0:00 Oh No! - Marina And The Diamonds 2:57 Top Of My School - Katherine Lynn-rose ft. Joshua Turcher 5:34 Are You Satisfied? - Marina And The Diamonds 8:52 I Can't Handle Change - Roar 12:10 Brutal - Olivia Rodrigo 14:35 Better Than Me - The Brobecks 19:00 I'll die anyway - girl in red
there is one thing you can`t forget it ..the pain that comes fom studying have end ..but your success and your Study certificate are endless!! your success and your hard work results will stay with you forever bestii!! love you and hope you`re okay 😄💙💙
You know whats the best about being a burned out gifted kid? The fact that you literally cannot study but you're a perfectionist at the same time. I love my life :DDD
It's so fucking hard explaining to your parents that you can't be the best anymore bc u fell like u're gonna give up on everything while being the "gifted" kid..
God I f***ing hate being gifted, it's so hard to come up with answers for people who ask questions like "what's it like to be gifted" and/or "can you do my homework". It's worse when you're gifted in multiple subjects I had the weirdest gifted program at my old school, they'd packed us up on a bus and ship us off to another school. I hit my metaphorical wall in 3 grade and my grades hit the fan sprinkled with some bullying on the side made for a deadly combo
My parents literally hold the fact that I'm the "gifted" kid against me. I have to be the best. The best grades. Top of my class. All the extra activities. Everything
My dad asked me today why i dont smile anymore. My mum is constantly asking me why im quiet. . Im stressed about grades . Im stressed about math . I lost all my friends . Im the bad guy . Im constantly overwhelmed with these thoughts that tell me im usless and why do i exist. . My concentration isnt good cuz im constantly worried about my future. . I have a constant thought in the bacl of my mind that everyone hates me. . Im the good child i cant vape,smoke but the stress of being the smart sibling is stressful . I never feel like myself . Im alway tierd and falling asleep in class.
Hey, idk if this helps or not, maybe im a bit late but my advice is to try get enough sleep everynight, that helps for me, drinking water helps w/ that!! Give yourself a routine for the morning, set an alarm(e.g 7am) as that also helps alot!! Try and say no to people if they ask for your help, it puts more stress on your shoulders if you say yes im a gifted kid who's dropped and rose back up, that's what I'd reccommend.
Finally a playlist that understands that gifted kids also have brunouts and just because we are gifted does mean we are different i remember if i failed people used to make me feel like crap now I have anxiety it gets triggered when i do a small mistake
Im sorry to hear about that I cant feel your pain tho bcus im not gifted at all,no really all i am only talented in pixel art. P I X E L A R T Dude i cant even make a 2 second animation without my hands burning.
i’m the exact same. i feel like sometimes it’s just inevitable for gifted kids to experience a dramatic downfall at some point in their lives. burnout sucks so bad and even more when nobody takes you seriously and thinks you just got “lazy”. i can’t even sleep every night because of the many regrets I have about my school life just rushing into my head after dark.
brutal hits hard to home for me, im sick of being young. no one takes my word when im right. im definitely getting gifted burnout right now. not a teenage dream anymore edit: why tf are people liking this comment lmao???
I relate about the no one believing you. Not even my family does, so I look up what we were arguing about and I'm almost always right, but them I'm told I have a problem for looking it up and being right, but then told "I thOuGHt YoU HaD a PhOtOgRaPhIc MeMoRy" and "Haha stupid" when I'm wrong. I hope people have started believing you, though
i totally burnt out two years ago. i used to be an A+ student in all the gifted classes and i hated it. i got really stressed and felt like if it wasn’t perfect there’s no point in doing it. i’d been getting Fs and stuff but now i’m an A B and sometimes C student. i’m now realizing i had no idea who i was back then but now i have a personality wowow amazing im not an A+ uwu girl anymore HAHAHAHHSHAUZNZJ
samee!! I got straight A's the entirety of my 6th grade year, but each year my grades just get lower and lower. I actually failed a class this year. I'm starting 10tn grade in August, wish me luck lmfao
@@ebitodhe2840 hey don't pressure your self to much :( to much pressure got to me to get burn our it was one of a lot of reasons :((i did the exact smae thing grades are a poirty of mine. and now they are only getting worse :((
what's it called when you never learnt how to actually study cuz you always knew what to do when you were younger but now that you don't know what to do and suck at studying since you never had to and still have a fear of your teachers because of your primary teacher being her. I think I ran out of my gifts lol.
thats the gifted kid phenomenon, not officially called that but imma call it that. Gifted Kids are special needs kids, we know everything young and if we dont learn how to study out of fun or interest we'll fail later in life, atleast in school. Not because we're dumb, but because we never learned how to properly study and now that we need to push so much knowledge into our heads in inhuman speeds we're falling behind. I'm lucky enough myself to have learned how learning works out of interest. Learning is a thing to be learned and mastered, if you don't then you will face the consequences. And ppl like us? We don't, why would we we knew everything from young on, hope youre doing good bud
I had a burnout in the pandemic, I had my lowest grades ever and my parents just thought I was "lazy", felling better now but still trying 2 be perfect (just surprises me how much people think I'm ""perfect"" and ""smart"" and how much they hate when I'm not what I was supposed to be
The pandemic really hit me hard as well. I worked even harder in the first year but then i pushed myself too much in the second year until I finally broke and couldn’t get back up on my feet. Now, all people could ever say to me is about how I used to be so perfect and I let it go because I got lazy. I hate that word so much. I feel so misunderstood every time my parents say that to me but I can never say anything back.
Honestly ngl I want to be a workaholic (I thrive off academic validation) and be secluded (being selfish for myself) but I am scared to be in the stage of burnout for my HSC's which is in around a little over two years. (HSC is just a huge exam for you to open doors and opportunities for Uni )
I used to be what people would consider a gifted kid but I never gave myself a break and it got to the point that I started failing my classes because I was so worn out i was falling asleep in class, or when I was studying. Now I'm what people would consider a failure, because I just gave up trying to please everyone when I knew I couldn't even when I tried my hardest
This is just like my story after i gave up of being like how people wanted me my mom just called me a disappointment and started talking after my back and stuf like that but in a weird advantage i didn't care that people made fun of me to after what she did and I still dont care at all and I actually become a happy person and i started leaving my life with a new me but I still am not sure if this is for real who I am
Gifted or not, burnout sucks And I understand what you're going through The expectations just pile up until you break And then everyone's disappointed in you and then it all just spirals into a dark hole that seems impossible to get out of ...but just know that there will always be someone to help you out everything will be better life will get better its okay to make mistakes, to fall down. you still deserve to live
I legit cried bcs of your comment, I just got scolded by my dad forgetting a 6 out of 20 and just had 3 tests tday and one was a math test that I totally failed I'm cutting, smoking and crying whenever I can fr it's horrible
Tbh, there’s not many people who actually can help a gifted burnout, even less for a simple burnout There’s probably no one in many people’s lives who can or will help. Even if there is sometimes people are just so scared of people knowing that they’re a burnout
Okay so "Are you satisfied" has always resonated with me, the beginning lyric is "I was pulling out my hair, the day I cut the deal, chemically calm. Was I meant to feel happy that my life was about to change?" I have trichotillomania, I can no longer keep long hair and it got so much worse with online school and trying to uphold what my large family knows me as. It's a huge comfort to have a song that, although isn't about trich, mentions something I strongly relate to. I also had severe panic and anxiety attacks due to large changes in my life, even if it were for the better. Ive gotten better but at this point its only because I dissociate into my own world to cope.
I understand I have anxiety attacks but they used to be so bad I would pull clumps of hair out before I got on meds but dissociating just keeps me from feeling to me much and hurting others this is mental health now but I know you can get better every one can it is possible ❤️
Hey, I also have trichotillomania. I don't rip out my hair, I rip my eyelashes. Not sure how that started but I understand. You aren't alone ok?? I'm here if you ever need to talk
I'm not really sure how I ended up on this video, but hearing the music and seeing what you kids write in the comments compelled me to write this. Full disclosure first of all: I'm 34 now, but a generation ago I was one of those gifted kids. The expectations from home started in my early teens, and were never stated outright but were incredibly heavily implied, amplified further by the pressure I put myself under. A gifted program in my country's equivalent of high school was followed by a STEM degree, which in turn was followed by an international career. Rarely was this ever complemented with hobbies or a functioning social life to any extent. My career is slowly winding down now, and it feels like waking up from a strange dream, feeling disoriented and hollow. The whole thing only felt rewarding fleetingly, from time to time. Only now do I start to notice how socially quirky I am even at my age, due to sheer lack of practice during my formative years. I can't begin to list all the small, tiny things I feel like I've missed out on, and what did I really get in return? I'm a very frugal person, and while the savings I've built up will enable me to retire early, I could easily have done the same working any other job. It would have taken me a handful more years, is all. I've gone over it in my mind, but I can't think of a single material thing to buy with all that money which would bring me any amount of happiness. The sad adult in me does not want or need a goddamn Tesla, but the stunted, interrupted teenager still inside me somewhere wants all those years back. My inner child wants to do normal teen things: Play soccer, try to learn the guitar or to draw, send silly messages to the girlfriend I never got to have, write awful fanfiction (is that still a thing?), sneak out late to hang with friends. I don't get a do-over though. There is no such thing, and all I can do now is struggle to regain some sense of meaning in what's left of my life. By some miracle, I did find someone to marry at the end of my twenties who could put up with all of my mental quirks, and our daughter was born a few months ago. It's through her that I found strength again and why I'm still on this planet to be completely honest. One resolution I have made, of course, is never to push her. I will teach her things, of course, and help her if she struggles, naturally. But never push her. She will not have to go through the same thing I went through, and as long as she's happy, she will have succeeded in my eyes. As for my fortune? It's hers, but she doesn't know it yet. I don't spend it to any extent that it shows and I won't tell her about it until she's old enough to handle it responsibly, at which point I plan to just give it all to her as a surprise. That is actually a moment I do look forward to, giving her the surprise of a lifetime. As for what to do with myself now, I don't know. I just don't know. The point I want to make is this: If parents or other adults in your lives try to push you by "speaking from experience", show them this text I wrote since my experience also must hold some weight. I put in the hours, got the grades, got the awards, got the degrees, got the money, and who am I now? I'm an empty husk of a man, inside of which is a boy who never got to just be a boy. I did everything asked of me and the end result is that I don't want to live anymore. "Are you satisfied with an average life?" I don't really know since I never got to try, but I'm pretty sure I would have been. It would beat waiting in vain for the happiness to finally start, for this reward at the finish line I was always told would be here. Well, where is it? What was all of this for in the end? Stay safe out there, all of you. Do what feels right, and whatever you aspire to do, don't lose yourselves while doing it. The least I can do is try to prevent other people from feeling the way I do now.
I used to have the entire lyrics of Oh No! memorized, and not only memorized, internalized. The song spoke the only reason for my existence: to succeed. Ever since I was little I had been ahead of my grade, and started questioning my existence at the age of 7. When I did this, I turned to the only thing I knew, school. I spent all my time, energy, free time, everything on school. It paid off, I scored high, and I did well. I got easily used to being the best in my class. As the grades, moved on, this became more stressful, and the sense of accomplishment I felt from it faded. I encountered someone who was better than me in certain topics when I moved in the 4th grade, and it sent me off the rails. I couldn't think about anything besides beating her, and being the best again. It was the hardest I ever had to work on something school related, and somehow even when I did better than her, she was given more credit. She didn't deserve it, but what would people have thought if I ever said that? There was an unspoken competition between us, and it destroyed me. I even tried to beat her in things not school related. I spent an entire summer training so I could be faster than her, I read constantly so I would be the most loved in the library. I soon became known as a try hard, a book worm, and a socially inexperienced but book smart bitch. I wanted to be the best so bad. I could've been more popular, I could've had more friends, but instead I focused on being the best. The most satisfied feeling I've ever gotten was beating that redhead in a county wide essay competition. My essay won, not hers. I went to middle school, and eventually moved to Colorado. Where I moved to didn't have a gifted program with more extreme classes, and the curriculum was much less difficult than what I had faced at my old school, so I was back at the top. Within a week, the math teacher dubbed me an in-class tutor, and my other classes were also going well. There was one kid I couldn't seem to beat. Anyways, he's now my boyfriend. I've told many people, who've given me the response, "Naturally." Now he rants to me about how hard it is, how difficult it is, and how hard it's hurt him. I normally feel or have felt many of the ways he explains, but before I can give him someone to relate to, he compares. "You've never had to..." and so on. It hurts, but who am I to ever say something while he's speaking about his issues? Then I'd be an attention seeking bitch wo won't let people vent, not even her boyfriend. So now, anytime I feel the ways I DESERVE to feel, because of the shit I've gone through, the stress, the family issues, the competitive tendencies, the purpose of being the best that I have yet to fill once again, I feel guilty. Like I don't deserve to. I used to listen to Oh No! to give me motivation and a sense of meaning. Now I can't listen to it without feeling like I'm trying to be someone else for attention. But it's not for attention. My feelings are real. I am real. I'm my own person who relates to others without speaking. I am my own person, and I'm allowed to feel this way. But I can't convince myself that's true, no matter how much it is. And now I'm the burnt out and lazy picture they've all painted out for me. I've been lied to and deceived about my own being, my own personality. I want to be the way I was. I deserve this. I'm real. I'm my own. Hear me, someone, please.. Thank you for reading my own little rant, I'm sorry to vent here, but I don't know where else to. Love you all, you are so amazing, and fellow gifted kids have given me some of the best times of my life.
This was a very underrated and relatable comment (except for the bf part I’ll b single forever 🥲) I always feel the expectations rising no matter how much time and effort I put into something, it feels like nothing and I only feel good if I get recognized for something ITS SO HARD TO BE “GIFTED”
I had the reading age of 18 at 8. I got all A*'s in school, teachers yell at me if i slip, my parents yell at me if i mess up, its literally so stressful. I just want to have lower expectations
I was reading 400-500+ page books at the same age and my mother had enrolled me in a gifted school with high expectations and I failed out the expectations got way too high for me
My reading level was a 13.9 (that means better than most college students) and I still am but burnout has led to me always forgetting to turn in the work I spent hours on and I always get yelled at for it. And I know that “this isn’t the answer” but tbh there isn’t one. You live day to day pretending to be happy until you die so why not cut ig off early. Last chance to change my mind will be on 03/03/2035 just in case someone cares
"The pressure is literally killng me" I want to say that to my parents because they only care about my grades instead of me , my health , and my mental health
the feeling when you put your entire self worth in grades and then everything starts falling apart and the grades stop goving you any sprt of gratification but you've sacrificed too much to turn back now and everyone you know is disappointed in you because of it lol
The moon was playing tricks on me, hiding behind the pale clouds. I inhaled the cigarette smoke and the salt taste of tears, drying up. The sounds of the party behind my back sounded muffled and distant. I shifted my weight slightly, careful not to slide off the sleek roof. It’s not that I really cared if I did. The night was warm but suddenly I felt chills running up and down my bare arms. Coming here was a bad idea. Wearing this stupid black dress, with a stupid hope that someone might notice me, was even a worth one. I tugged my leather jacket. It was ridiculously small and not warming. The sharp sound behind me made me stir. I almost spilled the beer I was holding in my left hand, I as I whirled my head back. In the dark I could only distinguish the tall silhouette of someone, climbing over the open window, straight onto the roof. “Oh shit!” He tripped and grabbed to the closest thing to him. Which happened to be me. A jolt shot through me, as I recognized the pale eyes staring in mine. “You?” “You?” “Mind if I sit here?” “Well, that’s not my house, so…” He was not the one I wore my fancy dress for. How do you behave with the best friend of your crush who you happen to despise in class and out of it because he is the arrogant jerk? “Right.” He fell next to me; his long legs clad in black jeans brushing mine. I decidedly didn’t move an inch. He held a drink in his hands. “What are you doing up here?” “Uhm,” I hurried to kill off the cigarette. “Don’t worry, Straight-A, I’m not telling your mom and dad.” Even in the dark I could hear his smirk. He took a sip of his drink. “In fact, do you have one for me?” “I…,” I frowned into the darkness. “Mmm, yes. Yes, I do.” I fished out a pack in the pocket of my jacket and handed to him. I wasn’t going to bring the lighter to his lips. “Thanks.” He took a cigarette between his long fingers and a lighter from me. For a moment I was transfixed by his movements, as if he was Prometheus, bringing a gift to earth. I cleared my throat and looked away, back at the moon, that was still hiding. “Don’t you get tired of it?” He suddenly asked. His voice a little raspy. “What?” “Of trying to be perfect. All the time.” I stared at his profile in the dark. Coming from him, it sounded so ridiculous. He was the one, who always tried to best me at everything in class. He was the one who took away my scholarship last year, this much I knew. “What are you talking about?” “Well, to be honest, I’m terribly drunk.” He laughed and looked back at me, dimples, and all. A lock of black hair fell across his forehead as if he stepped down from a magazine cover. “And when I’m drunk I become honest.” I took a deep breath. Actually, I could smell the alcohol on his breath. And if I was wise, I would have shifted away from him, instead of getting all tingly from how out thighs touched. But I was never wise. “Really?” He was no longer looking at me, rather focusing on the moon. And I wanted to change it. “Tell me one honest thing.” That brough me back his attention. He smelled of expensive cologne and leather and money. Of success without effort. Of bets always won, of card always falling in his favor, of silver spoons and summer homes and trust fund money. “You look really pretty tonight,” he said then. “I keep seeing you in my sleep. And sometimes I want to put my hands under your shirt so badly I must dig my nails into the palms of my hands till they bleed. How's that for honesty?” P.S. If you'd like, you can find me on Wattpad by @trust_me_I_lie
((partial tw!!)) Ahh i havent vented in one of these comment sections or really to anyone in general in forever. I guess lately things have been getting rough again. I can do it, i know i can. Like my parents have told me for forever, "youre kind, smart, talented. Dont put it to waste." So what have i grown into? A people pleaser that now just finished their sophomore year of highschool with their lowest grade being a 91. Im getting tired but i know i can keep going. Only two more years left and set out plans for the future. I can get there, i know i can. Can i really see myself surviving next year? not exactly. But seeing the smiles on my amazing boyfriend, younger siblings, parents and friends faces when i succeed is worth it. The support has been dwindling over the years but its alright, things will turn out in the end. Is most of this the toxic positivity ive forced on myself speaking? Yeah, probably but it makes everyone else happy. Ive been averaging 2-3 hours of sleep a night and about 1 or 2 meals a day on good days. Just taking it a day at a time though. If youve read through all this thank you stranger, i love you and want you to know i am so proud of you for making it this far. We've got this and theres only a bit longer then we'll all be free. Its gonna turn out alright
I don't know if this reply is overstepping any boundaries, so feel free to ignore this. I just wanted to say that as a fellow (former) gifted kid I also used to destroy myself for the expectations of my parents, my teachers and even my friends, and while everyone's experience is different, believe me when I say I've been there. please don't take this as me telling you what to do, but depriving yourself of a healthy body and psyche is not the way to go. it's alright to mess up, and it's alright to be average or even below average. appeasing expectations is something that many children are taught is a good thing, a necessary thing even, and that fucks with us a lot. it's great to see that you have a positive outlook (or at least a mantra to tell yourself when things aren't looking so positive) but that's only half the battle. what counts is that you don't let yourself be ruined by a system that doesn't support you adequately, and I know that's really hard, but Please, take breaks and look after yourself. your health should always come first, and definitely above the expectations of people who are failing to keep you safe and healthy. I just got done with my second try of my final year of high school. last year I dropped out because of mental health reasons, and after the summer I reasoned with myself that, as long as I take it slow and don't fall back into toxic behavioral patterns, giving it another go wouldn't hurt. it did hurt. I failed and did not graduate. but more importantly I had what probably was the worst mental health low I've ever had. I'm currently not in a good place, but if all of this has taught me something it's that school is just not worth it. sure education is important, but your life is so much more important than that. yadda yadda, preachy rant over. again this is not meant to convince you of anything, it's maybe just another perspective to consider. no matter what you choose to do in the future I hope you make that choice for yourself, not for others. and just as you said, you'll get through this one way or another. I wish you lots of luck on your journey :)
Sorry if this seems lecture-y, I just wanted to add my two-cents in because this is exactly where I was sophomore year. 2 years is a long time to wait for salvation. Especially when the salvation you expect doesn’t even exist. College isn’t some magical fix-all for Al the unhealthy habits you’ve built in your life up until now. Burnout at 17 is a real thing, and man does it hit hard. For me, I was applying for colleges at 17. Applying for scholarships. Applying with straight As, 5 AP courses, several extracurricular activities, volunteering, whatever. And the sinking realization hits, that you don’t get into all the schools you want. You get little if any in scholarships. What all happened to the last 12 years spent laboring in school? And the slippery slope to the bottom starts. Never have I ever felt so out of control of my life. My health was failing, my grades, I hated things I used to love. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why. End of senior year I got hit with 3 infections at once and ended up in the hospital.Honestly, given how shit my sleep and eating patterns were at the time, I’m lucky that that was the worst. Escaped high school with utter burn out and, what I thought at the time, to be an embarrassingly low senior year. The mend, the healing from burn out starts when you want it to. It’s slow to break these habits. If they’re so self destructive, one would think them easy to break. But it’s not so. Still, once you start getting enough sleep, eating better, valuing friends, hobbies, passions, life gets better. Take care of your mental health, see a professional if you can. Take breaks when you need them. Enjoy the fullest life has to offer when you have the energy to face the day with your all.
Hey, I finally took the chance to look back at this and completely forgot I’d posted it 😅 but thank you so much, I figured I owed enough for you taking time out of your day to atleast give a lil update. I know im still far from perfect and maybe okay but im working on getting there, im starting to act and dress how I want and have cut off people that haven’t been the best for me. Im not putting in countless hours into just passing in school anymore and quite honestly stopped caring about the pressures put on by others. Im going to be able to graduate my senior year early and am putting myself and my happiness first this year. I can’t wait to be done with it and finally get out of here. There’s no way I’d go back to school once im finished with next year. But I’ve found my people that make life worth living and not just existing for the praise. I know im still far from being “okay” in any sense but im the closest I’ve been in years
I never wanted to be in gifted classes, although my parents wish me to be, and I'm aware that I'm losing my "special touch" and they're disappointed in it. I, am a "slow burning fuse", about to explode any second. It appears that we all seem to be slowly going insane at our own expectations, the standards. I am currently studying hard in the middle of summer to apply for a " well-known highschool " for intelligent students, and I deeply apologize for ranting as this is usually an undesired trait that most don't like. It seems that not all of us are so different... The thing is that the only reason that I was driven to succeed in every academic program, is gone. And I am slowly withering away from every comment that asks to do better, to try harder. We all overwork ourselves, and my way of escaping this reality for temporary, is to engulf myself in romance fanfictions because I can't get any love just staying inside the books. I just hope that everyone goes out of their own hellholes.
Hey take it slowly trust me it's all going to work out take a break from time to time and not a tiktok break or something go out see cities and people and imagine urself in the future where would u want to be between them and work for it not too much just do what's enough and trust me it would all be sorted out somehow
I had advanced math for as far as I can remember. It started hitting my really hard the past few years due to the pandemic and having a new school. Once I had an F most of 6th grade year, they still kept me in but, made me go up one math grade instead. I was a 7th grader learning 9th grade math last school year (Which ended for me around 3-4 weeks ago). None of my family knew about the math I was learning so, it felt like an endless pit of dark moments. All my friends weren't in honors and thought it was a dream. It doesn't feel like that to me. I've gotten better grades 7th grade than 6th but it makes me want to breakdown whenever I see a worksheet of math. If you've gone through the same thing, I just want to let you know you aren't alone. I'm with you. Just try your best to hold on and it will all pay off. Thank you for reading this passage. :)
Used to be a gifted kid, but totally burnt out because my father never have hope in me. He always say that if I fail I will lose a lot of things and that he will even kick me out of the house. I felt so pressured to the point I no longer care about my study nor myself. It sucks.
*I loved this as soon as I heard Top Of My School* I really struggle with having a traditional family, that essentially believes that we should always be the best, but they can't understand burnout. I remember telling my mom that I got writers block, and that I would just enter the writing contest next year, and she blew up on me. So I heavily relate to this playlist.
i don't get high expectations from my parents as i used to. they say they understand that what i study is difficult, and that i shouldn't put pressure on myself, that i shouldn't kill myself trying to be on top of the class like i used to. but it's been so long since i felt "free" from pressure that i'm so used to the intense anxious feeling of trying to be the best. though, i don't think i was ever the "best". so now to compensate for the expectations i don't believe i ever met, i work harder and harder and harder. it's so sickening how they tell me to chill out, how they tell me that i am doing good enough, when i, myself, don't even feel like i am good enough.
When I took my math exam, I got a three out of four. I got a four on everything and I told my family member and said, “It’s okay right? I’ll do better next time” to which they responded with “That’s really how you think of it? What if there was no next time. See the problem”
Me: having good grades School: switches to standard reference grading (grading on a scale from 1-4) Me: feels like my grades are bad because I’m getting 1-3s Me: burning out trying to get my grades to all 3s. Me: staying up til late at night getting my homework done while also doing extra activities to get scholarships. Me: depressed, su!cidal, insane, mad. People forget that the gifted are tired. It’s hard to keep crap up. And people think we’re dramatic or selfish when we’re sad about getting one grade lower, but it’s because we’re pressured to be the best, pressured to keep our grades up. “Don’t settle for second best” they say. It sucks. We’re tired.
i'm in 10th grade and struggling to keep my grades up. every now and then when i have a PILE of assignments to do, I'll do all of them because of my fear of failure. i feel as though i've almost reached my breaking point. i'm so thankful that its finally summer break. i finally have time to recover from this school year. though i'm worried that next year is gonna tear me down, and the stress is gonna drown me. i'm scared that my sanity is gonna come down with me. i'm so tired of being the "gifted kid". i just wanna be normal and have lower expectations.
is your 10th grade over? You just feel wronged. don't you? because i do too why did they paint false dreams of becoming something so big in future to a little kid? i swear i don't even try to do something to make them them expect anything from me. But they always find some false glitter in me and i just say to myself " you'll regret everything when you find out who i really am at the end". I hope life starts going a little easy on us. ffs i can't handle it any longer.
[VENT WARNING] People, especially my family, always said that I'm very talented. I learned how to read myself, could pretty much communicate in English (not my native language) when other people from my class couldn't even make easy sentences (some still can't-), never had to go to bonus classes (it's propably called another way...anyway xD) etc. etc. This year I got a first B on my report card, because I pretty much suck at geography...and I'm just not interested at all in this thing, it BORES me when I have to learn it =.= And, well, considering few years ago I almost started crying in school out of fear & disappointment, 'cause I got my 1st C from a test, I propably was really hard on myself for this. Well the thing is I didn't. It was my parents actually. It feels like I was to them just a perfect student since I started school & now their perfect machine got broken. Like the only way to fix it is to remind it every damn time it brings a good grade, that they suck at that one thing. I know it's supposed to be an encouragment, but it's like they totally forget who their kid is - the person who was TERRIFIED of telling them they got a FREAKING C. It doesn't work as encouragment for me, it works opposite way actually. Makes me feel never enough for them and stuff. I know myself that I was never talented, it is just easy for me to learn easy stuff & easier to learn hard stuff I'm interested in - nothing more. But I'm just used to them being neutral about my grades. I always do the stuff myself; homeworks, learning for exams, projects - I can do it on my own. They pretty much never helped me with school. But when they found out I got a 1st C, they ofc started screaming at me (which led me to a little breakdown-). They knew I hate when someone screams at someone (thanks teachers), not even especially at me, I start to feel like the worst scum on the earth (though they think it's just fear and sadness). And the worst thing is that after 5 minutes they acted like nothing happened, they always do that after criticizing me and it just hurts. Like they can so easily get over something I overthink sometimes for days, something that even after years I can accidentally remember and start to feel so freaking hurt. Ok, this rambling really seems like i just want attention I better just stop writting it-
Let me put something in: YOU. DESERVE. A. CHANCE. TO. VENT. You deserve better, and if you are looking for people who understand what you're going through, you've found us. We love you, and we want to be there for you.
Straight A+'s without any help, yet here I am, breaking down every time I try to study. I feel like I let everyone down because my grades aren't as good as they were. It all feels pointless now because I'm not even allowed to get into my dream school because of my parents.
I had to skip most of the songs because I only wanted to listen to the ones I knew (idk why I always do this) but that’s besides the point. I don’t think I’m gifted and I’m not considered gifted anymore but this is helpful anyway
motivation: always moving up and down social life: 50/50 grades: consistent honor student (ONLY..?) parent support: 10/10 (thank you so much) mental math abilities: 9/10 mood: 50/50 (fg therapist + the school system's making us cram) love received and processed: 9/10 overall: i've had this desire to improve in studies and sports, but my motivation doesn't let me do so, esp with so many tasks mixing up in my schedule
My experience being a gifted burnt out kid is the fact is that I still get all A’s to “impress” my parents. To get a 4.0 GPA, I’ve been burnt out since 7th grade. I’m now a freshman. It’s not that I want good grades it’s because I’m stuck being the good child, be respectful, kind, hard working, staying on focus, having no friends to focus on school. Not being able to express myself. Good temper. not depressed, not being too lazy or eating too much, having to be responsible for all the pets even if they’re my sisters who neglected them. Regardless if it’s in person or online. I’m pretending to be a person I’m not. I just want to run away, start a new life, have a friend group, ditch school from time to time, to hangout after school, to have fun. To have an actual lover, go to thrift stores and try on stuff for fun. To have sleepovers, to do spooky shit, prank someone, run in the forest, climb big trees and fall and get hurt. To go camping, to be a free teenager, not having to worry about what others think of me. Having a best friend with me 24/7 that actually cares about me and doesn’t ditch me. Use me for venting. A guy that actually has my back. To be best pals. To steal tiny candy shit. To have a stray cat or dog, living in broken apartments, going to old libraries, using candles instead of electricity lights. To break a bone, anything to feel ALIVE. Driving to town to towns, on an adventure. To do something I was never allowed to do. being able to not worry about my mental health or my medical issues. To be an actual person rather than being a person I’m not.
I'm sorry... 🫂 Parents tend to act like our grades are the only thing in the world that ultimately matters, when life is short and there's so much more to it than numbers on a paper. The things you said you wanted to do sound really fun
I’m known as a gifted kid in my school. I pass everything without trying. But they didn’t know they gave me anxiety, and very bad mental illness because of it. Anytime I do anything wrong, it hurts hard.
Damn. Honestly being the “gifted kid” ties you down to always being the role model and having others compared to you. In a sense, I feel guilty for the insecurity of other because me being “gifted” is their expectations. I feel like I can’t breathe with how much everything is being shoved down my back because a simple B isn’t good enough and that prones me to nasty remarks and a shrug when it’s A’s. Honestly it’s just a lose lose situation :( It’s also a nightmare being teased for not getting a higher grade on tests because you’re known for acing everything perfect or not passing a subject-or not meeting those expectations.
I'm the gifted kid because I never get enough attention from people around me. It's always my siblings. Being the middle child sucks. I want to drop being the best but then I'll go back to being worthless and unworthy of people's love. I hate this. I'm just stuck.
Vent? Sorry, I'll delete if you want. I'm not called gifted by teachers, but damn. I alway hear my family calling me gifted, and to keep it up to get scholarships; I live in a low income family (single mom). And I want to keep it up but I almost failed my math class, which is a class you have to get good on to be able to pass, but was able to pull it up to an A because I took A BUNCH of extra credit shit. It stressed me out so much. I had to have my mother check my grades every night, or I would cry all night. I just want to keep my perfect image in my family's eyes. I just want to be able to help my mother so badly. I'm sorry for venting, this has been on my mind for months.
I feel this pretty well. I get outcluded because I am responsible. Sometimes my "friends" use me only to not do any work. I have to deal with teachers and people when I get a single thing wrong. I get stressed when I start getting things wrong and can't emotionally take it. Everyone sets their expectations too high. I am expected to be the perfect student. And that is only because I understand things right away and get only A+/100 when grading. People are tiring, and I don't feel comfortable with almost anyone. There are only high, like really high expectations. Nothing else. I feel really bad. But still wear the happy face, because no one actually gets it. I need a break from everyone. But I keep getting called asocial because I am inside my room.
i'm the youngest in my family and i'm the "gifted kid". bc both my older siblings couldn't reach my parents' expectations, i'm now being pressured by them since i'm their "last hope" and "smarter" than my older siblings. but i'm just burnt out, i just want to give up even drop out of school but ofc i can't do that. since my grades started dropping life has just been getting harder and harder and idk how much longer i can take it
I'm not A gifted kid but I am in special Ed and burned out. This playlist right here reminds me so much how it is, and that I have like four more years of this to do before I graduate.
I miss my old self, a child who studied beautifully, was the best, her parents loved her, enjoyed everything after the 3rd grade I'm not the same now they require more and more...
i used to get some, good grades, my parents were happy, i got a lot of praise, but since i turn into junior high schooler, my grades just, start to drop, my mental not stable ig, and i think that my parents actually mad because i'm not have a good grade again, but they cover they anger by saying "we both don't really care about those grades", and i rarely got those praises for me, in order not to disappoint my parents, i hide my grades tests so they wouldn't mad or disappointed at me
I used to be the top of my class till i hit 6th grade. I used to get good grades because the things were so easy, i didnt have to even study. But when i entered 6th grade the subjects got hard, so i needed to study. Keep in mind i didnt study all those years so i had no knowledge of studying. I used to get 99% in all but my grades dropped to 91%. Everyone expected the best from me and i hated it. I knew i wasnt good enough. I saw people get better grades than me and my heart shattered. Seeing all those people disappointed in me made me so stressed that i got constant headaches from stress. My grades arent getting better and now no one cares about me being burnt out.
I've been burnt out for a while. I used to always get above 90. On everything. I've gotten so tired of being expected to be the best or the most successful. Honestly I'm kind of glad i'm not only getting a's now. I'm not perfect like you want me to be mom, sisters, my family.
Back then i used to be “the perfect kid” respect my parents, always top in class, good attitude and a innocent christian who prayed everyday. Now my grades would either randomly go up and down, always “TalKiNg BaCk” to my parents, behind or just normal in class and having a dirty mind and rarely pray, and a bonus anger issues
I stopped feeling the want for toys or happiness to young, I was always the mature kid the one who was amazing at her school subjects. It all dropped, everything failed. My friends left me because I talked to much about certain subjects, My newer friends left me because I wouldn't talk about what I liked and when I complained about school I was the " dramatic one ". When I started Secondary school I had so many friends, amazing grades and even people who looked up to me. I now regret everything, For who am I if I don't have all those things. Let me drag you into my web of lies once more, The lies of my beliefs,personality,friends even my family relationships. Why did my cousin start to become distant?, why did she leave me again?. I showed her. I showed her myself, Not my throne placed on lies, But the 7 year old child who's crying after getting kicked out of her house because she got a 73% on a maths percentage test!. The little child who yearns to be free. How can I go back. How can I stop myself from showing her once again?. Why do they never stop?. Why can't I go on my Phone?, Oh, My grades dropped I see. 2 days without sleep. I'm the attention seeker don't worry, If I finally can quell the thirst to prove myself I'll stop. No?. Well that makes 2 of us, we both know it won't stop. This pain that is living. This torture that is expectations. This cruel thing called love. Is all really fair in love and war?, No?. I already knew that. I can still have at least a sliver of hope that the life I dream for, the person I wish to be. I can have the hope I can reach that goal. How much longer do I have to wait?. My emotions are leaving me.. That's meant to be good right!?. I can finally stop caring for them. It's not toxic I know it isn't. It's me being fooled again, except this time by myself. :).
This hit really hard, but it will get better ! I don't usually talk so it's kinda hard telling you what i really want to tell you (overthinking again..) so i'll make it short, it's already long, i really Hope it gets better and you achieve it ! Good Luck, i'm here to talk. Hope you have a better life!
The saddest thing for me is that when I was at my worst burnout, I listened to these songs on repeat all the time. After 2 years since then, I found this playlist. about 6 months ago, I had my second worst burnout. I mean, it's getting better. Time passes, you learn that you are not equal to grades, people's opinions, your parents' expectations. Sometimes you have to cut all ties to feel completely free, it's worth it. And at the end of the day you look at what you've already done, what you've already achieved. And you're worth it. But you're still more than any accomplishment. You're just an interesting, charming, intelligent person.
I've been perfect all my life and lived my parents fantasies and the second I get a A- my phone gets taken away. The urge of always being first but never appreciated for the pain and the sleep I've lost for 14 years. Yet when I want to have time for myself and have a life I get put in homeschooling because my parents say that everyone else around me is making me fail. Because I'm just not good enough for them if I fail. Try to talking to them but they are working. No friends and no socializing just working on collage in 7th grade. I have 2 degrees already and my parents don't think that's enough. Nothing I do is ever good enough. For anyone. So I start watching horror movies to make me feel numb because I'm sick and tired of the pain everyone puts me though its exhausting. I cant be suicidal because I raised my siblings older and younger. My life is falling apart and there is nothing I can do about it because I'm always there for everyone else but no ones there for me. I helped my siblings through puberty and depression and fruit ninja. I'm the middle child whenever one of my siblings get something done they are praised by my parents but after I clean the whole house, take care of the dogs, help my siblings w their homework before mine, take care of my special needs brother. Feed them. And yet my parents are on their phone arguing to their hearts content. No matter how hard I try everyone is better then me in any way. I'm blabbering but I don't care because you cant tell me to hide my emotions anymore. I had NO childhood. After getting bullied for 6 years and moving every 3 years my loneliness is so deep I'm drowning. I had an argument with my parents and I said "its my life give me a choice" and they said "actually no its not you life you have no choice." IM TRYING SO HARD TO BE HAPPY IM SO DESPERATE BUT NO BODY IS MAKING THAT POSSIBLE FOR ME. At this point I cant be in my room alone for 8 minutes for someone to come in and get mad at me for "not helping out around the house" yeah? who did the laundry, dogs, trash, dishes, tidying up, farm, give pills, and vacuum EVERY GODDAMN ROOM IN MY MF HOUSE BUT STILL IM NOT GOOD ENOUGH. Tell my parents I want to cut/dye my hair they say "you cannot do that my reputation at work would be ruined. I'm just working to pay for your collage. You need more scholarships." NO I DONT. ALL I WANT IS FOR YOU TO REALIZE THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THEN CHORES AND SUFFERING JUST LET ME BE A KID FOR ONCE IN MY FUCKING LIFE. I have scars from bullying and I feel so numb. I passed out two days ago and my parents don't care. I broke my fingers from working to hard on 9 ESSAYS FOR COLLAGE WHEN IM IN 7TH GRADE LIKE WOW NO SHIT PRESSURE WTF DO YOU MEAN. "You're exaggerating." No I'm not. "In this family we are leaders." I DONT WANT TO BE A SHITTY LEADER I JUST WANT TO FIT IN AND HAVE FRIENDS LIKE A NORMAL KID. AT THIS POINT I WISH WE WERE POOR.
I burnt out for a few months 1 grade ago, got my shit together once I got in a school whose tuition was 100k, I knew I had to do something, I had to ace it, I had to make everything perfect. I've always been a smart student, whether I put effort or not I'd do good regardless. I never put that much effort but now I'm determined, I'll obliterate this shit.
they ask me why im so negative, why i think others are better than me and i assume i dont get the perfect score. theyre also the ones who compare me to other kids, theyre also the ones who show the negative side in the good times, and always say that its sad/dissapointing that i got 19/20 Aand not one more point to get 20/20
I never EVER opened up to my bestfriends. Let alone just friends. My body is now automatically locks in any tears when I come inside my school inside my eyes. Only when I come back home, I lock my room door and scream and cry about every day. I haven’t been spotted crying in school for 5 years straight all because of my stupid confidence. Sorry for the vent -_-
Ima be honest,, I burnt myself out- For 3 years now,, I’m in middle school getting to highschool soon, whenever I get lower then A I push my self overboard. No one expects me to do my best, but I DO,, I always expect myself to be a high achiever. No matter what ever since I started middle school my grades started falling, which cause me to panic making me push myself just to on top of everyone again,, making me miserable in the process. I’m not sure why I push myself, it’s been a habit ever since I moved with my grandma and her kids/my aunt/uncle - no one’s ever stopped me nor told me to calm down which caused me to hurt my mental health and myself, of course it’s sorta my own fault. Tho ever since my grades got lower my family noticed which caused them to start pushing it on me, I’m not praised like how I was when I was younger. I get judged and notice by the single up perfect ness, or smt like that idk,,- So yea, I’m just listening to this playlist while studying at 2 am in the morningggg Yeyy-
i was six years old when my school made me get to a higher level (i’m sure you know what i mean i just don’t know how to say it in english lol) because apparently everything came too easy to me, and i already knew how to read because i learned by myself before first grade. honestly, until the 10th grade, my grades were pretty good. but i massively failed the 11th grade. i lost all motivation and all hope, i truly did not care about my life and future. i had the equivalent of F all the time (except when i cheated). I didn’t know myself anymore and felt completely worthless, because ever since i was a kid i was taught that my grades are the one thing supposed to make me happy and proud. that they are who i am. that’s bullshit. i am more than that. after a hell of a year i got the opportunity to re-do that 11th year in a different high school. this was the best thing that ever happened to me. fun fact: my beloved therapist got me to do an IQ test which confirmed my giftedness. i’m only sharing this part because i believe it helped me understand why all this was happening to me. anyways. so i got into ✨that new school✨ and i truly became a better version of me there. i got better grades. really good grades. and while that made me happy, i had other things there that made me even happier. friends, teachers, family. i was so healthier. i am still learning how to navigate in this world, but i know for sure that i am capable, i am worthy of happiness, and it gets better. please don’t give up on yourself even when you feel like it’s all over. the world keeps turning and we’re all here in this together. we got this, and we got each other. much love to everyone
Sometimes it feels like I'm not allowed to vent or feel sad because im not depressed or suicidal (even though alot of my OC's are) and i just feel this weird imposter syndrom where im not sad enough to express it because my only real difference from the average preteen girl is my ADHD and even then it's mostly maskable despite the whole burning out thing. And i found a thing i relate to and can vent to, and everyone else feels worse and i feel guilty for relating to it at all because i want to live a long and happy life and am actually kinda scared of death and its only my teachers who insist I've lost my potential and my mom has repeatedly affirmed she'll still care for me and it's more of an internal thing
I had a Burnt out two years ago, and now i thought that it was over but i guess there are some of it left in me. i get lazy when I'm class so i easily forget the topic, so whenever my dad asks me about my topic, i panic and keep trying to find the topic in my head but it won't appear so i end up not sayign anything, this continued a lot of times until my dad had enough and now he's been asking me "How the hell did you turn out like this?" and that question has been stuck in my head. Sometimes i want to vent to someone or something but i guess i keep telling myself to not do it because i shouldn't act like I'm the one who's hurting when its actually the people around me that's hurting. And whenever i wanted to ask for help or jsut for someone to listen, they just change the topic because the topic was getting heavy, of course im not going to push them, since im not a victim after all, im just being dramatic and lazy.
This playlist is perfect. I was considered gifted and then got sent to a gifted school over my summers. Ye some of it was fun but it was also torture. I never had time to hangout with my friends. I have to go to a church every single Wednesday and I have to do my homework and study before I can even touch my phone. I’m getting b’s and I feel like a failure and I’m just spiraling out of control. I can’t tell my parents or friends. And whenever I would get a bad grade or get something wrong I would get made fun of and they made me feel like shit. It’s hard. And now I have anxiety, social anxiety, depression and A.D.D. People think I’m perfect and rich when I am not. I just seem happy at school. But recently I havnt been able to get answers right and I made a mistake for a simple math problem infront of the whole class and they all laughed. I couldn’t figure out a problem in math one day and people started snickering and whispering. I’m science I kept stuttering with my answer because I was unsure and got laughed and stared at. In ELA I made a huge grammar mistake… twice. And that’s only today. And much more.. my friends are leaving me. Or atleast it feels like it because latley they don’t talk to me or hangout anymore. Or just simply ignore me. I’m burned out and no one understands except my chior teacher. She lets me take mental health days. She’s my favourite❤ More to add if you wanna read more. But I am burned out because the expectations just keep piling and piling and I’m gonna break soon. I’m breaking out because my diet is so bad and I’m so stressed people hate me for “being annoying” when I don’t talk, at all. Reading and music is my only escape. I know it’s not my friends faults but I can’t trust any one of them. And I randomly get mad at them because all my emotions are started to break out. I hate myself but I then again hate everyone else except myself. I hate being the “perfect” girl. I have gotten into trouble with the cops latley and bad grades and been making mistakes. And no one can see it’s because of the stress and burdens I have had since 1st grade. But yell at me and/or ghost me. Parents yell, teachers yell, students tell, and friends tell aswell. (Yes I mean tell not yell for the students and friends) and I recently broke up. Latley I’m a nervous reck and almost everyone I’ve liked I don’t actually LIKE I’m just desperate for some love from someone. All I do is try my best. But I can’t get even a bit of the dedication back from someone else. All they do is blame me for everything because I’m so easy to walk over. People call me a failure at school and I have to laugh at jokes and not break down crying. I am a train wreck.
I'm sorry. That sounds like... It's hard to put into words. But I'm sorry that's what you have to go through. I don't know that there are real solutions to that. It sounds cliche, but have you tried journaling? I got one for like $5 at Walgreens, and it's nice to write down your thoughts and struggles sometimes. Also, you can rip it into tiny pieces once you're done and it's really satisfying. Also, fun fact! B's aren't technically failing. My brain (and, if I had to guess, yours too) says 100% is 'yeah, I did fine' and 90% is 'might as well go die in a hole now', but it's a lie. Something else that sort of helped me is basically telling yourself that the anxiety and depression and all that are like separate entities living in your brain. So when I think 'I totally failed that test and it's going to drop my grade so much' I tell myself, 'nope, that's just your anxiety speaking'. And then you don't interact with it any more than that, because getting in a fight with your anxiety isn't something you want to do. On the other hand, that technique doesn't really work for my depression so much, because it's a lot easier to slip into that thought pattern without noticing. Also, consider getting therapy. It's usually really expensive, but if your school has some sort of counseling service, take full advantage of that. If it helps, I'll be your friend.
@@lilithreusch2614 this made me tear up, thank you for even taking the time to write that. I will have to think about buying a journal and writing it down. Also that thing with anxiety and stuff being a different entity makes a bit of sense. I appreciate that you took time out of your day to tell me this :) I’m so happy someone cares :) thank you.
i'm not gifted but i do better than most but i work maddeningly hard to be as good as i am now yet STILL there is people effortlessly better than me and i never get recognition for what i do even if doing it kills me mentally. even if i don't sleep for a week trying to revise for tests other people are ALWAYS better and i'm sick of trying to beat people who effortlessly better than me. better grades, better drawings, better at sport, better at singing, better at acting, reads more, better at wrighting, better at talking, better at everything. apparently everyone has something there good at but the thing is i can't do anything. there's always someone better. i can't be bothered anymore.
I am starting to burnout this year. I'm a sophmore in high school, and I'm terrified that I won't get anywhere in life, yet I'll feel some sense of relief from not being up top. I'm neurodivergent and it's SO! DAMN! HARD! TO! COPE! when nobody knows or cares what that even means. I'm only just finding answers when things are starting to go downhill and I am so, so afraid.
I’m an A+ student but there are many of those at my old school last year. Me and Micah would work our asses off but Dalton would get all of the honor. I burnt out from trying. I got nothing, NOTHING. Micah got NOTHING. Some other gifted kids get everything but we seemed overlooked. I hate when teachers pick their favorite student and make it obvious. Maybe if I was Dalton I would be better liked, honored, loved. Though, I never earned honor even for how hard I worked. I never liked school last year because of “no accomplishments”. It wasn’t my fault I got nothing, it wasn’t Micah’s fault he got nothing, it wasn’t even Daltons fault. It was the teachers that made Dalton the “star” of the school.
used to be good at anything, school, life, friendship, everything. now ? a failure, everything. Can i go back ? where am i praised, pretty, clever, is that so hard ?
As a child of a man who had straight a's his whole life, when I started reading at a third grade reading level in kindergarten I've been forced to keep it up, it's 3am and I'm working on all of my assignments so I can't make home happy... I can't do it anymore it's getting to hard 😻
I know what this feels like. I've been burned out since last year and I've been suicidal more than once I tried my best still and I believed if I didn't have straight A's I would fail at life I'm currently losing my motivation to even make it to high school but I know I have to live. We all do. You can only live this life once, why waste it? In other words, keep going and do what's best for you. Don't do what I did and keep going until you break in a trillion pieces. Live for me, at least Amazing playlist btw 💕
Can’t be the only gifted kid that is burnout and wants to speak up about so much stuff but never does because they know the consequences and overthinks it until they just give up on the issue because they are middle school age and teachers and adults say that we are just being crazy and don’t know what we are talking about because we are kids and being taught that there is only one right answer to everything even though they are correct and the adults are wrong. 😐
I love my worth being based upon my grades. And then my depression from feeling worthless for failure is looked over and I’m scolded for not making my parents look like good parents for being a failure.
Isn't it funny how we feel safer when talking bunch of random people our problems and these people understanding our problems but we don't feel safe telling our own parents or siblings.
I'm a gifted kid in an all gifted family and I am failing and never have gotten a c and currently have a e and report cards go out soon I can't raise the grade I'm going to get my phone taken away and forced to sit at the table and contemplate why I'm such a failure when they go out for 2 months
Can relate because all my life I've been an honor student but when Grade 4 came I was rejected by my crush and I was so naive and sensitive at that time so I lost focus on my studies and lost my honor role now I'm trying my very best to get it back but no one sees it, they never notice my progress and improvements and even my own family thinks I'm stupid because everyone in my family before were overachiever valedictorians/honor students and I'm just someone with average grades. And wanting to go to other schools because their standards are lower there but my fam wont allow it because the standards in my school are high, yet they have the audacity to complain when I don't have an honor role
I have been a gifted kid ever since I can remember, always being part of the students with the highest grades. But at what cost? I rarely had friends, I was always stressed about getting a grade lower than an A+. Being a gifted kid is horrible, it's like you sold your soul to be like this without even you knowing. Everyone now has extreme expectations for me, it's like I had to sell my childhood just to end up in suffering. I never managed to experience childhood, I never manage to experience finding out who I am. I just ended up seeing myself as a body, a body that only knows how to copy people's positive actions and reactions. I don't know what are emotions, I never felt them I only do what I think is good for my future. I'm only a puppet of my mother who does whatever she wants to, she wants me to live her dreams she couldn't achieve? Then I'll have to do it. I honestly have given up on many of my dreams if not every single one. And yet I still let people down, "I lost you on 4th grade!" "You were never like this it must have been _ who influenced you" "What did I do wrong for you to end up like this?" I don't know woman, maybe I started to realize I don't feel emotions and have no personality or whatever people feel at that point in my life. To be honest, I have told how I feel no emotions to some "friends", they wanted to help me so I started faking positive results but in the end, I still have no emotion or a personality. I'm a mirror of sorts, the only thing that I haven't copied from other people are my interests. So yeah I never wish other people to be gifted kids since they are the first ones to experience burnout and trust me, not all of us recover from it.
I just realized that I've been replaying this playlist for almost 2 year's from now on... And this is totally I've feel right now.. im scared to tell them that I can't do what they're expecting me to do for them..
I'm gifted(I think), I have good grades, I act like a perfectionist, but now it stopped I don't have the energy to study, or even get sleep. if I study too much I get no sleep if I try to sleep I can't study much. idk what happened to me. my parents asked why I don't smile anymore, and why I looked so tired I said I was fine...I thought I was...I thought it was me that I became this. but it was school my parents and tutors. and now I don't have straight A's I have A's and B's and I'm stressing over it
In my childhood I was the intelligent kid always being diligent and always obligated to do whatever my mom wished me to do so. I read and read and consumed knowledge from the world. I enjoyed reading and thinking (god I was so creative /innovative when i was younger and much more better). I loved thinking too much I would get lost in my thoughts and had no spot for playing with other children my age or no idea of the other children's concept of fun. My schedule was always packed. For instance before I go to school I always had to revise /run through over the whole notes and study the outside knowledge such as reading books on how to socialize (since my mother liked to show me off to her friends and relatives saying how smart I am and my high grades. "xxx is a clever child") and how to become wiser and self study on English which no one really bothered doing in my elementary school at the time. I read books that adults usually read. I was a curious child and I had amazing visualization so I found joy in making use of it. I would talk to myself alone. Write in my diary. Make up plot lines and predict people. Analyze my surroundings and people. I never really had such that I could call as friends but I didn't care much. I regardedthem as 'childish' even tho I was the youngest of them all. No one really tried to befriend me either (except for one cerntain girl) since I looked intimidating and quiet (some confessed that I looked like a psychopath later on) and was usually the 'overacheiver ' so no one really talked to me unless they want my help on something or my notes. I really loved my mother's showing off so I tried harder. Since she had never praised me since as far as I can remember I craved for the indirect praises (or which i deemed them to be). But then I got burnt out. I scored my first B ever on maths and got beaten up with the hanger. I tried harder but it didn't really work.In fact it got worse I was on the verge of su!c!d3 and self hate and called myself a disappointment mentally. My creativity ran out and my vocabulary isn't expanding. I got diagnosed with ADHD and had mental issues. I'm ashamed to say I'm still stuck in the burn out. Tho I changed schools and gradually became better. (set Straight A* score on science and english and computer science and A for maths for a year but full marks were only if I get lucky). I'm now stuck on 23 up to 24.5/25 score. I hope everyone who's going through a burnout can get over it. Don't be harsh on yourself:). Together we can get throught this.
To me, it isn’t gifted to be “gifted”, it’s like you were gifted with a curse when u were born, having a high or even impossible expectation. Some ppl don’t know the pressure on those who are gifted, even if no one is pressuring them. It’s not fun to be gifted. Yea it was fun at first knowing I wasn’t average I was “smarter” but now knowing I’m supposed to be “smarter” when I could belong in the average is just disappointing. And I’ve heard ppl say it’s not fun to be “dumb” either, as ppl don’t expect they have potential or that they just pressure themselves a lot just to show that they are worth it. Then there’s those who are “average”, ur just average, u might have potential, u might not. They worry more about those who are “smarter” or “dumber” cause they are those who need more help to either “spread their wings” or “get them to at least pass” and then it’s just the “average” ppl, basically being like a middle child. The overall reason of all of this is school, let’s be honest. Ur either dumb or smart, in between no one cares abt u. Dumb ur too “fragile”. Smart you are perfect, if u fail they won’t be there. It’s messed up that were being defined as a person based of numbers and disgusting
I feel nothing anymore everyone around me is already planning for me to fail which gives me zero motivation for the future. I just wanna give up already.
never been a straight a student or anything but I used to be one of the best in class and Ive definitely never had to study much to be okay in school (I learned quickly and was really curious and all) which is now kicking my ass in high school (the stress mostly my grades are still fine but i always get the "so much wasted potential" shit and all) sometimes I wish I was worse at school but I cannot bring myself to not care if that makes sense (also i live in Germany and our school system is probably kinda different)
I swear i blinked for one fucking second, and all of a sudden i lost every single aspect of control i had. Like it just hit me my avarage is a 73% and i am going fucking insane.
I’m so glad that there are people like me! :D You know sometimes I wish my grades were bad, but if my grades were bad then my mother would probably kill me. I love the very little attention I earn from others at school, but it makes me feel like I have to do good in everything. Also, as a so called “intelligent” person, I’m extremely quiet. As a result, I can’t speak up and then I feel like I’m pressured to talk. It makes me shake. As a burnt out gifted kid, you’re always going to experience the expectations that are even higher, someone immediately commenting on your grades when As turn into an A-, having performance anxiety, being embarrassed when you make a simple mistake that many people make, people talking about you like you’re not even there, huge amounts of stress, drawing on paper and then erasing it because you fear the teacher may see it and feeling like you only come to school to just be pressured. There’s more but that’s all I’m going to name. :) Because my mother expects As, she yelled at me and my brother to get our grades up and said we should be grateful we have a roof over our head and food on our plate. Surprisingly, I still have good grades as a burnt out gifted kid, so I’m not dead yet, at least. But I’m sure my grades will fall apart sooner or later. So, wish me luck in school because I will definitely need it. “I am disappointed in you.” It’s a common thing to hear for people like us. < / 3!
0:00 Oh No! - Marina And The Diamonds
2:57 Top Of My School - Katherine Lynn-rose ft. Joshua Turcher
5:34 Are You Satisfied? - Marina And The Diamonds
8:52 I Can't Handle Change - Roar
12:10 Brutal - Olivia Rodrigo
14:35 Better Than Me - The Brobecks
19:00 I'll die anyway - girl in red
0a
ugh u uu ummm 🤔 what 😮 uuuuuu
I feel like Basics in Behavior aka Baldi's Basics song would fit to this playlist very much
Tys
My god- I did this 6 months ago
Grades: dropping
Mood: dropping
Intelligence: dropping
Parent support: dropping
Motivation: dropping
Feeling of Inadequacy: d̶r̶o̶ rising
there is one thing you can`t forget it ..the pain that comes fom studying have end ..but your success and your Study certificate are endless!! your success and your hard work results will stay with you forever bestii!! love you and hope you`re okay 😄💙💙
y e s this is a perfect description thank you
we're gonna get 'em back, let's go girl!
I regret knowing happiness.
@@JadeMones dont, let it be your motivation, what you fight for, to achieve again, cause you deserve it.
You know whats the best about being a burned out gifted kid? The fact that you literally cannot study but you're a perfectionist at the same time. I love my life :DDD
MOOD YES UGHHHH YES
This describes my life
oml i love your pfp
FUCKING MOOD WOOHOO
Same
It's so fucking hard explaining to your parents that you can't be the best anymore bc u fell like u're gonna give up on everything while being the "gifted" kid..
God I f***ing hate being gifted, it's so hard to come up with answers for people who ask questions like "what's it like to be gifted" and/or "can you do my homework". It's worse when you're gifted in multiple subjects I had the weirdest gifted program at my old school, they'd packed us up on a bus and ship us off to another school. I hit my metaphorical wall in 3 grade and my grades hit the fan sprinkled with some bullying on the side made for a deadly combo
youre just not smart
My parents literally hold the fact that I'm the "gifted" kid against me. I have to be the best. The best grades. Top of my class. All the extra activities. Everything
Being gifted isn’t a gift. It’s just a present you got without your consent.
And people expect you to be grateful for it. Even though the gift is just a ticking time bomb about to go off any second
@@gachanoob1012 yep and if you are grateful for it they’ll call you a “narcissist”
@@egg1643 and they yell at you when you tell them you didn’t want their “gift”
@@gachanoob1012 yep
@@egg1643 so fun!
My dad asked me today why i dont smile anymore.
My mum is constantly asking me why im quiet.
. Im stressed about grades
. Im stressed about math
. I lost all my friends
. Im the bad guy
. Im constantly overwhelmed with these thoughts that tell me im usless and why do i exist.
. My concentration isnt good cuz im constantly worried about my future.
. I have a constant thought in the bacl of my mind that everyone hates me.
. Im the good child i cant vape,smoke but the stress of being the smart sibling is stressful
. I never feel like myself
. Im alway tierd and falling asleep in class.
Hey, idk if this helps or not, maybe im a bit late but my advice is to try get enough sleep everynight, that helps for me, drinking water helps w/ that!! Give yourself a routine for the morning, set an alarm(e.g 7am) as that also helps alot!!
Try and say no to people if they ask for your help, it puts more stress on your shoulders if you say yes
im a gifted kid who's dropped and rose back up, that's what I'd reccommend.
Also taking a break is rlly rlly important if its needed :)
Jesus, we have similar experiences. I’m sorry you’re going through this.
i had the same experienced, pls do rest as long as u need
i don’t like the fact im relating to this comment and many more 🥲
Finally a playlist that understands that gifted kids also have brunouts and just because we are gifted does mean we are different i remember if i failed people used to make me feel like crap now I have anxiety it gets triggered when i do a small mistake
Im sorry to hear about that
I cant feel your pain tho bcus im not gifted at all,no really all i am only talented in pixel art. P I X E L A R T
Dude i cant even make a 2 second animation without my hands burning.
I fell your pain too, I know how it is, but im sorry
Make that an us
Make that a me too.
i’m the exact same. i feel like sometimes it’s just inevitable for gifted kids to experience a dramatic downfall at some point in their lives. burnout sucks so bad and even more when nobody takes you seriously and thinks you just got “lazy”. i can’t even sleep every night because of the many regrets I have about my school life just rushing into my head after dark.
brutal hits hard to home for me, im sick of being young. no one takes my word when im right. im definitely getting gifted burnout right now. not a teenage dream anymore
edit: why tf are people liking this comment lmao???
Honestly, I don’t want to be young because I don’t want to experience this anymore, but I’m not ready to get older.
Because we can relate
same
I relate about the no one believing you. Not even my family does, so I look up what we were arguing about and I'm almost always right, but them I'm told I have a problem for looking it up and being right, but then told "I thOuGHt YoU HaD a PhOtOgRaPhIc MeMoRy" and "Haha stupid" when I'm wrong. I hope people have started believing you, though
youre not smart
i totally burnt out two years ago. i used to be an A+ student in all the gifted classes and i hated it. i got really stressed and felt like if it wasn’t perfect there’s no point in doing it. i’d been getting Fs and stuff but now i’m an A B and sometimes C student. i’m now realizing i had no idea who i was back then but now i have a personality wowow amazing im not an A+ uwu girl anymore HAHAHAHHSHAUZNZJ
that started deep and got kinda crackhead-ish at the end
I try my best and smh it's never enough. Can you tutor me? Begging rn
samee!! I got straight A's the entirety of my 6th grade year, but each year my grades just get lower and lower. I actually failed a class this year. I'm starting 10tn grade in August, wish me luck lmfao
I THINK EVERYONE DO GET A+'s ALOT IN LIKE KINDERGARTEN TO GRADE 3 AND THEN THERES GRADE 4 BRUHHH I DIDNT ASK FOR THIS SHIT ;^;
@@PureChaosCosplays oof
Good luck ig-
I'm not a gifted kid but I'm definitely feeling burnout
Oh that just sounds so sad.
still very valid ;-; good luck
Trying to be gifted but its making me feel burnt out💀
Im not a burnout just a gifted kid but I always feel like I should do better and put my grades before myself
@@ebitodhe2840 hey don't pressure your self to much :( to much pressure got to me to get burn our it was one of a lot of reasons :((i did the exact smae thing grades are a poirty of mine. and now they are only getting worse :((
academically low performing students with burnout unite, we cannot stand this injustice! .... let's take care of it tomorrow
realest thing i ever heard
what's it called when you never learnt how to actually study cuz you always knew what to do when you were younger but now that you don't know what to do and suck at studying since you never had to and still have a fear of your teachers because of your primary teacher being her. I think I ran out of my gifts lol.
I’m pretty sure that’s called an issue with the education system but I may be wrong :/
EXACT SAME THING
It's relateable in this house
Literally me
thats the gifted kid phenomenon, not officially called that but imma call it that. Gifted Kids are special needs kids, we know everything young and if we dont learn how to study out of fun or interest we'll fail later in life, atleast in school. Not because we're dumb, but because we never learned how to properly study and now that we need to push so much knowledge into our heads in inhuman speeds we're falling behind. I'm lucky enough myself to have learned how learning works out of interest. Learning is a thing to be learned and mastered, if you don't then you will face the consequences. And ppl like us? We don't, why would we we knew everything from young on, hope youre doing good bud
I had a burnout in the pandemic, I had my lowest grades ever and my parents just thought I was "lazy", felling better now but still trying 2 be perfect (just surprises me how much people think I'm ""perfect"" and ""smart"" and how much they hate when I'm not what I was supposed to be
Same me too after the pandemic i don't know what happen to me l failed for the fist time in my exams
The pandemic really hit me hard as well. I worked even harder in the first year but then i pushed myself too much in the second year until I finally broke and couldn’t get back up on my feet. Now, all people could ever say to me is about how I used to be so perfect and I let it go because I got lazy. I hate that word so much. I feel so misunderstood every time my parents say that to me but I can never say anything back.
In the same situation rn🙃
Honestly ngl I want to be a workaholic (I thrive off academic validation) and be secluded (being selfish for myself) but I am scared to be in the stage of burnout for my HSC's which is in around a little over two years. (HSC is just a huge exam for you to open doors and opportunities for Uni )
You just summed me up. ARE YOU ME?!?!?
I used to be what people would consider a gifted kid but I never gave myself a break and it got to the point that I started failing my classes because I was so worn out i was falling asleep in class, or when I was studying. Now I'm what people would consider a failure, because I just gave up trying to please everyone when I knew I couldn't even when I tried my hardest
This is just like my story after i gave up of being like how people wanted me my mom just called me a disappointment and started talking after my back and stuf like that but in a weird advantage i didn't care that people made fun of me to after what she did and I still dont care at all and I actually become a happy person and i started leaving my life with a new me but I still am not sure if this is for real who I am
@@Howbeautifulislife055 this hits way to close to home
I’m relating to so many people in the comments but this is the most scarily accurate one. If I hadn’t read your name, I’d think I wrote this.
...are we the same person...
Gifted or not, burnout sucks
And I understand what you're going through
The expectations just pile up until you break
And then everyone's disappointed in you
and then it all just spirals into a dark hole that seems impossible to get out of
...but just know
that there will always be someone to help you out
everything will be better
life will get better
its okay to make mistakes, to fall down.
you still deserve to live
you're an amazing human
I legit cried bcs of your comment, I just got scolded by my dad forgetting a 6 out of 20 and just had 3 tests tday and one was a math test that I totally failed I'm cutting, smoking and crying whenever I can fr it's horrible
Tbh, there’s not many people who actually can help a gifted burnout, even less for a simple burnout
There’s probably no one in many people’s lives who can or will help.
Even if there is sometimes people are just so scared of people knowing that they’re a burnout
Okay so "Are you satisfied" has always resonated with me, the beginning lyric is "I was pulling out my hair, the day I cut the deal, chemically calm. Was I meant to feel happy that my life was about to change?"
I have trichotillomania, I can no longer keep long hair and it got so much worse with online school and trying to uphold what my large family knows me as. It's a huge comfort to have a song that, although isn't about trich, mentions something I strongly relate to.
I also had severe panic and anxiety attacks due to large changes in my life, even if it were for the better. Ive gotten better but at this point its only because I dissociate into my own world to cope.
I understand I have anxiety attacks but they used to be so bad I would pull clumps of hair out before I got on meds but dissociating just keeps me from feeling to me much and hurting others this is mental health now but I know you can get better every one can it is possible ❤️
@@Mocha_coffee I'm so sorry to hear that but it's so relieving to hear you're doing better now 💛
@@PlaguedMelody thank you❤️
Hey, I also have trichotillomania. I don't rip out my hair, I rip my eyelashes. Not sure how that started but I understand. You aren't alone ok?? I'm here if you ever need to talk
For me it’s
( Oh No! ) Literally all the lyric describe me…
I'm not really sure how I ended up on this video, but hearing the music and seeing what you kids write in the comments compelled me to write this.
Full disclosure first of all: I'm 34 now, but a generation ago I was one of those gifted kids. The expectations from home started in my early teens, and were never stated outright but were incredibly heavily implied, amplified further by the pressure I put myself under. A gifted program in my country's equivalent of high school was followed by a STEM degree, which in turn was followed by an international career. Rarely was this ever complemented with hobbies or a functioning social life to any extent.
My career is slowly winding down now, and it feels like waking up from a strange dream, feeling disoriented and hollow. The whole thing only felt rewarding fleetingly, from time to time. Only now do I start to notice how socially quirky I am even at my age, due to sheer lack of practice during my formative years. I can't begin to list all the small, tiny things I feel like I've missed out on, and what did I really get in return? I'm a very frugal person, and while the savings I've built up will enable me to retire early, I could easily have done the same working any other job. It would have taken me a handful more years, is all.
I've gone over it in my mind, but I can't think of a single material thing to buy with all that money which would bring me any amount of happiness. The sad adult in me does not want or need a goddamn Tesla, but the stunted, interrupted teenager still inside me somewhere wants all those years back. My inner child wants to do normal teen things: Play soccer, try to learn the guitar or to draw, send silly messages to the girlfriend I never got to have, write awful fanfiction (is that still a thing?), sneak out late to hang with friends. I don't get a do-over though. There is no such thing, and all I can do now is struggle to regain some sense of meaning in what's left of my life.
By some miracle, I did find someone to marry at the end of my twenties who could put up with all of my mental quirks, and our daughter was born a few months ago. It's through her that I found strength again and why I'm still on this planet to be completely honest. One resolution I have made, of course, is never to push her. I will teach her things, of course, and help her if she struggles, naturally. But never push her. She will not have to go through the same thing I went through, and as long as she's happy, she will have succeeded in my eyes.
As for my fortune? It's hers, but she doesn't know it yet. I don't spend it to any extent that it shows and I won't tell her about it until she's old enough to handle it responsibly, at which point I plan to just give it all to her as a surprise. That is actually a moment I do look forward to, giving her the surprise of a lifetime.
As for what to do with myself now, I don't know. I just don't know.
The point I want to make is this: If parents or other adults in your lives try to push you by "speaking from experience", show them this text I wrote since my experience also must hold some weight. I put in the hours, got the grades, got the awards, got the degrees, got the money, and who am I now? I'm an empty husk of a man, inside of which is a boy who never got to just be a boy. I did everything asked of me and the end result is that I don't want to live anymore. "Are you satisfied with an average life?" I don't really know since I never got to try, but I'm pretty sure I would have been. It would beat waiting in vain for the happiness to finally start, for this reward at the finish line I was always told would be here. Well, where is it? What was all of this for in the end?
Stay safe out there, all of you. Do what feels right, and whatever you aspire to do, don't lose yourselves while doing it. The least I can do is try to prevent other people from feeling the way I do now.
I feel this. I was a gifted kid. Grades are dropping
Im falling apart
Thank you for this
“What’s happening to your grades?”
“Smile”
“Your dramatic and need to try harder”
Yeah, I feel that.
and dont forget the "just stop being lazy!"
I used to have the entire lyrics of Oh No! memorized, and not only memorized, internalized. The song spoke the only reason for my existence: to succeed.
Ever since I was little I had been ahead of my grade, and started questioning my existence at the age of 7. When I did this, I turned to the only thing I knew, school. I spent all my time, energy, free time, everything on school. It paid off, I scored high, and I did well. I got easily used to being the best in my class. As the grades, moved on, this became more stressful, and the sense of accomplishment I felt from it faded.
I encountered someone who was better than me in certain topics when I moved in the 4th grade, and it sent me off the rails. I couldn't think about anything besides beating her, and being the best again. It was the hardest I ever had to work on something school related, and somehow even when I did better than her, she was given more credit. She didn't deserve it, but what would people have thought if I ever said that? There was an unspoken competition between us, and it destroyed me. I even tried to beat her in things not school related. I spent an entire summer training so I could be faster than her, I read constantly so I would be the most loved in the library. I soon became known as a try hard, a book worm, and a socially inexperienced but book smart bitch. I wanted to be the best so bad. I could've been more popular, I could've had more friends, but instead I focused on being the best. The most satisfied feeling I've ever gotten was beating that redhead in a county wide essay competition. My essay won, not hers.
I went to middle school, and eventually moved to Colorado. Where I moved to didn't have a gifted program with more extreme classes, and the curriculum was much less difficult than what I had faced at my old school, so I was back at the top. Within a week, the math teacher dubbed me an in-class tutor, and my other classes were also going well. There was one kid I couldn't seem to beat.
Anyways, he's now my boyfriend. I've told many people, who've given me the response, "Naturally." Now he rants to me about how hard it is, how difficult it is, and how hard it's hurt him. I normally feel or have felt many of the ways he explains, but before I can give him someone to relate to, he compares. "You've never had to..." and so on. It hurts, but who am I to ever say something while he's speaking about his issues? Then I'd be an attention seeking bitch wo won't let people vent, not even her boyfriend. So now, anytime I feel the ways I DESERVE to feel, because of the shit I've gone through, the stress, the family issues, the competitive tendencies, the purpose of being the best that I have yet to fill once again, I feel guilty. Like I don't deserve to.
I used to listen to Oh No! to give me motivation and a sense of meaning.
Now I can't listen to it without feeling like I'm trying to be someone else for attention. But it's not for attention. My feelings are real. I am real. I'm my own person who relates to others without speaking. I am my own person, and I'm allowed to feel this way. But I can't convince myself that's true, no matter how much it is. And now I'm the burnt out and lazy picture they've all painted out for me. I've been lied to and deceived about my own being, my own personality.
I want to be the way I was. I deserve this. I'm real. I'm my own. Hear me, someone, please..
Thank you for reading my own little rant, I'm sorry to vent here, but I don't know where else to. Love you all, you are so amazing, and fellow gifted kids have given me some of the best times of my life.
This was a very underrated and relatable comment (except for the bf part I’ll b single forever 🥲) I always feel the expectations rising no matter how much time and effort I put into something, it feels like nothing and I only feel good if I get recognized for something ITS SO HARD TO BE “GIFTED”
I had the reading age of 18 at 8. I got all A*'s in school, teachers yell at me if i slip, my parents yell at me if i mess up, its literally so stressful. I just want to have lower expectations
I was reading 400-500+ page books at the same age and my mother had enrolled me in a gifted school with high expectations and I failed out the expectations got way too high for me
My reading level was a 13.9 (that means better than most college students) and I still am but burnout has led to me always forgetting to turn in the work I spent hours on and I always get yelled at for it. And I know that “this isn’t the answer” but tbh there isn’t one. You live day to day pretending to be happy until you die so why not cut ig off early. Last chance to change my mind will be on 03/03/2035 just in case someone cares
"The pressure is literally killng me" I want to say that to my parents because they only care about my grades instead of me , my health , and my mental health
@@gachanoob1012 You shouldn't do it,I know what it feels and i have thougt about it but Life will get better just trust me .
youre not smart
the feeling when you put your entire self worth in grades and then everything starts falling apart and the grades stop goving you any sprt of gratification but you've sacrificed too much to turn back now and everyone you know is disappointed in you because of it lol
The moon was playing tricks on me, hiding behind the pale clouds. I inhaled the cigarette smoke and the salt taste of tears, drying up. The sounds of the party behind my back sounded muffled and distant. I shifted my weight slightly, careful not to slide off the sleek roof. It’s not that I really cared if I did.
The night was warm but suddenly I felt chills running up and down my bare arms. Coming here was a bad idea. Wearing this stupid black dress, with a stupid hope that someone might notice me, was even a worth one. I tugged my leather jacket. It was ridiculously small and not warming.
The sharp sound behind me made me stir. I almost spilled the beer I was holding in my left hand, I as I whirled my head back.
In the dark I could only distinguish the tall silhouette of someone, climbing over the open window, straight onto the roof.
“Oh shit!” He tripped and grabbed to the closest thing to him. Which happened to be me. A jolt shot through me, as I recognized the pale eyes staring in mine.
“You?”
“You?”
“Mind if I sit here?”
“Well, that’s not my house, so…”
He was not the one I wore my fancy dress for. How do you behave with the best friend of your crush who you happen to despise in class and out of it because he is the arrogant jerk?
“Right.” He fell next to me; his long legs clad in black jeans brushing mine. I decidedly didn’t move an inch. He held a drink in his hands. “What are you doing up here?”
“Uhm,” I hurried to kill off the cigarette.
“Don’t worry, Straight-A, I’m not telling your mom and dad.” Even in the dark I could hear his smirk.
He took a sip of his drink.
“In fact, do you have one for me?”
“I…,” I frowned into the darkness. “Mmm, yes. Yes, I do.”
I fished out a pack in the pocket of my jacket and handed to him. I wasn’t going to bring the lighter to his lips.
“Thanks.” He took a cigarette between his long fingers and a lighter from me. For a moment I was transfixed by his movements, as if he was Prometheus, bringing a gift to earth. I cleared my throat and looked away, back at the moon, that was still hiding.
“Don’t you get tired of it?” He suddenly asked. His voice a little raspy.
“What?”
“Of trying to be perfect. All the time.”
I stared at his profile in the dark. Coming from him, it sounded so ridiculous. He was the one, who always tried to best me at everything in class. He was the one who took away my scholarship last year, this much I knew.
“What are you talking about?”
“Well, to be honest, I’m terribly drunk.” He laughed and looked back at me, dimples, and all. A lock of black hair fell across his forehead as if he stepped down from a magazine cover. “And when I’m drunk I become honest.”
I took a deep breath. Actually, I could smell the alcohol on his breath.
And if I was wise, I would have shifted away from him, instead of getting all tingly from how out thighs touched. But I was never wise.
“Really?” He was no longer looking at me, rather focusing on the moon. And I wanted to change it. “Tell me one honest thing.”
That brough me back his attention.
He smelled of expensive cologne and leather and money. Of success without effort. Of bets always won, of card always falling in his favor, of silver spoons and summer homes and trust fund money.
“You look really pretty tonight,” he said then. “I keep seeing you in my sleep. And sometimes I want to put my hands under your shirt so badly I must dig my nails into the palms of my hands till they bleed. How's that for honesty?”
P.S. If you'd like, you can find me on Wattpad by @trust_me_I_lie
i NEED a part two
Damn. Part 2 when? I’m invested.
I NEED A PART TWO OMG
wattpad?
This is really good, actually. It’s not often I see talented writing on these types of videos, but well done
((partial tw!!))
Ahh i havent vented in one of these comment sections or really to anyone in general in forever. I guess lately things have been getting rough again. I can do it, i know i can. Like my parents have told me for forever, "youre kind, smart, talented. Dont put it to waste." So what have i grown into? A people pleaser that now just finished their sophomore year of highschool with their lowest grade being a 91. Im getting tired but i know i can keep going. Only two more years left and set out plans for the future. I can get there, i know i can. Can i really see myself surviving next year? not exactly. But seeing the smiles on my amazing boyfriend, younger siblings, parents and friends faces when i succeed is worth it. The support has been dwindling over the years but its alright, things will turn out in the end. Is most of this the toxic positivity ive forced on myself speaking? Yeah, probably but it makes everyone else happy. Ive been averaging 2-3 hours of sleep a night and about 1 or 2 meals a day on good days. Just taking it a day at a time though. If youve read through all this thank you stranger, i love you and want you to know i am so proud of you for making it this far. We've got this and theres only a bit longer then we'll all be free. Its gonna turn out alright
I don't know if this reply is overstepping any boundaries, so feel free to ignore this.
I just wanted to say that as a fellow (former) gifted kid I also used to destroy myself for the expectations of my parents, my teachers and even my friends, and while everyone's experience is different, believe me when I say I've been there. please don't take this as me telling you what to do, but depriving yourself of a healthy body and psyche is not the way to go. it's alright to mess up, and it's alright to be average or even below average. appeasing expectations is something that many children are taught is a good thing, a necessary thing even, and that fucks with us a lot. it's great to see that you have a positive outlook (or at least a mantra to tell yourself when things aren't looking so positive) but that's only half the battle. what counts is that you don't let yourself be ruined by a system that doesn't support you adequately, and I know that's really hard, but Please, take breaks and look after yourself. your health should always come first, and definitely above the expectations of people who are failing to keep you safe and healthy.
I just got done with my second try of my final year of high school. last year I dropped out because of mental health reasons, and after the summer I reasoned with myself that, as long as I take it slow and don't fall back into toxic behavioral patterns, giving it another go wouldn't hurt. it did hurt. I failed and did not graduate. but more importantly I had what probably was the worst mental health low I've ever had.
I'm currently not in a good place, but if all of this has taught me something it's that school is just not worth it. sure education is important, but your life is so much more important than that.
yadda yadda, preachy rant over.
again this is not meant to convince you of anything, it's maybe just another perspective to consider.
no matter what you choose to do in the future I hope you make that choice for yourself, not for others. and just as you said, you'll get through this one way or another.
I wish you lots of luck on your journey :)
Sorry if this seems lecture-y, I just wanted to add my two-cents in because this is exactly where I was sophomore year.
2 years is a long time to wait for salvation. Especially when the salvation you expect doesn’t even exist. College isn’t some magical fix-all for Al the unhealthy habits you’ve built in your life up until now.
Burnout at 17 is a real thing, and man does it hit hard. For me, I was applying for colleges at 17. Applying for scholarships. Applying with straight As, 5 AP courses, several extracurricular activities, volunteering, whatever. And the sinking realization hits, that you don’t get into all the schools you want. You get little if any in scholarships. What all happened to the last 12 years spent laboring in school?
And the slippery slope to the bottom starts. Never have I ever felt so out of control of my life. My health was failing, my grades, I hated things I used to love. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why.
End of senior year I got hit with 3 infections at once and ended up in the hospital.Honestly, given how shit my sleep and eating patterns were at the time, I’m lucky that that was the worst.
Escaped high school with utter burn out and, what I thought at the time, to be an embarrassingly low senior year.
The mend, the healing from burn out starts when you want it to. It’s slow to break these habits. If they’re so self destructive, one would think them easy to break. But it’s not so. Still, once you start getting enough sleep, eating better, valuing friends, hobbies, passions, life gets better. Take care of your mental health, see a professional if you can. Take breaks when you need them. Enjoy the fullest life has to offer when you have the energy to face the day with your all.
Hey, I finally took the chance to look back at this and completely forgot I’d posted it 😅 but thank you so much, I figured I owed enough for you taking time out of your day to atleast give a lil update. I know im still far from perfect and maybe okay but im working on getting there, im starting to act and dress how I want and have cut off people that haven’t been the best for me. Im not putting in countless hours into just passing in school anymore and quite honestly stopped caring about the pressures put on by others. Im going to be able to graduate my senior year early and am putting myself and my happiness first this year. I can’t wait to be done with it and finally get out of here. There’s no way I’d go back to school once im finished with next year. But I’ve found my people that make life worth living and not just existing for the praise. I know im still far from being “okay” in any sense but im the closest I’ve been in years
I never wanted to be in gifted classes, although my parents wish me to be, and I'm aware that I'm losing my "special touch" and they're disappointed in it. I, am a "slow burning fuse", about to explode any second.
It appears that we all seem to be slowly going insane at our own expectations, the standards. I am currently studying hard in the middle of summer to apply for a " well-known highschool " for intelligent students, and I deeply apologize for ranting as this is usually an undesired trait that most don't like.
It seems that not all of us are so different... The thing is that the only reason that I was driven to succeed in every academic program, is gone. And I am slowly withering away from every comment that asks to do better, to try harder. We all overwork ourselves, and my way of escaping this reality for temporary, is to engulf myself in romance fanfictions because I can't get any love just staying inside the books.
I just hope that everyone goes out of their own hellholes.
Hey take it slowly trust me it's all going to work out take a break from time to time and not a tiktok break or something go out see cities and people and imagine urself in the future where would u want to be between them and work for it not too much just do what's enough and trust me it would all be sorted out somehow
We’re gonna win this battle. We’ll all get out of this bottomless pit of feeling hopeless and useless one day.
I had advanced math for as far as I can remember. It started hitting my really hard the past few years due to the pandemic and having a new school. Once I had an F most of 6th grade year, they still kept me in but, made me go up one math grade instead. I was a 7th grader learning 9th grade math last school year (Which ended for me around 3-4 weeks ago). None of my family knew about the math I was learning so, it felt like an endless pit of dark moments. All my friends weren't in honors and thought it was a dream. It doesn't feel like that to me. I've gotten better grades 7th grade than 6th but it makes me want to breakdown whenever I see a worksheet of math.
If you've gone through the same thing, I just want to let you know you aren't alone. I'm with you. Just try your best to hold on and it will all pay off. Thank you for reading this passage. :)
Oml someone who shares the same past s me-
😄
Used to be a gifted kid, but totally burnt out because my father never have hope in me. He always say that if I fail I will lose a lot of things and that he will even kick me out of the house. I felt so pressured to the point I no longer care about my study nor myself. It sucks.
someone: are you ok?
me: yeah
me: relates to all of the songs in the playlist
*I loved this as soon as I heard Top Of My School*
I really struggle with having a traditional family, that essentially believes that we should always be the best, but they can't understand burnout. I remember telling my mom that I got writers block, and that I would just enter the writing contest next year, and she blew up on me. So I heavily relate to this playlist.
i don't get high expectations from my parents as i used to. they say they understand that what i study is difficult, and that i shouldn't put pressure on myself, that i shouldn't kill myself trying to be on top of the class like i used to. but it's been so long since i felt "free" from pressure that i'm so used to the intense anxious feeling of trying to be the best. though, i don't think i was ever the "best". so now to compensate for the expectations i don't believe i ever met, i work harder and harder and harder. it's so sickening how they tell me to chill out, how they tell me that i am doing good enough, when i, myself, don't even feel like i am good enough.
When I took my math exam, I got a three out of four. I got a four on everything and I told my family member and said, “It’s okay right? I’ll do better next time” to which they responded with “That’s really how you think of it? What if there was no next time. See the problem”
Me: having good grades
School: switches to standard reference grading (grading on a scale from 1-4)
Me: feels like my grades are bad because I’m getting 1-3s
Me: burning out trying to get my grades to all 3s.
Me: staying up til late at night getting my homework done while also doing extra activities to get scholarships.
Me: depressed, su!cidal, insane, mad.
People forget that the gifted are tired. It’s hard to keep crap up. And people think we’re dramatic or selfish when we’re sad about getting one grade lower, but it’s because we’re pressured to be the best, pressured to keep our grades up. “Don’t settle for second best” they say.
It sucks.
We’re tired.
i'm in 10th grade and struggling to keep my grades up. every now and then when i have a PILE of assignments to do, I'll do all of them because of my fear of failure. i feel as though i've almost reached my breaking point. i'm so thankful that its finally summer break. i finally have time to recover from this school year. though i'm worried that next year is gonna tear me down, and the stress is gonna drown me. i'm scared that my sanity is gonna come down with me. i'm so tired of being the "gifted kid". i just wanna be normal and have lower expectations.
is your 10th grade over? You just feel wronged. don't you? because i do too why did they paint false dreams of becoming something so big in future to a little kid? i swear i don't even try to do something to make them them expect anything from me. But they always find some false glitter in me and i just say to myself " you'll regret everything when you find out who i really am at the end". I hope life starts going a little easy on us. ffs i can't handle it any longer.
[VENT WARNING]
People, especially my family, always said that I'm very talented. I learned how to read myself, could pretty much communicate in English (not my native language) when other people from my class couldn't even make easy sentences (some still can't-), never had to go to bonus classes (it's propably called another way...anyway xD) etc. etc.
This year I got a first B on my report card, because I pretty much suck at geography...and I'm just not interested at all in this thing, it BORES me when I have to learn it =.= And, well, considering few years ago I almost started crying in school out of fear & disappointment, 'cause I got my 1st C from a test, I propably was really hard on myself for this.
Well the thing is I didn't. It was my parents actually. It feels like I was to them just a perfect student since I started school & now their perfect machine got broken. Like the only way to fix it is to remind it every damn time it brings a good grade, that they suck at that one thing.
I know it's supposed to be an encouragment, but it's like they totally forget who their kid is - the person who was TERRIFIED of telling them they got a FREAKING C. It doesn't work as encouragment for me, it works opposite way actually. Makes me feel never enough for them and stuff. I know myself that I was never talented, it is just easy for me to learn easy stuff & easier to learn hard stuff I'm interested in - nothing more. But I'm just used to them being neutral about my grades. I always do the stuff myself; homeworks, learning for exams, projects - I can do it on my own. They pretty much never helped me with school. But when they found out I got a 1st C, they ofc started screaming at me (which led me to a little breakdown-). They knew I hate when someone screams at someone (thanks teachers), not even especially at me, I start to feel like the worst scum on the earth (though they think it's just fear and sadness). And the worst thing is that after 5 minutes they acted like nothing happened, they always do that after criticizing me and it just hurts. Like they can so easily get over something I overthink sometimes for days, something that even after years I can accidentally remember and start to feel so freaking hurt. Ok, this rambling really seems like i just want attention I better just stop writting it-
Let me put something in: YOU. DESERVE. A. CHANCE. TO. VENT. You deserve better, and if you are looking for people who understand what you're going through, you've found us. We love you, and we want to be there for you.
you deserve a lot of hype!! amazing songs for bringing the title a theme!! well done, please continue making amazing playlists
I wouldn’t call myself gifted but between me and my brother I am the smarter sibling so I’m always pressured into getting good grades
Wow I relate to this so much my mother forces me to be the best of the best because my brother was just getting Bs so I have to have As
@@tamakiamajiki5039 it truly sucks
Straight A+'s without any help, yet here I am, breaking down every time I try to study. I feel like I let everyone down because my grades aren't as good as they were. It all feels pointless now because I'm not even allowed to get into my dream school because of my parents.
I had to skip most of the songs because I only wanted to listen to the ones I knew (idk why I always do this) but that’s besides the point. I don’t think I’m gifted and I’m not considered gifted anymore but this is helpful anyway
motivation: always moving up and down
social life: 50/50
grades: consistent honor student (ONLY..?)
parent support: 10/10 (thank you so much)
mental math abilities: 9/10
mood: 50/50 (fg therapist + the school system's making us cram)
love received and processed: 9/10
overall: i've had this desire to improve in studies and sports, but my motivation doesn't let me do so, esp with so many tasks mixing up in my schedule
My experience being a gifted burnt out kid is the fact is that I still get all A’s to “impress” my parents. To get a 4.0 GPA, I’ve been burnt out since 7th grade. I’m now a freshman. It’s not that I want good grades it’s because I’m stuck being the good child, be respectful, kind, hard working, staying on focus, having no friends to focus on school. Not being able to express myself. Good temper. not depressed, not being too lazy or eating too much, having to be responsible for all the pets even if they’re my sisters who neglected them.
Regardless if it’s in person or online. I’m pretending to be a person I’m not.
I just want to run away, start a new life, have a friend group, ditch school from time to time, to hangout after school, to have fun. To have an actual lover, go to thrift stores and try on stuff for fun. To have sleepovers, to do spooky shit, prank someone, run in the forest, climb big trees and fall and get hurt. To go camping, to be a free teenager, not having to worry about what others think of me. Having a best friend with me 24/7 that actually cares about me and doesn’t ditch me. Use me for venting. A guy that actually has my back. To be best pals. To steal tiny candy shit. To have a stray cat or dog, living in broken apartments, going to old libraries, using candles instead of electricity lights. To break a bone, anything to feel ALIVE. Driving to town to towns, on an adventure. To do something I was never allowed to do. being able to not worry about my mental health or my medical issues. To be an actual person rather than being a person I’m not.
I'm sorry... 🫂 Parents tend to act like our grades are the only thing in the world that ultimately matters, when life is short and there's so much more to it than numbers on a paper. The things you said you wanted to do sound really fun
@@ondine2008
Love this playlist! The songs are so well chosen MUCH LOVE!!! ツ ♡
I’m known as a gifted kid in my school. I pass everything without trying. But they didn’t know they gave me anxiety, and very bad mental illness because of it. Anytime I do anything wrong, it hurts hard.
Thank you for the playlist, I've probably listened to it dozens of times now
Damn. Honestly being the “gifted kid” ties you down to always being the role model and having others compared to you. In a sense, I feel guilty for the insecurity of other because me being “gifted” is their expectations. I feel like I can’t breathe with how much everything is being shoved down my back because a simple B isn’t good enough and that prones me to nasty remarks and a shrug when it’s A’s. Honestly it’s just a lose lose situation :( It’s also a nightmare being teased for not getting a higher grade on tests because you’re known for acing everything perfect or not passing a subject-or not meeting those expectations.
I'm the gifted kid because I never get enough attention from people around me. It's always my siblings. Being the middle child sucks. I want to drop being the best but then I'll go back to being worthless and unworthy of people's love. I hate this. I'm just stuck.
The world is collapsing and nothing makes sense anymore
Vent? Sorry, I'll delete if you want.
I'm not called gifted by teachers, but damn. I alway hear my family calling me gifted, and to keep it up to get scholarships; I live in a low income family (single mom). And I want to keep it up but I almost failed my math class, which is a class you have to get good on to be able to pass, but was able to pull it up to an A because I took A BUNCH of extra credit shit. It stressed me out so much. I had to have my mother check my grades every night, or I would cry all night. I just want to keep my perfect image in my family's eyes. I just want to be able to help my mother so badly. I'm sorry for venting, this has been on my mind for months.
I feel this pretty well.
I get outcluded because I am responsible.
Sometimes my "friends" use me only to not do any work.
I have to deal with teachers and people when I get a single thing wrong.
I get stressed when I start getting things wrong and can't emotionally take it.
Everyone sets their expectations too high.
I am expected to be the perfect student.
And that is only because I understand things right away and get only A+/100 when grading.
People are tiring, and I don't feel comfortable with almost anyone. There are only high, like really high expectations. Nothing else. I feel really bad. But still wear the happy face, because no one actually gets it.
I need a break from everyone. But I keep getting called asocial because I am inside my room.
i'm the youngest in my family and i'm the "gifted kid". bc both my older siblings couldn't reach my parents' expectations, i'm now being pressured by them since i'm their "last hope" and "smarter" than my older siblings. but i'm just burnt out, i just want to give up even drop out of school but ofc i can't do that. since my grades started dropping life has just been getting harder and harder and idk how much longer i can take it
I'm not A gifted kid but I am in special Ed and burned out.
This playlist right here reminds me so much how it is, and that I have like four more years of this to do before I graduate.
I have had special Ed classes since I was 3rd grade and now I'm 16 years old and 2 more years left and I'm totally burnt out.
I relate to the "Oh No!" lyrics so much.
I miss my old self, a child who studied beautifully, was the best, her parents loved her, enjoyed everything after the 3rd grade I'm not the same now they require more and more...
i used to get some, good grades, my parents were happy, i got a lot of praise, but since i turn into junior high schooler, my grades just, start to drop, my mental not stable ig, and i think that my parents actually mad because i'm not have a good grade again, but they cover they anger by saying "we both don't really care about those grades", and i rarely got those praises for me, in order not to disappoint my parents, i hide my grades tests so they wouldn't mad or disappointed at me
I used to be the top of my class till i hit 6th grade. I used to get good grades because the things were so easy, i didnt have to even study. But when i entered 6th grade the subjects got hard, so i needed to study. Keep in mind i didnt study all those years so i had no knowledge of studying. I used to get 99% in all but my grades dropped to 91%. Everyone expected the best from me and i hated it. I knew i wasnt good enough. I saw people get better grades than me and my heart shattered. Seeing all those people disappointed in me made me so stressed that i got constant headaches from stress. My grades arent getting better and now no one cares about me being burnt out.
I've been burnt out for a while. I used to always get above 90. On everything. I've gotten so tired of being expected to be the best or the most successful. Honestly I'm kind of glad i'm not only getting a's now. I'm not perfect like you want me to be mom, sisters, my family.
Back then i used to be “the perfect kid” respect my parents, always top in class, good attitude and a innocent christian who prayed everyday. Now my grades would either randomly go up and down, always “TalKiNg BaCk” to my parents, behind or just normal in class and having a dirty mind and rarely pray, and a bonus anger issues
I stopped feeling the want for toys or happiness to young, I was always the mature kid the one who was amazing at her school subjects.
It all dropped, everything failed.
My friends left me because I talked to much about certain subjects, My newer friends left me because I wouldn't talk about what I liked and when I complained about school I was the " dramatic one ".
When I started Secondary school I had so many friends, amazing grades and even people who looked up to me.
I now regret everything, For who am I if I don't have all those things.
Let me drag you into my web of lies once more, The lies of my beliefs,personality,friends even my family relationships.
Why did my cousin start to become distant?, why did she leave me again?.
I showed her.
I showed her myself, Not my throne placed on lies, But the 7 year old child who's crying after getting kicked out of her house because she got a 73% on a maths percentage test!.
The little child who yearns to be free.
How can I go back. How can I stop myself from showing her once again?.
Why do they never stop?.
Why can't I go on my Phone?, Oh, My grades dropped I see.
2 days without sleep.
I'm the attention seeker don't worry, If I finally can quell the thirst to prove myself I'll stop.
No?.
Well that makes 2 of us, we both know it won't stop.
This pain that is living.
This torture that is expectations.
This cruel thing called love.
Is all really fair in love and war?, No?.
I already knew that.
I can still have at least a sliver of hope that the life I dream for, the person I wish to be.
I can have the hope I can reach that goal.
How much longer do I have to wait?.
My emotions are leaving me..
That's meant to be good right!?.
I can finally stop caring for them.
It's not toxic I know it isn't.
It's me being fooled again, except this time by myself.
:).
This hit really hard, but it will get better ! I don't usually talk so it's kinda hard telling you what i really want to tell you (overthinking again..) so i'll make it short, it's already long, i really Hope it gets better and you achieve it ! Good Luck, i'm here to talk. Hope you have a better life!
The saddest thing for me is that when I was at my worst burnout, I listened to these songs on repeat all the time.
After 2 years since then, I found this playlist. about 6 months ago, I had my second worst burnout.
I mean, it's getting better. Time passes, you learn that you are not equal to grades, people's opinions, your parents' expectations. Sometimes you have to cut all ties to feel completely free, it's worth it. And at the end of the day you look at what you've already done, what you've already achieved. And you're worth it. But you're still more than any accomplishment. You're just an interesting, charming, intelligent person.
I’m not a gifted kid, but I’m so sorry for those who relate to this.
I've been perfect all my life and lived my parents fantasies and the second I get a A- my phone gets taken away. The urge of always being first but never appreciated for the pain and the sleep I've lost for 14 years. Yet when I want to have time for myself and have a life I get put in homeschooling because my parents say that everyone else around me is making me fail. Because I'm just not good enough for them if I fail. Try to talking to them but they are working. No friends and no socializing just working on collage in 7th grade. I have 2 degrees already and my parents don't think that's enough. Nothing I do is ever good enough. For anyone. So I start watching horror movies to make me feel numb because I'm sick and tired of the pain everyone puts me though its exhausting. I cant be suicidal because I raised my siblings older and younger. My life is falling apart and there is nothing I can do about it because I'm always there for everyone else but no ones there for me. I helped my siblings through puberty and depression and fruit ninja. I'm the middle child whenever one of my siblings get something done they are praised by my parents but after I clean the whole house, take care of the dogs, help my siblings w their homework before mine, take care of my special needs brother. Feed them. And yet my parents are on their phone arguing to their hearts content. No matter how hard I try everyone is better then me in any way. I'm blabbering but I don't care because you cant tell me to hide my emotions anymore. I had NO childhood. After getting bullied for 6 years and moving every 3 years my loneliness is so deep I'm drowning. I had an argument with my parents and I said "its my life give me a choice" and they said "actually no its not you life you have no choice." IM TRYING SO HARD TO BE HAPPY IM SO DESPERATE BUT NO BODY IS MAKING THAT POSSIBLE FOR ME. At this point I cant be in my room alone for 8 minutes for someone to come in and get mad at me for "not helping out around the house" yeah? who did the laundry, dogs, trash, dishes, tidying up, farm, give pills, and vacuum EVERY GODDAMN ROOM IN MY MF HOUSE BUT STILL IM NOT GOOD ENOUGH. Tell my parents I want to cut/dye my hair they say "you cannot do that my reputation at work would be ruined. I'm just working to pay for your collage. You need more scholarships." NO I DONT. ALL I WANT IS FOR YOU TO REALIZE THERE IS MORE TO LIFE THEN CHORES AND SUFFERING JUST LET ME BE A KID FOR ONCE IN MY FUCKING LIFE. I have scars from bullying and I feel so numb. I passed out two days ago and my parents don't care. I broke my fingers from working to hard on 9 ESSAYS FOR COLLAGE WHEN IM IN 7TH GRADE LIKE WOW NO SHIT PRESSURE WTF DO YOU MEAN. "You're exaggerating." No I'm not. "In this family we are leaders." I DONT WANT TO BE A SHITTY LEADER I JUST WANT TO FIT IN AND HAVE FRIENDS LIKE A NORMAL KID. AT THIS POINT I WISH WE WERE POOR.
I feel like im the worst but act like im the best
rlly hit
I burnt out for a few months 1 grade ago, got my shit together once I got in a school whose tuition was 100k, I knew I had to do something, I had to ace it, I had to make everything perfect. I've always been a smart student, whether I put effort or not I'd do good regardless. I never put that much effort but now I'm determined, I'll obliterate this shit.
they ask me why im so negative, why i think others are better than me and i assume i dont get the perfect score. theyre also the ones who compare me to other kids, theyre also the ones who show the negative side in the good times, and always say that its sad/dissapointing that i got 19/20 Aand not one more point to get 20/20
I don't know if I'm a gifted child, but people around me think I'm special? possible? I don't like people who think I'm too special
I never EVER opened up to my bestfriends. Let alone just friends. My body is now automatically locks in any tears when I come inside my school inside my eyes. Only when I come back home, I lock my room door and scream and cry about every day. I haven’t been spotted crying in school for 5 years straight all because of my stupid confidence. Sorry for the vent -_-
Ima be honest,, I burnt myself out- For 3 years now,, I’m in middle school getting to highschool soon, whenever I get lower then A I push my self overboard. No one expects me to do my best, but I DO,, I always expect myself to be a high achiever. No matter what ever since I started middle school my grades started falling, which cause me to panic making me push myself just to on top of everyone again,, making me miserable in the process. I’m not sure why I push myself, it’s been a habit ever since I moved with my grandma and her kids/my aunt/uncle - no one’s ever stopped me nor told me to calm down which caused me to hurt my mental health and myself, of course it’s sorta my own fault. Tho ever since my grades got lower my family noticed which caused them to start pushing it on me, I’m not praised like how I was when I was younger. I get judged and notice by the single up perfect ness, or smt like that idk,,- So yea, I’m just listening to this playlist while studying at 2 am in the morningggg Yeyy-
i was six years old when my school made me get to a higher level (i’m sure you know what i mean i just don’t know how to say it in english lol) because apparently everything came too easy to me, and i already knew how to read because i learned by myself before first grade. honestly, until the 10th grade, my grades were pretty good. but i massively failed the 11th grade. i lost all motivation and all hope, i truly did not care about my life and future. i had the equivalent of F all the time (except when i cheated). I didn’t know myself anymore and felt completely worthless, because ever since i was a kid i was taught that my grades are the one thing supposed to make me happy and proud. that they are who i am. that’s bullshit. i am more than that. after a hell of a year i got the opportunity to re-do that 11th year in a different high school. this was the best thing that ever happened to me. fun fact: my beloved therapist got me to do an IQ test which confirmed my giftedness. i’m only sharing this part because i believe it helped me understand why all this was happening to me. anyways. so i got into ✨that new school✨ and i truly became a better version of me there. i got better grades. really good grades. and while that made me happy, i had other things there that made me even happier. friends, teachers, family. i was so healthier. i am still learning how to navigate in this world, but i know for sure that i am capable, i am worthy of happiness, and it gets better. please don’t give up on yourself even when you feel like it’s all over. the world keeps turning and we’re all here in this together. we got this, and we got each other. much love to everyone
Sometimes it feels like I'm not allowed to vent or feel sad because im not depressed or suicidal (even though alot of my OC's are) and i just feel this weird imposter syndrom where im not sad enough to express it because my only real difference from the average preteen girl is my ADHD and even then it's mostly maskable despite the whole burning out thing. And i found a thing i relate to and can vent to, and everyone else feels worse and i feel guilty for relating to it at all because i want to live a long and happy life and am actually kinda scared of death and its only my teachers who insist I've lost my potential and my mom has repeatedly affirmed she'll still care for me and it's more of an internal thing
I had a Burnt out two years ago, and now i thought that it was over but i guess there are some of it left in me. i get lazy when I'm class so i easily forget the topic, so whenever my dad asks me about my topic, i panic and keep trying to find the topic in my head but it won't appear so i end up not sayign anything, this continued a lot of times until my dad had enough and now he's been asking me "How the hell did you turn out like this?" and that question has been stuck in my head. Sometimes i want to vent to someone or something but i guess i keep telling myself to not do it because i shouldn't act like I'm the one who's hurting when its actually the people around me that's hurting. And whenever i wanted to ask for help or jsut for someone to listen, they just change the topic because the topic was getting heavy, of course im not going to push them, since im not a victim after all, im just being dramatic and lazy.
A couple weeks ago, I had a giant meltdown because I was feeling so overwhelmed and pressured. This playlist perfectly describes how I felt
“Natural at everything” is tiring . I like these playlists
This playlist is perfect. I was considered gifted and then got sent to a gifted school over my summers. Ye some of it was fun but it was also torture. I never had time to hangout with my friends. I have to go to a church every single Wednesday and I have to do my homework and study before I can even touch my phone. I’m getting b’s and I feel like a failure and I’m just spiraling out of control. I can’t tell my parents or friends. And whenever I would get a bad grade or get something wrong I would get made fun of and they made me feel like shit. It’s hard. And now I have anxiety, social anxiety, depression and A.D.D. People think I’m perfect and rich when I am not. I just seem happy at school. But recently I havnt been able to get answers right and I made a mistake for a simple math problem infront of the whole class and they all laughed. I couldn’t figure out a problem in math one day and people started snickering and whispering. I’m science I kept stuttering with my answer because I was unsure and got laughed and stared at. In ELA I made a huge grammar mistake… twice. And that’s only today. And much more.. my friends are leaving me. Or atleast it feels like it because latley they don’t talk to me or hangout anymore. Or just simply ignore me. I’m burned out and no one understands except my chior teacher. She lets me take mental health days. She’s my favourite❤
More to add if you wanna read more.
But I am burned out because the expectations just keep piling and piling and I’m gonna break soon. I’m breaking out because my diet is so bad and I’m so stressed people hate me for “being annoying” when I don’t talk, at all. Reading and music is my only escape. I know it’s not my friends faults but I can’t trust any one of them. And I randomly get mad at them because all my emotions are started to break out. I hate myself but I then again hate everyone else except myself. I hate being the “perfect” girl. I have gotten into trouble with the cops latley and bad grades and been making mistakes. And no one can see it’s because of the stress and burdens I have had since 1st grade. But yell at me and/or ghost me. Parents yell, teachers yell, students tell, and friends tell aswell. (Yes I mean tell not yell for the students and friends) and I recently broke up. Latley I’m a nervous reck and almost everyone I’ve liked I don’t actually LIKE I’m just desperate for some love from someone. All I do is try my best. But I can’t get even a bit of the dedication back from someone else. All they do is blame me for everything because I’m so easy to walk over. People call me a failure at school and I have to laugh at jokes and not break down crying. I am a train wreck.
I'm sorry. That sounds like...
It's hard to put into words. But I'm sorry that's what you have to go through. I don't know that there are real solutions to that.
It sounds cliche, but have you tried journaling? I got one for like $5 at Walgreens, and it's nice to write down your thoughts and struggles sometimes. Also, you can rip it into tiny pieces once you're done and it's really satisfying.
Also, fun fact! B's aren't technically failing. My brain (and, if I had to guess, yours too) says 100% is 'yeah, I did fine' and 90% is 'might as well go die in a hole now', but it's a lie.
Something else that sort of helped me is basically telling yourself that the anxiety and depression and all that are like separate entities living in your brain. So when I think 'I totally failed that test and it's going to drop my grade so much' I tell myself, 'nope, that's just your anxiety speaking'. And then you don't interact with it any more than that, because getting in a fight with your anxiety isn't something you want to do.
On the other hand, that technique doesn't really work for my depression so much, because it's a lot easier to slip into that thought pattern without noticing.
Also, consider getting therapy. It's usually really expensive, but if your school has some sort of counseling service, take full advantage of that.
If it helps, I'll be your friend.
@@lilithreusch2614 this made me tear up, thank you for even taking the time to write that. I will have to think about buying a journal and writing it down. Also that thing with anxiety and stuff being a different entity makes a bit of sense. I appreciate that you took time out of your day to tell me this :) I’m so happy someone cares :) thank you.
when i was little i just made a slide full of frushtrashins and set to remind you in a year and reflect i do it every year
As a “gifted kid” I can totally relate to this, everyone expecting so much of you then to crack and be looked down upon. I hate it
i'm not gifted but i do better than most but i work maddeningly hard to be as good as i am now yet STILL there is people effortlessly better than me and i never get recognition for what i do even if doing it kills me mentally. even if i don't sleep for a week trying to revise for tests other people are ALWAYS better and i'm sick of trying to beat people who effortlessly better than me. better grades, better drawings, better at sport, better at singing, better at acting, reads more, better at wrighting, better at talking, better at everything. apparently everyone has something there good at but the thing is i can't do anything. there's always someone better. i can't be bothered anymore.
THIS IS SO REALLLL AAHHH
I am starting to burnout this year. I'm a sophmore in high school, and I'm terrified that I won't get anywhere in life, yet I'll feel some sense of relief from not being up top. I'm neurodivergent and it's SO! DAMN! HARD! TO! COPE! when nobody knows or cares what that even means. I'm only just finding answers when things are starting to go downhill and I am so, so afraid.
I’m an A+ student but there are many of those at my old school last year. Me and Micah would work our asses off but Dalton would get all of the honor. I burnt out from trying. I got nothing, NOTHING. Micah got NOTHING. Some other gifted kids get everything but we seemed overlooked. I hate when teachers pick their favorite student and make it obvious. Maybe if I was Dalton I would be better liked, honored, loved. Though, I never earned honor even for how hard I worked. I never liked school last year because of “no accomplishments”. It wasn’t my fault I got nothing, it wasn’t Micah’s fault he got nothing, it wasn’t even Daltons fault. It was the teachers that made Dalton the “star” of the school.
used to be good at anything, school, life, friendship, everything. now ? a failure, everything. Can i go back ? where am i praised, pretty, clever, is that so hard ?
Top of my school defines my persona when I'm at school :,)
So it’s not just me :,)
@@tamakiamajiki5039 nah bestie you're not alone in this :,) but hey, we'll make it through, our academics don't define us as people
I really love of this playlist! I don't skip any songs because all of them are so relatable and good. Thank you for making this!❤
when they say they'll support you but when your grades dropped, so did their sympathy.
You're being so real,like if you're not successful you're not valuable,lovable,wanted or appreciated.
As a child of a man who had straight a's his whole life, when I started reading at a third grade reading level in kindergarten I've been forced to keep it up, it's 3am and I'm working on all of my assignments so I can't make home happy... I can't do it anymore it's getting to hard 😻
I know what this feels like.
I've been burned out since last year and I've been suicidal more than once
I tried my best still and I believed if I didn't have straight A's I would fail at life
I'm currently losing my motivation to even make it to high school but I know I have to live. We all do. You can only live this life once, why waste it?
In other words, keep going and do what's best for you. Don't do what I did and keep going until you break in a trillion pieces.
Live for me, at least
Amazing playlist btw 💕
Can’t be the only gifted kid that is burnout and wants to speak up about so much stuff but never does because they know the consequences and overthinks it until they just give up on the issue because they are middle school age and teachers and adults say that we are just being crazy and don’t know what we are talking about because we are kids and being taught that there is only one right answer to everything even though they are correct and the adults are wrong. 😐
They'll think it's a phase too. It sucks
I love my worth being based upon my grades. And then my depression from feeling worthless for failure is looked over and I’m scolded for not making my parents look like good parents for being a failure.
I’m a bit late to this but oh well, it’s a good playlist
Isn't it funny how we feel safer when talking bunch of random people our problems and these people understanding our problems but we don't feel safe telling our own parents or siblings.
grades: rising
self satisfaction: rising
parent proudness: rising
likelyhood of harvard: rising
height of goals: rising
time studying: rising
anxiety: rising
amount of aps: rising
risk of burnout: rising
I'm a gifted kid in an all gifted family and I am failing and never have gotten a c and currently have a e and report cards go out soon I can't raise the grade I'm going to get my phone taken away and forced to sit at the table and contemplate why I'm such a failure when they go out for 2 months
Can relate because all my life I've been an honor student but when Grade 4 came I was rejected by my crush and I was so naive and sensitive at that time so I lost focus on my studies and lost my honor role now I'm trying my very best to get it back but no one sees it, they never notice my progress and improvements and even my own family thinks I'm stupid because everyone in my family before were overachiever valedictorians/honor students and I'm just someone with average grades. And wanting to go to other schools because their standards are lower there but my fam wont allow it because the standards in my school are high, yet they have the audacity to complain when I don't have an honor role
I have been a gifted kid ever since I can remember, always being part of the students with the highest grades. But at what cost? I rarely had friends, I was always stressed about getting a grade lower than an A+. Being a gifted kid is horrible, it's like you sold your soul to be like this without even you knowing. Everyone now has extreme expectations for me, it's like I had to sell my childhood just to end up in suffering. I never managed to experience childhood, I never manage to experience finding out who I am. I just ended up seeing myself as a body, a body that only knows how to copy people's positive actions and reactions. I don't know what are emotions, I never felt them I only do what I think is good for my future. I'm only a puppet of my mother who does whatever she wants to, she wants me to live her dreams she couldn't achieve? Then I'll have to do it. I honestly have given up on many of my dreams if not every single one. And yet I still let people down, "I lost you on 4th grade!" "You were never like this it must have been _ who influenced you" "What did I do wrong for you to end up like this?" I don't know woman, maybe I started to realize I don't feel emotions and have no personality or whatever people feel at that point in my life. To be honest, I have told how I feel no emotions to some "friends", they wanted to help me so I started faking positive results but in the end, I still have no emotion or a personality. I'm a mirror of sorts, the only thing that I haven't copied from other people are my interests. So yeah I never wish other people to be gifted kids since they are the first ones to experience burnout and trust me, not all of us recover from it.
I feel this. I was always the smart kid.
Pandemic kinda messed me up tho
I'm doing better now, I like my life now.
I just realized that I've been replaying this playlist for almost 2 year's from now on... And this is totally I've feel right now.. im scared to tell them that I can't do what they're expecting me to do for them..
I'm gifted(I think), I have good grades, I act like a perfectionist, but now it stopped I don't have the energy to study, or even get sleep. if I study too much I get no sleep if I try to sleep I can't study much.
idk what happened to me. my parents asked why I don't smile anymore, and why I looked so tired I said I was fine...I thought I was...I thought it was me that I became this. but it was school my parents and tutors. and now I don't have straight A's I have A's and B's and I'm stressing over it
In my childhood I was the intelligent kid always being diligent and always obligated to do whatever my mom wished me to do so.
I read and read and consumed knowledge from the world. I enjoyed reading and thinking (god I was so creative /innovative when i was younger and much more better). I loved thinking too much I would get lost in my thoughts and had no spot for playing with other children my age or no idea of the other children's concept of fun.
My schedule was always packed. For instance before I go to school I always had to revise /run through over the whole notes and study the outside knowledge such as reading books on how to socialize (since my mother liked to show me off to her friends and relatives saying how smart I am and my high grades. "xxx is a clever child") and how to become wiser and self study on English which no one really bothered doing in my elementary school at the time.
I read books that adults usually read. I was a curious child and I had amazing visualization so I found joy in making use of it. I would talk to myself alone. Write in my diary. Make up plot lines and predict people. Analyze my surroundings and people.
I never really had such that I could call as friends but I didn't care much. I regardedthem as 'childish' even tho I was the youngest of them all.
No one really tried to befriend me either (except for one cerntain girl) since I looked intimidating and quiet (some confessed that I looked like a psychopath later on) and was usually the 'overacheiver ' so no one really talked to me unless they want my help on something or my notes.
I really loved my mother's showing off so I tried harder.
Since she had never praised me since as far as I can remember I craved for the indirect praises (or which i deemed them to be).
But then I got burnt out. I scored my first B ever on maths and got beaten up with the hanger. I tried harder but it didn't really work.In fact it got worse I was on the verge of su!c!d3 and self hate and called myself a disappointment mentally.
My creativity ran out and my vocabulary isn't expanding. I got diagnosed with ADHD and had mental issues.
I'm ashamed to say I'm still stuck in the burn out.
Tho I changed schools and gradually became better. (set Straight A* score on science and english and computer science and A for maths for a year but full marks were only if I get lucky).
I'm now stuck on 23 up to 24.5/25 score.
I hope everyone who's going through a burnout can get over it. Don't be harsh on yourself:). Together we can get throught this.
To me, it isn’t gifted to be “gifted”, it’s like you were gifted with a curse when u were born, having a high or even impossible expectation. Some ppl don’t know the pressure on those who are gifted, even if no one is pressuring them. It’s not fun to be gifted. Yea it was fun at first knowing I wasn’t average I was “smarter” but now knowing I’m supposed to be “smarter” when I could belong in the average is just disappointing. And I’ve heard ppl say it’s not fun to be “dumb” either, as ppl don’t expect they have potential or that they just pressure themselves a lot just to show that they are worth it. Then there’s those who are “average”, ur just average, u might have potential, u might not. They worry more about those who are “smarter” or “dumber” cause they are those who need more help to either “spread their wings” or “get them to at least pass” and then it’s just the “average” ppl, basically being like a middle child. The overall reason of all of this is school, let’s be honest. Ur either dumb or smart, in between no one cares abt u. Dumb ur too “fragile”. Smart you are perfect, if u fail they won’t be there. It’s messed up that were being defined as a person based of numbers and disgusting
I feel nothing anymore everyone around me is already planning for me to fail which gives me zero motivation for the future. I just wanna give up already.
never been a straight a student or anything but I used to be one of the best in class and Ive definitely never had to study much to be okay in school (I learned quickly and was really curious and all) which is now kicking my ass in high school (the stress mostly my grades are still fine but i always get the "so much wasted potential" shit and all) sometimes I wish I was worse at school but I cannot bring myself to not care if that makes sense (also i live in Germany and our school system is probably kinda different)
I swear i blinked for one fucking second, and all of a sudden i lost every single aspect of control i had. Like it just hit me my avarage is a 73% and i am going fucking insane.
I’m so glad that there are people like me! :D You know sometimes I wish my grades were bad, but if my grades were bad then my mother would probably kill me. I love the very little attention I earn from others at school, but it makes me feel like I have to do good in everything. Also, as a so called “intelligent” person, I’m extremely quiet. As a result, I can’t speak up and then I feel like I’m pressured to talk. It makes me shake. As a burnt out gifted kid, you’re always going to experience the expectations that are even higher, someone immediately commenting on your grades when As turn into an A-, having performance anxiety, being embarrassed when you make a simple mistake that many people make, people talking about you like you’re not even there, huge amounts of stress, drawing on paper and then erasing it because you fear the teacher may see it and feeling like you only come to school to just be pressured. There’s more but that’s all I’m going to name. :) Because my mother expects As, she yelled at me and my brother to get our grades up and said we should be grateful we have a roof over our head and food on our plate. Surprisingly, I still have good grades as a burnt out gifted kid, so I’m not dead yet, at least. But I’m sure my grades will fall apart sooner or later. So, wish me luck in school because I will definitely need it. “I am disappointed in you.” It’s a common thing to hear for people like us. < / 3!
I'm gifted in making lines look good on paper and,creative writing