I was single for 4 years because I was taking care of my mental health and started learning how to handle my shit. In someone else I'd consider that a plus and not a red flag. :))
Someone who is trying to find all your red flags and wants to focus on your shortcomings is also a red flag. If being single for a long time because you choose to work on yourself and heal your traumas so that you can be a better human being and become your greatest healthiest version is a red flag, the woman who thinks that it's a problem is a major red flag. Ladies, I'm here to tell you, if you've been single for a long time for healthy reasons, you are not a red flag. Women who pressure you to put a label on your relationship after a week is another major red flag.
Agree. Was single for most of my life working through trauma because I would not have been mentally healthy enough for a good partnership. Its also super easy to find dates so most of the time singleness is a choice.
When two compatible lesbian RUclips partners live together for a decade and share a cat but will not make their relationship official… red flag. ;) I kid. Much love to you both
I don't think it's necessarily a red flag. There are so many valid explanations, don't let it get to you. I don't think that being in a relationship is the only goal to have in life. And for me, someone who has to be in one and can't live their life alone is the actual red flag. I don't think they meant for it to make you feel insecure.
Hey I didn't meet my current gf until i was almost 31. Hadnt had a real relationship before her. Spent a lot of years working on mental health and working through trauma. Think it's also typical for lesbians that realize later in life. Way better to be single than stuck in bad relationships or jump from relationship to relationship without healing or truly moving on from the last one
hating on single people!? come on…. it‘s a good sign, because they a) don‘t fall to the constant pressure of having to be in a relationship (and consequently being together with people that are not good for them) and b) they took the time to get their life, mental health and other shit together!! or c) they are were just not in a place to be committed, knew it and consequently didn‘t bullshit anyone and just lived an honest life.
Right?! I would think being single for convenient reasons, or remaining single while making life improvements is a plus. Verses someone who is constantly in new relationships.
I'm 26 and been single for 4 years, but 3 of those are because of the pandemic so I think it naturally cancels it out. I'm officially saying 1 year until after everything opens back up and it's safe to get into a relationship 😅
I'm 27 and I've never been in a relationship. I find certain guys attractive but I never have any feelings for them beyond that (I'm a straight, Asexual person). The only time I ever had (non-sexual) feelings for a guy that were different from anything I'd ever felt before/have felt since was when I was little and had a crush on Thumper from the movie Bambi. I'm not joking - I truly thought Thumper was "different" in a way I just could not describe.
I think no friends or not being in a relationship for too long being red flags is quite a blanket assumption. I think that's why many introverts ends up alone.
Not my late bloomer, 33 year old lesbian ass never being in a relationship 😐 I was extremely picky about men (obviously, lmao). And I never wanted to form a relationship with a man. And when I finally came out to myself, boom, fucking Covid.
Hey! I met my gf during covid right before i turned 31! Was never in a real relationship before. We are in the same boat. Spent a lot of time working through trauma and making sure I was a good partner. Feel like its not truly a red flag to be single if you realized after your early 20s or you were really focused on improving yourself. Think the real red flag is commitment issues. Plenty of lesbian/bi women have been single for a while and dont consider it a deal breaker, absolutely promise you that.
Only one I have is the relationship one which is kind of flawed in its phrasing. I'm 27, spent my entire adult life actively not wanting/avoiding relationships, but I also only came out last year, a full year into the pandemic. Also not living in a safe space to openly date. It really is conditional because people come out at so many different stages of their lives.
if they're significantly older (30s+) going after ONLY younger girls (aka early 20s and late teens) like leo dicaprio and try to disguise that by being a "mentor" in the community. ive encountered this type A LOT. they are extremely controlling predatory and weird.
I just went on a red flag powerpoint date w/ a girl (known her for quite a bit). Things were going well until… All of her slides were about her ex-boyfriend, mine were about how I still shop in the kids section and not being able to physically whisper. We are not the same.
My ex, one month after we started dating, said she wanted kids before 35. Ok. But she wanted to have the baby solo (?).. i mean.. the kid would be HERS only, no matter if she was dating someone or single, she said. That was a whole stadium of red flags
When they keep talking about their ex is a red flag for me. Omg the ones that never ask you questions about yourself when you’re chatting on the dating app. Only answers questions never asks them. 😂
if they don't like you then that's their problem and I wouldn't let it get you down. There are people out there that will like and love you. So keep your head up my dear.
Me not being in a relationship for a long time (although I'm under 25) and the woman I'm currently talking to having all straight friends. I think most of the red flags in this video aren't deal breakers tho.
Being single for a long time to work on mental health or focus on school/self improvement isn't really a red flag to me. Jumping from a serious relationship to another relationship is tho.
don't make them a tattoo in your mind. these are not serious red flags. some of them made me wonder wtf am I watching, a comedic or a real approach to this topic
Red flag.. still financially entangled with ex! Cooking...I cooked for my new girlfriend for a week..she asked me to stop! Lol! Turned out she was a natural chef! We're going on 20:years of owning a diner!
I was 1 month out of a relationship with my ex when I started seeing my current girlfriend. I was very much not over my ex but my girlfriend stuck around until I was because she said she knew I was the one. We have now been together for 7 years and are engaged. Being with my fiancé made me realize how many red flags my ex had and how toxic the relationship was even though, I originally had “first lesbian relationship” blinders on.
I'm actually seeing a woman where we've been dating 4 months, but she had just broken up with her very toxic ex maybe a few weeks before she met me. She still doesn't know if she's ready for a committed relationship, but says she loves me and that she wants to be better for me. Long story short, about how long did your fiancé wait before you decided you were ready to commit to her? I hear time and time again that waiting for someone is a waste of time, but I really like the person I've been dating and seeing your story gives me hope that maybe she and I do have a future together 💖
Yeah, the one where they don't ask you anything about your life is the one thing I look for when online dating. The minute I notice I'm asking her about her life more than she is about mine, I ghost! Some other red flags I look for are; If she asks for money too soon in the relationship or even when we aren't officially in a relationship. She gets angry really quickly for the littlest things and then makes you feel bad, manipulates the situation to make you apologize. Always wants sympathy (exhausting). Which is why I don't think being single for more than a year is a red flag. Taking your time and getting to know a person to see if you can even be friends before jumping into a commitment is so important. I"ve made it a rule now, not to make anything official for 6 months. If they don't stick around until then, then at least you didn't waste your time and money.
7 months ago a new flatmate moved in. I was friendly and welcoming, one morning she brought me out of my room to tell me she didn't want to be friends, when i said that's sad, she shouted 'well it's not what i'm looking for'. To this day i still don't know how to talk to this person.
Yeah...no. Those are mostly personal preferences. I personally don't like people who have a lot of friends because I'm afraid they won't want to spend as much time with me compared to their friends, or they might invite me to many things that I just don't want to attend because I'm introverted and mostly a home body. But that doesn't make it a red flag. It's not necessarily a bad thing. Where I might be uncomfortable with it, someone else might love it. And someone who hasn't been in a relationship in a long time just tells me that they don't throw themselves into situations with the first person who comes along. Or that they don't go out much and has a hard time meeting people which I personally can relate to and would find very attractive actually. I don't like people who are incredibly social.
I met my gf only a month after I broke up with my ex of almost 3 years. But even though I was newly single I already did feel ready to date again, because I had emotionally removed myself from the previous relationship several months before the actual breakup. Sounds awful but trust me, my ex was on the same boat as me, there was no romantic love there, she treated me very poorly (to the point that even her family and friends noticed) and we were both just used to routine and being in each other’s presence. I didn’t really need to get over her tbh. But I do agree that in most cases it’s very risky to date someone that broke up their previous relationship less than 6 months ago
I'm 25 and my last relationship ended shortly after I turned 22. I've been in university full-time and have chosen to be single for the remainder of my university career because it wouldn't be fair to the woman I date, as I would be unable to give her my full attention. Plus, I had some emotional growing to do; I've been in therapy once a week to try and hammer out some of my own toxic behavior and trauma. As such, I feel I've gotta partially disagree with the "being single for 3+ years is a red flag" statement. I think it depends on the situation. I am waiting until I am in a stable place in my life and can be a good partner. I will freely admit that I'm not the person I want to be yet, but I'm a lot closer than I was after my last breakup :)
I guess I have a huge red flag then, but I think the reason I haven’t been in a relationship 6 years is reasonable… What do you think internet lesbians? I realized that I tended to settle down in relationships quickly with people because they were into me and I was like wow they like me, but I rarely took the time to take a breath and ask myself how I really felt about them. My last relationship ended in 2016, I dated a bit after but I realized I was allowed to take time to figure myself out and to refuse to settle with someone who doesn’t treat me well (been in toxic relationships yup…). In 2017, I went back to school for a career change and I graduated in 2020 and I am finally settling into what I want my professional life and life accomplishments to be. I was a 30 year old going back to school, having to work part time to pay rent and make ends meet. I didn’t have time to think about dating that much I guess because I was in a pivotal point of my life being changed. And a pandemic happened also so… Is me being single since 2016 still a red flag after this context?
Sapphic community will make up “red flags” like never having been in a relationship (despite the well known fact that our community is filled with late bloomers) and “having too many friends”. …and yet will continually be uhauling into relationships instead of getting to know each other over time.
My red flag is talking too much about myself--but it only happens when there's too much silence or I'm still really nervous around you. It's totally an anxious rambling thing for me. The second I'm comfy enough to relax a bit and actually behave normally (as my true self), that rambling will ironically turn into a huge pool of questions about you LOL. My rambling redirects from anxious to just pure ADHD fixating on getting to know you.
Haven't been in a relationship for 3+ years? I don't agree. My partner of 6 years is my first relationship. There are many reasons why people don't date seriously.
Yeah, I have a huge red flag and one of the many reasons I don’t date at all. My ex and I are still legally married and best friends (without benefits, except health insurance, lol). It’s been 9 years. It’s very much an it’s complicated scenario. 🚨
I know this is a me thing and not a them thing ... But can't be with someone who has terrible table manners ... I mean noisy eating/drinking really 🙈 but they'll have red flagged me first I'm sure 😀
Although Red Flags can be a helpful guide, if you came from a traumatic background your “sensors” might not always be accurate. You might ignore your inner wisdom and make choices that create chaos and drama in your life. Or if your intuition is pretty strong, you still might exert a lot of energy being hyper vigilant. I didn’t even find a healthy relationship until I was 35 (we’ve been together now for over 11 years). Focus on taking care of yourself and learning to become an authentic person. When you learn how to be authentic, it’s easier to be accountable to yourself and others. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes, just correct your course and be gentle with yourself.
When you have to start all the conversations is a red flag I’ve found but then again it might just be me wanting to talk to them too much idk😂 considering my last 2 gfs left me bc they found someone they wanted to date more than me is prob my red flag so don’t take advice from me cause obviously there’s something wrong with me lol
You made me realize my red flag may not apply in this modern age, someone has a bunch of photos of themselves in their house.( Not family or group shots) in this social media/ selfish age I guess it's not as big a red flag as it used to be
Me personally all of those red flags could be explained. I myself prefer to see actions as the red flags not past events or what they have or don't have. Actions always speak louder than words. My main flags are that they promise something then don't commit without proper reasoning. They act differently around you, than they do others. They talk behind peoples backs negatively to make them seem bad. (not including venting ,people need to vent at some point about someone or something ).They ignore you when you do something they don't like. They dismay your feelings and put their own or others before yours. They Lie to you. They make you feel alone in a group full of friends. My experiences with some people have red flags but for other reasons. such as anxiety, depression ,ptsd ect Not all red flags tell everything about a person tho.
Lol, luckily you have a young audience, cause I'm 46 and have never been in a (long) relationship, so talk about a red flag. I'll never have a relationship in my life 😂😂😂😂😂😂😬
Reason for being single is the red flag. If you didnt realize you were gay until "later" in life or working on mental health, those are completely understandable for most people.
@@Bobsbugur8140 both not the case. What if you don't have a clear reason for being single for a long time?! I think it's funny that this is something people read into a lot. Like not living up to societies expectations of pairing up actually says something about someone's personality. I'm glad I'm secure enough to not worry about this, but I guess younger people will.
@@moordt well tbh there are plenty of reasons to want to be single for a while! Figure yourself out, get stable in a career, focus on education, and so many more. Even just not feeling like you want to date is a fine reason.
This video was so stupid lol There is nothing wrong with being single for however long for whatever reason. You shouldn't be forced to have relationships because that's what society expects of you.
I'm sorry to say that, but if you think that having a lot of friends is a red flag, you're a red flag. I have a lot of friends and I think this is a sign that I can built relationships with few poeople and take care of every single human in my life even if I don't have a lot of time. It's ok if you don't have any friends and it's ok if you have ten important people in your life. Your worth does not depend on the number of people you hang out with. And also this red flag with all straight friends. Really? Really you want to discriminate people because of their sexual orientation? I thought we don't like it in LGBT+ community. I'm 22 years old and I have never been in any romantic relationship, because I was focused on my studies and job. I had to leave my family, because of the violence in my home. I'm not gonna watch any of your episodes anymore. I think you should say sorry to your fans. It's so harmful say things like that.
But I think it was only meant as a joke, too many/too few/too straight friends are all red flags, and not having a red flag is a red flag. No one will get out without at least one red flag.
I love you guys but a couple of the "red flags" you mentioned were just you guys being overly judgemental. Take what you said about people who have gone a long time without being in a relationship, for example. I've never been in a relationship - should I come with a warning label?
girls seriously some of your ideas are just disappointing. I mean...independence is a red flag?? I feel so sorry for you believing that. plus, have you ever heard of "introverts"?? Well, they exist, too! and the most disappointing thing: 5:08... seriously?!! I felt like I was listening to 15 years old girl and not a mature woman in a serious relationship. this video, was a waste of time.
Cat red flag wont introduce you to their cat funny😼 I think it depends with not dating someone for a while cuz they're medically sick like they have a bone marrow condition and I can't date I've had megablast anemia for five years I think that's an okay reason not to date cuz I really don't have the energy go out and meet people and trying to recover I think if someone is working on them self mentally emotionally to get over issues and they don't date for awhile I think that's a healthy thing if I do recover from the bone anemia I am definitely going to go on a date I still talk to my friends on the phone a little bit and my mom so I'm still socialized if you order takeout cuz of coronavirus I think that's okay I definitely think it's a red flag of someone doesn't date for certain reasons but not all the reasons
Old wave feminists paved the way for you to have a much better life so have some respect! You need to educate yourself and lose the shitty flippant attitude.
I was single for 4 years because I was taking care of my mental health and started learning how to handle my shit. In someone else I'd consider that a plus and not a red flag. :))
Definitely! Being self aware and making the time & effort to work on yourself first is a plus for sure. Good for you!
Agree
Literally just thinking this exact thought. Ummhhh...what about mental health?
yeah babe. Take care of yourself!
Someone who is trying to find all your red flags and wants to focus on your shortcomings is also a red flag. If being single for a long time because you choose to work on yourself and heal your traumas so that you can be a better human being and become your greatest healthiest version is a red flag, the woman who thinks that it's a problem is a major red flag. Ladies, I'm here to tell you, if you've been single for a long time for healthy reasons, you are not a red flag. Women who pressure you to put a label on your relationship after a week is another major red flag.
No one is perfect...everyone has a red flag or 2. Doesn't make them a bad partner
Agree. Was single for most of my life working through trauma because I would not have been mentally healthy enough for a good partnership. Its also super easy to find dates so most of the time singleness is a choice.
@@Bobsbugur8140 quality over quantity my friend!
Ive been doing some internal searching as well
@@Bobsbugur8140 You might find it super easy to find dates, but some of us don’t
When two compatible lesbian RUclips partners live together for a decade and share a cat but will not make their relationship official… red flag.
;) I kid. Much love to you both
👋👋👋
hahah
Oh boy do I have some news for you 😂
@@thesunnyone_ I didn’t know what your comment meant until I went on Instagram and O M G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💥
@@Livmylifelivi I know, hey!! Best news of 2022 😱
As a 30 year old who has never been in a relationship, that red flag hit close to home
It's a damn catch 22. You can't get the job w no experience and you can't get experience w out having a job.
@@laurensternhagen8826 You took the words right out of my mouth
I don't think it's necessarily a red flag. There are so many valid explanations, don't let it get to you.
I don't think that being in a relationship is the only goal to have in life. And for me, someone who has to be in one and can't live their life alone is the actual red flag.
I don't think they meant for it to make you feel insecure.
Hey I didn't meet my current gf until i was almost 31. Hadnt had a real relationship before her. Spent a lot of years working on mental health and working through trauma. Think it's also typical for lesbians that realize later in life. Way better to be single than stuck in bad relationships or jump from relationship to relationship without healing or truly moving on from the last one
SAME 😭😭😭 that one HURT ngl
hating on single people!? come on…. it‘s a good sign, because they a) don‘t fall to the constant pressure of having to be in a relationship (and consequently being together with people that are not good for them) and b) they took the time to get their life, mental health and other shit together!! or c) they are were just not in a place to be committed, knew it and consequently didn‘t bullshit anyone and just lived an honest life.
Right?! I would think being single for convenient reasons, or remaining single while making life improvements is a plus. Verses someone who is constantly in new relationships.
I'm 26 and been single for 4 years, but 3 of those are because of the pandemic so I think it naturally cancels it out. I'm officially saying 1 year until after everything opens back up and it's safe to get into a relationship 😅
yeah, the pandemic made meeting people even more difficult. I feel you on that.
The pandemic has only been 2 years though...
I'm 27 and I've never been in a relationship. I find certain guys attractive but I never have any feelings for them beyond that (I'm a straight, Asexual person). The only time I ever had (non-sexual) feelings for a guy that were different from anything I'd ever felt before/have felt since was when I was little and had a crush on Thumper from the movie Bambi. I'm not joking - I truly thought Thumper was "different" in a way I just could not describe.
I think no friends or not being in a relationship for too long being red flags is quite a blanket assumption. I think that's why many introverts ends up alone.
Not my late bloomer, 33 year old lesbian ass never being in a relationship 😐 I was extremely picky about men (obviously, lmao). And I never wanted to form a relationship with a man.
And when I finally came out to myself, boom, fucking Covid.
Hey! I met my gf during covid right before i turned 31! Was never in a real relationship before. We are in the same boat. Spent a lot of time working through trauma and making sure I was a good partner. Feel like its not truly a red flag to be single if you realized after your early 20s or you were really focused on improving yourself. Think the real red flag is commitment issues. Plenty of lesbian/bi women have been single for a while and dont consider it a deal breaker, absolutely promise you that.
Bring back Cooking with Lesbians!!!
Only one I have is the relationship one which is kind of flawed in its phrasing. I'm 27, spent my entire adult life actively not wanting/avoiding relationships, but I also only came out last year, a full year into the pandemic. Also not living in a safe space to openly date. It really is conditional because people come out at so many different stages of their lives.
if they're significantly older (30s+) going after ONLY younger girls (aka early 20s and late teens) like leo dicaprio and try to disguise that by being a "mentor" in the community. ive encountered this type A LOT. they are extremely controlling predatory and weird.
I feel personally attacked because I have so many red flags according to this video.
Not to worry, one person's red flags are another person's "me too!"
me too!
I just went on a red flag powerpoint date w/ a girl (known her for quite a bit). Things were going well until… All of her slides were about her ex-boyfriend, mine were about how I still shop in the kids section and not being able to physically whisper. We are not the same.
I meeaannn … hey 😊 forget her then :)
Known someone for a month she never talks about her friends and only seeing her once a week!!
My ex, one month after we started dating, said she wanted kids before 35. Ok. But she wanted to have the baby solo (?).. i mean.. the kid would be HERS only, no matter if she was dating someone or single, she said. That was a whole stadium of red flags
I am here for the Sadie cameos
When they keep talking about their ex is a red flag for me.
Omg the ones that never ask you questions about yourself when you’re chatting on the dating app. Only answers questions never asks them. 😂
26 years old and living my single 7 years plus life. Feeling attacked 🤣
I’m 23 and I’ve never been in a relationship :( I haven’t met many queer women, and the ones I like don’t like me :(
if they don't like you then that's their problem and I wouldn't let it get you down. There are people out there that will like and love you. So keep your head up my dear.
Me not being in a relationship for a long time (although I'm under 25) and the woman I'm currently talking to having all straight friends. I think most of the red flags in this video aren't deal breakers tho.
Same
Being single for a long time to work on mental health or focus on school/self improvement isn't really a red flag to me. Jumping from a serious relationship to another relationship is tho.
don't make them a tattoo in your mind. these are not serious red flags. some of them made me wonder wtf am I watching, a comedic or a real approach to this topic
Red flag.. still financially entangled with ex! Cooking...I cooked for my new girlfriend for a week..she asked me to stop! Lol! Turned out she was a natural chef! We're going on 20:years of owning a diner!
I was 1 month out of a relationship with my ex when I started seeing my current girlfriend. I was very much not over my ex but my girlfriend stuck around until I was because she said she knew I was the one. We have now been together for 7 years and are engaged. Being with my fiancé made me realize how many red flags my ex had and how toxic the relationship was even though, I originally had “first lesbian relationship” blinders on.
I'm actually seeing a woman where we've been dating 4 months, but she had just broken up with her very toxic ex maybe a few weeks before she met me. She still doesn't know if she's ready for a committed relationship, but says she loves me and that she wants to be better for me.
Long story short, about how long did your fiancé wait before you decided you were ready to commit to her? I hear time and time again that waiting for someone is a waste of time, but I really like the person I've been dating and seeing your story gives me hope that maybe she and I do have a future together 💖
Being too jealous is a huge red flag for me 😜
Yeah, the one where they don't ask you anything about your life is the one thing I look for when online dating. The minute I notice I'm asking her about her life more than she is about mine, I ghost!
Some other red flags I look for are;
If she asks for money too soon in the relationship or even when we aren't officially in a relationship.
She gets angry really quickly for the littlest things and then makes you feel bad, manipulates the situation to make you apologize.
Always wants sympathy (exhausting).
Which is why I don't think being single for more than a year is a red flag. Taking your time and getting to know a person to see if you can even be friends before jumping into a commitment is so important. I"ve made it a rule now, not to make anything official for 6 months. If they don't stick around until then, then at least you didn't waste your time and money.
The major red flag for me is not being able to comunicate
I have not been in a relationship in 18 years. Andthe last one was my first.
Drink everytime they say red flag. Good luck 😂
But I only have those three 4-locos in my fridge!
7 months ago a new flatmate moved in. I was friendly and welcoming, one morning she brought me out of my room to tell me she didn't want to be friends, when i said that's sad, she shouted 'well it's not what i'm looking for'. To this day i still don't know how to talk to this person.
After experiencing loss and pain for over 2 years now, coming to me with anti-vax conspiracy theories, you get a XXL-size red flag.
I second this
Yeah...no. Those are mostly personal preferences. I personally don't like people who have a lot of friends because I'm afraid they won't want to spend as much time with me compared to their friends, or they might invite me to many things that I just don't want to attend because I'm introverted and mostly a home body. But that doesn't make it a red flag. It's not necessarily a bad thing. Where I might be uncomfortable with it, someone else might love it. And someone who hasn't been in a relationship in a long time just tells me that they don't throw themselves into situations with the first person who comes along. Or that they don't go out much and has a hard time meeting people which I personally can relate to and would find very attractive actually. I don't like people who are incredibly social.
I met my gf only a month after I broke up with my ex of almost 3 years. But even though I was newly single I already did feel ready to date again, because I had emotionally removed myself from the previous relationship several months before the actual breakup. Sounds awful but trust me, my ex was on the same boat as me, there was no romantic love there, she treated me very poorly (to the point that even her family and friends noticed) and we were both just used to routine and being in each other’s presence. I didn’t really need to get over her tbh.
But I do agree that in most cases it’s very risky to date someone that broke up their previous relationship less than 6 months ago
i would settle down for anyone who has beer and nothing else in their fridge
I see you fine ladies took my previous comment to heart. Congratulations and much love to you BOTH!!
When we wear rose-tinted glasses, sometimes red flags just look like flags.
Oh no. I've been single for almost 3 yrs, and I'm about to move to a new city so I won't have friends.
Relationships these days is a joke 🤣 I'm proud to be a red flag 😘
😂👍🏻
I'm 25 and my last relationship ended shortly after I turned 22. I've been in university full-time and have chosen to be single for the remainder of my university career because it wouldn't be fair to the woman I date, as I would be unable to give her my full attention. Plus, I had some emotional growing to do; I've been in therapy once a week to try and hammer out some of my own toxic behavior and trauma. As such, I feel I've gotta partially disagree with the "being single for 3+ years is a red flag" statement. I think it depends on the situation. I am waiting until I am in a stable place in my life and can be a good partner. I will freely admit that I'm not the person I want to be yet, but I'm a lot closer than I was after my last breakup :)
Major red flag: if all her ex's are "crazy"
The contemporary term for that is narcissist. Everyone's ex was a narcissist.
Omg pillow talk I missed you!!! 💚💜💐
Certain people are better alone
I guess I have a huge red flag then, but I think the reason I haven’t been in a relationship 6 years is reasonable… What do you think internet lesbians? I realized that I tended to settle down in relationships quickly with people because they were into me and I was like wow they like me, but I rarely took the time to take a breath and ask myself how I really felt about them. My last relationship ended in 2016, I dated a bit after but I realized I was allowed to take time to figure myself out and to refuse to settle with someone who doesn’t treat me well (been in toxic relationships yup…). In 2017, I went back to school for a career change and I graduated in 2020 and I am finally settling into what I want my professional life and life accomplishments to be. I was a 30 year old going back to school, having to work part time to pay rent and make ends meet. I didn’t have time to think about dating that much I guess because I was in a pivotal point of my life being changed. And a pandemic happened also so… Is me being single since 2016 still a red flag after this context?
Sapphic community will make up “red flags” like never having been in a relationship (despite the well known fact that our community is filled with late bloomers) and “having too many friends”.
…and yet will continually be uhauling into relationships instead of getting to know each other over time.
My red flag is talking too much about myself--but it only happens when there's too much silence or I'm still really nervous around you. It's totally an anxious rambling thing for me. The second I'm comfy enough to relax a bit and actually behave normally (as my true self), that rambling will ironically turn into a huge pool of questions about you LOL. My rambling redirects from anxious to just pure ADHD fixating on getting to know you.
2 plus years single. I'm 28. I don't have gay friends. I don't have friends. I am a walking red flag.
The way you say 'Flag' 🤣 that accent 👍🏼
Red flags is never recognized by a person if they are lusting
Love your cat 🐈Mines looks exactly like yours.
I agree with some of these, but not all of them.
I'm 31 and I haven't been in a proper relationship since I was 25 so I guess I'm a red flag 😅
Of course mine is the classic not over my ex red flag. I have also been told I am "too friendly" so there's that ha...
What if all her friends, are online gamer friends?
Asking for a friend? ☺😉
@@ohthelovelypoems haha 😄 no! Was blindsided with a breakup recently and these red flags caught just enough curiosity from me
I love you guys so muchhh
Haven't been in a relationship for 3+ years? I don't agree. My partner of 6 years is my first relationship. There are many reasons why people don't date seriously.
I don’t care about any red flag, just come directly girls!
The set of all red flags includes not having red flags haha
Yeah, I have a huge red flag and one of the many reasons I don’t date at all. My ex and I are still legally married and best friends (without benefits, except health insurance, lol). It’s been 9 years. It’s very much an it’s complicated scenario. 🚨
Making a video about red flags … huge red flag. ;-)
😅😆😅😆
well. my fridge is full of half-spoiled take-outs. Must be a flag red as blood ))))
I think a lot of you are taking this way too seriously
i broke up the October before the pandemic and have been single ever since. red flag? this is a weird time
So grateful for these two 🥰
I'm a living red flag, 😱... LoL
I know this is a me thing and not a them thing ... But can't be with someone who has terrible table manners ... I mean noisy eating/drinking really 🙈 but they'll have red flagged me first I'm sure 😀
i don't need someone to cook or clean for me...i need someone i can equate with.
Although Red Flags can be a helpful guide, if you came from a traumatic background your “sensors” might not always be accurate. You might ignore your inner wisdom and make choices that create chaos and drama in your life. Or if your intuition is pretty strong, you still might exert a lot of energy being hyper vigilant. I didn’t even find a healthy relationship until I was 35 (we’ve been together now for over 11 years). Focus on taking care of yourself and learning to become an authentic person. When you learn how to be authentic, it’s easier to be accountable to yourself and others. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes, just correct your course and be gentle with yourself.
When you have to start all the conversations is a red flag I’ve found but then again it might just be me wanting to talk to them too much idk😂
considering my last 2 gfs left me bc they found someone they wanted to date more than me is prob my red flag so don’t take advice from me cause obviously there’s something wrong with me lol
You made me realize my red flag may not apply in this modern age, someone has a bunch of photos of themselves in their house.( Not family or group shots) in this social media/ selfish age I guess it's not as big a red flag as it used to be
If they put overly long ads about shitty food services in their videos 🚩 🚩 🚩
The not being in a relation ship is like really rude like some people didn’t know that’s they’re gay up until they’re 20ies ??
I don't really agree with those ... are not such deal-breakers to me tbh
These were bang on!
Did anybody count how many times they said "red flag" in this video?
Damn I came out right before the pandemic, zero daring 😭…am i a red flag ?!?!
Me personally all of those red flags could be explained. I myself prefer to see actions as the red flags not past events or what they have or don't have. Actions always speak louder than words. My main flags are that they promise something then don't commit without proper reasoning. They act differently around you, than they do others. They talk behind peoples backs negatively to make them seem bad. (not including venting ,people need to vent at some point about someone or something ).They ignore you when you do something they don't like. They dismay your feelings and put their own or others before yours. They Lie to you. They make you feel alone in a group full of friends. My experiences with some people have red flags but for other reasons. such as anxiety, depression ,ptsd ect Not all red flags tell everything about a person tho.
Well... I'm a red flag 🚩😂
Conclusion: I am a big red flag.
Lol, luckily you have a young audience, cause I'm 46 and have never been in a (long) relationship, so talk about a red flag. I'll never have a relationship in my life 😂😂😂😂😂😂😬
Reason for being single is the red flag. If you didnt realize you were gay until "later" in life or working on mental health, those are completely understandable for most people.
@@Bobsbugur8140 both not the case. What if you don't have a clear reason for being single for a long time?! I think it's funny that this is something people read into a lot. Like not living up to societies expectations of pairing up actually says something about someone's personality. I'm glad I'm secure enough to not worry about this, but I guess younger people will.
@@moordt well tbh there are plenty of reasons to want to be single for a while! Figure yourself out, get stable in a career, focus on education, and so many more. Even just not feeling like you want to date is a fine reason.
I love Sadie episodes
This video was so stupid lol There is nothing wrong with being single for however long for whatever reason. You shouldn't be forced to have relationships because that's what society expects of you.
I'm sorry to say that, but if you think that having a lot of friends is a red flag, you're a red flag. I have a lot of friends and I think this is a sign that I can built relationships with few poeople and take care of every single human in my life even if I don't have a lot of time. It's ok if you don't have any friends and it's ok if you have ten important people in your life. Your worth does not depend on the number of people you hang out with.
And also this red flag with all straight friends. Really? Really you want to discriminate people because of their sexual orientation? I thought we don't like it in LGBT+ community.
I'm 22 years old and I have never been in any romantic relationship, because I was focused on my studies and job. I had to leave my family, because of the violence in my home.
I'm not gonna watch any of your episodes anymore. I think you should say sorry to your fans. It's so harmful say things like that.
Yeah, "wants to date you for your friends" should be a red flag...
But I think it was only meant as a joke, too many/too few/too straight friends are all red flags, and not having a red flag is a red flag. No one will get out without at least one red flag.
i miss your cooking videos
God damn it my red flags are that my friends are straight 😭 not my fault I met them in school and never meet new people
Aww same here! I love them though, wouldn't have it any other way
Hmmm. At least I can boil water 🤷🏼♀️
But when you're wearing rose tinted glasses all red flags look normal
who still drinks four locos???
I am a red flag. Everything about me sucks. 🙃
I love you guys but a couple of the "red flags" you mentioned were just you guys being overly judgemental. Take what you said about people who have gone a long time without being in a relationship, for example. I've never been in a relationship - should I come with a warning label?
girls seriously some of your ideas are just disappointing. I mean...independence is a red flag?? I feel so sorry for you believing that. plus, have you ever heard of "introverts"?? Well, they exist, too! and the most disappointing thing: 5:08... seriously?!! I felt like I was listening to 15 years old girl and not a mature woman in a serious relationship. this video, was a waste of time.
Cat red flag wont introduce you to their cat funny😼 I think it depends with not dating someone for a while cuz they're medically sick like they have a bone marrow condition and I can't date I've had megablast anemia for five years I think that's an okay reason not to date cuz I really don't have the energy go out and meet people and trying to recover I think if someone is working on them self mentally emotionally to get over issues and they don't date for awhile I think that's a healthy thing if I do recover from the bone anemia I am definitely going to go on a date I still talk to my friends on the phone a little bit and my mom so I'm still socialized if you order takeout cuz of coronavirus I think that's okay I definitely think it's a red flag of someone doesn't date for certain reasons but not all the reasons
Hmmm this is already old fashioned
I am the red flag
Lol everything is a red flag
Kool
If she doesn't like the movie Carol 🚩🚩
Huh???
Gay red flag
😎😃😊😜😍😘💖
🚩
The whole premise of this video is horrible. Follow your feelings. You don't have to be as boring as these two.
Not wearing a mask in public is both a huge red flag and a deal breaker
Spelling women, womym. Passionate about certain old wave feminists. Basically TERF dog whistles.
Old wave feminists paved the way for you to have a much better life so have some respect!
You need to educate yourself and lose the shitty flippant attitude.
Welcome to the LGTBQ2+ party, you’re not the first to arrive. Learn some history.