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One of the best Seinfeld lines EVER.
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- Опубликовано: 17 авг 2024
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"When you look annoyed all the time, people think that you’re busy."
~ George Costanza
George quotes are like brilliant proverbs
@@johnb2422 " The sea was angry, my friend, like an old man sending soup back at a deli." Yes John, they sure are. 😄
This actually does work!
@@ronvlaarsvar6867 I use it all the time. ;)
I've found the quickest way to get rid of someone who asks "What are you doing"? is to turn it around and say "Hey, I'm glad you're here, I could use your help but it may take a while". Nine times out of ten they'll say "yeah, but I'll have to get back to you.... I have some other stuff I need to get done first". Then they beat a hasty retreat. Try it, it works!
Probably my favorite line would be George when he's pretending to be a tourist -"If you take everything I've accomplished in my whole life & condense it down into one day, it looks decent." The ultimate procrastinator mantra!
'What's that smell. I'm sure the previous tenant had monkeys
“back to your job @ Tyler Chicken & yer three legged dog Willie....”
That is a pretty good one!😄😄
"SHRINKAGE!!!!!"
@@KARENboomboomROXX I was in the pool!😄😄
*Elaine:* You know, just admitting that another man is attractive doesn't necessarily make you a homosexual.
*George:* It doesn't help.
Not that there is anything wrong with that!
Imagine if they knew Chandler who even asked a man to ask him to marry him, gave a lap dance to his father in love and kissed a guy... and had homosexual hair 😍😍
Jerry: I find them repulsive and unappealing!
"I think it moved"!
@@WALDENSOFTWARE repulsive, preening pretty boys, or muscular jocks
"Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You don't stare at it. It's too risky. Ya get a sense of it and then you look away.”
Dr. psychologist I could use some help! I’m having trouble with my yada yada yada!
@@charlenemack7040 You're having trouble with your sex life?
@@charlenemack7040 ...you have 3 breasts?
One of my favorites!
My favorite was Kramer coming into Jerry’s apartment, slapping his money down on the table, and exclaiming, “I’m out...!!!”
Yeah, but he slept like a baby that night!
Not the master of his domain!
@@brookt3497 I think he actually was. It was his domain.
@@AndrewOxenburgh :-)
How about this small bit at the end of The Contest episode.
Jerry: Oh my god in heaven
Elaine: Is that...
George: Kramer?!
There has never been another show quite like this. I will watch it until the day I die.
+Barclay Benjamin (Barcrrt) I've seen every episode dozens and dozens of times,and I still watch them today
bunny fish LOL!!! And I never get tired of them. I'm hooked!!!
Barclay Benjamin just watched 4 episodes today in fact
bunny fish I'll catch up with you tomorrow. On 4 times!!!
I think tbs runs them early on sat and sun,and mid day during the week.we have a local channel that runs 2 episodes during the eve national news times [m-f],so I get a good dose of all week long...my faves are the wedding in india,soup Nazi [of course]...the pen,kenny roger's chicken,and the BIG salad...and I really loved the show's ending,people were split on it,i thought it was wonderful to see everyone again in the court room
"You think it's more to Newman than meets the eye."
"No there's less"
“He’s a mystery wrapped in an Enigma”
“He’s a mystery wrapped in a twinkie”
“I have to admit Jerry, I’m a little hurt.”
“You’re not a little anything, Newman.”
Jerry: "You kept making all the stops??"
Kramer: "Well, people kept ringing the bell!"
That was an amazing episode!
One of the best things ever.
One of the funniest stories of all time 😅
"You're a cashier" is one of the best lines ever!
i like the jerk store called , and they ran out of you
yes, charles barkley used that lines to roast some guy on twitter in recent inside the nba episode. have you watch it? it's epic😃
I respect cashiers
TGGeko
Most don't.
A minimum wage, minimum skilled job. Not a career. A job. Usually performed by those who have failed in life, or have yet to enter it..students and such.
Jeff Johnson I think to some degree that's a little unfair, there aren't millions of $60,000 a year jobs out there for just anyone to have if they wish hard enough or even work hard enough. Some of these things are just unfortunate bad luck affairs. Not all but a lot.
love this bit...it is payback for Jerry dumping all his hot GF's for superficial minutiae reasons...pure genius writing.
I'm only going through the series and the feeling is that it's Jerry who's dumped or cannot go through the initial phase most of the time.
She's a cashier!
mostly they dump jerry but yeah.
Jerry: "How can I date someone who scoops up their corn niblets, but stabs peas?" Elaine: "Now you're finding fault on a subatomic level."
I think that Jerry wanted to break up with this girl, but when she initiated he had to try and put a stop to it. Classic.
“Well, the female body is a... a work of art. The male body is utilitarian, it’s for gettin’ around, it’s like a Jeep”
The male body is just a life support system for a penis and balls and for killing spiders.
Simp
Come talk to me about that art piece after 20 years of marriage and children.
😆😆😆
the female body is a work art, really most woman are overweight
@@felang9257 come over and have a look at my Russian wife after three kids. Her body used to be a work of art. Not anymore, pal.
“It’s not a lie if you believe it.” Is the best Seinfeld line btw.
I concur
No doubt the greatest line ever and if you look at politics today does it fit
SERENITY NOW!’
I was in the pool!!
One of my favourites is when they are all going to the Opera and both jarrey and George are very uncomfortable in their Tuxedos and then Kramer shows up not wearing anything formal and they say to him that I thought you said people dress up for this and Cramer says, people do , I don't.
"You're a cashier!" takes the cake for me.
Being a cahier is a respectful job in my mind. If you get paid for doing something it is worth respect
Squall Leonhart Just stop being weird and annoying okay loser?
i love you unlike your mom
she actually took that pretty well for being a snob
ObamaisnextLincoln - keep your nose out of it, boy
"what happened Tuesday night?"
"i saw your act"
BURN!
Good delivery on that too
THAT'S actually the best line in this skit.
Reminds me of the one where the gymnast breaks up with him: "You're no comedian"
She's so right though. His live act, to me at least really isn't funny at all. His show is hilarious but live act sucks.
She's super cute on the bloopers, too. She keeps laughing when Jerry says a certain line. He kept saying "I have other stuff, you should come see me on the weekend... people are falling out of their chairs, boom, gangbusters!" Something like that. Gangbusters kept cracking her up.
"He had the same look on his face as my father had when I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist" is my favourite line. Spoken by George of course.
George is the best
George IS Seinfeld!
George Costanza, an alalogue of Larry David..is the main focus of the show. Jerry is just his friend, and a framing device for George.
Kramer and Elaine are secondary characters.
It may be called Seinfeld, but it's really Costanza.
Look of disappointment. 😕
@@lueysixty-six7300 you mean ‘can’t stand ya’
Hands down, the funniest, well-written show of all time. i own the box set, seen every episode at least a dozen or so times, and still watch the reruns on tv. They never get old. Larry David = Genius
@RUFUS T. FIREFLY 1.Seinfeld; 2. Cheers; 3. WKRP in Cincinnati
@RUFUS T. FIREFLY You missed a lot of laughs.
@@johnbrowne2170 oh man three gems! Also Barney Miller, The Odd Couple and Frasier
Seinfeld was outstanding. Larry David's own show was pathetic.
RUFUS T. FIREFLY what does “JLD” stand for? I know LD but what’s the “J”? Don’t tell me “Jew” 🤦♂️
My favorite line: "And YOU want to be my latex salesman."
"But they do, and they're the ones writing it off."
"Was that wrong? Should I have not done that?"
Kramer and the mail fraud. Classic line. One of my favorites.
You don't even know what a write off is.
David St Hubbins “Do you?”
"Next thing I knew, she was wiping the floor with me!"😄
“You’re a cashier!” Memories.
I went out with a lady about 25 years back. We were on a date and it was kinda late, I said I needed to get home to bed as I had to get to work by 4:00 am, I worked on giant tires in the field usually 10-12 hours a day. Absolutely grueling work, all done by hand, tire bars and sledge hammers, hell even the gun to take some of the lugs off weighed over 100lbs and produced over 600 lb ft torque. It was tuff work but I kinda enjoyed that part of it as I didn’t have to work out to look like I did.
Anyway she said “ I don’t know why you need so much sleep, I can stay out all night and still work the next day”
I said the same damn thing. “YOURE A CASHIER”!!!
Bitch actually got offended and acted like there was some sorta comparison.
Typical western woman over valuing herself
Some people are just like that. Don't even have enough imagination to work out why you may or may not have a valid point.
Well that lady you had at her job if she fell asleep she would just get fired after a bunch of ppl steal from the store or restaurant but at your job you fall asleep you would've killed yourself or somebody else so your job is more dangerous than hers..
of course she was offended you fucking simpleton. just because you're a gas huffing redneck too stupid to get a proper job doesn't mean you have the right to act superior when someone, surprise surprise, doesn't break their back for peanuts like you do.
@@regalecusglesne3022 spoken like a man living in his daddy’s basement.
Such a great sitcom. This was Gold! Gold Jerry!
I've been working out. I'm huge.
@@TheBerndude "Soup's not a meal".
The best Jerry, the best!
@@ronfriedman8740 Can I use that? I'm gonna use that.
He ends with the word gold not Jerry
“I’m disturbed,. Im depressed. Im inadequate. I’ve got it all!” From George is probably my favorite
“If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right.”
“You’re a cashier!” ... it’s not just his implication and observation ... it’s also the tone that makes it hilarious
incredulous
Yup and now even more than then, all they have to do is know where the scan barcode is and it tells them how much change to give back. Easiest job on the planet. No matter where you work. And yeah maybe receptionist.
Snob
@@tropicalsnow she didn't respect what Jerry did. So shame on her.
@@tropicalsnow After she just disrespected his job? Moron.
Jerry trying damn hard to stay in character when she says, "It's just so much fluff" 🤣
George “You’re not in the mood, you get in mood”
Most beautiful cashier I've ever seen.
What's funny is that she says she lost interest on a prior night but that didn't stop her from wanting a free meal after. 😄
Great point. Yep most chicks will take a free meal no matter how they feel about the guy. Been there done that. Bitches.
"The sea was angry that day, my friends! Like an old man returning soup in a deli!" George Castanza... BEST LINE EVER!
"Jerry, sometimes I just don't know..."
Zach Haywood
A classic intro to a topic of disfavorable opinion.
I love when you can watch a show that just makes you laugh.
“You don’t need a wallet! Just stack your cards and have your fold around it. See, you keep the big bills on the outside.”
“That’s a five.”
I love this show. I especially love how Jerry was willing to have his career be the butt of so many jokes, when he was the most successful comedian in the country at the time.
What a sport
Jesse Baker Two solariums?
He should be known from now on as Jerry Two Solariums Seinfeld
I agree. I love how he's able to really poke fun at himself throughout the show!
@Carl Rice I'm confused by your comment. Like I really want to understand why you compared Carrot top to Jerry's comedy bringing his success.
I didn't even know who Carrot was.
I had to Google him.
And I'm not a Jerry fan, but I know who he is,
I guess my question is, even if Carrot wasn't suscefull, he did made his own career?
Larry David and the show brought success to Jerry, carrot top only got success by being with himself.
A one man show.
It's actually easier to make fun of yourself when you're clearly the most successful. The harder thing is to make fun of yourself when you're actually jokeable.
George to his mom, "you can't be out there. Because IM out there, and if I see you out there, there's not enough voltage in the world to electro-shock me back into coherence!"
“Is anybody here a marine biologist?”
my favourite episode, loved the way the writers wove all the strands of that story together.
The sea was angry that day, my friends.
@@racketman2u The show was highly scripted, actors had to say exactly what was wrote in the script. :))) Few know this.
“... not that there’s anything wrong with it...”
“He took. (coughs on glass twice). It out.”
He took what out? You know. It. He took it ...out? How could this be? Oh, it be. Anyone else you want to set me up with?
Kramer understood instantly
"IT?"
@@bretthess6376 "Out."
"As I rained blows upon him I realized there had to be a better way!"
One of my favorite lines: Elaine: “He took IT out”.
Yes!!!
Absolutely one of the best shows ever made,absolutely revolutionary, life-changing, The only fix I get now is watching curb your enthusiasm
'It's just so much fluff'.
He should have said: "I draw the line when you start trash talking my hair" :)
Circadin
What exactly is "fluff"😄 ? Haven't heard that expression before.
@@StephNuggs In this context "fluff" means his act didn't have enough substance.
Ginga
Ok thought as much. Thx
It's just so funny the way she says fluff!
These pretzels are making me thirsty...
?
@@vinayseth1114 That a line from the show, real funny scene, type it in and look for the video you wont regret it
No, no, no.. it’s “these PRETZELS are making me THIRSTY”
@@THEdjpluto Come on what type of acting is that its " THESE PRETZELS...are making me thirsty"
Your a video game ?
The best sit com of all time
"You're A Cashier" 🤣🤣😆😆😆😆😄😄😄😄😄😄😅😅😅😅😅
And the luckiest too! If Seinfeld tried to air it today, with all the sensitivity going on about everything and triggers abundance, it wouldn't be allowed.
I consider myself privileged for watching it in the making :)
Better line: "I saw your act"
@@yaronkl she was to dumb to understand the act.
"I have other stuff! You should come see me on the weekends" ...LMAO
Jerry... I don’t know sometimes
It’s “Jeeeeeerry”
Jerry couldn’t remember the woman’s name but he knew it sounded like a body part. She got mad and left the apartment and then he remembered and yelled out the window-Dolores!!😂
Clitoris and Delores do not rhyme........
mulva?? gipple??
Seinfeld for life. My favorite show ever
Frank Costanza to Elaine, "You want a piece of me?!"
"Jerry, have you ever taken a bath in the dark..call me back"
Charmaine what's this?
A quote from earlier in the episode ya uncultured swine
"Hey, its George........... yeah I got nothing"
Norm MacDonald had one of my favorite lines on his Norm Show. “I knew if I was unselfish I’d get something out of it”
Seinfeld is a collection of TV's greatest lines ever.
The better line, following "What happened Tuesday night?", is "I saw your act."
I love Seinfeld lol it’s so dry but it’s sooo good . It was even funnier when it was airing cuz we couldn’t binge it .
OH Shit! "YOU'RE A CASHIER!!!" LOL
My name is George, I’m unemployed and I live with my parents ‘. Lol
Seeing Jerry's act is like seeing Elaine dance.
"I have other stuff, you should come see me on the weekend"
:)
Gold Jerry Gold.
"These pretzels are making me thirsty!" huh, huh?
Nothing beats "worlds are colliding" ...for me... that was classic George
I'll get into a binge and watch Seinfeld for a month or two every night. And each time I ask myself "Could they do that today?" They'd have the show pulled off the air so fast!
Ever heard of curb?
he is hilarious live.went to one a few years ago, did stuff that was new and had me and my friend in tears laughing so hard. best comedy show I've ever been to
Jerry trying so hard not to laugh at things that upset his character is one of my favorite things about Seinfeld.
"I want to be the only man that doesn't die with dignity. I've lived my whole life in shame, why should I die with dignity"
The best lines from Seinfeld is by Frank Costanza: "This guy -- This is not my kind of guy" and "Jerry, it's Frank Costanza…George is dead. Call me back".
LOVE when people throw the punchline in the description. Absolutely love that.
Stefan Coetzee you seriously couldn't tell what line he meant....
Shepard Wallace it’s a 1.24 video. Why even read the description?
really makes the video worth watching.
"I HEARD the material."
“It shrinks??”
“Like a frightened turtle!”
"I was in the pool!"
Ive seen this hundreds of times and I still laugh
Whoa Whoa Whoa there Jerry, shes not *just* a cashier, shes an *essential* worker
She's the same actress George had "banter" with, when she played a waitress at the coffee shop. : )
Waitress, cashier, she's flexible. I do like her looks though...
She’s a cashier!!!! 😂
She's not gonna put 'em on the glass!
Whats actresses name?
George: The jerk store called and they're running out of you!. Cracking line! 🤣
“Moops it’s the moops”
One of the best scenes ever
"You're a cashier." Hilarious.
I like how Jerry even started breaking up after she said "it was just so much fluff" lol
Her face at the end was so great! Lol
Susan’s parents, after she died: “No parent should ever have to bury their child” GEORGE: “ Yes I hope my parents go long before I do”
“You’re a cashier”
Straight fluff..
🤣🤣
I totally relate to this scene. People love judging other people's occupations. I had a friend once who thought a guy was hot, but said he could never go out with him because he was a cook in diner. This friend was a desk clerk in a hotel. A desk clerk who thinks he's too good for a cook.
If that cook had a football linebacker type of body, then I gotta say, your desk clerk friend is an idiot.
@@fromthehaven94 The type of body isn't even relevant to my point. My friend was physically attracted to the cook, but dismissed him because of his occupation. Why judge someone who is working hard for a living? Perhaps the cook was paying his way through college or perhaps he was in-between jobs. My feeling has always been that I don't care what someone does for a living as long as they are working hard and supporting themselves or their family if they have one. I would be far more critical of someone who wasn't working for an extended period of time and sponging off the taxpayer.
It sounds like your friend is projecting because he doesn't think his own job is very good and looking down on a cook makes him feel superior
Couple fancy boys anyway. Who cares??
She disrespected Jerry's profession but nobody's talking about it?
I always enjoyed the fact that every episode is relatable to every day life. Even them in the show making fun of how Jerry can’t act but then in real life they said it too. He was talking about he is can’t act. Amazing show.
"Up here, I'm already gone." - Cosmo Kramer
My favorite line:
“I’m sorry George I know this can’t be easy for you.”
“You know, it really can’t!”
“i’ve been duped! I thought I was getting advice from a real Chinese person.”
"I've got good news and bad news ...and they're both the same ... you're fired!" ~Frank Costanza
I like the scene where the woman breaks up with Jerry and he's like "that's okay, ill find someone else."
The sea was angry that day my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli
Jerry: That’s one hell of a loogie!
My favorite scene is Jerry explaining the trajectory of a loogie hitting Kramer and Newman at the baseball game. Such metaphorical analysis to JFK assassination. That scene of the loogie shooting even had the famous “mysterious man with the umbrella” in the background.
Classic!!!
Rewatched that one this evening... and couldn't stop laughing over all the details by Jerry and the vintage film sequence.
thing is: there are comedies, that are funny once or twice you see them. But the real well done ones trigger the LMAO-factor while rewatching, long before the punch line/final gag comes up.
@@martinb.770 Exactly! I watched the scene over and over and still have my LMAO factor! I love it. The details and analysis of the loogie shot! Such an ionic scene exactly like infamous JFK assassination scene. Especially that umbrella man ...
I love how she doesn't have a comeback for, "You're a cashier!" and just doubles down.
One of my favorites : why did you say that im marine biologist. You know i always wanted to PRETEND like iam an architect
Jerry always trying not to laugh just adds to the humor!
This woman represents about 95% of women on tinder and POF.
Or real life...
lol...that is funny, I am now old and married with two grown children and though I am decently good looking and have always been a pretty good athlete so had a physique girls liked in my younger days, once I got out of Engineering College and started making the "big" bucks, I definitely noticed the class of girl I could talk into a date went way up...as I used to joke, I guess I got a lot taller when I stood on my wallet.
@@stevefowler2112 you're wife must be hot
Lol she's basically the female version of Jerry by breaking up with someone over dumb things lol
@@jak4934 Hadn't thought of that, lol, but you are spot on...
Best line.
Sir, I know why we have reservations.
No, I don't think you do.
"It's Not A Lie If You Believe It."
The best line ever is when Elaine talks about faking orgasms - "Fake! Fake! Fake! Fake! Fake!
This line is good but my person favorite is Kramer's "Look at it! look at it!" As he shows Jerry his chest hair.
The best combination of one liners is definitely the library cop interrogation.
Kramer wasn't showing Jerry his CHEST hair.
...So, ya think you’re funny, Joy boy??? Laugh it up!!! 📚 📖 📚
I saw your act
The delivery was perfect
The best line ever is when Jerry puts the phone down on that phone salesman.
You can tell he wanted to burst out laughing and was trying to hold back lol 😂
Definitely. Looked like she was holding it back too 🤣
“It’s just so much fluff”
😂
New York actress tries southern accent. Sounds like Blanche from Streetcar Named Desire after a lobotomy.
Well it's sitcom.
She uses this exact same accent in an episode of Quantum Leap, clearly this is considered to be in her "skill-set", honestly there is something that sounds 'off' but I don't think it's THAT bad
@@JMTavares7 Tracy first appeared on TV being interviewed on McNeil-Lehrer in 1978 as a 16 y-o attending Performing Arts High School in NYC, talking about being a teenage cigarette smoker. I saw it at the time and always remembered her because of the way she came across on camera even then.
So what? It added to the humor. After all, this is a comedy.
"Tuesday night? What happened Tuesday night?"
"I saw Your Act!"