Ironically, her entire livestream is a perfect demonstration of why victim advocates DO need to be trained on proper trauma-informed practices. Experiencing trauma qualifies you to speak about your OWN trauma and relate to others on interpersonal levels, but it does not necessary qualify you to advocate for victims on a public or professional scale.
ALSO speaking of irony, she is threatening to release documents about someone else's abuse (Drake's victim) but lashing out at Kat for speaking to her stalker (or something to do with the stalker, I'm still confused on what she's saying there?). So Alexa is quite literally threatening to be the "Kat" in that situation to Drake's victim. She truly can ONLY see her own perspective and victimhood.
exactly this. I am currently a psych major graduating next year and plan to get a masters in clinical counseling and.... i've lots of thoughts on alexa
Literally her entire spiel about how she had no idea i’m like girl. That’s literally one of the most common things talk about with abuse it’s ‘hurt people hurt people’, i don’t believe for a second she suddenly learnt that i think she’s just pretending to to give her more wiggle room to operate in her reaction to the drake bell stuff
Yeah I feel like as a survivor myself that lesson is taught quickly and in a very unsavory way so idk why she didn't know that it's the first thing you learn or the first thing I learned when they tried the excuses
@@rabbit6546Yea, I'm not buying she didn't know cuz literally almost ALL abusers have been abused in some kind of way to be the way they are. It's way more rare for someone to just be born a bad person and still hurt people despite a great upbringing. Hence why we call it a cycle cuz we pass it on to others. Do we live on the same planet, how did she go through trauma and therapy and conveniently miss that part? I'm flabbergasted
I get that she's not great, but like as a survivor, I had hoped she would have enough respect to not release *sealed* documents. The _visceral_ betrayal is indescribable.
As a grape survivor, if I was brave enough to take my abuser to court and tell my story, I would be absolutely MORTIFIED if someone not involved in the case got those documents. If someone not involved in the case had the details of my personal story and the details of the events that happened. That's so unbelievably personal. It's not entertainment. It's none of their business. It's not information, for someone who wasn't even there that night, to use to decide whether I was telling the truth or not. Then to find out this person wants to post them publicly for everyone to see? Be for real. Is it really so hard for people to understand that Alexa having those documents is wrong? No matter how she allegedly obtained them? Just because she decided to tell her story publicly does NOT mean that everyone else wants to do the same.
I don’t know where the victims are from or where the incidents took place, but in my state there are serious legal protocols around privacy of victim information. We can’t share ANYTHING without a release of information, we have to redact anything that could possibly be made public, we have to inform the victim who and where their name is being sent. Police information has to follow chain of evidence. Not to mention this involves minors?!?! Who the hell is this person!!!
Im sorry that happened to you... and its so sad to see someone wanting to defend herself and caring more about that than protecting a survivor... what a shitshow honestly
@@mt3981it’s clear she got it in a non official manner but for her to face repercussions I believe it would be the victim/their family to make a report. In the EU privacy laws are so tight, even for finding out if you are suspicious about someone, the police can then inform if they are on the SO registry, or have any prior criminal history, occurs in a manner where no one else would ever find out someone did request that info
As someone with ptsd who is a clinical researcher in ptsd and substance use….Being trauma informed is NOT a magical tool gained thru experiencing trauma.
The fact that at the beginning she says it’s rude to tell people to go to therapy but later in the video her mom is tell people in the chat that they need therapy 😭
Her mother was terrible in that chat, resorting to saying "well, I'm a mama bear what do you expect?" to defend herself. Couth. Compassion. Understanding. Maturity. Respect. I'd settle for saying nothing, love.
As a former professional victim services worker she has had me raising an eyebrow from the beginning. She has always appeared to me as someone who is uneducated about abuse/trauma and who desperately needs trauma recovery therapy themselves. In my opinion she has never done this from a place of education and advocacy, this has always stemmed from a desire for vengeance for herself. Part of that is a desire to bring attention to what happened to her (while leveraging other people's stories to boost her own). Wanting to shout your story from the rooftops is a normal part of healing but making a media/business circus of it is not. Alllllll of my opinions were validated by her being *SHOCKED* that a perpetrator has also been a victim and being unable to hold those two truths at once. I cannot believe that never even crossed her mind. This has never been about advocacy for her, it's been about fame.
You hit the nail on the head with her desire for vengeance! She is so clearly uninformed on effective education and advocacy in abuse/trauma recovery. I was a fan at first but as time went on, it became clear that she has not healed from her own trauma and watching her videos became such an uncomfortable experience. I felt like I was watching something that shouldn’t be available to the public. It’s so clear that she is seriously struggling and needs more help than she’s currently receiving.
@@lmnlsteseven if you did give them attention at one point, it wouldn’t be the same as being a perpetual victim as if it happened yesterday. I think that’s the biggest concern. Her story sheds light on a probably super common experience for child stars. However, we rehash it every video and it becomes unhealthy. I almost think she’s been frozen in time and headspace of her traumas earlier in life and can’t find distance from it, it’s really saddening.
i’m late on this but i have a genuine question: when kat is asking what alexa’s credentials are, is that not just to get more information to include in the article? like an introduction to alexa for readers who might not be aware of who this person is? like i feel like i’m going insane watching this woman get asked essentially what she does in the advocacy space, get insecure over not having formal credentials (which to my knowledge no one said she needed to have) and then proceed to project that insecurity onto kat. am i missing something here???
Her response saying to get credentials you just have to take a quiz like no????? Downplaying the credentials of trauma management and recovery is incredibly dangerous to do like i get it can feel invalidating as a victim to not have those accolades when doing advocacy but alexa is a prime example of how ppl who lead by personal experience w trauma rather than knowledge of how to handle and heal from trauma can be maladaptive and harmful for survivors
Yes, I'm a writer. It's for a sentence like, "Alexa Nikolas, a [blank] year old from [blank] who has a [relevant credential], told me over email, "xyz." That's all. This meltdown over a basic question is WILD
@@rabbit6546and not only that but even if by some alternative reality it was “as simple as a quiz” why wouldnt she have gotten the certification??? Like bestie did you try to get it and fail the test???
She talks about Drake’s past as if she is the first human being to figure out that some abusers were also abused. She’s so ignorant about abuse that she really believes she made a huge discovery.
- Didnt address going to Drake Bell's concert - Didn't address how she has different documents than the public released ones - Continues to be a Predator Protector even while live - Blames everyone but herself - Thinks questions from a journalist are direct attacks - She is so self centered the entire time that it's ALL about her - Husband in chat being a 'mean girl' lmfao - IRRELEVANT 💜
also im laughing so hard at people being like "Kat went to the bar with Adam!!!" but 1. doesnt know what he was drinking and 2. Adam is literally old enough in his own country to drink, sorry that America is different but that doesnt mean shit 😭😭 lord an 18 year old is not an "underage minor" get a grip
I may be mistaken but I think she did address the Drake bell concert no? Seemed like her long tangent about empathizing with Drake bell and “humanizing” him with his story he told was meant to tell the audience “I’m human, I felt bad for him so when I went to the concert, it’s cause I felt bad for how I treated him without knowing what he went through”. Now I don’t think that is justified. She wasn’t visiting 12 year old drake’s garage band, she was visiting a grown adult’s concert, an adult who knows right and wrong and has admitted to putting children’s well being at risk. I think she did address it but it was not good and does not speak great about her, almost like she could be easily swayed.
I used to really support Alexa in the very beginning, but after about a week of consuming her content, something about her was really off. She just seemed really dramatic and petty in situations that didn't warrant it, and her victimhood was starting to drain me. It reminded me of my toxic friends who can't go a second in a conversation without redirecting attention back to their personal traumas non-stop. I'm not doubting that she really did go through a lot as a child, but she really needs help to work through her victim complex. It's clear to me that she really does have a tremendous amount of very real, clinical triggere that she needs help for before she can continue on as a public figure.
YES! I understand that her trauma has probably caused her to have a hostile bias toward the world, where she feels everything is an attack, but like.. not everything anyone does ever is about you, and it’s difficult to take her seriously because of that perception
💯 unfortunately, spending thousands of hours in therapy doesn't automatically mean you've gotten better. There are a troubling number of bad therapists out there. I'm totally pro-therapy, my best Judy is a therapist, but you have to be careful. Therapists can be amazing and change your life for the better, but they can also enable you or even make things worse. I don't really want to get personal about Alexa, but this behavior does not support her insistence that she is healed. if she's seeing a therapist 3x per week... What are they saying about all this? Are they supporting this behavior? It's a sad thought.
Same here her content is extremely draining. I used to support her too but I was turned off by how self centered she is. I always had a funny feeling but I couldn’t tell what it was. She victimizes herself so much, and is so histrionic imo. Now I see what it is. YIKES
Same, I saw an interview of her and I couldn’t quite place my finger on it but something about her was almost… draining to listen to. I am usually very invested in hearing about victims’ stories as one myself, but there was something about Alexa that seemed odd and it turned me off to ever seeking out her content. Not that I don’t believe her, but it kind of kept me from actively supporting her and her content.
"You didn't believe me, you didn't believe a survivor." This is interesting. To my knowledge Kat has never questioned the validity of Alexa's OWN experience of abuse (please anyone correct me if I'm wrong). The issue is that they disagree on SOMEONE ELSES experience of abuse (Kat believes Drake's victims while also believing Drake, Alexa does not believe Drake was guilty of the crime he plead guilty for). So according to Alexa, must we believe survivors on EVERY take they have? For EVERY opinion ever presented, we must agree because they have once been abused? This is a massively slippery slope that I do not think she wants to go down.
yet Alexa is perfectly happy to hire the lawyer of someone who a potential podcast guest was assaulted by despite being pleaded with not to, or testify against a survivor in a court case on behalf of that person's abuser over a petty financial dispute
What’s interesting about Alexa is that she compares all situations to high school. Like a journalist investigating her claims is just a mean girl and a journalist asking questions is just a girl trying to ask pointed questions to hurt her, and anyone criticizing her is a bully. Unfortunately I feel like victims of abuse are often stunted in emotional maturity. Unless you do the work through therapy to work on yourself you might end up stuck at a mental age when facing your emotions. What happened to Alexa on the set of Zoey 101 was not only traumatic but it seems to have shaped her frame of view when it comes to interacting with adults that challenge her perspective. If you challenge her perspective you’re basically 13 year old Jamie Lynn Spears to her and that’s how she will treat you. Very unfortunate mindset to be in.
You are right, I was like her and watching this makes me glad I got humbled instead of famous…. I am a far better human being now and if we realize we need to process each layer as it is revealed and life has new traumas that we will need to heal we realize this is more like hygiene. Saying I am healed is like saying I brushed my teeth, GREAT but also not the flex you think dear. Just because our world lacks emotional hygiene doesn’t mean doing the bare minimum is a flex. Like showering once a week wasn’t a flex a hundred years ago, but those that did were def ahead of the pack
I am so sorry, but as a victim OF a victim: the moment you perpetuate your SA trauma onto someone else is the moment you lose the ability to be overwhelmingly empathized with. When someone makes a DECISION to harm someone else based on what happens to them, you lose the shelter of victimhood. I’m so sick of this narrative that we need to feel bad for people who committed a CRIME. I will forever carry what happened to me, and I have NO inclination to pass that on to someone else. The “we are all humans” argument is meant to de-escalate the severity of their actions. Be so for real Alexa
Genuinely her refusal to say she supports drake’s victim and instead say she stands behind her bravery it’s incredibly telling to me, it’s a simple yes or no question like i am incredibly sorry for drake for what he want through it’s abhorrent and horrifying but at no point am i gonna place my sympathy with him over her
The thing is, rehabilitation is absolutely possible. But drake hasn’t taken accountability for his actions, hasn’t openly discussed what he’s doing to make sure he ends the cycle of violence in his own life, and hasn’t come out in support of his own victims when hoards of people were attacking them online after quiet on set came out. He’s done nothing apart from coming out as a survivor himself. Using public sympathy and newfound relevance to further your music career is not taking responsibility or accountability!
If I had nickels for everytime I've seen a predator hunter seemly with that attitude, I'd have at least two nickels (cough cough Chris Hansen cough cough) and that's not a lot but it's still interesting
10000000% this!!! It's what I struggle with the most. Girl you are absolutely entitled to your opinion, but SO IS KAT! There is no objective truth here, it is victims vs the accused and if you are choosing not to believe a victim that's your prerogative. Do not weaponize your own trauma against Kat and Adam for BELIEVING A VICTIM (the horror!! the worst thing they could do!).
Black and white thinking. Very common in trauma survivors. I myself had to slowly chip away at mine and I still grapple with it even with therapy. But uh. Most of us dont try to preform advocacy work without the therapy and training needed beforehand!
Ah yes, a staple tactic of misogyny; degrade, infantilize, and sexualize all in the same sentence. He managed to do it in 8 letters. Very concerning that a person who claims to be an advocate for survivors is enabling their spouse to weaponize misogynistic language against someone as a means of suppressing their speaking out against your harmful actions. And then being comfortable with those sentiments being echoed by your chat and your own mother? What a very emotionally unsafe atmosphere. Part of why I un-subbed and cancelled my membership was because I felt like I was smelling these vibes several months ago, and it's sad to see that in that time it's gotten worse, and those smells were coming from a very really rotted, moldy structure that has only kept growing. This, and the stark lack of survivor/trauma informed conversations, the lack of nuance, the self-centering that kept occurring, so many things led me to leaving the channel, ending my membership, and disengaging from her platforms fully. I don't feel like we can make a lot of progress for victims if we are comfortably and loudly promoting misogynists and the tenets of their beliefs.
Let's say Dan Schneider said tomorrow he had been a victim himself when he was a kid, would Alexa now have a different perspective and forgive all the harm he did?!
I think she would still stand against him but only bc she was personally affected by the situation Bc i genuinely believe that alexa's advocacy for survivors only extends to herself, and to people whose stories it would be beneficial for her to cover
Wow. I pulled away from her months ago simply because it was apparent then that she made all of this about herself instead of the survivors and the overall message. Now that is a proven fact.
Yep same here, only I got confirmation when she ran away when ppl called her out for defending Drake all of a sudden. That was the moment I knew she sucked and only cared about herself.
No. She is speaking her Truth and her anger over people preying on others is correct. Plus this is literally just the tip of the iceberg…this ‘club’ they belong to is much larger than people like you realize
But this is what made her "relevant" so she made being a victim her whole identity and uses it as a shield to avoid criticism. She needs to take a break and strip down the ego.
@@tias78 exactly why it’s always been so awkward to listen to her repeat the same phrases over and over again, and this super weird mantra of “eat a predator.” like she’s just always on the edge of her seat to be angry and it’s not healthy, she doesn’t have a point in her day where she’s not working or thinking about that shit.
Kat: *asks neutral questions like you would expect from a professional journalist* Alexa: This is bullying!!! Harassment!! How dare you not believe victims. Alexa is so childish and self-absorbed.
As a CSA survivor, if you are a survivor who goes on to SA a child, you are no longer a victim, you’re a predator and you deserve to be in a jail cell. *You* decided to perpetuate what was done to you onto others knowing damn well what it can do to a person. Shame on Drake Bell, and shame on Alexa for supporting him.
I honestly think her source for the documents was Drake himself or his lawyers. I feel like she isn't saying it because it will make her look even worse at this point.
Can’t believe I haven’t considered this holy shit. That is super likely!!! And she might have even thought they *were* public, just didn’t do any fact checking.
“Believe Survivors!…. Except Drake Bell’s because he’s my friend now.” - Alexa Nikolas; Founder of ‘Eat Predators…. Except Drake Bell because he’s my friend now’, Ultimate Authority on Activism, Most Important Victim to ever exist, & Drake Bell’s friend now
John Wayne Gacy Jr was a survivor but sure, let’s ignore what he did because… it changed something in you to know he was a survivor. That’s literally how weird Alexa’s comments about Drake sound.
@@HunniebeeGames I'm from a small town and I'd rather ppl ask me if rumors are true than run with it behind my back, seems similar, I don't get why it's bad to ask at all
23:44 i think she is subconsciously getting closer and closer to realizing that predators are people too, and that she is just as capable of victimizing others as they are. and that addressing the harm she has caused while healing does not invalidate her experiences that caused her need to heal. a classic sign of trauma is black and white thinking, and i am hoping she genuinely takes a break from the internet to become more comfortable with grey area issues and her own culpability
i saw one say "i deleted the people who were sending adam hate" while alexa has adams video SHE made fun of up on screen lol.... she's so contradictive
As someone who is a survivor and struggles with my mental health, this was painful to watch. She’s paranoid and condescending and refuses to see anything from another person’s point of view. She never explains herself, just points fingers and gets defensive and calls others names. I hope she gets out of whatever self-absorbed spiral she’s in. Being a victim of EVERYONE you interact with is not a healthy way to live. 😢
Hi, I have a Journalism degree (for reference). The questions are absolutely fine. The first question is literally just a background question. If you don't want to answer, ignore or say you have no comment. Answering in this way just leads to self sabotage.
That’s what didn’t make sense to me, if she didn’t like or want to answer certain questions she could have just…. Not answered those questions?! And instead she decided to destroy her public image
Same, journalist here. The questions are absolutely okay. Alexa is going through something because this is not a normal response to an otherwise professional email...
Alexa being so angry about the list of questions is bizarre. All of those questions gave her ample opportunity to dispel any “defamatory” claims against her. It’s like she thinks those questions were Kat’s opinions rather than Kat trying to get the full story.
This is like Twilight Zone levels of weird. A journalist asking questions (even questions about responses of accusations) is not a personal attack. Any ethical journalist would have asked those questions in this situation.
Exactly. In fact, it can be viewed as the opposite… they are acting ethically by giving you the opportunity to SHARE YOUR STORY, which is what should always be offered safely to survivors…
As someone who has experienced trauma, and has also been trained in trauma response, one does not equal the other. Experiencing trauma does not qualify you as an expert on trauma, and not if you're not mindful and cautious, you can cause more harm.
Anyone who feels comfortable publicly tossing around court documents involving a minor without the minor’s consent (oh wait, minors can’t consent!) has a serious problem and don’t deserve to call themselves allies for victims.
I’m SO happy you did decide to discuss this. I think it was necessary. Stand up for yourself even if she’s going through her own struggles - it doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be help accountable in the moment to only be held accountable when she’s in a better place (if that ever happens).
All this over an article that was NEVER EVEN POSTED because a journalist was doing her job by asking questions for both sides of a story because journalist are SUPPOSED TO BE UNBIASED AND SHOULD GET A FULL STORY. The article was literally never posted, whether it was bc they thought Alexa didn’t have enough following or something kat realized, it was NEVER posted and was completely dropped. How can you attack and accuse a journalist of so many things for just asking questions they never even released when you’ve seen previous work of theirs that proves they back survivors?? “Witch-hunt” THE ARTICLE WAS NEVER RELEASED
Ikr🤣 like it's ok to not be relevant in pop culture and adam didn't even say it personally but she kept referencing it like he's a bully I was so frustrated but laughing at the same time lmao
I can tell she has a massive ego when “quiet in set” came out she complained about the fact that they didn’t put more of her clips in it 😂, she also complained that she didn’t get invited to the last ep when they spoke to the former child actors who experienced bad treatment. It’s all ego for her ,all me me me, “as a survivor” blah blah blah.
Kat could ask Alexa “what’s your favorite color?” and Alexa would spin it to say that Kat is being racist and would say something like “I don’t believe in color, Kat. I don’t see color. How dare you trigger my trauma.”
Reminds me of the time in High school when the teachers told us to be SYMPATHETIC to the bullies that would physically and emotionally hurt us, because the bullies have “terrible home life.” Like, why are you telling us victims to just let bullies continue to hurt us?
I imagine she has a traumatic situation that she hasn’t processed through enough yet that involves a white claw…. One case I read the girl was terrified of milk because she survived her throat being slit and she woke up as a child and tried to drink milk and blacked out when it leaked out of her neck so yea I would probably scream at the sight of milk too and lose my shit. But people need to stop enabling people staying in that state, we need to process and heal so we don’t harm ourselves or others.
@@elvingearmasterirma7241 I hope so too, I wish we got to learn more about the outcome of case studies like that more but there is rarely follow up. I think it would be valuable for humanity to learn the truth of what happens and how one can cope with that as well. The way the systems study this leaves out a lot of data that leaves us ignorant. I only know because my case is one of them so I keep healing and make videos about it as I can. But if the systems actually helped people heal- there would be more healthy people in good places.
So glad you decided to respond to this! I was flabbergasted by her response. Alexa, you are not the judge of who is a survivor and who isn’t. Take some time off and do some self reflection, as a survivor I was disappointed and disgusted.
As a survivor that has had to heal and move on she’s not healing. You can go to therapy everyday and not get any better unless you want to get better and let go of it. She’s stuck on the anger stage and she won’t be able to move on from this unless she lets go of anger. I appreciate the intention of what she’s doing but maybe she needs to take a step back it’s clearly effecting her negatively
Not always , I suffered so much damage because it was 22 years, started at 2 weeks old. Therapy isn't the be all end all. It definitely helped but these tools have limits
It is just so clear to me that she is too unwell and doesn’t have the level of insight (at the current moment) to do this type of work. That’s okay. Advocate y work is extremely retraumatizing at times, and not accounting for that ahead of time can end up resulting in a spiralling decompensation like this. I hope she steps away. It’s best for everyone.
And I want to add. Letting go of the anger doesnt mean forgiving the one who hurt you. Its just so you stop focusing so much emotional and mental energy on them so you can focus on healing. Also I dont care what her intentions are honestly. Once you start touching on survivor advocacy without you yourself being in a stable enough place? You start hurting those you claim to advocate for.
@@elvingearmasterirma7241 Agreed.. she needs to stop analysing other victims stories, that are sealed, where the perpetrator is already convicted...and then complain in the same breath about a journalist asking her simplr questions.. like dude, no??? How is that fair?
The weirdest part about this is that Alexa conflates herself and EVERY SINGLE SURVIVOR EVER!!! It’s so warped… I truly think she needs more help, she has truly lost the plot. It’s truly sad… good on you Adam for sticking up for yourself and Kat. Much love and God bless
As a human sciences major, trauma informed care (TIC) is a LOT more than a quiz. It's knowledge of how trauma impacts development. How it affects children. Adults. Resource education. What is she thinking?????
right!!! I am a psych major and when she said that i was in shock, jaw dropped... really shows how completely uninformed she is and honestly under-qualified. she is qualified to speak on her own abuse and her own abuse only.
The thing i don't like about the sickalodeon tshirt is shes not the only victim from that show and doesn't know how having that shirt as merch will make other survivors of the network feel it just kind of shows how she centres herself rather than considering others
@@tijanaself897 honestly! She got so upset that she didnt get invited back for the bonus ep of Quiet on Set like the bullying she received from other cast members was in the same vein as the other network colleagues' being on the receiving end of racism and literal assault; like not saying the bullying wasn't bad but it feels a lot like she wants to profit off her colleagues' trauma
It’s so hard to watch her spiral like this… I think she’s gone through a lot and had to protect herself to the point where she can’t take legitimate criticism as anything other than an attack. NOT an excuse, just very very sad.
I agree too im hoping she isnt evil and is just someone whos very unwell although it doesnt excuse her behavior i trusted her by watching her channel and boy i feel stupid😔 to good to be true although ive always had a weird feeling...
@@Poof-y8jaw... please remember that her actions are on her, it is normal and human to trust - please do not let her behavior shake your confidence in yourself. I am so sorry she betrayed your trust and let you down. It's a painful thing to experience. ❤️🩹
So theres a lot of overlap between Autism and PTSD and a lot of people in our communities struggle with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria so I genuinely do think it is a trauma response for her to take even the least harmful bit of constructive critcism as an attack. I have sympathy from the angle of being an autistic survivor but at the same time, she does not seem to be equipped with the coping tools she needs to be at the forefront of this advocacy work and so in the public eye all the time
I watched her in the beginning but quickly realized she really needs therapy and probably shouldn't be doing this because all she is doing is reliving & reinforcing her traumas. It's like the blind leading the blind. She's not stable and in a good headspace to really do this in general.
I am a 22 year old survivor of generational sexual trauma and I will be the first in a long line of ancestors to not repeat the cycle. I have known since the time I reported my childhood abuse that perpetrators were usually once victims themselves. However, in the 10 years since then I have come to the belief that once the victim is above 18, and that line is crossed from victim to perpetrator, that person is completely responsible for their own beliefs and behaviours. How Alexa has acted during this whole situation has really highlighted to me just how stunted she is in her trauma process. She is still stuck in the victim mentality that many victims experience long after their childhood abuse. I will acknowledge it is incredibly difficult to come to terms with. Identifying and taking responsibility for your mistakes as an adult is completely necessary to live a healthy balanced life. The fact that she's fighting for Drake bell emphasizes just how strong her victim mentality is and how she extends it from herself to people she relates to. I think she needs a good long break from the media and to do the internal work needed to regain a balanced healthy mental health.
Just wanted to add that under 18 perpetrators I believe the parents are completely to blame for not getting the person the help they needed to stop those behaviours
Yoooo I am so proud of you!!! 💜💜💜 I feel like she may need some distance from her mother in order to heal - I do not know her, but I would recommend the same to literally any survivor with a parent doing moderation for them on social media/RUclips. That is not an example of healthy boundaries! Genuinely hope she is able to grow, heal, be okay, be safe for others... I want that for everyone.
Her mother in the chat just stirring things up explains so much about why Alexa is the way she is. I love and support all my kids no matter what, but if you're about to make a bad choice and go live to drag people online without a good enough reason to, im going to try to stop you. Find another way, talk with the people you have a problem with before you make yourself look like an ass being over defensive. Ill never get running to the Internet to deal with things unless youve tried everything else or the person is dangerous. But THIS, is internalized incompetence acting like "I dont know why everyone is so mad at me. I've done nothing wrong" Yes you did, Alexa, and you know it. Playing dumb ain't cute.
Exactly. That’s actual parent behavior: stepping in and letting them know the truth from someone that loves and protects them. It’s probably-to Alexa’s mom at least-not as fun as being an online troll but it’s the responsible, adult thing to do.
Her mom never really cared about her. She made her child actor and she left her in another state all alone. Where she dated a creep at 16 with no protection from anyone. Then she married that creep and got trapped in that marriage. She needs to realise that her mom never cared for her, unlike what she says.
@@houski4242564 It actually hurt knowing that Alexa is still desperately seeking that acceptance and approval from her mom so much, context doesn't matter anymore. She knows better but she sees her mom talking down to all the "haters" and showing her more "support" than she usually gets so she's eating it up. As a kid who was largely ignored and now as a mother, it's a horrible mindset to lock your kids into because then they start to shape their lives into what their parents want and lose sight of who they are. And they become blind to who they are. You should never put yr child into the position they feel like they have to earn love and attention from you. Alexa is obviously responsible for her own actions and behavior but her mom should be the one feeling responsible for allowing her child to end up in this situation to begin with. So many bad choices for money and attention and now she is using her again for attention. The white knight mother protecting her daughter from the ravenous internet. I bet she feels so righteous for it. I could see her posting it on Facebook too, she seems like one of those moms. Sorry, I'm rambling. It just makes it extra upsetting when you are a parent yourself and see the damage being done to people from their parents. Makes me want to analyze my own actions even more to try and not do any of this stuff to my kids cuz I have trauma from parents I don't want to put on them. They should be better than me, not the other way around.
This woman has one of the biggest egos I have ever seen. This is the reason why so many good movements fail. Because they get co-opted by egomaniacs like this that use a good fight to further their own interests, whether that is to gain fame, money, adoration, or simply to be seen as "better" than others Edit to say: she gave me Mamamax vibes right off the bat when I first saw her channel, got an icky feeling and left
@@louis2879yeah it’s just a premiere. It’s when a video is uploaded with a live chat for everyone to watch it at the same time and comment. But I think it’s a recording of a live he did earlier
She needs time off of the internet. She needs time away from the advocacy. The way she describes Kat asking her questions as "abusive" and "retraumatizing" followed by her saying to Kat, "you revictimized me," is so troubling. She is in attack mode and she's not giving herself time and space away from the internet which is just fueling her anger - which causes her to post more videos like these - and results in her losing support for and participation in her movement. Her "I'm a survivor and if you don't agree with everything I do and say, you are an abusive bully" is harmful to the movement.
Everyone is out to get me syndrome. That is thick level trauma reaction there. She's only being asked to prove what she's saying. But then has to treat it like people are out to get her. Its insane if she is offended by not being the most relevant victim out there. Maybe greedy-wanting to get shows and more attention from her victim brand?
When you say you are an advocate for victims and work with victims it is important to be trauma informed so you don't traumatize them more. Victims that do not work in the field of advocacy and mental health don't necessarily need to be trauma informed but it is just good in general wtf
I’ve worked in DV and SA for 10+ years, we literally have policies that disallow survivors from serving in a paid or volunteer capacity for the org for a long time and after a lot of therapy/healing. The work itself it traumatizing, it’s compounded with lived experience. Having the training of trauma informed care is essential to keep from hurting the people you need to help. I hope she can take a step back and get some help if her ultimate goal is to uplift other survivors.
It’s creepy. She’s always talking about not being in the drama bc she has kids so she’s too good for it and yet she’s sitting there doing the math to see what time it is for a 21 yr old RUclipsr halfway around the world bc they were too honest for her ego. Weird behavior in general and she seems like she’s triggered and spiraling 🫤😬
@@lisadgingersnaps9843I agree, but I also find it strange how while she was complaining about Nickelodeon and others “silencing” her…she was quite literally silencing people in her chat for speaking out on basic cues like the ones Adam is now mentioning…that’s what I mean by her coming across as not really caring
I’m beginning to think so to. I don’t think it started that way fully, maybe?but I think deep down there was always that self-righteous feeling involved for her in fighting for other survivors
@@lisadgingersnaps9843 I think so too but money and "relevancy" make people do crazy shit. I think she even would've criticized the merch-selling if she had seen it from another victim advocate at the time.
I don't know the whole situation with who has been stalking Alexa or what's been going on with what she was referring to, BUT I noticed some dangerous wording used SO just to put this out there in case even one person doesn't know, if you are being harassed or stalked, do not refer to them outwardly as "MY stalker" and don't talk about them or confront them (I know it seems fucked up but to them that is giving them attention and in their mind more of a connection to you.) , unfortunately with they way their mind works it's like a challenge to them, if it gets escalated and they know they're getting to you it's something for them to feed off of and it sucks. It shouldn't have to be the victim that has to take charge like this but unfortunately law enforcement isn't very helpful and stalkers are unhinged creeps. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING YOU CAN. You should still get law enforcement involved because it's at least something, make other people like family and friends aware, even people like your landlord. -Someone who's been stalked
I agree, one of the sick people that decided to stalk me was Gary Zerola and there are way too many dudes like him out there…. It took 5 women coming forward with rape allegations from their 20s for him to FINALLY go to jail. I am just lucky I listened to the voice in my head that said move after I turned down his marriage proposal on the 3rd date… I felt like he was going to break in and I didn’t care who called me crazy. Now learning he is in jail for raping a person in a similar way I think society needs to wake the fuck up and stop putting the burden on survivors if they actually want things to get better.
55:31 "you retraumatized me, you revictimized me, you made me not feel believed" ok. go to therapy. this is not kat's problem? go talk to your therapist about it. if someone online asking you questions triggers you this deeply, maybe it's not them. maybe you have some more work to do instead of just projecting your issues onto everyone else. nobody's "punishing" you jfc
the fact that the first question "what are your professional experience and credentials for victim advocacy", which could have been taken as an opportunity to share your experience and the amazing work you've done, registered to alexa as an insult worth ranting about for full minutes is crazy 😭😭
"Never call me irrelevant again!" Why is she sooo offended by it? Lol.. and why tf is she sooo bothered by legit questions? They are abuse? There's no rational thinking occurring anymore.
More than anything it seems like Alexa is offended because she is triggered, and she feels personally attacked because of her own imposter syndrome. To be immediately triggered by asking what credentials she has in relation to survivors... In my opinion, shows how much she must feel like she's not qualified or at the very least shows that she fully believes that is how others feel about her. She needs to fire her therapists. Three appointments per week.... And she is still this sensitive and reactive? This is such a bad look. Honeeyyyyy 😮💨😮💨😮💨
answering so many of the questions with “if you watched my videos ________” she’s a journalist, not a drama channel? Her job isn’t to get information from content, it’s from having direct answers from the source
Ugh the way I am rolling my eyes so hard. The dramatic pauses, the cheesy lines, the tears and unhinged behavior... GEEZ woman. Alexa is truly an eternal victim, isn't she? And no one has suffered pain like she has or is wronged like her.
She keeps harping on how finding out an abuser is also a victim changes things for her, it shouldn’t. I have a lot of sympathy for the young kid that Drake Bell was that got abused and that’s horrible, it is awful that he has lived with that. It is also awful that he inflicted that pain onto other people. Plenty of us survive abuse, and do not victimize anyone else being a survivor of it does not excuse being a perpetrator of it.
Imagine if Dan Schneider came out about being a victim… would she change her opinion and be understanding like she is to drake Bell? Of course not smh.
She legit is taking the gabbie hanna route of calling everyone narcissistic abusers. This is JUST LIKE when gabbie called jessi her abuser. When we ALL know gabbie is the problem and always has been
Anyone calling themselves a “survivor advocate” while failing to have considered the “root of abuse” is extremely misguided point blank period. You can successfully SUPPORT survivors without knowing much of anything, but productive advocacy is literally not possible if said “advocate” doesn’t have an in-depth understanding of what they claim to be advocating for in terms beyond their own experience. As someone who grew up on drake and josh, I wept when I watched drake bell discuss his abuse in the doc. At the same time, I was also thinking about his victims and continued to be devastated that they endured what they did. Similarly, I recognize that Alexa’s emotional unintelligence is possibly a consequence of trauma and I do feel for her in that regard. However as I said she is self-serving and clearly does not have the knowledge or emotional soundness to be an advocate.
She never felt right to me. I ignored it cause she was a victim but everytime she talks about anyone else and their trauma she brings it back to her and makes it sound like she has had it worse than anyone… it is not a competition
![Blox Fruits Dragon Rework Update [Full Stream]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/EqDAp8udhm0/mqdefault.jpg)
Ironically, her entire livestream is a perfect demonstration of why victim advocates DO need to be trained on proper trauma-informed practices. Experiencing trauma qualifies you to speak about your OWN trauma and relate to others on interpersonal levels, but it does not necessary qualify you to advocate for victims on a public or professional scale.
ALSO speaking of irony, she is threatening to release documents about someone else's abuse (Drake's victim) but lashing out at Kat for speaking to her stalker (or something to do with the stalker, I'm still confused on what she's saying there?). So Alexa is quite literally threatening to be the "Kat" in that situation to Drake's victim. She truly can ONLY see her own perspective and victimhood.
she really acts like she’s an authority in victimhood
exactly this. I am currently a psych major graduating next year and plan to get a masters in clinical counseling and.... i've lots of thoughts on alexa
Perfectly said
facts
Her recent revelation that Predators are often survivors of abuse themselves shows how ill equipped she is to lead abuse survivor activisim.
Literally her entire spiel about how she had no idea i’m like girl. That’s literally one of the most common things talk about with abuse it’s ‘hurt people hurt people’, i don’t believe for a second she suddenly learnt that i think she’s just pretending to to give her more wiggle room to operate in her reaction to the drake bell stuff
Yeah I feel like as a survivor myself that lesson is taught quickly and in a very unsavory way so idk why she didn't know that it's the first thing you learn or the first thing I learned when they tried the excuses
@@rabbit6546Yea, I'm not buying she didn't know cuz literally almost ALL abusers have been abused in some kind of way to be the way they are. It's way more rare for someone to just be born a bad person and still hurt people despite a great upbringing. Hence why we call it a cycle cuz we pass it on to others. Do we live on the same planet, how did she go through trauma and therapy and conveniently miss that part? I'm flabbergasted
So insanely true
Theres no way she didn't know; I'm not buying it one bit. It's just bs to cover her tracks at this point
I get that she's not great, but like as a survivor, I had hoped she would have enough respect to not release *sealed* documents. The _visceral_ betrayal is indescribable.
Sealed documents she PAID for, cause you have pay for that stuff. I watch true crime, I know what a FOIA request is 😑
@@FabiolaRVelayou can’t foia sealed documents- that would have to come directly from the involved parties and their lawyers.
Apparently the weren’t sealed…?
@@Naveen-tx8beI honestly feel like that's why she has gotten close to Bell lately
@@eevesjunkyardomfg this connects to what she said in the live
Saying "support all victims" while simultaneously using footage of Adam in a mocking way is wiiiild.
As a grape survivor, if I was brave enough to take my abuser to court and tell my story, I would be absolutely MORTIFIED if someone not involved in the case got those documents. If someone not involved in the case had the details of my personal story and the details of the events that happened. That's so unbelievably personal. It's not entertainment. It's none of their business. It's not information, for someone who wasn't even there that night, to use to decide whether I was telling the truth or not. Then to find out this person wants to post them publicly for everyone to see? Be for real.
Is it really so hard for people to understand that Alexa having those documents is wrong? No matter how she allegedly obtained them? Just because she decided to tell her story publicly does NOT mean that everyone else wants to do the same.
I have a feeling Drake Bell and/or his attorneys want them out there to remind the public he was once a victim and possibly whitewash his image.
I don’t know where the victims are from or where the incidents took place, but in my state there are serious legal protocols around privacy of victim information. We can’t share ANYTHING without a release of information, we have to redact anything that could possibly be made public, we have to inform the victim who and where their name is being sent. Police information has to follow chain of evidence. Not to mention this involves minors?!?! Who the hell is this person!!!
Im sorry that happened to you... and its so sad to see someone wanting to defend herself and caring more about that than protecting a survivor... what a shitshow honestly
@@mt3981freedom of information act. You can request it from the courts, some information can be redacted, some cases are sealed from such
@@mt3981it’s clear she got it in a non official manner but for her to face repercussions I believe it would be the victim/their family to make a report. In the EU privacy laws are so tight, even for finding out if you are suspicious about someone, the police can then inform if they are on the SO registry, or have any prior criminal history, occurs in a manner where no one else would ever find out someone did request that info
As someone with ptsd who is a clinical researcher in ptsd and substance use….Being trauma informed is NOT a magical tool gained thru experiencing trauma.
Say it again for the people in the back 👏
💔
Surviving abuse certainly doesn't come with a degree.
100%
literally this
right like isn’t the trauma enough why i gotta study now 🤦♀️
The fact that at the beginning she says it’s rude to tell people to go to therapy but later in the video her mom is tell people in the chat that they need therapy 😭
I know!! When is Alexa’s Guess Who? video on her mom dropping?
Her mother was terrible in that chat, resorting to saying "well, I'm a mama bear what do you expect?" to defend herself.
Couth. Compassion. Understanding. Maturity. Respect. I'd settle for saying nothing, love.
if i’ve ever seen someone who needs therapy, it’s Alexa for suuuure
@@PokeJoltz I’m a mama bear too. But if my child is ever wrong I’ll say so.
@@PokeJoltz Someone needs to tell her that she isnt a momma bear. She is in fact being an enabler-
"Do i stand behind the victim? I stand behind......... the victim's bravery" made me scream in the middle of the night like you dont understand omg
genuinely a CRAZY sentence
she’s annoying
my eyes rolled back so hard it physically hurt omg
Is that not a nebula star of a statement like is that not the premise of her entire CHANNEL??
As a former professional victim services worker she has had me raising an eyebrow from the beginning. She has always appeared to me as someone who is uneducated about abuse/trauma and who desperately needs trauma recovery therapy themselves.
In my opinion she has never done this from a place of education and advocacy, this has always stemmed from a desire for vengeance for herself. Part of that is a desire to bring attention to what happened to her (while leveraging other people's stories to boost her own). Wanting to shout your story from the rooftops is a normal part of healing but making a media/business circus of it is not.
Alllllll of my opinions were validated by her being *SHOCKED* that a perpetrator has also been a victim and being unable to hold those two truths at once. I cannot believe that never even crossed her mind.
This has never been about advocacy for her, it's been about fame.
You hit the nail on the head with her desire for vengeance! She is so clearly uninformed on effective education and advocacy in abuse/trauma recovery. I was a fan at first but as time went on, it became clear that she has not healed from her own trauma and watching her videos became such an uncomfortable experience. I felt like I was watching something that shouldn’t be available to the public. It’s so clear that she is seriously struggling and needs more help than she’s currently receiving.
Exactlyyyyyyy, and that’s why she was so gutted over finding out she’s not that relevant 😅
@@internetlawyer55 absolutely, she is the poster child for "experiencing trauma doesn't make you an expert in trauma"
@@lmnlsteseven if you did give them attention at one point, it wouldn’t be the same as being a perpetual victim as if it happened yesterday. I think that’s the biggest concern. Her story sheds light on a probably super common experience for child stars. However, we rehash it every video and it becomes unhealthy. I almost think she’s been frozen in time and headspace of her traumas earlier in life and can’t find distance from it, it’s really saddening.
10+ years working in domestic violence and sexual assault, 100% agreed.
When you said “Alexa wake up” my Alexa said “hi I’m here”
That is all.
Plz make a video about her ❤
She told me hi I’m here and she hoped I’m having a great day. At least one Alexa is making me feel better about the world.
@@lmnlsteswhy..
@lmnlstes waittt can you please tell my why because I cant find anything
My Alexa also responded!
she reeeeaaaalllly doesn't like being called irrelevant.
Gabbie hanna 2.0
That unhealed little hollywood brat is coming out in full force
Probably because she knows deep down that it’s true lol
Just narcissistic things
When a person gets this upset about being called irrelevant, you know it's about their ego.
i’m late on this but i have a genuine question: when kat is asking what alexa’s credentials are, is that not just to get more information to include in the article? like an introduction to alexa for readers who might not be aware of who this person is? like i feel like i’m going insane watching this woman get asked essentially what she does in the advocacy space, get insecure over not having formal credentials (which to my knowledge no one said she needed to have) and then proceed to project that insecurity onto kat. am i missing something here???
Her response saying to get credentials you just have to take a quiz like no????? Downplaying the credentials of trauma management and recovery is incredibly dangerous to do like i get it can feel invalidating as a victim to not have those accolades when doing advocacy but alexa is a prime example of how ppl who lead by personal experience w trauma rather than knowledge of how to handle and heal from trauma can be maladaptive and harmful for survivors
It is standard background information. Anyone would ask.
Yes, I'm a writer. It's for a sentence like, "Alexa Nikolas, a [blank] year old from [blank] who has a [relevant credential], told me over email, "xyz." That's all. This meltdown over a basic question is WILD
No ur not missing anything she just couldn't handle a simple question lol
@@rabbit6546and not only that but even if by some alternative reality it was “as simple as a quiz” why wouldnt she have gotten the certification??? Like bestie did you try to get it and fail the test???
She talks about Drake’s past as if she is the first human being to figure out that some abusers were also abused. She’s so ignorant about abuse that she really believes she made a huge discovery.
being an expert in your own trauma doesn't make you an expert in everyone's trauma
This 1000%.
Doesn't?
@@L.S.Artistry oops yes lol
@@rileywilford5856 lol I was like 👀
- Didnt address going to Drake Bell's concert
- Didn't address how she has different documents than the public released ones
- Continues to be a Predator Protector even while live
- Blames everyone but herself
- Thinks questions from a journalist are direct attacks
- She is so self centered the entire time that it's ALL about her
- Husband in chat being a 'mean girl' lmfao
- IRRELEVANT 💜
also im laughing so hard at people being like "Kat went to the bar with Adam!!!" but 1. doesnt know what he was drinking and 2. Adam is literally old enough in his own country to drink, sorry that America is different but that doesnt mean shit 😭😭 lord an 18 year old is not an "underage minor" get a grip
That irrelevant comment KILLED Alexa haha she was sooo hurt by that.
She is ALWAYS the victim even when it doesn’t pertain to her.
🎯
I may be mistaken but I think she did address the Drake bell concert no? Seemed like her long tangent about empathizing with Drake bell and “humanizing” him with his story he told was meant to tell the audience “I’m human, I felt bad for him so when I went to the concert, it’s cause I felt bad for how I treated him without knowing what he went through”. Now I don’t think that is justified. She wasn’t visiting 12 year old drake’s garage band, she was visiting a grown adult’s concert, an adult who knows right and wrong and has admitted to putting children’s well being at risk. I think she did address it but it was not good and does not speak great about her, almost like she could be easily swayed.
I used to really support Alexa in the very beginning, but after about a week of consuming her content, something about her was really off. She just seemed really dramatic and petty in situations that didn't warrant it, and her victimhood was starting to drain me. It reminded me of my toxic friends who can't go a second in a conversation without redirecting attention back to their personal traumas non-stop. I'm not doubting that she really did go through a lot as a child, but she really needs help to work through her victim complex. It's clear to me that she really does have a tremendous amount of very real, clinical triggere that she needs help for before she can continue on as a public figure.
YES! I understand that her trauma has probably caused her to have a hostile bias toward the world, where she feels everything is an attack, but like.. not everything anyone does ever is about you, and it’s difficult to take her seriously because of that perception
💯 unfortunately, spending thousands of hours in therapy doesn't automatically mean you've gotten better. There are a troubling number of bad therapists out there. I'm totally pro-therapy, my best Judy is a therapist, but you have to be careful. Therapists can be amazing and change your life for the better, but they can also enable you or even make things worse.
I don't really want to get personal about Alexa, but this behavior does not support her insistence that she is healed. if she's seeing a therapist 3x per week... What are they saying about all this? Are they supporting this behavior? It's a sad thought.
Same here her content is extremely draining. I used to support her too but I was turned off by how self centered she is. I always had a funny feeling but I couldn’t tell what it was. She victimizes herself so much, and is so histrionic imo. Now I see what it is. YIKES
@@irradiated_woman8016she needs a different therapist CLEARLY
Same, I saw an interview of her and I couldn’t quite place my finger on it but something about her was almost… draining to listen to. I am usually very invested in hearing about victims’ stories as one myself, but there was something about Alexa that seemed odd and it turned me off to ever seeking out her content. Not that I don’t believe her, but it kind of kept me from actively supporting her and her content.
All I can hear is Gabbie Hannah's voice "BULLIES!" every time she says bullies.
I KNEW THIS FELT FAMILIAR YES
Literally
HELP me HELP me
"HIGH SCHOOL ******* BULLIES" (cause she doesnt swear anymore LMAO)
this the one😢😂
"You didn't believe me, you didn't believe a survivor." This is interesting. To my knowledge Kat has never questioned the validity of Alexa's OWN experience of abuse (please anyone correct me if I'm wrong). The issue is that they disagree on SOMEONE ELSES experience of abuse (Kat believes Drake's victims while also believing Drake, Alexa does not believe Drake was guilty of the crime he plead guilty for). So according to Alexa, must we believe survivors on EVERY take they have? For EVERY opinion ever presented, we must agree because they have once been abused? This is a massively slippery slope that I do not think she wants to go down.
Using it as a shield to avoid criticism. She needs to take a hard look at herself.
yet Alexa is perfectly happy to hire the lawyer of someone who a potential podcast guest was assaulted by despite being pleaded with not to, or testify against a survivor in a court case on behalf of that person's abuser over a petty financial dispute
What’s interesting about Alexa is that she compares all situations to high school. Like a journalist investigating her claims is just a mean girl and a journalist asking questions is just a girl trying to ask pointed questions to hurt her, and anyone criticizing her is a bully. Unfortunately I feel like victims of abuse are often stunted in emotional maturity. Unless you do the work through therapy to work on yourself you might end up stuck at a mental age when facing your emotions. What happened to Alexa on the set of Zoey 101 was not only traumatic but it seems to have shaped her frame of view when it comes to interacting with adults that challenge her perspective. If you challenge her perspective you’re basically 13 year old Jamie Lynn Spears to her and that’s how she will treat you. Very unfortunate mindset to be in.
This comment is so spot on, I believe this too
You are right, I was like her and watching this makes me glad I got humbled instead of famous…. I am a far better human being now and if we realize we need to process each layer as it is revealed and life has new traumas that we will need to heal we realize this is more like hygiene. Saying I am healed is like saying I brushed my teeth, GREAT but also not the flex you think dear. Just because our world lacks emotional hygiene doesn’t mean doing the bare minimum is a flex. Like showering once a week wasn’t a flex a hundred years ago, but those that did were def ahead of the pack
you completely hit the nail right on the head. my thoughts exactly
Child stars do tend to be mentally stunted, that’s why she said people work a 9-5 at Starbucks 😂
I am so sorry, but as a victim OF a victim: the moment you perpetuate your SA trauma onto someone else is the moment you lose the ability to be overwhelmingly empathized with. When someone makes a DECISION to harm someone else based on what happens to them, you lose the shelter of victimhood. I’m so sick of this narrative that we need to feel bad for people who committed a CRIME. I will forever carry what happened to me, and I have NO inclination to pass that on to someone else. The “we are all humans” argument is meant to de-escalate the severity of their actions. Be so for real Alexa
Genuinely her refusal to say she supports drake’s victim and instead say she stands behind her bravery it’s incredibly telling to me, it’s a simple yes or no question like i am incredibly sorry for drake for what he want through it’s abhorrent and horrifying but at no point am i gonna place my sympathy with him over her
This perspective is so important
Almost every person that commits a crime has had bad things happen to them. They are still a criminal
The thing is, rehabilitation is absolutely possible. But drake hasn’t taken accountability for his actions, hasn’t openly discussed what he’s doing to make sure he ends the cycle of violence in his own life, and hasn’t come out in support of his own victims when hoards of people were attacking them online after quiet on set came out. He’s done nothing apart from coming out as a survivor himself. Using public sympathy and newfound relevance to further your music career is not taking responsibility or accountability!
If you abuse someone else , you are no longer a victim .
She seems very much the type of person who is 'if you aren't with me, you're against me"
her whole thing is that of you aren’t with her, you’re against every survivor
If I had nickels for everytime I've seen a predator hunter seemly with that attitude, I'd have at least two nickels (cough cough Chris Hansen cough cough) and that's not a lot but it's still interesting
The moment I realized that about her, I dipped out
10000000% this!!! It's what I struggle with the most. Girl you are absolutely entitled to your opinion, but SO IS KAT! There is no objective truth here, it is victims vs the accused and if you are choosing not to believe a victim that's your prerogative. Do not weaponize your own trauma against Kat and Adam for BELIEVING A VICTIM (the horror!! the worst thing they could do!).
Black and white thinking. Very common in trauma survivors. I myself had to slowly chip away at mine and I still grapple with it even with therapy.
But uh. Most of us dont try to preform advocacy work without the therapy and training needed beforehand!
So much for them being in support of women; the “kitty kat” comment from her husband is so misogynistic.
Ah yes, a staple tactic of misogyny; degrade, infantilize, and sexualize all in the same sentence. He managed to do it in 8 letters.
Very concerning that a person who claims to be an advocate for survivors is enabling their spouse to weaponize misogynistic language against someone as a means of suppressing their speaking out against your harmful actions.
And then being comfortable with those sentiments being echoed by your chat and your own mother? What a very emotionally unsafe atmosphere. Part of why I un-subbed and cancelled my membership was because I felt like I was smelling these vibes several months ago, and it's sad to see that in that time it's gotten worse, and those smells were coming from a very really rotted, moldy structure that has only kept growing.
This, and the stark lack of survivor/trauma informed conversations, the lack of nuance, the self-centering that kept occurring, so many things led me to leaving the channel, ending my membership, and disengaging from her platforms fully. I don't feel like we can make a lot of progress for victims if we are comfortably and loudly promoting misogynists and the tenets of their beliefs.
it was so weird😭
He’s such a creep.
Seriously, he has no argument so he defaults to insults. It’s gross and demeaning.
Let's say Dan Schneider said tomorrow he had been a victim himself when he was a kid, would Alexa now have a different perspective and forgive all the harm he did?!
THIS!!!
Exactly... i guess we excuse all abusers from now on.... uugghhh
I think she would still stand against him but only bc she was personally affected by the situation
Bc i genuinely believe that alexa's advocacy for survivors only extends to herself, and to people whose stories it would be beneficial for her to cover
This comment needs more likes
Great point
Finally hearing a RUclipsr react like I would (f*** off, f*** you, etc etc) is so refreshing omg. I love you 😂
yessssss !
Wow. I pulled away from her months ago simply because it was apparent then that she made all of this about herself instead of the survivors and the overall message. Now that is a proven fact.
She blocked me on her RUclips channel after I told her she was wrong about something. I was so excited for her lives until then.
Yep same here, only I got confirmation when she ran away when ppl called her out for defending Drake all of a sudden. That was the moment I knew she sucked and only cared about herself.
Same here
i did too i cant stand her her voice annoyed me a lot i dont like her policts
She keeps retraumatizing herself she needs to be in another line of work. This is destroying her mental health and the people she's claiming to help.
No. She is speaking her Truth and her anger over people preying on others is correct. Plus this is literally just the tip of the iceberg…this ‘club’ they belong to is much larger than people like you realize
I was thinking the EXACT same thing
Yup. This woman is so not well.
But this is what made her "relevant" so she made being a victim her whole identity and uses it as a shield to avoid criticism. She needs to take a break and strip down the ego.
@@tias78 exactly why it’s always been so awkward to listen to her repeat the same phrases over and over again, and this super weird mantra of “eat a predator.” like she’s just always on the edge of her seat to be angry and it’s not healthy, she doesn’t have a point in her day where she’s not working or thinking about that shit.
Kat: *asks neutral questions like you would expect from a professional journalist*
Alexa: This is bullying!!! Harassment!! How dare you not believe victims.
Alexa is so childish and self-absorbed.
@@oeurydice i wouldn’t exactly call the questions “neutral”, but Alexa definitely did self-sabotage, for sure.
To call it harassment really downplays what real harassment is, like girl no one will take you seriously if you die on this hill
@@klg4zyI agree it’s not neutral but they’re questions that can be answered authentically honest. Instead Alexa threw a giant tantrum.
On the flip side you have her husband saying Kat isn’t doing her job as a journalist
As a CSA survivor, if you are a survivor who goes on to SA a child, you are no longer a victim, you’re a predator and you deserve to be in a jail cell. *You* decided to perpetuate what was done to you onto others knowing damn well what it can do to a person. Shame on Drake Bell, and shame on Alexa for supporting him.
seriously like it almost makes it worse to me since they know from personal experience how life-ruining it is
@@card_boarddexactly
@@card_boardd exactly. You stop being a victim when you have a victim.
Lol knowing that the predator was also abused just explains things, it doesn’t excuse the act
Ok and? @@Chrissayla
someone in the chat said "the sealed documents came with drake bell tickets" STOPP 🤣🤣🤣
LMAOOO
chatters are so funny LMAOOOO
every time she uses being a survivor to justify bad behavior and get out of criticism an angel loses its wings
Also take a shot every time she says “as a survivor”
@@FabiolaRVela I was thinking the exact same thing. It's incredibly harmful to believe that everyone's story is the same. This is so very harmful.
Maybe she too is guilty and that's why she can defend Drake? Idkkk
@@FabiolaRVelaI'd be dead 10x over
idk what it is but listening to her stop between every fucking word is UNBEARABLE
this and the mouth noises 24/7
@@isabellawinti don’t even know if i can finish it i have Misophonia and its so fucking bad she is CHEWING her words one by one
@@isabellawintand the faces
Omg and im watching on x2 speed help
i’m actually so irritated lol the way she talks GRINDS MY GEARS
I honestly think her source for the documents was Drake himself or his lawyers. I feel like she isn't saying it because it will make her look even worse at this point.
Can’t believe I haven’t considered this holy shit. That is super likely!!! And she might have even thought they *were* public, just didn’t do any fact checking.
Drake would have had to given his lawyers permission
It’s the only way she could have got them
I was scrolling to see if anyone else thought this. I’m glad I’m not the only one who came to this conclusion.
That's what I think too.
“Believe Survivors!…. Except Drake Bell’s because he’s my friend now.”
- Alexa Nikolas; Founder of ‘Eat Predators…. Except Drake Bell because he’s my friend now’, Ultimate Authority on Activism, Most Important Victim to ever exist, & Drake Bell’s friend now
she only became friends with him to be relevant
John Wayne Gacy Jr was a survivor but sure, let’s ignore what he did because… it changed something in you to know he was a survivor. That’s literally how weird Alexa’s comments about Drake sound.
Asking someone if rumors are true is not the same as accusing them. GUUURRRLL, she's taking it very personally.
@@HunniebeeGames I'm from a small town and I'd rather ppl ask me if rumors are true than run with it behind my back, seems similar, I don't get why it's bad to ask at all
Her guilt is showing
23:44 i think she is subconsciously getting closer and closer to realizing that predators are people too, and that she is just as capable of victimizing others as they are. and that addressing the harm she has caused while healing does not invalidate her experiences that caused her need to heal. a classic sign of trauma is black and white thinking, and i am hoping she genuinely takes a break from the internet to become more comfortable with grey area issues and her own culpability
Agree. She’s soo close to getting it
very well said, this is exactly what i'm thinking as well.
ooh this is a good analysis
@@annakatie7347thank you! i wish i phrased it more clearly lol but i was having a lot of brain fog. i’m glad my point still got across!
The moderators in the chat ignored the Homophobia too
Omg yes!
@@msdouglas12100 it was just sad and petrifying, somebody already making homophobic slurs now in this situation
@@HaveanOreshnik I know I had to stop watching not a safe place
What’d they say?
i saw one say "i deleted the people who were sending adam hate" while alexa has adams video SHE made fun of up on screen lol.... she's so contradictive
As someone who is a survivor and struggles with my mental health, this was painful to watch. She’s paranoid and condescending and refuses to see anything from another person’s point of view. She never explains herself, just points fingers and gets defensive and calls others names. I hope she gets out of whatever self-absorbed spiral she’s in. Being a victim of EVERYONE you interact with is not a healthy way to live. 😢
“She loves to just say statements” why am I laughing so muuuuuch it’s 5am
Hi, I have a Journalism degree (for reference). The questions are absolutely fine. The first question is literally just a background question. If you don't want to answer, ignore or say you have no comment. Answering in this way just leads to self sabotage.
That’s what didn’t make sense to me, if she didn’t like or want to answer certain questions she could have just…. Not answered those questions?! And instead she decided to destroy her public image
if we have learned anything it is that she is not media trained and she is wildly unprofessional
Same, journalist here. The questions are absolutely okay. Alexa is going through something because this is not a normal response to an otherwise professional email...
Alexa being so angry about the list of questions is bizarre. All of those questions gave her ample opportunity to dispel any “defamatory” claims against her. It’s like she thinks those questions were Kat’s opinions rather than Kat trying to get the full story.
and media training should have prepared her for those questions since they are logical to ask to tell the story well….
This is like Twilight Zone levels of weird. A journalist asking questions (even questions about responses of accusations) is not a personal attack. Any ethical journalist would have asked those questions in this situation.
Exactly. In fact, it can be viewed as the opposite… they are acting ethically by giving you the opportunity to SHARE YOUR STORY, which is what should always be offered safely to survivors…
As someone who has experienced trauma, and has also been trained in trauma response, one does not equal the other. Experiencing trauma does not qualify you as an expert on trauma, and not if you're not mindful and cautious, you can cause more harm.
Anyone who feels comfortable publicly tossing around court documents involving a minor without the minor’s consent (oh wait, minors can’t consent!) has a serious problem and don’t deserve to call themselves allies for victims.
I’m SO happy you did decide to discuss this. I think it was necessary. Stand up for yourself even if she’s going through her own struggles - it doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be help accountable in the moment to only be held accountable when she’s in a better place (if that ever happens).
All this over an article that was NEVER EVEN POSTED because a journalist was doing her job by asking questions for both sides of a story because journalist are SUPPOSED TO BE UNBIASED AND SHOULD GET A FULL STORY. The article was literally never posted, whether it was bc they thought Alexa didn’t have enough following or something kat realized, it was NEVER posted and was completely dropped. How can you attack and accuse a journalist of so many things for just asking questions they never even released when you’ve seen previous work of theirs that proves they back survivors?? “Witch-hunt” THE ARTICLE WAS NEVER RELEASED
It's kind of funny how offended she is by being called irrelevant when she hasn't acted or done anything of real note in a decade 🥴
Ikr🤣 like it's ok to not be relevant in pop culture and adam didn't even say it personally but she kept referencing it like he's a bully I was so frustrated but laughing at the same time lmao
I can tell she has a massive ego when “quiet in set” came out she complained about the fact that they didn’t put more of her clips in it 😂, she also complained that she didn’t get invited to the last ep when they spoke to the former child actors who experienced bad treatment. It’s all ego for her ,all me me me, “as a survivor” blah blah blah.
Kat could ask Alexa “what’s your favorite color?” and Alexa would spin it to say that Kat is being racist and would say something like “I don’t believe in color, Kat. I don’t see color. How dare you trigger my trauma.”
Reminds me of the time in High school when the teachers told us to be SYMPATHETIC to the bullies that would physically and emotionally hurt us, because the bullies have “terrible home life.” Like, why are you telling us victims to just let bullies continue to hurt us?
A good argument against the whole "bullies have a bad home life" excuse. Is that the decision to soothe yourself with cruelty is an informed one
it's eat predators until the predator is someone who you're associated with also what's her problem with whiteclaws 😭
I imagine she has a traumatic situation that she hasn’t processed through enough yet that involves a white claw…. One case I read the girl was terrified of milk because she survived her throat being slit and she woke up as a child and tried to drink milk and blacked out when it leaked out of her neck so yea I would probably scream at the sight of milk too and lose my shit. But people need to stop enabling people staying in that state, we need to process and heal so we don’t harm ourselves or others.
@@JessicaPradoHanson I hope that poor gal is okay now. Thats. Yoof thats one heck of a thing to survive and to experience
@@elvingearmasterirma7241 I hope so too, I wish we got to learn more about the outcome of case studies like that more but there is rarely follow up. I think it would be valuable for humanity to learn the truth of what happens and how one can cope with that as well. The way the systems study this leaves out a lot of data that leaves us ignorant. I only know because my case is one of them so I keep healing and make videos about it as I can. But if the systems actually helped people heal- there would be more healthy people in good places.
Maybe this is rude, but I can’t stand her moral grandstanding. My eyes are about to roll right out of my head…
Lmaooo
All her statements are about how wonderful she is, just serving herself
So glad you decided to respond to this! I was flabbergasted by her response. Alexa, you are not the judge of who is a survivor and who isn’t. Take some time off and do some self reflection, as a survivor I was disappointed and disgusted.
Once again, Adam proves to be the most grownup person in any room
Adam always acting more grown and mature than people in their 30s and 40s even though he's 21
Why does 1 person feel they can speak for ALL victims? Who are they to determine who is and is not a victim? I can’t take people like that seriously.
She's so self righteous it's horrifying
As a survivor that has had to heal and move on she’s not healing. You can go to therapy everyday and not get any better unless you want to get better and let go of it. She’s stuck on the anger stage and she won’t be able to move on from this unless she lets go of anger.
I appreciate the intention of what she’s doing but maybe she needs to take a step back it’s clearly effecting her negatively
Not always , I suffered so much damage because it was 22 years, started at 2 weeks old.
Therapy isn't the be all end all. It definitely helped but these tools have limits
@@marisaistaBEST I think you are onto something here.
It is just so clear to me that she is too unwell and doesn’t have the level of insight (at the current moment) to do this type of work. That’s okay. Advocate y work is extremely retraumatizing at times, and not accounting for that ahead of time can end up resulting in a spiralling decompensation like this. I hope she steps away. It’s best for everyone.
And I want to add.
Letting go of the anger doesnt mean forgiving the one who hurt you. Its just so you stop focusing so much emotional and mental energy on them so you can focus on healing.
Also I dont care what her intentions are honestly. Once you start touching on survivor advocacy without you yourself being in a stable enough place? You start hurting those you claim to advocate for.
@@elvingearmasterirma7241 Agreed.. she needs to stop analysing other victims stories, that are sealed, where the perpetrator is already convicted...and then complain in the same breath about a journalist asking her simplr questions.. like dude, no??? How is that fair?
The weirdest part about this is that Alexa conflates herself and EVERY SINGLE SURVIVOR EVER!!! It’s so warped… I truly think she needs more help, she has truly lost the plot. It’s truly sad… good on you Adam for sticking up for yourself and Kat. Much love and God bless
she, her husband, and her mother all conveniently seem to miss all of the chats where you and everyone else ask all of the relevant questions
As a human sciences major, trauma informed care (TIC) is a LOT more than a quiz. It's knowledge of how trauma impacts development. How it affects children. Adults. Resource education. What is she thinking?????
right!!! I am a psych major and when she said that i was in shock, jaw dropped... really shows how completely uninformed she is and honestly under-qualified. she is qualified to speak on her own abuse and her own abuse only.
Hate how she minimized that so much !!
The thing i don't like about the sickalodeon tshirt is shes not the only victim from that show and doesn't know how having that shirt as merch will make other survivors of the network feel it just kind of shows how she centres herself rather than considering others
She’s VERY self centered
shes barely even a Nickelodeon victim. She got bullied on set. I got bullied at school am I a "school system survivor" now😭
@@tijanaself897 honestly! She got so upset that she didnt get invited back for the bonus ep of Quiet on Set like the bullying she received from other cast members was in the same vein as the other network colleagues' being on the receiving end of racism and literal assault; like not saying the bullying wasn't bad but it feels a lot like she wants to profit off her colleagues' trauma
It’s so hard to watch her spiral like this… I think she’s gone through a lot and had to protect herself to the point where she can’t take legitimate criticism as anything other than an attack. NOT an excuse, just very very sad.
I agree
I agree too im hoping she isnt evil and is just someone whos very unwell although it doesnt excuse her behavior i trusted her by watching her channel and boy i feel stupid😔 to good to be true although ive always had a weird feeling...
I myself and im sure alot of her subscribers feel betrayed and almost like i cant trust nobody
@@Poof-y8jaw... please remember that her actions are on her, it is normal and human to trust - please do not let her behavior shake your confidence in yourself. I am so sorry she betrayed your trust and let you down. It's a painful thing to experience. ❤️🩹
So theres a lot of overlap between Autism and PTSD and a lot of people in our communities struggle with Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria so I genuinely do think it is a trauma response for her to take even the least harmful bit of constructive critcism as an attack. I have sympathy from the angle of being an autistic survivor but at the same time, she does not seem to be equipped with the coping tools she needs to be at the forefront of this advocacy work and so in the public eye all the time
I watched her in the beginning but quickly realized she really needs therapy and probably shouldn't be doing this because all she is doing is reliving & reinforcing her traumas. It's like the blind leading the blind. She's not stable and in a good headspace to really do this in general.
Same.
I am a 22 year old survivor of generational sexual trauma and I will be the first in a long line of ancestors to not repeat the cycle. I have known since the time I reported my childhood abuse that perpetrators were usually once victims themselves. However, in the 10 years since then I have come to the belief that once the victim is above 18, and that line is crossed from victim to perpetrator, that person is completely responsible for their own beliefs and behaviours. How Alexa has acted during this whole situation has really highlighted to me just how stunted she is in her trauma process. She is still stuck in the victim mentality that many victims experience long after their childhood abuse. I will acknowledge it is incredibly difficult to come to terms with. Identifying and taking responsibility for your mistakes as an adult is completely necessary to live a healthy balanced life. The fact that she's fighting for Drake bell emphasizes just how strong her victim mentality is and how she extends it from herself to people she relates to. I think she needs a good long break from the media and to do the internal work needed to regain a balanced healthy mental health.
Just wanted to add that under 18 perpetrators I believe the parents are completely to blame for not getting the person the help they needed to stop those behaviours
Yoooo I am so proud of you!!! 💜💜💜
I feel like she may need some distance from her mother in order to heal - I do not know her, but I would recommend the same to literally any survivor with a parent doing moderation for them on social media/RUclips. That is not an example of healthy boundaries! Genuinely hope she is able to grow, heal, be okay, be safe for others... I want that for everyone.
She’s exhausting to watch. Who died and made her the victim ambassador? She does NOT speak for me.
Her mother in the chat just stirring things up explains so much about why Alexa is the way she is. I love and support all my kids no matter what, but if you're about to make a bad choice and go live to drag people online without a good enough reason to, im going to try to stop you. Find another way, talk with the people you have a problem with before you make yourself look like an ass being over defensive. Ill never get running to the Internet to deal with things unless youve tried everything else or the person is dangerous. But THIS, is internalized incompetence acting like "I dont know why everyone is so mad at me. I've done nothing wrong" Yes you did, Alexa, and you know it. Playing dumb ain't cute.
Exactly. That’s actual parent behavior: stepping in and letting them know the truth from someone that loves and protects them. It’s probably-to Alexa’s mom at least-not as fun as being an online troll but it’s the responsible, adult thing to do.
Her mom never really cared about her. She made her child actor and she left her in another state all alone. Where she dated a creep at 16 with no protection from anyone. Then she married that creep and got trapped in that marriage. She needs to realise that her mom never cared for her, unlike what she says.
@@houski4242564 It actually hurt knowing that Alexa is still desperately seeking that acceptance and approval from her mom so much, context doesn't matter anymore. She knows better but she sees her mom talking down to all the "haters" and showing her more "support" than she usually gets so she's eating it up. As a kid who was largely ignored and now as a mother, it's a horrible mindset to lock your kids into because then they start to shape their lives into what their parents want and lose sight of who they are. And they become blind to who they are. You should never put yr child into the position they feel like they have to earn love and attention from you.
Alexa is obviously responsible for her own actions and behavior but her mom should be the one feeling responsible for allowing her child to end up in this situation to begin with. So many bad choices for money and attention and now she is using her again for attention. The white knight mother protecting her daughter from the ravenous internet. I bet she feels so righteous for it. I could see her posting it on Facebook too, she seems like one of those moms.
Sorry, I'm rambling. It just makes it extra upsetting when you are a parent yourself and see the damage being done to people from their parents. Makes me want to analyze my own actions even more to try and not do any of this stuff to my kids cuz I have trauma from parents I don't want to put on them. They should be better than me, not the other way around.
Her mother is an enabler and Alexa learned a lot of messed up behaviors from her mom.
This woman has one of the biggest egos I have ever seen. This is the reason why so many good movements fail. Because they get co-opted by egomaniacs like this that use a good fight to further their own interests, whether that is to gain fame, money, adoration, or simply to be seen as "better" than others
Edit to say: she gave me Mamamax vibes right off the bat when I first saw her channel, got an icky feeling and left
the internal struggle of being like, live Adam now or Adam to watch later ?!!? 😩
both
I mean he isn't live soooo
@@classicstrawberry6633 what am i watching then😭😭is it the uploaded video lmao
@@louis2879yeah it’s just a premiere. It’s when a video is uploaded with a live chat for everyone to watch it at the same time and comment. But I think it’s a recording of a live he did earlier
I usually watch before bed during my post kids-to-bed decompression time but I couldn’t help but click it immediately today!
She needs time off of the internet. She needs time away from the advocacy. The way she describes Kat asking her questions as "abusive" and "retraumatizing" followed by her saying to Kat, "you revictimized me," is so troubling. She is in attack mode and she's not giving herself time and space away from the internet which is just fueling her anger - which causes her to post more videos like these - and results in her losing support for and participation in her movement. Her "I'm a survivor and if you don't agree with everything I do and say, you are an abusive bully" is harmful to the movement.
Alexa is making so little sense, I barely understand what she's mad about
Everyone is out to get me syndrome. That is thick level trauma reaction there. She's only being asked to prove what she's saying. But then has to treat it like people are out to get her. Its insane if she is offended by not being the most relevant victim out there. Maybe greedy-wanting to get shows and more attention from her victim brand?
Alexa Nikolas is a 32 year online bully. I don't find her to be a good influence anymore.
No she’s not a bully
Ok Alexa @@Lilothestitch24
@@banafanafofana6914 I’m not Alexa.
She really is!
@@brandee_anniee Lies. She ain’t no bully.
Alexa should tread with care lest she slide further into becoming an abuser herself.
Exactly
She already is emotional abusing other victims.
she already is, she leaked the documents
As a survivor.... Shes making me hate the word. She says it so many times, it's literally making me want to scream. 😭
I think you need to make merch that says “mean girl, mean kid, mean adult.” I would totally buy that shirt!
Me too ❤
When you say you are an advocate for victims and work with victims it is important to be trauma informed so you don't traumatize them more. Victims that do not work in the field of advocacy and mental health don't necessarily need to be trauma informed but it is just good in general wtf
I’ve worked in DV and SA for 10+ years, we literally have policies that disallow survivors from serving in a paid or volunteer capacity for the org for a long time and after a lot of therapy/healing. The work itself it traumatizing, it’s compounded with lived experience.
Having the training of trauma informed care is essential to keep from hurting the people you need to help. I hope she can take a step back and get some help if her ultimate goal is to uplift other survivors.
Her triggers are her responsibility.
Her commenting on what time it was in Ireland and asking if you were tired just shows she went live later hoping you would be asleep
It’s creepy. She’s always talking about not being in the drama bc she has kids so she’s too good for it and yet she’s sitting there doing the math to see what time it is for a 21 yr old RUclipsr halfway around the world bc they were too honest for her ego. Weird behavior in general and she seems like she’s triggered and spiraling 🫤😬
she lets victim hood lead her activism, she’d be more likable if she led with empowerment
That part!
If a victim's advocate leaked my court docs, oh how I would RAGE
Alexa is extremely delusional in the strangest ways…it’s no wonder people accuse her of using her victim hood as a means to become a real celebrity
I think maybe she started all of ... this... with good intentions. But I also think she's going off the deep end.
@@lisadgingersnaps9843I agree, but I also find it strange how while she was complaining about Nickelodeon and others “silencing” her…she was quite literally silencing people in her chat for speaking out on basic cues like the ones Adam is now mentioning…that’s what I mean by her coming across as not really caring
@lisadgingersnaps9843 they say the road to hell is paved with good intentions
I’m beginning to think so to. I don’t think it started that way fully, maybe?but I think deep down there was always that self-righteous feeling involved for her in fighting for other survivors
@@lisadgingersnaps9843 I think so too but money and "relevancy" make people do crazy shit. I think she even would've criticized the merch-selling if she had seen it from another victim advocate at the time.
I don't know the whole situation with who has been stalking Alexa or what's been going on with what she was referring to, BUT I noticed some dangerous wording used SO just to put this out there in case even one person doesn't know, if you are being harassed or stalked, do not refer to them outwardly as "MY stalker" and don't talk about them or confront them (I know it seems fucked up but to them that is giving them attention and in their mind more of a connection to you.) , unfortunately with they way their mind works it's like a challenge to them, if it gets escalated and they know they're getting to you it's something for them to feed off of and it sucks. It shouldn't have to be the victim that has to take charge like this but unfortunately law enforcement isn't very helpful and stalkers are unhinged creeps. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING YOU CAN. You should still get law enforcement involved because it's at least something, make other people like family and friends aware, even people like your landlord.
-Someone who's been stalked
I agree, one of the sick people that decided to stalk me was Gary Zerola and there are way too many dudes like him out there…. It took 5 women coming forward with rape allegations from their 20s for him to FINALLY go to jail. I am just lucky I listened to the voice in my head that said move after I turned down his marriage proposal on the 3rd date… I felt like he was going to break in and I didn’t care who called me crazy. Now learning he is in jail for raping a person in a similar way I think society needs to wake the fuck up and stop putting the burden on survivors if they actually want things to get better.
The person Alexa is referring to as a 'stalker,' is someone whom Alexa hired to be her publicist and then didn't pay him. I've seen the invoice.
Alexa and the documents is giving Jeffree Starr and that James Charles voicemail
omg, I forgot about that.... We still don't know from who the voicemail was, right?! Or if it ever existed..? 😮😅
@@MissSally95yeah we still don’t know if the voicemail ever existed or who it’s from
@@Breadboy11 crazy, I thought the truth would always eventually come out... but it's been like five years. 🤔
It made me think of that too
alexa seems like she wants to be the “professional victim”
“do you get the vibe kat doesn’t like me?” Well she surely doesn’t now
55:31 "you retraumatized me, you revictimized me, you made me not feel believed" ok. go to therapy. this is not kat's problem? go talk to your therapist about it. if someone online asking you questions triggers you this deeply, maybe it's not them. maybe you have some more work to do instead of just projecting your issues onto everyone else. nobody's "punishing" you jfc
and now that im actually at the questions im convinced this woman is fucking delusional
You can tell she’s losing her grip on a lot of her audience. Because once she pulled the questions up, ppl in the chat was like “wait. is this it?”
the fact that the first question "what are your professional experience and credentials for victim advocacy", which could have been taken as an opportunity to share your experience and the amazing work you've done, registered to alexa as an insult worth ranting about for full minutes is crazy 😭😭
"Never call me irrelevant again!"
Why is she sooo offended by it? Lol.. and why tf is she sooo bothered by legit questions? They are abuse? There's no rational thinking occurring anymore.
Every time she whines about becoming irrelevant, she just becomes more irrelevant
More than anything it seems like Alexa is offended because she is triggered, and she feels personally attacked because of her own imposter syndrome. To be immediately triggered by asking what credentials she has in relation to survivors... In my opinion, shows how much she must feel like she's not qualified or at the very least shows that she fully believes that is how others feel about her. She needs to fire her therapists. Three appointments per week.... And she is still this sensitive and reactive? This is such a bad look. Honeeyyyyy 😮💨😮💨😮💨
answering so many of the questions with “if you watched my videos ________”
she’s a journalist, not a drama channel? Her job isn’t to get information from content, it’s from having direct answers from the source
Ugh the way I am rolling my eyes so hard. The dramatic pauses, the cheesy lines, the tears and unhinged behavior... GEEZ woman. Alexa is truly an eternal victim, isn't she? And no one has suffered pain like she has or is wronged like her.
dude why can’t we just accept that two things can be true at fucking once? why is that so hard to comprehend?
I'm willing to bet Drake Bell is wishing she'd shut up. ✌️
😭 lmao
There is just something about Adam that pisses women in their 30’s OFF
I turn 30 tomorrow I’m scared I’m gonna wake up with a seething hatred for Adam
@@mirandajane62 same im 29 noooooo
I'm in my 30s, and I enjoy Adam. So don't be afraid
@@tayhenderson5051 looking forward to joining the 30’s muckers 😘
@@mirandajane62 Happy birthday for tomorrow 🎉☺️ Entered the 3rd floor last year and that’s the year I discovered Adam. You should be fine 😂🌻
She keeps harping on how finding out an abuser is also a victim changes things for her, it shouldn’t. I have a lot of sympathy for the young kid that Drake Bell was that got abused and that’s horrible, it is awful that he has lived with that. It is also awful that he inflicted that pain onto other people. Plenty of us survive abuse, and do not victimize anyone else being a survivor of it does not excuse being a perpetrator of it.
Imagine if Dan Schneider came out about being a victim… would she change her opinion and be understanding like she is to drake Bell? Of course not smh.
SO glad to see you responding to this, I get why you didn't want to but I'm glad you did and I think you have every right to
She legit is taking the gabbie hanna route of calling everyone narcissistic abusers. This is JUST LIKE when gabbie called jessi her abuser. When we ALL know gabbie is the problem and always has been
Anyone calling themselves a “survivor advocate” while failing to have considered the “root of abuse” is extremely misguided point blank period. You can successfully SUPPORT survivors without knowing much of anything, but productive advocacy is literally not possible if said “advocate” doesn’t have an in-depth understanding of what they claim to be advocating for in terms beyond their own experience. As someone who grew up on drake and josh, I wept when I watched drake bell discuss his abuse in the doc. At the same time, I was also thinking about his victims and continued to be devastated that they endured what they did. Similarly, I recognize that Alexa’s emotional unintelligence is possibly a consequence of trauma and I do feel for her in that regard. However as I said she is self-serving and clearly does not have the knowledge or emotional soundness to be an advocate.
She never felt right to me. I ignored it cause she was a victim but everytime she talks about anyone else and their trauma she brings it back to her and makes it sound like she has had it worse than anyone… it is not a competition
Adam Mcintyre- “Mean Girl, Mean Kid, Mean Adult.” I love it.