Psychologist Discusses Ali Abulaban's Testimony & Attempt to Make Himself the Victim
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 27 сен 2024
- Today licensed psychologist, Dr. Patrice Berry discusses this tragic case. Ali Abulaban is on trial accused of killing his wife, 28-year-old Ana Abulaban, and 29-year-old Rayburn Barron inside an East Village apartment back in October of 2021.
4 Types of narcissists: Grandiose, Malignant, Covert, & Communal
--------------------------------------------------------------
Join this channel & become a member:
/ @drpatriceberry
--------------------------------------------------------------
REFERENCES and RESOURCES to go deeper:
Full Video 1: • TikTok Star Ali Abulab...
Video 2: • TikTok Star Ali Abulab...
Cross Examination: • TikTok Star Ali Abulab...
4 Types of Narcissism Dr. Ramani: • 4 Types of Narcissism
Dr. Ramani Video: Types of Narcissists in Parenting • The 5 types of narciss...
Dr. Ramani Spotting Malignant Narcissists: • How to Keep an Eye Out...
Recognizing and escaping: • Recognising And Escapi...
Tools to find a licensed therapist:
www.psychologytoday.com
www.therapyforblackgirls.com
www.therapyforblackmen.org
www.openpathcollective.com
Lists of multiple abuse/neglect/etc hotlines: www.pleaselive....
--------------------------------------------------------------
I WROTE A BOOK!
If you enjoy my content here or on my other social platforms, then this book is essentially tailored for you. Think of it as a compilation of these videos, presented in a book format, equipped with practical tools that will leave you well-informed and empowered.
Get yours here: Turning Crisis Into Clarity: How to survive or thrive in the midst of uncertainty a.co/d/gMwKwcU
(affiliate link, Dr. Berry receives a small commission from qualifying sales)
-------------------------------------------------------------
HI THERE!
If you're new here, welcome! I'm a licensed clinical psychologist who uses social media to educate, break stigma, and give you practical information on a variety of mental health topics. I cover popular topics from media and the court system/law and I also provide information on depression, anxiety, parenting, and healing trauma. All free of shame and judgment....because that's how it should always be. Be sure to subscribe and turn on notifications so you never miss an upload.
-------------------------------------------------------------
BE SOCIAL!
Don't forget to come follow along elsewhere!
Instagram: / drpatriceberry.com
TikTok: / drpatriceberry.com
Website: www.drpatriceb...
Email: info@drpatriceberry.com
--------------------------------------------------------------
FAIR-USE COPYRIGHT DISCLAIMER:
Copyright Disclaimer Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, commenting, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.
Please contact me before making claims.
Want to create live streams like this? Check out StreamYard: streamyard.com...
The sound is coming through my headphones and my earrings are hitting it 😂😂😂 my bad ❤
17:00 the malignant narcissist 🎉 so spot on!
(Narcissist has become a buzzword and often misused so thank you for insight, knowledge and education.)
The “fine” details, unusual pointed out detail and non verbal communication is very interesting.
Common theme: I did this (damage control, reclaim of control and preservation of his imagine) and her response to him wasn’t what he desired (his set image of her was negative)
IMO: Personality disorder while self medicating is… well.. dangerous..
Very reactive person.
🤣 Dr Berry that question he asked the Judge I laughed so hard, his testimony was wild!
@@FaithM1976 😂😂😂 why do I have to answer questions that make me look bad??? Sir…sir…this is how courts work 🤦🏾♀️😅😂
Oh girl, beauty is everything. Rock those earrings.
He needs to be in prison for life. Dangerous man to society. He's not fooling anyone with his son story.
Dangerous to women only.
He seems like he would do it again if he felt disrespected
Yessss.. When he said, “I couldn’t believe she could do this to our daughter”, I nearly lost my mind. The audacity smh he literally, single-handedly ruined his daughter’s life.
He’s hiding behind his childhood and it’s likely true, but it doesn’t justify his actions at all. He had other options but chose the one he wanted. Thanks for covering this Dr. Berry. 😊
Exactly. Our past experiences can provide context and an explanation for our views and thought patterns, but they can never excuse bad behavior. Our trauma isn't our fault, but it is our responsibility.
I’ve never seen a witness testimony like this before. He’s not answering questions, he’s telling a story. He’s asking questions to the lawyers. It’s like a conversation rather than testimony. But he would have had this conversation with the police officers and investigators before the trial. He didn’t need to do all this on the stand. But he couldn’t help himself. He’s a manipulator, a narcissist, and a performer.
I’ve never seen a defendant act this angry and explosive on the stand….Darrell Brooks was this was throughout the court proceedings.
@@DrPatriceBerryyesss! JHis behavior in court was just as unhinged as Daryl Brooks’ 😫
This man is frightening. He should never be allowed into the public ever again.
That part!
Thank you for covering this! This type of person is difficult to recognize in the beginning.
The love bombing at the beginning is real. He likely hid all of this until he knew he had her…and it likely started slowly. They also find your vulnerabilities and use it against you. I think Ana felt trapped once they shared a child and wanted to make it work for her daughter
Yes, Dr Berry is right- they tell you who they are uo front but most don’t know what the red flags are. I all it guarantee you he proposed to Anna within months of dating, married her quickly, and got her pregnant quickly. This is how they claim their territory. They make escaping VERY hard. Then they remove their mask and the monster comes out, but most normal men don’t love bomb you and push the relationship ahead. That’s the tell. Like, if you had JUST met him on an online dating app, he’d be talking about how he has a special feeling about you and he will make charming comments about you being a future wife. For naive women it’s cute. For mature women it’s disturbing.
Misc. thoughts:
1. This crime was definitely premeditated (imo). He took his gun with him for a reason, and there was a reason he didn’t want her to know he was on his way there.
2. He’s definitely not a good enough actor to testify in his own defense. 😅
3. I’m looking forward to them shaving his head after he’s convicted - I think that will piss him off.
4. He says, “That’s not fair. That’s not fair. That’s so inappropriate.” What the ACTUAL F***!?!? Really, a-hole!?!? How dare you!!!!
This guy makes me soooooooo angry!!!!!😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
5. Something “upsetted” him? Not only is he an a-hole, he talks like a first grader.
6. I totally agree: The curls are phenomenal!
🧠 ❤
Thanks for watching 🙌🏾❤️
The fact that she changed the locks & he still managed to find a way to get in speaks of how dangerous he is.He already knew that she was DONE & was planning on killing her alone/with someone.Googled decapitated heads, bodies & trash cans.Unhinged !
She did not change the locks. He gave her back the keys but did not tell her that he made a copy.
I hope that her parents get to raise their daughter
I've wondered where her parents are. Does she have siblings?
@@juditube391her parents live in the Philippines… that’s where she is from.
I could be wrong, but I heard Ali’s mom is raising the daughter.
@kellyg2426 I heard that too and it's a crying shame!
@@juditube391 I also heard that Anna’s parents still live in Japan which may explain why Ali’s mom may be raising her.
I am SO glad you covered this! As i watched the trial, I literally shuddered. The entirety of his behaviour reminds me so much of my ex-husband, who has a similar back story to Ali (muslim, culture, patriarchy, family dynamics, etc). While watching the trial, I thought of you and other channels and hoped you'd cover it. You describing him as you did completely validated my feelings. I still, to this day, doubt my own thoughts and feelings because of what a man just like this did to me. This trial, him, his voice, all triggered the heck out of me. Thank you for this video.
P.s. My new partner is also muslim, so im not saying that's something all Muslim men do. They dont!
Thanks for watching and adding that this isn’t how all Arab/Muslim men are 🙌🏾❤️
I was triggered by him too
I think some use their culture or religion as an excuse or way to control kinda like how some bad pastors will say women are supposed to serve their husband and take it too literal. I think it’s an excuse when they are this Americanized and know better. Especially if they are not truly practicing their faith or celebrating that culture other than when it’s convenient
Well, as an ex-Muslimah I can say the religion is pretty much misogynistic.
@@NjvghvvnnI don't think first-generation immigrants are "Americanised". How can you say that someone who's mother was r%^&& as a minot and kept like a trafficking victim not have some sort of issues?
Your commentary is excellent and a class act. Thanks for speeding through to the relevant parts. Many of us suffered corporal punishment as children. It's not an indicator that we have rage & will murder people. He should have taken a plea deal as this court case impeaches him & reinforces all your points! If you bring a gun, it's pure premeditation.
Many people speculate that he wanted his day in court/his 5 min of fame 😞 it is just so sad that his daughter may find his testimony someday
I'm divorced from a Malignant Narcissist and following this trial I saw my ex through and through. I had to flee from him to another place, new job, cause he also threatened to kill me. Always blamed me of cheating, even blamed me that I left him for another man. Crying like a baby cause he couldn't control me anymore.
That’s so scary. The worst time is after saying you’re leaving or trying to leave. That’s when they can become the most dangerous.
@@kateashby3066 Absolutely yes!!! Thats why I had to leave in secret
I had the misfortune of a Malignant Narcissist interrupt my life. This one was incapable of feelings that normal people feel. Basically dead, empty inside. Ego so fragile, their anger will try to destroy your life. Thank you Dr. Berry.
56:00 I agree, the act no tears, no mucus no respiratory distress.. the hot and cold of attempting to display emotion.. I really hope their daughter mind heart and soul can heal..
Ok, watched the whole video. Whew! I hope you continue coverage as much as your schedule allows. Thanks again, Doc! ❤
Thanks so much for watching! They aren’t live streaming this one and Court Tv seems to be putting out videos after court
@@DrPatriceBerry Ooooh, Doc, I’m watching his second day on the stand with cross. He’s tap dancing so hard.
@@Bozbaby103 I’m watching now too and he got worse today on the stand.
Omg when prosecution asked him about pictures of teens on his phone and he blew up. Well played prosecution
He lost it! I don’t think they should have asked about the inmate who overheard a rumor. Hopefully that doesn’t cause any issues (appeal or mistrial)
@@DrPatriceBerryhe never denied it just argued it wasn’t in evidence . Told on himself
The cross-examination was brutal he going to get the maximum.
I truly hope so, by testify he truly shows his true colours
This was just another ‘role’ for him, I’m sure he’s rehearsed this 100’s of times in his tin mirror, to his cell mates and with his lawyer. He has HIS SCRIPT and he’s sticking to it. Utterly disingenuous testimony that won’t fool any jury.
1:04:44 oh my god dr berry!! This reminds me of a game show I watched a long time ago! I wanna say it was Survivor. Anyway the guy lost and was quoted as saying “I lost because of a bunch of RULES!” 😂 this moment in the trial reminds me of that 😂😂😂
I haven't heard his voice before, but the soft-spoken, calm quiet voice he's using, if faked/forced, is exactly what my dad would do to put us at ease and manipulate into thinking he's actually a good and loving father right after a beating. Makes me ill.
It’s like he rehearsed it like a hundred times for a part. He is super controlling
I think he likely practiced his part and he wasn’t ready for the prosecution
Exactly my thoughts, imo, it's like he practised his possible answers. I once shared a house with another female who's partner treated her the same way. This creeps me out because Ali looks just like him
I don’t think he had to rehearse very much… he’s very familiar with his own story and his spin. It’s the most amazing story ever! Just ask ALI! 😵💫😵💫😵💫
This guy is a monster!! Life, no parole...period
I had a relationship with a man like this when I was younger. He tried to kill me, but he ended up killing himself in 2005. Once you have experienced this personality type, you can recognize it almost instantly in other people.
Same here
Oh my god I’m so sorry. I hope that wasn’t too traumatizing for you 😢. And youre right!! My father is a narcissist and now that I know that I can spot them quickly and easily.
I love the way you explain everything it's not dragged out,but to the point and educational I have subscribed great episode
Thanks so much! Welcome!!
Agreed. I can totally see the lawyers telling him it’s not a good idea to get on the stand, and him insisting on doing it despite their advice. I think he really thought he could paint Ana and Ray in a bad light and convince the court to believe his narrative.
I also think he didn’t like listening to other people tell their side and wanted to tell his. The fact that he still believed that Ana had no right to move on…would have sealed murder 1 for me.
@@DrPatriceBerry yes, his perspective is the only perspective that matters to him smh he’s so full of himself, that it stunted his ability to read the room
Listening to cross. He is digging his grave deeper and deeper. If I was a juror, he’d be guilty in my mind before he testified, but this? Ooooh, buddy…. Wish jurors could speak during the verdict phase. I’d have a LOT to say.
Same!
I was with a malignant narcissist for 20 yrs. I'm so sad Anna's precious life ended by this psychopath. It is very hard to leave and go (no contact) when you have children. These type of men use children to hurt the mother. I no doubt believe she heard many threats to kill to control her knowing she never wanted to be with him again. She was finally fed up with his lies and tricks. Flowers were always after the worst abuse (emotional, vicious physical abuse, they control the money, friends, etc. There is no freedom with this cruel personality). Manipulation and control while they treat you like dirt. The hate grows the longer you stay with them. They definitely play the victim and family normally believes the abuser but my friends were supportive and would hear my cries of abuse. His affairs were plenty and even though I was faithful he accused me of doing the things he was obviously guilty of. It was bizarre. The gaslighting was overwhelming and exhausting. Being a woman of strong faith - it was hard for him to break my spirit. I am 7 yrs free now. I finally feel like I am coming back to my old self (confident). I hear the same things I suffered as I listen to this case. He was a ticking bomb. God rest her soul and may she receive vindication for what he did to her and the man she befriended.
Dr.Berry- so refreshing to hear your take!❤
1:35:15 He is a nightmare, chasing them in his Jeep. WOW - he didn’t want her to talk to anyone.
Catching up on this incredible case! So many red flags all along. Thanks for covering, Dr. Berry.
Very welcome! Thanks for watching!
Dr Berry, I love your channel. My daughter is a licensed therapist, so I can connect! He is one of the worst I have seen, so evil he should never be let out of prison, he is dangerous.
I personally hope the jury sees 1st degree M I think it was premeditated…especially for Ray
I am from Europe and we got used to the middle eastern mentality. As we have other gun laws he most likely would have taken a knife to the confrontation. Here they carry knives. I don't think he was about to shoot him for hitting on his ex but to be prepared if the confrontation would become somewhat physical. I don't know if that is the same kind of planning and I think here he most likely would get a punishment for murder out of passion. 🤔
The worse 🤔 NOT EVEN HIS DAUGHTER HELD HIM BACK.
I HOPE A BRIGHT 🙏 HAPPY LIFE FOR THEIR DAUGHTER 💕🙏💕
I was in a scary relationship, and the things he said to her were the same messages my ex gave to me, and he would break into my car and leave groceries…I was really scared, and I wasn’t taken seriously at all, but obviously he didn’t kill me, but I felt really stupid or silly for being so afraid of him. Someone like this-you can just never know how far they will go. 😢
Oh I just discovered this case and have been watching all the videos about it in the last few days including the verdict and I was waiting to see an analysis of this man. I discovered you! From Montreal, Canada. Thanks for the video!
Welcome 🙌🏾🙌🏾 this was a heavy case and I’m glad I was able to share here
@@DrPatriceBerry Super Heavy and as someone who started a personalized dating service here, I think it's important to start a community where I communicate comtent to my members and future members . You are providing analysis that can save lives ❤
@@DrPatriceBerry Thanks !
Thank you for your coverage. This was so interesting, I dated this guy in a different skin, it was so strange to watch Ali act like this and show me things I remember. I also had no idea BPD and NPD were often in relationships together. Thanks again.
“I’m incredibly biased.” ~ Dr Berry. Yeeeah, us, too, Doc. 😁. This _____ guy. Grrrr
His mom is my childhood friend. She used to live with me for months at a time as her mom would drop her off and disappear for months. Her mom married her off at 15 to a 39 year old man. She had Ali at 16. Their lives weren’t easy. No excuse, just saying.
Thanks for sharing this!
I think it is always good to know background. We can empathize and sympathize with the past without excusing the present.
Poor girl.
He says he didn't mean to do it. Here's what I think:
Either you are in control of yourself and you made a horrific choice. That makes you a danger to the world.
OR
You are NOT in control of yourself, and at any moment you could "snap" and kill someone in a fit of rage. That makes you a danger to the world.
Either way, he needs to be locked up for life. When free, this man is a menace.
When he’s asked about the relationship between his Mother & Father he wasn’t really able to give specifics. He gives very general responses about a tense and no doubt abusive environment between them but cannot be specific about any occasion where he significantly saw the impact this had on his Mother. Instead he puts himself in a role of comforting his siblings but provides no detail on how his Mother or siblings reacted or felt.
I’m not sure he is great at recognizing the thoughts and feelings of others and only sees things through his lens and experience (just my opinion)
Dark Triad +Meets Internet.=Ali
Today’s testimony was even worse!
@@DrPatriceBerry ooh I missed it! Thanks luv!😘
Thank you for covering this case!!!! Is this the most severe case of malignant narcissism you’ve ever seen? His anger really gets up there. What other underlying condition are you seeing @DrPatriceBerry???
He may have ADHD and trauma symptoms from childhood, however his personality traits are very clear in his testimony and court behavior.
@@DrPatriceBerry They most certainly are!!
This sounds very much like an honor killing. I say this based on another true crime story I saw not too long ago about a father who lost control of his two teenage daughters and he unalived them in the back of his taxi cab. It was soul wrenching because their mom had gotten them away but was convinced by the dad to bring them back.
Yup, honor killing is definitely the vibe it gave. Especially the way he yelled “my wife!” during the jail interview. He was shaking behind the glass, the way he was still angry smh he’s truly unhinged and consumed with control and entitlement.
quite the tap dancer, this one
I completely agree with your take, I can totally see the comparison to how he was acting to how his father was acting, but I also think that people like him end up treating their significant others in the way that they could not treat the people that hurt them. So I think a lot of the viciousness that he took out on her, was viciousness he couldn't show to the people that actually hurt him like his father. A lot of the things that he said to her were things he couldn't say to his parents I believe was part of the underlying issue behind what was going on with him and his, what I believe is the dark triad
That is a very fair point! Thanks for adding this! It is my understanding that his father was at closing statements.
What woman could respect a man who behaves this way with his entitlement and insecurities.
It’s charming in the beginning, the challenge to “change” him, that we have the power to do so, that life is a movie. By the time we realize it’s never going to happen, we’re in too deep.
I also think that he was likely charming and cunning at first. IMO The monster came out once he knew she was “hooked” 😞
From what I understand, that's the usual MO for abusers@@DrPatriceBerry
They'll love bomb until the abuser thinks they have them isolated enough to spring the trap. Their behavior changes very quickly after they move somewhere or get married. Just awful.
@@DrPatriceBerry That’s how it often happens. By then it’s too late. You hope and pray you can get out safely.
Love the soft spoken manner he’s trying to portray. He definitely planned to do this. His explanation of everything isn’t fooling anyone. Well maybe some 😅. His mom seems a bit off too. I see where he got it from.
I love that I found your channel! I was wondering if you think he has some traits of borderline due to his fear of abandonment?
Oh nevermind! I wasn't far enough in the video you explained it 😂
@@eimyA0419 thanks for watching 🙌🏾🙌🏾
It is not my perception, that the crying is an act. I am however not convinced he is crying because he feels remorse or guilt. He still feels justified. He might be crying because he thinks, she made him do it, and the consequences of that makes him cry.. or something. What do you guys think?
I think his feelings are genuine, and completely misguided.
I don’t think they are genuine at all. These people fake emotions to garner sympathy from others. So as I agree with you “he cries because he believes she made him do it” I feel that he does that to make people think that way. Not genuine and further manipulative.
He’s for sure acting. He is as found guilty today, and his reaction to the verdict was the first time I saw genuine emotion from him the whole trial.
i love your videos so much thank you for your work
Arabic word jinn is like a spirit or genie 🧞♀️ he called himself jinnkid…the word directly means “ to hide or to adapt.”
Thanks for adding this!
He made SUCH a mistake taking the stand in his own defence.
Agreed! It made things so much worse IMO
Great channel you have, thank you.!!
Thanks for watching 🙌🏾
Right, victim blaming
He is a narcissistic monster! Terrifying...he must be kept away from the rest of us! Peace.
I felt like it was a performance! 100%
I agree with you!!
I wonder if his conviction will be thrown out in the future because of his lack of defense?
As a borderline who is in recovery for that and I also have 13+ years clean and sober… I can’t imagine taking the white powdery stuff when I was anxious or angry. I suffer from an anxiety disorder and the thought of taking something that would exacerbate it makes no sense to me because absolutely nothing feels worse to me than uncontrollable anxiety. I only messed with the uppers to party and socialize, not to self medicate. That’s where the booze came in- mostly to sooth the anxiety. So I just don’t get the whole- we are having a freak out so let’s do something that makes it WORSE “logic”. the fact that he’s also clearly a narcissist means he likely suffers from an anxiety disorder too. So WHY do ppl self medicate with it?
I think for this individual, the adhd, he likely felt productive and creative while using. It can also be a way to escape (not an excuse just providing general info 🙌🏾)
I don't see a diagnosis of antisocial personality disorder as helping the defense since it essentially says there is a longterm pattern of criminality and exploitation.
AIie never TALK to Anna that day. He left her a message. She texted him back at 1030 saying she wanted him out of her life Forever. She knew nothing about what went on at the apartment until she got there at 2 o'clock.
She never lied to him. She never talked to him verbally. That's why he texted her after he did what he did and that's When she texted him Back. I want you out of my life Forever
The zooming on the eyes is to set focus, they may have been having an issue with the focus and needing to reset
Thanks for adding this! I wasn’t sure
@@DrPatriceBerry Thanks for doing the coverage of this one! I ended up watching all of his testimony after this
Greetings and love from South Korea❤
He had a full time job as well. But he was apparently been fired from that job prior to the murder
Jesus christ this is soo triggering, insane narcissistic, he should be locked up for life.
“Know what I mean”? No, Ali, I don’t. I’ve never felt that way in my entire life.
I want to add that after his jail interview and how disturbing it was, I thought that with time and sobriety that he would come back to reality. His testimony here, I feel like he thinks that this is all normal for people. It’s so not normal.
Exactly
"that's not fair" netiehr is killing your wife in a jealous rage.
why didnt his mother back up the stories about the whip with vacuum cord
He was convicted today, guilty of 1st degree murder… 2 counts. Sentencing will be next month. Had the nerve to be crying like a baby smh that was the only time during the trial that he showed any genuine emotion, when he heard guilty. His demeanor and tone during the testimony just shows that he still feels his actions were justified. He really thought she was his property and decided no one should “have” her if he couldn’t. Typical abuser smh
Closings are happening now, CTV is showing bits of it
Thanks so much! I will have to check it out!!
@DrPatriceBerry Check again around 6. Wednesday, they had 5 hours of testimony, and yesterday, the cross was on almost all afternoon
Is that the new term “ he unalived” rather than he killed ? lol
Him: “She’s terrible for not accepting me all loving after a bouquet of flowers eventhough yeah I cheated & abused her
Us: 💩
He's a juvenile who's performing for his High School audience!!
I would love your views on the Dan Markel Murder, paying attention to the Adelson family.
Here is my video on the Adelson family 🙌🏾 I saw that Charlie was moved after blaming a popular gang for Dan’s death “Psychologist Reviews Wendi Adelson's Testimony & Donna Adelson's Case”
ruclips.net/user/liveYJ2SE9SI1m4?feature=share
This definitely shows premeditation with him putting the iPad behind her bed you're right I can't believe his lawyer let him say this. It sounds like premeditation to me.
The jury agreed
This guy is trying so hard to justify his actions and put all the blame on his wife. He is such an actor. Can’t wait for prosecution to question him. It will be different I think.
Those videos are on court TV, the one from yesterday was very telling to me…he showed even more of his true self IMO. I covered part of the cross examination
What this is about is to figure out if it was a coldblooded murder or a crime out of passion.
@@oOIIIMIIIOo
Any fool knows it was a cold blooded premeditated murder!!!
So, I have ADHD and coke made me calm. I was able to stay up for a longer period of time, but I felt pretty calm, not wired. Made me see it as a pointless drug.
In the trial they said he was diagnosed with BPD (extremely rare in men), bipolar, and antisocial personality disorder.
Thanks for mentioning this! I didn’t see that testimony.
It was in the closing arguments. I could be mistaken, but that is what I recalled.
@@lisao6928 thanks! I haven’t watched closing statements just a brief overview.
Btw- They were speaking in court as if the affair actually had happened. I believe something came out in court that was not shown that she and Ray actually had been seeing each other. Obviously, it still gives him no right to do what he did. The prosecutor convinced me it was premeditated. She did a great job! I live in the San Diego area, wish I would've gone to see the trial in person!
@@lisao6928 thanks for adding this! I wish the whole trial had been streamed
This testimony so triggering to myself, who had a father who sounds very similar to his. And it makes me even more upset that people can do the work to make sure they don’t perpetuate the same violence. She owes him nothing. His feelings are his responsibility and his actions are his responsibility and in my opinion he is a man-child (sorry, I know it’s name calling but I feel like of all people he deserves it) and he sounds WORSE than his father because he took it to this level. Hurt people hurt people, and he had control of his path, and he chose not to get help to better himself. Even when testifying, he sees no fault in himself. It’s so upsetting. I appreciate you so much Dr for breaking this down. You were the voice that calmed me through listening to this testimony… thank you🤍
So glad my style was helpful! His behavior at the stand today was even more combative. I think the jury is seeing a glimpse of what Ana experienced 😞
This guy.....what a nightmare!
When you walk into the room with a gun in your hand you mean to use it! He beat her several times and she still wouldn't behave and she was moving on so he killed her.
So he work for the government as a IT Tex engineer. That’s why he had security clearance. They were both very intelligent as well as attractive
The judge overrules every objection from the prosecutor.
He startled me when he demonstrated how his dad would call his name. Chiiillle, I jumped like he did!😳
Yeah! It was intense! I’m sure he had a difficult childhood and then made some very poor choices along the way and didn’t get professional help. To me, him testifying was another attempt to control the narrative.
@DrPatriceBerry
It's actually quite pitiful that he doesn't have sense enough to know he's not running or controlling anything anymore but his own mouth.
Question for you out of curiosity: Have you ever seen someone at this level of pathology make significant long-term changes in their life to develop more self awareness and better behavior?
Also: I have friends in my life who have BPD and are all in therapy/seeking long term help. It sounds like people with NPD almost never do. They're both cluster B, but why is one more willing to seek out therapy than the other?
Someone with this level of pathology usually ends up incarcerated. I think Dr John from Hidden True crime (who is a forensic psychologist) talks about his work with individuals who have this level of psychopathy. I personally have seen it in children and adolescents in residential treatment or right before they went to treatment, their prognosis depended on this participation in services, family dynamics, and systemic changes/family change.
That other guy she was seeing is still in the military.
Thanks! I think he tried to smear his reputation on the stand to make himself (Ali) look better. I haven’t watched her ex’s testimony yet, I’m glad he showed up to talk about what he saw of Ali
@@DrPatriceBerryI watched some witness testimonies, but I didn’t see her ex. Do you know if he he ex’s testimony was posted and where?
It makes me angry. He blames her when she was alive and her grave.
He is a liar and cheat, therefore she is too!
why is he smiling?😭 1:00:24
Thank you for this analysis. Would you say he shows signs of malignant borderline personality disorder?
He had a psychological evaluation and the diagnoses that I could see as well based on the psych eval completed by Dr. Lehman are traits of narcissistic, borderline, and antisocial personality disorder and alcohol and stimulant abuse. He was also diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but I'm not sure if that was accurate since it was based on his self report and would be difficult to determine how much was due to his substance abuse.
Thank you for addressing this in the video!
Many lives broken including his own life, for nothing
I'm more curious about Ana and why she wasn't in fear of him especially after he trashed the apartment that very day. She know he had access to the apartment. The key card could have been deactivated or something. What was her psychology?
I think she loved him and may have been desensitized to his violence. Ali had ups and downs all the time (emotional dysregulation/tantrums) when he didn’t get his way.
I do love this prosecutor!! 😂😂😂😳
Superficial affect, yes acting. Dr Ramini is good but we all learn this in clinical psychology right?
So I went to school in the early 2000’s lol I hope things are better now. I never learned how to treat the victims of individuals with personality disorders/antagonistic partners…I’ve received specialized trauma training after graduation and do yearly continuing education on these topics
Please understand a chiropractor's expertise is limited only to cavitation. They cannot diagnose issues or treat anything, they can just crack your joints. If you suffer from pain, lethargy, or neurological issues--anything other than a kinklled neck, you need to seek the help of an actual doctor.
This sounds cult I ral on his Dada part and like Ali was carrying out an honor killing. Not that any of these are excuses but I thi k we are applying a US cultural norm on another culture, which isn't quite fair.
I would agree if he wasn’t trying so desperately to fit into American culture and he didn’t like the way his father behaved and treated the family. IMO Ali glamorized gangsters and wanted desperately to be loved and accepted. Just my thoughts 🙌🏾
@@DrPatriceBerry I actually disagree for 2 reasons. I think it is absolutely necessary and important to understand cultural norms from "the inside". It is necessary to study without imposing our judgment, but I still think we have the right, after study, to step back out and judge. Otherwise, nothing would ever change. Slavery would still be permissible, marital rape would be legal.
Also, complete cultural relativity ignores the fact that parts of a culture may be coercive so some people within the culture don't have a voice, power, or agency. Therefore voiceless members of the culture don't HAVE the ability to judge their own culture, they can't opt out, or have effective channels to communicate the need for change. Hope that makes sense.
BUT, I think if we are going to judge others, we need to listen with an open mind when others judge us also.
He wanted to fit in but is most likely unconciously programmed otherwise. A lot of two-cultured children have identity problems. And I agree american culture is somewhat different from overseas.
The guy murdered his wife and his wife's friend and he's so worried about his hairstyle and his clothes he's fixing himself all the time he's on trial for two murders like what do you care what you like look like fixing yourself like you're on stage or something the sky is narcissistic to the helt.
Total narcissist
I am still trying to figure out what his defense is.
His defense is that it was a crime of passion and not premeditated. I don’t think the jury is going to buy it, especially after yesterday’s cross examination
@@DrPatriceBerry I guess that might get him a few less years, but I would imagine still a substantial sentence.
Drugs and his abusive background made him do it.
It drives me crazy how he answers “sure” to the prosecutor. It’s like he he’s mocking her and what she’s asking is patently ridiculous. Funny how it’s completely the other way around lol. Such a complete and total narcissist
My daughter is 21 and dating a 24 year old guy who is so much like this guy it’s scary. I have three daughters and I’ve never worried about who they were dating till this one. Her boyfriend is Greek and a lot of times uses his culture as an excuse. I’ve never known Greek men to act like this guy. My daughter’s best friend since she was 9 is from Greece and she’s shocked by his behavior. Can you tell me how to help my daughter see how scary the situation is she’s in without pushing her closer or away from her family? Maybe give me some pointers are what I can say or something.
To give a few examples one night he wanted Taco Bell but he wasn’t working at the time so my daughter was worried about money. She told him they should eat at home. He called her a bitch and freaked out. After he does something like that he will act child like the next day and say how stupid he is and that he hates himself. The guys he says are his friends I met and they play hockey on the same time but they can barely stand him. They aren’t excited ever to see him. He causes trouble in all the friend groups. I could go on and on but basically this guy is so much like him it’s so scary. I’m worried about my daughter’s safety.
Dr. Ramani has great resources about antagonistic relationships. Wishing you and your family the best!
Ali is like a clone of my ex; it's so hard to leave. My breaking point was when I thought "if I have a daughter with this man, he's going to unalive me, & what is my baby going to go through" There was no way I put my child through a man/family like this. I told myself, if I'm sad when I'm around him I may as well be sad (& safe) w/o him. I told myself "he's dead to me" & that's how I treated it when I wanted to call him, nope can't he's dead. Corny but it worked. I hope the best for you and your daughter❤