My cousin is a paramedic in NYC and he’s told me some of the most ridiculous stories about why people call 911. It’s really scary how some of these people live day to day
Your comment reminded me of my first and only time to the US (it was NYC). The whole trip was normal and great, with the exception of some seemingly roided out black dude who came up to me whilst I was with my gf at a busy crossing, bragging about how he was like a superhero and how my gf would prefer me if I lifted. He gave the vibes of being single and frustrated, but most of all that he was high and/or crazy, which was kinda hilarious.
For anyone reading, if you accidentally call 911, DO NOT HANG UP. The responders will think something bad has happened and dispatch. STAY ON THE LINE, and then tell them that it was a mistake. You won't get in trouble for doing that.
A guy in the uk called an ambulance because he legs turned blue. After they took him to the emergency room. It turned out he was wearing new jeans and the dye had leaked on to his legs. 😂😂
I heard of a guy who went to the dr because he had an erection that lasted longer than 4 hours, the dr did a bunch of blood work, then asked him if he took any pills for that or otherwise any other meds, dude said no. So the dr scheduled him for a mri immediately. When dude was getting ready to be put in the mri they said the usual, please remove all clothing with zippers buttons, rivits or anything metal at all on them, remove all jewelry and if you have a pacemaker or any rods, plates or staples surgically implanted let it be known immediately otherwise it will result in injury or possibly death. Dude says "oh shit, do i have to take off my cock ring now?" Case closed...
Or a head nurse i talked to in the obstetrics and gynecology dept who said every week she gets at least one female who comes in for an std/ infection check and had lost a tampon, figured it just fell out so she just puts another in and the nurse has to get out the pussy spreaders and dig that nasty, decomposing, rotten ass tampon and put it in 4 biohazard bags to try and stop the smell from stinking up the whole place for hours... said one older lady had 4 up in there and actually got a blood infection and later died from it.. said her fuckin insides were eaten away and almost fully closed from all the scab and exposed tissue trying to heal itself... said when she opened her legs the entire wing of the hospital had to be closed from the smell alone.. said all the staff were puking everywhere and other patients were n all.. fuck, that, job... in the butt...
What I immediately thought was "well, most teens are idiots because they are teens, this one came by it honestly - through genetics." That was pretty funny, but I also felt bad for laughing.
I did mold removal for 8months and once while bringing a client down to show where the mold was, she asked "Well how do you know its not a good mold?" 🤦
I love how much popularity he has gained in recent years. I've been a big fan of his from the beginning and it's awesome to see him come into the spot light, as he has.
The lady asking for 'blow', meaning pot, at a liquor store... that's just adorable. She was clearly risking humiliation, just to get some weed for a friend. I bet she's lovely.
@@patsmightymovers3885 For sure. Maybe my comment wasn't clear enough- I was saying that if she called pot 'blow', she was obviously not a smoker so she must have been doing a favour for a friend. I think Bill actually said that.
@@mikem1006 I used to make blinker fluid jokes all the time. I didn't realize that my daughter didn't know I was joking, and as an adult, actually asked for it. When she told me, I could not stop laughing. It was so funny and so sad at the same time. It's still funny.
I worked in a record store. This happened all the time. Customer: I was driving in my car and heard this great song on the radio. What was it? Me: Did you catch who it was by, the chorus, any of the lyrics, even a genre? Customer: No. I have no way whatsoever of describing it. Me: (screaming internally) We can try calling the station to ask. Which station and when did they play it? Customer: I don't know what station, but it was just on. Me: Can you go to your car and check what station it was? Customer: No, I'm not doing that. You should know what song it was. Me: Yes, clearly my mistake has been not keeping an up to the minute playlist of every radio station in this city, just on the off chance someone who doesn't know what radio station they listen to hears a song they like, but can't be bothered to see if the DJ names the song or the band once it's finished, or even picks up the hook line of the chorus. There are many reasons to quit this job, but chief among them is obviously my inability to do everything for adult babies who can't do a single thing to help themselves navigate a world so complicated that even the lyrics of nauseatingly repetitive radio songs defy comprehension.
In defense of those idiots, I've been tempted to ask too (but kept my mouth shut). A bunch of contractors/construction workers come in the store wearing their visibility vests. I usually try to find the scrawniest dude who obviously doesn't work construction just to be sure.
@@SuperReviews4you That's true, but I guess some people get used to certain phrasing, or maybe they asked someone for help once that didn't actually work in the place? I've had the same question while stocking shelves, but then we do have outside vendors that do the same but don't work in the store. Still not as bad as asking for sneakers in an Apple store...
I love how it literally caught him off guard and mind fucked him, the statement about Pearl harbor. If I'm being honest, it kind of did the same thing to me. I yelled What the fuck simultaneously with him. The fact that any person could say think that is utterly horrifying
I worked at an auto parts store once and a gentleman comes in and asks for a part for a pontiac "Goolie". After very confused looks, my coworkers and I went out to the parking lot to see this pontiac "Goolie". The joy on our faces when we saw a burgundy pontiac 6000 LE. life's all about the little moments.
I used to manage a movie theater. A woman once came in asking for her free ticket to see some PG movie. I told her there were no free tickets, they cost $8.00. Her response: “I thought I got a free ticket if I volunteered to be a kid’s parental guidance”. The lady legitimately didn’t understand how movie ratings worked.
"where is the nearest butcher?Did you know ?spread a lil liverworst in a few key areas the dog goes nuts,but we cant get the cat trained"-Random Customer and wife at my job..
I used to work in a small restaurant in the South End of Boston. One day some LAY-DEE ordered a vanilla and grape nuts frozen yogurt. When I gave it to her she looked at it and asked what the topping was, grape nuts which is what she ordered I told her. Her response: "Oh I thought it was gonna be artificial grape" verbatum
When bill says ..what the fuck .. after the 40 year old asks about choking I died . Hes so readable without video you just can see his face I love it .
How do you "understand" time zones and yet fail sooo hard when applying that knowledge? Must be one of the top 3 dumbest question/statements of all time!!
Working in medical can confirm shit like that happens a lot. People ask why they coughed and what can we do to help them, even if they hadn't coughed since which was days ago.
OMG i can't hardly wait. Bill says this is 🍎 store employees and he said these are all gonna be me 🤣🤣🤣me too, Bill, me too LMAO 🤣 😂 I love this category so much
@@JaySparky I live in Ontario (Canada), and have never heard that phrase. What's the origin? Our liquor stores are controlled by the provincial governments. In Ontario, it's the LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario). My brother refers to it as "his favourite Mexican, El Ceebio".
When I worked at a Verizon call center, a woman called in because her internet card wasn't working. I asked her to turn it on to start troubleshooting. That was the reason why it wasn't working. It was off.
That one's not so strange. When you're about to enquire about something on the telephone you might have a lot on your mind, questions, keeping stuff in order. Not to mention anxiety, so they might not always immediately memorize the location based purely off of a greeting. Even more so with the older folks. I do see your point somewhat though, considering that usually when you look up a phone # these days you can see the location on a map etc via google and all that. But again, old folks lol God bless em
@@MjTaboret the same kkkjkkkjgghyyyyuyuhuyyuyyytyyyttyytguuiiiiiu as a tester for the invite but I think I can make it to the park and get back to you on that one and the other two are the same as the year to you and your family ytrgyyrtr et rrtrrrerrrdfhtu I love you return to ashleyhomestore.ca/products/skempton-dining-room-table-set-7cn on The ygrdttf window and saw it was on the phone 📱📱 to the park and📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱 tttt to the park you guys are doing well and that you are doing the right thing to do the📱📱📱 truthy the
I was a butcher in a supermarket. Thanksgiving time an older sounding woman called us and asked if the turkey she bought would fit in her oven. I told her I don't know, I've never seen your oven. Imagine looking at a turkey, looking at your oven, having doubts and calling the supermarket. I shit you not, when I told her to try putting the turkey in the oven to check, she told me "oh no I don't want to cook it until Thanksgiving" I actually had to tell an adult that the oven didn't have to be on to check if a turkey will fit in it.
Telecom company and a client had sent a wrong address for Colorado when, in fact, the site address was in California. I'm in Colorado and got the dispatch, but figured it out and notified the client and customer. I then call into dispatch/completion and this girl keeps asking me "yes, I understand that it wasn't your vicinity, but you still won't answer if you used any parts off your truck". Unbelievable.
Actually, now that you mention it, that is a good point about the paternal test (the very last question on this video). The assumption when asking that question is that it would be obvious while the woman is carrying the baby during pregnancy is that she is the mother. But what about a 5 year old girl standing next to an adult woman on the street. How can one prove the woman is indeed the biological mother?
In England we have a supermarket store called poundland, basically everything their is a pound. As a young teen me and a friends used to pick something up and ask how much it is for giggles
i like how bill burr reads, it's like a 5 grader that did not prepared his homework, and now is in front of the class reading for the first time immanuel kant. has no idea what he reads but he is failing at making it sound fluent. like throwing bricks in a washing machine.
To be fair maternity tests do exist, they're just really rare. Imagine a surrogate mother who had another woman's baby via IVF claiming that it's actually hers for example. Or for adoptions and babies that got switched at birth. Very limited use case but it does happen
Those iPhone store question are mostly only dumb to iPhone store employees. I’m very tech savvy and always have been, but those questions weren’t even really dumb. They just work in the store and know everything about all their crap, and expect others to too. If someone’s never owned an iPhone, and buys one, HOW would they know the thing on the side turns the ringer on and off. Unless they read the entire direction booklet. Which no one does. But with the thousands of other things to learn on that phone if ur new to it, how would they know that is what I’m asking? Or anything about the phone really. Sorry, those questions weren’t dumb at all.
I work at a boutique liquor store too in los Angeles CA but we carry everything down to the crap beer and tons of wine and high end rare liquor. I can attest to all the dumbass shit people ask for. One time I had a person ask me if we sell weed and said "hey y'all should sell weed too, you will make a killing" I laughed and said sorry bro that's illegal. Another time I literally had a guy so drunk he was making out the one of the beer doors full on tongue and all late at night. I refused service and kicked him out. I went to follow him out and this dude walked across the street and got into a van and tried to drive away. He went about 10 feet and stopped. Luckily a cop pull up to the stop sign adjacent to the store. So I waved them down and said to them what happened and the arrested the dude for a DUI. If he was able to drive away he probably would've killed himself or God forbid someone else.
Worked at a stereo store many years ago. A guy comes in & asks if we had a particular cartridge for his turntable. Yes,. How much? $75. Jesus! I can get the same one down the street for $50. So go get it there. They're out of stock. Well if I was out of stock, I'd sell it to you for $40. Really?!
lol it's funny I just had a situation play out like that at a Hotel where I work. It's a Friday night and this guy is like "So and so is selling em for like this much $$ etc etc." I'm just like "Okay, that's a pretty good deal for a weekend, you should go take that one then." haha I know it's just a negotiating tactic but I've been doing it so long I just cut straight to the point now lol
I worked in a Joe's Crab Shack in Tulsa Oklahoma I had a person asked me hey if I order the oysters on a half shell are they going to turn my mouth black. Last time I came in here I ate them and my mouth turn to mud. My question is why on God's Earth would you go to a place again
Took a friend to a huge Dollar Tree. She had never been to one before and was really into seeing the things there. Time after time she kept picking up a product and saying excitedly "How much is this?" "A dollar Judy, it's the dollar store."
As the planet rotates east to west California would not be aware of A attack on pearl harbor until someone called from Hawaii to inform them. 2 hours ahead.
You can’t get mad, it says “genius” on your shirt.
Killed me
Love how Billy Dingbat does the segment, forgets the segment and then remembers to name the segment after he's midway through with it
Its gold 👌
V
@Matthew Boyce to be honest such a statement deserves more palms
Lmaoooo
The teacher who brought the kids outside during a tornado drill was the funniest one imo
My cousin is a paramedic in NYC and he’s told me some of the most ridiculous stories about why people call 911. It’s really scary how some of these people live day to day
Some people are just stupid but there´s also a lot of people with untreated mental issues that do such things which is just sad.
No shit. AOC is proof.
Your comment reminded me of my first and only time to the US (it was NYC). The whole trip was normal and great, with the exception of some seemingly roided out black dude who came up to me whilst I was with my gf at a busy crossing, bragging about how he was like a superhero and how my gf would prefer me if I lifted. He gave the vibes of being single and frustrated, but most of all that he was high and/or crazy, which was kinda hilarious.
@@07negative56 lol @ AOC living in your head rent free.
@@PedroTRamos1 you mean the entirety of the democratic party? sad for americans
For anyone reading, if you accidentally call 911, DO NOT HANG UP. The responders will think something bad has happened and dispatch. STAY ON THE LINE, and then tell them that it was a mistake. You won't get in trouble for doing that.
i called as a child and hung up. they call back. after like the 3rd/4th time a cop showed up to scare me straight.🤣🍻
A guy in the uk called an ambulance because he legs turned blue. After they took him to the emergency room. It turned out he was wearing new jeans and the dye had leaked on to his legs. 😂😂
they had something similar in a House episode. kid was red because of the couch or smth
Thats retarded. No one put 2 and 2 together.
I heard of a guy who went to the dr because he had an erection that lasted longer than 4 hours, the dr did a bunch of blood work, then asked him if he took any pills for that or otherwise any other meds, dude said no. So the dr scheduled him for a mri immediately. When dude was getting ready to be put in the mri they said the usual, please remove all clothing with zippers buttons, rivits or anything metal at all on them, remove all jewelry and if you have a pacemaker or any rods, plates or staples surgically implanted let it be known immediately otherwise it will result in injury or possibly death. Dude says "oh shit, do i have to take off my cock ring now?" Case closed...
Or a head nurse i talked to in the obstetrics and gynecology dept who said every week she gets at least one female who comes in for an std/ infection check and had lost a tampon, figured it just fell out so she just puts another in and the nurse has to get out the pussy spreaders and dig that nasty, decomposing, rotten ass tampon and put it in 4 biohazard bags to try and stop the smell from stinking up the whole place for hours... said one older lady had 4 up in there and actually got a blood infection and later died from it.. said her fuckin insides were eaten away and almost fully closed from all the scab and exposed tissue trying to heal itself... said when she opened her legs the entire wing of the hospital had to be closed from the smell alone.. said all the staff were puking everywhere and other patients were n all.. fuck, that, job... in the butt...
@@Z-Ack bro they never looked at his penis? Usually they have you drop trow and examine a little...that seems like bs to me.
Dude, "are you here?" had me busting a gut. Not are you open. Are you HERE? How do you answer that.
You gotta say "No, just missed me" or something like that and let them take it away from there
Am I not?
"Last i checked"
Sounds like something Steven Wright would say.
Now I'm dying to find out where this store is, just so I can ask the same thing. That's hilarious!
The idea of California calling Hawaii warning about the incoming pearl harbour attack, like some pantomime sketch "they're behind you!"
That could be the plot to Tenet's sequel
It’s sad that I can say this is the SECOND person I’ve heard saying this.
Love the idea that people who take flights across the world are time traveling 😂
What I immediately thought was "well, most teens are idiots because they are teens, this one came by it honestly - through genetics." That was pretty funny, but I also felt bad for laughing.
@@loki_l_1380 When you travel in a vehicle you are time traveling. The past of time and space behind you , forward into future time and space.
I’m an emt as well and someone once called 911 because they’re baby was crying. Not hurt, just crying.
I did mold removal for 8months and once while bringing a client down to show where the mold was, she asked "Well how do you know its not a good mold?" 🤦
Growing penicillin on the wall sounds like a reasonable idea...
Oh man! Of all the dumb questions I've ever heard in my lifetime, the one about the time zones and the bombing of Pearl Harbor is just amazing.
I love how much popularity he has gained in recent years. I've been a big fan of his from the beginning and it's awesome to see him come into the spot light, as he has.
LMAO Bill said "these are all gonna be me" - at the Apple store...me too
Year-round ice rink, customer at the ticket counter in the entrance room: "It's a little cool in here, it is going to be like that inside?".
“If I were a dictator, those people would be eliminated.” -Bill Burr. I think this quote is appropriate here. 😂
“Are you here?”
The lady asking for 'blow', meaning pot, at a liquor store... that's just adorable. She was clearly risking humiliation, just to get some weed for a friend. I bet she's lovely.
Blow, where I come from is a reference to cocaine.
@@patsmightymovers3885 For sure. Maybe my comment wasn't clear enough- I was saying that if she called pot 'blow', she was obviously not a smoker so she must have been doing a favour for a friend. I think Bill actually said that.
probably not
Her friend(s) set her up. Pretty funny.
Like sending my wife into the store to ask them for blinker fluid.
@@mikem1006 I used to make blinker fluid jokes all the time. I didn't realize that my daughter didn't know I was joking, and as an adult, actually asked for it. When she told me, I could not stop laughing. It was so funny and so sad at the same time. It's still funny.
Who ever does these funny Bill photoshop jobs, you are hilarious and amazing!
I worked in a record store. This happened all the time.
Customer: I was driving in my car and heard this great song on the radio. What was it?
Me: Did you catch who it was by, the chorus, any of the lyrics, even a genre?
Customer: No. I have no way whatsoever of describing it.
Me: (screaming internally) We can try calling the station to ask. Which station and when did they play it?
Customer: I don't know what station, but it was just on.
Me: Can you go to your car and check what station it was?
Customer: No, I'm not doing that. You should know what song it was.
Me: Yes, clearly my mistake has been not keeping an up to the minute playlist of every radio station in this city, just on the off chance someone who doesn't know what radio station they listen to hears a song they like, but can't be bothered to see if the DJ names the song or the band once it's finished, or even picks up the hook line of the chorus. There are many reasons to quit this job, but chief among them is obviously my inability to do everything for adult babies who can't do a single thing to help themselves navigate a world so complicated that even the lyrics of nauseatingly repetitive radio songs defy comprehension.
What city was this in? That amazes me
This was an episode of Married With Children.
“That’s an easy one, sir: Darude - Sandstorm”
But it goes da da da do do do da... Which song is that?
@@matj3296 Oh, I know that one! It's The Police! ;-]
I worked at Home Depot for a year and got "do you work here?" by a customer once every 2 weeks while wearing a giant orange apron.
In defense of those idiots, I've been tempted to ask too (but kept my mouth shut).
A bunch of contractors/construction workers come in the store wearing their visibility vests. I usually try to find the scrawniest dude who obviously doesn't work construction just to be sure.
@TheBest HockeyMind Well then just ask your question or start with can you help me. Me with a orange apron on signals that I work here.
@TheBest HockeyMind We dont wear vest. We wear aprons. Clearly different.
@TheBest HockeyMind The Hello my name is _______ should be a big clue too.
@@SuperReviews4you That's true, but I guess some people get used to certain phrasing, or maybe they asked someone for help once that didn't actually work in the place? I've had the same question while stocking shelves, but then we do have outside vendors that do the same but don't work in the store. Still not as bad as asking for sneakers in an Apple store...
You forgot
“Do you have Jack Daniel’s?”
💀🤣
I love how it literally caught him off guard and mind fucked him, the statement about Pearl harbor. If I'm being honest, it kind of did the same thing to me. I yelled What the fuck simultaneously with him. The fact that any person could say think that is utterly horrifying
I paused it to say that and then comes the astronauts and Earth question . Jesus christ, the stupidity in that family is hereditary
lol ikr, I had to think about it for a minute, because it was that fucking stupid.
I don’t understand how one can be that stupid and out of touch with reality but still be able to formulate a proper question
They would’ve been able to warn Hawaii!😂
I worked at an auto parts store once and a gentleman comes in and asks for a part for a pontiac "Goolie". After very confused looks, my coworkers and I went out to the parking lot to see this pontiac "Goolie". The joy on our faces when we saw a burgundy pontiac 6000 LE. life's all about the little moments.
😆😆😆
0:39 the picture where bill carry those apple product, lol
Waiting for the day Billy Drumsticks does his own drumrolls. 😆
I used to manage a movie theater. A woman once came in asking for her free ticket to see some PG movie. I told her there were no free tickets, they cost $8.00.
Her response: “I thought I got a free ticket if I volunteered to be a kid’s parental guidance”.
The lady legitimately didn’t understand how movie ratings worked.
That is spectacular!
Yep that's filed under the category I like to call "Dangerously stupid." lol
"where is the nearest butcher?Did you know ?spread a lil liverworst in a few key areas the dog goes nuts,but we cant get the cat trained"-Random Customer and wife at my job..
I died at the dog food part
10:19 I gotta admit I was one of those stupid kids who didn't understand timezone and thought there was some magical time traveling going on
Hahahah the flat earth response was the best ever. Couldnt stop laughing lmfao
I used to work in a small restaurant in the South End of Boston. One day some LAY-DEE ordered a vanilla and grape nuts frozen yogurt. When I gave it to her she looked at it and asked what the topping was, grape nuts which is what she ordered I told her.
Her response: "Oh I thought it was gonna be artificial grape" verbatum
When bill says ..what the fuck .. after the 40 year old asks about choking I died . Hes so readable without video you just can see his face I love it .
Aint gonna lie Bill. This series is fucking good
"Hey we're 2 hours in the future! The Japanese are comin'
poor kid getting fed that nonsense lol
That astronaut one was ducking genius
How do you "understand" time zones and yet fail sooo hard when applying that knowledge?
Must be one of the top 3 dumbest question/statements of all time!!
Working in medical can confirm shit like that happens a lot. People ask why they coughed and what can we do to help them, even if they hadn't coughed since which was days ago.
"If we can really go to space, how come astronauts have never been to Earth?" I vote to kill off this level of stupidity
I work road service. Had a guy ask me to test his tire battery. Got written up for laughing. Boss thought it was funny too.
OMG i can't hardly wait. Bill says this is 🍎 store employees and he said these are all gonna be me 🤣🤣🤣me too, Bill, me too LMAO 🤣 😂 I love this category so much
Good ole Billy red sac
If your mother would just relax with the lipstick 💄
@@bw4500
pigGray’s Coach Turned Into a Pumpkin
heheheh...
Passenger asked flight attendant why they couldn’t see the state lines? 🤦🏻♂️
i love this segment. Much needed.
Buddy in the Army used to say, "who's going on the packy run?" Yeah, he was from Boston.
Yup you got it around here we call it "the packy"
@@JaySparky I live in Ontario (Canada), and have never heard that phrase. What's the origin? Our liquor stores are controlled by the provincial governments. In Ontario, it's the LCBO (Liquor Control Board of Ontario). My brother refers to it as "his favourite Mexican, El Ceebio".
lol I remember distinctly asking the maternity test question to myself as a kid, before answering myself after giving it 1 second of thought.
"A twelve of fuckin bud light kidd"
When I worked at a Verizon call center, a woman called in because her internet card wasn't working.
I asked her to turn it on to start troubleshooting. That was the reason why it wasn't working. It was off.
As someone from Great Britain, I'd like to apologise for not warning our American friends about 911, no excuse since we knew about it 5 hours earlier
are u here? that's gotta be the funniest question i ever heard in my life - just say no, this is a recording
My favorite is when a customer asks you where the store location is after you just said it in your greeting to them
what?
That one's not so strange. When you're about to enquire about something on the telephone you might have a lot on your mind, questions, keeping stuff in order. Not to mention anxiety, so they might not always immediately memorize the location based purely off of a greeting. Even more so with the older folks. I do see your point somewhat though, considering that usually when you look up a phone # these days you can see the location on a map etc via google and all that. But again, old folks lol God bless em
Bruh this is hilarious.
one dislike is the girl who wanted smoke 😂
I should send one in as a bartender. Holy fucking shit.
Love from Poland ❤️
Good to see another Pole in this parts
@@MjTaboret the same kkkjkkkjgghyyyyuyuhuyyuyyytyyyttyytguuiiiiiu as a tester for the invite but I think I can make it to the park and get back to you on that one and the other two are the same as the year to you and your family ytrgyyrtr et rrtrrrerrrdfhtu I love you return to ashleyhomestore.ca/products/skempton-dining-room-table-set-7cn on The ygrdttf window and saw it was on the phone 📱📱 to the park and📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱📱 tttt to the park you guys are doing well and that you are doing the right thing to do the📱📱📱 truthy the
I was a butcher in a supermarket. Thanksgiving time an older sounding woman called us and asked if the turkey she bought would fit in her oven. I told her I don't know, I've never seen your oven. Imagine looking at a turkey, looking at your oven, having doubts and calling the supermarket. I shit you not, when I told her to try putting the turkey in the oven to check, she told me "oh no I don't want to cook it until Thanksgiving" I actually had to tell an adult that the oven didn't have to be on to check if a turkey will fit in it.
Who else but Quagmire?!? lol did you offer to taste her stuffing?
Do you sell Scotch tape 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Asking if there is a discount for multiple purchases isn't that odd. Many stores offer those deals.
I thought blow was cocaine 🤣😂 90s movies always called it blow
It is, that’s why it’s funny
Telecom company and a client had sent a wrong address for Colorado when, in fact, the site address was in California. I'm in Colorado and got the dispatch, but figured it out and notified the client and customer.
I then call into dispatch/completion and this girl keeps asking me "yes, I understand that it wasn't your vicinity, but you still won't answer if you used any parts off your truck". Unbelievable.
Actually, now that you mention it, that is a good point about the paternal test (the very last question on this video). The assumption when asking that question is that it would be obvious while the woman is carrying the baby during pregnancy is that she is the mother. But what about a 5 year old girl standing next to an adult woman on the street. How can one prove the woman is indeed the biological mother?
I don’t think it is unreasonable to ask if there is a discount for buying multiple devices at the apple store…
flat earth girl made my night
At 3 am in the morning, go to a convenience store and look around until the guy asks what the fuck you’re looking for. Tell him vacuum cleaner bags.
Loving this new format lol
Mr Bargain Bin Billy, where we can send some more of these?
Forever thankful for the laughs
In England we have a supermarket store called poundland, basically everything their is a pound. As a young teen me and a friends used to pick something up and ask how much it is for giggles
"there are no such thing as stupid questions, only stupid answers" Whoever said this never worked in retail or hospitality.
i like how bill burr reads, it's like a 5 grader that did not prepared his homework, and now is in front of the class reading for the first time immanuel kant. has no idea what he reads but he is failing at making it sound fluent. like throwing bricks in a washing machine.
Your comment reads as if it was written by a first-grader.
To be fair maternity tests do exist, they're just really rare. Imagine a surrogate mother who had another woman's baby via IVF claiming that it's actually hers for example. Or for adoptions and babies that got switched at birth. Very limited use case but it does happen
Dillweed was an insult I learned as a child in Youngstown Ohio
Same in western Maryland.
They've said that on that 70's show a lot of times and its set in Wisconsin
Love the new stuff on bill’s podcast
Those iPhone store question are mostly only dumb to iPhone store employees. I’m very tech savvy and always have been, but those questions weren’t even really dumb. They just work in the store and know everything about all their crap, and expect others to too. If someone’s never owned an iPhone, and buys one, HOW would they know the thing on the side turns the ringer on and off. Unless they read the entire direction booklet. Which no one does. But with the thousands of other things to learn on that phone if ur new to it, how would they know that is what I’m asking? Or anything about the phone really. Sorry, those questions weren’t dumb at all.
Hey Bill I love your podcasts alot. I love on these videos how you are morphing into each kind of employee
I thought I had heard the dumbest thing I have ever heard, but then hippydippyflatearthgirl just kept raising the bar.
If the question relates to physical location of an item, the customer could be Visually impaired and not see it.
I'm guessing the choking guy had something like barrets esophagus.
I work at a boutique liquor store too in los Angeles CA but we carry everything down to the crap beer and tons of wine and high end rare liquor. I can attest to all the dumbass shit people ask for. One time I had a person ask me if we sell weed and said "hey y'all should sell weed too, you will make a killing" I laughed and said sorry bro that's illegal. Another time I literally had a guy so drunk he was making out the one of the beer doors full on tongue and all late at night. I refused service and kicked him out. I went to follow him out and this dude walked across the street and got into a van and tried to drive away. He went about 10 feet and stopped. Luckily a cop pull up to the stop sign adjacent to the store. So I waved them down and said to them what happened and the arrested the dude for a DUI. If he was able to drive away he probably would've killed himself or God forbid someone else.
I worked overnight at tim hortons for 1.5 years and got asked " do you sell ice cream, and hamburgers" damn dude. Why?
My dumbass was imagining a grocery store that only sells apples
Timezones = timetravel!!!!
This weeks loto is mine.......awesome.
Worked at a stereo store many years ago. A guy comes in & asks if we had a particular cartridge for his turntable. Yes,. How much? $75. Jesus! I can get the same one down the street for $50. So go get it there. They're out of stock. Well if I was out of stock, I'd sell it to you for $40. Really?!
lol it's funny I just had a situation play out like that at a Hotel where I work. It's a Friday night and this guy is like "So and so is selling em for like this much $$ etc etc." I'm just like "Okay, that's a pretty good deal for a weekend, you should go take that one then." haha I know it's just a negotiating tactic but I've been doing it so long I just cut straight to the point now lol
#1 dumb thing apple store employees say WE SELL A GOOD PRODUCT AT A FAIR PRICE.
Anton reference, nice
I worked in a Joe's Crab Shack in Tulsa Oklahoma I had a person asked me hey if I order the oysters on a half shell are they going to turn my mouth black. Last time I came in here I ate them and my mouth turn to mud. My question is why on God's Earth would you go to a place again
Apple store #4 wasn't that bad. Worth a shot.
Come on down to "BILL'S BOTTLES!"
I work at a golf course and we get some of the DUMBEST questions in the pro shop...
Took a friend to a huge Dollar Tree. She had never been to one before and was really into seeing the things there. Time after time she kept picking up a product and saying excitedly "How much is this?" "A dollar Judy, it's the dollar store."
12 of fuckin bud light kid haha sounds like my brother and nephew
As the planet rotates east to west California would not be aware of A attack on pearl harbor until someone called from Hawaii to inform them. 2 hours ahead.
Where do you send questions????!!!! I have a 5 dumb questions being an Amazon delivery driver
Good ole Billy Bright Balls
Sex during a hurricane for unsafe sex got me pretty good.
Hippie Dippie Girl...
11:44 - I always asked friends who have a kid on the way "Are you sure you know who the mother is?" - for someone to ask this seriously though? WOW!
"nobody can be that dumb..." Have you not been paying attention to the news, Bill?
Sex during a hurricane, that's funny, actually made me laugh.
As someone who works with cell phones this is true lol
Bruh i thought i saw riley reid in the intro, was sad when it was not.