31 things we love about Elyse… 1. she is authentic 2. makes us: smile 3. giggle 4. And think 5. She shows us her struggles 6. And victories 7. She is an amazing singer 8. Composer 9. Writer 10. She is humble 11. And beautiful 12. She shares her: fun recipes 13. Cool Crochet projects 14. Art 15. Photography 16. Book reviews 17. She helps us all: be healthier 18. Love ourselves 19. And Love others 20. She is BRAVE 21. Strong 22. Kind 23. Considerate 24. And hilarious 25. Her transparency is magnetic 26. and freeing. Giving us permission to be real too. 27. She’s always learning, and teaching us while she grows. 28. She’s incredibly childlike 29. But wise beyond her years. 30. She has integrity. 31. And makes it so easy to love her…❤ Happy Birthday!
Honestly, yes! Your brain did lie to you when it said this info wasn’t worth sharing. It definitely was and I want an aesthetic physical list of these to remind myself of them when my brain lies to me. 😊
Agreed! Consent can and should be able to be withdrawn at any stage... except for one. Afterwards! You cannot realise or decide afterward that the s*x horrible or the person was horrible, you were too drunk or embarrassed or ashamed or whatever. As much as SA can ruin a person (man or women) a false accusation of SA can ruin the accused person (mostly men!) for the rest of their lives. Saying (in voice or actions) "no, no, no" through the entire event is clearly a "no!". However, you can't say "yes, yes, yes" through the whole thing and then say or decide it's a "No" the next minute, day, month or year. You cannot rewrite history, especially at the expense of another person. Anyone guilty of r@pe should be imprisoned under the jail. But I also believe anyone who knowingly falsely accuses someone and ruins that person's life, should also be imprisoned under the jail. Let's face it, We women can and do have the tendency to rewrite history to our advantage and women (in particular) can be vicious in that way. Just because a guy is an @rse it does make him a r@pist. Likewise, just because a woman is half naked, it doesn't mean she "wants it". The same way men need to hold themselves and each other accountable, so do we women. Sorry, I'm climbing off my soap box now. I'm sure my opinion is extremely unpopular with a lot of women and will offend people and for that I want to say "oh well. Sh!t happens. Regret is not r@pe"!
I’m so happy you were brave & finished this list because number 29 was my most favoritest! “Your brain is a liar & it lies to you like a liar.” This anxiety chick needed that reminder, thanks for sharing! 🐣❤
One thing I found really helpful from studying behavior change psychology is that our brains are always working *for* us, not against us - it's always trying to ensure survival, even though that doesn't necessarily manifest in the most helpful ways lol. That said, our thoughts are not always facts and you don't have to believe everything your brain tells you :)
Elyse, on behalf of parents with neurodivergent children, thank you so much for the insight provided in this episode. Your observations are so on point with what I've heard from my own child and I really appreciate your retrospection from an adults perspective. It really helps me to reframe how I see things versus how my child perceives them. Again, sincerely thank you.
I am 62 and as I watched, while crocheting of course, I see a younger me who just learned all those things later then you did. I really enjoyed your list of 31. Have a great 32nd year and may it only be filled with good and lots of love. FYI: my husbands birthday is 8/24.
The fact that you quite on the "your brain is a liar" one is 100% why you shouldn't have felt self-conscious and I am so glad you finished. Also a lot of this was helpful and even if it wasn't it's awesome that you're sharing your perspective and I will always appreciate your perspective because you are a smart and kind human being.
At 37, I agree with all of this. Something that I wish I grasped sooner was that not everything that happens to you goes on some kind of scorecard. You aren't being graded on life. Life is just a series of stories you will tell one day. Some awesome, some funny, some interesting, some deep and meaningful. But if you set out to do something and it totally failed, totally bombed, and you feel so stupid for even having tried it... just turn it into a good story. Make it funny, make it "I can't believe I did that" or "I can't believe I used to think I wanted that" but don't hide failures in shame. Just because your parents made you feel shame for not living up to their expectations, doesn't mean you can't set your own expectations. And your new goal for you life can be to make and tell good stories with open, honest, and vulnerable confidence. Just like you, Elise. At 37, I still would not have the confidence to do what you do. Tell stories and help people. Thanks for sharing.
'Stay Bored' is such a good one. Took me years of rewiring my brain to stop finding comfort in chaos. Love hearing your words from your brain. You're a gem.
What my therapist taught me about boundaries: they are for your protection, not to change the behavior of another person. If the other person continues to cross boundaries despite your clear communication, the boundaries get higher. This continues until you need to cut them off completely for your own protection, if they continue to cross boundaries and do not attempt to change.
Sort of in the same light, getting divorced might be the best thing your parents could have done.for you if they were setting boundaries to protect you. I wish my mom had divorced my dad. But she prioritized staying married above all else because of how her parents got divorced in the 1960s and how that affected her.
This is my new favorite thing I've ever watched. I just got formally diagnosed with autism at 38 years old, and am learning to set boundaries for the first time in my life, and honestly nothing has spoken to me in my entire life the way this video did. Thank you so much for posting it. I am probably going to rewatch it 31 times today.
@@summerbiby1496 I'm not in the USA, so I don't know hoe it works there. For me in my specific country in Europe it was an 18 months waitinglist. First thing I did was going to my GP. And I asked her specifically for a referral to a place I knew they had knowledge about female presenting autism; for me that was key after years of therapists who did not see the whole picture because I was so good at masking my autistic traits (unconscious masking because I had no idea I was doing it). Even a very experienced phyciatrist who works at a facility for autistic people told me: You don't come across as being autistic to me! For me, the outcome and clearance was so worth the waiting and the diagnostic process. Yeah it was a hell of a ride, but I owed it to myself (because I needed help to come out from Autistic Burnout). I hope this gives you a tiny bit of an answer to your question.
I love this so much I have no idea if it’s an accident or not but I took a screenshot of this and sent it to my friend and said “this is the kind of support I like” 😂
The "No one completes you" evoked this image in my mind's eye: A tandem bike, with the partners alternating between who's steering/at the handlebars. At times, both partners are not always able to contribute equally to the pedalling, yet, together, they maintain their momentum. 💞
"Your boundaries doesn't change how other people behave, just how you react to the behavior." 🤯 As someone who struggles with people pleasing and boundaries, I've never thought about it this way. It feels comforting. And I'm so excited for the next video!! 📖
I am so so so glad you finished and posted this video. At 37, this is the best one of these lists I've ever heard. So much of it spoke to me. Thanks so much for sharing it!!
11:58 yes! Sorry your brain lied and said that list wasn’t important! Thank you for the rest of the list I loved it. And learning my brain lies to me has been the most empowering thing ❤❤❤much love!
Came here to tag this exact moment as well! The fact that you thought (and sounds like overthought) that this wasn't content worth sharing at one point is crazy to me! As someone who just turned 35 and realized I had wayyyy too many "should haves by now" attached to that number...this video made me feel SO much better 🩷🩷🩷 Super thankful you overcame the doubts and shared! Happy belated bday Elise!
You make me joyful and happy for a multitude of reasons. But the fact that you make me feel less like a broken goober is, in itself, an accomplishment of its own, and incredibly appreciated. But, you are just special. You’re intelligent, hilarious, quick whitted, a songbird, etc…but really what you do is a gift to what makes the world worth living. And just the authentic humanity of it all. Keep being EXACTLY as you are. From some random gal to another, you kick ass!
True!! Honestly, whatever you look for in the rooms, you’ll find. I was looking for hope and to learn how to live life in a different way and I found those things.
Social media is so refreshing. Just seeing someone I can relate so much too is so healing. Like i have hated myself so bad for way too long and this helps me.
I LOVE THIS!! And people ARE too casual about telling you to have kids! That’s a REALLY big LIFE LONG commitment that affects so many people! Why just off-handedly advise someone they should enter into that.
I recently binge watched ALL your videos 😅 I’m so happy theres a new one! All of these points were super validating to me. 1000000% worth listening! Thank you!
I kept watching this video on repeat, on Sat morning with breakfast while waking up, asit's soooo true! It was just another rainy morning in UK, finally switched off from work, and this vlog was just like cup of hot cocoa, soothing, reassuring and heartwarming❤.
@@RagdollRalphI have a few already recorded I just need to edit! I found that editing footage of someone other than myself made me feel like I was hanging out with someone all day and I got home and was drained emotionally 😂😂😂 so I have to edit those sparingly hahahaha
@@elyse_myersThat’s the most relatable thing I’ve ever heard! I thought there was something wrong with me bc I get drained by people so easily and yet I love people… And yet, you are a lovely, creative person who also has this issue. It makes me feel like I have value even though I can’t contribute to people in social situations much. I just need to find my niche.
1. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! I hope it was as spectacular as you needed it to be. 2. It breaks my heart that you, I, and millions of women were victims of purity culture. It still messes with my head 3. I am 54 years old and I needed EVERY ONE of those things (well, not the GED one but the rest) 4. I would LOVE to have this list published in a book/journal to read when my brain is LYING TO ME. (That liar of a brain) 5. Thank you for being vulnerable. It is scary. I'm a stranger on the internet and you make my life better.
I was welling up by the end. I'm glad you posted this and finished your list. It resonated with me and I wish 19 year old me (I'm 37 now) could have heard so much of this.
Thank you for teaching me the "How hard can it be?" mentality. Because of it, I am now studying something I had no idea existed and love the learning process. I would have never started the process without this. So from the bottom of my heart, you've changed my life and I will be forever grateful.❤ Oh and I loved how you made this video. So clever and funny and just felt like we were just hanging out at your place.😍 Happy birthday Elyse, you deserve all the happiness and joy.❤
As someone who wasnt diagnosed with ADHD OR Autism until the age of 31, so much of my childhood/high school/college makes so much more sense now. And now I make much more of an effort to understand what I am doing daily in life/work/as a mother. Learning something everyday
I’m very passionate about this. Me and Jonas talk about this almost every night and I think I’m like…becoming an adult at 31 because I’m finally healing from spending my formative years in church. 😭
@@elyse_myersIt's very, very sad to me. I am VERY passionate about this also! I am doing my tiny part to bring about change for sure with my own daughters, but also actively in the church, bit by bit.
It is so important!! I grew up never talking about sex which made me very anxious about it when getting married. The book “married sex” really helped me a lot to view sex as God designed it.
I LOVE how this randomly switches to the kitchen! This is awesome!!!! Your body goes before video and work and not the other way around. By not just editing this, it's giving such a great message!❤ You rock woman
These thoughts of yours, THAT diary, would make such an awesome book. Like a journal type thing with your quotes on the 'other' pages..... Those little breakers/starts to get you into writing yourself. The hopeful way..A journey with Elise Myers..... Oodles of love and appreciation. You are truuly awesome ❤️
Hope isn’t silly and “how hard can it be?” really spoke to me. It can be easy to feel foolish for looking up in hope or so scared of something that you never try it. Thank you for this list.
It’s 1000% worth listening to! I’m saving this video and rewatching on good days, bad days and any day I remember. Thank you for sharing some of what you’ve learned with us. Keep it comin’!
I think you're phenomenal. I'm 36. We share a lot of hobbies, and whenever I see a short clip of yours on Facebook, I share it to my closest. Because everything you say I relate to. Especially the crisis of self confidence you experienced during this list. Watching you overcome that and finish anyway taught me something I hadn't learnt before. Thank you. ❤
i moved into college for the first time yesterday and this was exactly the video i needed after getting ditched by my friends and having dinner alone. you’re an inspiration to me and this video, and your whole channel, is a good reminder to embrace the high highs and low lows. ❤
I love this!! Thank u for sharing Elyse! If these 31 things were a poster id hang it proudly on my wall. They were all great and valuable and important for others to hear. Even sharing what happened when u started to doubt urself and then fought back against ur brain' s lies to share them with us was powerful to see. This is why everyone says u are " The internet's best friend" because u keep it real and show us that its ok to be real also. Im 10yrs older than u but i feel like u are such a great role model who teaches me to be a better human and love myself better each time u share stuff like this. Happy Birthday to everyone's favorite online bestie!!
I'm very happy you gave this advice. Some I had heard/thought about before and truly agreed with, while others made me really think. From one Elyse to another, thank you for all that you do and happy birthday
No self consciousness needed! This IS important. I wish I heard this at 15, wish I heard it at 25, and I still needed to hear it at 35. You validated so many things for a fellow 30’s breaking into their own person. Thank you 🤍
This is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I have shared this with everyone I love and plan to watch it over and over when I need the reminders ❤ thank you!
At 45 I absolutely agree with all said! Wish I had someone like this 15 years earlier, although it's never too late! Another human being here with bunch of certificates from various trades and 3 different uni's without a degree and finally I am totally fine without one, doing my best... Goooodd (sound from "The Office"), Elyse, I love your wisdom and your content!!❤❤❤ So happy to share this reality with you☺️💫💓
I’ll be 33 in a couple weeks. Everything you said resonated and was incredibly helpful as someone that always feels wrong and behind in life. Thank you for your words ♥️
Elyse, thank you for EVERY bit of that, including being willing to share the processing of your second guessing yourself. I love that you share ALL of this. It helps.
elyse wow! you are validating me so much at 26 years old. my older sister and i are really different, shes 10 years older than me and always emphasizes the importance of having friends even though im super content with hanging out with my close group (like my bf and one or two other girlies) . i felt such a relief hearing you say its totally fine to not have 25 friends lol i simply do not have the space or energy for that. also so true about the getting healthy part and losing your circle a little - which again, im very content with! i look forward to your videos uplifting me and putting a smile on my face :) excited for book recommendations !
Fiction and storytelling, in general, is SO important. I do not think I would have survived this long in life without stories and fiction. I have learned so much and grown so much because of them.
As a 36 year-old in her 37th year, I agreed with every single point, including that this video was worth every second! Except maybe the motorcycle metaphor. 😂 But I can’t think of anything better, so you just keep on keeping on!
I love this idea of making a list of things you wish you knew earlier. It’s essentially a list of things you have learned about yourself and life… it’s a list of self reflection and personal growth. It feels healthy
The fact that you even thought for a second these wouldn’t be important! I could relate to every single one of ‘em. And also: Seeing, practically in every video, that your mind tries to play tricks on you and gives you doubts and anxiety, and you overcome it every time gives me so much hope and motivation that I can do the same with my brain. Thank you so much Elyse, I wish you the happiest of birthdays🤍🌻
I love these little pockets of honesty and vulnerability and passion you’ve been giving us. This list is so honest and sometimes obvious but I Needed to hear it so thank you Elyse ❤
the printer and coffee pot moments, things like that in this video give office blended with seinfeld vibes and i absolutely love it. Also love all the knowledge lol
Elyse, I started watching your videos a few years ago and you’ve been so inspiring for me, especially the way you talk about your self-doubt and insecurity as a neurodivergent woman. Please keep making videos for as long as you enjoy making them, because for people like me, it’s pushing me to move beyond my comfort zone and begin sharing myself, my thoughts and my art with the community. So thank you :)
I think it’s cosmic that you stopped right before “Your brain is a liar” because it was totally lying to you!! I’m so glad you shared this ❤ HAPPY BDAY ELYSE🎉🎉🎉🎉
I AM turning 32 today, and this is a helpful list. A lot of these things I am still trying to convince myself of, especially the one about your brain being a liar. I was just in one of those really bad seasons, and my brain was telling me A LOT of things. As I am slowly entering a time where things are looking up, it's easier to see that many of those things were not true. It is very helpful to see someone else having these same feelings and providing a reminder. Thank you for sharing! ❤
Same, I really needed the reminder that your brain is a liar. I once saw a bumper sticker that said: “You don’t have to believe everything you think” and this sums it up too.
I just want to say that your videos are just so relatable and genuine. I am a mom of two boys that loves to crochet and bake. I feel like I’m catching up with a friend watching your videos! Thank you for sharing and please know your voice really does make an amazing impact! Happy Birthday Elyse☺️🩵
As a 39-year-old, I completely and wholeheartedly agree with this list! Thank you so much for putting it out there! I might need to write this list out myself 😁 I'm not on the spectrum, but my husband and son are. I wish I knew more about autism sooner so I could have been a better help to them. Also, while I am still a Christian and attend church, I agree with the way the church has handled sex. We have to be more open in our approach and discussions.
I love absolutely everything about you Elyse! ❤❤ these are all things i agree with! Thank you for being you and for finishing the list. Without you the world would be less magical❤
Love this list! I've learned some of these things along the way too and I appreciate you sharing. It's nice to feel a sense of solidarity with fellow humans on the life journey. Glad you second-guessed your second-guessing and finished the vid. This found me on a Monday when I needed to hear these reminders. Thank you! 🤍💖🤍
I will say tho. "Sometimes my husband is my only friend." was a big yikes for me! But that's okay because we don't have to have the same opinions. If it works for you, it works for you. I personally think investing in 1-2 intimate relationships outside of your nuclear family structure is very important for survival.
I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed this. 32 over here and I love hearing what other people have learned. I wish I could print this out and give it to everyone I know. Thanks for sharing!
The list is important because YOU are important Elyse! ☺️ Openly sharing your perspective & life experience has been helpful and comforting to a lot of people! 💜
I love these lists, btw. They're all little sound bytes that need to live in my brain. I am glad you didn't let your self-doubt stop you from sharing it. You're not self indulgent, you're awesome. As a bonus, you are training yourself to know that brain is lying when it says you're not enough. From one 31 yer old lady to another, I think you are super cool!
31 things we love about Elyse…
1. she is authentic
2. makes us: smile
3. giggle
4. And think
5. She shows us her struggles
6. And victories
7. She is an amazing singer
8. Composer
9. Writer
10. She is humble
11. And beautiful
12. She shares her:
fun recipes
13. Cool Crochet projects
14. Art
15. Photography
16. Book reviews
17. She helps us all: be healthier
18. Love ourselves
19. And Love others
20. She is BRAVE
21. Strong
22. Kind
23. Considerate
24. And hilarious
25. Her transparency is magnetic
26. and freeing. Giving us permission to be real too.
27. She’s always learning, and teaching us while she grows.
28. She’s incredibly childlike
29. But wise beyond her years.
30. She has integrity.
31. And makes it so easy to love her…❤
Happy Birthday!
Aww! I agree with all of this!
This is so cute and spot on!
THIS. ALL OF THIS . We freaking love you 🥹
She definitely shares more than the highlight reel, and we love her for it!
I'm crying. I really hope she sees this your comment because it is so sweet and true. ❤
“Sometimes people hate themselves more than they love you.” That one got me.
I had to go back because I completely stopped hearing the video after that one.
A hard truth to hear out loud and so surreal to realize how many people have this in common.
Hurt people hurt people. So hard to love others when you can’t love yourself. Great message. Good to see you, Elyse!
I would like for this list to be published and distributed to the masses as required reading 😂👏🏻 Happy bday!!!!!
Hahahah thank you!!
Honestly, yes! Your brain did lie to you when it said this info wasn’t worth sharing. It definitely was and I want an aesthetic physical list of these to remind myself of them when my brain lies to me. 😊
You are so relatable and definitely worth listening to! You’ve helped me get chores done a few times by being the voice in my headphones 😅.
Ah, great minds!! 😁
Perfection
"Consent can be withdrawn at any time" should be plastered on billboards and tv all over the planet. Also, "Hope isn't silly" hit me hard.
Agreed! Consent can and should be able to be withdrawn at any stage... except for one. Afterwards!
You cannot realise or decide afterward that the s*x horrible or the person was horrible, you were too drunk or embarrassed or ashamed or whatever. As much as SA can ruin a person (man or women) a false accusation of SA can ruin the accused person (mostly men!) for the rest of their lives. Saying (in voice or actions) "no, no, no" through the entire event is clearly a "no!". However, you can't say "yes, yes, yes" through the whole thing and then say or decide it's a "No" the next minute, day, month or year. You cannot rewrite history, especially at the expense of another person.
Anyone guilty of r@pe should be imprisoned under the jail. But I also believe anyone who knowingly falsely accuses someone and ruins that person's life, should also be imprisoned under the jail. Let's face it, We women can and do have the tendency to rewrite history to our advantage and women (in particular) can be vicious in that way. Just because a guy is an @rse it does make him a r@pist. Likewise, just because a woman is half naked, it doesn't mean she "wants it".
The same way men need to hold themselves and each other accountable, so do we women.
Sorry, I'm climbing off my soap box now. I'm sure my opinion is extremely unpopular with a lot of women and will offend people and for that I want to say "oh well. Sh!t happens. Regret is not r@pe"!
“Happiness and health feel very boring when you’re used to chaos. Stay bored”. New life motto ❤️
I love the Paramore lyrics, "I hate to admit getting better is boring but with the high price of chaos, who can afford it?!"
“Happiness and health feel very boring when you’re used to chaos” 10000% and thank you Elyse 😭😭😭
I’m so happy you were brave & finished this list because number 29 was my most favoritest! “Your brain is a liar & it lies to you like a liar.” This anxiety chick needed that reminder, thanks for sharing! 🐣❤
Hahahah I’m so glad!!! ♥️♥️
One thing I found really helpful from studying behavior change psychology is that our brains are always working *for* us, not against us - it's always trying to ensure survival, even though that doesn't necessarily manifest in the most helpful ways lol. That said, our thoughts are not always facts and you don't have to believe everything your brain tells you :)
Me, too! I came to comment this exactly! It's so hard having to fight my brain all the time. Maybe that's why I'm always tired.
Not your brain lying to you just in time to read "your brain lies to you" 😂@@elyse_myers
This one, absolutely! And so many more on her list!! Love this video!
Elyse, on behalf of parents with neurodivergent children, thank you so much for the insight provided in this episode. Your observations are so on point with what I've heard from my own child and I really appreciate your retrospection from an adults perspective. It really helps me to reframe how I see things versus how my child perceives them. Again, sincerely thank you.
My dad was a dentist and he would tell his patients, "you only need to brush the teeth you want to keep."😊
My dentist said I only had to floss the ones I wanted to keep.
I am 62 and as I watched, while crocheting of course, I see a younger me who just learned all those things later then you did. I really enjoyed your list of 31. Have a great 32nd year and may it only be filled with good and lots of love. FYI: my husbands birthday is 8/24.
“Hope isn’t silly” hit me really hard. I’ve been going through it and it’s nice to be reminded that hope isn’t a silly thing to have.
I felt it as well. Hope seems to be so necessary these days.
Same. Also am going to do some hand embroidery today to reinforce the concept💚
The fact that you quite on the "your brain is a liar" one is 100% why you shouldn't have felt self-conscious and I am so glad you finished. Also a lot of this was helpful and even if it wasn't it's awesome that you're sharing your perspective and I will always appreciate your perspective because you are a smart and kind human being.
At 37, I agree with all of this. Something that I wish I grasped sooner was that not everything that happens to you goes on some kind of scorecard. You aren't being graded on life. Life is just a series of stories you will tell one day. Some awesome, some funny, some interesting, some deep and meaningful. But if you set out to do something and it totally failed, totally bombed, and you feel so stupid for even having tried it... just turn it into a good story. Make it funny, make it "I can't believe I did that" or "I can't believe I used to think I wanted that" but don't hide failures in shame. Just because your parents made you feel shame for not living up to their expectations, doesn't mean you can't set your own expectations. And your new goal for you life can be to make and tell good stories with open, honest, and vulnerable confidence. Just like you, Elise. At 37, I still would not have the confidence to do what you do. Tell stories and help people. Thanks for sharing.
What an amazing way of looking at it, thanks for sharing!❤️xx
Omg yes, that is perfect ❤
'Stay Bored' is such a good one.
Took me years of rewiring my brain to stop finding comfort in chaos.
Love hearing your words from your brain. You're a gem.
What my therapist taught me about boundaries: they are for your protection, not to change the behavior of another person. If the other person continues to cross boundaries despite your clear communication, the boundaries get higher. This continues until you need to cut them off completely for your own protection, if they continue to cross boundaries and do not attempt to change.
Sort of in the same light, getting divorced might be the best thing your parents could have done.for you if they were setting boundaries to protect you. I wish my mom had divorced my dad. But she prioritized staying married above all else because of how her parents got divorced in the 1960s and how that affected her.
This is my new favorite thing I've ever watched. I just got formally diagnosed with autism at 38 years old, and am learning to set boundaries for the first time in my life, and honestly nothing has spoken to me in my entire life the way this video did. Thank you so much for posting it. I am probably going to rewatch it 31 times today.
Congrats on getting your diagnose on the same age I recieved mine! Welcome tot the neurodivergent community :)
I'm 39. How hard was it to start the diagnostic process? I'm terrified.
@@summerbiby1496 I'm not in the USA, so I don't know hoe it works there. For me in my specific country in Europe it was an 18 months waitinglist. First thing I did was going to my GP. And I asked her specifically for a referral to a place I knew they had knowledge about female presenting autism; for me that was key after years of therapists who did not see the whole picture because I was so good at masking my autistic traits (unconscious masking because I had no idea I was doing it). Even a very experienced phyciatrist who works at a facility for autistic people told me: You don't come across as being autistic to me!
For me, the outcome and clearance was so worth the waiting and the diagnostic process. Yeah it was a hell of a ride, but I owed it to myself (because I needed help to come out from Autistic Burnout).
I hope this gives you a tiny bit of an answer to your question.
0:01 is when the vid starts
Thanks I had a hard time with where to start
I love this so much I have no idea if it’s an accident or not but I took a screenshot of this and sent it to my friend and said “this is the kind of support I like” 😂
Lol, your awesome @@elyse_myers
wow thank you very much lol
The "No one completes you" evoked this image in my mind's eye: A tandem bike, with the partners alternating between who's steering/at the handlebars. At times, both partners are not always able to contribute equally to the pedalling, yet, together, they maintain their momentum. 💞
Perfection.
"Your boundaries doesn't change how other people behave, just how you react to the behavior." 🤯 As someone who struggles with people pleasing and boundaries, I've never thought about it this way. It feels comforting. And I'm so excited for the next video!! 📖
"A little THC goes a long way" you have spoken to me 😂😂😂 sending love from NC!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for pushing through and finishing the list, and how apt that "your brain is a liar" was next. You were right, it is worth listening to.
I am so so so glad you finished and posted this video. At 37, this is the best one of these lists I've ever heard. So much of it spoke to me. Thanks so much for sharing it!!
11:58 yes! Sorry your brain lied and said that list wasn’t important! Thank you for the rest of the list I loved it. And learning my brain lies to me has been the most empowering thing ❤❤❤much love!
Came here to tag this exact moment as well! The fact that you thought (and sounds like overthought) that this wasn't content worth sharing at one point is crazy to me! As someone who just turned 35 and realized I had wayyyy too many "should haves by now" attached to that number...this video made me feel SO much better 🩷🩷🩷 Super thankful you overcame the doubts and shared! Happy belated bday Elise!
You make me joyful and happy for a multitude of reasons. But the fact that you make me feel less like a broken goober is, in itself, an accomplishment of its own, and incredibly appreciated. But, you are just special. You’re intelligent, hilarious, quick whitted, a songbird, etc…but really what you do is a gift to what makes the world worth living. And just the authentic humanity of it all. Keep being EXACTLY as you are. From some random gal to another, you kick ass!
They say #31 in 12 step groups all the time.."take what you want and leave the rest" it's really good advice if you're on a self help journey
True!! Honestly, whatever you look for in the rooms, you’ll find. I was looking for hope and to learn how to live life in a different way and I found those things.
I wish I was as brave as you. Ty for sharing & I hope you had a wonderful birthday!
in the midst of a profoundly not great day, opening youtube to see this definitely made me feel better. thank you so much for all you do
Ditto 12:31
Social media is so refreshing. Just seeing someone I can relate so much too is so healing. Like i have hated myself so bad for way too long and this helps me.
The motorcycle bit had me crying. 😂 Keep being you!! ❤
I feel like I’m gonna have to explain this to Jonas when we watch it tonight hahahaha
I'd buy a tshirt about being a complete motorcycle
@@elyse_myers 🤣🤣I believe Jonas might already have helmets ready for the whole family by the time he sees this. 💪💪💘💘
Loved the motorcycle analogy 🤣. Thank you for this 💕
I'm rewatching this multiple times until I don't forget the ones I resonate with
I LOVE THIS!! And people ARE too casual about telling you to have kids! That’s a REALLY big LIFE LONG commitment that affects so many people! Why just off-handedly advise someone they should enter into that.
I recently binge watched ALL your videos 😅 I’m so happy theres a new one! All of these points were super validating to me. 1000000% worth listening! Thank you!
I’m so glad you’re here!!
I kept watching this video on repeat, on Sat morning with breakfast while waking up, asit's soooo true! It was just another rainy morning in UK, finally switched off from work, and this vlog was just like cup of hot cocoa, soothing, reassuring and heartwarming❤.
Hi Elyse! Your book reviews are my absolute favorite! Please continue to do them! 🙏🙂
Next week will be July and August book reviews!!
@@elyse_myersFor my part I would love another Crumble Cookie hangout video with Jonas 🥰
(Ps. This was a really lovely video/list 😊)
@@RagdollRalphI have a few already recorded I just need to edit! I found that editing footage of someone other than myself made me feel like I was hanging out with someone all day and I got home and was drained emotionally 😂😂😂 so I have to edit those sparingly hahahaha
@@elyse_myers 😊
@@elyse_myersThat’s the most relatable thing I’ve ever heard!
I thought there was something wrong with me bc I get drained by people so easily and yet I love people… And yet, you are a lovely, creative person who also has this issue.
It makes me feel like I have value even though I can’t contribute to people in social situations much. I just need to find my niche.
Tessa Bailey and Jasmine Guillory are two of my FAVORITE romance authors! Highly recommend.
1. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! I hope it was as spectacular as you needed it to be.
2. It breaks my heart that you, I, and millions of women were victims of purity culture. It still messes with my head
3. I am 54 years old and I needed EVERY ONE of those things (well, not the GED one but the rest)
4. I would LOVE to have this list published in a book/journal to read when my brain is LYING TO ME. (That liar of a brain)
5. Thank you for being vulnerable. It is scary. I'm a stranger on the internet and you make my life better.
I’ll second that wish, for this list to be published in an Elyse “journal.” I’ll be first in line to buy it. I’m 76, and am inspired by your wisdom. ❤
All 31 things are soooo valuable!!! Thanks for sharing!
I was welling up by the end. I'm glad you posted this and finished your list. It resonated with me and I wish 19 year old me (I'm 37 now) could have heard so much of this.
Thank you for teaching me the "How hard can it be?" mentality. Because of it, I am now studying something I had no idea existed and love the learning process. I would have never started the process without this. So from the bottom of my heart, you've changed my life and I will be forever grateful.❤
Oh and I loved how you made this video. So clever and funny and just felt like we were just hanging out at your place.😍 Happy birthday Elyse, you deserve all the happiness and joy.❤
As someone who wasnt diagnosed with ADHD OR Autism until the age of 31, so much of my childhood/high school/college makes so much more sense now. And now I make much more of an effort to understand what I am doing daily in life/work/as a mother. Learning something everyday
Excellent list!!! Thank you so much for sharing this with the world! Keep doing what you’re doing!
#7! Absolutely yes! Untangling the what-I’ve-become-to-realize-as-purity culture trauma is incredibly important!
I’m very passionate about this. Me and Jonas talk about this almost every night and I think I’m like…becoming an adult at 31 because I’m finally healing from spending my formative years in church. 😭
@@elyse_myersIt's very, very sad to me. I am VERY passionate about this also!
I am doing my tiny part to bring about change for sure with my own daughters, but also actively in the church, bit by bit.
It is so important!! I grew up never talking about sex which made me very anxious about it when getting married. The book “married sex” really helped me a lot to view sex as God designed it.
@@elyse_myersdo you still consider yourself a Christian?
The Great Sex Rescue was wildly healing for me ❤
I LOVE how this randomly switches to the kitchen! This is awesome!!!! Your body goes before video and work and not the other way around. By not just editing this, it's giving such a great message!❤ You rock woman
Number one, Autism. The most relatable thing ever! Thank you.
Well it is, for some of us : )
These thoughts of yours, THAT diary, would make such an awesome book. Like a journal type thing with your quotes on the 'other' pages..... Those little breakers/starts to get you into writing yourself. The hopeful way..A journey with Elise Myers.....
Oodles of love and appreciation. You are truuly awesome ❤️
Hope isn’t silly and “how hard can it be?” really spoke to me. It can be easy to feel foolish for looking up in hope or so scared of something that you never try it. Thank you for this list.
Oh Elyse. I, like so many others, am convinced we’d be great pals. Thank you for your genuine content.
It’s 1000% worth listening to! I’m saving this video and rewatching on good days, bad days and any day I remember. Thank you for sharing some of what you’ve learned with us. Keep it comin’!
I think you're phenomenal. I'm 36. We share a lot of hobbies, and whenever I see a short clip of yours on Facebook, I share it to my closest. Because everything you say I relate to. Especially the crisis of self confidence you experienced during this list.
Watching you overcome that and finish anyway taught me something I hadn't learnt before. Thank you. ❤
i moved into college for the first time yesterday and this was exactly the video i needed after getting ditched by my friends and having dinner alone. you’re an inspiration to me and this video, and your whole channel, is a good reminder to embrace the high highs and low lows. ❤
I love this!! Thank u for sharing Elyse! If these 31 things were a poster id hang it proudly on my wall. They were all great and valuable and important for others to hear. Even sharing what happened when u started to doubt urself and then fought back against ur brain' s lies to share them with us was powerful to see. This is why everyone says u are " The internet's best friend" because u keep it real and show us that its ok to be real also. Im 10yrs older than u but i feel like u are such a great role model who teaches me to be a better human and love myself better each time u share stuff like this. Happy Birthday to everyone's favorite online bestie!!
I love your comments on Autism, thank you for sharing. ❤
1:59 🤯🤯 that's incredible... And I'm engraving it in my head. Reminder to self.
I'm very happy you gave this advice. Some I had heard/thought about before and truly agreed with, while others made me really think. From one Elyse to another, thank you for all that you do and happy birthday
No self consciousness needed! This IS important. I wish I heard this at 15, wish I heard it at 25, and I still needed to hear it at 35. You validated so many things for a fellow 30’s breaking into their own person. Thank you 🤍
As a person in his early to mid twenties it was really usefull as I feel like many of my peers quite lost
I’m so glad this was helpful!!
This is so beautiful. Thank you for sharing. I have shared this with everyone I love and plan to watch it over and over when I need the reminders ❤ thank you!
Your face when you said Vera Wang at 40 was old in your mind.......oh sweet child. 🙂
These hit so close to home. Especially the boundaries and friends things. You always make me feel less alone 💕
At 45 I absolutely agree with all said! Wish I had someone like this 15 years earlier, although it's never too late! Another human being here with bunch of certificates from various trades and 3 different uni's without a degree and finally I am totally fine without one, doing my best... Goooodd (sound from "The Office"), Elyse, I love your wisdom and your content!!❤❤❤ So happy to share this reality with you☺️💫💓
10:20 A relationship is like a train, you can add a second engine to increase the capacity.
I love this. Sending it to my husband right now.
I’ll be 33 in a couple weeks. Everything you said resonated and was incredibly helpful as someone that always feels wrong and behind in life. Thank you for your words ♥️
Elyse, thank you for EVERY bit of that, including being willing to share the processing of your second guessing yourself. I love that you share ALL of this. It helps.
Im 36 and all of these resonate with me. Happy birthday, Elise, thank you for sharing your life with us!
elyse wow! you are validating me so much at 26 years old. my older sister and i are really different, shes 10 years older than me and always emphasizes the importance of having friends even though im super content with hanging out with my close group (like my bf and one or two other girlies) . i felt such a relief hearing you say its totally fine to not have 25 friends lol i simply do not have the space or energy for that. also so true about the getting healthy part and losing your circle a little - which again, im very content with! i look forward to your videos uplifting me and putting a smile on my face :) excited for book recommendations !
I physically and emotionally cannot handle more than 2 friends so I’m with you!
Fiction and storytelling, in general, is SO important. I do not think I would have survived this long in life without stories and fiction. I have learned so much and grown so much because of them.
I’m so glad you finished the list and posted this, I love all of this advice! So refreshing, thank you
As a 36 year-old in her 37th year, I agreed with every single point, including that this video was worth every second! Except maybe the motorcycle metaphor. 😂 But I can’t think of anything better, so you just keep on keeping on!
Lots of really solid advice! I’ve come to many of the same conclusions, but you are a few years wiser than me. Thank you for sharing!!
I love this idea of making a list of things you wish you knew earlier. It’s essentially a list of things you have learned about yourself and life… it’s a list of self reflection and personal growth.
It feels healthy
Thank you for the complete list. I see a lot of myself in you and your advice is always good to hear. Thanks
The fact that you even thought for a second these wouldn’t be important! I could relate to every single one of ‘em. And also: Seeing, practically in every video, that your mind tries to play tricks on you and gives you doubts and anxiety, and you overcome it every time gives me so much hope and motivation that I can do the same with my brain. Thank you so much Elyse, I wish you the happiest of birthdays🤍🌻
dear Elyse, absolutely loved this thank you so much for sharing your wisdom!
I love these little pockets of honesty and vulnerability and passion you’ve been giving us. This list is so honest and sometimes obvious but I Needed to hear it so thank you Elyse ❤
the printer and coffee pot moments, things like that in this video give office blended with seinfeld vibes and i absolutely love it. Also love all the knowledge lol
Elyse, I started watching your videos a few years ago and you’ve been so inspiring for me, especially the way you talk about your self-doubt and insecurity as a neurodivergent woman. Please keep making videos for as long as you enjoy making them, because for people like me, it’s pushing me to move beyond my comfort zone and begin sharing myself, my thoughts and my art with the community. So thank you :)
Hard relate ❤
Crazy how much I can relate to this. Thank you for going through and posting it!
I think it’s cosmic that you stopped right before “Your brain is a liar” because it was totally lying to you!! I’m so glad you shared this ❤
HAPPY BDAY ELYSE🎉🎉🎉🎉
Such a good list! You’ve got wisdom, Kid. The only one I take issue with is the pumpkin spice 😂
Listen I prefer chai to pumpkin spice but it’s NOT POISON IT’S ALRIGHT TASTING 😂
@@elyse_myers I love a dirty chai! Okay, I grant you it’s not actual poison 😆😆
5:04 and sometimes people who are HORRIBLE PARTNERS stay married.
Love You Elyse! Thank you for this wisdom. I’m very glad I finally found your RUclips channel ❤️
I AM turning 32 today, and this is a helpful list. A lot of these things I am still trying to convince myself of, especially the one about your brain being a liar.
I was just in one of those really bad seasons, and my brain was telling me A LOT of things. As I am slowly entering a time where things are looking up, it's easier to see that many of those things were not true.
It is very helpful to see someone else having these same feelings and providing a reminder. Thank you for sharing! ❤
Same, I really needed the reminder that your brain is a liar. I once saw a bumper sticker that said: “You don’t have to believe everything you think” and this sums it up too.
I just want to say that your videos are just so relatable and genuine. I am a mom of two boys that loves to crochet and bake. I feel like I’m catching up with a friend watching your videos! Thank you for sharing and please know your voice really does make an amazing impact! Happy Birthday Elyse☺️🩵
As a 39-year-old, I completely and wholeheartedly agree with this list! Thank you so much for putting it out there! I might need to write this list out myself 😁
I'm not on the spectrum, but my husband and son are. I wish I knew more about autism sooner so I could have been a better help to them.
Also, while I am still a Christian and attend church, I agree with the way the church has handled sex. We have to be more open in our approach and discussions.
I love absolutely everything about you Elyse! ❤❤ these are all things i agree with! Thank you for being you and for finishing the list. Without you the world would be less magical❤
#19 hit hard…….I’m 56 and still waiting for grown up me to show up🤷♀️🤷♀️🔎🔎
At 54, me too, internet stranger friend. Me too.
Love this list! I've learned some of these things along the way too and I appreciate you sharing. It's nice to feel a sense of solidarity with fellow humans on the life journey. Glad you second-guessed your second-guessing and finished the vid. This found me on a Monday when I needed to hear these reminders. Thank you! 🤍💖🤍
Who Loves Elyse?
Many, many, many.
That's so freaking true. "They just hated themselves more than they loved me."
That printer is dancing!
🎶 💃 🖨️ 🕺 🪩
These are great! Very worth listening to, thank you for sharing!
I will say tho. "Sometimes my husband is my only friend." was a big yikes for me! But that's okay because we don't have to have the same opinions. If it works for you, it works for you. I personally think investing in 1-2 intimate relationships outside of your nuclear family structure is very important for survival.
@elyse_myers, You always bring the REAL story. Thanks for sharing. Oh and Happy Birthday too!🧡✨🧡
I can’t tell you how much I enjoyed this. 32 over here and I love hearing what other people have learned. I wish I could print this out and give it to everyone I know. Thanks for sharing!
You are a genuine blessing and i always look forward to your videos. Thank you and happy birthday 🎂 🥳 🎉 🎈 🎁 🎊
The list is important because YOU are important Elyse! ☺️ Openly sharing your perspective & life experience has been helpful and comforting to a lot of people! 💜
I love these lists, btw. They're all little sound bytes that need to live in my brain. I am glad you didn't let your self-doubt stop you from sharing it. You're not self indulgent, you're awesome. As a bonus, you are training yourself to know that brain is lying when it says you're not enough. From one 31 yer old lady to another, I think you are super cool!
I needed this today- thank you for sharing Elyse!!! You rock!!!
OMG!!! All of that was worth speaking & resonated with me! ❤❤❤❤ Thank you for making it.
It is worth listening to! Thank you for sharing this! This list and YOU are so important! ❤️