Why did you do this to me?

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  • Опубликовано: 14 сен 2018
  • #fanvidfeed #domesticviolence #viddingisart #abuse #multifandom
    TRIGGER WARNING.
    For best quality I uploaded in 4K.
    This video is extremely personal and close to me. It's pretty much a relationship autobiography of mine of a very toxic relationship I was in for years.
    Started years ago, and he was addicted to K2, the synthetic marijauna, for the majority of our relationship. He got us evicted, multiple orders of protection, abuse, threats, we were homeless during my entire pregnancy, and he only recently got a job to help with anything during the last year.
    It got to the point that I was eventually responding to his aggression with aggression of my own, which only got CPS involved with our son. And losing him didn't even pause his addiction.
    Multiple promises of redemption and begging and improvement, nothing worked. Eventually he called himself leaving one day, moving out when I was gone to try and punish me, and I said it was over, refusing to let him back the next week.
    I had to move from our home of 3 years, because every room in the house was full of property damage, holes in walls and cabinets, too many reminders.
    I'm realizing I'd rather be alone, than stay with that for more years to come.
    The only good thing about our relationship is my two year old son, which finishes off the video.
    ------
    What you have is not love. It's some kind of evil alchemy. Where you amplify the most vile instincts in each other. You're toxic.
    You don't know me in the least do you?
    Yes, I do. We're a bad match.
    I cant do this anymore.
    I just said I was sorry.
    That's not enough.
    What have I ever done to you for you to treat me this way?
    What is wrong with me?
    Sometimes he looks at me like I disgust him.
    Get your hands off me.
    For what its worth I'm sorry.
    I don't know why I keep doing this.
    I'm a bastard when I drink.
    I'm going to go to counseling.
    Imma be good, baby I promise. You hear me?
    I'll do anything you want just forgive me please.
    Tell me what you want me to do and I'll do it.
    You don't mean that shit.
    And I thought it was my fault.
    Is this a game you want to play with me?
    What kind of man are you?
    I hate you.
    I loved you, I never would have hurt you. Why did you do this to me? To us?
    The things that I have given up, the pieces of myself that I have given away for you, and you treat me this way.
    You don't deserve anything.
    Do you even love me anymore?
    You took life from me, and you never even said I'm sorry.
    You don.t have to be so mean.
    I'm not trying to hurt you, I'm trying to get rid of you.
    I have spent too many years trying to protect your heart.
    Now you've made your choice.
    I need to protect mine.
    Is that what love feels like? Pain?
    I have no more fight left to give.
    I've got nothing left.
    I have nothing left.
    I'm done.
    I don't love you anymore.
    You have to let me go.
    The woman I am now, is done with you.
    You have to let me let you go.
    This cant be it.
    Then how come it is?
    I break up with you.
    And I will never be yours again.
    I think I already got the best part of you.
    We can have everything.
    What's left over just doesn't look so good anymore.
    The only thing that truly made me happy was my son.

Комментарии • 107

  • @maynardo4237
    @maynardo4237 4 года назад +397

    I like that you showed Belle and Rumple. Sometimes abuse isn’t always bloody noses and bruises.

  • @nixcie
    @nixcie 5 лет назад +275

    I searched "healthy relationships multifandom". This is what I got...
    I feel like I missed something

  • @cheflaurel7453
    @cheflaurel7453 4 года назад +131

    To all: Domestic violence comes in many forms both physical and mental/emotional, and can be done by anyone of any gender identity or sex to anyone regardless of their own gender identity or sex, in any kind of relationship whether romantic or not. All humans deserve kindness, respect for autonomous personhood and boundaries regardless of their similarities or differences to others boundaries, and the meeting of basic needs like food and shelter. We should have these things as a given we should not need to be super grateful for. If your relationship is toxic, please leave it and/or get good help.

    • @juileb197473051
      @juileb197473051 2 года назад +2

      He's not perfect,
      And I ain't either,
      But being completely honest with each other would totally increase love and trust and remove a lot toxicity and relieve some symptoms boundaries being broken.
      But someone who doesn't love you doesn't care enough about you to help you heal from the toxicity by doing what you ask and simply confessing, apologizing, and making right the offensive intrusive behavior

  • @thequeentaylor
    @thequeentaylor 5 лет назад +118

    This video is the definition of powerful and emotional. I am so sorry that you can relate so much to this video but you're a survivor and a warrior and I'm incredibly proud of you! While I was not physically hurt, I was extremely manipulated and gaslighted and abused in a different form so thank you so much for making this video for other women (and men) out there.

  • @Lilsweetiebrat420
    @Lilsweetiebrat420 4 года назад +53

    Currently crying my heart out for letting myself go through a toxic abusive relationship

  • @spinneret.
    @spinneret. 5 лет назад +44

    this is incredibly heartbreaking and I'm so sorry you went through that. I can't even begin to say how sorry I am! Thank you for telling your story and sharing it with everyone. ♥️

  • @AyaShan22
    @AyaShan22 5 лет назад +41

    This is so deep. I am so sorry for all that tou have been through. I am happy you are in a better place. Your edits shine through and they are a masterpiece! Thank you for sharing your story and edits.

  • @xLotsFanx
    @xLotsFanx 5 лет назад +27

    This is beautifully meaningful and very important. Thank you so much for making this. This hits so close to home for me, and I'm sure it's the same for many others who have been through similar things. You're strong for getting out of that situation, and you've created something that gives a voice to all those people out there that needed to see something like this. So again, thank you. Also, the editing is amazing!

  • @charliec5603
    @charliec5603 4 года назад +10

    I’m so sorry for what happened to you .you didn’t deserve that at all .Thank you for this edit it’s so beautiful,shows so many emotions so again thank you

  • @muhsinafaizazoyash2332
    @muhsinafaizazoyash2332 3 года назад +5

    "I have nothing left to give " it hits so hard....😔

  • @paperplanes2556
    @paperplanes2556 Год назад +3

    This is so stunning. I'm so happy more and more editors touch of this topic and raise awareness. Very very well done!! I love your editing style ❤️❤️

  • @lenakessal
    @lenakessal 4 года назад +5

    you know your relationship is fucked up when you relate to these

  • @zt544
    @zt544 4 года назад +25

    Getting into this kind of relationship terrifies me. I’ve never dated in my life because of it. I hate pain.

    • @salendriajefferson5230
      @salendriajefferson5230 4 года назад +4

      Z T I understand how you feel but you shouldn’t let that fear stop you from experiencing something potentially wonderful. Every relationship isn’t like this.

    • @gardenfairy8479
      @gardenfairy8479 4 года назад +2

      Talk about relationships!, I got beaten up by who I thought was my friend because his fiancee cheats on him and he came to my house because I hid it from him all I remember was punches everywhere. Friendships are toxic too

    • @salendriajefferson5230
      @salendriajefferson5230 4 года назад

      Jelali Malah
      They sure can be, sounds like it’s time for you to make some new friends.

    • @gardenfairy8479
      @gardenfairy8479 4 года назад

      @@salendriajefferson5230 yes when im done with therapy

    • @salendriajefferson5230
      @salendriajefferson5230 4 года назад +1

      Jelali Malah
      I’ll be cheering you on! 🥳👏

  • @mirahface1057
    @mirahface1057 3 года назад +8

    Great video! Some people may just see an edit but I see you raising awareness to domestic abuse, rapists, sexual abusers, verbal abusers and many more! Keep up the great work!

  • @1SnoWhiteQueen1
    @1SnoWhiteQueen1 5 лет назад +26

    This is so profoundly meaningful, I can really tell you poured your entire heart and soul into it! I'm so proud of you for putting this together so beautifully and telling your story most importantly for the fact that you have come out on top and are in a so much better place now.
    Also, I really love the definitions that you placed throughout the vid, from a pure editing standpoint it's so aesthetically pleasing LOL

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  5 лет назад +2

      I didn't even realize you had commented thank you so much I swear I poured my soul into this video

  • @shirleykurtz
    @shirleykurtz 3 года назад +3

    When my narc came back for the hoover: that when I asked that question. Why are you doing this to me? His answer said I wasn't special. He told me I was just there! I told him to get out, and I showed him the way to the door.

  • @Aaronholland2000
    @Aaronholland2000 2 года назад +1

    I could relate to this. My 2nd boyfriend was the worst thing I've ever put myself in.

  • @TeeMarie-he6vu
    @TeeMarie-he6vu Месяц назад

    I cried so hard❤❤❤❤ amazing, I relate to this greatly

  • @isaacmoreno-doing678
    @isaacmoreno-doing678 3 года назад +4

    The 1st Part is Helen from Diary of A Mad Black Woman!

  • @amylamb7794
    @amylamb7794 3 года назад +9

    I was sexually abuse by my friend and sexually abused by a classmate and physically abused by my older brother

    • @sarahl3464
      @sarahl3464 3 года назад +3

      My heart honestly broke hearing that I’m here if you need anyone 💕

    • @kaheelasterling3499
      @kaheelasterling3499 3 года назад +3

      God bless you . He is always with you , through your highs and lows . He loves you , have a relationship with Jesus Christ because he wants one with you .

    • @noemimikus3326
      @noemimikus3326 3 года назад +1

      Oh my God.. im so sorry...., but everytime you get down, you always stand up stronger, please don't give up, we love you❤

  • @yolandawooten-mitchell1404
    @yolandawooten-mitchell1404 Год назад

    Every aspect of this video describes my 2-year abusive relationship with my ex. i am weeping so hard because the terrible thing about this is: after you leave a toxic relationship, the trauma is still there. They continue with texts, phone calls, Facebook notifications, etc. I have an open domestic violence case that is pending for a court date with felony battery charges against him for strangulation/choking. we live in different states. I had to flee. Thank God for rescuing me from him. God makes an escape for you when you ask for it. God hates evil of all forms especially abuse. My heart goes out to anyone who is experiencing this nightmare. It is definitely on the rise!!! Silence is not optional. There are too many dead bodies at the hands of the abuser, man, no matter the gender. Please be safe and be wise. 1 Corinthians 13 expresses the right type of love, God"s love. This love is unconditional. Anything else outside of that love is evil.

  • @vanessa.b.s
    @vanessa.b.s 3 года назад +6

    What's the Name of the Song?

  • @AM-er3ic
    @AM-er3ic 5 лет назад +14

    Very emotional video. Heartbreaking. Are you able to list the names of the movies and/or shows you showed in this video?

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  5 лет назад +4

      absolutely. any scene in particular?

    • @AM-er3ic
      @AM-er3ic 5 лет назад +1

      @@LiviaWinchester Thank you! Not any one in particular. If it is not too much trouble, maybe you could list all shown in the video? I know some movies and shows are shown more than once, but if you could do that, I would greatly appreciate it! Thanks again!

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  5 лет назад +8

      @@AM-er3ic I uses the voiceover from Empire. The movies are Diary of a Mad Black Woman, The Duchess, Why did I Get Married, Petals on the Wind, Baby Boy, Girls Trip, Beaches, Hope Floats, Amazing Spiderman, Mother. TV shows are Scandal, Greys Anatomy, Mistresses, Once Upon A Time, Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill, Shameless, The 100, Friends, Reign

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  5 лет назад +5

      Also Madeas Family Reunion

    • @AM-er3ic
      @AM-er3ic 5 лет назад +1

      @@LiviaWinchester Thank you so much! 🙂🙂

  • @ananyadutta1154
    @ananyadutta1154 Год назад

    Can you sketch in enumerations the appellations of all the series and movies you have made references of?

  • @rae3599
    @rae3599 4 года назад +5

    What movie/show is the scene from where he is snapping at her? Also the scene where she says "and I thought it was my fault."

    • @livmanri2191
      @livmanri2191 4 года назад +1

      the and i thought it was my fault is from the movie about tonya hardeing

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  4 года назад +1

      The snapping scene is from "why did i get married?"

  • @user-mq1ym9dk5h
    @user-mq1ym9dk5h 2 года назад +1

    Which series are?

  • @sipporamonster8152
    @sipporamonster8152 4 года назад +10

    1:11 the scene with Ross and Rachel was not domestic violence, they broke up

    • @tobesthealien1254
      @tobesthealien1254 4 года назад +5

      But you could argue ross was abusive to rachel

    • @AshleyU18
      @AshleyU18 3 года назад +1

      It’s actually not Ross and Rachel it’s another couple Ross and Rachel starts at 1:12

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  2 года назад +1

      That scene was just meant for the imagery of someone begging for forgiveness

  • @noone-qp8ly
    @noone-qp8ly 3 года назад +2

    it bothers me that this was me for too long.

  • @tiya2958
    @tiya2958 3 года назад +3

    What the name of the movie in 1:22 pleaseeee??

  • @tiya2958
    @tiya2958 3 года назад +3

    What the name of the movie in 1:22 pls??

  • @gatinhosfofos7617
    @gatinhosfofos7617 3 года назад +3

    Peace please.

  • @urodlivyychtobyni265
    @urodlivyychtobyni265 3 года назад +2

    Can i ask what software did you use to edit this?

  • @foolinyou
    @foolinyou 2 года назад +1

    where does 1:11 from?

  • @VioletEmerald
    @VioletEmerald Год назад +1

    What a powerful Opening Quote. At first I thought it sounded like Fiona on Shameless speaking but I see it was from Empire when I Google. That's so powerful and kinda makes me want to watch Empire, plus all the vidding I've seen of that show is always so interesting. I'm so sorry you went through such a horrific and traumatic abusive dating relationship and that you had a son in that context and CPS had to be involved and everything. I am glad you are so grateful for your son and that you escaped the abuse finally. I know you were always in ViddersofSteel with me (I'm luvtheheaven5 but changed my username a couple years ago) and I never would've suspected you were going through such a home life. Although maybe your involvement in ViddersofSteel kinda ceased when all this started? I'm not sure. Either way, I'm just so sorry.
    I love how well this song also worked for this concept. Really powerful video.

  • @mthggg
    @mthggg 4 года назад +5

    what is the film at 1:05? Also great video. It was very moving and powerful

    • @daddychill3379
      @daddychill3379 4 года назад +3

      Miriam A it’s petals on the wind

    • @AshleyU18
      @AshleyU18 3 года назад +1

      @@daddychill3379 thank you

  • @denisakodadova6959
    @denisakodadova6959 4 года назад +2

    Please can you something tell me what is 0:24 ?????🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

  • @keyganmosebarmajor1601
    @keyganmosebarmajor1601 4 года назад +1

    Song??

    • @larakya
      @larakya 4 года назад +1

      zach berkman - down to the second

  • @annaganser1474
    @annaganser1474 4 года назад +1

    Song ?

    • @larakya
      @larakya 4 года назад +1

      zach berkman - down to the second

  • @sanaimartin3042
    @sanaimartin3042 3 года назад +2

    What's 1:26?

  • @serenitysoark2986
    @serenitysoark2986 4 года назад +3

    Derek and Meridith are toxic?

    • @LiviaWinchester
      @LiviaWinchester  4 года назад +1

      I sont think i have them in here. I have jo/brooke and her ex husband Paul. And christina crying when burke left

  • @coolioshark9702
    @coolioshark9702 3 года назад +2

    Someone save me...

  • @graveyardbabybrinkfangirl4234
    @graveyardbabybrinkfangirl4234 Год назад +1

    1:13 Ross never abused Rachel

  • @TeeMarie-he6vu
    @TeeMarie-he6vu Месяц назад

    What's the song??? 😢😢❤❤

  • @josieobrien5472
    @josieobrien5472 3 года назад +1

    What 1.22 from

  • @baokimng
    @baokimng 4 года назад +6

    1:15 please

    • @daddychill3379
      @daddychill3379 4 года назад +1

      Bảo Kim Nguyễn Lê petals on the wind

  • @ashleycarlathessymangoye5430
    @ashleycarlathessymangoye5430 3 года назад

    Title of 1:37 please

  • @madisonshore7026
    @madisonshore7026 5 лет назад +4

    What is 1:09 from

  • @colewright2293
    @colewright2293 4 года назад

    Song

  • @anissaanissa3272
    @anissaanissa3272 3 года назад +1

    Can I please get the name of 1:05 and name of 1:22 and 1:23 I think that they're the same but I don't really know

    • @sophiechall25
      @sophiechall25 3 года назад +1

      Petal on the wind, or something like that (I saw it on another comment)

    • @anissaanissa3272
      @anissaanissa3272 2 года назад +1

      @@sophiechall25 thanks 😊

  • @soranllyrodriguez278
    @soranllyrodriguez278 3 года назад +1

    Name 1:16

  • @lexis.9201
    @lexis.9201 4 года назад +2

    Whats 1:20

    • @livmanri2191
      @livmanri2191 4 года назад +1

      tonya harding a movie about the ice skater

  • @Ysabelcast89214
    @Ysabelcast89214 6 месяцев назад

    1:14

  • @tylerross4068
    @tylerross4068 5 лет назад +4

    What’s at 1:05

  • @Bella-jl2gi
    @Bella-jl2gi 4 года назад

    What is 1:54?

  • @sanaimartin3042
    @sanaimartin3042 3 года назад

    Sorry I mean 1:27

    • @dearlove7564
      @dearlove7564 3 года назад

      It's why did I get married ☺️

  • @tiya2958
    @tiya2958 3 года назад +1

    What the name of the movie in 1:03 pleaseeee?

  • @eli_280
    @eli_280 4 года назад +1

    Song ???

    • @munirawr
      @munirawr 3 года назад +1

      Zach berkman - down to the second

  • @tiya2958
    @tiya2958 3 года назад +2

    What the name of the movie in 1:15 pleaseeee?

  • @tiya2958
    @tiya2958 3 года назад +2

    What the name of the movie in 0:34 pleaseeee?