3 Tips to Figure Out if You're Nonbinary |

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  • Опубликовано: 28 дек 2024

Комментарии • 4,8 тыс.

  • @lazer-exe9178
    @lazer-exe9178 4 года назад +6500

    the hardest part for me is figuring out if im non-binary, or if im just not comfortable with traditional femininity and gender roles

    • @lucianriddle3443
      @lucianriddle3443 4 года назад +843

      I have this problem too, I do prefer they/them pronouns tho, they feel less restrictive but in regards to gender idk if im a woman or nonbinary ughhhhh
      (update) I discovered I'm actually a trans man

    • @avim3120
      @avim3120 4 года назад +417

      Hi! I was in the same boat. For most of my conscious life. I’m in my 40’s and just finally accepted last year I’m non-conforming/ non-binary.
      I have a hard time fitting into societal expectations of women.
      I’m married to a man & have two kids. But I’m not motherly in the traditional sense. I’m much more the garage/shop rat that would rather wear jeans or sweats than a pretty outfit most times. Then sometimes I like to dress “fem” and wear makeup. It changes like the weather.
      Only recently have I become totally comfortable with my androgynous look. But I’m really happy.
      When I finally expressed to my husband I’m non-binary I was relieved to have his full support. He knows absolutely nothing has changed. I’m still the same person he married. I’m still his “wife” (this term does not bother me). For me, pronouns are not real important. I’m comfortable enough with she/her that I don’t want to change that.
      It was hard to finally work it though my head though. Def was a struggle.
      My kids love that I’m into so many things outside of what I was taught were “my place”. We teach them to challenge the status quo and never let anyone define them, except them.
      I can braid their hair, sew their clothes, fix the frigging car, and look bad ass the whole time. Screw the lipstick. Lol
      Editing this to add- to A.M. (whoever you are) and anyone else who uses solely what I wrote above to determine if I “belong” in the non-binary category, just don’t. There is so much to me and what makes me who I am that I couldn’t write it all here. And I won’t. I was only showing support for the person I replied to and I am disgusted that someone even came at me like that. I’m not explaining anything to random trolls.

    • @lucianriddle3443
      @lucianriddle3443 4 года назад +119

      @@avim3120 omg thank you so much for this! i'm happy to see that you are able to be yourself and have a supportive partner too. you really comforted me in my confusion. i'll do some soul searching without giving myself time limits. again thank you so much i really enjoyed reading your comment. your kids will definitely grow up to be great people with a parent like you :)

    • @avim3120
      @avim3120 4 года назад +36

      @A. M. mmkay baby cakes I don’t need to defend who I am to you or anyone. I was only here to show support for the comment I replied to. You do not get to gatekeep on people.
      I know who and what I am. And if you think you know so much about about me from ONE comment on ONE RUclips video and want to be mad about it, die mad about it. I don’t have time for people like you that want to delegitimize people. I worked too damned hard to accept my self for who and what I am to let some rando internet troll to roll in and try to knock me down. Move on.
      Editing for this point-
      Btw- did you miss the part where non-binary people are not specifically any gender or one gender regardless of whether they were assigned it at birth or not?
      Did you miss the part where I accepted I’m non-binary?
      I’m not a woman setting myself apart from other women. I was assigned female at birth but do not identify as specifically female. So you point (or, rather troll) makes no sense.

    • @kytiladdy
      @kytiladdy 4 года назад +54

      Im a girl n i think that gender is a construction so fcuk it all n be yourself n do whatever u wanna do yay no need for labels

  • @reallytired27
    @reallytired27 4 года назад +3713

    to everyone who’s confused about their sexuality or gender identity don’t forget that it’s okay to be confused and it’s perfectly okay to experiment. stay strong! stay safe!

    • @MiChAel-st6pg
      @MiChAel-st6pg 4 года назад +7

      💕💫💙

    • @jofrenchfry3992
      @jofrenchfry3992 4 года назад +6

      Thanks

    • @sandyg4646
      @sandyg4646 4 года назад +9

      Ok to be confused? Young teenagers are already confused about so many things and you want to add MORE confusion to the mix?

    • @teriyaki_wings
      @teriyaki_wings 4 года назад +60

      Sandy Gonsalves of course it’s okay to be confused! Identifying and working through that confusion is simply how we learn more about ourselves. Stop acting like it’s some horrible thing to be confused, or not know, or not understand something about yourself. It’s just part of being human.

    • @sandyg4646
      @sandyg4646 4 года назад +3

      @@teriyaki_wings I'm not saying it's horrible to be confused, it's not. But I don't think the purpose is to cause MORE confusion, something that I think the non binary community has unintentionally have done.

  • @Nicoratboy
    @Nicoratboy 4 года назад +7608

    “ I love when people can’t tell if I’m a boy or girl “ can relate

    • @sisi7304
      @sisi7304 4 года назад +179

      same here!! I definitely go for a more androgynous or masculine style, so when people see me and don't know or assume boy, I get so happy and feel so validated, even if I can't always say so (public areas or when my unsupportive family is around) and especially for the latter, my family tries to correct them

    • @thebar5511
      @thebar5511 4 года назад +8

      Bro same lol

    • @cloudeystella5857
      @cloudeystella5857 4 года назад +10

      I relate to this so much 😭❤️

    • @sisi7304
      @sisi7304 4 года назад +3

      @@cloudeystella5857 to which comment, Peter D or adesso or The Bar or mine?

    • @mrsmccloud833
      @mrsmccloud833 4 года назад +4

      Can relate

  • @zayden1359
    @zayden1359 4 года назад +2094

    when your native language doesn't have neutral pronouns:
    *cries in portugese*

    • @domikawolf
      @domikawolf 3 года назад +151

      *complains in Polish*

    • @z3llan.446
      @z3llan.446 3 года назад +54

      i'm portuguese too, i know the pain😭🤚

    • @Immmisu
      @Immmisu 3 года назад +37

      O pior é shitposter fazendo piada com isso

    • @zayden1359
      @zayden1359 3 года назад +17

      @@Immmisu o pior mesmo é o pessoal do Twitter tentando forçar pronome neutro no português

    • @luizguilhermebatistadealme9083
      @luizguilhermebatistadealme9083 3 года назад +28

      “Eles” is an alternative pronoun because it’s gender neutral, but creating a third gender flexion is hard

  • @StarrDarlingg
    @StarrDarlingg 4 года назад +5608

    I heard someone say:
    “Cis people don’t spend hours agonizing over if they’re cis or not” and that’s something I use all the time

    • @rf0656
      @rf0656 4 года назад +343

      oh

    • @Sophia-mk1xl
      @Sophia-mk1xl 4 года назад +335

      this really made me feel valid thank you

    • @Esto_Quod_Es_iii
      @Esto_Quod_Es_iii 4 года назад +84

      Ohh, hehheheh. Weeelllll--

    • @JodieTotman
      @JodieTotman 4 года назад +194

      This is how I figured I was probably gay, as my little gay brain asked myself so many questions!

    • @heckinghummus2863
      @heckinghummus2863 4 года назад +231

      Ahh but sometimes I think I’m just overthinking it lol

  • @mgsgamer8340
    @mgsgamer8340 4 года назад +7399

    -non binary
    -asexual
    -aromantic
    The no-trio

    • @sage9653
      @sage9653 4 года назад +867

      *high five* I'm aromantic, asexual and agender

    • @mgsgamer8340
      @mgsgamer8340 4 года назад +133

      adesso.laurenzo
      Lol I can’t believe I couldn’t get this notification (I don’t check mails it’s like 10,000 at this point) but thx love youuu

    • @WallebyDamned
      @WallebyDamned 4 года назад +124

      We need a club jacket.
      Or maybe a spade jacket 😉

    • @savemefromtheworldplease1477
      @savemefromtheworldplease1477 4 года назад +84

      I actually think I'm asexual, I'm non-binary, and I thought I was aromantic a couple months ago.

    • @randomagenderpeep4411
      @randomagenderpeep4411 4 года назад +53

      @@sage9653 I HAVE FINALLY FOUND ANOTHER ANGENDERRRRRRR TwT finnaly, umm anyways, sorry, just happy!

  • @zaynubcajee6534
    @zaynubcajee6534 4 года назад +2461

    and to all the enby's reading the comment section , u r valid and loved and accepted

    • @MiChAel-st6pg
      @MiChAel-st6pg 4 года назад +8

      Thankyou 😘💖💖💕

    • @cuchilioz7723
      @cuchilioz7723 4 года назад +6

      May I ask what that is? An enby..

    • @FaebleTheWitch
      @FaebleTheWitch 4 года назад +19

      @Mr Lopez Here's the attention you ordered, sorry if it's a little cold, would you like me to bring it back to the chef?

    • @FaebleTheWitch
      @FaebleTheWitch 4 года назад +8

      @Mr Lopez ah, sorry sir we're no longer serving upsetty spaghetti, but we appreciate your patronage

    • @FaebleTheWitch
      @FaebleTheWitch 4 года назад +6

      @Mr Lopez ah you know, as much as I like banter it really isnt the most productive way of talking to people believe things like "being nonbinary is attention-seeky". Do you feel like gender identity correlates to being narcissistic? If so, why?

  • @pizzafur228
    @pizzafur228 3 года назад +1694

    My grandmother said to me at one point: “I have one wonderful granddaughter” to which I said “no.” I’ll carry on the conversation.
    “Why ‘no’?”
    “I’m not a granddaughter”
    “Grandson?”
    “No?”
    “Grandchild”
    “Yes”
    That’s how I ended up coming out to my grandmother, it was such a weight off my shoulders even if no one else knows.

    • @Trashamations
      @Trashamations 3 года назад +77

      That is very wholesome

    • @tami7992
      @tami7992 3 года назад +35

      So wholesome 💛💜🖤

    • @Mistyfog.exe.1
      @Mistyfog.exe.1 3 года назад +22

      AAAAAAA I LOVE YOUR GRANDMA

    • @tubsoo
      @tubsoo 3 года назад +9

      I love your grandma and thats how im coming out

    • @prakritisaini6100
      @prakritisaini6100 3 года назад +17

      Aww! Your grandma is really sweet!!

  • @xxtrixietheclown23xx6
    @xxtrixietheclown23xx6 4 года назад +1233

    I'm nonbinary but like wearing makeup because it's pretty.

    • @kayypaidfr
      @kayypaidfr 4 года назад +212

      you can be non binary and wear makeup:))

    • @xxtrixietheclown23xx6
      @xxtrixietheclown23xx6 4 года назад +32

      @@kayypaidfr yay ^^

    • @StarryPrism
      @StarryPrism 4 года назад +26

      Same i dont like a lot of make up just decent like eyeliner and stuff

    • @aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa3160
      @aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa3160 4 года назад +12

      So your a femenime non binary :>

    • @doentoearth735
      @doentoearth735 4 года назад +44

      you're nonbinary *AND* like wearing makeup because it's pretty ^^

  • @lukas8379
    @lukas8379 4 года назад +5312

    The pain when my language doesn't have an equivalent term to “they” :(

    • @salocin791
      @salocin791 4 года назад +454

      Same tho
      Germany is weird tbh

    • @Chelaysiahsaturn
      @Chelaysiahsaturn 4 года назад +148

      Dutch ppl have hen but most dont.wanna.use.it my.english class doesn't.want.to.use.they.pronouns.for.me

    • @miwazzz
      @miwazzz 4 года назад +140

      Same :(
      Im arabic :'(

    • @feck5491
      @feck5491 4 года назад +154

      you could use neopronouns!

    • @dreamii6880
      @dreamii6880 4 года назад +30

      Omg saaaame!!!

  • @bepis602
    @bepis602 4 года назад +2502

    Me: has been doubting my gender identity for years, done tons and tons of research and has chest dysphoria
    Also me: idk man might be faking it 🤔

    • @shadow_7881
      @shadow_7881 4 года назад +100

      Honestly mood

    • @snowinthesummertimed9269
      @snowinthesummertimed9269 4 года назад +220

      That’s literally me though. I’m watching this video because I’m thinking “you’re probably not non binary you just *want* to be so you’re faking it” even though I identify as non binary and hate when people use she/her pronouns and all the other non binary stuff. I’m definitely nb.

    • @shadow_7881
      @shadow_7881 4 года назад +14

      @@snowinthesummertimed9269 same

    • @l-insomnity-l2274
      @l-insomnity-l2274 4 года назад +146

      My brain is over here like you just wanna be different and special this is all fake you dont actually feel this way, then I get misgendered or take a good look at my own body and I'm like oh right that's why. And then an hour later it's like "you just forced yourself to feel that way because you want to" and it's a cycle 😔

    • @boopydoopy9156
      @boopydoopy9156 4 года назад +4

      Same

  • @justme-et3sr
    @justme-et3sr 3 года назад +1163

    I mean, if I want a lower voice, want to have a top surgery, wear a binder often, hate the femininity that I associate with having periods, but don't feel like a man and don't like he/him pronouns but am delighted by they/them... how can people say I'm fucking faking it.

    • @Ciel-sp4lg
      @Ciel-sp4lg 3 года назад +52

      This^^^^^^^^^

    • @hunt_er92
      @hunt_er92 3 года назад +39

      Relate to all of this

    • @shutup4211
      @shutup4211 3 года назад +19

      can relate

    • @leledk0725
      @leledk0725 3 года назад +19

      I've never related to something more in my life, tyyyy

    • @eddie8409
      @eddie8409 3 года назад +40

      i relate but im also the person saying im faking it

  • @skylasandoodles
    @skylasandoodles 4 года назад +1682

    This was helpful, I'm gonna go back now **walks into closet**

    • @massive.nerd.potential
      @massive.nerd.potential 3 года назад +61

      How is this so relatable.
      I'm spending a lot of time in my literal closet-

    • @beep1070
      @beep1070 3 года назад +20

      I stay in my closet when I cry and it's great

    • @linshiiin
      @linshiiin 3 года назад +14

      My closet is literally where I’m always at, It’s just comfortable here TvT

    • @oatmeal82
      @oatmeal82 3 года назад +14

      No ya gotta be ✨extra✨ moonwalk into the closet

    • @dootskely2923
      @dootskely2923 3 года назад +6

      press y to same

  • @havenwalkowiak3233
    @havenwalkowiak3233 4 года назад +1529

    Me: trying to think back to when I was young
    My childhood trauma leading to my current depression: N O . Y O U C A N' T R E M E M B E R .

  • @pagenein
    @pagenein 4 года назад +565

    I think an important thing to remember is that there’s a difference between wanting to dress androgynously because you know it will make people see you as non-binary/the gender you weren’t assigned at birth, and wanting to dress androgynously because that’s just the style of clothing you like. I feel like it’s common among enbies to like dressing androgynously because of how it makes people see us, but also be afraid to dress in a more commonly feminine/masculine way because what if that means we’re not non-binary? Shouldn’t I want to dress andro all the time? No! Guess what, it’s totally fine for enbies to enjoy any style of clothing (because clothes don’t have gender) AND at the same time acknowledge that androgynous clothing makes you feel good because you know it may affect how people see you and think of you.
    For example, I personally love dresses and how it feels physically to wear them, but sometimes wearing one in public can make me feel dysphoric because I feel like it makes people see me and think of me as a girl. THAT’S what I’m not entirely comfortable with. It’s not the dress, it’s the way people needlessly gender clothes. **eye roll** As a result, I mostly wear androgynous clothes now a days, BUT I also wear them because I DO like them (I kinda like all styles of clothing lol). My point is, don’t let gender-roles stop you from wearing the clothes you like and looking cool as heck, whatever that means for you personally! Stay strong non-binary squad

    • @Abel-lt5nr
      @Abel-lt5nr 4 года назад +5

      Thank you so much! 💜 I feel the same way, I have 2 dresses because I like how they look but I rarely use them because I don’t want people to see me like that . More recently I started to use them more around my friends and is nice when I feel comfortable.

    • @glen2764
      @glen2764 4 года назад +3

      Thank you! Some styles that I wear are more masculine and most are more feminine, but of course that is only to society. I want to be able to dress how I want

    • @pagenein
      @pagenein 4 года назад +1

      @@Abel-lt5nr I relate so much to that! I really want to experiment more both with clothes that are masculine and feminine, but I usually just end up wearing a somewhat andro t-shirt or sweater ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    • @pagenein
      @pagenein 4 года назад

      @@glen2764 I feel the same! The easiest thing would maybe be to just stop caring what everyone thinks of you and wear whatever, but unfortunately it's hard to not care, especially when you feel like most people don't even know that your identity exists..

    • @glen2764
      @glen2764 4 года назад +4

      Page Acutually turns out I’m gender fluid. I kinda switch around every day and sometimes i change every half a day. Like yesterday I felt most comfortable with non-binary for half the day then the other half more as a Dani girl kinda gender. Today I’m feeling more masculine. And my presentation changes day to day because of this. It would explain why every day felt kinda different gender wise. The most common spot for me is the non-binary and off the spectrum.

  • @atlas6477
    @atlas6477 3 года назад +136

    The pain when you know youre non-binary but can't tell your parents or get a binder to see how it feels

    • @char-ms2wh
      @char-ms2wh 3 года назад +6

      Yeah that's pretty much me right now just found out I'm non binary and I want a binder but I'm not out to my mom and coming out to her feels mentally and emotionally draining to me

    • @NokoYT902
      @NokoYT902 3 года назад +3

      Same I feel the exact same way

    • @CS-dp1ph
      @CS-dp1ph Год назад

      Same I don’t know what I am but I’m not cis so probably non binary or trans. I’m so scared to come out because I will have to fight to be accepted and if I get it wrong my family will never understand or respect my identity and I’ll be stuck in the closet forever😢

    • @CharaDreemurr-tn5nm
      @CharaDreemurr-tn5nm 10 месяцев назад +2

      Same! I want a bi- *cough* I NEED a binder but I think that my parents won't understand :(

    • @benjaminfranklin8412
      @benjaminfranklin8412 9 месяцев назад

      Binders harm your body. Only a cult would tell you to harm your body.

  • @Kamitzz
    @Kamitzz 4 года назад +305

    Swedish has a word like “he” (han) or her” (hon) for people that are non binary; “hen”.

  • @urMOM-wg4cp
    @urMOM-wg4cp 4 года назад +1038

    i was born a girl, but being a guy doesn’t feel right, neither does being a girl
    edit: nvm i’d rather be a guy than a girl
    edit: STILL NON-BINARY I THINK JDBFJFBFNB
    edit: 🧍 777 likes/ why do i keep seeing 7’s around

    • @urMOM-wg4cp
      @urMOM-wg4cp 4 года назад +8

      Jaden :•)!! were not alone, i hope ur okay!!

    • @killuazoldyck2630
      @killuazoldyck2630 4 года назад +3

      Same ^^

    • @togahimiko8903
      @togahimiko8903 4 года назад +16

      same, but parents are scary, and don't like that one of my friends are LGBTQIA+, little do they know I have a girlfriend

    • @indiemoon4546
      @indiemoon4546 4 года назад +4

      same. help meeeee!!!!!!!!

    • @urMOM-wg4cp
      @urMOM-wg4cp 4 года назад +10

      @@togahimiko8903 ah please stay safe! don’t come out unless u know things r gunna be ok and such!! i hope they turn around soon

  • @SoybeanAlibi
    @SoybeanAlibi 4 года назад +1620

    i go by they/them pronouns online and with close friends and a few days ago, my family kept on calling me young lady, girl, and princess. i felt very uncomfortable, does that have any meaning?

    • @snailstuff933
      @snailstuff933 4 года назад +298

      TrashCosplayz_ Alex I feel the same way I’ve always wanted nothing to do with being a girl. And in the past week I was working with my friend cleaning a house and the people there kept referring to me/us as “the lady’s” “girls” and it made me feel extremely uncomfortable... I rlly wanted to tell him that that upset me but I’m too scared. To be honest it made me feel a little bit better when I saw ur comment cuz I feel the same way and I feel like I shouldn’t.

    • @sisi7304
      @sisi7304 4 года назад +108

      if you feel uncomfortable, tell them! give your name/pronouns! they are also welcome to ask (as I would to most people) but if they can't see how uncomfortable you are, inform them

    • @urmomsman7
      @urmomsman7 4 года назад +48

      I feel the same way. But luckily im not 'princess' or something like that im a savage monkey. Yeah ive been called a monkey my my parents my whole life so i dont have that problem. Its mostly with teachers because i feel uncomfortable both being called 'young lady' but also telling them im non-binary or my pronouns

    • @jamieisnotokay3298
      @jamieisnotokay3298 4 года назад +61

      Yeah. I put my hair in space buns and my grandparents came over. I've never really disliked being feminine, but being called girl and she.. It just makes me uncomfortable. I don't know how to feel honestly. I also have this fear that if I experiment then people will think I'm attention seeking.. But I feel so uncomfortable.

    • @dreamieramune
      @dreamieramune 4 года назад +54

      Abby Can't Even “I also have this fear that if i experiment then people will think i’m attention seeking”
      i cannot describe how much i relate to that, i also feel like i don’t have a valid reason. but i’m afraid of going by they/them because i feel like people will think i’m just trying to fit in or look unique or something when it just doesn’t feel right when i get called she/her

  • @Ciel-sp4lg
    @Ciel-sp4lg 4 года назад +188

    A major sign that I was enby is the thing where I stare at myself in the mirror and dissociate while thinking about how the thing I’m seeing isn’t really me

  • @mainaccount1238
    @mainaccount1238 4 года назад +479

    Me: haha i love wearing this tight sports bra
    Also me: haha i love short hair
    Also me: haha i love boy shorts and socks and only wear black
    Random person: " *he* "
    Me: ...no...
    Me: i love cute skirt and thigh highs and cute Sailor Moon shirt
    Person: " *she* "
    Me: ...no...
    Person: "t h e h e l l a r e y o u t h e n?"
    Me: a p e r s o n

    • @spider_flash509
      @spider_flash509 3 года назад +19

      @Glenn heterophobia isn’t a thing??? the person isn’t exactly a great person considering they assumed op’s gender and gender things that’s shouldn’t be gendered? also this is a joke chill

    • @bugz2577
      @bugz2577 3 года назад +7

      @Glenn no... It's completely fine to correct someone on your pronouns and name, and it shows that you have respect for yourself. If someone gets mad at that than they might be transphobic:/

    • @_jelly-yuzi_9713
      @_jelly-yuzi_9713 2 года назад +2

      @@Torera216 I think you misunderstood, their talking about how since they do this stuff people gender them.

    • @shaykso
      @shaykso 2 года назад +1

      @@Torera216 that's not what they're saying 💀
      They're saying that because they do these things, others assume that they are a certain gender or go by certain pronouns when that's not the case and regardless of hoe they dress or what they like they're non binary
      What the person was saying was quite literally the opposite of sexism and was opposing stereotypes

    • @giddy9831
      @giddy9831 Год назад

      Fashion style doesn't equal gender

  • @itzroxychan3695
    @itzroxychan3695 4 года назад +685

    When you italian, and people aren’t used to say “Loro/essi” (they/ them in Italian).
    *P A I N*

    • @facemelter8610
      @facemelter8610 4 года назад +10

      felt 💔

    • @alilo6248
      @alilo6248 4 года назад +7

      Non sono non-binary però posso capire😔

    • @bruneperillo2247
      @bruneperillo2247 4 года назад +38

      if this makes you feel any better, loro in spanish means parrot. your pronouns are parrots(?

    • @angelicidio
      @angelicidio 4 года назад +20

      in spanish nobody uses "elle" 😞

    • @itzroxychan3695
      @itzroxychan3695 4 года назад +9

      @@bruneperillo2247 okay this made me feel better, thanks

  • @boo5368
    @boo5368 4 года назад +306

    I was born female and I'm still closeted. Being born into a very Christian "God says wear skirts! You are gonna marry a manly man!" household means my parents have always made me have very long hair and NEVER allowed me to wear pants. I feel gender disphoryia very strongly and am afraid to come out. I don't know if my friends will accept me, or even my family. I don't know if I will ever be able to start binding or get a hair cut while still a minor. But these videos make me feel safe, included, and valid, so thank you. ❤️❤️❤️

    • @fishstew2573
      @fishstew2573 4 года назад

      Lola G get off tumblr please.

    • @artistry6081
      @artistry6081 4 года назад +27

      Fish stew rude

    • @fishstew2573
      @fishstew2573 4 года назад

      【Artistry】 get off tumblr please.

    • @mng3941
      @mng3941 4 года назад +34

      @@fishstew2573 I'm off of Tumblr while talking to you. Stop being rude. Lola is a valid human being.

    • @fishstew2573
      @fishstew2573 4 года назад

      M NG valid is an idiotic term and lola is just a gender nonconforming female. just because she isn't hyper feminine doesn't mean she's an imaginary third gender. get off tumblr, it's a cesspool.

  • @stevie293
    @stevie293 3 года назад +410

    I’m experimenting with she/they, and it feels honestly quite natural for me

    • @gracie7534
      @gracie7534 3 года назад +23

      I have a question. I don't mind what people assume of my gender, but I don't like when people automatically assume I'm a girl. Even online... so.. *sorry if this is not a very good question, I'm not very good at asking*

    • @gracie7534
      @gracie7534 3 года назад +5

      @Emily uwu omg same here finally someone who relates to me
      I feel like im just labeling myself.... and I am not enjoying this :\
      anybody here have any advice for this

    • @arnasingh9051
      @arnasingh9051 3 года назад +1

      @Emily uwu omg sameee

    • @NokoYT902
      @NokoYT902 3 года назад

      Are you a boy? And just figuring out about non-binary and experimenting like I am

    • @auggie_on_paws
      @auggie_on_paws 3 года назад +9

      @Emily uwu sameee. I'm also using she/they pronouns- And I also have this like- feeling I'm "faking it" even tho I'm not rlly. Like I feel like I'm just labeling myself basically TvT. I haven't told anyone yet either. Like I feel more more feminine than masculine (that felt weird to type for some reason lol) but still enough that I'm questioning my gender and such- Ree- Any advice?

  • @cass1099
    @cass1099 4 года назад +177

    The gays can really sense when there's another gay nearby. I got this weird vibe from someone at the boardwalk (this was in 2019 ) and she saw me staring at her. She said "youre my friend now" and we exchanged numbers. She is a lesbian, and im questioning my gender and know my sexual and romantic orientations.

  • @liampantaleon9070
    @liampantaleon9070 4 года назад +613

    I think I may be non-binary but I’m scared it’s just a phase. 😅

    • @teriyaki_wings
      @teriyaki_wings 4 года назад +177

      Mosca Reus yeah, you don’t get to tell people how to feel or identify.

    • @ray4955
      @ray4955 4 года назад +140

      @@Mosk314 There's a difference between being a feminine male and a masculine female, and actually feeling as if you're the wrong gender.

    • @whywhy844
      @whywhy844 4 года назад +47

      @Mosca Reus Wtf if you are going to type something type it well

    • @scarb5256
      @scarb5256 4 года назад +103

      Mosca Reus actually (and sorry if I sound snarky) gender has nothing to do with organs, chromosomes, or genitalia. A lot of people confuse sex and gender (very understandable) so here you go:
      Sex - the chromosomes, organs, and genitalia
      Gender - the identity
      It’s easy to mix them up so no worries about that. Non binary actually does exist and it’s really interesting! Look into articles by people like the Mayo Clinic and national LGBTQ organizations. Those aren’t the only two options those are just to start. Also you will be interested to find that cases of non binary people date back to the native Americans, even earlier probably! Look it up (and use reliable sources). I can (almost) guarantee that you will be fascinated with what you find. Please do try to change your mind on the subject. It can be hard to understand how somebody could not feel like either sex because it doesn’t feel normal but if you also look into how history has normalized heterosexuality and cisgender people, while denormalizing homosexuality and transgender people. There is a lot more LGBT history out there then you would think. Have a nice day and do please try to change your mind!

    • @teriyaki_wings
      @teriyaki_wings 4 года назад +44

      Also wanted to add, don’t be scared. You’re allowed to try out different identities, pronouns and clothes to find what works best for you. And you don’t even have to label your feelings if you don’t want to or if it doesn’t make you comfortable, plenty of people don’t and that’s perfectly okay. Experimenting doesn’t make you any less valid.

  • @JacksonH8r
    @JacksonH8r 4 года назад +179

    So I'm demigender. So I feel basically half female. Some days I'm happy with being female, and I'm happy with my body (Ex: feeling like I can wear a bra instead of a binder and being okay with my genitalia) Other days I don't feel happy with my body, I feel like I need a binder but I also am happy with my female genitals. So I never feel male, I just feel half female. I feel like demigender is such a misunderstood topic and I would love for someone to talk about it

    • @JacksonH8r
      @JacksonH8r 4 года назад +19

      @Gay Fem Boy UwU I just kinda didn't feel fully female. But I also didn't feel fully non-binary. I guess it kinda felt like something was.. missing-?

    • @sallysoniclover
      @sallysoniclover 3 года назад +4

      i identify as a demigirl and i wish more people talked about demigender

    • @user-bv9ho5fi9g
      @user-bv9ho5fi9g 3 года назад

      @@sallysoniclover yeah same

    • @Anonymous-qp3kd
      @Anonymous-qp3kd 3 года назад +4

      I feel like I’m demigender because I feel more female than non binary but more non binary than female and it’s like ughhh. On a spectrum I feel in between nonbinary and female. She/they seems to fit me really well

    • @pinkelephant4591
      @pinkelephant4591 3 года назад +1

      I'm a demiwoman and not out. Feels like too much to explain to people

  • @bumblebeagan
    @bumblebeagan 4 года назад +212

    when I first started to question my gender identity, I always thought I was just faking it cuz sometimes I would be uncomfortable with she/her and women's bathrooms and sometimes I would be completely fine
    and then I heard of genderfluidity! it made me so comfortable, I'm not wondering if I'm faking anything or unsure anymore and I can just be whomever i want, whenever i want!

    • @littlecousin8716
      @littlecousin8716 3 года назад +9

      At the moment i feel so unvalid and feel like i'm faking it. Because in the last days i was Very comfortable being a girl. I just think i'm faking it. Even though the days before i really had bad dysphoria. And it sucks. Because it's kinda like there's no day where i feel comfortable. I don't know how to accept my feminine side. Do you have any Tips?
      P. S. I'm Sorry for the long Text XD

    • @bumblebeagan
      @bumblebeagan 3 года назад +5

      @@littlecousin8716 while I'd like to give you some foolproof answer, I don't actually have one. its not really a "tips and tricks" kind of problem, yknow? So it's a pretty complicated and long answer, I hope you don't mind; I'll include a TL:DR at the end, and feel free to ask for clarification on anything lol
      there were several factors that played a part into me accepting my feminine side. The biggest part was not actively rejecting it. I realized that I actually really loved things I'd said I hated and dubbed as feminine before. I'd kinda shunned them all my life because I didn't want to seem feminine and make other people think I was faking it. I was super worried about what other people would think, if someone who "supposedly" wasn't a girl started loving pink, yknow?
      that leads me to my second biggest reason: my brother. He's transgender, and has been a super big influence on my life. I only knew that genderfluid was a thing because of him lol. But even as a guy, he loves some feminine things, and one thing he said stuck out to me: "It's great confusing people, being a transgender guy in touch with my feminine side."
      so my honest answer?
      Spite and chaos were my biggest helpers in accepting my femininity. Yes, it's annoying at times, having to correct people all the time. But being able to say "fuck those shits" about the transphobes who don't accept me and set expectations for who they think I am is worth it.
      I'm not a person who'll just say "don't care about other people's opinions" and shit, cuz it's kind of impossible for the average person. Humans are social creatures, we crave validation. But you have to learn to pick and choose which opinions to care about. I have my brother, my partner,, and my friends who support me and validate me, so those are the opinions I care about.
      But I don't know how your life works and how many people you know of who are supporting you. But even just having one can change how the world works for you.
      But basically, confidence and self-assurance are key. but those come from acceptance of yourself, right? they build like a corkscrew, slowly helping each other grow. but you just gotta give it a starting point, be it even spite :)
      TL:DR: don't actively reject your feminine side by thinking you're faking it. you are you, and you're whoever you want to be. don't let anyone tell you otherwise. and mainly, find a starting point, be it accepting one small thing you thought was feminine and owning it as male or nonbinary, or just wanting to spite those dumbass transphobes. it's different for everyone, but you got this :)

    • @littlecousin8716
      @littlecousin8716 3 года назад +4

      @@bumblebeagan thank you so much for your loving reply. Even though i know that the acceptance have to come from myself your understanding and everything you wrote helped me. Thank you ^^

    • @bumblebeagan
      @bumblebeagan 3 года назад +3

      @@littlecousin8716 of course! I'm super glad I can help, and i hope you can reach the level of acceptance you want ^-^

    • @benjaminfranklin8412
      @benjaminfranklin8412 9 месяцев назад

      You can trick yourself to believe anything. Seek sex-affirming psychotherapy

  • @freak82
    @freak82 4 года назад +173

    I never feel comfortable when my parents say “Your a girl so you have to shave, shower everyday, look like a girl, etc”

    • @shivamsrivastava6312
      @shivamsrivastava6312 4 года назад +9

      You don't shower every day?

    • @swirl-s3777
      @swirl-s3777 4 года назад +8

      @@shivamsrivastava6312 No

    • @zakourille
      @zakourille 4 года назад +11

      @@shivamsrivastava6312 i know this dude and he showers once a week with soap and inbetween only casually to freshen up in the summer if he feels like it and he smells fine but idk. also there are some skin experts who say it may be harmful to shower daily unless you do hard labour daily/sweat more than average

    • @dawgie8102
      @dawgie8102 4 года назад +9

      im a girl i never shaved cuz i wear something that doesnt show much skin👽🥰

    • @zennisgone
      @zennisgone 4 года назад +2

      I hate it

  • @SugarPuppy06
    @SugarPuppy06 4 года назад +182

    I always knew I was androgynous because I didn't care what I wore, mens or woman's, but as soon as I hit 12-13 I felt really uncomfortable with my chest and I hated my long hair because it was a "girly thing". Then one day I was watching a video on youtube and 'nonbinary' was mentioned. I didn't know what it ment so I googled it, and everything it listed related to me: I hated the seperation of girls and boys because I didn't feel comfortable in either, I had some dysphoria in my chest and my hair, I kinda hurt inside when I was called a girl or she/her, I wanted to be androgynous, but was kinda scared to look that way. So I tried everything in my power to look more fem. I wore heavy makeup, girly clothes, wedges, jewlery, I used girly school supplies, etc. It got so bad to the point where I wouldn't leave the house without a full face of makeup. Then quarantine hit. And I looked more into nonbinary and what it ment. I was home all day so I tried out different looks. I would wear more masc clothes I had, I put my hair in a ponytail and flipped it and put a hat on so my hair looked short, etc. I felt more cofterable with they/them pronouns but I told nobody because I was scared. So I lied to my parents and said I wanted my hair short because I didn't want to brush it. So I got it cut super short, and shaved one side of my head. I felt almost ok. The only thing was my chest. I would wear a oversized jacket everyday to hide it. Now I wear less makeup, I wear a mix of fem and masc clothes, and try different looks. I am out as Nonbinary to my dad, but he says 'I will always be a girl in his eyes' so it's like a hit to the heart, and my friends know, but they still call me she/her. I still have dysphoria in my chest, but I suffer through it because I haven't told my mom because I am scared too. Sorry for the super long comment, but I just had to get it all out there.

    • @shadow_7881
      @shadow_7881 4 года назад +12

      So sorry that your dad and friends haven't accepted your gender identity, hopefully they do in the future. Dysphoria sucks, maybe you could try a binder in the future?

    • @xxpandacookiexxgacha3699
      @xxpandacookiexxgacha3699 4 года назад +6

      I came out to my mom as non-binary she thought i just wanted to be a tomboy i told her my pronouns they/them she still uses she/her

    • @ducky_universe
      @ducky_universe 4 года назад +4

      Don't worry about it being kinda long. We all need to vent somewhere. I have gone through a lot of the stuff you were describing in the beginning, and I think I'm non-binary but I don't think my parents will react well. I hope that when you do tell your mom, everything goes well. Good luck!

    • @rowill9939
      @rowill9939 4 года назад +4

      i dont feel good about my chest or my long hair, so i get a bun and try to ignore the chest.. im not sure if im trans or non binary tho but i have a strong connection to non binary!
      ps. i havent came out yet because im kinda scared how my mom will react

    • @aWERFRGT6545BGFG
      @aWERFRGT6545BGFG 4 года назад +1

      just never forget that no breasts at all is a boy thing...so you gotta have middle ground to be truly androgynous......or at least recognize that some enby people would be fine with breasts

  • @ashnscar21
    @ashnscar21 4 года назад +113

    "gender dysphoria is when u feel urghh-" - Lorenzo 2020

  • @liangailm.ilagan4153
    @liangailm.ilagan4153 3 года назад +329

    Me, who's native language has they/them: * happiness noises *

    • @krillbeans8620
      @krillbeans8620 3 года назад +3

      What is your native language?

    • @Bread-_
      @Bread-_ 3 года назад

      Lol same

    • @-k1-91
      @-k1-91 3 года назад

      Same

    • @unknowndude5279
      @unknowndude5279 3 года назад +1

      Ego te exardescam sicut reiteratis, qua urebam anteacta vita mea.

    • @vihoe
      @vihoe 3 года назад +1

      for me i speak tagalog and it has the word sya. it refers to all genders and we dont use pronouns in tagalog its literally only sya which make me so happy

  • @riverhawkshead2673
    @riverhawkshead2673 4 года назад +214

    i’m trying to figure it if i’m non-binary cause i hate being referred to as she/her or girl or anything like that. but i feel comfortable using they/them pronouns and being referred to with gender neutral terms. but i don’t really mind my body but i wouldn’t be mad if i had a guys body?

    • @stoopidcrumpet6679
      @stoopidcrumpet6679 4 года назад +20

      YOU JUST DESCRIBED WHATS BEEN HAPPENING TO ME. I’m so glad I’m not alone, don’t worry we can figure this out, we got this :)

    • @tchlol8759
      @tchlol8759 4 года назад +6

      thats literally me..

    • @nola4364
      @nola4364 4 года назад +9

      Yeah that sounds like you’re non-binary. You probably have social (gender) dysphoria but not body dysphoria. I think that’s totally a thing that some enbies experience. You don’t have to have every type of dysphoria to be non-binary.

    • @creativedesignation7880
      @creativedesignation7880 4 года назад +3

      I read something that I think is pretty smart, regarding not having physical dysphoria. It went along the lines of: You don't have to suffer for your identity to be valid, suffering is not a requirement for any gender.
      Also if you consider that waking up as the opposite sex is some serious body horror to most cis people, it is pretty safe to say that being ok with the idea of having the opposite sex tomorrow is not exactly a cis thing.

    • @RenaissanceRockerBoy
      @RenaissanceRockerBoy 4 года назад

      @@creativedesignation7880 Yeah my main thing was that I never had dysphoria, but I’ve definitely had gender euphoria when I tried on more masculine clothes (there was this jacket in particular that had this perfect mix of masculine and feminine energy and made me cry lmao), and when I think about it I’m fine with both she and they pronouns, but also fae pronouns make me happy. And the idea of someone mistaking me for a guy makes me super happy but I don’t want to be a guy lmao. And now that I’m reading this, I know I’m not cis for sure, I just think I never knew there were other options besides being binary trans. I didn’t realize it was normal to be so firmly convinced of what your gender was like cis people apparently are, which made me sure.

  • @Nicoratboy
    @Nicoratboy 4 года назад +203

    When your parent does a good job explaining gender identity’s /sexuality’s

  • @melvinjohnson2388
    @melvinjohnson2388 4 года назад +486

    You lost me at talk to close people, I have no one 😼

    • @xiiekk
      @xiiekk 4 года назад +1

      same :(

    • @sassylittleprophet
      @sassylittleprophet 4 года назад +3

      Re-late-a-ble.

    • @koffeefoxy2824
      @koffeefoxy2824 4 года назад +2

      I'll be your buddy!!

    • @frost.bytten2023
      @frost.bytten2023 4 года назад +1

      I'm on insta as Frost.Bytten. we can talk there if y'all want to. 🏳️‍🌈

    • @aaronfangheart
      @aaronfangheart 4 года назад +1

      Hi I'm Aaron I've adopted you feel free to message me via Facebook ( see RUclips user name)

  • @kermit-san7063
    @kermit-san7063 4 года назад +460

    anyways like i said gender is a social construct
    at this point i just call myself a waffle

    • @pacchinu-9428
      @pacchinu-9428 4 года назад +46

      well, you're a very valid waffle! lol.

    • @racoonafi5653
      @racoonafi5653 3 года назад +25

      Pop off waffle

    • @h0ney_bee69
      @h0ney_bee69 3 года назад +23

      A very crisp and awesome waffle

    • @Lunalla
      @Lunalla 3 года назад +5

      Nah bruh gender is not a social construct it’s backed by science and biology. The gender stereotypes that are expected of men and women is a social construct. Pls don’t spread misinformation!

    • @h0ney_bee69
      @h0ney_bee69 3 года назад +21

      @@Lunalla and sorry for the rant but I just wanted to politely tell you that you are somewhat wrong, but you are right about stereotypes.

  • @valentinedoesstuff
    @valentinedoesstuff 4 года назад +318

    You can tell im a girl, but for some reason i just feel comfortable being identified as non-binary, but im still experimenting and trying to figure out who i am 😊
    (im just too scared to come out to my parents because they think that non-binary isnt real but i hope one day i can come out to them and maybe explain to them why their wrong-)

    • @kira-py8gt
      @kira-py8gt 4 года назад +23

      me too!! i’m scared that if i came out with my mom she’ll just be like “but you’re so feminine”

    • @NatureLover-pj2qe
      @NatureLover-pj2qe 4 года назад +14

      I’m scared to come out to my family since they are transphobic.

    • @PH3NNYLEN
      @PH3NNYLEN 4 года назад +11

      Me too. I don't fell like i identify as a boy but i don't really identify as a girl either

    • @Emmaphotos111
      @Emmaphotos111 3 года назад +5

      I feel bad for you but I can relate exept it's when I told my dad I was lesbian but I'm still trying to prove him wrong I hope you all have an awesome day and I wish you luck coming out :3

    • @tw0dxts154
      @tw0dxts154 3 года назад +4

      My parents are homophobic...
      I choose to come out in college where I actually become an adult

  • @ZimLikesPastaAnimation
    @ZimLikesPastaAnimation 4 года назад +571

    Me: wants to claw off my chesticles
    Me: loathes she/her pronouns used in relation to me with a passion
    Me: hated my birth name since I was young
    Me: Feels better being seen as masculine
    Me: has been thinking I was some type of trans for over a year
    Me: wanted to be a "tomboy" since I was like 7 even though I didn't display any tomboyish traits
    Me: Started hating my body when I started hitting puberty
    Me: feels uncomfortable in gendered spaces
    Also me: but I mIGHT BE FAKING ITTT!!!!

    • @czerkitka141
      @czerkitka141 3 года назад +2

      Because you are, it is called internalized misogyne girl

    • @dawnfairy9868
      @dawnfairy9868 3 года назад +13

      @@czerkitka141 what??

    • @queerartperson5397
      @queerartperson5397 3 года назад +41

      @@czerkitka141 wanting to cut of your chest, socially transition and use non she/her pronouns is not internalised misogyny, they are most likely trans or nonbinary

    • @Zaynersyy
      @Zaynersyy 3 года назад +4

      Tomboy doesn't mean you're not feminine at all or you're not a girl. I'm a tomboy, but I'm still girl, attracted to man, quite feminine, etc. Male and female's brain are made different. You can't erase feminine inside your brain.

    • @dragonsaway9710
      @dragonsaway9710 3 года назад +5

      A RUclipsr I like watching "one topic at a time," once said "if you think you're it you aren't" and I repeat that to myself especially on bad days

  • @vengefulapparition1133
    @vengefulapparition1133 4 года назад +247

    I’m honestly having a lot of trouble with my gender and sexuality. When it comes gender I was born biologically a female but frequently feel uncomfortable when people use she and her for me, it just doesn’t feel right. But then again I feel comfortable in female bathrooms as well as boys. I have female and male friends and feel comfortable with both genders

    • @dandii5417
      @dandii5417 3 года назад +14

      Maybe you could be bigender? In case you don’t know what that is it’s when you feel two genders at the same time!

    • @papercrane3385
      @papercrane3385 3 года назад +2

      Same!

    • @Zaynersyy
      @Zaynersyy 3 года назад +2

      I have more male friends than female. I hangout with them more often. But my gender is still a female.

    • @dragonsaway9710
      @dragonsaway9710 3 года назад +6

      The gender of your friends doesn't mean anything. I have an equal amount of girl and boy friends

    • @dragonsaway9710
      @dragonsaway9710 3 года назад +2

      Nevermind, I'm probably a bad example

  • @ppunz
    @ppunz 4 года назад +127

    when i tell myself im a girl, i feel alright, when i tell myself im a boy, i feel alright. im just really confused on my identity lollll
    edit: nvm i’m non binary trans masc ⟟ think

    • @piperhh5609
      @piperhh5609 3 года назад +2

      Are u a girl or a boy?

    • @ppunz
      @ppunz 3 года назад +19

      @@piperhh5609 neither. ⟟ am 14 rats stacked in ⏃ trench coat.

    • @piperhh5609
      @piperhh5609 3 года назад

      @@ppunz oh. But we’re you born a girl or a boy? Or are u trans?

    • @dragonsaway9710
      @dragonsaway9710 3 года назад +2

      Ender language poggg

    • @v0id3333
      @v0id3333 3 года назад

      i know what non binary means but what does non binary trans masc mean? (to clear the air im genuinely asking since im questioning my gender and idkk ahhhh)

  • @PheonixLove
    @PheonixLove 4 года назад +456

    Actually I'm really questioning if I'm comfortable with my gender or not. I've always been proud of being a girl and I never even questioned that...
    During quarantine I cut my hair from really long (it was 90cm) to really short (shaved most of it off). And it feels wonderful.
    My dilemma started about a week ago. In my literature finale the two testers that were there accidentally misgendered me.
    (I'm sure that if the called me he on purpose it was because they thought that I was trans or something and tried to be respectful because they saw my ID)
    I immediately corrected them but for some reason it made me feel kind of happy and excited that they thought I was a boy and I don't really know how to explain it and I've been thinking about this all week and I'm really confused now...
    I mean, it's not that in not comfortable with being a girl, but I'm starting to feel like I don't really need a gender identity and it's confusing me...
    I found a tiktok of yours that's talking about this so I decided to come here and see this video, maybe it would help me a bit...
    (I'm writing this before watching)

  • @boingboing8979
    @boingboing8979 4 года назад +208

    I’ve been really confused since middle school, since the age of 10 I would like wearing guy clothes and putting my hair in a beanie to make it look short but I also enjoy wearing cute girl clothes . Ever since then I’ve been wanting to cut my hair and be more gender neutral but idk if I’m genderfluid or non-binary , I’m fine with any pronouns I wouldn’t mind if anyone called me ma’am or sir . I’m really confused :\ could I be non binary even if I look more like a girl ?
    Edit: hi it’s been a few weeks and I now identify as non binary and I think this is the best for me and rlly fits. Thanks to everyone who tried to help

    • @celluloes
      @celluloes 4 года назад +27

      you could totally be non binary if you look more feminine!! you dont have to dress or look androgynous to be an enby

    • @redditegg113
      @redditegg113 4 года назад +2

      No that’s just you being you

    • @scarb5256
      @scarb5256 4 года назад +15

      Reddit Egg they could be non binary. Gender expression ≠ gender identity. For example, a born-male who identifies as a male wearing feminine clothing doesn’t make him a girl, it just makes him a man who likes feminine clothing.

    • @boingboing8979
      @boingboing8979 4 года назад +8

      Wabi-sabi recently I’ve been going by as non-binary and so far I think it fits

    • @sagehoff969
      @sagehoff969 4 года назад

      You *could* be. But it's not cut and dry. Reality is, the only person that can tell you is yourself (after long hours of soul searching and reseaech)

  • @etheth2286
    @etheth2286 4 года назад +819

    That moment when u are German and Germany doesnt have they/them as pronouns: 😃👍✨

    • @renameagain5808
      @renameagain5808 4 года назад +8

      What about Mann or Ess?

    • @reginakneip8858
      @reginakneip8858 4 года назад +66

      @@renameagain5808 those more translate to "it", animals and object are referred to that way. Unfortunately not really an option in German

    • @renameagain5808
      @renameagain5808 4 года назад +15

      @@reginakneip8858 oh, ok. That sucks

    • @aresjupiter847
      @aresjupiter847 4 года назад +8

      what a pain

    • @DOKZAONE
      @DOKZAONE 4 года назад +4

      For once Germany is handling minorities right 😂😂😂😂

  • @sharkzip3128
    @sharkzip3128 3 года назад +94

    *out of character*
    My teacher: Alright, boys vs girls!
    Me, a questioning nonbinary: *yeah, about that.,*

  • @LeRouxFilms
    @LeRouxFilms 4 года назад +98

    I thought I was trans for awhile, ftm, however being identified as a guy made me uncomfortable. I don't completely like being a girl nor a guy, I always considered non binary but I was one of those people who believed there were only two genders. Maybe there's more, whether that would be three or four, I might fall under non binary or bi gender

    • @LeRouxFilms
      @LeRouxFilms 4 года назад +4

      @Randall Paquet I see what you mean, it does seem a lot more comfortable as a guy than a girl, however the only problem I have with it is OTHER GUYS lmao. I hope you figure everything out, I think right now I am a female with masculine tendencies along with a sprinkle of femininity here and there. I could go into the gender dictionary and find one that matches me perfectly, but I think I'm more comfortable with every one excepting me as a girl for now

  • @sukkibee2634
    @sukkibee2634 4 года назад +65

    The truth is that I have actually been feeling really confused about my gender,
    but I'm not quite sure about who i am, and I wouldn't want to claim myself as non-binary without actually being it.
    A few days ago, maybe a week ago, I realized that maybe i had signs of being non-binary. for example:
    -When representing myself in a drawing, I usually draw or represent myself with non-binary characters.
    Maybe that doesn't sound like a true sign, but, I realized that when people confuse my gender I feel good about myself.
    Sometimes when I see myself with long hair, or very feminine, I don't feel quite right, but at the same time if I saw myself as a man I wouldn't feel right either. I mean, I don't feel bad as a girl, but I don't feel good either.
    I realized that sometimes I feel comfortable wearing loose clothing that makes me look androgynous and having short hair.
    Sometimes I think that its quarantine affecting me, but the more I analyze it the more I get confused.
    sorry if my english is bad or if you didn't understand me. when i try to express my feelings in other language i sound really robotic u.u

    • @alexandralignell5424
      @alexandralignell5424 4 года назад +4

      It’s okay to experiment with labels and identities. If you identify as non-binary for a while and then realized that that’s not right for you, it’s okay to change what you identify with and you pronouns and stuff💖If you try something and it doesn’t work for you then you’ve only gotten closer to finding out who you truly are, by ruling out options, so don’t be afraid to experiment a little! You are valid, and even if you were to change the way you identify 10 times you would still be just as valid. There’s nothing better than finding out who you truly are and finally being yourself💖💖

    • @PH3NNYLEN
      @PH3NNYLEN 4 года назад +1

      I relate to this

    • @metra8604
      @metra8604 4 года назад +1

      same. i usually go with male characters as i don't know too well how to represent non binary, but i feel this.

    • @irishughes9130
      @irishughes9130 4 года назад +1

      I relate a lot to this

    • @massive.nerd.potential
      @massive.nerd.potential 3 года назад

      Me 1 to 1. Like.. literally 1 to 1. I relate to this so hard.

  • @Yuki_Ika7
    @Yuki_Ika7 3 года назад +37

    i am non-binary and i am fine being called he/him, she/her and they/them or any other respectful pronouns, i just go with the flow

  • @delphi_lasagna
    @delphi_lasagna 4 года назад +620

    PE teacher:
    “Girls on one side boys on the other”
    Me who wants to come out as pan/bi and non-binary but has a transphobic mother: 😃 where do I go?
    My Pe teacher assuming my gender: right side with the *other* girls
    Me angry he assumed my gender and wishes to be back in primary school with my two lesbian teachers who were the best teachers ever:
    👁💧👄👁💧👌🏻

    • @WhatIsItToBurn
      @WhatIsItToBurn 3 года назад +37

      It's not too difficult. Most of society still uses sex and gender to mean the same thing. If it's "girls one side and boys the other", take it to mean "females one side and males the other", that's what the teacher really means.

    • @Envision_
      @Envision_ 3 года назад +6

      You are delusional

    • @swingloser
      @swingloser 3 года назад +1

      @ᚱᚢᚾᛖ No just call them what they are.

    • @quintusisdead3744
      @quintusisdead3744 3 года назад +7

      @@Envision_ which person are you talking to?

    • @Zaynersyy
      @Zaynersyy 3 года назад +2

      @ᚱᚢᚾᛖ it's fine mate. I'm a female and I'm totally fine being called "he". Infact, many people has called me "he" on online voice calls because I sounds like a boy when I'm tired. It's not a big deal really. And obviously my preferences is "she".

  • @oliv6528
    @oliv6528 4 года назад +64

    i am struggling so much. i don’t know my identity or sexuality anymore. i was so sure i was a girl and bisexual but now i just know i like girl and maybe boys and i know that i am not a boy but i also don’t feel like a girl anymore. I also don’t like the non binary pronouns in german

    • @is164
      @is164 4 года назад +2

      Same here

    • @kaikatattack
      @kaikatattack 4 года назад +2

      maybe just say youre questioning. I know it can be hard sometimes. Ive been struggling too, but the most important thing to know is that you dont have to know yet. It takes a bit. (:

    • @alexandralignell5424
      @alexandralignell5424 4 года назад

      I don’t know German and what pronouns there are but there are more pronouns (in english anyways) than she/her, he/him and they/them. I’m not sure what they are but maybe you could look into that and see if they feel right for you? Hope you’ll find something soon that feels right for you!💖💖💖

    • @creativedesignation7880
      @creativedesignation7880 4 года назад

      I feel you. It may just take a while for you to really figure it out. I'm almost 30 and realized just this year that I am non-binary, not saying it will take you this long, but figuring out who you are is really a long term project. Also, yeah, German pronouns suck, I just ask people to refer to me by name, it's not perfect, but it certainly feels better.

  • @thestarkid5449
    @thestarkid5449 4 года назад +97

    I realize I didn’t really like looking like a girl last year when I put a sports bra on and it was to tight and my chest was kind of flat, I was confused because I never thought of being something other than a girl. So now almost a year later I came out to my mother and sister and non-binary (they didn’t use my correct pronouns though) and I talked to my mom about a different name and we decided on one and they might start using it!

    • @kaikatattack
      @kaikatattack 4 года назад +3

      Yay!! (:

    • @irishughes9130
      @irishughes9130 4 года назад +4

      I’ve never questioned whether I’m a girl or not until recently, I want a flat chest and I’m starting to think I might not want to be perceived as a girl, but I feel like I’m doing for attention because I never had a problem with being a girl for 13 years of my life

    • @thestarkid5449
      @thestarkid5449 4 года назад +2

      @@irishughes9130 it’s never too early to question your gender but I felt like this for a couple years so I don’t know how I feel. I’ve learned that if you feel like your faking it your probably not you should just experiment and see if you like different pronouns and name

    • @Emmaphotos111
      @Emmaphotos111 3 года назад +1

      Awsome job I'm still stuck between being trans gender and Nonbinary but I know I'm lesbian

    • @anatawaniwatori
      @anatawaniwatori 3 года назад

      Can I ask how you found a name? Bc I’m thinking about it but I don’t even know where to start

  • @savannahaldridge8884
    @savannahaldridge8884 4 года назад +71

    I was born a biological female and for my whole life I’ve identified as a female and gone by she/her pronouns. I didn’t necessarily feel really uncomfortable or like weird when people referred to me as she/her but I kinda did feel like not entirely satisfied or like fulfilled if that makes sense. Just kinda like meh. Recently I’ve done research and I don’t think that strictly going by they/them is me fully. So i feel like the pronouns that best fit me are both she AND they. But like idk bc I don’t want to invalidate anyone or anything. I also know that identifying as both non binary and a woman is kind of like hard for people to understand but when I think about identifying as both, I experience gender euphoria like my heart does a little dance lmao Idk if this made any sense lolll

    • @imsojulia-b9k
      @imsojulia-b9k 4 года назад +10

      I think you should look at 'demigirl', it's a label for those who feel partly female, and partly genderless, many demigirls go by she/they. I hope this helps

    • @savannahaldridge8884
      @savannahaldridge8884 4 года назад +4

      @@imsojulia-b9k that makes so much sense !! Thank u for the help!!

    • @imsojulia-b9k
      @imsojulia-b9k 4 года назад +2

      @@savannahaldridge8884 your welcome!

    • @weirdflex8158
      @weirdflex8158 3 года назад

      yea its because your delusional and attention seeking im not trying to be mean im just telling you the truth think about your actions more please

    • @violabatler6342
      @violabatler6342 Год назад +1

      Maybe you are demigirl or paragirl?

  • @prettylix9771
    @prettylix9771 3 года назад +23

    My mom just walked in on me watching this and I haven’t told her yet I’m so happy that I’m able to come up with believable lies on the spot 😓

  • @DrJamesOnjen
    @DrJamesOnjen 4 года назад +133

    sex: male
    gender: non binary
    Sexuality: pansexual
    My "girlfriend and fiancee":
    Sex: female
    gender: sort of non binary xD
    Sexuality: pansexual
    ... It's this relationship where I'm thinking about buying her a binder as a present, because I know she would like to dress up as a male and she is helping me with my makeup when I'm crossdressing as a female sometimes. We both where raised pretty much cis till we got 16 or 18 in my case xD we met on tinder two and a half years ago. We found out about our sexualities the day after we had a match, met a few days later and deleted tinder and burried it in the nearby forest or something or at least that's how I remember it

    • @tuesdaywithanh
      @tuesdaywithanh 4 года назад +5

      Awwwwwww that's cute :D

    • @fragmentsofanusha
      @fragmentsofanusha 4 года назад +7

      Aww that’s so awesome, does your partner prefer female pronouns? I’m glad yous are so supportive of each other, me and my wife are a little like this she’s tran feminine/trans female and has been in and out of the closet and I try to encourage and protect her whereas I’m more non binary and she encourages me to dress masculine when I want to

  • @creamimochi6326
    @creamimochi6326 4 года назад +28

    I remember one time I was playing a game with some friends online and a cousin of a friend there joined and we played for a little, and after a while, he asked if I was a boy or not. I felt pretty happy after hearing that. And another time, when I was at school, we were talking about random stuff, and I don’t really know how we got to this point, but then they started saying stuff like “Your basically a boy because of how much you act like us” (All of the friends were males btw) and that made me really happy as well. A third time was when I was commenting on a video and someone replied after chatting a bit, “Wait what do you go by, I called you a girl and I don’t even know” and I replied with “oh call me whatever it doesn’t matter” and then they continues to call me a girl, that made me kinda irk a little bit. (Wow this is getting long) A fourth time was when we were in P.E. and we were doing separate teams of boys and girls, and, obviously, I was sent to the girls team. I looked over to the boys teams and felt myself really hoping I was with the guys. I don’t really know what I wanna go by, but I know it’s definitely not a female. Thank you for reading this nonsense :)

  • @livi2335
    @livi2335 4 года назад +94

    I feel like she/her doesnt fit but other people say it does, I feel like I'm a she/they is better so im gonna see how it fits 😁

    • @metra8604
      @metra8604 4 года назад +6

      to me i feel more he/they even though im currently a she/her. i don't like being a she/her tho.

    • @reganmyers3649
      @reganmyers3649 3 года назад +8

      I tried the she/they pronouns since I didn't always feel like a woman and felt more in the middle and that clicked for me and felt right; just know you are valid and your identity and your pronouns are valid too. I hope whatever you choose goes well!

    • @annaparr9218
      @annaparr9218 3 года назад +3

      i asked my best friend to call me by she/they pronouns to experiment.

    • @annaparr9218
      @annaparr9218 3 года назад +9

      update i identify with she/her pronouns

    • @sunhopii8534
      @sunhopii8534 3 года назад

      I've been currently experimenting with she/they pronouns, will update

  • @June-sq1ub
    @June-sq1ub 3 года назад +17

    "Try really, really hard to just be as authentic to yourself as much as you're able to" ♡

  • @gracie.proudlock
    @gracie.proudlock 4 года назад +88

    your words never fail to make me feel better laurenzo! this sort of information is good to get around! thank you for making this video :)💚

  • @buns5598
    @buns5598 4 года назад +55

    I love being feminine and feel okay with my gender, but sometimes I like knowing I don’t look like a specific gender and I like to be called they/them more then she/her but I’m still okay with it idk if I’m still valid or I just like androgynous looking styles, and I’m very confident in my body but I’m still very confused

    • @hauntedshadowslegacy2826
      @hauntedshadowslegacy2826 4 года назад +5

      I feel ya. I'm fine with my body, but idk if I really care what pronouns people use on me. Would love a bit of clarity, personally, but not sure if that info is even out there.

    • @kira-py8gt
      @kira-py8gt 4 года назад +4

      same exact thing for me i just decided recently i want to use both she and they but i’m nervous that i’m wrong and just confused

    • @kaikatattack
      @kaikatattack 4 года назад +1

      @@kira-py8gt I think its good to try things out (:

    • @stoopidcrumpet6679
      @stoopidcrumpet6679 4 года назад +3

      You are definitely valid :) I think you should look up the term “demigirl”. It’s means someone that uses both she and they pronouns

    • @alexandralignell5424
      @alexandralignell5424 4 года назад

      Some people go by she/her and they/them pronouns, you could look into demigirl and demigender maybe? I can’t say what’s right for you but no matter what you find out in the end you are valid, every sexuality and gender identity is valid💖💖

  • @oliviamurray3909
    @oliviamurray3909 3 года назад +49

    My school: boys and girls do pe different
    My non-binary friend: *panik*

    • @itsyaboichilde5397
      @itsyaboichilde5397 3 года назад

      Just don’t do pe since apparently nb ppl don’t do sports lmao

    • @myles6580
      @myles6580 3 года назад +1

      @@itsyaboichilde5397 In many schools gym is mandatory :(

  • @pandapie9357
    @pandapie9357 3 года назад +6

    I know that I’m not non-binary myself, but I love that the school social worker changed the old teacher bathroom to a gender neutral bathroom, and now she’s my favorite person out of the whole school.

  • @iidahumisto3237
    @iidahumisto3237 4 года назад +7

    I have just started testing out if i might be nonbinary week ago and been watching allkinds of nonbinary videos to learn more and help me maybe find what i am. Loved this. Made me think alot of old stuff like how happy i also got younger when someone misgendered me as a male....

  • @Eluminatez
    @Eluminatez 4 года назад +14

    I'm starting to think that I'm Nonbinary, I've found myself relating to all of the points you've made in this video. (Especially during the part where you talked about the bathroom situations & feeling out of place with the girls and the guys and being in the middle.) Thank you for this! :)

  • @shametheshane4209
    @shametheshane4209 3 года назад +17

    I'm 30 and from a small town in indiana. I've been struggling with this since I can remember. Thanks for the advice, yo. For real.

  • @tenmacore-P
    @tenmacore-P 3 года назад +28

    Thanks for letting me know im non-binary
    **Moonwalks back into**
    **✨The closet✨**

  • @bobthenob5453
    @bobthenob5453 3 года назад +26

    P.E Teacher:So,Boys on this side,And you girls, on this side-
    Me:Ofc...i guess i"ll just sit on the bench like a 60 y/o having back pains-

  • @Sunny_Simp
    @Sunny_Simp 4 года назад +36

    I feel uncomfortable when I get called girl, and I don't want to be a boy but I don't know if I'm non binary

    • @itsyaboichilde5397
      @itsyaboichilde5397 3 года назад +5

      Even if you’re not sure yet you can still call yourself nb now and try to figure it out slowly, as long as you’re comfortable with smth

    • @cliche1431
      @cliche1431 3 года назад +1

      Just go with what’s comfortable right now. If one day you feel nb, try it. If one day you feel male or female, try it. If you have friends/family that are okay with that type of thing you can ask them to try name/pronouns, if not I recommend a website called gender dressing room. It lets you use the pronouns and name you’re trying in sentences and stories

    • @cataloupe3914
      @cataloupe3914 3 года назад

      *Hayloft by Mother Mother starts playing*

  • @opheliaedwards3020
    @opheliaedwards3020 4 года назад +114

    I love my name and when you hear my name you can tell it is "girly" but I want a name that is as unique as Ophelia what should I do

    • @opheliaedwards3020
      @opheliaedwards3020 4 года назад +8

      adesso.laurenzo thx yea recently I have thought of Oakley or Pheonix to keep it on the same track

    • @jamieisnotokay3298
      @jamieisnotokay3298 4 года назад +9

      I would say that you definitely don't have to change your name. If you don't like that's it's "girly" Then I would recommend looking at names and seeing if you like them. I still deciding on a name that makes me comfortable, but for me I just had names that I liked.

    • @Mosk314
      @Mosk314 4 года назад +1

      why would you care about your name, it's just a name...

    • @atlus5846
      @atlus5846 4 года назад +21

      Mosca Reus, some people using they/them pronouns, or any other non-binary pronouns just don’t feel comfortable being called a name that is leaning more specifically to one gender. Some people can immediately think “oh you’re a boy” or “you’re a girl” depending on your name. Some non-binary people just feel more comfortable being called a name that has no gender included so people won’t jump to conclusions.

    • @Mosk314
      @Mosk314 4 года назад +1

      @@atlus5846 Imagine caring about a pronoun

  • @__-gm7gg
    @__-gm7gg 3 года назад +7

    My mother said ‘be patient, girl.’ I wasn’t sure how to feel about that. I didn’t really like it, and now I’m having a gender identity crisis

  • @waterfire7229
    @waterfire7229 4 года назад +16

    Thanks for making this. I love how you say obscure for ze/zer. I find them easier as they sound closer to the typical she or he.

  • @cass1832
    @cass1832 4 года назад +11

    I'm very new to the LGBT community and don’t know much because I come from a Christian household. I finally labeled my sexuality as Pansexual, but I’m still mulling over my gender identity. I don’t really feel bad being called she/her, but when someone calls me he/him or they/them I just feel so good. I’m okay wearing feminine clothes, but I like wearing things like suits and masculine attire too.
    Thank you for making this video, although I haven't figured myself out completely this was a big help.
    Update: A few months ago I tried out all pronouns, and I’ve settled on just they/them and I identify as non-binary :)))

    • @orbseokie
      @orbseokie 3 года назад +1

      i cant say that i'm new to the lgbt community or dealt with religious conflicts, but i am also pansexual and confused about gender! its nice to know im not alone :)

  • @kenmakozume1872
    @kenmakozume1872 3 года назад +27

    I identify as NonBinary , the problems I've had was I was born a female, I actually hit puberty at a young age. Lately I have found interest in wearing makeup but because of the gender stereotypes forced into my mind it made me think over my identification. I have shortish hair but the one thing making me feel comfortable lately is baggy clothes that you wouldn't necessarily see on a girl because I'm lucky enough to only have older brothers. I don't really live in a supportive household especially when I said I find attraction to females and males, I do not know if I like others because I have not come in contact with one. Anyways the fact of who I was attracted to didnt fall well. I just wanted to get that out.

    • @orionliketheconstellation3003
      @orionliketheconstellation3003 3 года назад

      I relate to this a lot. i think i have gender dysphoria because ive always disliked having a feminine body and want to be more andro, but at the same time i like femme clothes and fasion. i know clothes dont have a gender, but it still makes me question and overthink myself.

    • @knitfastdiewarm4198
      @knitfastdiewarm4198 2 года назад

      Guys wear makeup too

    • @benjaminfranklin8412
      @benjaminfranklin8412 9 месяцев назад

      You are a woman.

  • @emisthem6562
    @emisthem6562 3 года назад +18

    I like Femme-leaning clothing styles like vintage stuff, but cutting my hair recently and considering a breast reduction once I've lost some weight really feels like ME
    I only came out as Bi last year, but I'm Demi, too so yay demis

  • @alizaeavery9138
    @alizaeavery9138 4 года назад +118

    me, a cis gender female: ahh yes this is for me

    • @kaikatattack
      @kaikatattack 4 года назад +14

      it could be

    • @alizaeavery9138
      @alizaeavery9138 4 года назад +15

      @@kaikatattack dont play with my feelings like thatttt

    • @kaikatattack
      @kaikatattack 4 года назад +7

      @@alizaeavery9138 haha good luck (:

    • @julesis-dead6751
      @julesis-dead6751 4 года назад +24

      Aye, we stan cisgender peeps educating themselves ✌️

    • @alizaeavery9138
      @alizaeavery9138 4 года назад +40

      @@julesis-dead6751 i watch things like this all the time to better understand non cis people. i have friends that dont identify as cis and watching things like this helps me help them

  • @drgabzini822
    @drgabzini822 4 года назад +11

    When I was a kid I had really, really long hair but only wore 'boys clothes' and if I ever met anyone new they would always be confused. I remember dodging the subject of my gender and feeling my heart sink if anyone told them I was a girl. I still love confusing people.

  • @h3mog0blin
    @h3mog0blin 4 года назад +20

    I used to wonder if I was genderfluid a couple years ago. I've never really felt like what society deemed as a girl. I had a very tomboyish personality growing up and didn't really fit in as a child. I've never really cared for particularly feminine clothes (skirts, bows, frills, etc) and usually wear more masc/ androgynous clothes. Yeah I liked some girly things but I felt off somehow. Everything about me from my personality to the things I liked just didn't feel like a girl. As I got older and learned about the lgbt+ community, it made me question if I even _was_ a girl. But the thing is, I don't really experience body dysphoria. My body is mostly fully developed now but I don't have a problem with it. (Although I don't have very large hips or bust so do with that what you will) Yeah, I prefer more masculine clothing but I still like to accentuate my feminine figure. So it made me wonder even more. If I don't experience dysphoria, am I even nonbinary or am I giving into the harmful stigma that girls are supposed to act and think a certain way? I've since come to the conclusion that, yes, I am female but every now and then I'll still wonder if I'm nonbinary. Can anyone else relate too or am I alone in this?

    • @krista6781
      @krista6781 4 года назад +2

      Yes same here!!

    • @itsrembaby2058
      @itsrembaby2058 4 года назад +1

      ne too

    • @PastelFire99
      @PastelFire99 4 года назад +1

      I feel the same way, but I’m still a minor

    • @krista6781
      @krista6781 4 года назад +3

      PastelFire 99 Me too, I’m 16. I’ve had a couple of friends call me by they/them pronouns for the past couple of months and I learned that it feels better, and she/her feels very “off”. Sometimes I feel like I’m faking being non-binary but I don’t reallt want to go back to identifying as a woman. I dont know, gender isn’t just a one day thing. It can feel strong on some days, and not so strong on others. All we have to do now is to be patient and it’ll take time to truly know ourselves. I wish you all luck on your discovery adventures!

    • @melon-dr6nd
      @melon-dr6nd 4 года назад +4

      don’t worry this is me!!! it’s not that i hate being female and personally, it’s more that i would be such a good man. idk if that makes sense, but like my interests and personality, and the way i sit - like it’s all manly. I would say i am a woman however, but if i could choose (before i was born) maybe i would have picked man? but it’s not like i want to change right now because woman doesn’t exactly feel wrong, it’s just that i would have been a rlly great dude. idk not exactly the same issue as you, but i definitely relate to several things there

  • @nicolasaguilar976
    @nicolasaguilar976 2 года назад +5

    I remember watching this video last year, questioning my gender and crying over the confusion. Your videos helped me a lot. A year has passed and turns out I'm a demiboy/transmasc. This video helped me learn I'm not cis

  • @kayla9953
    @kayla9953 4 года назад +13

    I thought I was a boy up until I was 7. I was in girl scouts when I was like 9 and I felt so out of place.
    I feel more masculine than anything. But like I’m still trying to figure out if I’m non binary or masc-trans.
    I cut my hair short like shaved my head. I was at the store with my boyfriend and the man was like “excuse me gentlemen.” And I got so excited.

  • @child.of.turmoil
    @child.of.turmoil 4 года назад +6

    I identify as non binary. I felt uncomfortable in my own body for most of my life. I struggled with my sexuality, I was asexual for two years and bisexual till now. I’ve realised that I might identify as non binary when I stopped having my period half a year ago due to some health issues I have. And now when I’m living over a half year without having to deal with that, I’ve finally accepted it and realised to just simply go with how I truly feel. I’ve cut my hair short, tried out some style of clothing that I would feel comfortable in and I feel some kind of relief. The only thing that I’m terrified of is the fact that my period might come back. I always hated my period since I had always some kind of issues with it and I really don’t want it to come back. I am actually thinking of getting a surgery so I don’t ever get pregnant or have to deal with menstruation again. I’m twenty now and I’ve decided that I don’t want to give birth and if I decide that I want to have children I want to adopt one, since I myself am adopted. I still am struggling with what I’m gonna do, so if any of you have some tips, encouragement or ideas, please feel free to comment.

  • @bulbasaur7979
    @bulbasaur7979 4 года назад +46

    (This is stupid account I made years ago because I don’t wanna put this on my RUclips channels account) welp, I’m still confuselled. I think I’m non-binary but don’t know. I’ve always said I was male but I have on multiple occasions been mistaken for a female and have several other woman like features. Help me!!!!

  • @goob-cr6yq
    @goob-cr6yq 4 месяца назад +1

    I grew up in a very closed minded, strict christian home so I still get confused and insecure about my own identity. People like you and the content you make really helps me identify and solidify who I am and how I express myself. Thank you!

  • @dailydoseofserotonin5901
    @dailydoseofserotonin5901 4 года назад +23

    I’m really tryna figure out if I’m non-binary....
    Like don’t really like some feminine and on the other hand I don’t like some masculine clothing. I usually wear uni-sex clothing.
    I’ve always want short hair, but it just doesn’t suit me! I’m not fully comfortable with my body (biologically I am female), I wouldn’t be comfortable in the other gender body either :/

  • @natashaivanova7360
    @natashaivanova7360 4 года назад +20

    Anything in the gender fluid category is hell to figure out 😞 (gender fae here)

  • @valy993
    @valy993 3 года назад +3

    I'm a girl at birth, I suffer from OCD but only the thought of being called "man" or "he/him" makes me feel so much pain and being called girl or woman makes me feel Happy. So thank you so much, I'm CIS as Always thought (the bully ocd wants to make me feel the opposite Way)

  • @sarahglashan3918
    @sarahglashan3918 3 года назад +31

    I need some advice, so I've been thinking I might be non binary for a while now. I'm biologically female and use she/her pronouns right now. 3 things that made me question this is recently I started to hate how I looked with long hair so much that I got my mom to cut it short one day and I feel alot more comfortable with it like this, the second thing is when people say "you're a pretty young woman" or "that's not very ladylike". I dont want to be lumped in with females, but at the same time I have no problem with my given name. My pronouns however I've been thinking of going by she/they, because using they/them exclusively just didnt feel right to me but neither does she/her. And the third thing is my breasts. My breasts are naturally quite large, so if I'm wearing something like a tshirt it's easy to see I'm a female. So alot of the time I wear baggy hoodies, I really want to get a binder to try that out but I'm scared of my parents finding out because idk if they'll accept me. Does anyone who is non binary or if you have knowledge on the subject please help me out? 😅

    • @alexgreen8651
      @alexgreen8651 3 года назад +2

      I feel the same way. I feel non-binary but I still like my birth name and idk if that happens for a lot of people? But a thing that helped me is what are the pronouns you refer to yourself in your head while questioning your gender? Could be a weird indicator idk but it helped me :) also ur probly past this as this comment was 9 months ago but aanyways

    • @I_GET_NO_SL33P
      @I_GET_NO_SL33P 2 года назад

      You're probably a demigirl

  • @Jaspet_oldaccount
    @Jaspet_oldaccount 4 года назад +6

    This is one of *the* most validating things I've seen in my life. I feel almost *exactly* like this, thank you so much for helping people by making these.

  • @zaynubcajee6534
    @zaynubcajee6534 4 года назад +25

    Thanks for the advice , I'm sure this will help so many people :) knowledge is power!

  • @Lowertownfan
    @Lowertownfan 4 года назад +45

    "I'm growing a chest and now I'm not sure I feel like "I have a chest .... my mother says I'm growing tall and going to me a wonderful *woman* and I felt so uncomfortable...
    Im not sure whenever I saw my chest I told myself that i was a girl though my mind said "you dont identify as either your body does not define you" and I try to cover it up but I am pansexual and yeah I mostly like girls too!"

  • @zone.out-8259
    @zone.out-8259 3 года назад +40

    I think of myself as gender fluid because the thought of being a girl is ok, but I don’t specifically feel like my brain is a girl. If someone called me a boy I would be happy even though I don’t feel like my brain is a boy either. Yet I don’t feel like non binary either, because I still feel like more of a girl then a boy. But I feel more masculine then feminine sometimes (and the opposite way around too) I still don’t know tho-

    • @ΜαρίναΞυπολιά
      @ΜαρίναΞυπολιά 3 года назад +5

      I feel not comfortable with he/him
      And actually I despise that pronoun used for me-
      But I slowly don't feel comfortable with she/her either
      I don't feel anything about she/they and they/them kinda don't fit in...
      I feel like I MUST be a girl but I also feel like I shouldn't and I also feel like I am too "feminine" for non-binary and like I'm faking it.
      I am a wrecking mess...

    • @Grace-ce2px
      @Grace-ce2px 3 года назад

      @@ΜαρίναΞυπολιά actually tho same it’s a problem haha…

    • @ΜαρίναΞυπολιά
      @ΜαρίναΞυπολιά 3 года назад +2

      @@Grace-ce2px ikrr I have made some progress and I'm currently identifying as a non-binary with pronouns she/her,they/them (it's both of them that I feel most comfortable with rn, and currently I identify as they/them) and I feel like that but let's just say I'm still a wrecking mess

    • @dressedinwhite3673
      @dressedinwhite3673 3 года назад

      Can absolutely relate 😅

    • @wolfiethehedgehog3900
      @wolfiethehedgehog3900 2 года назад

      This is similar to how I feel! Glad I'm not alone!! =)

  • @ashleykraan4240
    @ashleykraan4240 4 года назад +7

    Thank you for sharing. My 13 year old has been non binary for years but just this year has “come out” as non binary so I’m trying to learn as much as I can to be as supportive as I can to my child

  • @robynjones8524
    @robynjones8524 4 года назад +26

    i love this so much! as a baby enby (maybe?) this is so helpful. i love all your content

  • @georgiam.3957
    @georgiam.3957 4 года назад +6

    I was always so afraid to unedify as non-binary and i still am since i haven't came out yet but this video made me realize that indeed there's something that describes me . I've been out as pansexual for a long time but I think i used to have internalised homophobia fot being non-binary , I'm still trying to figure it out ... Thank you for making this video

  • @mxie383
    @mxie383 3 года назад +1

    is it weird that i got so excited watching this video? it’s like i’m finally starting to figure out/understand myself again. thank you so much!

  • @icchasaki
    @icchasaki 4 года назад +18

    I was at a park once (I'm non-binary, but born female) and I was drawing. Some kid looked at me and said "what are you doing?"
    Their mom goes "oh, he's drawing."
    It took a second for it to register, and then it made my day. 😊

  • @ajkies4609
    @ajkies4609 4 года назад +13

    Thankyou for making this video! I’m a little worried amount trying new names but I’ve been using they/them pronouns when talking to myself about myself (weird. But I’m my closest friend over quarantine). I’ve kinda been confused about gender for a while n was confused about who I was until recently. I saw a lot of my feelings in how you explained it. Thankyou so much for making this!

  • @sealsrus3714
    @sealsrus3714 4 года назад +7

    Thank you so much! I was questioning if I was trans or non binary, you are so helpful :D I’m non binary now (I use he/him they/them pronouns) and a lot of people ask me if I am a boy or a girl but usually my mother is around so I tell him/her/them I’m a girl, it makes me really happy when people ask me my gender

  • @JuliaBambooliaASMR
    @JuliaBambooliaASMR 2 месяца назад +1

    1:00 one thing I wanna add is that some folks' nonbinary expression isn't even "in the middle" of men and women. For those who wanna look more into gender as a wide and broad concept rather than a spectrum on a line, check out the gender cube!

  • @nenestar
    @nenestar 4 года назад +54

    I'm scared if ill come out as nonbinary my girlfriend will broke up with me (shes lesbian)
    Edit : I cant watch this video because my grandpas are in the room... oopsie
    Edit 2 : I dont know if I'm genderfluid or nonbinary since I cam out to my mother as genderfluid.. and theres some part of me that says that I'm not example. :
    ●I wouldn't cut my hair shorter than it already is (it's up from my shoulders)
    ●I even questioned myself as trans long ago*
    ●Im scared people will think im too young to understand those things (im close to 13 but I did a lot of research on those type of things)
    ●Im scared that my classmates are gonna start bullying me again
    ●I never really felt uncomfortable when I would enter the girls bathroom
    ●I'm going to therapy next week and its gonna be so awkward...
    Now , theres some things that make me feel like I'm nonbinary :
    ●I honestly hate my body as a girl
    ●It felt amazing when the lady from our nearest shop asked if I was a boy or a girl (honestly)
    ●I hate when people always refer to me as "she" or "her" (my friend thinks I'm trans and she refers to me as a "he" and calls me "Noah" . It felt pretty good whenever she would call me that tho..)
    ●I dont know what is going on with my gender , I switched from gender fluid to trans to nonbinary and honestly I just want to find answers
    Please dont consider me too young.. I'm questioning myself at this age because it just doesnt feel right being me

    • @saamahmed7435
      @saamahmed7435 4 года назад +14

      I honestly dont think your girlfriend will mind if you’re questioning your gender or identify as nonbinary now. I think they would support you and stuff since they care about you. Fr you should go for it :) 😋 Also you dont need to prove to anyone that your nonbinary, if you just feel out of place as a girl then you are nonbinary 😤 plus gender isn’t necessarily a fixed thing, it changes sometimes 🤷

    • @jamieisnotokay3298
      @jamieisnotokay3298 4 года назад +12

      I feel the same way. When I first went through puberty.. I was uncomfortable sometimes, but I just wrote it off as me not liking my body because I don't wanna be a boy. But now.. I just hate my femine body and I'm uncomfortable being called a girl. I wish someone could just tell me if I'm non binary or not. I feel like I'm faking it.. Like I'm not valid and I can't experiment because then I'm just seeking attention.

    • @nenestar
      @nenestar 4 года назад +2

      @@jamieisnotokay3298 I feel exactly the same! I even think that im faking my social anxiety tho its diagnosed by a doctor.. or my lesbian side , i feel like I'm faking that too even tho I know for a reason that I dont...

    • @xbduf4gb
      @xbduf4gb 4 года назад +2

      You’re just a lesbian being influenced by propaganda.

    • @Brave_Aviator
      @Brave_Aviator 4 года назад

      I feel the exact same way lol!

  • @SPECIALNINJACASSA
    @SPECIALNINJACASSA 4 года назад +20

    Another great video, I can imagine that the advice given could really help someone out when trying to figure out their gender identity 💚

  • @snailofkale
    @snailofkale 4 года назад +37

    I thought they said “some people use Caesar” and I perked up and went “salad?”
    Edit: when I first wrote this comment, a man sobbing over a cross-shaped stone, allowing himself a pained wail, “SHIIIZAAAAAA!”, meant nothing to me. My life has spiraled out of control.

  • @user-pg1gr6vw1d
    @user-pg1gr6vw1d 4 года назад +1

    Yeah once I was at a restaurant when I was 11 or 12 and the waiter called me “buddy” like he did for my brother and not “sweetie” like my sister AND I ALMOST CRIED. That was one of the huge turning points for me! My journey is still going and I’m still closeted but personally I am waiting until I’m out of the house till I come out since my parents are... well.. you know homophobic and transphobic haha. To anybody struggling, don’t worry at all. You will get there. You are amazing and I’m here for you.