided not to have kids. It's a win-win!
Then focus on yourself no need to slander on other people’s lifestyle lol just say I’m single and child free. That’s it.
Men can accept and adore a young unmarried childless woman if she’s a fictional character like Wonder Woman or Captain Marvel. Yet, a real woman living her best carefree life disturbs their peace and sanity🙄
Captain Marvel is a chick?
@@Madamchief ah yeah. Always have been
@@camiba6773 🤷♀️ I dunno marvel but I have always wondered if female characters are written for the male gaze
As a lady comic fan myself, what a valid point!
@@Madamchiefyes captain marvel is a woman 😂 unless you are getting confused with captain America lol. And yes to your 2bd question about the male gaze. Men did create these woman characters characters. Look up some comic book pictures of Wonder Woman and she-hulk online. They didn’t dress them like that for nothing.
Imagine people triggered what someone is doing on Saturday? Those haters are everywhere. I'm 36 child free woman myself, and I don't post anything to the internet. And the only times I took pictures I just share it with family and friends.
36 and no kids, sjees, must be lonely.
@@vaastafraja568536 and no kids is a blessing. If you stuck with kids and now express your misery by bullying childless people online - go to therapy.
@@vaastafraja5685 if you are unable to build connection to anyone who isn't either a person you have seggs with, or your genetic offspring, that is your problem. Most people can.
needless to say, 36 is a very young age. I am 29 and still live my life not very different from how I lived in my 20, just a job instead of studying. Again, if you feel old at 36, that is your problem.
I also think people ignore how many people actually settle. I was engaged a few times but did not take the leap because I knew I would be settling. I would love to be married, but I don’t want to get married just to say “ I’m married”. I really want a partner. That’s not easy to find.
Agree totally
They know. Some are triggered because they felt the pressure to settle and it's pretty awful for them now. So seeing someone who's not settling and enjoying their life without feeling pressured to choose any man that comes their way infuriates them.
❤
A man unpartnered is not even a topic of conversation
A man can defer marriage or children well into his 40s and still have a chance of finding a wife... particularly if he has access to fame and resources (Al Pacino is approaching 85yrs old, he has a baby mama who is in her 20s).
@@dkt4377 missed the whole point. A woman being unpartnered means she doesn’t want a partner. Those things don’t matter. Why does that bother men?
@@dkt4377 it means she doesn’t want the responsibility of a man or children! Why is that a problem for men to grasp.
@@SISTAGURLbecause men can’t grasp that a Woman life can be her own and not that of service to someone else
@@elenawalker517 they really don’t get it. Women are enjoying their California King beds ALONE! Waking up free with no headaches of who needs what and why. Except themselves. It’s very triggering to them . Oh well 🌸🌺🌼
Thank you for this video! It is very true. People look at single woman as though we've made the choice not to partner. When in reality for a lot of women, there weren't any viable options in her vicinity or men who may want short-term versus long-term mating.
Also, you introduced a new coined term, "social infertility".
I'm writing this comment before I watch the video or read any of the comments. A few weeks ago I was talking with a friend and she said 'do you realise that there is always something to do in the house?' I responded ' Not in my house. That is because you have children and a man that lives with you.' I think the concern is that if this idea really takes off then men will be getting much less sex. The women will be having less children thus providing less slaves..I mean less workforce.
we know what you mean and you're right. Forced free labour is the definition of slavery and if you have to do it because you're expected to without compensation...
It's hate for all women. They just hate hate hate. They will pick something/anything
To tear a woman down. She can be married. I'm a married stay at home mom and a man called me a legal prostitute 😂.
Single moms get hate, Single women get hate, only fan girls get hate etc.
The only thing women can do is live your life how you want too, and other women should be supportive.
Agreed 🙌🏽
Women who are single as they get older, it’s because they are usually educated or have better jobs. It enables them to not have to put up with bad behavior from their partners and they can leave. Even if children are involved. They don’t have to stay in a relationship that doesn’t make them happy or that they are abused in because they feel they can’t make it on their own. I encourage all women to get educated and maintain employment when married or in a long term relationship so that you don’t feel trapped and can leave when a relationship turns bad or unhappy. Men are now aware of this and are angry about it. They don’t have money control over women anymore.
Nailed it!!
You should look up PEW research.
It shows that women who are working class (highschool educated or less) are less likely to get married in the first place, more likely to get divorced, but less likely to file for divorce.
while college educated women are: more likely to get married, more likely to stay married longer, less likely to get divorced but are more likely to file for divorce.
Lets repeat this: Working class, ie poorer, women are LESS likely to get married, MORE likely to get divorced, have SHORTER marriages, but are LESS likely to file for divorce.
Hmm -- what could be the underlying cause of this?
Its M N
Divorce is a privilege. And the women with options are the ones who have access to higher-quality marital prospects, and dont have to tolerate a lot of behaviors.
While poorer women are less likely to file for divorce, because they are more desperate to hang on. But more likely to end up divorced anyway.
reality.
This trolololol
Not really... society has a tendency and track record from saving women from the consequences of their poor life decisions.
I was married for a long time. I gave birth to two humans who are now adults. I have actively discouraged both of my children from marrying and parenting. I've no idea if either of them will do these things at some point in their lives. Having found my own life to be fuller, more meaningful, more joyful, and just plain fabulous when not partnered with a human male or raising children, I encourage everyone to consider this in their own lives. I adore my children and they have been quite spoiled by me over the course of their lives. I am glad that they are here and I enjoy watching them map out their lives.
I believe that the people who get offended by single, child-free women think that they deserve something special for having married and parented. You don't get cookies for this, and I do not believe that anyone should be lauded for it, either.
As science continues to show us, women are better off without males in romantic relationships because there are so few of them who do any internal work that it's much too difficult to find one worth having around. I have yet to miss any of the men from my past. I have never felt lonely and I am quite happy with my cats. I proudly discuss them whenever I get the chance. I'll never have a dog because that's too much like having a human child. Been there. Done that. No thank you for another helping.
I'd like for us to leave women alone, especially single, child-free women. For those who have chosen to not marry or parent, let them live in peace. Their choices aren't harming anyone and if something thinks that it is, the problem is with THEM.
I'm with you. People fought and risked their lives to give women the option in the first place. We do it for our ancestors who couldn't.
@@BoahemaaGreat point! Never before in history have women been in charge of their reproduction to the degree they now are. I don’t think things are ever going back to the way they were.
Very well said ❤
To be a free woman is an act of resistance. That’s why it makes others angry.
I had been single for a long time. It came to a point that I really felt satisfied with my life. I was and still at peace with my life. I could take time with my skincare routine and watching series. I am happy that more women are becoming more happy with being single.
Why does having a cat an insult??????? Cats are precious creatures.
I mean its been the status quo of the world for ever. Fairytales have a childless/single woman who is the villain (witch). Roald Dahl has a book that says not liking children and being bald makes you a witch. If people mock parents its a backlash to the loud proclamation that childless people are not living fulfilled lives.
After suffering consequences of being a tradcon pick me, I have now embrace being single and childfree.
(I literally escaped living with an abusive alcoholic ex-marine and started over by living in my car over living with him or any man again. Took several months to get back in my feet and back living comfortably again.)
I feel more at peace, free, and know that the best person to take care of the old me is the YOUNG ME by wisely investing for my own wealth and taking care of my own health! It's fun to be a happy hobbyist tackling my bucket list, becoming a polyglot, traveling, baking, painting, and just doing whatever I want whenever I want-especially without the constant fear and anxiety I used to feel.
We don't talk enough about the joys of leisure, especially as an adult. So it's great to see you mention all the things you do to fill your time that isn't focused on just work or being of service to other people at all times.
Somehow i don't believe these stories. Men being abusive is something from the 70's, before the sexual revolution and before the times when women gained their rite vote. Don't know a single guy who has admitted to me being abusive. Nowadays it just feels like that the word abusiveness is used as weapon to justify divorce. I have been trough this myself, have been called abusive after just having and opinion about certain matter.
You sure you just wasn't happy with him? And wanted to get single again. Just so you could live your life on your own terms without society judging you what you actually secretly wanted and did?
@@vaastafraja5685 go to your local battered woman’s shelter, or a public court space on any regular day. Come back after that with your comment.
@@SISTAGURL I have been actually, the actually numbers and statistics don't match up. Tables have turned along time ago. Most if not all of the cases filed are being used as a weapon. We have seen this with Amber heard using her position to destroy Johhny dep. Danny Masterson just got jailed for 30 years for what i refuse to believe he did. And honestly i don't believe that the justice system in the US does any good to good honest men.
@@vaastafraja5685 Bye troll.
Marriage was never a goal for me or having kids. I am going on 4 years single, I live alone in a beautiful apartment and I'm not in any rush to be in a relationship. If it happens, cool, if it doesn't I could careless. I don't foresee myself having children either🙂
What more could one want?
@@Boahemaa to own my own house :)
Some people hate when you don't make the same lifestyle choices as them because they're craving validation for making them lol smh
THIS
They hate single women. Women with kids, women over 25 and women who decide not to have kids.
I'd like to add that society just doesn't want us to be happy. Young or old.
I’m 29 with no children. I just got my BA and I currently live with my bf who is supporting me while I hunt for a job. Life is good and easy. When I think of children I get anxiety. His sister is my age, married with two kids, and looks exhausted. Also, my sister is married and is near my age with two children. She too looks exhausted. My bf and I talk marriage and children and we both aren’t ready yet. Just living life at the moment.
I should also note, I am black and my bf is white. He has an amazing career and working towards starting his own business. Our families are merged and I know all of his friends and his friends wives + children. Fun fact, my bf is younger than me. Only by a year though.
Social media is a joke. Everyone is online spewing garbage about what they think… I seriously laugh at some of the conversations people are having. I separate social media and reality. They are not the same.
Something interesting, most of our friends are married or in relationships but we also have single friends and enjoy their company too.
Social media makes things complicated that do not need to be.
There’s nothing wrong with being single. It’s a time where both women and men get to learn themselves.
Get a pet so you can nurture something cute together if you feel that urge :). Plenty of couples remain happy and childless!
People have a problem when one lifestyle is deemed inferior to the other. I'm married with children and I dont think my lifestlye choice is better than a single persons life. I understand that both have purpose and people simply have different walks. Putting someone down for walking their walk indictes you feel you are on the wrong path.
This is the thing.
Putting someone down for walking their walk indictes you feel you are on the wrong path.................WOW........PREACH!!!!!.............I LOVE THESE WORDS!!!!!
It's unfortunate because it's not just on the internet. It's in real life too. I cannot walk down the street or on an exercise trail without being harassed or verbally assaulted by men in my community because I'm "attractive" and out by myself or without a man essentially. What century are we in?!
It’s jealousy of those single. Singleness has tons of advantages. Whereas being in relationships creates a lot of burdensome baggage and disadvantages. I like my freedom, peace and space. Doing what I want when I want without having to clean up after someone else
AGREE
When he’s not working (if he even has a job) men (married or single) spend their days with p04n and video games yet it’s a problem when a single woman decides to go to concerts and watch tv? These dudes are something else.
Lol... the vast majority of men are employed. Why make assumptions about men based on the lowest performing men and not the average?
NOBODY IS "TO OLD" TO FIND LOVE. I KNOW COUPLES WHO HAVE MET AND MARRIED AFTER 60 YEARS OLD.
Exactly! I didn't know 46 was too old, guess I only have 2 more years to go....LOL!
@@buttarain27 I'm in the same boat as you. #44 😉
Yeah but what about f you don't want to. What if you like being single. Let people live the way they want to and leave by them alone
@@camiba6773 NO BODY SAID U HAVE 2 MARRY STOP BEING SK SENSITIVE MAYBE THATS Y U DON FIND LUV
Last 3 weddings I attended were couples 40 plus! One was on his 2nd marriage.
You are probably the most unbiased person on this entire platform. You analyze data in such a fair and clear way. We can all learn something from your style of reporting!
Steph what you said at 12:37 about the reaction and the "why" I think is so interesting!! There's a lot of offense on the conservative side of the spectrum when young women (especially religious women or women who are devout in their faith) decide to focus on their careers for a period of time, or decide to stop pressuring themselves into marriage. And it very well could be because those are the types of women the conservative men want to marry, so they worry their dating pool is shrinking- if not for themselves then for their friends. Great video, as always!
Also historically, white women have always voted the same way as their husbands. So his vote counts as two!
As white women stay unmarried, his vote is only ONE.
Now I can’t say this for other races and politics.
Oh my gosh I just heard a term that was quite accurate as to what I am certain other women have seen as well, "Nanny McBangmaid" and its so awful for women who experience this, but man so accurate of how many males view us, especially Black women. Sad & disheartening.
This one is more popular “mommy bangmaid” or just a “bangmaid”
I think men life Matt Walsh just got married and had kids because it gives them status in their community. They never wanted to do it and let’s be honest, it’s not difficult to get married and have kids, having a happy marriage and raising good kids is difficult of course, but walking down the aisle and not wearing a condom isn’t hard. For most people that is the height of their accomplishments in life so they get defensive when they see others who don’t conform. Anyone who is happy in a marriage and family doesn’t lash out at others.
But Matt Walsh has accomplished a lot, probably more than you, and he still values marriage. I don't understand how you can belittle marriage and him, while he's done both and it sounds like you haven't. I am not a Matt Walsh fan at all btw, but a successful writer, podcaster, and cultural influencer over the Duchess of Success makes sense, right?
Why are the men already here complaining about how hard it is for them to date and how they hate seeing privileged people complain😂 She wasn't even condescending enough for people to get so upset. She even said she'd been hard on herself.
If my husband were to be hit by a bus or something there is no way I would ever date again. Guys have gotten absolutely vile since I was on the market. I do not blame younger women for steering clear.
Matt went off because she's a conventionally attractive blonde white woman. If she was black saying the same no one would say anything. I'm saying this as single (not by choice) conservative minority woman.
I agree and i am a minority women too
A black woman wouldn’t get a reply from that white man but there are black women who get lit up for being single by black men.
Exactly. I have to remind myself that they're not talking to ME. They ain't talkin to you, her, her. None of us 😎
We aren't being stalked or kidnapped either.
Let them do them.
@@briannadickson2884 Right. A lot of conservative (and some liberal) men feels disappointed when a pretty white girl opts out of the dating game.
Exactly. And you can tell that she’s also upset by her current single status because she’s an attractive, blonde, white woman. Society says she’s not supposed to be single still at her age and you can tell she believes in that narrative, too.
I’m in my twenties and I personally want to eventually have marriage and children but not just for the sake of being in one. Both of them are lifetime commitments especially children and with the cost of living among being emotionally and mentally available to bring someone into the world and nurture and guide them is a deal of responsibility and patience. I don’t blame some people for not wanting to have them bc of that and also just bc of messed up this society, having those things doesn’t necessarily equate to happiness. There are married people who hate each other and people that resent their own children(some in my own family).
Years back, I read a book on authoritarian personalities by Dr. Robert Altmeyer, and it really helped me understand why people feel threatened by those who are different from themselves. It's a major issue in our society today.
It’s crazy bc the internet really is like “HOW DARE YOU BE HAPPY WHILE SINGLE AND WITHOUT CHILD!!!” Lmfaooo like what the hell, so sorry that women can have more purpose to their life than having their primary focus be pleasing a man and bearing someone’s child. The other thing I hate about the “lonely” comments are that, are we forgetting many people in relationships are STILL lonely (but that’s socially acceptable loneliness??)? And they act like single people don’t have family and friends who love and care about them as well. Someone who had a husband who passed away could be “70 and lonely”, is that not the same?? Lmao It truly comical, and comes off as jealousy of single childless people at this point, and that’s speaking as someone who isn’t even in this boat. smh Lmfao
Would they be so upset if that woman wasn't "pretty"/ their type. I don't think so. I feel like a lot of men are upset because they see a woman who is rejecting them, and a waste of good jeans pants' by her not having kdz. That's my take.
AGREE CUZ I HAVE ONE CHILD AND MEN WERE SHOCKED THAT I NEVER HAD ANY MORE....
I am single mom BUT, I am not the primary parent of my one child. I chose to get married, have a kid, and get divorced; I didn't chose to to be the vacation parent though. My ex fought me for primary residency because he thought it would force me to not move out of state, it didn't. So for 16 years I have lived almost like a single child-free woman because I have a LOT of time without my child physically with me. I have built a life filled with hobbies and little trips, going to concerts, nurturing my two long-time friendships, etc. As my daughter has gotten older, I've been able to include her more in these things, and she's become very comfortable and appreciative of all the space and freedom she has when she's with me - and the ex has been mad ever since. He's gotten married twice more after me and had more children, all the while attempting to shame me over not being a "real mom" and not helping him enough. He means with money but our parenting plan is VERY detailed and clear on who pays for what, and my daughter is also old enough for me to give money directly to her now. Nevertheless, I did not choose to live primarily without my child and it sucks. At the same time, what am I supposed to do? Cry everyday about it? Not spend that time developing myself, not only to be a happy person but to be a quality mother that my daughter can learn from? So, yeah, I enjoyed all this free time I've had even though I wanted something different. It has still been a happy life and as my daughter enters adulthood, there will be a new chapter for us to be together the way we weren't before. My ex still calls me "selfish" but I don't care. To expect the single and child-free, whether by choice or circumstance, to not still live happily is weird and those people should really unpack that.
I love that you weren't the primary caregiver - even if it wasn't by choice. You stuck to your guns. I think people like to use the word 'selfish' to shame others. I claim selfishness proudly.
@@NyammingsThank you 😢. I went through a pretty rough period in the beginning, but my mother helped me get myself together. She said kids learn the most from watching their parents live, so I need to pick myself up and build a life 😂. Because suffering for your kids only equals the kid suffering too. Children or no children, humans need to have their own lives, things that are just for them, in order to be happy.
"social infertility" whew.. never heard of that but boy is that real! How you supposed to be married and with children when you can't meet a suitable partner to take care of you and said marriage and children? If I had a child right now, I would be immediately homeless. I don't understand how these males completely ignore this, the economic factors. So I'm selfish because I don't want to be starving and homeless with a child?
I feel like he's angry mostly because she's a ww. If she was any other person he wouldn't be so upset. Also, someone else mention they don't want little w. Girls to follow her footsteps.
THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I loved that woman’s video because I can relate to the concept of being single, child free, and happy! I have no regrets about enjoying my life without being married or having kids. I have been married before, and may decide to do it again someday, but for now I really love not being anyone’s wife. I enjoy not being anyone’s mother even more! No one can make me feel bad about how I feel or my reality. Every woman does not want a husband or kids and there’s nothing wrong with that. To each his own🤷♀️
They want you to cry for a partner then they start to tell you how bad you are that no one chooses you and you must change to a version that would be accepted among them..
THEY WISH..........CUZ I OVE TELLING PEOPLE IM SINGLE CUZ I HAVEN'T MADE MY CHOICE YET....
I’m childfree and unmarried by choice at 33, and guess what? I spend so much time taking care of OTHER PEOPLE’S kids. It’s wild. And honestly, I wouldn’t be able to help these drowning parents if I had children myself. Childfree people are INTEGRAL to the village it takes to raise a child. And there is no support for families in this society! And seeing how much so many of my friends are struggling with the consequences of their decision to have kids, and experiencing what it takes to properly care for little humans, it just further solidifies my decision to never have children if I can help it. I’m someone who really values and needs my mental space. I need all the space I can get. Being responsible for the whole life of a child would be so detrimental to my mental health. I’m willing to help take care of children, but it’s always a relief when parent comes home and I can switch my mind back to prioritizing myself.
Choosing to be childless is a choice, up until a woman reaches age 37. By that point, mother nature makes the choice for her, and removes motherhood as an option.
Singleness is a choice, but as a woman moves away from the last year of her prime child-bearing years which is age 27, Father time via his cruel cousin gravity, makes dating problematic because the men that women deem the most desirable are not checking for women who are past their prime child-bearing years... i.e. Lolo Jones and Eboni Williams.
Who is going to be a woman's caretaker as her mental acuity and physical health begins to decline when she is post menopausal. Typically, that would be her spouse or children, but what are Single/childless women in their 60s going to do when their minds start to go and their bodies start breaking down?
Making a permanent decision based on a temporary situation is unwise. When you are in your post menopausal stage, you are most likely going to need help.
@@dkt4377 Having had lots of conversations with post-menopausal women lately, I gotta say they are wise ladies and its not at all my experience that they are somehow more helpless at that age. My mother is in her late fifties, as are several of my aunts, as are several of their friends, and many of my co-workers. And my great aunts are in their seventies and eighties. Most of my friends moms are also post menopausal in their sixties. Not many of these women need help from their spouses or adult children, and not even my great aunts are experiencing cognitive decline. Actually, anecdotally, quite a few of them have adopted an attitude of no longer giving a crap lol, and several older ladies I know have started their divorce process recently because it seems that they reached a certain point where they felt like at their big age, they have less patience for the treatment and expectations they have had to endure in their marriages. My 53 year old aunt said she wasted her youth on her husband, no way she's gonna waste her golden years on him too lol! She said she's tired of focusing on everyone other than herself. And I think there is something to that- people talk big about marriage, but they forget to tell you that the woman gets the short end of the stick usually. Women are usually the ones taking care of everyone else in their so called post-menopausal stage, not the other way around. Its funny that you speak of post-menopausal as if that means a woman is less capable and more feeble, but its really just like middle-age. Please talk to more older women- you will learn a lot of wisdom and also likely have a lot of laughs at their keen humor too!
For me, its been inspiring to see many of the older women in my life choose to become more independent and more loud and proud in their later years.
A lot of old folks have the experience of all their adult children moving away to different states or countries, and they don't ever visit or call. Having kids does not in any way guarantee you will be taken care of by them when they grow up. Like in the case of one of my mom's aunts- she has two adult children who are special needs, and who she is still the primary care taker of at 70 years old. She worries what's gonna happen to her kids when she's gone. You cant be sure when you have a child who is going to be taking care of who when you get older- your kid could get in an accident and become paralyzed, or even die, so we shouldn't make assumptions.
And that's not a good reason to have kids anyway. You should never bring a whole free-willed human being into this world for the purpose of obligating them to your care. That's not right. If the only reason for me to have a child is to obligate them to take care of me, then thats a completely selfish reason to have a kid, and I shouldn't do that. I'm not afraid of the future because I can prepare for the future- and as someone who won't have children, I can focus and prepare for my future all the better because I won't have to spend my resources and time thinking and caring for other people at my expense.
I think people who have kids and then realize parenthood is a lot harder, more expensive, and not what they expected are the ones who give single, childless a hard time. The ones that were more prepared and realistic about parenthood before they had kids seem perfectly fine with other people choosing to be single and childless (temporarily or permanently).
Honestly , I am single but i do have 1 child. They are 8 now and very introverted. I still have so much me time and im advancing in my career. It doesnt bother me when people , male or female , are happily single. You have your peace. I feel like even when women have the man, kid , house , car , etc we are still bullied and discredited. I asked my friends what is the goal post? Every single time i see a woman with what i named theres always a "but you havent done X." So what is the real goal post for women? Id rather be a crazy single empty nester dog mommy versus being underneath (and i mean this in several ways) a man who may secretly want to sabotage me.
Men seem quite acclimated to that idea that a woman’s life should revolve around him. Socially, sexually, with regards to being/becoming a parent, even financially - up until the last few recent decades it was super hard for women to make it without a husband, dad, uncle, brother - SOME man to help provide and protect. Now we’re more independent than ever and yes I think many men find that intimidating. As you stated - it’s not always because you don’t DESIRE a husband and children, and society certainly levels daily pressures against women who don’t, but yeah she better not dare choose to look on the bright side and enjoy her life as it is. It’s sometimes interpreted as “she doesn’t want us and she doesn’t agree with the way we’d rather see life play out,” which she never actually stated.
Society has a tendency to save women from the consequences of their poor life decisions.
If women, en masse, choose to be single and childless, when they reach their golden years, and their mental acuity and physical health begins to decline, who will be their primary caretakers? Typically, that would be her spouse and or children, but who are single childless women going to rely on?
@@dkt4377 is that what you’re REALLY concerned about? Who will take care of women when they’re old? Or is it that women are increasingly choosing to not be doormats and mistreated for decades just to be able to say she has a man?
@@pricej4 The proliferation of contraceptives, especially "the pill," in 1959, led to the sexual liberation (free sex) movement in the 1960s. The idea of consequence free sex, that women could as sexual free with their bodies as any man could took root. Women began to have extremely high rates of premarital sex. In the 1970s, the rates of single unwed mothers skyrocketed. Then, in order to help women deal with the poverty resulting from having large numbers of children that they couldn't afford to have, we as a society created costly social welfare programs such as section 8 housing assistance, food stamps, cash assistance, travel vouchers... etc to help women deal with the consequences of not marring before they carried.
Men are accustomed to being held accountable. If men make poor life choices that lead to poverty and destitution, we face homelessness. This is why 75-95% of homeless are men. However, women can escape homelessness by simply getting pregnant, in which case, the previously mentioned social welfare programs will conspire to save them from their poor life decisions.
If women don't have a plan for who will care for them as old age sets in, we may have to install another costly social safety net of government funded caretakers to save elderly women, which will come out of my pocket in the form of taxes.
If you’ve chosen to marry and have kids why would it bother you if someone chose the opposite it’s so confusing to me. If you’re happy with your choice you wouldn’t care about someone else’s choices. It’s giving misery demands company to me!!!!
AGREE........WHAT IT DOES IS MAKES THEM QUESTION THEIR OWN CHOICES.....PLUS IT'S ROOTED IN THIER OWN SELF ESTEEM....
I HAVE 1 ADULT DAUGHTER AND YOU SHOULD SEE HOW HATEFUL WOMEN ARE BECUZ THEY WISH I HAD MORE KIDS.....THEY HATE THE FREEDOM AND BEAUTY OF HAVING JUST 1 VERSUS THEM BEING TIRED, AND BROKE ALL THE TIME BECUZ THEY HAVE MORE THEN 1.....
I can tell you as a woman who isn't single and does have kids, that's not the end of it. You have to have a perfect life, perfect husband, perfect kids. Friends and family will distance themselves if they don't like your husband. Other women will ridicule you, other low value men will screech that you are settling for an asshole, everyone will be telling you that you 'deserve better' while also holding contempt for you so even if women do have low standards and date and marry men who attractive women don't want, it still won't be good enough, it's not about just getting a man, it's about getting a man who other people respect and if you can't have that people will try to pressure you into being single and then ridicule you if you are single again.
This is very true and not talked about. The bullying I received from other women (friends, coworkers etc)when I dated someone they considered beneath me was horrible. My male friends switched up and made fun of me for dating a “loser”.
I am happily engaged and well provided for by a man that deeply loves me but when I was single I never felt the need to explain myself on the internet. I wish these women would stop feeling the need to validate their life choices on the internet like this when its obvious that many of them are looking for validation or acceptance of their situation. All it does is invite these predator sapiens to attack you and helps them to double down on their disgusting mindsets. Also ladies pls stay away from these psycho men and note the ones who expose their horrible mindsets online. Its ok to be single if you can't find someone. Better to be alone than with a horrible man.
That's one way to look at it. There's another point to consider though, visibility and reinforcements about choices. With more single, child-free women showing up, it sends the message that they exist and they're happy with that choice. Some might get married later or have a child, some might stay single, but it sends the message that women have choices. That happiness does not depend on outside factors. That they don't have to hurry to get a partner, or not at all.
Mothers share, wives share, men share but single women cannot share, childfree women cannot share. The internet is filled with different communities, who are you to tell others to not exist whilst everyone else can?
When married people and people with children stop getting on the internet and telling the world, when we didn't ask, how happy they are with their choices then I'm sure women who've chosen not to engage in that lifestyle will also stop. Until then we are going to let people celebrate their own lives how they feel like celebrating it.
It's okay to be single if you just want to be. It's also okay to express that you enjoy your single life just like its okay for you to express how you enjoy your married life.
AGREE.........
47, single and child-free by choice for decades. I never understood why people stay bothered at how other humans choose to exist in this world. I am not bothered when parents gloat about their children or couples of their unions. I'm happy that people get to live the lives they want. Even if others are disgusted by my choices, I don't care. Never have. It's weird.
So, when your mental acuity and physical autonomy begins to decline as old age sets in, who is going to be your primary caretaker? Typically, this would be your spouse and or children but for women who are single and childless, what is the plan 🤔?
It's easy for men to preach about how important it is for women to have children when they're not actually involved in raising their own kids. So many fathers are not involved in their children's lives at all, they come home from work and barely even talk to them let alone spend quality time together. The husband is usually the one who talked the wife into having kids with him in the first place but then complains when their sex life dwindles because she's always busy with the kids...
People are weird how is not having kids threatening you who have kids.
I’m watching Board walk empire and being a woman most of the time till very recently meant being a breeder and a house keeper… and if that’s what you want then that’s good for you but there was a time women didn’t get to say I don’t want kids or anymore kids, and had to hide their feelings and hide using birth control, I am so grateful I am able to choose that I want to be child free along with my husband, we are both so happy and feel fulfilled and blessed we don’t need to have kids just to “fit in”
Also side note: I met my husband when I was 31 almost 32 years old and I will say don’t ever put a tag on yourself or an expiration date on your love life!! Being single was also a fabulous experience for me and I got to learn so much about myself and built myself to be a better partner.
Steph you hit the nail on the head. It’s just people getting defensive over their plot in life and it’s on both sides tbh. I think we all feel disappointed in some area of our lives and seek validation so it’s understandable but the lack of self awareness in full grown people is astounding sometimes 😂
The real problem .is that in this society wht people are so afraid of not being in the majority. As the projection of this country demographic is wht will be the new minority. .1 reason for the over turn of roe v wade. So for a young fertile WW to not want to contribute to the cause . Brings out the rath , and anger of this group . Who already think they are being replaced..
Men assume that if you are happily single that you are sleeping around which is a lie,the red pill stuff is so toxic.Why can’t we let ppl live their life and make their own choices we are not here to please society we are living our own lives
Matt Walsh has a video out complaining that not enough white children are being born. He is not upset about women being single with no children. He is upset that white woman are not bringing forth white fruit. He said it blatantly in a video.
Hi Yasmeen, miss seeing you over at Chrissies page :)
@@rosella3966
I still support her and love her channel, I just don't comment anymore ☺.
@@C12341
Exactly. A lot of WS claim to be Christian.
BOYCE WATKINS FEELS THE SAME WAY ABOUT BLACK WOMEN/CHILDREN
@@C12341 It's not bizarre. Paul in the Bible was upset that his own people were rejecting the Gospel message. By your reasoning, you'd think he would be content that a number of gentiles at least were listening. Humans in general have an inward desire for the greater good of their own people. You see this all the time with black people, Hispanics, etc, but for some reason, white people are expected to not care about their own and not advocate for their own interests like everyone else. Now that is bizarre.
A few notes:
*I didn't go into detail about the woman who was hit while walking down the street because honestly, the situation and conversation around it are equally horrifying and absurd. When I say "I'm not interested in" the additional details about her story, I mean that I want to avoid any justifications for her attack as I feel it is in no way justifiable.
*The Mila and Ashton saga is a WILD RIDE and when I recorded this, I had not gone down the rabbit hole. I have since, and yeah...it's a mess beyond belief.
*I believe very strongly that my wig is preying on my downfall. She NEVER looks like this before filming. She's usually well behaved and maybe we've just reached our point of separation. Anyway, she's plotting against me and WILL be dealt with. Thanks for watching :)
I feel that the issue of violence against blk women is a topic worthy of being discussed; however, this brickgate story is not the foundation from which to have it. The young lady appears to be a scammer that often attempts to use victimhood to raise money.
Thank you so much for clearly and eloquently expressing the nuance to this topic. People don't want to see how complex things can be for women. And too many men are allowing themselves to get caught up into this internet mindset with a narrow and extreme view that they call 'modern women' which isn't helping. We're women trying to make the most of our lives, with a man and without. Just because you're single doesn't mean you hate men, but life shouldn't stop either.
Society has a tendency to save women from the consequences of their poor life decisions.
If women, en masse, choose to be single and childless, when they reach their golden years, and their mental acuity and physical health begins to decline, who will be their primary caretakers? Typically, that would be her spouse and or children, but who are single childless women going to rely on?
@@dkt4377 @dkt4377 I believe you came to my comment with preconceived notions, or ill intentions or a lil' of both. I'm for women making the most out of, and enjoying their life whether it's with a man or not. Women are actively dealing with the consequences of their actions and their circumstances because that's what we do, carry on. All we can control is ourselves.
And that concern of being cared for in old age is one for everyone. Single childless men and women, but also parents. Kids aren't your guaranteed caretaker. Maybe it's different in other countries, but in the US it's not a sure thing. Not to say it doesn't happen, but it's best to set things up as much as you can. And even then, nothing is guaranteed to go to plan.
@@candyDander The proliferation of contraceptives, especially "the pill," in 1959, led to the sexual liberation (free sex) movement in the 1960s. Women began to have extremely high rates of premarital sex. In the 1970s, the rates of single unwed mothers skyrocketed. Then, in order to help women deal with the poverty resulting from having large numbers of children that they couldn't afford to have, we as a society created costly social welfare programs such as section 8 housing assistance, food stamps, cash assistance, travel vouchers... etc to help women deal with the consequences of not marring before they carried.
Men are accustomed to being held accountable. If men make poor life choices that lead to poverty and destitution, we face homelessness. This is why 75-95% of homeless are men. However, women can escape homelessness by simply getting pregnant, in which case, the previously mentioned social welfare programs will conspire to save them from their poor life decisions.
If women don't have a plan for who will care for them as old age sets in, we may have to install another costly social safety net of government funded caretakers to save elderly women, which will come out of my pocket in the form of taxes.
@@candyDander if women were controlling themselves, they wouldn't have started producing nearly half of their children as illegitimate kids and unwed mothers.
woman : is happy and content without hurting or disturbing anyone ☺
men: And I took that personal 😡😡😡😡😡😡
We live in a deeply and undeniably natalist society. In the scope of human history, these conversations about being childfree are entirely new, yet natalists want childfree people to shut up about their choices/experiences. That's because these discussions potentially threaten the supply of free labor that women have always provided to men and society, simply due to the fact that they were never given a choice in the matter throughout history, And if we're honest, many women don't want other women to have access to choices that they themselves didn't have or weren't aware of.
Interesting note. I don’t know too much about the history or impact of natalism, but I would never think to link it back to economics, how sad.
You have been sold a lie, instead of working for yourself. Starting a family, having kids, grand children. Taking care of things, which again and again research has shown that the happiest thing a women could be doing is to start a family. Give a life, a woman is emotional being, who loves to nurture and take care of her family.
But feminism has turned the tables, it sold you lies. So now instead of working for yourself. You work for the government. It's oppression when you husband asks you for to cook a meal. But when you boss screams at you for doing a bad job its called empowerment because your working.
You call it free labor and oppression when you help around the house and take care of the family. But it's empowering to work half your life for a boss, while spending a good amount on taxes.
@@emersyn444 Feminism has turned the tables, it sold women lies. So now instead of working for yourself. You work for the government. It's oppression when you husband asks you to cook a meal for him. But when you boss screams at you for doing a bad job its called empowerment because your working.
She calls it free labor and oppression when you help around the house and take care of the family. But it's empowering to work half your life for a boss, while spending a good amount on taxes.. Not being able to start your own life..
Bingo!
Pro-natalism runs so deep in our country😭
I love every wig she comes on her page with ❤. Also the ending line was gold “Your just paying rent by yourself.” Tell it sis. And it’s HARD
I just finished reading Sula, and this reminds me of that. Lord, how they celebrated when she died smh. I don’t know what “traditional” marrying age is these days, but is 29 late? Like, she’s about to go through her first Saturn return, is that late? And for that man’s ego to be so fragile that someone being happily single negates him being happily married, sheesh!😅
Single, childless people fund the US Tax system.
We fund the childcare credit
We fund FSA/HSA
We fund all y’all little tax refunds
Your.Welcome
Off topic, but in your last video near the end, you talked about how you dislike femininity content in part because of how your expression of femininity was received in the past, but does that mean you've been discouraged from being feminine, or that people were telling you to be more feminine? That might make for an interesting video to hear your perspective. 👍
Thank you so much for this. I found your points on "Singleness is a reflection of your Community" very interesting. It certainly does apply to me because for a very long time I couldn't find a partner that is compatible.
I've dated enough to know that I wasn't compatible even with my former partner. Eventually I realized that the way I view life and the things I value are different from my community.
I did at some point start to feel like I'll never find a compatible partner but I also realized that I can also take advantage of the time I have alone to learn, to grow and experience positive things in from life. If it's meant to be it will happen.
The problem is that she is attractive and still young. I think if she didn’t meet society’s standards of attractiveness and she were 10-15 years older, she’d probably still get comments, but not anger and rage.
At this point, call me selfish. I don’t care! I’ll do what favours me and won’t ever settle on whatever😂
It is what it is🤷🏿♀️
Steph, you said you understand why people have a problem with single women. I don't. Why do you think they have a problem with single women? I didn't really get a POV from you on that in this video.
People tend to pathologize people who prefer to be alone.
miserable people hate happy people
Most women would chose marriage over dating and most men chose dating over marriage so we are at an impasse. Single-ness is the result. I suggest women stay off Tok Tok, don’t let these people see into your life.
I could be wrong but I can’t think of one video where a woman clowns a man for being single and having a dog and a house.
Black men are always saying that we’re going to die alone because we’re single women.
I'm so glad about those Stop Having Kids billboards 🙌
They hate the power that we have!💁🏽♀️✨️
What power, exactly? Without us men providing the many layers of protection and support that we do, women would not survive.
Your voice is so soothing! I also appreciate your thoughtfulness. Your perspective is always unique - you think about things from a different level. I never thought about social infertility - I’ve definitely experienced that all my years thus far. Hopefully I can find a community suited for me.
I feel that some people who are married and have children envy single childless people. Especially the single ones who are happy about it. I'm 24, single, so happy, and I don't plan on getting married anytime soon.
People need to realize that having children and getting married are a lot of work. Stress that some of us don't want right now. Like you mentioned sometimes people are single because of the options or lack of options that they have. That's totally fine because they don't want to settle just to say that they have a partner and children. Just because someone is a human doesn't need that they should be in a relationship.
Glad she took the opportunity to turn this into something good.
I'm also 29 and single and childless. Spent alot of my life feeling unchosen and sure that'll continue 😂.
But I've also always enjoyed my solitude and being able to do my hobbies without people around. 🤷♀️
The most brilliant and celebrated men in history acted the same way, and I tjink because of that we have more acceptance when men decide to take this path. Now with women taking on more roles that were exclusive to men, I think it makes sense that maybe we will have more women who invent things in their basements after spending months in focused solitude 😂🤷♀️.
Weird thought, but it seems like people are very uncomfortable with women being "losers". Them acting in the ways that would have guys labelled as such. If they do it it's still portrayed as them being an attractive woman. And that also ties into the manic pixie girl trope.
A woman who is undesired is invisible and non existent. That's the impression I'm getting from society as a whole.
I'm 33 and been with my boyfriend since age 26. Before him I've always been single. For some reason this irked people. As if I was not allowed to be young single and happy. I noticed now people treat me alot better. Like I'm more acceptable. Does matter if I'm happy or not as long as I'm not single people are ok smh