Why is Dating in Portugal So Difficult?
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- This week I sit down with Leo, from the channel Portuguese with Leo to talk about all things Portugal, from the Portuguese culture, to the language, to the dating scene.. to whether Lisbon is worth it to move to these days?
Leo's channel: / @portuguesewithleo
Leo's Instagram: / portuguesewithleo
Each week I will interview guests from all around the world on the topics of culture, connection and of course, dating. The goal is to go as deep as possible and to really understand where we all come from and how much culture influences our life.
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I'm originally from Southern Italy, living in Portugal. Personally, I do like Portuguese dating. Men are extremely respectful, they do not make many compliments compared to Italians but they respect you and show their interest in different ways. No weird stares or harassment in the streets or at the beach unlike it happens in Italy. If all this is a consequence of Portuguese women's standards requirements, that's a positive aspect in my opinion.
Agree 💯
Lol.......this page is painting portuguese women as higher beings or something. Maybe portuguese guys are like you described, because that's how they are?
@@jeanjacqueslundi3502in fact if you read my comment I said that IF this is due to Portuguese women standards, that's a good thing, considering Portuguese women have been mentioned by the participants during the video. I didn't say that I'm sure this is a consequence of women's standards.
@@annait2119 Well it's not. I'm portuguese and it's inline with many other personality traits we have as a people outside of romance.
@@annait2119 This is not a consequence of portuguese women standards, but just the fact that we culturally are not very romantic as people and not much into love just like you in Italy. We are southern european people and latin ok, but in many aspects we have Nordic mentality. In fact if you talk with most people here they make fun of the word "amor" or "romântico" itself , meaning something ridiculous or backwards to them, or just have difficulties to say it, specially portuguese males . People here struggle a lot on dating or making friends because of extremely shy, individual, rude, non romantic behaviour. Remember that Portuguese people have the highest rate of using anti-depressants in Europe. That means a lot about portuguese shyness. By the way portuguese people at 30/40 are mostly single or divorced, or never dated anyone at all, again one of the highest rates in Europe. And guess why, one of the reasons is because of the males here that can not conquer females anymore. I'm not suprised why many people here, surch for partners abroad.
One thing that seems to have been left out of this conversation is that many portuguese women are simply not interested in taking part in the hookup culture. You mostly focused on the idea that portuguese women are fearful of judgement and less emancipated, as if one night stands and casual sex were signs of progress and freedom. Women are not wrong for not wanting to engage in that. They're also not wrong for wanting to get to know the guy first if they're into more casual stuff. I've heard so many men complain about this, both portuguese and foreign men. It just comes across as entitlement. Women don't owe you anything - and certainly not their bodies.
Well said! Bem dito!
As a Portuguese girl, I couldn't have said it better. The majority of us aren't simply interested in hookup culture, and it's not because of fear of judgment or lack of emancipation
@@carlasilva1774 it's beyond hook up culture, don't try to reduce it at it or make it like all others, pt and foreigners, are savages. Portuguese women have indeed village mentality and act they're the last cookie on earth
I am a man but agree:)
Completamente! Couldn't agree more with you.
Portuguese women respect themselves and aren't vulgar, they are honest and kind. Are people critizing a quality? Crazy people.
@@catym2443 there you go, acting like women from the rest of the world are vulgar. Perfectly reflect ithe village mentality everyone in PT and the rest of the world sees in PT women
Hahahahah camon this "respect themselves and aren't vulgar" is just to hide a very medieval and chauvinistic mentality. Everyone knows what Portuguese people do behind the scenes. You're the only one who believes on those bullshits.
Exatamente!
Portuguese women are everything but kind. They are usually super rude/arrogant to strangers
You can't blame Portuguese woman for testing a man's interest and intentions. This is a sign of strength. They know both their worth and what they want. They are ideal mates and partners dedicated to their partners and families. It's refreshing to see women who stand up for themselves unabashedly.
Depends who the guy is
"They know their worth and what they want" may be the biggest red flag. Run and don't look back
Thanks. Subscribe each word
@@bugra320 If it's a red flag for you being in the face of a woman who know what she wants, do yourself a favor so you won't wast time at tour "hunt" and you won't make the woman lose her time as well! If you want a submissive s3xdoll, good for you! What I think the most hypocrite thing is that some guys complain when women don't get 🛏️ easily, but if a woman want to hook up with you, you think that she's "too" easy! Pretty hypocrite and contradictory!
That's the biggest bs ever if the guy is handsome she doesn't care about anything else
Well done Portuguese women for not being easy
It depends if the guy is handsome
@@heldermonteiro2718 you must be 20 years old if you think being cute is all it takes.
@@olyalya6380 you need even more
Se o homem for rico, bonito, alto e com um bom estilo ele consegue qualquer mulher no mundo mesmo sendo um babac4, não me venha com essa
Whats the problem of being 'easy'?
I am Portuguese. I have 2 sisters, a dozen nieces, and several girl cousins. Big family. Portuguese women don't play hard to get and don't need men to put on a show. They are simply more selective in general. They want to at least get to know the name of the guy they spread their legs to. They don't like lazy lovers, and are usually not into wham, bam, thank you mam. They value men who know how to make a little bit of effort. It's about quality not quantity. It's not about just sex, it's about having self worth and gageing if a guy is decent enough. Listen, I am Portuguese, but I have lived in Sweden and now I live in the USA. I had 2 swedish boyfriends and also dated Finns, Danes, and Americans. I am no prude. But I asked some of them get an STD test before we got intimate and they agreed. I don't know where they have been, and I am not about to compromise my health with a total stranger. I was with a Swede for several years and I married an American. You have to be selective and do your thing, what's right and best for you. My American husband was glad that I wasn't easy. He was pretty used to easy women and I was different. So it can work. Not everyone is the same. Countries where it's common to be promiscuous have higher rates of unwanted pregnancies and STDs. Also, people are not happier and have better relationships just because they are shagging more strangers. It's very simple: do you. Whatever works for you, and you will meet like-minded people who are going to value the same, and if not, no problem. Next. Relationships in Portugal are not more complicated. Portuguese women are friendly and fun, but maybe just not in a hurry to get laid with everyone. They also prefer Portuguese men rather than foreign men, for a variety of reasons, ask them, but foreign men are not out of the question. It depends on what you are looking for.
I find a lot of men saying women are being difficult/ playing hard to get, just mean they're not giving themselves to them easy.
Women have every right to be fussy.. many of us have found out the hard way what happens when you're not..
@@kerryh3833Right and no doubt those same men complain about women being: “run through”. Even though they create that “problem” at the same time.
I love Portugal.
Why should men make an effort and women NOT make any effort? That makes no sense at all.
@@pedrosa9283 Women make an effort by dressing up and looking good. A man's testosterone goes up in the presence of a woman he is attracted to. His social capital and status are elevated when seen with a woman. Her mere presence is enough for that to happen.
You'd hate it if a woman showed up on a date with jeans and t-shirt, hair in a messy bun. You'd think that she hasn't made an effort.
The kind of effort you don't even bother to acknowledge.
This episode was the best episode ever Marina 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👌🏼
Leo is amazing at explaining things and reasoning them. I really enjoyed it. I think that you should definitely invite him again to talk further about the Portuguese culture and differences between people & the accent differences in Lisbon and Porto 😊🇵🇹♥️
Happy you liked it!
As a Portuguese women I am not into hook ups or one night stands and I take my relationships seriously… it’s not about being picky, we have standards, we have respect for our family’s opinion, we’re also very prudent, careful and trust is a big issue!
Nobody realizes this or say this. Portugal when it default its debt in 2008 it became for sale internationally, probably as a compensation for getting helped.
The government sold most it's companies and assets cheap during the crise forced by the IMF. For example Portugal is the only country in OCDE that owes 0% of its electric company EDP, It was sold part to the Chinese state electric. Prices dumped including real estate. During those years, foreign investment attacked our cheap real estate, and the next years also. Portugal in general was desperate and needed capital, it sold it self. Some Portuguese are really happy, the few ones that have had a lot of proprieties all this years, old rich families mostly.
Center of Lisbon and Porto lost it's essence and became a Disneyland for outsiders, tourists, digital nomads or stupid healthy with no idea about the world
Generalization is useful, but has always a lot of problems in this kind of things. "It depends" is very true, even in a small country. Different places, different mentalities, even in a small country like Portugal. To me, the "difficulty" of portuguese women should be the default and not the "fast food" mentality in many countries, such as the US, where everything has to be quick and not durable. The ones who really complaint, are the "players" who want "easy girls" who they can convince to like them with less effort.
Yes and no. Portuguese girls can be difficutly for the WRONG reasons.....not just being "cautious" or wanting long term commitment (which makes them sound like super noble angelic beings). I'm portuguese and only ever dated foreigners, and am as far from a player as possible. But "just being me" in Portugal, in a context with girls........seems to create defensiveness whereas it doesn't in any other country I've been in (and I've been to quite a few in the so-called western world). There's a closedoffness that is not the same as being cautious or selective in many portuguese women. In fact, I have found girls that said years after they kinda liked me......when in the past gave me a looot of "no-no" signals. No physical or romantic advances mind you......only ever normal interaction.
@@jeanjacqueslundi3502 Tá calado, não há ser mais choninhas que o homem português pqp
It's a good idea not to generalize. Period.
but there are also women with the mentality fast food and no problem if they are happy with that....subject and video without interess...
I don't get this idea that having casual s*x with someone you barely know is somewhat progressive and liberating for us modern women, I am not risking my health, self-worth and personal safety for that, no thank you!
Why would casual sex damage your self-worth? Come on!!!!
@@pedrosa9283For example if you got rap@ed. Or if the guy doesn’t respect you!
@@analuisabastossousa1are you REALLY saying that casual sex and rape are the same thing?
REALLY??????????
And as if casual sex would mean lack of respect. As if. Who goes after that narrative must be a REALLY conservative person!
@@pedrosa9283 I have 2 friends that happened that! That’s why I said something!
Here's a controversial comment:
I think some people in the comments are confusing "high-standards" with "pickiness" and "entitlement". So to people saying that it's good that portuguese women have high standards and don't just accept anything, here's my take on it ( as a portuguese guy ) :
I know that I'm an average-to-good looking guy and I'm groomed and I am a hard-worker and have a nice career. I know from outside sources that even though I tend to be a bit shy at first, I'm outgoing, kind, chill and I know how to keep an interesting and deep conversation, especially because I love to ask questions and listen to the other person talking about herself.
Now here's my experience of about 20 years in dating:
90% of the times that I've tried reaching out to portuguese women, I got the "whatever" looks and some of them even spoke angrily to me. I got despised, shamed and humiliated many times.
Now here's the real kicker:
The arrogant entitled A-Holes with looks and personalities that seem to have come out of reality shows are the ones who most of these girls go for, only to get dumped or cheated on in a few months' time. I won't lie... that took a toll on my self-esteem.
And also from experience, the women who actually get nice, honest, serious guys tend to take them for granted after a while and not appreciate what they have at all and are constantly making comparisons with other men; the only time they actually value their man is when they leave them.
Where's the "quality" in that? Where are the "high-standards"?
Fast-forward a few years and I'm dating a girl who is gorgeous, funny, kind, down-to-earth, humble and with a life story that could send many people into deep depression. She never played "hard-to-get" with me. And you know what...? At first, I thought that something must definitely be wrong with her, because there was no way this girl could like me if I got rejected so many times by girls that, at least from my perspective, were not as interesting as her. Turns out that she's one of the rare women that I got to meet that actually was "picky" for the reasons being stated in the comments, that is, not because she wanted a "Brad-Pitt" looking guy, but because, from her dating experience, she wanted someone that's humble, honest and kind as well.
Want another story?
My sister is extremely good-looking and with an excellent personality. And you know what? For some time, she was also playing hard-to-get...
......And SHE ADMITS that she was being an IDIOT. It was not until she changed her "standards" that she finally found a guy that she really loves and with whom she's been with for 5 years and she doesn't imagine herself with anyone else.
I'm not saying that there aren't women in Portugal that are "picky" for the right reasons and I'm not saying that there aren't guys who just want to play; as stated previously, I know that there are. But I AM saying that, from my experience, the dating scene is stupidly and unnecessarily hard and that most girls are DEFINITELY ENTITLED.
@@blazept567 Good to hear a perspective from a Portuguese fella to better understand what is going on...
So what you are basically saying is that they are not that different from the trend that is going on in most occidental countries where women are attracted to bad boys, confusing " being hard to get" with entitlement and "knowing what they want" with wanting what they are told to want by the latest trend on how men should look like and approach.. Apart from being prudish and too serious to be around.
I am glad you have found a great woman to love and be loved back, well deserved. Depending on the culture they are more rare but they always exist. Peace man ✌🏻
Also, think that only dating through meeting a friend of a friend makes it hard for those that don't have that many connections.
@@Misstanakasan That's definitely me.
I have the opposite experience, I was lenient and very cool with my partners. Not clingy and always accommodating to my nice guy, now my ex-husband. Now I refuse to settle, I prefer to be alone than to settle for someone that won’t add to my life.
Also, Portuguese male egos are horrible - God forbid if I mentioned that I made more money than him… In the end of the day, it’s all about connection and you don’t get to find that with hookups and ONS
@@sofiapatricio2257you will be surprised if you try. Sometimes you have more connection with an one-night stand than with a friend with benefits, at least.
Tenho orgulho em ser portuguesa! 🇵🇹❤
It's sad that in XXI century people still say things like "women a or b are hard to get"! Women aren't consumption goods, so you don't"get" a woman, like you get a beer or your rent a boat: women are people, with free will and we get laid if we want and with who we want! That idea that guys have to do this or that for a woman to date them is really creepy: if we don't want, we don't, and it's kind of stalking, for a guy to insist! Because women nowadays don't need to pretend they aren't interested so they won't be called "easy", nowadays if a woman says she doesn't want to go out with a guy, probably she doesn't want and that's that! Men don't need to or shouldn't try to "convince" women to do anything because it's very patronizing, like if we didn't know what we want! Get a grip! If guys stop being obnoxious and stop the hunting and just get along and see what happens, that would be way better!!!
That’s actually what the book ‘The Menu: Life without the opposie sex’ (A.Clarey) describes. Sad, but true ..
@@YanVermeer I don't know who this person is. It's sad that women won't go to bed with every guy the meet?! I think that what's sad is using the other person as a s3x toy, because that's what it happens when people go to bed with someone they don't know. I don't know why some people view women who don't go to bed just because as bad people of cold and guys who want to go to bed with every women they see as lovely and nice! It's way more common for casual s3x to end with a women texting the guy and he doesn't reply than the other way around! Why is a woman cold because she refuses a guy she isn't interested in and a guy who, after he gets what he wants, he ghosts her, isn't cold, as well?! There's not a good vs bad: women have the right to have high standards and men should have, as well.
@@vervideosgiros1156 Hi Vervideosgiros ;-) alright, so...Aaron Clarey is a very interesting author who in this book explains that women became less and less interested in men during the last decades (this can be statistically proven, read his previous book The Book of Numbers). This came so for several reasons (feminism, entering the workforce etc etc) Therefore he advises men to pursue their own hobbies and passions, like hiking, biking, playing music, hanging out with male friends. And if eventually a woman/girl likes him and want to have a relationship with him, good, fine. But sadly women simply don´t like men that much (they love their own hobbies and work and friends more then a relationship with a man), which is also a danger for the continuation of the human species .....
@@vervideosgiros1156 I guess there are so many points of views in this discussion that has actually become a false dilema. Many man are looking for a loving partner, many are not, so what? I guess for women is the same.
This thing about language if I got you right, is just so superficial , our primitive and wild senses are not a sin, it is a great asset to exist between 2 people who love each other. To polarise keeps the desire and the fire burning life long in a healthy way. You people are getting more prudish then the Vatican in the times of Inquisition. Chill out, if you dont like to have a bit of the wild side you can turn into a robot and move to the countries were man are already emasculated and women have partners that are man but could as well be a woman as he does not do anything different from them.
The simple difference between not being interested in someone and not being interested in anyone by default. The simple difference between not being interested in someone and refusing totally to talk to strangers and meet them.😊
women who respect themselves live like this. there is nothing wrong with that, it is a good thing. not that speeding through the bases is bad or shameful but if you want more than a hook up and dont want to hook up on the way to getting that, men shouldn't complain about that beacuse in the end these are the girls they marry
Yep, such hypocrites.
They start att 33:23 the dating scene
The average man worldwide is having a hard time finding love and are more open to potentially finding love elsewhere even if it in a different country
Hi VJAG214, this book of Aaron Clarey: The Menu, Life without the Opposite Sex, explains it all: For all of human history men and women came together to form families. It may have been common, it may have been routine, but that is what they did. Generation after generation, for all of human history, men and women formed families.
That is until now.
Because with advances in technology, incredible economic growth, a generous welfare state, and the political movement of feminism, men and women no longer need each other in order to survive. And as much as we'd like to deny it, when given the choice, men and women are empirically and increasingly choosing to be alone. By 2030 45% of marriage-age women are forecasted to be single, rendering a same percent of men equally so. 70% of both men and women are overweight, indicating little serious interest in attracting a mate. Marriage ranks 5th place on women's priority list. And 1 in 3 marrying-age men live with their parents. And all that with crippling college debt that makes having a family a luxury most will never afford.
Not all hope is lost as Clarey offers a wide menu of options of options to fill the purpose/hope vacuum. The need to maintain good health, hobbies, friends, travel and an occasional hook up gives you purpose while avoiding the snare trap of a life wrecking marriage.
Thank you for not generalizing Brazilian people, I'm a Brazilian and we don't like this generalization (I think nobody likes it) and we have a lot of "conservative" people in Brazil too.
But besides that, Leo was very elegant in the way he approached the questions, very much appreciated.
@@alessandroalmeida2102 true! He was very sensable. That is what you get from an intelligent person.
The fact the Portuguese leave some vowels out when they pronounce some words, especially the ending vowels give you a better accent when you speak English. As a Brazilian, I know how hard it is for us to leave those ending vowels behind in English, in fact, the last syllables behind. We tend to drag the words towards the last syllables. We are not as bad as the Italians, but accent is accent ☺
It is true, despite the fact that Brazilian Portuguese is beautiful.
I just feel sad that there is so much disdain of Brazilians towards the Portuguese accent from Portugal.
It was not hard for me at all, as a Brazilian...
I'm a Portuguese (26yo man). What I absolutely hate about my country in dating is the need for "connections" in dating. That is, You are supposed to be "recommended" by the woman friends.
From my viewpoint, since the female friends I have are living far from me, I really struggle to meet any Portuguese woman. When I ask some girls how did they met their boyfriend more often than not they answer: "you see, there was a friend of mine who invinted X...". Fortunately, here in Algarve there are many people from abroad and I was fortunate to date a very sweet loving girl from Ukraine.
Comparing both I would say that the PT EXES I've dated were stupidly hard to start a relationship, but very immature and childish once in a relationship. The Ukranian EX was hard, but not as much , and was very sweet, dignified and serious about the relationship from the beggining till its end.
Edited for typos.
So who said that Portuguese women don't marry foreigners?
You are only a young adult you must learn about life
This was so eye opening. I went to Portugal twice and loved the country, but I felt people are reserved and very slow. My dating experience with a Portuguese abroad was not the best, but now I understand what he meant when he said he doesn't date Portuguese women. Because he was lazy and low effort. I also get now the reserved and quiet culture. Portugal is leading with a 97% divorce rate in Europe. Maybe someone should go there and teach the guys how to treat women!!
Where did you get those stats from? And where are you from and where in Portugal did you live?
97%? You do believe everything you see and read in the internet, don´t you? You honestly believe that every marriage in Portugal ends
@@PauloSantos-zi3es she also believes that we're quiet and reserved. Compared to who?! My group of friends are anything but "quiet and reserved". Stereotyping a group of over 10 million people makes no sense at all.
Portuguese women are indeed difficult, but if the man is financially successful or even famous, they put their difficulties in dating aside very easily. I do not write this as a condemnation, but as an observation.
What I really mean is that when a Portuguese woman is REALLY interested in the first date, you as a man will really achieve your goals on that first date.
Not all Portuguese women… you may be a millionaire but if you’re a prick… you won’t have much luck
Leo is a great example of: “how to say you’re a playa without saying you’re a playa”. He just wants the easy availability of casual sex from Portuguese women as well as foreign women, but when he wants to get married he will disparage and ignore the kind of women he used to pump and dump and then complain about the lack of “wife material” out there. Typical hypocrisy.
At 53:00 he thinks that women go to the club for the same reason men do; to find boyfriends or one night stands. It’s men who go to the club to do that (well ONS - look at gay clubs for a more heightened example).
Women go to the club to dance and have fun with their friends mainly. This is why women often get in free or at a reduced rate; men won’t go otherwise, but women still will. So a Portuguese woman who is suspicious of men in clubs has every right to be, because their motivations are different. Portuguese women are right to find potential partners through family and friends and to be a bit more reserved. Women should vet more and I admire Portuguese women for having standards.
Woman go for the male attention
Don't be that prejudiced PLEASE. "AI UI woman never go after sex AI UI" - Frase mais machista do dia, pelo menos.
I appreciate Leo's intelligence. Mans is smart and looks at all the angles.
Shout out to Portuguese women for being smart with their sexuality. Yes! Test a man first!!
PT men: start testing a woman first. Now!
@@pedrosa9283 yes indeed! But for the ladies as well!
Brazilian married to an American lived in Portugal for 6 years, very old mentality in general, for me it wouldn't work I'm Christian and I don't drink or smoke or do drugs or sex out of marriage, I like waterfalls not the beach, I wouldn't talk about Brazil unless you lived there 😅😅 and Portugese women are super right for withholding their bodies for the right person, we are not objects, the bohemian life also never got my attention, I rather go hiking and running and fishing my husband is also Christian no addictions and took me serious from day 1, not all Brazilian girls are whores you just have to go to the right places to meet good people and with better values, I wouldn't date Portuguese men because they see all "ALL" Brazilian women as "for fun" tag on it, and they don't help at home with the chores very attached to their mom's everything is their mom.
A couple of things: I'm a portuguese man and I prefer brazilian girls both for casual and serious dating. They are usually more fun and energetic than portuguese women and I love it. In regards to the "withholding their bodies for the right person", that might be even more rare in Portugal than in Brazil. Sure... they avoid casual sex, but as long as someone is considered her "boyfriend", sex will happen close to 100% of the times. Saving yourself for marriage in Portugal is unfortunally seen as weird and shamed upon.
Congrats. You just showed your thoughts about "ALL" portuguese men, even though you are married and christian, you had to make it a point for everyone to know.
Portuguese woman are simply more disconnected from their mating side.
They are not always having that in mind like the Portuguese men.
Spanish girls are much more connected, they are more often checking for potential mates.
The difference is quiet intriguing.
Never thought about it that way, but you may have a point
?! based on what u are said it?? there are all kind of women in Portugal....come on we live in 2024......maybe in your personnal life you only experienced that...
Why wouldn't you want to wait a few dates before being intimate? I think thats respectable
Fun fact. The bigger the emocional connexion , the wilder the pleasure.
Why should you wait by default or prejudice when you want to be intimate? It just makes NO sense.
Everybody should wait until marriage
@@lucasrodrigues9766 I am also against sex before marriage. It delays the wedding ceremony.
36:50 - if I have anything to say to portuguese women, forget the external judgment, be rational egoist and remain difficult.
They are! You have to conquer the women here and they don't go with the first guy who saw in a party
Se é inverno não acho que a temperatura dentro de casa deva ser tão elevada que possamos andar em t shirt. Pensem no ambiente. De facto as casas são mal isoladas, mas 20° C é bom
Concordo plenamente. Sempre me fez confusão ver nos filmes/ series americanas cenas de estar a nevar na rua e alguém abrir a porta de casa de t-shirt manga cava e cuecas 😂 nós estamos habituados se é inverno vestimos de acordo com isso mesmo dentro de casa.
I think Leo has too much of a Lisboner perspective. Of course fado doesn't really represent Portuguese culture, only Lisbon and Coimbra have proper fado houses. There are many similar styles to fado worlwide, be it blues in the US or sevdah in Bosnia, and local musical elements play higher importance in many Portuguese cities when compared to fado. Fado only got its nationwide appraisal with Amália, this being some 60 years ago! No lifelong or centenary thing. However, I do like fado as I have a fado loving grandmother which passed that love on to me. By the way, Portuguese do tend to be more reserved than Spanish but there are some Portuguese, especially from Porto and neighbouring cities, that can be quite loud. Just enter Bolhão Market to see that...
Women are not easy because they are also Christian .. so have respect for their family values
It seems his perspective was less on why dating is hard, and more on why casual sex is harder depending on the background of the woman. If I’m honest I left this feeling, I’d better stay away from Portuguese guys, if I want something real.
Yes because you have no discernment to understand a random portuguese guy on a podcast....is just a random portuguese guy on a podcast. He wasn't democratically elected by us "portuguese people" to be a spokesperson.
@@jeanjacqueslundi3502But why not consider him a representative of Portuguese men? I mean he has no problem putting all Portuguese women in the same box. He’s just another playa.
@@toomuchinformation Why not? Because he is one person. I'm a portuguese guy too btw. So if you conisder me a representative, my opinion holds as much weight as his :)
I'm portuguese, I never dated any foreigners, but at this point I'd be a lot more open to date foreigners (as long as they come from a similar culture, western mostly) than portuguese men. They are looking for easy women to use and discard, in general.
@@MariaMedina-lj4kt All men are like that
Eu sou português, and this video is pure bushit. Women care how you take care about yourself its not hard to date.
Now about the inflacition, its gone crazy way to expensive to live here
Thank you! Tired of hearing men blame women as being hard to get for their bad dating skills or lack of good personality
It is 100% is hard to date. You just didn't have any experience with girls from/in other countries
Portuguese people are enough of turists and nomad ..., we dont have place to stay.we lost our homes.myself i work a lot all my life in my country and loosing my rented home to landloee son, never be able to find another home in the income i have.terrible, pls dont came to portugal, we are full
I can see how people can confuse politeness with being formal/informal. Usually the countries that are formal that tend to use it as a synonim... but for me real politeness serves only to make people feel confortable in a place or situation.
With formality we give people space by distancing ourselves from them and respecting hierarchic rules.
And informality, on the other hand, is when we take a more friendly aproach by being closer and making an instant connection.
I guess on the matter of formality it depends on what people preffer on that moment in time and space.
Because as for being rude, in my conception, is more about your attitude.
One can be rude by being overly formal and at the same time rispid and showing disdain or by being overly informal taking some liberty disrespectfully.
Sunshine makes you friendly.
arabs would be the most friendly people then
*looks at murder rates by region* hmmm
@@avneeshluthra5803Arabs and dangerous.
Oh my God I built my entire life to be with a Portugal boyfriend but now I don't know what to do
@@cupidok2768it's strange you would have that as an ultimate goal. There's all kinds of people anywhere
The reason why we started using subtitles is that it is way more economical than dubbing. I was born in the 70s and back then we used to get POLSAT, a polish TV channel from communist Poland. Everything was dubbed.... by the same guy. He dubbed, men, women and children. It was horrible. We, on the other way, had a guy typing on a keyboard...
Most people don't learn any language at scholl? Excuse me??? I learned French and English, same my kids, same all people I know...in Portugal...
Lisbon is not portuguese anymore. Like the rest of the West European capitals
Mesmo assim o nosso inglês é melhor doque o dos espanhóis ou italianos
About water temperature: in Algarve in Tavira there is warmer water.. even sometimes near Lisbon beach there is nice twmperature….
That's so funny that the ocean was mentioned. I cannot stand cold water!! But for whatever reason, when I go back home to Portugal, it doesn't feel cold to me. I dive in and love every second. I don't know why! 😂
I'm glad for Portuguese woman
I'm going to nitpick here. In Latin America we can be very formal. In Mexico you don't talk to service people or to strangers in general in an informal manner. Guatemalans think Mexicans are rude, and Spaniards think Mexicans are overly formal and polite.
Madrid is 5 times more than Lisbon and people are still open. It has nothing to do with the size of the city but with the culture of the city.
Much more. Portuguese are very pessimistic and introvert people. No sexual desire
Dude for sure. People in Porto are way open minded then ppl is lisbon. Girls in lisbon loveeees beta males
You missed the point.
It's interesting how some men prefer to be hypocrites than to say that they actually don't want to put in much effort when it comes to dating, that they prefer it easy... But instead, they blame women who have some standards or who are simply not interested in hooking up with just about anybody. Just be honest, no one is gonna judge you, thankfully there's someone out there for all of us. Or just move to Germany/Sweden, since he said that women are so "emancipated" there. 😅
Two days ago the ocean water was great in algarve's Portimão, it was hot out too, that helped 😎
This guy seems very polite and respectful. BUT…. We cannot underestimate the role the history. Brazil is an ex colony of Portugal and that the relationship with the two were highly hierarchical and full of prejudice. Not mentioning it when explaining how Portuguese men see Brazilian women is far from fair.
The “spanish” more portuguese alike are by far the basques (not counting Galicia n galicians because those are… us, one of us!!!)
Not sure if anyone already said this, but in Romania us in our 30's learnt english the same way. We had cartoon network just in english without any dubbing or subtitles 😄
Well...don't forget this is their opinion....women and men are humans and in Portugal, as in other countries, there are all of kind, with all of behaviours....it's difficult to talk about this subject without doing generalization....
I'm Portuguese (Gen X).
Regarding Portuguese people English proficiency i don't totally agree with what was said.
Exposure sure, but i remember quite well the words of my English teachers in the 90s saying that if we (the students) didn't learn English we would be considered illiterates in the future.
Also, i know a few people that didn't put the effort to learn (even millennials collage graduates) and can't speak English today.
So, exposure to American English helps, but it only helps to reduce the learning curve.
I wasn't even subscribed but the algorithms figured I needed to hear this chat 😅
Only 2k Subscribers.... whatever happened to the original channel? 🧐
Insightful chat though 👍
no comments about dating portuguese men. do you assume a male only audience? or women shouldnt talk about dating from their perspective?
Well Leo is a man so he doesn't have any experience with dating other men. If he did, I would ask him about that. Each Podcast has a different theme. Some are just about dating men from X culture.
@@datingbeyondborderscast A very homophobic comment. 😡 Not all men date women. I'm a man and I'm dating another man.
@@datingbeyondborderscast Not all men date women. I'm a man and I'm dating another men.
in this extremely liberal world that Portuguese trait became a blessing in disguise
It's interesting to get into the psyche of men mentally categorizing women as "hard/not hard to get". Whereas I as a bi woman, when I think about dating people outside my country/culture, I think more in terms of "this culture is more similar/different than mine" which would make me perceive communication as more/less difficult or what's assumed as commonplace in dating clearer/less clear.
Anyway. This is not a personal attack against Leo. I like his channel, he tried to give nuanced answers, and he seems quite intelligent, but it's just another example of (some/most) men not seeing women as people, just as "women", different category outside of person. It makes you think.
The standard of demands is higher for Portuguese women in general in the Western world, which gives Portuguese men a competitive advantage when dealing with foreign women, pinuts. :)
Cities in hills were best to defend from foreign military invasions!!!
I listen to Leo’s podcasts in portuguese to learn the language, but it was also interesting listen to him without any language purposes ❤
Leo's english is very very good
Are you here to judge it? That's the Portuguese mentality. I'm Portuguese and I am here to listen to the content.
Im Portuguese and there’s definitely woman that want one night stands it depends from woman to woman
What's the definition of "conservative"? Is that really a huge difference between getting laid on the first date or on the third date? 🤔
@@michaelr2454 Yes there is, you follow a rule? 🤣
I'm portuguese and didn't think dating was different outside Portugal. I think we just have standards and respect for ourselves thought it would be the same in other places except like the US and Brazil
Yes like first invite to a dinner or a cofee. Its respect for women and more easy to conect and bith have a great experience. Then if you are conected and happy both can have better relationships romance or friends
We are poliglots since ever !! We lurn language since little.we dont have translation of films, tv translated to portuguese, never, cartons are in english.we saw everything in original languages.wen i was a little girl i saw many movies in frensh, we love frensh movie!! Frensh actors.we prefer english language feom England, not from USA
27:00 - we didn't think we didn't have founds to double to our language, it didn't even come to our mind. We thought it was normal to read subtitles. I remember when I learnt to read and I was reading kind of slow, I got frustrated many times the first year and then I got used to read it. I also like to read subtitles and then read from the lips, I hate when things aren't in original language. Ok, I'm not Portuguese but Slovenian but in Slavic countries we have the same case.
The only thing that was dubbed was cartoons. So people who had money and had more programs (english ones and so on) were watching in English, the rest in native langauge, Slovenian. So I kind of started to learn English when I was able to read (subtitles) - being 7 years old.
Portugal is hell for dating… for Portuguese people of course.
I really enjoyed this conversation ☺️
Deviam falar de homens portugueses que têm pouca motivação, dificuldade para abordar uma mulher e raramente procuram algo sério até aos 30.
Para além de que os portugueses ao emigrarem tanto atrasam ter uma relacionamento estável e duradouro muito mais, depois dos 20s, o que é seriamente mau.
Finalmente alguem diz uma coisa acertada e em bom português. Totalmente de acordo. Muito triste o que está a acontecer. Eu estou com a mesma dificuldade aos 37 anos e pelos vistos assim vou continuar a não ser que mude de país, algum onde os homens sejam de facto mais romanticos , disponiveis e receptivos com as mulheres do que o nosso . Parecem uns putos mimados, umas criancinhas autenticas sem tomates nenhuns nem coragem para conquistar mulheres. Nunca sabem o que querem, andam confusos, não têm paciência nenhuma para as dificuldades da vida, paciência nenhuma para ouvir uma mulher, arranjam a desculpa do trabalho e do cansaço, do futebol e das festas com os amigos, para não quererem estar com a companheira, namorada, ou esposa, nunca têm vontade nenhuma para nada, nem ambições nenhumas. Só lhes interessa fazer a vontade deles proprios, ignorando e desprezando totalmente a vontade da mulher que têm ao lado. Não sabem dar o primeiro passo. Hoje em dia até somos nós a ter que ir atrás deles, coisa impensavel no tempo dos meus pais e avós.
Esses que emigram, já não querem nada com portuguesas infelizmente. Estabeleceram e refizeram a vida noutro país com mulheres desses países.
@@anna-uc4tqsempre me foi ensinado que nunca nenhuma mulher vai atrás de um homem, seja feia, bonita, alta, baixa, seja o que for. Eles com esta atitude ficam ainda mais preguiçosos.
@@rir79 Claro que não, eu não vou de certeza, jamais, seria rebaixar-me como mulher, mas ao mesmo tempo é por isso que continuo solteira, pela tal situação que expliquei atrás. Apenas disse, porque sei que hoje em dia infelizmente é cada vez mais assim, os papeis estão todos invertidos, em uma grande responsabilidade desse comportamento nos homens é das mulheres, sobretudo as feministas.
@@anna-uc4tq se um homem deixa de fazer as suas tarefas vais culpar feministas por isso? Isso não faz qualquer sentido. Os homens têm de começar a ser homens e feministas não odeiam homens, há várias escolas e a maioria nem quer substituir homens, antes pelo contrário, só os querem é a fazer o papel deles para não termos de ser nós a trabalhar naquilo que é papel deles. Um homem é um homem e uma mulher, uma mulher. Papéis diferentes e que não se deviam substituir mas ser interdependentes. Voltamos ao mesmo, as mulheres em vez de atribuírem responsabilidades a quem não faz o que deve, atiram o dedo a outras mulheres. Se um homem não quer ser pai, abandonará, mais cedo ou mais tarde, a família. E a responsabilidade não é da mulher que ele abandona, é dele…. De resto, percebi que não te irias rebaixar e fazes bem, e se estás sozinha, não ligues, não vais querer é alguém que não te acrescenta nada. Fica bem e tudo de bom.
portuguese men takes ages to make a move so I dont blame the girls
I am not a Portuguese woman, but nowadays it seems as if you have to offer the whole package (sun, low taxes, speak English and easy sex) for tourists and digital nomads, in order to visit or live in the country. :)
POIS HÁ MUITOS COMPRADORES
PARA KIT PORTUGUÊS
MAS APESAR DAS APARÊNCIAS
PORTUGAL NÃO ESTÁ A VENDA
I´m a Portuguese woman, and yes it´s like that and it´s annoying
As a Brit who used yo holiday in Cornwall every year, i can relate to slending all day in the cold atlantic sea as a kid, and not reacting 😅
Um vídeo com bastantes coisas boas, que acaba por perder devido a opiniões meramente pessoais e por afirmar falsidades óbvias.
O sistema de ensino português permite a escolha e o ensino de várias línguas estrangeiras, sendo que o inglês é, ou pode ser, aprendido desde o 1° ciclo do ensino básico.
Só para citar um exemplo.
Try at least to say obrigado, bom dia , boa tarde, boa noite, as we speak english easely, even frensh and spanish
Bom vídeo, parabéns.
No entanto tenho que fazer um reparo! Como é que convidas alguém para uma entrevista sobre Portugal que tem uma influência hispânica tão forte como ele?! Ele próprio admitiu que a mãe é da Argentina e que foi lá muita vez. Isto faz com que eu faça a seguinte análise ( será curta ) : Um português que afirma que o fado é apenas uma forma de publicidade, é porque não é português! Fim da análise.
Eu como português de gema, tendo nos meus genes ( por estudo da árvore genealógica da minha família paterna ) os genes de um Capitão de uma das Naus que fizeram o caminho marítimo para a Índia na comitiva do Vasco da Gama. Digo sem qualquer tipo de pudor , que o seu entrevistado não tem qualificação, paixão, nem conhecimento suficiente sobre a cultura única de Portugal.
P.S. Da próxima vez que queira falar sobre Portugal, convide um português.
Tenho dito.
Ass: Aldo Leandro
O canal é em inglês. Tu escreves em Português. Achas que és mais qualificado para ser entrevistado pelo teu pedigree?
Vais dizer: ah mas eu não me referia a mim mas a outro com mais qualificações.
Então, que interessa a tua linhagem aqui?
Para se ter o direito a ser português, nascido em Portugal e filho de português, mesmo assim é necessário uma árvore genealógica da nobreza? 🤔
@@joaochainhonunes Não precisas te ofender, factos são factos. E para mim um português que diz que o fado é apenas um meio publicitário, é porque não percebe nada do que é ser português e nem da cultura de Portugal. E sim sou muito mais qualificado do que ele para falar sobre a cultura do meu país! Ignorância não tem desculpa.
Tenho dito!
@@aldoleandro9391nada ofendido, amigo.
É apenas arrogância da tua parte. Arrogas auto-certificação das tuas próprias qualidades. Falas sobre cultura do NOSSO país; no entanto faz parte da nossa cultura sermos humildes e demonstrar o nosso valor através de feitos e não de arrogância. Tens algum canal no RUclips, onde já tenhas demonstrado internacionalmente o teu valor? Se não, que provas dadas tens?
Quanto ao fado, prefiro cante alentejano.
@@joaochainhonunes Caro amigo. No meu entender, arrogância é falar sobre o que não se sabe para todo o mundo ver e ficar com uma ideia errada sobre o fado. Foi a única coisa a que me referi. O assunto do vídeo são as mulheres portuguesas e a forma como se comportam.
Se achas que ele teve razão sobre o que disse em relação ao fado e como é interpretado em Portugal, então é porque o senhor é tão inculto como o entrevistado.
Tenho dito!
Passe bem.
@@aldoleandro9391falar sobre o que não se sabe é ignorância burra. Eu não disse isso.
Mas o entrevistado falou sobre o que sabe. São opiniões; você tem a sua.
E sobre o fado, repito, há quem goste muito e depois há o resto. Eu, pessoalmente, pertenço ao resto. Dou valor cultural e nacional, mas não aprecio. Por isso, somos 10 milhões, cada um com o seu conjunto de gostos e opiniões. Digamos que, sobre Portugal num todo, haveria 10 milhões de entrevistas diferentes.
Alguém achar que a sua seria a melhor... discordo.
Cumprimentos 🇵🇹
Oh wow...can you still find Portuguese men in Portugal 😮???
Too much restaurants, bars and so on!!! For what?? We need houses and other stuff
During the dictatorship, more than 80% of the population was illiterate - the reasoning behind subtitles was to prevent Portuguese people to have access to foreign influence and culture, regardless of passing the scensorship or not. That was the reasoning for all the foreign content being subtitled back in the 70's. That industry was kept in the 80's and 90's, thus, as Leo stated, every piece of media in Portugal is in the original language, and always subtitled.
80% really?
This is not true at all. Besides it's easier to censership when you dubb than when you subtitle
@@pauvermelho I don't know how old you are, but in the late 60's early 70's, arround 80% of the population was illiterate, yes. And actually there are historical documents stating orders that no foreign documents, or media should be translated to Portuguese, so, yes - that was how they made sure that the foregin influence was contained from the rest of the population. Since there were no resources or anything that resembled a dubbing industry after the dictatorship (think late 70's and 80's) all the media was subtitled.
Propably It's the opposite and 80% of the population in 1970 wasn't iliterated.
I'm old enougf to know that number that you said it's extremly highly exagerated.
You can check for yourself just google it, I already did, I just don't remenber the exact numbers
@@pauvermelho I did also - the official numbers from the census in 1960 is arround 60%, but those numbers tended to be manipulated by the regime. The fact was that only 1 in every 5 children, in rural areas, would go to school. All of my grandparents were illiterate, and my mum only has the second grade. My father was illiterate, as most people from their time. My generation (me and my older brother) were the first ones to finish 9th grade. I ended up going to College already as an adult, after mooving to Porto, in the early 90's. I was born in 72, so when I was 6, we were already in a post dictatorship social situation.
That being stated, 80% is not highly exagerated, considering that the propaganda numbers were of 60%.
It has nothing to do with Proganda and that number refers to 1950, I'm going to put here the source:
"A taxa de literacia subiu, entre 1926 e 1950, de 38.2% para 58.6%. Entre as crianças de 10 a 14 anos, a taxa de analfabetismo diminuiu, entre 1930 e 1950, de 58% para 24% (Candeias, 2004)"
Maybe you perceive that way because you came from a place where that happened. But note this: in the 70's most of the population already moved to cities if it was true what you say, 80% of my parents friends/classmates/collegues would be iliterated... and that is very far from reality
In Brazil, the fun fact is that a lot of girls fall in love cuz the guy is Gringo haha
@@tmpoliver I think this is old news bro , outdated I mean kkkkk
A loads of them got the reality check and got back to their senses 😆
@@digitandoshshua haha of course! So you’re right. I will go back to talk my women brazilian friends and my gringo friends. After that, I will let know about it 🤣 btw I’m Brazilian
Brazilian men make the best lovers 😂
Romantic relationships are not a beautiful thing. Romance causes a lot of problems in this world. Life is a lot better without romance than it is with it. Romantic love is not special at all, and I think that the romantic type of love isn't real. More than half of romantic couples either break up with each other or divorce each other. Romantic relationships are objectively very prone to failure. And most couples who are still together are usually not happy being together.
Also, there are a lot of toxic romantic relationships. Like an example is that abuse happens a lot in romantic relationships.
Studies prove single, childless, women are the HAPPIEST demographic. Women are the happiest when single and focused on themselves.
You guys talk as if being conservative is a bad thing.
Wait....thats very good!!❤
16:25 where is the data for loudness?😂
Um portuense quando vem para Lisboa passa a agir igual. E são características da população menos rica
Yes ir was!!! They want portuguese to speak a lotbof languages!!! Camon!!!
Brazilian women should be like the portuguese women.
@@flowershower6857 says who? 😅
No they shouldn't.
@@tiagoribeiro5832 they should. Ofc you would say otherwise because you would get benefit.
Ladies, save yourself until marriage and do not be easy.
@@tiagoribeiro5832 what comes easy, goes easy.
@@flowershower6857 Portuguese women aren't hard. They just require you to ask them to be your girlfriend before having sex and >99% of them have sex before marriage, so I have no idea what you're talking about
i can't imagine that Leo has ever had a difficult time with womem 😅
ic what u did there!
It takes fame and a YT channel.
@@nicolerae27 you must be a man
Is this why most young people in Portugal are single and childless? lol
Does your country has a lot of young single mothers?
The best ocean and beachs to be,the best tan, plenty of iodo!!
Welcome to the Champions League
É preciso não esquecer que há varios brasis!
Canal panda em inglês e em espanhol?!! Tens que meter mais tabaco, nisso que andas a fumar...
deves ser um chavalo novo para não saberes que antigamente passavam coisas em inglês e em espanhol no canal panda
Inglês não me lembro mas o Doraemon passava em espanhol, deves ser muito novo para não teres experienciado isso.
Ditactors??? 😅😅 Not doble to learn languages Leoooo!!! Hello
Esta bem means its ok!!!
Who is this guy?
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹
Vai diminuirte a ti e leva o preconeito para lonje e nao mandes o youtube recomendarte
i know of portugal
🇵🇹🇵🇹❤
Brazilian women and culture in general still being misunderstood in most places. It is a more complex culture anyway, with a loads of layers to it in the relationship matter...
Brazilians make some of the best partners in life one could get. Its easy to feel pretty much in love your whole life. Especially the ones from Minas Gerais and the interior of Sao Paulo State ( not the City).
They have a lot of self respect not coming from an outside social rule but coming from self love, strong intuition and self knowledge/ internal wisdom so they are capaple of loving and being loyal and passionate, making their partners love them very deeply.
Women in the world would have a loads to learn from them on how having confidence and freedom from strict rules of how they should act ( liberal or conservative), being able to chose accordinly on how they feel in each case, at the same time as not losing their feminility and lovable traits.
I am surprised not even Portuguese people know that... I mean , there are some nationalities that are realising that now, but the Portuguese had a lot of time and advantage to find that out.long time ago.
Maybe for the fact that they sensed how Portuguese would be emocionally unavaillabe and prejudiced towads them and kept distance while just the ones that didnt care for it made themselllves availlabe.
Too bad for them 🤦♂️
I know a married couple they are 24 and a couple since 18
@@MegaMayday16 congratulations to you.
Bro, I know it's hard to accept, but the world will label you whether you like it or not. And whether you like it or not, depending on the metrics, your country will fit somewhere in a range of metrics. Brazilian women are like other women.......except they aren't because you just complimented them as being above average in some key ways. See? You are measuring them against a certain standard...............everyone else does that too, depending on the standard. The portuguese are also labelled, and are also placed high or low in many metrics.