Caught that, too. Thought that was an odd thing to say unless she didn't know he was married initially and then he told her when she started developing feelings.
Right..?! This woman has no conscience! Like casual sex with a married man is just fine.. we didn't mean for it to ever last 🙄 she's had SIX years to convince herself that she's not some cheap trick and justify what she's doing.. trying to make herself feel better about the fact she's destroying a family, a marriage and 'settling' for seconds and being used..
I can’t stand anything more than the “I don’t owe anyone loyalty, they do” line. You got the power to do the right thing. Cheating takes 2. The cheatee is just as much of the problem as the cheater. End of story
@@BREEZYM6015 -- You are still married. Did you file for divorce. If you have been separated for 6 or months, why haveent you simply filed for divorce?
Her mind tells herself it is time to end, but clearly her heart isnt there yet to leave. She doesnt know what boundaries are. She doesnt know her own worth as well. Nobody deserves to be the side chick
Not sure it's denial. Sounds to me like she exactly understands the situation, based on her reaction to the question if the ever met his kids. She fully knows what this relationship is and that it's wrong.
Yup, no chance she’s gonna leave him even though that’s the obvious choice. I just don’t get it. Didn’t even have the ability to tell John that shes not going to. She knows it’s not defensible.
@straight.no.chaser1708 if that statement is 💯 right, it means that Alicia keys' husband is wrong for her. But only time will say if their union is right or wrong. Life is strange
I can't understand how a divorced woman will HELP destroy another woman's home and then convince herself she hasn't hurt the wife. John M should have given it to her.
@bovinebeautymoo2884 I get the intentional omission you've employed here. The key word in my comment is "HELP." That's why I said help. Yes, the husband is 99% responsible for intentionally betraying not just his wife but also their children. But he had an accomplice, and that person is the caller. Surely, she knew she was helping destroy a union, but she went ahead. She's gone through a divorce herself. She knows the impact on her daughter and herself, yet she turned around and did it to other people. She is a very wicked person.
The other woman has her own world going on. If your husband is attracted to her and giving her attention while spinning a story about how bad his wife is, she's not going to be sitting around feeling bad for your choice to marry a bad guy. The affair didn't screw up your life. The mistakes were made way upstream and were never resolved.
Who broke a marriage vow? She didn't. If he can't control himself around women then he shouldn;t be making marriage vows. If it was her it would be another women. The dude is pure scum.
The husband was the one who ruined the marriage but he didn't have an affair with himself so she definitely played a part. The delusion of this woman is something else.
I feel that too.. many people are just literally pulling most disgusting rationalisations to excuse their pathetic behaviour to avoid being alone and looking at themselves. WOW. Just wow..
Dating isn’t “hard” if you have standards and morality. 😂😂 she clearly knows she’s a bad person and is the problem in all her relationships… SO she keeps bad company 😂 idiots without self reflection will never move forward in life.
@@vaska1999 Believe it or not there are women out there who will actively participate in getting involved with married man, probably in hopes that she’ll end up with him permanently. And there are women out there who would never enter a relationship with a married man. Therefore, you’re just a guilty in the downfall of a marriage/family.
@@Alecram57 I'm not guilty of the breakdown of anyone's marriage, but I suppose you meant to say that the woman who accepts a relationship with a married man is as guilty as he of destroying his marriage. I don't see it that way.
She’s never going to break it off. She doesn’t seem to have the strength or self respect enough to even admit her role in destroying a family or the fact that he’s a terrible partner is stringing her along.
I have a friend who was one of three secretaries in an executive office. The executive was having an affair with my friend. His wife got tired of his cheating and divorced him. The executive immediately proposed to one of the other two women secretaries. He had been cheating on his wife with two out of his three secretaries. My friend had no idea and was shocked. So you never know if you are the only mistress. So don’t put yourself in that demeaning position in the first place.
She’s absolutely delusional if she thinks she’s the only one😂 that’s what the wife thought and yet here she is. She just moved into the place of constant supply just like the wife. He’s still looking around.
Wow. Less of a secretarial pool, than a mistress pool. Juggling two mistresses that work side by side, his deceptive skill level is off the charts. Plus, he seems to thrill on living on the edge.
This is why men get soo infuriated when their wife cheats because its always emotional meaning her foot is already 1 foot out the door. No matter how morally wrong it is, she still wants to be with him...which is crazy to men. When men cheat its to satisfy a desire but we don't fall in love with that other woman.
@@erichchan3Are you seriously saying a man cheating isn't as serious as a woman cheating?I'll just say this. Loyalty is everything to me. If your sexual control is little better than a dogs, I don't need you in my life. That kind of man can't be counted on for anything. No impulse control, no integrity, no honesty or loyalty....why would anyone sign up for that?
My ex husband had an affair during my second pregnancy. Long story short they are now married and have a child. They seem to be great and happy but man the pain they inflicted on me is so incredibly painful. I have healed and moved on but this changes people so much. Our children have paid unfair consequences.
I’m so sorry you went through that…I was NUTS during pregnancy. Such a vulnerable time. I’m so sorry you went through additional turmoil on top of the craziness of pregnancy. I hope you’re doing well now ❤
I am sorry you went through this... This is why I am never getting married!!! Dating I saw how many men are ok with dating multiple women simultaneously and how men in a relationship with you are ok with sleeping with other women etc. I also worked in urgent care and realize how many men have herpes and other STDs and don't care and don't plan on taking precautions to not spread it around!
@@bettysmith4527I know of 2 recently divorced women who decided to get back out on the dating scene. Neither was promiscuous and had met their husbands young and each had only been w their husbands; both started dating a new person (men) and shortly after ended up with STIs 😢 Both men were successful handsome, etc etc… it’s crazy out there 🙏🏼
@@lot2196I mean in terms of the decision making no. But her craftiness and the way she can manipulate to make herself sound like a victim and make herself sound like she's done nothing wrong is extremely impressive in a sick way
"I tried to extract myself from the situation, but..." one of my favorite song lyrics is "you can't throw gasoline on a fire, then say you tried to put it out."
'Correct' she's not smart and not wise. Time for a wakeup call. Holy hell. She's needs to correct her bad decisions and start doing the correct thing...'absolutely'😂
This woman has no self esteem. Every hint that they have a future and she sticks around for another year. She’s earned all the anxiety and stress and more.
@emilyh6293 I do agree that she has no self esteem but it angers me that the comments puts next to no blame on the cheating husband. She was probably very vulnerable and insecure coming off of a divorce and a man who had commented to another woman (more than likely) said whatever he needed to in order to get in her pants. Along the way, Yes she started to continue the cycle and chose to not wake up, and make stupid decisions to stay but for fs, where is the acknowledgement that he leveraged her emotional state to keep her in the cycle. And once she wakes up from her delusion that he has no I centive to change, she can start to respect herself and leave him too. He is no prize. She can wake up or enjoy this trash of a man.
@beac8238 well, your entitled to your opinion. If by 'derailing' you mean holding a justified amount of accountability on the cheating person, that is your perogative
I hope the wife sees this video and uses it in her divorce. She doesn’t deserve to be chained to a man who brings this kind of @buse. The potential for a baby, stds, a crazy mistress… gross.
WOOOOOOW😳 My mouth was gapped open the whole time in shock and rage at every single word that came out of that delusion woman’s mouth. What a disgusting waste of 6 precious years of her and her family’s life that she has selfishly absolutely destroyed. She has NO honor, respect, dignity, morals, and integrity for herself or her husband. What hit me the hardest was her COMPLETE lack of remorse.
Talking to people like this is SO frustrating! Ugh. They are a bit narcissistic, how they are so aware of what they're doing but don't see anything wrong with it. They justify all their bad behavior and don't care how they negatively affect others involved. They just plow over other people, but as long as they're getting what they want they're happy. All the, "Well you can't help who you like" trash aggravates me so much because it's always followed with these excuses and false 'proclamations' to change. They agree they need to change and know all the right answers, but it doesn't really sit with them. 😮💨 I hope she isn't stuck in this cycle like that cause if she is then she has been in the cycle for a long time.
I have never disliked anyone i haven't met, so SO much. She will definitely NOT break up with the guy, she thinks she's better than the wife and she 'absolutely' thinks she is the only side dish hes got.
The issue here isn’t that she doesn’t value herself. She loves herself. She loves herself so much she thinks she and her fantasy is more important than the wife and kids she’s destroying.
I so wish you had called her out a little more.. she wasn’t smart, she was delusional and able to make excuses and justify all her bad actions. There is a difference. She has no remorse and doesn’t feel like she’s done anything wrong. She’s completely morally bankrupt.
Probably told her that his wife is making his life hell, using him , will take all his money bla bla bla probably a liar. Deep down she knows. Since they have been friends for so long they must have a lot in common too. Hes a liar and she’s desperate enough to convince herself that she believes him.
I knew I was worth more than this. I left my husband 8 years ago and love being single spending lots of time with my kids. I really don’t see myself dating anytime soon. I was lonely in my marriage.
Infidelity is a dark cloud that will never dissipate if that's how a relationship began. Not even eventually marrying rectifies the ugly fact that the relationship started out as a secretive, lurid affair while one or both were previously married. The moral betrayal will cling to the relationship that was built out of something deeply selfish & ugly.
the caller is absolutely disgusting and trying to justify her actions. She is not leaving this guy out of 6 years. She knows shes way over the hill and won't be able to snag a new guy at her age.
This lady is smart, but when she said it was casual she never considered that this husband and father was NOT spending time with his kids, but with her...that was taking alot of time AWAY from his kids when they were elementary age to high school age..theres no getting that time back for kids..adults can make up 6 years as adults, but kids, no. Adults can all do what they decide, husband, wife, mistress..but kids are stuck in this mess...thats beyond selfish for her and for her married man
Cheating is series of making bad decisions, not just 1. They always claim to have gotten into this relationship accidentally, but it was a series of choices that led to this.
When she said " You know, men don;t want to divorce because of their children and they lose money" She has fallen hook, line and sinker. She is not going anywhere nor doing anything about her situation because she believes every excuse this married man has said to her. Boy, the holidays must be so lonely for her. But she just needs to hang in their because HE WILL eventually end things in a couple of years when he dumps her for someone younger.
I can only imagine the lack of love she experienced as a child. She has no self-worth. I hope she seeks therapy and can heal from whatever happened to her.
I have known cheaters with wonderful family upbringings. To say this is about outside circumstances is to ignore that she chose herself for six years over his wife and children. She esteems herself above ethics and the wronged family. Just curious, do you say the same when a husband cheats? Is the adulterous man a victim of lack of love that explains his destruction of his marriage and children?
Maybe, or perhaps she needs karma. I hope he divorces his wife. I hope Michelle marries him. I hope he cheats on her. Maybe then Michelle will understand.
It doesn't matter As a divorced woman herself she should know better than anyone how wrong this is. Saying "bUt mAh cOvEnAnT" is just a cop-out. Wrong is wrong
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Letting go of someone you love is always challenging, but in my situation, I had the guidance of a spiritual counselor who prevented my marriage from falling apart. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters..
I could really do without people who are having an affair with a married man or woman but think somehow they’re not as bad because they’re not the one who’s married.
I'm assuming she knew he was married when she first met him, and still chose to stick around for SIX YEARS and counting. She obviously has no self esteem to be settling for someone who can't give her all of himself, and then to hang on because she's probably afraid she can't find someone better. She has to spend every holiday without a significant other, hiding in secret, and settling for leftovers after his real life has drained him of most of his energy. She says she's not getting any younger, but continues to hang on for someone who, even if he divorces his wife, would never be suitable as a real boyfriend let alone husband. I feel sorry for the wife and kids, but not this side piece because it's her choice to live like this.
I'm 67 years old. My dad was a serial cheater and my mom stayed with him. (He was also abusive and a toxic narcissist.) As an adult, I have NEVER been able to fully trust or commit myself to a relationship. In the back of my mind, it's always been "will he treat me like my mother was treated?" To this side piece, if you're reading this...This might sound harsh, but I don't give a damn about you, or your cheating boyfriend. YOU should be thinking about what mental, emotional and spiritual damage you are helping to do to his children. And again, it's harsh, but you're scum if you continue in this relationship.
I was married to a narcissistic man and he was also a serial cheater. He would even bring them to our home and bed while I was at work. We divorced and he died.
She has to constantly repeat these words because she's trying to convince herself of the truth John is speaking to her, but she knows that she can't deliver and carry out leaving the guy
Woooow "wrong situation, right person?" What a deception she has convinced herself to believe. I'm glad Delony called her out on the blaming and deflections she was doing. No doubt if this affair was never exposed by the wife, they would have continued. The caller is more upset with the deleterious consequences of the secretive affair than the affair itself. There was no immediate punishment through the years of the affair, so they kept proceeding. Ecclesiastes 8:11 Because sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil.
When he said that there may be others on the side as well you could instantly hear her go into denial. She really thinks she’s so sparkly and special that this serial cheater wouldn’t cheat on her too! Lol! She is delusional and will end up alone.
Her say saying "yes, right, correct, absolutely" are all pretty much "I dont cares". She isnt gonna change. She chose all of this for 6 years. Shes pretty much like a deep drug addict. She doesnt and wont want to change.
Wanted to reference the last vid about bullying; from my xp: to anyone who's ever been a victim of violence because of their appearance, gender, orientation, race : DO NOT ever let a hateful notion 'there's something wrong with me' sink in. Trust me, it's a recipe for self hatred and compulsive anxieties later on. When we suffer and we need a break, it's only natural to think: maybe if I wasn't 'different', if I was 'normal' I would be accepted. No, haters will always find something else to prey upon. I've always had kinda androgynous look, which was a fuel for bullies when I was growing up. I embraced it, used it to my advantage in my acting / modeling career, I was almost the face of Leon in these new Resident Evil games :)
I get falling for someone who is married, you can’t help who you have feelings for. But anything past that was her CHOICE. Prolonging this for 6 years was her CHOICE. Now it’s time to stop living in fantasy and live in reality. Reality is he wants both of you and you’re settling for the crumbs. Demand more for yourself. Men treat you how you allow them to! Don’t like his attitude? Leave. Don’t like the way he treats you? Leave. The power has and always will be within you to live a better life 😊
Left a friendship for this my friend was determined and still remains with a married man for 10 years now. After getting married myself I couldn’t be around to support her choices anymore. It’s breaking up a family even if the husband says they are “separated” that man and her still shouldn’t be doing this.
As a woman, let me tell you something about women. She wants to "win" him. That's why she's hanging in there. She wants to be chosen, like that will justify everything.
A woman like this destroyed my family. She didn't stop until my father left us for her. It broke us and my mother. It took us many years to get over it, we were all a mess for a long time. Thank God, we are ok now. Women need to stop dating married men.
This woman thinks he will divorce his wife when his teenage children are grown. Oh my! I have an ex boyfriend from college who tried that one on me in the hope that I would bite twenty years later. Out of curiosity, I just looked him up. His daughters are pushing thirty and he’s still married to his wife. Ladies, stop being so gullible.
My friend had a crush on an engaged guy at work and he was definitely entertaining it. She waited a bit to talk to me about it cause she knew what my reaction would be. She was right. I read her the riot act and she thanked me for keeping her from making a stupid decision. It took 6 days of only flirting for her to know she was being ridiculous, not 6 damn years
The way he respects his marriage is the way he will respect your relationship too. Everyone thinks they're the exemption and nearly everyone is the rule.
“You’re assuming you’re the only one in the side..” “welllll…” girl. He literally has a wife. That’s proof you’re a side. He already has shown he doesn’t believe in loyalty. There’s other side pieces.
All of her wording says, none of this is my fault. I can’t get myself out of this 6 year relationship. Low self esteem wrenches like this never learn and she will stay for another 6 years. Even if he divorces his wife, he will not marry her. She’s addicted to this situation and needs to get therapy. She’s afraid to be lonely. I can guarantee she has no friends bc she’s a horrible person. She enjoys talking crap about his wife with him. It makes her feel better about herself. She’s pathetic.
When you want something sp badly, you paint a picture using watercolor that others can see right through. She wants something so badly that she refuses to see the wife as the true victim. She refuses to acknowledge her wrongdoing or stupidity or malice. This dream is a waking nightmare
I like the way he handled this. People mess up and make bad decisions and i like that he calls her out and also shows her a way forward to getting her her dignity back.
As a single woman in my forties I've been approached by married men through the years, but by God's grace I was able to stay far away from them, because I love and fear God. I've seen and heard a lot from women and not always single women go after married men. It is always off with her head, but people have no idea how complex some of these situations are. Some women really want to end the relationship, but these men are like snakes that lurk for their prey. And when they catch you in their web of lies they don't let go easily. They prey on lonely women with low self esteem and know exactly how to catch them. This is not an excuse, because I hate adultery, this just to let people know that it's not easy out there. That's why I never give my number, I don't text with married men outside of work and business and I always ask men who are interested if they are married or in a relationship. And I do my research.
I made the mistake of getting involved with a woman who had a similar lack of integrity. When we met she was in an 8 year affair with a married man. She asked me if I wanted to have an affair with her. I told her no, I'm worth more than that. She agreed and later told me she broke up with her AF. So, I started seeing her, and after a few months got engaged. Eventually I realized she and her AF weren't really over. Extracting myself from her was one of the hardest things I'd ever done. The lesson I learned is integrity is either something you have or do not have and someone who displays lack of integrity in one area of their life has no integrity in any area of their life.
she is making excuses, she is so WRONG!!!! she is a delusional!!!! she absolutely did do something to there marriage, she need to take responsible for her actioins!!!!
The absolute worst part of this is the fact that she keeps trying to justify what she did instead of just accepting what she did was disgusting. She is horrible person
I did this too, many year ago, i fell for a married man, and was his mistress for 4 years, you see they wont get divorsed, becouse they have all they want.. but you get drained, i did, i got a fatigue diagnose, deep sorrow. He didnt choose me, so I had to choose me,i had to choose not beeing a secread, the shame.. 12 years later i meet him again, drinking Coffee, i loocked at him, and all i saw was a paper doll.. it was nothing there.. what was i thinking..
I was a cheater for a long time and had someone like Michelle. They're perfect side pieces. I know she's not going to go anywhere. She believes just because we have a connection that it means anything. DUH!!!!! Don't you think we would click on something, anything? OF COURSE!!!! Go out and meet 3 other guys. You definitely will click with one of them. But do you Michelle, it's your life. You put yourself in the perfect position for the husband and he's laughing at you every day, and you think it's a "CONNECTION"
Why would he get divorced when he can have both?
This is how it ends up happening 99.99% of the time. And somehow these APs never realize this. One of the strangest phenomena there is.
Bingo.
Exactly
@Bongesbob2024 he literally does have both. Right now. And it looks like she’s not leaving him. That’s the point.
bingo...90% of the time they don't leave the marriage. why should they if they can have their cake and eat it too?
Someone else's spouse is not your soulmate.
Don’t let your spouse keep you from finding your soulmate ;-)
Don’t get married until you find your “soul mate”. 😉@@CoachDanielPaulino
😂😂😂😂 idk why this made me laugh , it’s so basic but she’s delulu
🎯🎯🎯
Could be otherwise how do you explain that 7%.. But it a HUGE gamble.
Im sure we all collectively screamed NOOO!!! 6 years!!! Thats a choice. She's not asking for advice, she's asking for permission 🙄
100%
Yessss!!!!
This!!! 👆👆👆
This is exactly what l got out of her conversation..
oh I was screaming in response to her arguments!!!!!!!!! Oh FFS, sooo brainless.
That's what I thought too. And at her age, with fully grown kids....it's embarrassing!
Six years is like whole new relationship or marriage if she chosen not to be with a married man.
She says “I thought it would just be casual” as if casually having sex with a married man is ok!
She is stupid as hell!
I heard that ! Selfish
Caught that, too. Thought that was an odd thing to say unless she didn't know he was married initially and then he told her when she started developing feelings.
Right..?!
This woman has no conscience! Like casual sex with a married man is just fine.. we didn't mean for it to ever last 🙄 she's had SIX years to convince herself that she's not some cheap trick and justify what she's doing.. trying to make herself feel better about the fact she's destroying a family, a marriage and 'settling' for seconds and being used..
To her it was casual… to him it was BROKEN Vows!
Married people are off limits. They might want to cheat but you don’t have to contribute to that!
I'm legally married but we live in separate states and have no feelings for each other beyond being friends so that comment doesn't apply to me. 😂
I can’t stand anything more than the “I don’t owe anyone loyalty, they do” line. You got the power to do the right thing. Cheating takes 2. The cheatee is just as much of the problem as the cheater. End of story
Why? If they are both jiggy with it they are adults.
@@BREEZYM6015 -- You are still married. Did you file for divorce. If you have been separated for 6 or months, why haveent you simply filed for divorce?
@@JustinCase780 So, being an adult = throwing your moral’s away
She has absolutely no remorse and takes no accountability in this. She is unbelievable in the most terrible way!
What should SHE have remorse about?
What should SHE have remorse for? She’s not married.
@@hillarybillary21being a mistress
@hillaryhayman1 You seem to be more proof to never underestimate a woman's ability to avoid accountability.
@@hillarybillary21 being a home wrecker scumbag
I have no empathy for cheaters or their side pieces. I’ve been the one cheated on, and it is horrific.
💯 They know exactly what they’re doing. It’s a choice, not a “mistake.”
@@mercifulmermaidtarot2630exactly
Her rationalizations are disgusting.
She is not a victim here, she is a perpetrator.
One of two perpetrators. If the married man had said no, the affair would have never started
@@kimberlyporter9555 She could and should have said no.
@@djpuplexthey’re both wrong. They legit deserve what’s around the corner.
She is hot and they are having fun.
Exactly 💯
John really said: "You are sooo delusional, it should be considered a skill" XD
He complimented her bs-ing skills.
And she said thank you 😂
@kirstentubes that was the best part!!! 😂😂😂
She’s participating in this conversation with John but, what he’s saying isn’t sinking in. She doesn’t want to end this relationship.
she won't end the relationship. She knows that he is the best that she can get at her age.
Correct
Her mind tells herself it is time to end, but clearly her heart isnt there yet to leave.
She doesnt know what boundaries are. She doesnt know her own worth as well.
Nobody deserves to be the side chick
Yep, the mental gymnastics is crazy
She wont break up with him
She is in such denial and keeps saying “correct” to make it seem like shes gonna take his advice when she has no intention to
Not sure it's denial. Sounds to me like she exactly understands the situation, based on her reaction to the question if the ever met his kids. She fully knows what this relationship is and that it's wrong.
She loves living in her own episode of Discovery ID.
She’s wasted 6 years of her life.
Yup, no chance she’s gonna leave him even though that’s the obvious choice. I just don’t get it. Didn’t even have the ability to tell John that shes not going to. She knows it’s not defensible.
That's my feeling too when she kept saying "you are correct. and I take responsibility". I don't even understand why she called.
It's never the right person if he or she is already married.
Alicia keys' husband was married when they started dating....
@@jennpul1015so?
@@jennpul1015doesn’t make it right bc it’s a celebrity
@@devadii24 when I say that it was right??
@straight.no.chaser1708 if that statement is 💯 right, it means that Alicia keys' husband is wrong for her. But only time will say if their union is right or wrong. Life is strange
People who keep saying "I know" generally don't.
He flattered her vanity by calling her smart, so she clearly felt she had to live up to it by pretending to have a clue about what he was saying.
She does know better. She just doesn’t value the reality of the “better” choices more than she values the fantasy of the “worse” choices. 😢
@@WandersNotLostshe’s a narcissist, rules for thee but not for me
They know, they just don't care. They avoid reality and live a delusional life. People of no integrity and no morals. Disgusting
The other perspective is that he was cheating on his wife for **6 YEARS!!!**
That's so sad.
I argue that is the only perspective as it is based in facts.
@@fancynancy2888 true, the woman made it like his wife was inconsequential.
"You're assuming you're the only one on the side." Oh, snap.
I can't understand how a divorced woman will HELP destroy another woman's home and then convince herself she hasn't hurt the wife.
John M should have given it to her.
She didn’t hurt the Marriage… the HUSBAND hurt the Wife
@@bovinebeautymoo2884he also couldn't have hurt his wife without her help. She played her part
@bovinebeautymoo2884 I get the intentional omission you've employed here. The key word in my comment is "HELP." That's why I said help. Yes, the husband is 99% responsible for intentionally betraying not just his wife but also their children. But he had an accomplice, and that person is the caller. Surely, she knew she was helping destroy a union, but she went ahead.
She's gone through a divorce herself. She knows the impact on her daughter and herself, yet she turned around and did it to other people. She is a very wicked person.
The other woman has her own world going on. If your husband is attracted to her and giving her attention while spinning a story about how bad his wife is, she's not going to be sitting around feeling bad for your choice to marry a bad guy. The affair didn't screw up your life. The mistakes were made way upstream and were never resolved.
Who broke a marriage vow? She didn't. If he can't control himself around women then he shouldn;t be making marriage vows. If it was her it would be another women. The dude is pure scum.
"I did not ruin their marriage..." I mean, you didn't help it either and involved yourself in this crazy mess😂
Exactly. That's her soul trying to justify her actions whilst fully knowing she's totally in the wrong.
Women are so pathetic.
"I didn't ruin their marriage" um I want to hear if the wife agrees with that...
Yeah her so called justification is pathetic and I usually am very empathetic to people.
The husband was the one who ruined the marriage but he didn't have an affair with himself so she definitely played a part. The delusion of this woman is something else.
When she said "dating is hard" she doesn't think she'll find anyone else and can't be alone
Exactly, low self esteem will allow you to take a lot of disrespect.
She obviously knows what being with herself is like and also doesn’t want to do that either, and neither does the married man. 😂
If she wants to attract better people, she needs to be a better person.
I feel that too.. many people are just literally pulling most disgusting rationalisations to excuse their pathetic behaviour to avoid being alone and looking at themselves. WOW. Just wow..
Dating isn’t “hard” if you have standards and morality. 😂😂 she clearly knows she’s a bad person and is the problem in all her relationships… SO she keeps bad company 😂 idiots without self reflection will never move forward in life.
When you’re with a person and you know they’re married, you’re just as guilty.
Guilty of what? He's the unfaithful husband who's been cheating on his wife and stringing this other woman along for 6 years.
Nichole Kessinger can tell you. I bet.
@@vaska1999 Believe it or not there are women out there who will actively participate in getting involved with married man, probably in hopes that she’ll end up with him permanently. And there are women out there who would never enter a relationship with a married man. Therefore, you’re just a guilty in the downfall of a marriage/family.
@@Alecram57 I'm not guilty of the breakdown of anyone's marriage, but I suppose you meant to say that the woman who accepts a relationship with a married man is as guilty as he of destroying his marriage. I don't see it that way.
@@vaska1999And you're the low-value woman helping him to be unfaithful. They'll do it anyway, if it's not you it will be another one.
She’s never going to break it off. She doesn’t seem to have the strength or self respect enough to even admit her role in destroying a family or the fact that he’s a terrible partner is stringing her along.
I have a friend who was one of three secretaries in an executive office. The executive was having an affair with my friend. His wife got tired of his cheating and divorced him. The executive immediately proposed to one of the other two women secretaries. He had been cheating on his wife with two out of his three secretaries. My friend had no idea and was shocked. So you never know if you are the only mistress. So don’t put yourself in that demeaning position in the first place.
💯
Thats sad. Never trust a cheater
John tried to tell her over and over that he wasn't the only one.. but it was clear that this 'smart' woman didn't believe it
She’s absolutely delusional if she thinks she’s the only one😂 that’s what the wife thought and yet here she is. She just moved into the place of constant supply just like the wife. He’s still looking around.
Wow. Less of a secretarial pool, than a mistress pool. Juggling two mistresses that work side by side, his deceptive skill level is off the charts. Plus, he seems to thrill on living on the edge.
“I’m in a situation I’m having trouble getting out of.” It’s easy to get out of this situation, just walk away. You have agency
That’s her saying “I don’t want out”
people say "you're right" when they just want you to quit talking. Saying "that's true" is the phrase to look for.
This woman is infuriating to listen to
This is why men get soo infuriated when their wife cheats because its always emotional meaning her foot is already 1 foot out the door. No matter how morally wrong it is, she still wants to be with him...which is crazy to men. When men cheat its to satisfy a desire but we don't fall in love with that other woman.
Agreed
And so is John on this call. She's not smart, she's just a self-serving a**h*le.
@@erichchan3Are you seriously saying a man cheating isn't as serious as a woman cheating?I'll just say this. Loyalty is everything to me. If your sexual control is little better than a dogs, I don't need you in my life. That kind of man can't be counted on for anything. No impulse control, no integrity, no honesty or loyalty....why would anyone sign up for that?
@erichchan3 Men aren’t that different from women. They get attached to their side things regularly.
Last thing she needs is someone telling her she’s very smart and highly skilled. Her self satisfaction is beyond me
That’s how therapists build rapport.
This is the kind of woman that the cheater seeks, because he wants her finances to soften the blow of child support and alimony.
@@catherinewilke5583 wow…. I never thought about THAT!!!
My ex husband had an affair during my second pregnancy. Long story short they are now married and have a child. They seem to be great and happy but man the pain they inflicted on me is so incredibly painful. I have healed and moved on but this changes people so much. Our children have paid unfair consequences.
I’m so sorry you went through that…I was NUTS during pregnancy. Such a vulnerable time. I’m so sorry you went through additional turmoil on top of the craziness of pregnancy. I hope you’re doing well now ❤
I’m so sorry that happened to you. That is heart breaking to read.
Don't worry what comes around goes around. You cannot build a house on wet sand, it won't last!!! Glad u are moved on
I am sorry you went through this... This is why I am never getting married!!! Dating I saw how many men are ok with dating multiple women simultaneously and how men in a relationship with you are ok with sleeping with other women etc. I also worked in urgent care and realize how many men have herpes and other STDs and don't care and don't plan on taking precautions to not spread it around!
@@bettysmith4527I know of 2 recently divorced women who decided to get back out on the dating scene. Neither was promiscuous and had met their husbands young and each had only been w their husbands; both started dating a new person (men) and shortly after ended up with STIs 😢
Both men were successful handsome, etc etc… it’s crazy out there 🙏🏼
Absolutely no accountability
She is insane.
She sure in heck isn't smart.
@@lot2196I mean in terms of the decision making no. But her craftiness and the way she can manipulate to make herself sound like a victim and make herself sound like she's done nothing wrong is extremely impressive in a sick way
Sounds like someone who would go kill the wife. Pathetic and immoral
Wait until I tell you about the guy who broke his marriage vows. She didnt break any vows.
@@drn13355that does not absolve her of her responsibility, she's a middle aged woman who should absolutely know better.
"I tried to extract myself from the situation, but..." one of my favorite song lyrics is "you can't throw gasoline on a fire, then say you tried to put it out."
🫨🫨🫨
What song is that? Google isn’t helping
@@softscribbles salt by the devil wears prada
She cant possibly expect John to make it ok. And, no, she is not smart
That's exactly wut I was thinking
Definitely not wise.
'Correct' she's not smart and not wise. Time for a wakeup call. Holy hell. She's needs to correct her bad decisions and start doing the correct thing...'absolutely'😂
“It’s kind of like divorcing your best friend.” Yes. That is exactly how the wife feels.
Exactly !!!😲👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Yep she has no remorce
@@jennieg821 Karma will get her eventually!
I don't think so. She knows that the man she's chosen to remain with is a serial cheater, and such a man cannot possibly be her best friend.
I’m glad John is laughing at her! But she still doesn’t get it 🤦🏻♀️
This woman has no self esteem. Every hint that they have a future and she sticks around for another year.
She’s earned all the anxiety and stress and more.
Nah, she esteems herself over his wife and kids.
I don't believe she's leaving 😂
@emilyh6293 I do agree that she has no self esteem but it angers me that the comments puts next to no blame on the cheating husband. She was probably very vulnerable and insecure coming off of a divorce and a man who had commented to another woman (more than likely) said whatever he needed to in order to get in her pants. Along the way, Yes she started to continue the cycle and chose to not wake up, and make stupid decisions to stay but for fs, where is the acknowledgement that he leveraged her emotional state to keep her in the cycle. And once she wakes up from her delusion that he has no I centive to change, she can start to respect herself and leave him too. He is no prize. She can wake up or enjoy this trash of a man.
@@jewels2128he’s not on the call. She is. Stop derailing the conversation. It’s not productive.
@beac8238 well, your entitled to your opinion. If by 'derailing' you mean holding a justified amount of accountability on the cheating person, that is your perogative
I hope the wife sees this video and uses it in her divorce. She doesn’t deserve to be chained to a man who brings this kind of @buse. The potential for a baby, stds, a crazy mistress… gross.
The caller said the boyfriends wife also has had an affair
@@karynroeseler2652 according to the boyfriend, though. Who knows if that’s true, he could just be lying to the mistress to make excuses for himself.
I think most states are no fault.. cheating isn't really a thing to use in a divorce anymore regardless of STDs
This would not hold up in court.
WOOOOOOW😳
My mouth was gapped open the whole time in shock and rage at every single word that came out of that delusion woman’s mouth. What a disgusting waste of 6 precious years of her and her family’s life that she has selfishly absolutely destroyed.
She has NO honor, respect, dignity, morals, and integrity for herself or her husband. What hit me the hardest was her COMPLETE lack of remorse.
0 remorse or self awareness 😢
Talking to people like this is SO frustrating! Ugh. They are a bit narcissistic, how they are so aware of what they're doing but don't see anything wrong with it. They justify all their bad behavior and don't care how they negatively affect others involved.
They just plow over other people, but as long as they're getting what they want they're happy. All the, "Well you can't help who you like" trash aggravates me so much because it's always followed with these excuses and false 'proclamations' to change. They agree they need to change and know all the right answers, but it doesn't really sit with them. 😮💨 I hope she isn't stuck in this cycle like that cause if she is then she has been in the cycle for a long time.
I have never disliked anyone i haven't met, so SO much. She will definitely NOT break up with the guy, she thinks she's better than the wife and she 'absolutely' thinks she is the only side dish hes got.
Nailed it! 👍🏻🎯🎯
The issue here isn’t that she doesn’t value herself. She loves herself. She loves herself so much she thinks she and her fantasy is more important than the wife and kids she’s destroying.
*self loathing
Bingo
Tbh I think she’s just masking a lot of pain. ‘Idk if I’d marry him’, ‘I’m not young’. Sad individual all around
“of course I told him we had to end things immediately” after his wife finds out, how admirable her 😂
I so wish you had called her out a little more.. she wasn’t smart, she was delusional and able to make excuses and justify all her bad actions. There is a difference.
She has no remorse and doesn’t feel like she’s done anything wrong. She’s completely morally bankrupt.
This! 👆👆👆
Nailed it! 👍🏻🎯🎯
So a guy cheating on his wife is guilting her into staying? How does that make sense?
Probably told her that his wife is making his life hell, using him , will take all his money bla bla bla probably a liar. Deep down she knows. Since they have been friends for so long they must have a lot in common too. Hes a liar and she’s desperate enough to convince herself that she believes him.
I knew I was worth more than this. I left my husband 8 years ago and love being single spending lots of time with my kids. I really don’t see myself dating anytime soon. I was lonely in my marriage.
Well said. I feel the same way
Infidelity is a dark cloud that will never dissipate if that's how a relationship began. Not even eventually marrying rectifies the ugly fact that the relationship started out as a secretive, lurid affair while one or both were previously married. The moral betrayal will cling to the relationship that was built out of something deeply selfish & ugly.
That's why 97% will dissolve.. the odds are against them.
the caller is absolutely disgusting and trying to justify her actions. She is not leaving this guy out of 6 years. She knows shes way over the hill and won't be able to snag a new guy at her age.
🎯🎯🎯
And if she stay’s there’s 100% chance she will never have a chance to find someone else. Very sad.
This lady is smart, but when she said it was casual she never considered that this husband and father was NOT spending time with his kids, but with her...that was taking alot of time AWAY from his kids when they were elementary age to high school age..theres no getting that time back for kids..adults can make up 6 years as adults, but kids, no. Adults can all do what they decide, husband, wife, mistress..but kids are stuck in this mess...thats beyond selfish for her and for her married man
What makes this caller smart she’s a bum
So true
Well said. The cheater is betraying the WHOLE family, not just the spouse. The children and faithful spouse are innocent victims.
Cheating is series of making bad decisions, not just 1. They always claim to have gotten into this relationship accidentally, but it was a series of choices that led to this.
Yes, 1000 bad choices is not an accident.
Yep! A series of bad decisions that lead to cheating and then a series of bad decisions for SIX YEARS to continue cheating.
When she said " You know, men don;t want to divorce because of their children and they lose money" She has fallen hook, line and sinker. She is not going anywhere nor doing anything about her situation because she believes every excuse this married man has said to her. Boy, the holidays must be so lonely for her. But she just needs to hang in their because HE WILL eventually end things in a couple of years when he dumps her for someone younger.
I can only imagine the lack of love she experienced as a child. She has no self-worth. I hope she seeks therapy and can heal from whatever happened to her.
I have known cheaters with wonderful family upbringings. To say this is about outside circumstances is to ignore that she chose herself for six years over his wife and children. She esteems herself above ethics and the wronged family.
Just curious, do you say the same when a husband cheats? Is the adulterous man a victim of lack of love that explains his destruction of his marriage and children?
Stop finding excuses for this worthless piece of crap.
I love when people are thinking "I'm not the one cheating so I'm innocent".
She deserves her stay in relationship purgatory.
She needs therapy in the worst way.
Maybe, or perhaps she needs karma.
I hope he divorces his wife.
I hope Michelle marries him.
I hope he cheats on her.
Maybe then Michelle will understand.
That and a relationship with Christ.
I’m absolutely disgusted by this woman. Zero remorse for sleeping with a married man for 6 years.
She didn’t break their marriage vows… The HUSBAND did
It doesn't matter
As a divorced woman herself she should know better than anyone how wrong this is. Saying "bUt mAh cOvEnAnT" is just a cop-out. Wrong is wrong
@@bovinebeautymoo2884are you the caller? If you are you are a wicked person. You need divine help
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without her, I love her so much. wish I can get her back I can do anything to have her back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Letting go of someone you love is always challenging, but in my situation, I had the guidance of a spiritual counselor who prevented my marriage from falling apart. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters..
I will look her up online right now...Thanks.
You definitely should. You wont regret it
I could really do without people who are having an affair with a married man or woman but think somehow they’re not as bad because they’re not the one who’s married.
What an absolutely infuriating, narcissistic, naive person- nothing is her fault and everything happens to her. These two deserve each other imo
I'm assuming she knew he was married when she first met him, and still chose to stick around for SIX YEARS and counting. She obviously has no self esteem to be settling for someone who can't give her all of himself, and then to hang on because she's probably afraid she can't find someone better. She has to spend every holiday without a significant other, hiding in secret, and settling for leftovers after his real life has drained him of most of his energy. She says she's not getting any younger, but continues to hang on for someone who, even if he divorces his wife, would never be suitable as a real boyfriend let alone husband. I feel sorry for the wife and kids, but not this side piece because it's her choice to live like this.
God ain’t gonna send you another woman’s husband.
And if you ain’t marrying him, if he ain’t “the one”, why is she trippin?
I'm 67 years old. My dad was a serial cheater and my mom stayed with him. (He was also abusive and a toxic narcissist.) As an adult, I have NEVER been able to fully trust or commit myself to a relationship. In the back of my mind, it's always been "will he treat me like my mother was treated?" To this side piece, if you're reading this...This might sound harsh, but I don't give a damn about you, or your cheating boyfriend. YOU should be thinking about what mental, emotional and spiritual damage you are helping to do to his children. And again, it's harsh, but you're scum if you continue in this relationship.
I was married to a narcissistic man and he was also a serial cheater. He would even bring them to our home and bed while I was at work. We divorced and he died.
I dont think she goes 5 seconds wirhout saying one of those :
« Correct »
« True »
« Absolutely »
« I agree »
« Yes »
« You’re right »
Don't forget "I know" lol
She has to constantly repeat these words because she's trying to convince herself of the truth John is speaking to her, but she knows that she can't deliver and carry out leaving the guy
Exactly, all left brain, I didn't hear any emotions from this woman.😮
Correct, oh absolutely 💯 Absolutely
She is gonna wait for him to leave his wife. Which is never .. shell be there for him
God bless you Dr. John . You nailed it.
Woooow "wrong situation, right person?" What a deception she has convinced herself to believe. I'm glad Delony called her out on the blaming and deflections she was doing. No doubt if this affair was never exposed by the wife, they would have continued. The caller is more upset with the deleterious consequences of the secretive affair than the affair itself. There was no immediate punishment through the years of the affair, so they kept proceeding.
Ecclesiastes 8:11 Because sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil.
When he said that there may be others on the side as well you could instantly hear her go into denial. She really thinks she’s so sparkly and special that this serial cheater wouldn’t cheat on her too! Lol! She is delusional and will end up alone.
Her say saying "yes, right, correct, absolutely" are all pretty much "I dont cares". She isnt gonna change. She chose all of this for 6 years. Shes pretty much like a deep drug addict. She doesnt and wont want to change.
Wanted to reference the last vid about bullying; from my xp: to anyone who's ever been a victim of violence because of their appearance, gender, orientation, race : DO NOT ever let a hateful notion 'there's something wrong with me' sink in. Trust me, it's a recipe for self hatred and compulsive anxieties later on. When we suffer and we need a break, it's only natural to think: maybe if I wasn't 'different', if I was 'normal' I would be accepted. No, haters will always find something else to prey upon. I've always had kinda androgynous look, which was a fuel for bullies when I was growing up. I embraced it, used it to my advantage in my acting / modeling career, I was almost the face of Leon in these new Resident Evil games :)
She thinks this is the best she can do.
Her ego is a problem. Home girl needs to work on that first and foremost
He’s using her and she thought she was using him.
I get falling for someone who is married, you can’t help who you have feelings for. But anything past that was her CHOICE. Prolonging this for 6 years was her CHOICE. Now it’s time to stop living in fantasy and live in reality. Reality is he wants both of you and you’re settling for the crumbs. Demand more for yourself. Men treat you how you allow them to! Don’t like his attitude? Leave. Don’t like the way he treats you? Leave. The power has and always will be within you to live a better life 😊
“Correct” lmfao real smart people never admit it bc they know how much they don’t know
Left a friendship for this my friend was determined and still remains with a married man for 10 years now. After getting married myself I couldn’t be around to support her choices anymore.
It’s breaking up a family even if the husband says they are “separated” that man and her still shouldn’t be doing this.
As a woman, let me tell you something about women. She wants to "win" him. That's why she's hanging in there. She wants to be chosen, like that will justify everything.
A woman like this destroyed my family. She didn't stop until my father left us for her. It broke us and my mother. It took us many years to get over it, we were all a mess for a long time. Thank God, we are ok now. Women need to stop dating married men.
Your father is at fault too.
@@sloeberdoet YES!, but women should not date married men.
@@sloeberdoetShe knows.
She started dating him already knowing he was a cheater. Lol. You get what you deserve.
What is wrong with this women🤣
The marriage is keeping him from marrying you ..
If he wanted to leave the marriage to marry her, he would have.
these men just want to have their cake and eat it too. they don't leave if they think they can get away with maintaining both relationships
Both this gal and the guy have no integrity, and both are a huge risk for anybody
Why did she even bother calling?
100
This woman thinks he will divorce his wife when his teenage children are grown. Oh my! I have an ex boyfriend from college who tried that one on me in the hope that I would bite twenty years later. Out of curiosity, I just looked him up. His daughters are pushing thirty and he’s still married to his wife. Ladies, stop being so gullible.
Why would you even want to be with some who cheats on his wife with you? Look at the huge red flag right in front of you and get out!
My friend had a crush on an engaged guy at work and he was definitely entertaining it. She waited a bit to talk to me about it cause she knew what my reaction would be. She was right. I read her the riot act and she thanked me for keeping her from making a stupid decision. It took 6 days of only flirting for her to know she was being ridiculous, not 6 damn years
the way you get him is the way you lose him
The way he respects his marriage is the way he will respect your relationship too. Everyone thinks they're the exemption and nearly everyone is the rule.
“You’re assuming you’re the only one in the side..” “welllll…” girl. He literally has a wife. That’s proof you’re a side. He already has shown he doesn’t believe in loyalty. There’s other side pieces.
You can't expect anything good to happen by dealing with someone married . Period
Oh dear! No "buts", you are only getting in deeper, run!🚩🚩🚩
I appreciate Dr. Delony's honest reactions, specifically his chuckles at the nuttiness of what is said
All of her wording says, none of this is my fault. I can’t get myself out of this 6 year relationship. Low self esteem wrenches like this never learn and she will stay for another 6 years. Even if he divorces his wife, he will not marry her. She’s addicted to this situation and needs to get therapy. She’s afraid to be lonely. I can guarantee she has no friends bc she’s a horrible person. She enjoys talking crap about his wife with him. It makes her feel better about herself. She’s pathetic.
When you want something sp badly, you paint a picture using watercolor that others can see right through. She wants something so badly that she refuses to see the wife as the true victim. She refuses to acknowledge her wrongdoing or stupidity or malice. This dream is a waking nightmare
I love how she thinks she's the victim 🤦♂️
I like the way he handled this. People mess up and make bad decisions and i like that he calls her out and also shows her a way forward to getting her her dignity back.
As a single woman in my forties I've been approached by married men through the years, but by God's grace I was able to stay far away from them, because I love and fear God. I've seen and heard a lot from women and not always single women go after married men. It is always off with her head, but people have no idea how complex some of these situations are. Some women really want to end the relationship, but these men are like snakes that lurk for their prey. And when they catch you in their web of lies they don't let go easily. They prey on lonely women with low self esteem and know exactly how to catch them. This is not an excuse, because I hate adultery, this just to let people know that it's not easy out there. That's why I never give my number, I don't text with married men outside of work and business and I always ask men who are interested if they are married or in a relationship. And I do my research.
I made the mistake of getting involved with a woman who had a similar lack of integrity. When we met she was in an 8 year affair with a married man. She asked me if I wanted to have an affair with her. I told her no, I'm worth more than that. She agreed and later told me she broke up with her AF. So, I started seeing her, and after a few months got engaged. Eventually I realized she and her AF weren't really over. Extracting myself from her was one of the hardest things I'd ever done. The lesson I learned is integrity is either something you have or do not have and someone who displays lack of integrity in one area of their life has no integrity in any area of their life.
she is making excuses, she is so WRONG!!!! she is a delusional!!!! she absolutely did do something to there marriage, she need to take responsible for her actioins!!!!
I don’t think she wants to solve anything. She just wants to vent…
First and most obvious red flag, he only talks about getting a divorce AFTER he gets caught. And then he doesn't even do it.
It's even worse when you listen to this a second time. Smh
The absolute worst part of this is the fact that she keeps trying to justify what she did instead of just accepting what she did was disgusting. She is horrible person
I did this too, many year ago, i fell for a married man, and was his mistress for 4 years, you see they wont get divorsed, becouse they have all they want.. but you get drained, i did, i got a fatigue diagnose, deep sorrow. He didnt choose me, so I had to choose me,i had to choose not beeing a secread, the shame.. 12 years later i meet him again, drinking Coffee, i loocked at him, and all i saw was a paper doll.. it was nothing there.. what was i thinking..
I was a cheater for a long time and had someone like Michelle. They're perfect side pieces. I know she's not going to go anywhere. She believes just because we have a connection that it means anything. DUH!!!!! Don't you think we would click on something, anything? OF COURSE!!!! Go out and meet 3 other guys. You definitely will click with one of them. But do you Michelle, it's your life. You put yourself in the perfect position for the husband and he's laughing at you every day, and you think it's a "CONNECTION"
Wrong She's playing him until she finds someone better (and single). Today's women have it together.
@@stephanie7572 Oh Stephanie, honey...
@@stephanie7572 6 years? That's such a master plan 😅
@@stephanie7572
😂Right... are you really believing that bs you just spoke? 😂 You might be as delusional as the caller..
She doesn't want to let him down? She actually thinks he cares about her. Delusional.