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Don't talk back to your Parents! - Nouman Ali Khan
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- Опубликовано: 18 фев 2016
- Ihsan is a beautiful word, and the wisdom behind the use of this word with regards to parents is stunning. Ihsan comes from husn, which literally means beauty or to make beautiful. Ihsan means to do the UTMOST good and it is usually translated as excellence. When one does ihsan, they beautify their deeds to the fullest. They go “all out” and make sure every little detail is done properly. They do not do the least amount of good to get the job done, rather they do the utmost good-the greatest possible good they are capable of doing and they do not fall short in this.
I really struggle when it comes being good to my mom sometimes it's really hard May God help me
Rayaan Abdullahi hassan same here :(
Rayaan Abdullahi hassan remember allah watches everything aslong as you try make dua you will get there
Rayaan Abdullahi hassan all of us. ameen...
Rayaan Abdullahi hassan Aameen
Rayaan Abdullahi hassan be kind and good to your parents, because one day they won't be there with us and they you will have much regret and pain wallahi brother. she made you a man and took you 9 months with pain. Parents are the key to Jannah
may Allah make us the best children ameen
Ammmiinnn...
Ameen
Ameen
Ameen
+Farhiya Adan امين , Ameen
I think at times God tests us when dealing with our parents. We can be good in all acts of worship but at times our parents annoy us and we talk back or behave sulkishly but the Quran tells us not to. Some people have really easy going parents but they are tested in other ways and some might find it easy to perform other acts of worship but might be tested with a parent not so easy going. May Allah grant us patience and humility when dealing with our parents and may He guide us to the path of those on whom He is happy with. Amen
this is 100%accurate and one way applied to me and the other to my cousin ,
Aisha T Aameen
oh :( u said exactly whats like that,,, my mom is vry annoying, i know i shouldnt talk back abt her, but shes very harsh abusive, beats me sometimes, , i have a questuion in my mind if shes bad and if i talk back why will i be a sinner? ...
Aisha T amen
Aameen
yes! I'm muslim and I was talking back to my mother this morning may Allah teach me better then that
same i talk back to my dad
Pro Saufi
Something Nice
Shouldn't you be asking forgiveness from Allah rather than typing this comment and letting everyone know your sin? Just a thought
Something Nice ,may Allah help us treat our parents with respect ameen
Something Nice
Found 114 likes, didn't want to change this wonderful number.
ohhhh!!!!! whatever he said in his speech it really applies to me. I think iam the worst child...... insha allah i willlllllll change. Sure!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She's only 10 years old shall I show her this
assalamu alaikum.. I don't think it would be a very good idea to show this to a 10 year old child. Show this when you think she is mature enough to understand... or else she'll be like, "Yeah, whatevs." Only when she has the true intelligence, would this be something you should do Inshaa'Allah. Until then, be a good mother Inshaa'Allah, and I hope for the best. :)
Saarah Ahmed SHOW IT TO HER PLS 10 is past the age I learnt many thing since I was 4 yrs I wish someone taught me great things like this advice.
Same😓
love the positivity
This is the hardest thing to follow may allah show us the right path
Allah is always with A capital name of the only King 👑
"Don't kill your kids because of bankruptcy." Boy, am I glad you mentioned that?
I think that the value and high reverence of parents is clearly understood in the Quran. The reminder of how we need to treat parents should always be on the top of our minds before we speak our raw feelings out loud. Filter and think first before hurting their feelings or anyone else's. However, our Muslim speakers tend to take interpretations and translate the applications of the meanings to black and white. We need to go beyond this for addressing real world problems that is leaving a deep divide in many.
I think in these days, these kind of speeches from our Muslim brothers do not go deep enough. These topics are covered VERY GENERAL and BROADLY. What about in-laws or marriage? What about if your parents insist or FORCE on you a lifestyle which you do not choose? Such as choice of a career, a suitor, or life goals that they have in mind for you although you have different aspirations or want to make your own choices? This is happening a lot! What about mental health? Some people may suffer from bipolar, depression and other psychological issues and this could apply to the parents or their children. Believe it or not, this occurs more often than one would think! For some parents, you DO do the best for them, but it is never good enough. The complaining or unattainable unrealistic cultural expectations from one parent or the other or both is never ending and exhausting. I have seen all these scenarios occur. Where parents do stifle the decision-making, self confidence, and other important developments of their children although they are full adults. There is a culture barrier from generation to generation and I agree that there should ALWAYS be a very high level of respect and adoration for parents. Yet again, there is a gap that is growing as times change, and many of our speakers and leaders are not going into depth enough into addressing the real ROOT issues this generation faces. For example, this speaker is young but he preaches the same unchanged message that I have heard for the past 20 years. There is a disconnect, or a lack of genuine understanding of what kids in this generation are facing today. As a result, the guilt for some children is overwhelming. No real support seems to be given. We need to do more than just preach ....we should offer real solutions to problems that are faced today. This lecturer doesn't talk about HOW TO CONNECT WITH YOUR PARENTS AT ALL. And many of them don't. It almost sounds like obedience is the best method. Don't even try to attempt at true understanding or discussion. This is troubling to say the least. You can easily lose your kids and the umma this way. It doesn't offer real solutions to deal with frustrations. More understanding and discussion will lead to better relationships and healthier growth. It's not the easy route, but it's worth it if you love your parents, children, and family. Jizak Allah Khair.
Muslima WithAMind I can totally relate to you.Sometimes I feel so hopeless because what I want to do in life is totally different from what my parents expected me to do.In my community,at some point of life,children (including daughters) are expected to bring/give lots of money to parents no matter how hard our life is.When I choose to do something beneficial concerning my Akhira,which subsequently giving less money too the parents,they somwhow felt that I am not obedient/good daughter anymore.😣😢
Muslima WithAMind
you are right ..exactly parents expect too much ... ecpecially after marriage ..
Layla22 of course treat them with respect. But sometimes, parents pressure their children to follow their traditional norms even if the child doesn't want to. For example ( and not the only one), early marriages. I know the Prophet صلى الله عليه و سلم said you can't force your daughters into a marriage they don't agree on, but unfortunately, many parents do so. My own grandmother was told by her parents that they would curse her if she didn't marry the man they wanted her to marry, and she later on married him because of them ( my grandfather was MUCH older than her and had multiple wives).
Now how in the world could she have evaded their curse if she didn't agree to the marriage?
Now, I need help. My mother is threatening to curse me cause she doesn't like the way I take care of my hair ( that I finger comb it instead of brushing it). She has soft 2a-2b hair, while mine lies between 3b-4a. I always used to brush my hair, till I did a lot of research on hair and realized I was supposed to finger comb it cause brushing it would cause a lot of hair breakage ( which was true I was losing a lot of hair). I stopped brushing it around 2 months ago, and now my mom is literally praying for me to have the most hard headed child when I grow up. I don't want to upset my mom ( cause I love her), but at the same time I finally started to like my hair. What should I do?
This life is about us. All that matter is what we do and we will be paid for what we did in this life good or bad. There is no such thing as striving for understanding of each other. Muslim are supposed to love each other because of our faiths and love of Allah. Dealing with parents who reach old age are supposed to be very difficult, that is why it rewards jannah. They will act ridiculous and hard to deal with exactly because they're old.
Despite everything i said, i have trouble dealing with my parents and you are right that this kind of approach only adds stress and no solution, you can't be forced to love who you don't love (yet). All we can do is try our best and hope that Allah open our hearts and their hearts, because unless that happens you will never attain that ideal relationship. And yes, some people have it easy, i agree.
ruclips.net/video/xZUQ_yzueTU/видео.html
I find it hard sometimes to treat them the best. But I really try hard to do it. Please make dua for me.
Give your parents the very best
I hope some scolar would also explain about toxic parents. Who are abusive to their children and never show them atleast a little love.
Salam Alaikum. I really needed this today. For the past few years I have been trying to be a better son and Believer. Today, during the last 10 days of fasting Ramadan I slipped up in annoyance, negative speech and gestures towards my mom (who is the most hard working and down to earth); I gave into anger and frustration which I almost always choose silence or healthy conversation over. Through my guilt I found myself here. "Why am I doing this during Ramadan?" "Isn't satan the accursed in jail?" My nafs never takes a day off and it is inseparable from me. We already made up but I can't easily forgive myself. It makes me hate myself like I used to before Islam. I took my oath but still slip up. I will pray and ask for forgiveness but I still feel unworthy. Sorry for this public rant. Just maybe something relatable for someone out there one day. As the speaker said, "keep your mouth shut and head down" with your parents.
No one taught us the meaning of this ayah like this, SubhanAllaah. Just want to go to my parents right now and saying sorry for whatever I did to them and thought about them and however I behaved with them...You never seem to realize how it feels like until you are yourself a parent. You have to sacrifice so much for your kids and only Allah SWT knows what the parents did or are doing because the babies are too young to remember and so HE orders the children through HIS book, Wa Bil-walidayini Ehsaan-an...amazing...Jazakumullahu Khayran ya akhi Nouman
Brought tears to my eyes..
Thank you for being such a great teacher. I'm learning a whole lot of things from you.
May Allah bless you :')
Rabbir HamHumaa Kamaa Rabayanii Sagheera! ...
A duah For our Parents! 💪 Ameen Ya rabb
Ameen
Add me on snapchat: smiling_ukht In Shaa Allah you guys will benefit.
Ameen
Ameen Summa Ameen
Arhamhuma** ارحمهما
May Allaah (S.W) guide and bless our parents and may He (S.W) guide everyone to the right way aameen.
Good gestures is a characteristic of Muslim
I'm a hindu i was there nearby a railway station in Chennai, India I took an auto for going to somewhere
The driver was a traditionally well dressed Muslim guy with long but well mannered beard aged between 40-45, from boarding to getting down he didn't say anything neither I except the fair n location but his smiling gestures/his attitudes without even sharing much talks...was something that i can never forget.
that time i felt if the beloved Prophet Mohammad(pbuh) had such type of unexplainable charisma...
and how if we got the same experience in our day to day life if all our muslim brothers make everyone feel like the same!
A powerful reminder in an unusually engaging way to encourage us to want the best for our parents. The advice was on-spot!
now as an Adult i feel so ashamed of my self for fighting with my mom on things as a teen i wish i could fix the loss i have had.
Kashaf may Allah Subhanahu wata'ala forgive you, Aameen
Repent and amend your behavior now
What did you learn now that you're an adult?I would love to improve myself
This touches such a soft and painful spot for me, my mother often uses me as a punching bag (figuratively), I used to be good at remaining silent but wallah I got tired - I know I'm wrong, I'm trying. If your parents swear at you for nothing, must you remain silent? Obedient? I am trying, I ask Allah for help, please pray for me
I'm in the same position, I just don't understand why we are forced to remain silent and respectful when we aren't treated in the same manner. Sometimes things like this make it hard for me to not question islam .
@@maryamali5719 ruclips.net/video/qwUsCKJmNj0/видео.html
@@maryamali5719 I didn't question Islam but I thought I was a bad daughter, but when I listened to this I felt relief so maybe it will help you
ruclips.net/user/shortsvV4mF61v27U?feature=share
@@maryamali5719 I don't know why scholars didn't talk about children rights in Islam in the last decade , a lot of people hated Islam and maybe even left it, but I'm happy that they started to talk about it these last years and shows that we have rights to protect ourselves
no there are also children rights but scholars only talk about parent rights lol :/
Treat your parents in the best way and you will see the result in your life. And you will find you and yourself in peace. They are privileged people..respect them.
I am crying right now
Why do you need to tell us?
Its fake acting
@@roserain5181 not seriously
Wabilwalidaini Ehsaana..Subahan Allah the beautiful explaination
Even I noticed that in Salah the last dua we have also includes dua for our parents ..Rabbijialni muqeemaslati....
in my view this man is right Allah bless you bro noumon Ali khan
Jazak Allah khair.... May Allah gives long life to sir nouman ali khan... he is the best....
Thank you. I am a trouble son. I hope we all can be the best for both of our parents
Say :
Subhan'Allah ×3
Alhamdulillah ×3
Allahu'Akbar ×3
Subhanallahi wa bihamdihi subhanallahil azeem ×3
Alhamdulillah we just earned great rewards!
It hard when u have abusive parents
may Allah make it easy on us
this is so real may allah forgive the kids that speak back to there parentes
Abdullah Kassem Aameen
Anything that are not the best for the parent is haram. Very powerful word. May Allah grant us guidance to give the best we can for our parent. Amin
I love u brother noman may Allah protect you
You guys have given to much respect to parents . What about parents doing wrong to one of they children. Being unreasonable to the old child after using him all his life . Pakistani culture
*MashaALLAH. The Almighty is great... I'm A simple Human. Growing Up to understand people. Hopefully Our kids can respect Us to be A Good in their life. Aaamiiin.☺
Thankyou sir for sharing your ideas and knowledge and guiding everyone towards Allah.Allah the Almighty is great.
Alhamdulillah. Everything in the light of knowledge explained. Mashallah brother Norman. Your amazing explanation
may Allah grant all muslims jannah
Masha my Allah blessed u
Parents are blessings:)
May Allah Subhanahu-wa-taa'la grant you Jannah. Thank u
Thank you for this video.i needed this😢❤
Masha Allah sheikh beautiful reminder may Allah SWT make us to love our mothers and father's
I really needed that ! Thank you
but what if your mother keeps shouting at you and swearing at you and always talks bad about others? then what should we do? because there's a limit to everything. what should we do?
That's under the assumption that parents are perfect. You haven't answered the persons question at all.
Yassir Douslimi You still seem to think that all parents are perfectly rational. Not all of what makes a parent shout and take out their anger on their children is because of the actions of the child.
Yassir Douslimi a weakness within themselves.
For example, a parent who is upset due to something happening to them (say at work or outside) and they know that the only ones who are obliged to tolerate their behaiviour are their children, they take out their frustration out on them.
+Nadym Kondokar so what. Having parents and children are but temporary and a test. U want paradise easily, treat them well; Be the best. In the end, we are what we earn on judgement day individually. I have my own fair share of seeing parents abusing children psychologically, emotionally, physically. As time passes, children becomes mature and understanding. As for the perfect parent, it depends on environment the child is being brought up; doesn't matter rich or poor. Hopefully you don't give excuse.
so many good advice here alhamdullillah. May Allah (swt) bless us and forgive us. Another thing is we continue to ask Allah (swt) for help. We can ask Him to make it easy for us to behave kindly to our parents, also pray that our parents don't shout at us etc. and seek His forgiveness when we make mistake and talk back etc. Inshallah He (swt) will help us. He has power over all things.
I talk back to my mother and I always angry at her May Allah forgive me
i..i..idk what to say i mean im just ok with my parents but this was way more that a wake up call for meh and i bet for the others ....Hamdullyllah ....Thank you brother .....jzaak Allah keer
very nice......ameen
jazakoum lahu khayran for that
well my Dad left me nd my mom whn I was 1... 😌😌soo I only have to got to be good to my mom.. ehehehehhe thankuuu v much allah...its sort of a pressure relief..🤗🤗🤗
Tahir Mehar
lolx
my daughter who wears hijab but i can never say anything without her getting offended or saying oh well you said this to me not only that she has trained her brother and sister to do the same thing to the point her brother now does the same thing. sometimes i wish i was single and never got married and died without getting married or having kids
It's also mentioned in sureh Isra and you will be told to read your book of records and you will be auditor yourself on the day of judgement and while mentioning major sins Allah has mentioned to not even say 'Uff' in the middle of those ayahs. May Allah make us of those who comprehend and reason and do righteous deeds and stay away from sins , May Allah make us ashab of Qur'an who not only reads it but who reflects and acts upon the order of Allah Subhanahuta'aala. Ameen
Dude I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m 14 years old and I yell at my parents all the time and instantly regret it and pray to allah to forgive me. I slam the door in their face, I start yelling talking badly (no cussing though) and wallah I feel depressed and I don’t know what to do and I just hope one day ima get put straight. Someone please tell me what I should do I don’t want to go through this anymore. Please keep me in your prayers.
Don't take what they say seriously when they are mad.. Sometimes, we can't even control ourself when we get mad.. Just like them.. Parents are not perfect too.. Be easy on them..
Think about how no one will love you and care for you like your parents do if they were to pass away. before you're tempted to talk back think about all the struggles your mother went through to bring you in this world and raised you.
You may need to work on your reputation with your parents. Find ways to build trust and keep it consistent. Are you a gamer btw?
Alhamdulillaah excellent! Baarak Allaahu feek.
جزاک اللہ
Initially I would keep quite because I feared allah and I dint want to hurt him..
I am proud to be the best girl with the best character..no bad habits ,no friends,no outings,,,no relationship,,and deeply intreasted in studies..
My mom became so toxic that she tried to destroy my mental peace and dint let me study..
Allah swt helped and I did not stop..
But she kept on abusing and playing games..to a point where my silence broke,my soul broke
She bought me to a point where I was like..if that hurt you ya rab I'm sorry but I can't take this..and I would cry the entire day..
I've dealt with thr most toxic women and I'm still dealing..
May Allah help us all 😭
Love You Sir !!!
Subhanallah eye opener
this was a wakeup call!!
Masha Allah
thank you so much
two years later did you woke up?
29 March 2022
﷽
In this dream I see a small hill and that I have to climb on this hill and say the Adzan (calling for prayer). I am also accompanied by some people. As I walk towards this hill, I am confused at first because I have never done this, but I feel that I have been instructed to give Adzan. So in some hesitation I continued to walk towards the hill.
When I get to the top of the hill and begin the Adzan. When I begin with ‘Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar’ my Adzan does not sound professional (like the Adhan given in mosques which has a beautiful tone of recitation). But as I continue further in reciting the Adzan, reaching the part Ashadu an La Ilaha Illallah, Ashadu annamu hammadur Rasool Allah’ it continues to become better and professional. When I recite the part ‘Hayyalas Salah Hayyalal Falah’ I do it with a professional tone like in the mosque. Then I see that more religious people beneath the hill start noticing my Adzan and they seem impressed. I finally say ‘Allahu Akbar Allahu Akbar, La ilaha illAllah’ in a beautiful and professional way, then it comes to my mind that this Adzan ending sounds just the way it was done hundreds of years ago in Makkah, when the first Adzan happened in Makkah. Dream Ends
🌟Please find more about these important dreams of Muhammad Qasim. We are the last generation of this world
Keep going this nice work
Very good explanation
I struggle to be good to behave to my parents but Allah will help me to be the best
May Allah help me from stop doing this ameen
Sad Rotmg Aameen
I love my parents.. wish I Pray that they move in the same house. Really miss them
May Allah forgive me for talking back to my mom
Ameen beautiful lessons
😭Ustad, I'm speechless. But, Allah first.
I can't believe what my mom just did.. I will never forgive her...
parents can be your test subhanAllah. state your opinion you have a right to esp as an adult just be respectful about it
May Allah bless us with this implication
This man is awesome
What if the mother is someone who keeps blaming you with things you haven't even done? I'm so done
Sounds like you've got to work on your reputation with her. Find ways to build trust and keep it consistent.
Then also you’ve to be the absolute best.Not a exception for anyone.You can only talk back that also politely when parents tell u to not follow Allah’s commands.
@@professorposh4146 my mum doesn't even let me have an opinion
@@rayanrizwan9611 Action speaks louder than words. Work hard to become someone that your parents and others will value and only then will they listen. You've got to prove yourself first!
Going back to this
You watching this after something bad happened between you and your mother or father? If so I'm in the same boat as you
😢 I try to just ignore my mom’s acts and action , I try my best not to be mad with her , I try to understand her , but some times I just can’t handle it … may Allah help us all in our tests
Just try to do your best to remain silent and look down and maybe after she finishes talking you should leave that room or that place for some amount of time. And try to talk less with her on that day. May Allah guide us all Aameen 🤲🏻.
When you will ask those who doesn't have parents, they literally miss their parents scold and everything their love their shouting. 😢
May Allah give our parents long and healthy life with taqwa, full of blessings and mercy Aameen.
I also feel so heart broken I always back answer my parents because I feel like I am big. May Allah forgive me and help me to be respectful. Aameen Yaa Rabb. 😢
But they don’t give me time and this thing kills me I do everything they asked me for but in return I just ask for their love
Asc Ustadh NAK you always capable to convince me i do sometimes talk back To my mom but i regret after doing that i just can't control my anger may Allah guide me and all , I will change in cha allah .
+Nagadita M Khan We should control our anger if we want Jannah :)
I will try my best in cha allah 😯
may ALLAH grant us goodness amiin
Xeybo Xasan Aameen
I really Need to improve the respect with my mom
No one teaches like that (Y) jazak Allah
In shaa ALLAH 🌸💖
jazak Allah khair
I try to aspire to be a psychologist but my parents are doctors so naturally they want me to do that. It gets hard to be respectful to them and still not give in. At times my mother gets emotional and she almost starts to weep and that breaks my heart so bad because I swear there's hardly anything worse than seeing your mother cry and knowing it's linked to you. She says a lot of things that she doesn't mean when she's like that and those are very hurtful phrases. They've Always asked me to do what makes me happy but at deciding points like these, they want me to comply with their wishes. I can't do that, with all due respect. Any advice would be appreciated. Please make dua for me :)
Same is the case with me brother, but you know what put all your matters in the hands of allah and then see the change,the lightness of your heart,trust me I am experiencing it now and this feeling of putting your trust in Allah is mesmerizing ☺️.May Allah give peace to your heart and mine too.Aameen
May Allah make it easy 😬
الله يهدي اولاد المسلمين ويصلحهم في امه الصالحين
i like this Nouman ali khan for Allahs sake
At the right time
Alhamdullilah with my mom I find it easy to be respectful to her but with my dad it’s much harder and I try my best but he’s very argumentative and constantly short tempered and I have deep anger within myself towards him. I normally just talk in soft kind voice but he talks in a rude way that makes me lose my cool at times. Plus we have completely opposite personality’s I’m very quiet and chill while he’s more talkative and social l
what abusive parents , how to deal and still be good with them even thoe they cross the line of reason
you have to, there's no "if" condition in that ayah....
do ihsaan and let them do what they are doing..!! you just have to do your part which is Ihsaan ..!!
ruclips.net/video/xZUQ_yzueTU/видео.html
ruclips.net/video/xZUQ_yzueTU/видео.html
I am just at the start of getting into Islam again
I see many questions about what to do if the parents are this and that etc.
we take the word of allah for granted that means it doesn't matter how they are we have to give them the best
if they are clearly wrong in terms of Religion we have to be righteous and WITH RESPECT tell them sorry mom or sorry dad you cant say that or do that its not right
its maybe not what many of you want to hear but its about allah he gave us the command
thats my understanding / point of view at the moment
(coming from someone who didnt talk and talked bad about his dad for a long time)
JazakAllaahu khair sir
😭😭😭😭 May Allah forgive us😣😣😣
Saboomful1 Aameen
Beautiful MashAllah
please pray for my brother..He is becoming way more aggressive day by day.He doesn't respect my mom and dad even a little bit..He constantly talks back to them and uses slang words(Astagfirullah).It's just getting out of control..I try to convince him but it doesn't work..He is very much addicted to game and he is becoming a liar also..my parents are constantly worried because of him..May Allah(swt) bless him and show him the right path.
@Sumaiya Samad Ameen...Zazakallahu khairan sister
never thought like this
How can I be good to both parents, when I never know one part of my parents?
Keep praying for them
It's strange that all these speakers don't talk too much about bad parents, and their punishments for using their children and not leading them to success or even teaching and preparing the kids for life.
I'm struggling with my parents right now for being too loyal and dutiful to them all my life, and in the end, I'm faulted for their failures as parents, although I was never given a paycheck during the years I worked, and there was no payoff in the end. In fact, the old man sold most of his land, and is pissing it away on bad ideas. 75 years old, retired, and is opening a farm as if he's 40 years old and planning to live another 30 years. He has went against the entire family, but expects us to be there to help him. Unfortunately, this right of their's "be dutiful to your parents" has manifested into narcissism and unfair treatment.
Also, why don't you go into details about the children's rights, like the importance of treating all the children equally? How can parents pick and choose who to help or pay, and who not to?
سلام علیکم thank you very much brother.
Always say yes to your parents and be respectful to them
Always say yes to them except when it violates Allah's rights but disagree and teach them politely.
You can also say no sometimes right like what if they want to hurt you can you say no
i never disrespect my parents especially my mom i always respect her never talk back with her and same with my dad
ALL i will say is 1 thing, these scholars dont know the idea what its like to be emotionally verbally physically abusive parents, who torture u and yell at u infront of people making ur self respect 0, making u mentally sick, when we dont have mental health, we cant even focus on salah properly,then hw can we bear the abuse? ,, i know many ppl wud thinks that children who talk behind their parents are bad children,,but thats not the case,,, i know this is rare case when ur own parents is abusive and toxic and horrible, but its not impossible also.
subhanallah