U.S. Agencies Can’t Agree on Covid Origin | DJ Donald’s Favorite Tunes | Elf Sighting in Mexico
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- Опубликовано: 26 фев 2023
- The Department of Energy says Covid leaked from a Chinese lab, but other government agencies disagree. Elsewhere, America’s former president is enjoying his role as house DJ at Mar-a-Lago, and Mexico’s current president says mystical elves live among us. #Colbert #Comedy #Monologue
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Развлечения
Playing all the hits from, "Find me 11,780 Votes ..." to "Bing Bing Bong Bong Bing Bing.." And who could forget his #1 Hit...Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV.
'Horseface'
- Orange Don
You forgot the tracks that got him to chart in the first place: "Grab 'Em By the Pusspuss"
Who could forget his other hit 'I'm leaving on a jet plane with loo paper trailing behind and I'm out of my tiny mind' Top ten!
Whose boat is this boat?
His hit (How do I close my) Umbrella haunts me to this day.
Aretha Franklin was born in March 1942, Joe Biden was born in November 1942. Regardless of the release date, any of her songs are 'of her generation' and therefore technically also 'songs of his generation'.
Calypso facto.
QED
And Aretha, like Biden, couldn't get any respect either.
Upvoted for "calypso facto" which I am now stealing
Yes, he probably followed her career since they were both young.
Which actually makes Biden too old to be a boomer.
'Murder on the Orient Express an instructional video'...spot on!
I live in Wayne County Mi and when I heard they were bringing the toxic waste here from the train wreck I was speechless. We do not want it here. Send it to those rich owners area. They said it’s harmless so give it to them.
For real! Dump it on NS CEO's lawn.
No we don't!! Do you know where in MI they were supposed to take it?
I wouldn't be surprised if they dumped it into Lake Michigan, that's how malignant they are.
@@libertas5005 And why not? The fine has to be cheaper than dealing with the polluted soils properly...
How about sending it to red states!
California's new State Motto: A Song of Ice and Fire
And earthquakes we sleep through
All you need is the lightening bolts and 88 tattooed on your neck and your colors will be complete. 😅🤣
9:41 As a Spanish speaker congratulations on putting the inverted exclamation marks. Many English speakers forget them.
Remember that one time Colbert vehemently defended the wet market theory?
Yup just another conspiracy theory lmao
Turns out he's the one with the tin foil hat.
the CEO of Norfolk Southern, the company the owns the train, said "i don't know" also when asked where the waste would be taken. YOU'RE THE CEO!! he also said "i'd have drun'ken that water." i think he may be a decoy.
I’m from Mexico and can indeed confirm elves south of the US border look like Marjorie Taylor Greene. 🤭
Do they have the bark skin?
@@SmolFrogge oh she barks alright.
And our witches look like owls for some reason.
MTG is just Elon Musk in drag. 💃
there MUST be some nice duendes
Texas already has toxic waste. Ted Cruz
True. And Abbott . We don't need any more!!!
Take the toxic waste to the CEO’s property for disposal! Most appropriate place!
DJ Don can spin records for his inmates in Rickers Island prison.
There are no rules or laws governing Large Corporations. That ship sailed many years ago when they purchased our Politicians.
Yep! Thank you, Reagan😠.
@@rosalie4797 True story.
@@rosalie4797 You blame Reagan but what was stopping successive administration from reversing course?
@@user-yy1rs3df3q We blame Reagan for a lot. He sucked.
The name of the agency that won't say it's name.... No Such Agency...AKA..NSA.
Yep! Very likely... Medium probability! 💋💖😆😆😆
It's amazing that ideological hatred can blind a person to such a degree that they can't ascertain the truth while it's staring them in their face.
Like the lab leak?
"After Monday & Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF" -- Maxine 🤣🤣🤣
Man, I have to get up for work at 5 am and I'm here watching Stephen Colbert at 12:20 Am -_-
But he's worth it🤣
Did you get the t-shirt?
I watch him in the am great way to start my day
@@Massmommamess Libtard
@@tomjohnson3976 namecaller, that's all you got isn't it 😆
4:13 I am absolutely shocked that Texas was officially upset at receiving toxic waste. And 2013, a fertilizer plant exploded, killed 15 people, was located next to some schools, and destroyed the town. People started asking if fertilizer plants were storing chemicals in their neighborhoods, so of course Texas attorney general Greg Abbott made it illegal to give that information to the public. He soon after went on to become governor.
the devastation of beirut was caused by improperly stored fertilizer.
And the idiotic sheeple voted him in… AGAIN
Ahhh yes the cycle of a politician. I’m not entirely sure but I think after that federal regulations were made regulating fertilizer plants proximity to towns cities etc.
The stuff Texas got from the derailment is probably much safer than all the chemical crap it produces in the Corpus Christi area.
@@cyndis3942 terrorist lies. bierut wast targetted by russian seperatists who wanted to push russian nationalist's agenda. but go off with your lies.
To be fair, Biden was 43 when Aretha sang that song. That's a perfectly normal age group to fully appreciate Aretha. Generational music isn't just what you listened to as a teenager. Plus, it's almost 40 years ago, so it still counts as what he listened to as a 'young man' for someone that's 80.
more to the point, he is born in the same year as Aretha. she is from his generation.
Thanks for your wise knowledge of what is acceptable in your world
IMAGINE HOW STRONG OUR COUNTRY WOULD BE IF CONGRESS SPENT THEIR DAYS WORKING FOR THE PEOPLE WHO ELECTED THEM INSTEAD OF THE PEOPLE WHO BUY THEM.
but in a way the self-serving trust fund lobbies that GOT them elected ARE the ppl who elected them, they just did it by TRICKING YOU. so in a weird way CONGRESS is doing EXACTLY what you want. Problem reframed and solved. You are welcome!
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
WHY ARE YOU YELLING!? Maybe it's because you're angry about what an obvious truth this should be to everyone? Yet nothing changes and we keep running this Country on the whims and wants of giant companies. And everyday people keep supporting politicians making horrible decisions that favor said companies, because they've been mislead into believing it's somehow good for them?
Or was Capslock just on accidently?
STOP YELLING
Then they wouldn't get elected though 😅
Biden can't remember what Zoom is called but he can remember an obscure Aretha song from the 80s. I'm fine with that.
Long term memory! I’m 65 and probably wouldn’t have come up with zoom either…🤦🏻♀️😬
@@peggycamp9503 I've never even used Zoom lol
Joe is the president?
That's classic Alzheimer's...no short term memory
He is OK
I'm waiting for the CDC report on why Texas has a blackout every time it gets a little chilly out.
I get it.
Meh.
It happened one time dummy and effected about 15% of the state.
@@burtmcgurt3577 that's cute that you think we'll believe that.
3.6 million homes out of power out of 11.11 million is about twice what you claim.
and the same thing has happened about every decade.
You should probably learn that the DOE operates and oversees all national laboratories and nuclear facilities.
Let me tell you that the Aluxe or elf is very real. We mexicans stand by it. ❤❤❤❤
Todos los mexicanos? No lo creo. La leyenda de los Aluxes, de origen maya, seres que se convertían en piedra cuando les daba el sol, es eso, una leyenda. Además la foto que publicó amlo es vieja y era para ejemplificar la aparición de brujas en Nuevo León. Lejecitos de la península de Yucatán.
@@billbill2236 esa foto es de uno de los ingenieros que trabajan en el proyecto del tren maya obvi que hay mas fotos de aluxes, hasta en la lucha libre 🥰🥰🥰🥰
California singing Beastie Boys in the snow like "I got Dust and I got DUSTED!"
The elf was last seen with an inner tube and a bed roll headed north. 🌵🤠🌵
"Speaking of deadly leaks, remember all that toxic sludge--" 4:02
Stephen opening a story on Donny? No, wait... it's Ohio.
or Rudi Giuliani farting in court
I would've guessed the entirety of the GOP, but similar story, I guess. (I mean, jeez, Cheney's the last principled member and she's STILL an anti-woman bigot - a blood-traitor.)
The nickname of the National Security Agency at least used to be "No Such Agency".
NSA
Mexico has become less dependent on the US. Almo, with the help of Trump, ended the Merida initiative, and Fast & Furious ...less money for US weapons makers. Amlo undid Hillary/Obama/Blackrock privatization of Mexico's energy. ...Mexico is making changes to how elections are ran, not allowing the US to influence their elections. ...so USA is ramping up stories like this . Amlo got help from Russia ...RU helped prevent the US from corrupting the elections Amlo won 4 years ago. Mexico hasn't had a real president in decades.
When a man that is Stephen’s age tries to be appealing to people half his age, what do you really think is going on?
@@seadonkey6913Seriously? The man is Great at his job.
@@Dragoness-si2xr you easily fooled😱
I think the village people is the only band that will let him use one of their songs
The four levels of confidence:
1. Nah
2. Possible
3. Probably
4. Betcherass
💖😁
Now put that in a report a politician can understand.
5. OH LORD IT'S COMIN'
Murder on the Orient Express and Gregorian chant jokes 💯
Apparently the Elf on a shelf moonlights as a Skinwalker in the off season?
4:40 "everybody in, Marko"
I literally spit my coffee. That's funny 😁
@7:41
Lolz
"Keebler Cookies! Demon Flavor!" 😂🤣
And yes, in Mexican lore, Elves can either be good or bad. 🧐👉📖
So he's not a DJ. He's a... Qrator.
That's.... actually... genius. Take your thumbs up.
Lmao that is sooo good 😂 Enjoy your imminent RUclips fame!
that’s gonna stick for sure 😂😂😂😂
A crater you say?
Nicely done.
In his desperate attempt to prove how right he was, he forgot one thing…
…that he is supposed to be funny.
6:20 ‘Gregorian chant, Dies Irae, Dona Nobis Pacem…’ = one of the many reasons why I will always love Colbert. He met his wife at Philip Glass production. The guy knows his music.
I do wish the show would have that kind of music on as well as the most popular stuff. a chance to introduce people to ‘classical’ music (wish there were a better term, seems so stodgy and it isn’t) as well. It’s incredible music
Care to inform us less knowledgeable in the world of fine music? I can't say I know any of those, and only a bit of googling and reading would tell me why this is funny, at which point I'll have forgotten what I was supposed to be researching to begin with.
@@kindlin happy to oblige. Gregorian Chant is one of the best known early examples of ancient Western notated music. it’s often referred to as plainchant where everyone sings in unison (in the church), a kind of singing that was developed during the 5th through the 9th centuries. If you were to google ‘Gregorian chant images’ you would see that the notes don’t yet have rhythmic values assigned to them, no time signatures, just black dots representing the notes and shapes. People knew what to do back then.
so it’s an ageist joke :) told through nerdy music history. The rest of the terms also refer to ancient music. Dies irae is a motive (a group of notes in a certain order) used in music to signify death. It’s a beautiful motive and comes back in many pieces throughout the centuries.
I’m simplifying all of this, of course. historians have written reams of material about these things.
Stephen could’ve won even more points if he had added Guido of Arezzo (c.1000) to his list. I think he was the first to name the notes ABCD etc. but he did good :)
@@alumpyhorse Ahh, got it, ty.
So... how long before Tucker rants about Mexican Elves coming to steal our Mall Santa assistant jobs?
They have do something to fill that yawning void of "we're not talking about how we're being sued and our documented lies are public"
It's in the works
He has to edit the J6 videos first.
Fox News- they cover the stories the Liberal Left is afraid to show!
Watch tonight at 7pm when Laura Ingraham shines the light on the Caravan of Mexican Elves Headed for US Southern Border!
Fun facts : the swine flu was from Mexico.
The standard joke is ,"California does TOO have four seasons." Those 4 seasons are
1. Fog
2. Fire
3. Flood
4. Earthquake
Johnny Carson ,carnac the magnificent had the best... on a clear day....
UCLA
I would make number 4 to be “fault line ruptures”, just for the alliteration.
Due to climate change Flood is now Addittional Fire
The joke in California is the government. I drove down the 5 last year and to my right were hillsides covered in dead orchards -- rows and rows of dead trees, upside down on the hillside -- and to my left was an aqueduct full of irrigation water headed for the ocean.
Combine self running generators and power walls in homes and businesses for seemingly endless clean energy everywhere all the time. We already have the answers to our issues. We just need leaders and officials that will actually use it correctly.
A US agency that cannot be named said… nothing?
Wouldn’t that be happening all the time?? 😂
A family member has a relative who is retired from NSA. So, the family joke was that NSA (national security agency) stands for no such agency.
@@tracycraft is that relative you?? bc that would be the cherry on top of the most NSA statement ever.
@@shwnshts9469 no. 8 have never worked for the government.
Hey, Gregorian Chants are wonderful!
And this is when Steven got us into war with Mexico lolz
As a Mexican I unfortunately agree with everything he says
I think we already had a war with Mexico. Isn't there some rule about double dipping???🤔
AMLO so desparate to get attention away from Sunday's massive protests. And I am learnig about his "elf" through Stephen Colbert. 😂😂😂
Not at all, AMLO is indoctrinating his followers, who believe everything he says. He is a dictator, who wants to replicate Cuba in Mexico. But the majority of Mexicans are not going to allow it.
@@clave26 massive? 😂 did you see his (Obrador’s) massive protest weeks ago? We were at least 4 times more than what the opposition had this Sunday. Facts!
being from Mexico... The Elf thing cracked me up.
Un chiste del presidente de México, mal entendido, que ahora lo hacen ver como otra cosa.
México con sus aluxes
E. E. U. U. con sus ufo’s y área 51 (?)
@@COCOBLONDELLA se burlan de lo que desconocen por completo
Los gringos se burlan de todo, y luego creen en la existencia de ovnis 😂
@@COCOBLONDELLA Pues quien no se va a reir, eso de la foto no es un aluxe, sino un gibón de Indonesia, un mono arborícola nocturno. Yo que vivo en la Riviera Maya, no he visto, pero sí cuando los chamanes hacen las ceremonias para pedir permiso, he visto cómo los empujan, hasta casi tirarlos, porque van indicandole al mismo, que árboles sí y cuáles no derribar para iniciar una construcción. Aquí la verdad son muy respetados por eso. Por cierto, un UFO es todo aquel objeto no identificado (van desde aviones en vuelos ilegales hasta globos aerostáticos y cohetes).
My sister gave me a coffee mug that reads "I wake every morning glad that DJ isn't president." I stored it in a cabinet, cuz I never want to think of him.
You never want to think of him? Well it doesn't seem like you're really succeeding at that right now.😉
It ain't gonna age well in 2024 lol.
I wonder if Mar-a-lago bought a recurring public performance license to play Y.M.C.A. and the other tunes that Agent Orange is tapping into his i-pad.
I think we all know the answer. Might be time for some mass law suits against the orange one - turning the tables on him & his suing games
I bet not. Should, but not.
Oh! Mar-a-Lago would be a great place to ship all of that toxic soil and water coming out of East Palestine Ohio!
So, by Trump's definition of DJ, anyone picking songs on a jukebox is a DJ. 😉😂🤣😂🤣
Most radio DJs have been using buttons and computers for decades now.
@@terri6854 didn’t realize he was a qualified radio DJ 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 - he looks so SAD…lol
Not many people know this....
@@c.guydubois8270 I think the problem is those kind of people like trump calling themselves DJs. Like how people hire a wedding 'DJ' lol. There are real ones out there still but people have hijacked the meaning of what a DJ is sadly.
I can cross off that item off my bucket list now. 😎
“I believe he passed his magic on to me” 😂😂😂
He probably did. All his work is out of this world! Absolutely superb!
@@erikcastillo2454 If you are neo con liberal that loves war and Covid mandates. Otherwise he's really not.
Holly SH*T!!!! as someone who has been studying the ACTUAL folklore, common fantasy races are baised on, I can confirm, indeed, that is an ACTUAL dark elf, from elfheim, as mentioned in folklore. Sure, unlike the usual elf sighting " the hat man" shadow person, it's garbed in a robe, so, it can ACTUALLY exist in the third dimension, but, that.... That's an ACTUAL elf!
: 0
To those of you who have ever used a jukebox, congratulations! You have passed the DJ course at Trump University! (Diplomas availability after full payment.)
Most radio DJs have been using buttons and computers for decades now.
Crypto currency is accepted.🤑
Jukeboxes sound soo much better..
😂😂😂❤
I hate Trump more than most. But honestly, a radio DJ picks the tunes. I listen to college radio all the time and they pick songs. They dont mix them or do anything creative. They just play the ones they like in the order they want. To frame this as some sort of gotcha moment is just giving Trump the attention he craves. Trump loves that we are talking about his lame DJ skills bc that means we are not talking about the real problems he causes.
I thought the on going joke that is George Santos was our greatest source of fun. 🙃😄
Santos died on a cross for All of us!
@Katie Hettinger "Santos" is also the reason some celebrate Arbor Day.. bc he "invented" everything around us & he rescued thousands of people from that devastating earthquake in Turkey & Syria.
@@AndiDuck who? I thought we were discussing Anthony Devalder.
@@jackderipper2233 sassy!
Santos died in a war for people like you!
Wow, TFG, our Orange Idjit, doesn't know what a DJ does? I'm just flabbergasted! Thanks for what you and your team so, Stephen.
❤️❤️
Jesus loves you he died on the cross for your sins. Believe in him and you will be saved and go to heaven!
lie constantly? 🤣
Isn't it weird that even in the 21st century when everyone has a high quality camera in their pocket or purse that ALL photos of strange, mystical things are blurry? Hmmm... 🤔🤣
TFG dances like he's doing a purp walk and really has to pee! What Melania ever saw in him is a mystery to me! Is money really that powerful?
Yes. To some people.
I think it's fair to say that if she knew she would end up being dragged into First Lady world and all of don's bullshit and cheating.......she would have hitched herself to a different sugar daddy.
Check book + Green Card + fast track Green Card for her parents. That's the mail-order bride trifecta!
@@philipsmashmouth8782bye boy, bye.
Yup! But not to me!
Drumpf doing a George Santos:
"I'm a DJ!"
Steven, clearly the unnamed department is "control" fighting "kaos" since the '50's
The elf story feels like a promo for the next season of Los Espookys
Is that an actual show?
Good idea, Los Espoockies are already scaring the living shit out of Eateban and his cartel bosses
Sing it with me, folks!
"It's fun to stay at the
Y N D A!
By singing along, you're all contractually entering into a legally binding
Y N D A-a..."
10/10 😂
Yeah, as a Californian I can confirm that our other weather option is fire but I'd also add smoke... a ton of smoke.
6:05 For reference: Gregorian chant originated during the 10th century (so it's literally over 1000 years old) and is written in the oldest recorded form of musical notation known to man. In a way it is the oldest recorded music in the world.
Hurrian hymn #6.
So that might've been Biden's actual generation of music👍
Honestly, I just love Biden. He’s adorable and at the same time ridiculously competent and knowledgeable.
Apart from when he speaks and tries to walk upstairs...
You want a pillow to go with that dream?
You mean incompetent -------right?
Wow, there actually exists someone more deluded than Rob Reiner.
You must know a side of him that we haven't witnessed. Did Joe sniff your hair?
Thank you sooo much Stephen. I don't think you could ever understand how your show pulls me out of the Maga quicksand of depression and frustration.
I need Stephen, Kimmel and Seth to keep sane-ish.
He pulled you out of the MAGA quicksand depression by subtly reminding you that your current president suffers from diminishing cognitive abilities.
@@JoshuaSmith99 its called appreciation, get a clue
@@vvohvaelez9277”get a clue” is so lame lmaooo
@@naomiarram5187 Amazing though, Biden still outperforms trump,
"I will admit it: you humans are keen.
You found I’m feeble against a vaccine.
But I have allies like Marjorie Greene.
"Nyaah, Nyaah!!” -Covid 19
HA!
That is SOOO lame. thumbs up! 👍
That's a keeper!
Nicely done, @Max Doubt
Deaths per 100 thousand gop v dem areas will tell you everything about viruses.
Come on Steven, you know there were still Teleri in Mirkwood and Silvan Elves in Lothlorien Middle Earth during the Fourth Age! If you keep making elementary mistakes like that, Peter's going to take you off his Christmas card list. :P
It would have been Silvan Elves in Mirkwood. The Teleri had split into multiple clans by that point, such as the Silvan, the Sindar, and the Green-elves (As long as we're doing Tolkien corrections, I thought I would join in. :P )
@@Pixis1 Bugger, you're right. The Teleri were the sailors off the coast of Valinor, weren't they? I thought I remembered Teleri meaning "unwilling" and was used to describe both the sailors and those who remained in Middle Earth.
@@gestaltdude The Teleri were the largest elf clan but they split into multiple smaller groups - the Sindar/Grey-elves, the Nandor/Silvan Elves, the Laiquendi/Green-elves, and the Falmari who went to Valinor (those are the sailors you were thinking of). The Avari were the ones who were called the Unwilling. They stayed in the east where the Elves first awoke.
There's a lot of elf clans in Tolkien's works so it definitely gets confusing.
You know where that toxic sludge should go? Norfolk Southern corporate executive office suites. Let ‘em store it under their chairs
The Department of Energy is headed by Rick perry, unless he was fired. 2:23 rick perry never had any business in the appointments he was given.
The current head of department of Energy is Jennifer M. Granholm. Your thinking of the Trump years
Rick Perry was told to GTFO right after the election.
The head of departments generally change with the party in charge.
Google is your friend. Stupidity appears to be your state of being. A modicum of research would help cure that. I'd suggest trying the Google next time before displaying your ignorance for all. Rick Perry hasn't been Energy Secretary since 2019. You're welcome.
Oh great, these things I've been hearing about the train industry does _not_ sit well in my gut.
My husband, son and myself (& Meatloaf the kitten) reside next to the tracks, as do 3-4 other households.. and they blow by like a bat out of hell.
Just remember me fondly, "fellow" humans. -Yob Tarley 👽 and my travel buddy CorRn'Holio👾
Oh damn, you just made me realize we don't live far from some tracks. Now we have to be afraid of trains too? 😫
Was that...two Meat Loaf references?
His signature song as a DJ: The high cost of low-flush tois.
4:45 audience response: Polo! priceless😂
6:20 ‘Gregorian chant, Dies Irae, Dona Nobis Pacem…’ = one of the many reasons why I will always love Colbert. He met his wife at Philip Glass production. The guy knows his music.
I do wish the show would have that kind of music on as well as the most popular stuff. a chance to introduce people to ‘classical’ music (wish there were a better term, seems so stodgy and it isn’t) as well. It’s incredible music
I initially heard about the Dept. of Energy announcing that the lab. leak was probable & wondered why it was commenting on a pathology issue. Now I'm wondering why the Dept. of Energy runs bio. labs.
I was wondering the exact same thing. 😄
(deep breath)
THEY DIDN'T SAY IT WAS 'PROBABLE'
Fuuuuuuuucking hell what is wrong with people (and by 'people' I obviously mean you but I'm pretending to be polite).
"with **LOW CONFIDENCE** "
Jeeeez-auce. 🤦🏻♂️
Example: I can conclude 'with low confidence' that you actually read their statement, seeing as you didn't understand/know what they said.
People who think that Covid 19 is caused by a man-made virus make Flat Earthers look intelligent.
I’ve watched a few different news programs cover the story, but none gave as much relevant details and context as this comedy program.
@@Tao_Tology I didn't read their statement; it was based on headlines & I suspect that most people won't get as far as "low confidence" or know what it means here. Fair criticism.
However, that still leaves the questions of why the Dept. Of Energy has anything to say on the subject or why it runs bio. Labs.
That elf photo reminds me of the old story of the chupacabra. If ya gotta know what I really think it is though, I'd say some sort of small mammal like a lemur or monkey is in your tree, senor presidente. (I can't spell or speak spanish, so sorry to any spanish speakers out there.)
It's propaganda for the train they want to build to save the southern jungle and Maya traditions. An Aluxe is like a mysthical creature but the right wing conservatives are making fun of the president and saying he's crazy cuz they want him out of office.
I think you're Absolutely Right!
Except lemurs are located in Madagascar, not Central America.
But those are clearly the eyes of a wild animal.
@@susansokoloski2233 Well, Mexico isn't in Central America either. It is in North America along with the United States and Canada.
@@teresalynnarmstrong5132 yes, the larger section of it is. The designation also is called "Mesoamerica" which includes both most of Mexico and other Central American countries. The point is, that lemurs exist on only one island in the entire world and nowhere in the Northern or Western hemispheres (unless one includes zoos or unfortunate privateownership/collections)...but the biggest point I made was agreement that these are clearly reflective wildlife eyes. Since the comment is about lemurs and monkeys, I used the ecological, geologic and anthropological/archaeological term of "Central" but I would have been more accurate using the term "Meso." You assumed I used the modern geopolitical term, which I did not.
"Low confidence " means it's basically zero/implausible/ or no evidence chance if they are asking "was it a lab leak"?
Gotta love a president with a sense of humor!
Well Biden basically is one big joke.
Betelgeuse Betelgeuse Beetle - Juice Agency.
Donnie is probably DJ'ing from his underground bunker.
I LOVE GREGORIAN CHANTS. In a moment of Peace is an epic sounding song to hear
Lol be pulled out Dies Irae. I haven't heard that since my music history class
Kudos to the writers
Concerning the toxic waste story, no one has mentioned where it was coming from, who sent it and who it was going to be delivered to. Maybe one of these three possibilities could play a role in its destination now?
Conway, Pennsylvania was the destination, a factory that makes pvc pipes.
Your followers are not at all welcoming in this era.
East Liverpool is as sensible as spent nuclear power rods stored in Toledo salt mines under Lake Erie on top of a fault. Radioactive steam plumes, anybody?
Absolutely
"Until Friday, Norfolk Southern “had been solely responsible for the disposal of waste generated by the East Palestine train derailment,” the department said, but waste disposal plans “will be subject to EPA review and approval moving forward.”" - CNN, February 26th, 2023.
Voldemort isn't a secret US agency... he is the Australian opposition leader
Maybe he’s just 1 of the horcruxes like Trump 😂
“You don’t see the Census Bureau building nukes.” No but the Department of Energy oversees nuclear power and I think weapons as well.
The Ohio toxic waste should be sent to that other toxic waste in Mar-a-Lago.
@6:26 either Stephen knows his gregorian chants OR he has donuts
That Keebler Elf illustration was incredible.
That was MTG looking for a place to pee in the dark while vacationing in Cancun with Ted Cruz!
Snow and fire actually go pretty well together, Stephen. Winter dries the wood. All it takes is a spark. Those snow bros might end up needing some surfer shades....
I love it when Stephen gets his Tolkien reference in. Luckily for me that happens at least a few times a week.
I bet he loved it more when he used to visit Epstein on his island😂
You just know Stephen is talkin' 'bout Benny when he says "come pet the dog it feels so cool." 🥴
The reason the national laboratories are under DOE started with the Manhattan Project, This was why the labs were initially built. They transferred to DOE after the war when Americans were smitten with the idea of a nuclear future. Now they do a lot of cutting edge research that is mostly unrelated to energy. It's an artifact of history.
Nuclear energy FTW!
Thank you for knowing a bit of this. The DOE actually kept this ability to follow outbreaks/research is because they wanted to follow human dna mutations after different nuclear uses. After Chernobyl they had enough new mutations that they started the human genome project.
Until China is completely honest with us, and even if they were, we probably still wouldn't trust them, we're never going to know where the Corona came from. DOE or not.
@@chrissyce5613 We didn't even map the Human Genome until 17 years after Chernobyl.
So it would have been rather strange to notice alterations in it 17 years before we realised what it was.
It's also unrelated to microbiology. And even if they have some researchers, working on mammalian genetics, viral genetic differ so greatly from that of living organisms, it just isn't applicable.
Gregorian chants! Classic!😂🤣😂
When he said "I'd like a plate of wet apps" I thought he said "I'd like a plate of wet a**" and I lost my ability to human 🤣I laughed so hard my soul left my body 🤣 oh my god! LMFAO 😂
Snow in LA? Damn, GTA Online leaked into real life.
I've become so cynical that I legit thought all that snow was a convoluted marketing ploy for Cocaine Bear. For like, way too long.
was ironic timing, lol
😅🤣
The balloons were a marketing ploy for Top Gun: Rooster
The CIA response "No, that wasn't us." Barely kept the coffee on the inside.
IT WAS A LAB LEAK, THEY KNOW IT, STOP LYING TO THE PUBLIC!!!!!
🤭😊😄😁😂🤣🤣🤣 Oh gosh! Who's zooming who??????? The tears will not stop...you are hilarious, Stephen!!!!
yes!!! highlight of my day --> gregorian chant major throwback for ancient sleepy joe lol
The best part of that joke is... no matter how old and goofy "Sleepy Joe" is? He looks like a young JFK slaying the political world compared to a sad, Willy Loman-style failed grifter has-been like Trump.
"I have seen something no one has seen before me, a new phenomenon.
But I already know how it is called!"
- Smart Humans
4:13 Send the toxic dirt where it belongs…Mar-A-Lago.
7:32 Has Stephen worked in a kitchen? That's 90% of head chefs... 😂
He was a server.
Great show! always keeps me laughing! Love from Ontario Canada 🇨🇦❤️🇨🇦
This Torontonian waves back. 🙋
Hey from Quebec 😁
Friendly Manitoba!
Mississauga says hello!
What is it about the program that is great?
what a world of incertaintly and confusion stay strong my friends
As a Mexican, this is the hardest I've laughed yet at a Stephen Colbert episode
As an American this dude is sad. All he talks about is Trump.. pretty boring
De veras? Mmmm y te dices mexicano..
Me too, my Presidente it's a "Mapache rabioso"
Wait... somebody laughed at Stephen colbert? Why would you admit that?
como por?