Female Orgasm - How to Know If You've Had An Orgasm

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  • Опубликовано: 10 июн 2024
  • Orgasms can be really subtle, especially at the beginning of your orgasm journey, so how do you know if you've had one?
    Today we're sharing how to know if you've had an orgasm and real stories from real women!
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    Hi! We’re Vanessa and Xander! We specialize in helping people stop feel so embarrassed about sex, and start having way more fun in the bedroom. We’ve been affectionately nicknamed “that sex couple” by our followers for our frank discussions of the modern challenges faced by modern couples.
    Vanessa is a licensed psychotherapist. She studied human sexuality at Brown University, has written for The New York Times, Allure, and Lifehacker, and has been featured thousands of times by publications like O, The Oprah Magazine, Real Simple, Refinery29, New York Magazine, Rolling Stone, Buzzfeed, and many more. And Xander is a regular dude who left a cushy career in Tech once he realized it was more fun to talk about sex with his wife all day.
    Together, we have the unique ability to make you laugh while giving you the courage to talk about sex and relationships in ways you never have before!
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    #femaleorgasm #orgasm #haveanorgasm #pleasure #femalepleasure #pleasureinthebedroom #inthebedroom #marriage #relationships #therapy #sextherapy #sex #morning #intimacy #sexlife #talkaboutsex #communication #expectationsvsreality #ltr #relationshiphealth #sexualhealth #talk #sexandrelationships #sexpectations #romantic #romance #sexhacks #sexandintimacy #relationshiphacks #communicationhacks

Комментарии • 124

  • @kaylajohnson5701
    @kaylajohnson5701 2 года назад +456

    I literally started this video thinking “if one more person says ‘you’ll know’ I’m gonna scream.” Thank you for going into detail - many don’t!

    • @vanessaandxander
      @vanessaandxander  2 года назад +15

      You're welcome Kayla! Thanks for watching!

    • @pakto9570
      @pakto9570 3 месяца назад

      😊q​@@vanessaandxander

    • @JasmineBuckley-fj7ny
      @JasmineBuckley-fj7ny Месяц назад +2

      Right??? I had a lot of problems of not knowing if I reached it at all when I first started with toys. Just when I discovered Sila I understood what what going on and learned more about my body. Stay positive! ❤

    • @leahl2321
      @leahl2321 21 день назад

      IKR, ITS SO ANNOYING

  • @lindsay8575
    @lindsay8575 Месяц назад +30

    I was sooo hung up on not knowing if I did or didn’t have an orgasm that it was actual blocking my brain from just relaxing

  • @LaRa-fi6cb
    @LaRa-fi6cb Год назад +50

    You guys are really professional and loved the way you’re presenting ❤

  • @tanushreehira780
    @tanushreehira780 Год назад +18

    Thank you so much for this informative video ❤️

  • @nacarreira777
    @nacarreira777 Год назад +106

    I have always felt like the guys I slept with were having a lot more fun than I ever did. Haven't experienced any of these but thanks for the upload.

    • @Sofia-lw4fl
      @Sofia-lw4fl 20 дней назад

      try toys

    • @nacarreira777
      @nacarreira777 19 дней назад +3

      @@Sofia-lw4fl It's not that important. I prefer gardening.

  • @lyricbada9557
    @lyricbada9557 11 месяцев назад +7

    This is such great content. Thanks so much for sharing❤

  • @missmacy4527
    @missmacy4527 13 дней назад +2

    The difference in intensity is so real. Also the difference between your SO and a random person, a person and a toy and a luxurious toy like the Enigma and a cheap one you get for 17$. Everything plays a role and everything's different.

  • @hutbookclub
    @hutbookclub 7 месяцев назад +3

    Very insightful and and and all that

  • @pringlesup7672
    @pringlesup7672 2 года назад +68

    It feels good to know the last person I had sex with was experiencing majority of these descriptions ☺️

  • @Its_Just_Lonely_Me
    @Its_Just_Lonely_Me Месяц назад +8

    Wow, I had really been wondering. I had a sensation a couple times, but didn't know if it was an orgasm or if I was overexaggerating the truth. Thanks for letting me know.

  • @cfour7672
    @cfour7672 Год назад +18

    Sometimes it's a small but it makes my headache go away. So light n nice

  • @ntombizodwavundla168
    @ntombizodwavundla168 Год назад +30

    The wave and the sneeze are true for me.

  • @m1lkybra1n
    @m1lkybra1n Год назад +105

    I get the body spasms, it feels like waves of pressure. It feels like my genitals feel like a warm but cold sensation. But it feel like it's not enough after the pleasure goes. It feels good but it feels like it's not enough. Like I want more so I over use it until my genitals are sensitive but even then it's not enough. It feels very anti climatic. And this is been happening for YEARS.

    • @vanessaandxander
      @vanessaandxander  Год назад +9

      We'd recommend you check out our Masturbation Masturclass, designed to help you feel more confident in and out of the bedroom, get the most out of a solo experience, and get to know your body better! Check it out at shop.vmtherapy.com/masturbation-masturclass/

    • @asthaupadhyaya8298
      @asthaupadhyaya8298 Год назад +17

      I CAN LEGIT RELATE LIKE CRAZY

    • @kobeibryant4356
      @kobeibryant4356 Год назад +12

      I been waiting for this type comment couldn’t find it. I experienced a woman who 5 minutes straight entire body was shaking in spasms while squirting the SHII was unreal to where I didn’t know what was going on all I could do was watch. Meanwhile once she was done I tried to touch her and it was oh no “I’m done” and she just layed there wouldn’t move nothing definitely definition of nothing left

    • @AedanBlackheart
      @AedanBlackheart Год назад

      ​@Kobei Bryant then you did a great job and now she's gotta make you do that lol

    • @GooglePlusPages
      @GooglePlusPages Месяц назад

      Your Gentiles? I hope you give equal time to the Jews…

  • @blairsterling6141
    @blairsterling6141 Год назад +30

    Orgasm intensity varies. Usually they are more fulfilling and intense if a person really feels love ❤ for their partner(s). The love in mind and soul, intensifies the brain / genital connection. Yet, I remember one time with a casual girlfriend and the orgasm felt like my whole body exploded into millions of delicate pieces !!! My mind and body felt like a nuclear explosion !!!!

  • @jesss1510
    @jesss1510 2 года назад +8

    Ok so yes I had one know I know thank you 😄

  • @cfour7672
    @cfour7672 Год назад +3

    Stars!!!
    Or on top of a mountain
    Bliss

  • @vanessalittle-sellers7981
    @vanessalittle-sellers7981 11 месяцев назад +6

    There is no question in my mind!! MMMMMMM🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

  • @darijaandrejeva7202
    @darijaandrejeva7202 2 года назад +13

    Hello, thank you so much for such great content that is so scarce on youtube!!! I want to ask one question, if there were some of the signs but there were no pleasant sensations themselves, only that it should stop or loss of sensitivity as if I was about to finish, but at that moment sensitivity is lost, what is it?

  • @lindsay8575
    @lindsay8575 Месяц назад +5

    Our body’s are so amazing

  • @michellemetcalfe3161
    @michellemetcalfe3161 2 года назад +2

    Yes

  • @katrinam6795
    @katrinam6795 2 года назад +42

    The sudden not wanting any more stimulation is an orgasm? Not to be critical, bit are you sure? It feels like my brain simply shutting down any action.

    • @NatashaW1
      @NatashaW1 2 года назад +32

      Yeah same here. I always thought I just needed to go on longer but it hurts? But it doesn't hurt? It's a weird feeling and I feel like I can no longer go on any longer

    • @shutit4024
      @shutit4024 Год назад +8

      @@NatashaW1 same here I just gotta wait like 5-10 minutes than go again

  • @cfour7672
    @cfour7672 Год назад

    Interesting

  • @cathydutton362
    @cathydutton362 2 года назад +28

    It feels like I’m in another world

  • @izzyishere111
    @izzyishere111 8 месяцев назад +16

    So to describe how a small one might feel…
    It starts with my legs they get cloudy and fuzzy feeling the I get a little hot in my head. My head also feels cloudy. Some of my muscles throughout my body something slightly twitch, but nothing to crazy.
    This is a what it feels for me

  • @melinabatista9776
    @melinabatista9776 Год назад +32

    I still don’t know 😭😭😭

  • @sannehol6942
    @sannehol6942 2 года назад +5

    Thank you so much!

    • @vanessaandxander
      @vanessaandxander  2 года назад +1

      Of course Sanne! Glad you found this helpful! Be sure to check out our IG (instagram.com/vanessamarintherapy), where we have something exciting coming on this topic this week!

    • @sannehol6942
      @sannehol6942 2 года назад

      @@vanessaandxander I will check it out thank you so much ;)

    • @jamestrentham8576
      @jamestrentham8576 3 месяца назад

      Hi, how are you now, any progress? Don't feel any pressure if you're sexually active. Take you're time

  • @leonsmith5258
    @leonsmith5258 5 месяцев назад +7

    Biggest thing is feeling extremely euphoric like how people describe ecstasy/MDMA

  • @nicolepeterson401
    @nicolepeterson401 Год назад +28

    I have a question! Is it possible to get one while working out? I was doing some push-ups and I felt a weird sensation similar to what you described and it freaked me out because it seemed to come out of nowhere. Thank you for this informational video btw!

    • @cfour7672
      @cfour7672 Год назад +10

      Yes. Cause blood is pumping down there. Endorphins too

    • @flutenanyidk1806
      @flutenanyidk1806 3 месяца назад +2

      As a matter a fact yes it is

  • @mariahfolkard929
    @mariahfolkard929 Месяц назад +5

    It feels so good that how do i explain 😂 but at the moment you don't want to stop and after that you want to stop 😅❤

  • @Jack_sparrow-am-different
    @Jack_sparrow-am-different 11 месяцев назад

    What is that question

  • @Jerusalxm
    @Jerusalxm 10 месяцев назад +6

    It’s like finding that itchy spot

  • @amidave9888
    @amidave9888 Год назад +11

    Omg .. except goosebumps I have experienced all the other kinds of orgasms .. I also had brain freeze few times afterwards 😅..

  • @sarahjoponziolifeteamprinc6060
    @sarahjoponziolifeteamprinc6060 8 месяцев назад +1

    I have! 😂😊 my head back far !

  • @ness-lee-crunch
    @ness-lee-crunch Месяц назад

    Idk I’ve never not known. I think we’re calling lots of things that are arousal and sexual reaction “orgasm.” They certainly can be varying intensities but I don’t think you’d be confused.

  • @savvyxdd
    @savvyxdd 5 месяцев назад +2

    i have a question. is there anyway to have a one on one. my husband keeps insisting that an orgasum is something different and it has been coasing issues in our relationship. he wants me to orgasim . but i think i do on a regular basis now it’s just not what he wants it to be.

    • @vanessaandxander
      @vanessaandxander  5 месяцев назад +1

      While we no longer do 1:1 counseling, we definitely think this a great situation to engage a sex therapist's help! -Team V&X

    • @jamestrentham8576
      @jamestrentham8576 3 месяца назад

      Was there any issue before, or do you feel you're doubting yourself?

    • @desireeperham7093
      @desireeperham7093 Месяц назад

      Erm... he's telling you how you should be orgasming? Wow.

    • @xdxdxdxd4575
      @xdxdxdxd4575 Месяц назад

      You're husband has no idea of how females work, he need to learn about it immediatly, coz that thing can lead to not getting you any orgasm, later on, and you end up just faking it with the "simptoms" he wish for.

  • @yvonnegaywood5487
    @yvonnegaywood5487 Год назад +7

    I sure know when I am having an organism it so sweet I wine so hard and then I laugh

  • @thelovelyunicorns
    @thelovelyunicorns Год назад +15

    Idk how I got here but as a female, this comment section makes me so sad :(

  • @zsizzles4002
    @zsizzles4002 8 месяцев назад

    I can't tell for myself. Sometimes i feel a number of those signs mentioned especially the clit pulsation, the breathing, the interest change, the flush and so on and it has happened when I'm by myself reading or thinking about those stimulating things. I can remain perfectly quiet during those moments, like no sounds of pleasure and it also doesn't feel like there's a whole lot that comes out? Idek how much counts as a small orgasm and if what i have is less than that. I also feel dizzy afterwards and my ears get blocked out, so does my vision temporarily but idk what to make of it. So yeah I'm super confused and I'd appreciate if someone can help me understand wtf this all means for me😭

    • @meagain2222
      @meagain2222 Месяц назад +1

      your body looks like your blood pressure may have dropped.Have someone measure that for you at the time.

    • @samia6888
      @samia6888 13 дней назад

      @@meagain2222yeah the last part sounds exactly like that when my blood pressure drops.

  • @muskaanrathore511
    @muskaanrathore511 21 день назад +1

    Should all the signs happen together or even one of them is considered that you had an orgasm?

    • @vanessaandxander
      @vanessaandxander  20 дней назад

      It could be. If you have more questions, please feel free to email us at info @ vmtherapy.com so we can see if we have some resources that would interest you. - Jackie with TeamV&X

  • @smallbusinessmarketerfreel4885
    @smallbusinessmarketerfreel4885 11 месяцев назад +20

    Legs shaking and gush of wetness is reported by my partner. But my vagina is not contracting... nor do i have pulsation... i feel like peeing 😢 EXTRA LUBRICATION... YES... THOUGH...OMG😮i intentionally go pee now in advance. But i still dont know 😕

    • @nolwazikhumalo5655
      @nolwazikhumalo5655 11 месяцев назад

      Sounds like you're about to squirt, not pee

    • @MariaL42709
      @MariaL42709 6 месяцев назад +1

      that’s me

    • @elinanilsson6476
      @elinanilsson6476 Месяц назад +1

      Same

    • @teresapeevey970
      @teresapeevey970 16 дней назад

      Same here.

    • @sarahlawson1695
      @sarahlawson1695 8 дней назад

      Yeah for me I feel like I pissed myself and like I almost have to contract my muscles to get it to release. Idk either man

  • @comments3179
    @comments3179 Месяц назад +4

    Feels like climbing a mountain and escalating until you reach the top and then there is a massive, satisfying explosion of pleasure.

  • @user-lx5bj5gn3l
    @user-lx5bj5gn3l Месяц назад +2

    I've never had that during sex

  • @Little_piggie_on_ice
    @Little_piggie_on_ice 28 дней назад +2

    It’s hard for me to tell if I’m about to have one, having one, or just had one lmao. They should show this in sec ed at school they didn’t teach us shit.

    • @vanessaandxander
      @vanessaandxander  28 дней назад +1

      If you REALLY want to learn how, email us at info@vmtherapy.com and I will get you some resources! - Team V&X

  • @amydecker6207
    @amydecker6207 Месяц назад +3

    What??? I KNOW whem i have had one. How can you not know?

    • @ktxtenskz7441
      @ktxtenskz7441 Месяц назад +3

      Cos some of us physically can’t do it lol

  • @DaniEllah-fb2ns
    @DaniEllah-fb2ns Год назад +11

    Most times I feel like electric shocks in my legs during sex ...is it normal

    • @MariaL42709
      @MariaL42709 6 месяцев назад +2

      happens to me so ig 🤷‍♀️

  • @konstantinapapaioannou4306
    @konstantinapapaioannou4306 Год назад +18

    Oh honey, you'll know.

  • @emilymeyer7788
    @emilymeyer7788 14 дней назад

    "You will know" is true though. There is nothing similar to an orgasm. If you are questioning yourself whether you had one, you didn't. It is true that orgasms vary in intensity and sort, but they are always recognizable, I don't know how one could possibly not know they had one

  • @brandonsettgast5177
    @brandonsettgast5177 6 месяцев назад +5

    If you have to ask, then no😅

  • @chocolatebrain6002
    @chocolatebrain6002 Месяц назад +2

    Brain fog and lethargy.

  • @andrewward7042
    @andrewward7042 Год назад +5

    Vanessa is so hot!

  • @johnshujon420
    @johnshujon420 Год назад +27

    Women orgasm are way strong full body experiences & they can enjoy it infinite times ! Women are very lucky

    • @cfour7672
      @cfour7672 Год назад

      Agreed

    • @xdxdxdxd4575
      @xdxdxdxd4575 Месяц назад +7

      No, we are not. A lot of women never ever experience that feeling. Some of them sometimes, and just very few had it. I didnt count that, but I had just under 10 times in my life during sex.
      And I don't know about other woman, but for me clitolyc and G spot orgasm is not the same. Clitolyc is kinda centers just at the female parts of the body and stays there (I think that is more likely as a male orgasm), while G spot orgasm goes to the full body, and explodes, plus it can be longer. If you make come a woman at G spot she wold experiece not just one moment but she can be high till you doing her (at least tgat is my experience).
      More woman experience clitolyc than G spot, and lot of them never ever experience G spot (that is why it is more important to go to clyt and not focus on penetration). I am 42, and had just three G spot orgasms through penis in in my whole life.

    • @ktxtenskz7441
      @ktxtenskz7441 Месяц назад +4

      Some women aren’t so lucky lol. Some of us physically cannot have one.