Can You Become ADDICTED to Grief?
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- Опубликовано: 13 сен 2024
- Here are 10 signs that you might be addicted to grief. I also talk about ways that you can get yourself out of the grief rut.
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MEDICAL DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor, counselor, or any other medical professional. Information in this video is not meant to be interpreted as medical advice. I am simply sharing my own experiences in my grief journey. If you feel that your needs are beyond the scope of the informational content of this video, please seek medical advice from your doctor to discuss treatments or medications that may be available to you. If you are having feelings or thoughts of self-harm or suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 800-273-8255
Helping you find your happy in the grieving process
Life, Love, and Laughter after Loss
Have you ever felt like you are addicted to grief?
Thanks for helping everyone who is grieving.
I am only 2 months in and don't want to be stuck, but I feel like I am.
Everything I see remains me of my husband.
So sad.. it's been 2 months.
I go home to an empty house with memories of us.
My daughter is grown with 3 children.
She moved away to live her life.
Grieving is the hardest thing ever after married to my husband for 30 years.
I joined grief share and a church.
I like it.
Hopefully I will meet friends.
My husband passed away and I miss him so much. Married for 30 years my best friend.
He started to lose control of paying bills. Still I didn't see.
I miss him!
I will make it through, and always love him.❤
Life move on...
Thanks for helping us who are grieving!❤
Thanks for watching #widfam
It was more than not paying the bills.
He died last stage dementia, and I didn't know because of the type of dementia he had.
He was a beautiful man, and I miss him so much.
I just lost my husband 19 days ago to a terminal illness. I feel traumatized with his home hospice care, watching him fade away little every day was brutal. I started one on one counseling right after he died which is helping. I am still waiting for the hospice to send information about the grief counseling they offer for one year. I am fortunate I have a supportive family and large group of friends, and several have become widowed this past year. I am so glad your podcast just happened to be available on my RUclips selections, I have no idea how this came about that suddenly I have numerous podcasts on becoming a widow. However; thankful for them. Yours is one of the best. I would like to join your group of widows/widowers for grief counseling if offered. Thank you for sharing your journey through widowhood with us, you are helping numerous fragile people process their grief to come out the other end a whole person again.
I am so sorry.
We found our hospice experience was horrific... I hope yours was better. My husband has been gone 10 mos and therapy helps a lot. He was sick for a couple of years and I cared for him ( hospice actually did not help much at all).
This podcast is really instrumental in my personal growth.
Wishing you well.
Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. Our hospice experience was as good as can be expected, except I wish they wouldn’t have tried so hard to keep me appeasing his mother. But they didn’t know how she was, so I guess I can’t blame them n
I lost my husband 39 days ago and went to my first Grief Share Class today… I think it is going to help me. God helps me. You help me. I hate feeling that there is this impenetrable barrier between my husband and I now. If I could have even just 5 more minutes…. It’s all so final…, until I pass also. I know there is heaven. My grief seems to be inconvenient to some wishing I would ‘get over it’ and ‘be like I used to be’. That will never happen, everything is different now, everything.
If people are already waiting for you to be “over it” just over a month into this journey, they obviously have no idea what our journey is like. I’m so sorry they are being like that!
It's been 1 1/2 years for me. I have gone on trips and everything. I spend time with the Lord. But, I still miss him everyday. My head says move on but my heart hasn't.
I understand the feeling for being torn. It’s a constant struggle, and we just have to conquer each day.
I do not agree - There is no time limit on grief or an acceptable "timeline" - I post a lot about how much I miss my late husband, and I always will, but at the same time I am still moving forward, still working full time, I've started new hobbies and activities and I've stepped out in faith to manage a group of singles at our church. I will always miss my husband and writing about how much I miss him is cathartic for me.
Always missing your spouse is not “stuck”. We always will miss them. You don’t sound like your stuck or addicted. You sound healthy.
I would say that is still moving forward. And I’m not an expert, just speaking about my perceptions of how so many of my fellow widfam members have shared their experiences as well. If you are comfortable with your journey and don’t think you need help or more resources, then this video is probably not helpful for you. Thanks for your feedback!
For me, I don't want to grieve forever. My husband passed 2 months ago, and I hate what I am going through, the guilt, and sadness.
I loved my husband, and at one point, I must carry on, he would have wanted me to, he was so positive.
Meeting news friends, new employment, new life that blossoms into a beautiful person ❤️!
Everyone’s grief journey is different. It also depends on the relationship you had with your spouse and how long you’ve been married. I’ve been married for 46 years, and I’m sure I will be grieving longer than 2 years.
I imagine we will grieve our whole lives, but the progression of our healing in this journey can be different for each of us. Thanks for your feedback.
Yes to almost everything in the video
No joy, isolating and not moving forward
Been over 2 1/2 years
Stopped posting to social media
I need to get back to journaling as it did show improvement from beginning to year one
Thanks Leo for explaining things so accurately
Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. If you aren’t already in our FB group, feel free to join for more support: facebook.com/groups/onehappywidow
I recently got diagnosed with Complex PTSD. Grief is heightened with CPTSD. The attachment issues I have with my husband because he was the only person who ever really loved me in a God honoring manner has triggered prolonged grief. I'm seeing a counselor and getting help. I find my hope in Jesus returning at any moment. My Husband was my closest brother in Christ, my prayer buddy, study partner and I miss him. The world is terrible.
You are on our prayer list now as well.
I’d say yes and haven’t heard a word yet! 😢
Thanks for watching #widfam
Not as bad as I actually expected… but, so much loss and trauma in a short time… and, I have 3 babies in Heaven and no living children. I also lost my Maggie and Lil Man and Michael in 18 months and totaled 3 vehicles in 13 months. I’ve lost 100 pounds and trauma and PTSD since childhood and I’m retired military. I can’t seem to make decisions… I live with a new puppy in a big house I don’t even want (the house)… I figure I’m stuck to a certain point. I do socialize, decorative painting with friends but, used to teach and cruise but, seems to make me sad now because Michael enjoyed watching me paint and we always cruised together. I have one this coming weekend. I’m definitely trying… thank you for your insights and inspiration… trauma since childhood doesn’t help and not much family left… but, I’m trying to find my independence again. Gosh, I was so independent… I feel like I lost so much independence being retired doesn’t help. We’d moved to Florida and now, I’m here alone with some great friends but, don’t know what I want to actually do with the rest of my life. I don’t want to be irresponsible or irrational… I’m in a few groups that have been helpful, just my stinking thinking! ❤️
I’m glad you are staying busy. It’s different when we are young band independent by choice, than getting older and having to be independent because of life circumstances. I can do many things on my own, but I generally don’t want to. Creative outlets like painting always help.
@@OneHappyWidow Thanks Leo. You’re much younger than me o, have been such sunshine and inspiration. Thank you. 💚😂😂
💚💚💚 Sorry about those goofy laughs.
A whopper of a question for a former long term caregiver and introvert to start with. Working on myself and projects moving forward.
I am an introvert by nature as well, so my job as a middle school teacher really drains me each day!
Thank you Leo for this video. In the last three years I lost my husband, my dad and my mom is on poor health. Unfortunately I fit most of those bullet points. I’m still in therapy working through it all but it’s been slow.
Thanks for watching and sharing your feedback. I’m glad you are in therapy.
I think sometimes (and this doesn’t apply to all who are stuck) being stuck gets you the attention and support you got in the early days especially if you are one who bleeds your heart on social media. The attention is like a drug, but the reality is friends get weary of it after a while. When people either gently or bluntly say you might need help then it opens you up to feelings of hurt and bitterness. That can get really ugly and dark. It costs you relationships. It kind of goes along with sense of identity. I know people like this and while I do make occasional posts about my dead husband and talk about him with trusted friends I knew early on in my grief I didn’t want to get stuck and alienate people. I had made that choice when my first husband betrayed and divorced me. I vowed I wouldn’t let that devastate or change me in a bad way (although it did change me but with tons of counseling I came out a stronger and better person). I applied a lot of those coping skills to my grief over the death of my wonderful second husband. I’m in my third year and while there are still hard days my grief is more like the big oak tree 🌳 in the background.
Thank you for this insight! You have described that social media part of it better than I could, so you obviously understand what I’m trying to say. It’s really hard to tell people in that situation, because they tend to get defensive and feel they are in the right because, after all, their husband did die. And if the person suggesting it isn’t widowed, then the defensive attitude is even stronger. But if it comes from a fellow widow, then it’s more of “I would expect a fellow widow to understand better”, so I think sometimes there are people who are so stuck, they don’t want to be helped. Thanks for watching, and adding more clarity to the topic.
How about EMDR therapy or any of the other energy therapies?They work really well.They take care of trauma & they don't require big pharma
Love this suggestion, thanks for adding!
Thanks Leo. ♥️
Thanks for watching
Leo forgive me but you reached out for someone to share you life with early on. Its been 13 mos. Wee bit better but would feel guilt if another
Man asked me out for a meal ...coffee good conversation. My son would probably hit the ceiling!
I understand- we all grieve, heal, and move forward at our own pace. I remarried 2 years out. My current husband is also widowed, and when we married, he was only 7 months out. But it is working for us, and it might not be for someone else. My whole point of this video is to encourage those who aren’t progressing at all, to reach out for support.
I’m at just past 3 years.
How is your journey going at this point?
My wife passed away one month ago and I am shattered in a million pieces I want to join her soon.
I need help need coaching hope you get one starting in September
I’m getting it together. I’ll post a video about it when it’s ready!