Finally get your family OUT OF YOU & be the true self you were never allowed to be 👇 Access my free training - jerrywise.ewebinar.com/webinar/free-training-10027 ‘Road to Self’ Program: Join 10,000+ people who have transformed their lives! www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/road-to-self
Thank you, Jerry and Yitz…this has been particularly helpful today. I have been feeling the need to “disappear” from all the parasitic relationships i have been part of….one day at a time…
Thank you. This reinforces what I have been endeavoring... and succeeding at. I have made it past the growling and bared fangs...the bristling fur no longer curtails me. I have my own growl and fangs and fur thank you very much, I will not be guilted or shamed.
"Acceptance is not the goal" Wow!! That's a great truth to remember! Thanks!! You bring us such great, healthy, truth!!! I'm in the middle of some self differentiation and receiving some cold shoulder responses on the family. But I cannot go back to how it was. I feel God freed me from a toxic immeshment with them. It is their choice to get the help they need or not.
You are very welcome. Sorry to hear about your family’s cold shoulder. You are right-we must deal with our enmeshment with them, and they must deal (0r not deal) with their enmeshment with us Thanks for watching
The scapegoat is the person who plays the role that and keeps the sick person sick so if you step out of that role and you don’t go along with what everybody else is doing to support that person, that’s when they start saying things like you don’t care you’ve got your own agenda.you have to be ok with their displease, tongue lashing, disappointment in you, etc especially if you step out of that role to do something for yourself like keeping your appointments instead of canceling because the sick person needs your attention.
Intentional Stepping out of that role is one of the most freeing and authentic items I have done. Yes, be ready as people are already talking about you no matter what in your personal and business life.🙃 Differentiate!!
It's such a wonderful and deep self coaching video experience for me, as well as all these videos series. "If I'm fearing that they won't accept me they probably didn't accept me up until now" - so true for me, well said Yitz, thanks for that 🙏 Figuring out trugh a self differentiation process for being in a false acceptance relationship for long time, it's very painful. but I'm grateful for the ability of getting self aware and aware of it. Especially for getting the awareness of my part in the system which enable the false acceptance kind of family relationship in my life.
Please join as a support member here on RUclips for only 1.99/month. This will help keep the free videos coming. They are time consuming to make and take many hours. Thanks for your support of this channel. I have a workshop coming up February 6, 2021 Saturday 1-5pm EST hosted on Zoom GETTING YOUR FAMILY OF ORIGIN OUT OF YOU, please sign up. www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/event-details/getting-your-family-of-origin-out-of-you-workshop
The “self-differentiation” process has already dealt with what you are talking about, by seeing when i first felt “shame” for not feeling “approved” of. So, i don’t need their “approval” to continue being the truthful version of who i am, what my true desires or affections in MY HEART are, AND what i truly RESPECT in myself and others, and what knowledge is most important for ME to study, know, or grow in the understanding of, in the future.
You are so welcome! Thank you for watching my videos. If you would like to donate to help produce more free videos, it would be greatly appreciated. Any amounts helps us produce great videos. www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/donations
Got triggered on Christmas Eve. Parent tried to call me out and wave the naughty finger for a text message ... getting chastised And I'll be 40 next month!!....when they were doing the same thing. I honestly was busy and didn't mean any disrespect plus it was a quick text. I said oh my intention was actually not disrespectful was yours? I was triggered though. I immediately referred to your channel and changed the topic as if nothing was said. It worked. ❤️🎄
AND, YOU CAN DO THIS!! You get better and better at figuring what it really is that the ‘little one” inside, needs YOU to help him/her with. And you learn to KNOW WHO YOU ARE, WHAT YOU BELIEVE, WHAT YOU PREFER, WHY YOU HESITATE AT TIMES TO MAKE A DECISION, AND MANY OTHER THINGS. That our overly-busy lives have not allowed us to know about our own selves. You really are “one of a kind”, unique in many ways, and AN INDIVIDUAL. And you come to feel much more at peace having many decisions you have made “under your belt” with you feelings of “personal competence” growing, as well as your understanding of what your own limits are, and who you are comfortable with, choosing better trusting relationships, and leaving “dying” or “flat” relationships behind. You are now more competent in making good choices, for good results and good consequences, and getting more ‘wisdom” about your own life, every day. Getting up in the morning is no longer a “dread’, but a looking forward to a “new day” of endless possibilities right in front of YOU.
Thank you for this Jerry! What a lightbulb moment. I have never read or heard of anyone explaining how to get the ''scapegoatism'' out of me. I've been searching for this for such a long time. I've watched the video and taken some notes as well! Btw, do you have a transcript of this video as I would like to go back later to refresh my memory of what was said in this video?. Reading a transcript is faster for me than watching the whole video again. Thanks!
Thank you for watching I'm sorry I don't have a transcript for this video There are apps you can get that can transcribe this video for you. Happy Holidays!
Kingdom of darkness / world system .. u get very little , takes everything in return . Kingdom of heaven / Lord Jesus Christ system .. u get everything, takes very little in return.
If i buy 3 differentiated books, that i, alone am interested in, why does that bother other people? I have ALWAYS had many different interests to read about and learn about. I am curious about different ideas in life, and i have no expectations of others in these interests. I, alone, want to learn. My “stance” has never changed. I have ALWAYS wanted to understand differences. What THEY think and Do, does not make me have think and do the same things. That sounds like “behavioral learning theory” modification. It’s like climbing a mountain all the way to the top, with more and more resistance on the way up. I am still a concerned American citizen, and a Protestant Christian, but i like learning new things. “If you find that you are continually annoyed at someone who refuses to change, you are refusing to change.” The GOAL is to fully be who I am. I am moving slowly away from “the Role”….more into ME. Growth usually happens in spurts.
Finally get your family OUT OF YOU & be the true self you were never allowed to be 👇
Access my free training - jerrywise.ewebinar.com/webinar/free-training-10027
‘Road to Self’ Program: Join 10,000+ people who have transformed their lives! www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/road-to-self
So freeing , ive always been so reactionary to my family , listening to Jerry allows my sence of self to grow , thanks Jerry .
Thank you, Jerry and Yitz…this has been particularly helpful today. I have been feeling the need to “disappear” from all the parasitic relationships i have been part of….one day at a time…
This is one of your best videos. Truly life changing stuff.
it’s like, I am Me, wether you like Me or not ❣️☺️
❤️❤️❤️always great info Jerry and Yitz!
Keep Calm and Differentiate On..!
We will!
Jerry Wise, you could sell a shirt with this saying on it!
Thank you. This reinforces what I have been endeavoring... and succeeding at. I have made it past the growling and bared fangs...the bristling fur no longer curtails me. I have my own growl and fangs and fur thank you very much, I will not be guilted or shamed.
Awesome 👍!
"Acceptance is not the goal" Wow!! That's a great truth to remember! Thanks!! You bring us such great, healthy, truth!!! I'm in the middle of some self
differentiation and receiving some cold shoulder responses on the family. But I cannot go back to how it was. I feel God freed me from a toxic immeshment with them. It is their choice to get the help they need or not.
You are very welcome.
Sorry to hear about your family’s cold shoulder.
You are right-we must deal with our enmeshment with them, and they must deal (0r not deal) with their enmeshment with us
Thanks for watching
Amazing series! Life changing!
The scapegoat is the person who plays the role that and keeps the sick person sick so if you step out of that role and you don’t go along with what everybody else is doing to support that person, that’s when they start saying things like you don’t care you’ve got your own agenda.you have to be ok with their displease, tongue lashing, disappointment in you, etc especially if you step out of that role to do something for yourself like keeping your appointments instead of canceling because the sick person needs your attention.
Intentional Stepping out of that role is one of the most freeing and authentic items I have done. Yes, be ready as people are already talking about you no matter what in your personal and business life.🙃 Differentiate!!
Dont look for change in your family , you will end up disappointed, look for change in yourself .
It's such a wonderful and deep self coaching video experience for me, as well as all these videos series.
"If I'm fearing that they won't accept me they probably didn't accept me up until now" - so true for me, well said Yitz, thanks for that 🙏
Figuring out trugh a self differentiation process for being in a false acceptance relationship for long time, it's very painful. but I'm grateful for the ability of getting self aware and aware of it. Especially for getting the awareness of my part in the system which enable the false acceptance kind of family relationship in my life.
Please join as a support member here on RUclips for only 1.99/month. This will help keep the free videos coming. They are time consuming to make and take many hours. Thanks for your support of this channel.
I have a workshop coming up February 6, 2021 Saturday 1-5pm EST hosted on Zoom GETTING YOUR FAMILY OF ORIGIN OUT OF YOU, please sign up. www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/event-details/getting-your-family-of-origin-out-of-you-workshop
The “self-differentiation” process has already dealt with what you are talking about, by seeing when i first felt “shame” for not feeling “approved” of. So, i don’t need their “approval” to continue being the truthful version of who i am, what my true desires or affections in MY HEART are, AND what i truly RESPECT in myself and others, and what knowledge is most important for ME to study, know, or grow in the understanding of, in the future.
Thank you so much
You're most welcome
Very helpful examples!This series gives a lot of hope for possible change!
Wonderful Danielle...I'm glad this series is a help.
Thank you both!! Keeping my foot nailed to the floor!! 😊
You are so welcome!
Thank you for watching my videos.
If you would like to donate to help produce more free videos, it would be greatly appreciated. Any amounts helps us produce great videos.
www.jerrywiserelationshipsystems.com/donations
Thank you ❤️ Jerry for creating this wonderful video ❤️ and giving me some tools to use to change my life ❤️.
You are so welcome
תודה רבה
אתם מוזמנים מאוד, תודה שצפיתם בסרטונים שלי.
@@jerrywise that's so nice of you dear Jerry for writing in Hebrew 🙂
Got triggered on Christmas Eve. Parent tried to call me out and wave the naughty finger for a text message ... getting chastised And I'll be 40 next month!!....when they were doing the same thing. I honestly was busy and didn't mean any disrespect plus it was a quick text. I said oh my intention was actually not disrespectful was yours? I was triggered though. I immediately referred to your channel and changed the topic as if nothing was said. It worked. ❤️🎄
I can't un-know what I have already learned. So, I am just going to have to be self-differentiated (even if they react). I have to live out my truth.
AND, YOU CAN DO THIS!! You get better and better at figuring what it really is that the ‘little one” inside, needs YOU to help him/her with. And you learn to KNOW WHO YOU ARE, WHAT YOU BELIEVE, WHAT YOU PREFER, WHY YOU HESITATE AT TIMES TO MAKE A DECISION, AND MANY OTHER THINGS. That our overly-busy lives have not allowed us to know about our own selves. You really are “one of a kind”, unique in many ways, and AN INDIVIDUAL. And you come to feel much more at peace having many decisions you have made “under your belt” with you feelings of “personal competence” growing, as well as your understanding of what your own limits are, and who you are comfortable with, choosing better trusting relationships, and leaving “dying” or “flat” relationships behind. You are now more competent in making good choices, for good results and good consequences, and getting more ‘wisdom” about your own life, every day. Getting up in the morning is no longer a “dread’, but a looking forward to a “new day” of endless possibilities right in front of YOU.
Thank you for this Jerry!
What a lightbulb moment. I have never read or heard of anyone explaining how to get the ''scapegoatism'' out of me. I've been searching for this for such a long time. I've watched the video and taken some notes as well!
Btw, do you have a transcript of this video as I would like to go back later to refresh my memory of what was said in this video?.
Reading a transcript is faster for me than watching the whole video again. Thanks!
Thank you for watching
I'm sorry I don't have a transcript for this video
There are apps you can get that can transcribe this video for you.
Happy Holidays!
resonate
Kingdom of darkness / world system .. u get very little , takes everything in return . Kingdom of heaven / Lord Jesus Christ system .. u get everything, takes very little in return.
If i buy 3 differentiated books, that i, alone am interested in, why does that bother other people? I have ALWAYS had many different interests to read about and learn about. I am curious about different ideas in life, and i have no expectations of others in these interests. I, alone, want to learn. My “stance” has never changed. I have ALWAYS wanted to understand differences. What THEY think and Do, does not make me have think and do the same things.
That sounds like “behavioral learning theory” modification. It’s like climbing a mountain all the way to the top, with more and more resistance on the way up.
I am still a concerned American citizen, and a Protestant Christian, but i like learning new things. “If you find that you are continually annoyed at someone who refuses to change, you are refusing to change.” The GOAL is to fully be who I am. I am moving slowly away from “the Role”….more into ME.
Growth usually happens in spurts.
13:09 Response to your differentiation (stages of resistance)
❤️
I want to join, but don’t see join button
What device are you using to find the join button? Phone PC IPAd?
It should be next to the subscribe button
Use your browser. Go on You tube use chrome, safari, etc.
Their opinion of me is not my opinion of me.
9 23 27