I always imagine my character just being like “Are you fucking kidding me? I was minding my own, then these assholes show up, your guys knock me unconscious and take all my shit, and NOW you’re gonna fucking execute me because you don’t wanna admit you might’ve fucked up?!” Or something of similar meaning in fewer words, then actually loving dragons initially for saving their life, and going with the Stormcloacks because A) yeah, not about to go with the guy who answers to the bitch who tried to have them killed. And B) from a meta standpoint, I know I get to kill captain bitch face. I keep her helmet as a trophy, and reminder that Empire is kind of an asshole. Then I find out the Stormcloaks are assholes too an just let them have their stupid little war while I align myself with various factions to leave myself presiding over a syndicate that probably has more actual control over the region than either government. And then both sides talk about taking Whiterun, but they know if they do, a super powerful, almost godlike individual will promptly join the other side, if not single handedly wreck their whole damn army, or maybe even just end the war by killing both sides, and the Thalmor in a Doom Slayer like fit of rage. Because let’s be honest, pretty much everyone has wanted that option at some point.
@@bigdaddykermit1616 My family consists of 1 dog, 2 children and a wife in whiterun whom I don’t know the names of any. Needless to say, you’re wrong !
@@MichaelJ44 no during the quest nobody escapes cidnha mine when talking to one of the forsworn he asks about your family and theres an option to say i have family but theyre far from skyrim
"Captain, what should we do? I forgot the list." "Forget the list, you go to the block." "By your orders Captain. I'm sorry Hadvar. Next time I'll remember the list."
Forget Skyrim, Sovngarde, the list, the block, the captain, the general, Lokir of Rorikstead, Ulfric Stormcloak, Ralof of Riverwood, and the prisoner that keeps reloading the game and remaking himself. He goes to the keep all the way in Anvil with me to *PAY THE FINE.*
Technically, she dies either way. Either the Dragon gets her first (Follow Hadvar), or you do (Follow Ralof, Ralof could get her if you just let him.) Oddly enough, she _has_ Rikke's voice actor (though she _isn't_ Rikke. Obviously.)
Alternate reality where it's Hadvar's personal journey to return the remains of a wronged Argonian to Black Marsh and dealing with it's impassable swamps. This started as a joke but that actually sounds really fun as a game or even just as a book.
It depends how you consoder the game to be finished. Skyrim has 4 endings: defeating Alduin, resolving the Civil War, the player getting tired to wander a playthrough with nothing left to do, and dying if you want a permadeath run. If he leaves Alduin to do his thing and burn him to ashes, he could have completed a run and achieved an ending: Dovahkiin is dead and the world is over.
“Hadvar! What’s taking so long over there?” “Captain, this prisoner has been morphing into different races and genders for the last ten minutes. And he, she, or it is not on the list.” “Forget the list. It goes to the block.”
"Captain, you're also not on the list..." "Forget the list; I go to the block!" "By your orders captain." "I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the block." "Follow yourself, captain."
I love that if you’re a High Elf the Thalmor, who are present for the execution, are 100% ok with the humans executing one of their own for literally no reason
The Thalmor consider all Altmer living outside of Aldmeri control to be traitors. If you talk to them as one, they basically say "You're a disgrace to our race".
"So I asked this prisoner who they were, and then all of a sudden, different races and different faces kept changing back and forth.. *..I've seen some shit."*
Nazeem, What are you doing here? Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list Forget the list, he goes to the block By your orders Captain I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the cloud district
General Tullius, this is unexpected is this a training exercise? Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list Forget the list, he goes to the block By your orders Captain I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the Summerset Isles.
A blue khajit? That's unexpected. And is that a dragonfly on your shoulder? Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list. Forget the list, he goes to the block. By your orders, captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the USB drive.
@@acanthaceae7896 Also Vvardenfell is being rebuilt by the time of skyrim and most of the land taken by the Argonians has been reclaimed. As of rn they've really only conquered south of mournhold
Look up an Austrain accent and look at a map in relation of German, France, Norway, and other western European places. Not hard to hear influences of one into the other, especially considering the reach of both Celtic and Roman civilizations.
"Captain? I thought you were standing right next to me?" "Captain, you're not on the list, what should we do with you?" "Forget the list, I go to the block!" "I'm sorry Captain, we'll make sure your remains return to the barracks..."
Father what are you doing here? Captain he's not on the lists what should we do with him? Forget the lists he goes to the block? By your orders captain I am sorry father we'll make sure your remains are returned to mother. Son you where the second biggest disappointment in my entire life.
his accent is TERRIBLE in the Helgen Opening Scene Overhaul mod. If u think his accent in this was bad then wait until u see his VA in that mod. Blegh.
+Corrupted Knight indeed. Couldn't of said it better myself. I have no problem with Scottish ppl but its as if the mod author said to the VA to not try and hide his accent at all. He sounded so out of place. The mod author should've chosen a Scandinavian VA, Hadvar's VA sounded nothing like a Nord. Usually mods r supposed to improve the game...Hadvar's new VA certainly didn't. I dont get why they changed Hadvar's VA but kept Ralof's original VA, I'm glad they didn't change it but its still confusing.
A Falmer, Why aren't you blind? Captain, what should we do? His name isn't on the list. Forget the list, he goes to the block. By your orders captain. I'm sorry, but none of us will risk returning your remains.
Moonlight Glaze Yes, Snow Elves is what they are. The dwarves just ruined their eyesight with poison, after the Nords committed genocide on their race.
Surprisingly, Hadvaar is a very respectful man! I was half expecting him to be rude or insulting, but instead, he really seems to be concerned and feel bad for the situation your character is forced into.
i felt the same way. when the dragon attacks the first thing he did was stand between the dragon and his prisoners protecting them. then he runs around the town trying to save people while ulfrick tries to escape. dudes the real mvp
As they should. Although the stormcloaks are mad racist it's obvious that not every Nord in the game is racist and some of them genuinely feel bad about how the other races are treated bc of the other Nords. They'll openly try their best to accommodate others, but I don't think I've seen a single decent High Elf in the game.
@@marangod2347 Legate is an exception I think as a Altmer speaking negatively about the Thalmor and actually doing it publicly is pretty neat so he's an exception. There's the distraction mage at the college, my gripe with her is that when dragons come down there she kinda just runs away, also she acts high and mighty, not as bad as Arcano but to a similar level
Yeah, I came all the way to Skyrim from Black Marsh by the order of An-Xileel themself as an ambassador to the Empire. Some weird guards caught me for absobutely nothing, and what do you think that dumb xhutha kuuda said? A FUKCING DOCKWORKER! And what do you think another, an even dumber kuuda said when I was not on their stupid list because I literally did nothing wrong? FORGET THE LIST, WE'LL FUCKING KILL AN AMBASSADOR FOR NO FUCKING REASON! I am sure that it is their standard procedure now to *fucking kill everyone they meet* . Good thing that my personal shelik'uth got to Helgen on time and explained to that bitch everything they needed to explain. I'm sitting in some city here right now, probably Whiterun, exhausted, angry and kaoc'. Would not recommend ever coming to this shithole of a province. Cold weather, harsh people, dumb guards, both Hist sap and skooma are illegal here.
Hadvar: I've never seen a Falmer out here in the open. What cave did you crawl out of? Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list. Captain: Forget the list, he goes to the block. Hadvar: By your orders captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are sent to Blackreach. Falmer: I don't even know where I am I CAN'T SEE.
Snow Elf Edition Hadvar: "What kind of elves are you? Are you one of the- No, that can't be right." "Captain, what should we do? S/he's not on the list." Captain: "Forget the list, S/he goes to the block." Hadvar: "By your orders captain." "I'm sorry Falmer, we'll be sure your remains are sent underground somewhere in the north." Snow Elf Dragonborn: >:T (How one would interpet that, I dunno) Redone 2022 edition: Hadvar: "You look remarkably pale for an Altmer. A disease, perhaps?" "Captain, what should we do? S/he's not on the list." Captain: "Forget the list, s/he goes to the block." Hadvar: "By your orders captain." _Insert basic Altmer/High Elf dialogue._ And just like that, I made it much more believable.
+Raze Ninjato i think that if the player was a dwemer/deep elf or snow elf then he/she would be released cause they are from a race considered extinct.
Hadvar: I'm not staring at anyone right now. Captain: Forget that. YOU go on the block. Hadvar: By your orders captain. *Holds a mirror in front of himself* I'm sorry. I'll make sure my remains are returned to Riverwood.
Hadvar: by the nine, a Daedra walks Among Us!! To the block!! Captain: Is he on the list? Hadvar: TO HELL WITH THE LIST, BACK TO THE UNDERWORLD FROM WHENCE YOU CAME!!
You gotta love how the captain says you still must die after Hadvar brings up the fact you are a high elf and POSSIBLY part of the Thalmor and killing you could start a wa
@UCxB-jz_Raex8ZBct_uvXXyA Silencing Elenwen might be a bad idea. This got cut but Elenwen and Tullius were supposed to have an animated discussion where she demand Ulfric be delivered to the Thalmor and Tullius telling her to fuck off.
Hadvar: you're a long way from the Imperial City, what are you doing in Skyrim? Dragonborn: Well actually, I'm one of your soldiers and I was held prisoner by the Stormcloaks Captain: FORGET THE LIST, HE GOES TO THE BLOCK
Its obvious The Captain and Dragonborn were bitter rivals, she finally has the upper hand! Or she's a Stormcloak spy. Her machinations lay undetected for years. For she is a master of deception.
"I'm not sure why I'm even standing in this line, Captain...." "Captain, what should I do? I'm not on the list." "Forget the list! You go to the block." "By your orders, Captain." "I'm sorry, me. I'll be sure to greet myself in Sovngarde."
Headsman? What are you doing here? You should be over by the block. Captain he's not on the list what should we do? Forget the list, he goes to the block. By your orders captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are... left at the block I guess?
The main reason I would never join the imperials. Like 'You guys wanted to execute me without knowing anything, but now that I could be an asset, you suddenly want to recruit me... Yeah, I think I'll pass'
@@DrakRiku1994 See, joining the Imperials makes sense if you want stability, order and a chance to resist the Aldmeri Dominion since Stormcloaks cause rebellions and chaos, but they really should have considered for a moment the implication that you, the Dragonborn, are joining the faction that wanted you dead for literally being in the wrong place at the wrong time. They should have done something for you, like maybe an additional quest before you join them that gives you like gold and some materials for crafting or something? Idk, something to compensate you for the emotional shock that you probably had experienced thinking that you were gonna die for being at the border at the wrong time.
@@Misanthropolis Men i just join the Imperials only because Balgruuf and Elisif are cool, they wanted to kill me at the beginning, they torture people and they are very represive with the people, and they are NOT thinking about resist the Thalmor, besides, Skyrim is a Nord land, being honest it should be a Nord like Ulfric the Supreme King, you cannot blame the Stormcloaks nords for trying to protect their homeland and resist against the Altmer Dominion, btw im not saying that being racist with another races is ok, just saying that they objective is a step to fight against the real enemy
@@shaikustandalone Except the Imperials are also interested in taking out the Dominion, they just think that they first need to control all of Tamriel to get everyone on the same page, while the Stormcloaks just want to selfishly protect their own land and as a result they cause a lot of chaos and suffering by wrestling against the Imperials. In a time of war, instability, infighting and chaos are NOT things that one should have. Hard to be on the same page when your approach to the same issue is drastically different.
Well, anyone would be intrigued by your race if they saw you stand there for half an hour constantly morphing your race and facial features into something completely different.
"What in *OBLIVION is that?!" "Captain that dragon's not on the list" "Forget the list, Alduin goes on the block" "I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are sent into time itself"
"Todd Howard? Something here just doesn't seem to work..." ""Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list" "Forget the list. He goes to the block" "By your orders. Captain" "I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to the Chess Club"
The fact that hodvar tries to spare you from the execution, pointing that you are not on the list, and after he says your remains are returned to your homeland is just so nice of him, you clearly sees that he has empaty towards you.
By the Eight, a snow elf? But your race was driven underground ages ago! Captain, what should we do, he's not on the list. Forget the list, he goes to the block. By your orders captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are sent back to... oh, wait... um... Skyrim, I guess...
-Where do you come from Redgard? -Do you come to the cloud district very often? What am I saying? Of course you don’t! -Captain, he’s definitely on the list...
Went back to replay skyrim. Was running up to whiterun to tell balgruuf about the dragon.. Saw Nazeem walking there with his lil swagger. went up and attacked him and a fucking execution animation played out. His. wife. was. right. there. She was right there behind him. She watched me headbutt him at the speed of light until his skull probably caved into his brain. I dont regret anything.
Daddy's Little I saw you do that. I hated him too and I'm glad you came to skyrim to do his head in (literally), I'm sorry I had to imprison you but it's my job. It wouldn't have happened if I didn't get guard duty, unlike my cousin that is out fighting dragons.
Hadvar: By the nines! It's Talos! Captain: What should we do? He's not on the list. Captain: Forget the list. He goes to the block. Hadvar: By your orders, captain. I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to the 8.
Hadvar: A draugr? You from one of the burial grounds? Hadvar: Captain. What should we do? He's not on the list. Captain: Forget the list. He goes to the block. Hadvar: By your orders, Captain. Hadvar: I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to where ever your hellish kind comes from. Draugr: VOLLK ISSH KAA
Formidable Foe goes to show how retardedly, overly "offended" people make themselves to be ...especially when it was meant as a respectable thing back in the day
Hadvar: "Ah Hadvar, you really are stupid aren't you?" Hadvar: "Captain, what should we do with me? I'm not on the list." Captain: "Forget the list, you go to the block." Hadvar: "By your order Captain. I'm sorry Hadvar, I will make sure my ashes be returned to Riverwood... Somehow..."
Friendly Engineer Hadvar: “ah Hadvar, you’re really stupid aren’t I” Hadvar: “captain what should we do I’m not on the list” Captain: “forget the list... he...you? Go to the block” Hadvar: “I’m sorry me but Youll make sure my remains are returned to riverwood”
A dremora? How did you end up in our World?? Captain. what should we do? he's not on the list. forget the list. He goes to the block. By your orders, captain. I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to Oblivion. Somehow...
Did you just assume my mortality? Just because you fleshy things die doesn't mean everything else is. My animus will return to Oblivion without your help, thank you very much.
"Hadvar asks the dremora to follow him, so they may escape helgen after the attack." Hadvar: over here, follow me, prisoner Dremora: i will feast...on your flesh! "dremora stabs Hadvar" yeah..that's probably how that would end XD.
“Block, what should we do? He’s not on the Captain?” “Forget the Captain, he goes to the prisoner” “By your orders, block” “I’m sorry, we’ll make sure your homeland is returned to your remains.” “Follow the block, list.”
"We'll make sure your remains re returned to Morrowind." Yeah, cremate the Dark Elf and return the remains to Morrowind, the ashes won't be out of place.
@@redbulljones not all of morrowind. It's likely Vvardenfell and a lot of the nearby coastline like Ebonheart, Firewatch and Davons Watch are devestated (Not only by Baar Dau crashing into Vivec City). Solstheim is much closer to the red mountain than say Narsis.
-The List! What are you doing here? You should be in my hands; Captain, What should we do? He's a list! -Forget the list, he goes to the block. -By your orders captain. -I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains will be used to make a good toilet paper. -Line up to extinction.
H: Captain! What are you doing here? Captain, what should we do? C: Forget the list, I go to the block. H: By your orders Captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure... wait... what?
Hadvar: "You from one of the strongholds, Orc? How did you end up here?" Urag gro-Shub: "I am a librarian at the College of Winterhold!" Hadvar: "Captain, what should we do, he's not on the list." Urag gro-Shub: "Please make sure your hands are clean before touching that list." Hadvar: "What?" Urag gro-Shub: "I don't want to see you treating that list poorly. Are we clear?" Hadvar: "Uhh..." Urag gro-Shub: "I would be honored. Beyond honored to have such a list here at the College." Hadvar: *looks at list* "I'm sorry. I'll make sure you're sent to the Arcaneum."
"Captain, what should we do? He isn't on the list." "Forget the list. He goes to the block." "I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to Todd Howerd "
@@Scringus I started playing it on the Switch, its the only version i own, its also the only game besides Dark Souls Remastered i’ve put over 70 hours into
Glowaru you do know stereotypes exist for a reason right? They're the typical traits you run into like white people being rich or black people leaping like frogs, or Jews being extortionists, though my favorite is how brown people like me are typically the help
Just Imperial profiling... isn't it kind of him though, to assure you that your remains will be sent to the nation your race is most common, regardless of where you may actually be from. ... seems a lot like something the thalmor did with the Blades, so kind of them xD
*Playing as a khajiit spellsword who was born and raised in Skyrim, as well as all the the other descendants of her great-great-grandmother* _We'll make sure your remains are returned to Elsweyr_ N'wah wtf?
*playing as my Nerevarine, my hero of Kvatch, and literally every single protagonist who is a Redguard born in Morrowind* - We'll return your remains to Hammerfell
The block?? By the gods how did you get here Captain what should we do its not on the list For get the list it goes to the block We will make sure your remains are placed where the block goes.
Hadvar: by the gods a Dragon I thought you were stories What should we do captain he is not on the list Captain: forget the list he goes to the block Hadvar: we will make sure your remains are uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............ used to craft armour Dragon : how did you even catch me?
Picturing a dragon just standing in line with a bunch of humans curiously asking "how did you even catch me?" made me laugh the hardest I've laughed this month. Well done, take this upvote.
+Mollendokter boer The headless man???? What on earth- Caption what should we do he is not on the list Forget the list he goes to the block by your orders caption, just how do we decapitate a headless man?
Well, there were 3 reasons that made me a Stormcloak. 1- This bitch captain 2- Ralof is a good bro 3- Ulfric's talk with Galmar at The Palace of Kings (that gave me chills)
There is actually a save spot before the character creation, so all he'd have to do is start right before "who are you" from Hadvar, then select a random preset and listen to Hadvar's reply. A hero, yes, but more the way we use "hero" now, which is to describe using slightly more effort than being asleep.
Hadvar: A dwarf!? But the legends say that you all died thousands of years ago! Captain, what should we do? He’s not on the list. Captain: Forget the list, he goes to the block. Hadvar: by your orders, captain. I’m sorry, I’ll make sure your remains are returned to...wait...you must be the last of your kind! We can’t do thi- Captain: I said, he goes to the block!
Hadvar: ?????? TORYGG? YOU'RE NOT DEAD? BY THE GODS! Capitan, there is no reason for war, Torygg isn't dead, and not even on the list, what should we do? Capitan: Forget the list, he goes to the block. Hadvar: B-but he's the High King of Skyrim...
Captain's fiance at their wedding: "Honey, i think the guy near the champagne is your great uncle Julius, but i don't see him on the guests list" Captain: "forget the list, he goes to the block"
Cats are, how do i put this gently? A bag of cunts? They suck. The only redemptive quality they have is that they poop and shit in a box, that then needs to be cleaned and smells horrid.
iona2225 rather have a small dried poop in a box which can be picked up with a scooper than having to pick up a warm wet dog poop off the street with a bag over my hand
Hadvar: I've never seen a Dragon before what realm did you fly from? Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list Captain: forget the list, he goes to the block Hadver: by your orders captain, I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are send to oblivion Dragon: IM FUCKING ALDUIN YOU IGNORANT MILKDRINKER
By Shor a Dwemer! I thought your kind was extinct! Captain, what should we do? His name isn't on the list. Forget the list, he goes to the block. By your orders captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are uhhhh.... evaporated? Line up to extinction.
Player: *Obviously not a rebel*
Captain: "Forget the list...."
Hadvar: "I'm sowwy"
OwO
QwQ
I always imagine my character just being like “Are you fucking kidding me? I was minding my own, then these assholes show up, your guys knock me unconscious and take all my shit, and NOW you’re gonna fucking execute me because you don’t wanna admit you might’ve fucked up?!”
Or something of similar meaning in fewer words, then actually loving dragons initially for saving their life, and going with the Stormcloacks because A) yeah, not about to go with the guy who answers to the bitch who tried to have them killed. And B) from a meta standpoint, I know I get to kill captain bitch face. I keep her helmet as a trophy, and reminder that Empire is kind of an asshole. Then I find out the Stormcloaks are assholes too an just let them have their stupid little war while I align myself with various factions to leave myself presiding over a syndicate that probably has more actual control over the region than either government.
And then both sides talk about taking Whiterun, but they know if they do, a super powerful, almost godlike individual will promptly join the other side, if not single handedly wreck their whole damn army, or maybe even just end the war by killing both sides, and the Thalmor in a Doom Slayer like fit of rage.
Because let’s be honest, pretty much everyone has wanted that option at some point.
@@JustinTK416 HELL YEAH BOI
OwO
Me: Names my character "Not on the list"
Hadvar: "He's not on the list"
Me: "You're damn right"
Loll
Underrated
@@assassindancer914 fr
lmao
I called myself dragonborn so people call me by my name
*_F O R G E T T H E L I S T H E G O E S T O T H E B L O C K_*
CHEEKI BREEKI Blyat ooo
One of the main reason to escape with Ralof: you can kill that Bitch
*She Black???*
*B Y Y O U R O R D E R S C A P T A I N*
you typing like that makes me die inside
"Captain! There's a dragon attacking!"
"Forget the dragon. He goes to the block"
By your orders, Captain
"By your orders, ca- YOL...TOOR SHUUUUUL"
Classic rikke
Everybody gangsta until they see a dragon up close
@@Fr0staX it's yo to shol*
Hadvar: Captain, hes on the list.
Captain: Forget the list, he goes free.
Hadvar: MAKE UP YOUR MIND CAPTAIN.
First one in this comment section to make me chuckle in real life.
FREEDOOOM
Proof that the captain doesn't know what she's doing XD
Jaeden Edwards best and worst Captain ever. Others get death for being on the list but we go free
Five years late, but this is really funny lol
Damn imperials love their lists
2 minutes later: forget the list he goes to the block
How ironic
*Empire loves their damned lists
I can just imagine the dragonborn looking over at Ralof and giving him an "are you fucking kidding me" look.
Eat your cereal
Kev Man just thinking that same thing
*picks skeleton*
Hadvar: You picked a bad time to get reanimated, Undead.
Dragonborn: "It's a beautiful day outside.."
Is there an undead race mod?
@@Irimu_ if you ask is there a ____ race mod, the answer is probably yes, at least 5 variants of it
A skeleton? You're gonna have a bad time
Captain, what should we do, he’s not on the list
Executing a high elf and shipping their remains to their homeland seems like kind of a bitchy political moves, dont you think?
I'm pretty sure that he's saying this only to calm the protagonist a little
No one's shipping decapitated remains of a mr nobody.
Expecially in times of war.
@@wv8d im pretty sure the dragonborn actually has family oitside of skyrim
@@bigdaddykermit1616
My family consists of 1 dog, 2 children and a wife in whiterun whom I don’t know the names of any. Needless to say, you’re wrong !
@@MichaelJ44 no during the quest nobody escapes cidnha mine when talking to one of the forsworn he asks about your family and theres an option to say i have family but theyre far from skyrim
"Tell me, what's your race again?"
The 6' cat in front of him: "Nord"
"Ah, yes. An Argonian from Hammerfell."
@@HunhowsShadowStalker those people with curved axes?
@Crow no its axes man
"We'll make sure your remains are returned to High Rock."
"I'm sorry, I'll make sure you're remains are returned to Hammerfell."
"Captain, what should we do? I forgot the list."
"Forget the list, you go to the block."
"By your orders Captain. I'm sorry Hadvar. Next time I'll remember the list."
Next time?
hahahaha this comment made my day!
"Follow the Captain, Hadvar"
It started off funny but you ruined it
@@timhook2086 me?
The plottwist is that the "list" is just a notebook he's doodling in. No one is actually on the list.
He is just drawing rule 34 pics of the captain
@@SilverGamingFI ... seriously m8
Forget the block. She goes to the cock.
Forget the list and block and the prisoner. She's going home with me.
Forget Skyrim, Sovngarde, the list, the block, the captain, the general, Lokir of Rorikstead, Ulfric Stormcloak, Ralof of Riverwood, and the prisoner that keeps reloading the game and remaking himself. He goes to the keep all the way in Anvil with me to *PAY THE FINE.*
_"Captain, what should we do? Sweetrolls aren't on the list."_
_"Forget the list. They go in cart."_
forget the list, they go in my belly
"Forget the list. They go in my pocket."
I'm sorry. We'll make sure your tasty remains returns to the Bannered mare.
forget the list, someone stole them
BY YOUR ORDERS CAPTAIN! 😋
i like how he turns french everytime he says where your remains will be sent to
I have played skyrim for many years, never have i ever noticed that, and now i cant unhear it. lol
Oh my lord I never noticed, why does he do that lmao
@83rdox
The breton families names are French and « breton » is the French name of the people of Brittany (a French region).
I thought I was the only one who noticed. And in all my playthroughs, I never noticed it. I never noticed it until I watched this video
Your sandwich won't save you now, fat boy! - The Spy
*Empire loves their damn lists*
*2 minutes later*
The Empire: *fOrGeT tHe lIST!*
The Captain is definitely a Stormcloak spy.
@@crypt1k755 too bad ralof kills her
If you choose to follow ralof in the beghonning of skyrim you get to fight the captain and an imperial general
jajajaja is true!! perhaps she said that he forgot the list precisely because she heard those words XDD
Pffft-
Hadvar knows the homeland of every race. He would make a good social worker if only he would stop chopping people's heads off.
But he didn't. The captain wanted to. I never got into the Civil War questline. Please tell me she dies
Chrisroder B She dies if you choose to go with the Stormcloak guy right at the beginning of the game.
Technically, she dies either way. Either the Dragon gets her first (Follow Hadvar), or you do (Follow Ralof, Ralof could get her if you just let him.)
Oddly enough, she _has_ Rikke's voice actor (though she _isn't_ Rikke. Obviously.)
Wait she isn't Rikke?
I had thought she was Rikke for years.
BIPPITY BAP BOOP BOP no, Rikke is a legate not a captain.
"I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to Black Marsh."
"yeah good luck with that, pal."
Alternate reality where it's Hadvar's personal journey to return the remains of a wronged Argonian to Black Marsh and dealing with it's impassable swamps. This started as a joke but that actually sounds really fun as a game or even just as a book.
@@Sparking_Ram sounds like something I’d read
@@Sparking_Ram This litterally sounds like the plot of Far Cry 4, but in Skyrim
Yeah sure dump my carcass close to the borderline of cyrodil and blackmarsh and call that good? Im not for that. Nor for dying yet.
@@Sparking_Ram they probably settle for close borderlands and leave your body to rot unburied in the swamp.
Plot twist: he actually finished every game before he chose a new race
ABSOLUTE MADLAD
It depends how you consoder the game to be finished. Skyrim has 4 endings: defeating Alduin, resolving the Civil War, the player getting tired to wander a playthrough with nothing left to do, and dying if you want a permadeath run. If he leaves Alduin to do his thing and burn him to ashes, he could have completed a run and achieved an ending: Dovahkiin is dead and the world is over.
@@Adahn99 Its Alduin, my dude. Nit Anduin.
@@Ajay-dy3xw My bad, I did nOt read my comment again. It happens, I corrected it, thank you
Woooow
Khajiit be like:
"I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to elsewhere".
like: *fuck it, you ain't staying in skyrim*
M0D I don’t know where you’ll go, but it sure as hell ain’t here
this made me laugh a bit too hard.
“Where?”
“Elsweyr”
“Elsewhere where?”
“Elsweyr!”
“Where where elsewhere?!”
“ELSWEYR!”
@@SharkyMcSnarkface No, What is the guy's name on Second Base.
I don't know!
Oh, he's on Third. We're not talking about him.
“Hadvar! What’s taking so long over there?”
“Captain, this prisoner has been morphing into different races and genders for the last ten minutes. And he, she, or it is not on the list.”
“Forget the list. It goes to the block.”
Best!
Absolutely perfect, have a medal.
10 minutes? Try 30+ and then another 30 when I realize the nose looks odd from a certain angle lmao
This is so true
Shapeshifter: I'll turn into a chicken!!!! Uhhh.... uh oh.
"Captain, you're also not on the list..."
"Forget the list; I go to the block!"
"By your orders captain."
"I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the block."
"Follow yourself, captain."
Need more likes lmao
😂😂
This reminds me of "even the cop gets in trouble" comic.
underrated comment xDD
The paradox ending
Conspiracy: The captain is secretly a stormcloak because she doesn’t like lists.
Exactly!
Good point
That is why they started the war
the empire and their damned lists..
She's not a stormcloak
I love that if you’re a High Elf the Thalmor, who are present for the execution, are 100% ok with the humans executing one of their own for literally no reason
Ellie Nixon The Thalmor only care about those who wear their robes/armor.
Except when you wear them on a high elf character for the entire game and literally nobody pays any attention to it outside of the embassy quest.
And if you run while in the embassy they fire upon you, or if you meet them outside on patrol and ask the wrong questions you get attacked.
The Thalmor consider all Altmer living outside of Aldmeri control to be traitors. If you talk to them as one, they basically say "You're a disgrace to our race".
What’s the difference between a brick and the Thalmor? A brick will actually help rebuild Skyrim.
"So I asked this prisoner who they were, and then all of a sudden, different races and different faces kept changing back and forth..
*..I've seen some shit."*
He should be made general for all the things he's experienced.
damn i miss rogue
Divided Reality big titty onee san race
Name checks out.
Yay a rougeshadow reference
"We didn't realise you were a lizard until now. Anyway, onto the chopping block."
Reptilian shape-shifters man...
Ohh a lux main and a yasuo main walk in to a bar...the ban wagon is real
@@Local_commentor Replace lux with Yone
RUclips algorithm : *watch this video*
Me: *by your orders, captain*
Forget the algorithm, RUclips goes to the block.
Nazeem, What are you doing here?
Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list
Forget the list, he goes to the block
By your orders Captain
I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the cloud district
General Tullius, this is unexpected is this a training exercise?
Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list
Forget the list, he goes to the block
By your orders Captain
I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the Summerset Isles.
Cyrodiil*
A blue khajit? That's unexpected. And is that a dragonfly on your shoulder?
Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list.
Forget the list, he goes to the block.
By your orders, captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to the USB drive.
@@I_am_always_correct Inigo!
Why is he sorry?
A single molecule: *exists*
Captain: " *H E G O E S T O T H E B L O C K* "
I guess it's her fetish or something ...
for hee to cut a molecule she needs a power equivilant to the sun or even more
so basiclt shes an ascended god
@Killerbug7 0
Block: **exists**
Captain: Forget the block he goes to the block
Gonna send her maker to the block in a minute
I always go with Ralof so I can kill that bitch-captain-lady
Me: *Being a Dunmer after the Red Year.
Hadvar: We'll make sure your remains are returned to Morrowind.
Me: Please don't
But isn't the north of morrowind still intact?
@@dumbalek6001 but it's controlled by the argonians at this moment so it wouldn't be a good idea
@@voidlessazasin1572 the south its controled by the argonians not north
@@acanthaceae7896 Also Vvardenfell is being rebuilt by the time of skyrim and most of the land taken by the Argonians has been reclaimed. As of rn they've really only conquered south of mournhold
@@starwars4427 im kinda new to the lore so thanks
It sounds like hadvar had a French accent during his "I'm sorry" line
As a French I've just said "I'm sorry", and it's doesn't sound like Hadvar tbh, try "am sori" on Google translate with the French voice
His accent definitely changes on that line. Maybe not the "sorry" specifically but there are definitely some French-sounding r's in there
Look up an Austrain accent and look at a map in relation of German, France, Norway, and other western European places. Not hard to hear influences of one into the other, especially considering the reach of both Celtic and Roman civilizations.
I think it's more british accent
It doesn't sound British.
"Captain? I thought you were standing right next to me?"
"Captain, you're not on the list, what should we do with you?"
"Forget the list, I go to the block!"
"I'm sorry Captain, we'll make sure your remains return to the barracks..."
KFBEL XD
This made my entire day. Thank you.
Good one i laughed so hard XD
KFBEL lol
Father what are you doing here? Captain he's not on the lists what should we do with him? Forget the lists he goes to the block? By your orders captain I am sorry father we'll make sure your remains are returned to mother. Son you where the second biggest disappointment in my entire life.
Hadvar's accent changes more than my character's features in the customization menu tbh
his accent is TERRIBLE in the Helgen Opening Scene Overhaul mod. If u think his accent in this was bad then wait until u see his VA in that mod. Blegh.
his voice is like throwing a pickle in the toilet and then lelling *AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, DAS GUD* just to fuck with people
+Corrupted Knight
indeed. Couldn't of said it better myself. I have no problem with Scottish ppl but its as if the mod author said to the VA to not try and hide his accent at all. He sounded so out of place. The mod author should've chosen a Scandinavian VA, Hadvar's VA sounded nothing like a Nord. Usually mods r supposed to improve the game...Hadvar's new VA certainly didn't.
I dont get why they changed Hadvar's VA but kept Ralof's original VA, I'm glad they didn't change it but its still confusing.
@@AnyxRaven That sounds like one of HowToBasic's videos.
@@Pumpkin525I approve
Hadvar responds to any race: You from your homeland? Cool
Hadvar responds to argonian and khajiit: are you from a caravan, dock worker, or thief?
Also with bretons
Or skooma dealer.
Why are we Argonians still disrespected, we’re poor because it took them years to set us free.
@@druiamald7018 Haha farming tool think it people
@@druiamald7018 Dunmers: Why is this farm tool talking?
A Falmer, Why aren't you blind?
Captain, what should we do? His name isn't on the list.
Forget the list, he goes to the block.
By your orders captain.
I'm sorry, but none of us will risk returning your remains.
Ashlei Paginton Lmao
What were they originally called? Snow elf's?
Lol
Moonlight Glaze Yes, Snow Elves is what they are. The dwarves just ruined their eyesight with poison, after the Nords committed genocide on their race.
We need a mod for all these make the races playable just for these lines lmfao
"Another refugee? Gods really have abandone your people, Dark Elf."
**sigh** you can say that again.
**says it again**
well thats Neloths fault.
*cries in missing Vivec*
The Tribunal abandoned us, but the Reclamations never will.
@@maximillionchaoswolf Why? What did Neloth do?
Hadvar: Who are you *a long awkward silence*
I'm Preston Grarvey commonwealth Minutemen and there's another settlement that needs your help
Joe Lowes "Captain he's not on the list"
Forget the list. He goes to the block.
DragonFighter732 by your orders. I'm sorry prisoner, We'll be sure to send your remains to this commonwealth place.
Joe Lowes omfg xD this is now one of my favourite things
Your remains will be sent *to a nearby settlement that needs your help*
0:02 Hadvar: "You've picked a bad time to..."
Me: "...get lost, friend."
Hadvar: "...come home to Skyrim, kinsman."
Me: "Oh."
Battle music plays
Honestly same lmao
Legendary
I searched for this comment, not gonna lie
Never should have come here
I spent my whole life dreaming of moving to Skyrim, only for them to kill me and send my remains out of their country :(
Propobly should be a word
**Province**
Pretty sure you would be a nord
@@Raito73 We found the Imperial agent!
Welcome to America 💀
Surprisingly, Hadvaar is a very respectful man! I was half expecting him to be rude or insulting, but instead, he really seems to be concerned and feel bad for the situation your character is forced into.
KrikaGamerLog +1 reason to side with the Empire
Erena Jäger I prefer to stop the war the peaceful way. With the greybeards.
Hadvar is bae
i felt the same way. when the dragon attacks the first thing he did was stand between the dragon and his prisoners protecting them. then he runs around the town trying to save people while ulfrick tries to escape. dudes the real mvp
Fox McLoud Also, following Hadvar means you get both a gift from Alvor and can take the ingots from his forge without stealing them.
*chooses High Elf
“I’m sorry, we’ll make sure your remains are sent to Oblivion”
**where they belong...**
@@Azrael_Equinox mhm... damned N’Wah
As they should. Although the stormcloaks are mad racist it's obvious that not every Nord in the game is racist and some of them genuinely feel bad about how the other races are treated bc of the other Nords. They'll openly try their best to accommodate others, but I don't think I've seen a single decent High Elf in the game.
@@babygurleatsshickennuggits4201 Well theres Legate Fasendil in the rift I think
@@marangod2347 Legate is an exception I think as a Altmer speaking negatively about the Thalmor and actually doing it publicly is pretty neat so he's an exception. There's the distraction mage at the college, my gripe with her is that when dragons come down there she kinda just runs away, also she acts high and mighty, not as bad as Arcano but to a similar level
Argonian: "I am the King of Black Marsh and my people!"
Hadar: " Dockworker eh?"
“The lizard in rags”
Me as an Argonain: 😡😡😡😡😡
Argonian: [TRIGGERED]
😂
"Next time I hear another GOD DAMN farm tool joke-"
Yeah, I came all the way to Skyrim from Black Marsh by the order of An-Xileel themself as an ambassador to the Empire. Some weird guards caught me for absobutely nothing, and what do you think that dumb xhutha kuuda said? A FUKCING DOCKWORKER! And what do you think another, an even dumber kuuda said when I was not on their stupid list because I literally did nothing wrong? FORGET THE LIST, WE'LL FUCKING KILL AN AMBASSADOR FOR NO FUCKING REASON! I am sure that it is their standard procedure now to *fucking kill everyone they meet* . Good thing that my personal shelik'uth got to Helgen on time and explained to that bitch everything they needed to explain. I'm sitting in some city here right now, probably Whiterun, exhausted, angry and kaoc'. Would not recommend ever coming to this shithole of a province. Cold weather, harsh people, dumb guards, both Hist sap and skooma are illegal here.
“You’re a long way from the Imperial City. What happened?”
“Nothing I’d like to talk about”
Bye
Farewell!
...
What's new with you?
@@thenextarbiter What's the news from the other provinces?
@@cicak2404 They say syndicates of wizards have led a boycott of Imperial goods in the land of the Altmer.
@@thenextarbiter Yes
Hadvar: I've never seen a Falmer out here in the open. What cave did you crawl out of? Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list.
Captain: Forget the list, he goes to the block.
Hadvar: By your orders captain. I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are sent to Blackreach.
Falmer: I don't even know where I am I CAN'T SEE.
Snow Elf Edition
Hadvar: "What kind of elves are you? Are you one of the- No, that can't be right." "Captain, what should we do? S/he's not on the list."
Captain: "Forget the list, S/he goes to the block."
Hadvar: "By your orders captain." "I'm sorry Falmer, we'll be sure your remains are sent underground somewhere in the north."
Snow Elf Dragonborn: >:T (How one would interpet that, I dunno)
Redone 2022 edition:
Hadvar: "You look remarkably pale for an Altmer. A disease, perhaps?" "Captain, what should we do? S/he's not on the list."
Captain: "Forget the list, s/he goes to the block."
Hadvar: "By your orders captain." _Insert basic Altmer/High Elf dialogue._
And just like that, I made it much more believable.
+Raze Ninjato i think that if the player was a dwemer/deep elf or snow elf then he/she would be released cause they are from a race considered extinct.
Hadvar: I'm not staring at anyone right now.
Captain: Forget that. YOU go on the block.
Hadvar: By your orders captain. *Holds a mirror in front of himself* I'm sorry. I'll make sure my remains are returned to Riverwood.
SOMEONE MAKE THIS INTO A SHORT COMIC
Hadvar: by the nine, a Daedra walks Among Us!! To the block!!
Captain: Is he on the list?
Hadvar: TO HELL WITH THE LIST, BACK TO THE UNDERWORLD FROM WHENCE YOU CAME!!
Me: my character will be called “on the list”
Hadvar: “he’s not on the list”
Me: “liar”
Now I'll have to name myself "not on the-list."
@@alduintheanti-dragonborn That’s actually a good Argonian name lol
“Not-On-The-List”
@@theunbrokenlegion1709 Wow, and it really is believable.
You turned the list against me
@@MrTzatziki115 You have done that yourself.
"he goes to the block"
Hadvar: sowwy🥺
Didn't know Hadvar was Canadian
I'm sowwy uwu
@@CannotBeVerified NO
@@Garykem8 😂
If he was a Dwemer,you can't kill him, because he's on the endangered species list..................................wait
Hadvar: Another refugee? Gods have really abandoned your people than
Me: But I was just heading to market for some bread.....
Get out of here, Greyskin!
Lol
😂
Qari Anderson "Your kind". What do you mean your kind?
#darkelflivesmatter
You gotta love how the captain says you still must die after Hadvar brings up the fact you are a high elf and POSSIBLY part of the Thalmor and killing you could start a wa
Nobody said the Thalmor had to know about it.
@@Gamer88334 But there's like 5 Thalmor watching...
@@80krauser Nobody said they couldn’t be silenced. Or that they didn’t already assume you’re a traitor the moment they saw you.
@UCxB-jz_Raex8ZBct_uvXXyA Silencing Elenwen might be a bad idea. This got cut but Elenwen and Tullius were supposed to have an animated discussion where she demand Ulfric be delivered to the Thalmor and Tullius telling her to fuck off.
@@Gamer88334 either way, it’s still a ballsy move
Hadvar: you're a long way from the Imperial City, what are you doing in Skyrim?
Dragonborn: Well actually, I'm one of your soldiers and I was held prisoner by the Stormcloaks
Captain: FORGET THE LIST, HE GOES TO THE BLOCK
Captain is defiantly a dick
Its obvious
The Captain and Dragonborn were bitter rivals, she finally has the upper hand!
Or she's a Stormcloak spy. Her machinations lay undetected for years. For she is a master of deception.
I love the Skyrim community.
@@Sithkittye I'm glad all of us can be the best of chums and nothing will ever change that
@@drakekeith7964
She can't be. She's female. That's how it works, right?
"I'm not sure why I'm even standing in this line, Captain...."
"Captain, what should I do? I'm not on the list."
"Forget the list! You go to the block."
"By your orders, Captain."
"I'm sorry, me. I'll be sure to greet myself in Sovngarde."
Phoenixm00n underrated comment
This one got me laughing lmao. This needs to be on top for people to see.
LOL 😂
lol😂
Ah yes. I’ll just meet myself in Sovngardr. *Makes sense to me.*
Headsman? What are you doing here? You should be over by the block.
Captain he's not on the list what should we do?
Forget the list, he goes to the block.
By your orders captain.
I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are... left at the block I guess?
hahahaah funniest comment
Jonny Osborne noice
OHH YOU GOT ME
My God....That got to be the most stupid thing I want to hear in-game.
Sentences random person to death for absolutely nothing.
"Sorry 'bout that."
The main reason I would never join the imperials. Like 'You guys wanted to execute me without knowing anything, but now that I could be an asset, you suddenly want to recruit me... Yeah, I think I'll pass'
@@DrakRiku1994 See, joining the Imperials makes sense if you want stability, order and a chance to resist the Aldmeri Dominion since Stormcloaks cause rebellions and chaos, but they really should have considered for a moment the implication that you, the Dragonborn, are joining the faction that wanted you dead for literally being in the wrong place at the wrong time. They should have done something for you, like maybe an additional quest before you join them that gives you like gold and some materials for crafting or something? Idk, something to compensate you for the emotional shock that you probably had experienced thinking that you were gonna die for being at the border at the wrong time.
@@Misanthropolis Men i just join the Imperials only because Balgruuf and Elisif are cool, they wanted to kill me at the beginning, they torture people and they are very represive with the people, and they are NOT thinking about resist the Thalmor, besides, Skyrim is a Nord land, being honest it should be a Nord like Ulfric the Supreme King, you cannot blame the Stormcloaks nords for trying to protect their homeland and resist against the Altmer Dominion, btw im not saying that being racist with another races is ok, just saying that they objective is a step to fight against the real enemy
@@shaikustandalone Except the Imperials are also interested in taking out the Dominion, they just think that they first need to control all of Tamriel to get everyone on the same page, while the Stormcloaks just want to selfishly protect their own land and as a result they cause a lot of chaos and suffering by wrestling against the Imperials. In a time of war, instability, infighting and chaos are NOT things that one should have. Hard to be on the same page when your approach to the same issue is drastically different.
join the stormcloaks so we can kill more elves
Well, anyone would be intrigued by your race if they saw you stand there for half an hour constantly morphing your race and facial features into something completely different.
Hydrofyre 😂😂😂😂
That profile picture
And switching genders.
Hydrofyre hadvar has seen some shit.
The cake is a lie.
"What in *OBLIVION is that?!"
"Captain that dragon's not on the list"
"Forget the list, Alduin goes on the block"
"I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are sent into time itself"
"Todd Howard? Something here just doesn't seem to work..."
""Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list"
"Forget the list. He goes to the block"
"By your orders. Captain"
"I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to the Chess Club"
It just works
I'm laughing now, Imperials. Can you say the same?
@Famous FOREVER Send Ulfric my regards!
Who’s laughing now? Not Todd, that’s for damn sure.
Lol you referenced hia childhood 😂😂😂
The fact that hodvar tries to spare you from the execution, pointing that you are not on the list, and after he says your remains are returned to your homeland is just so nice of him, you clearly sees that he has empaty towards you.
If you side with the Legion hes also pretty genuinely happy to see you again
@@BroadwayRonMexico same as Ralof
@@neiabaraja8040 alr this is more than enough to convince me to join the stormcloaks in my current playthrough
Sucks that his captian is a bitch
Whenever he says "I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to (homeland)" Hadvar adopts a weird French accent, anyone else notice?
The s sounds become a bit slur.
He sounds drunk
voice actor drunk again
why did you mention this?? now I can't stop thinking about this
I can’t unhear it now 😭😭
The Empire: *loves their damn lists*
Also the empire: forget the list.
she’s clearly a stormcloak spy
Player: *is Imperial*
Hadvar, literally an Imperial Legionnaire: WHAT, ARE YE DOIN, IN MY SWAMP?!
I might be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that Hadvar is a Nord...
Still an Imperial Legionnaire, in any event.
@@pelinalwhitestrake3037 He is indeed a nord.
@@pelinalwhitestrake3037
What would you have done if he were an elf?
@@KurotsuchiShiShi I would have done to him as I did to the rest of his pointy eared kin.
By the Eight, a snow elf? But your race was driven underground ages ago!
Captain, what should we do, he's not on the list.
Forget the list, he goes to the block.
By your orders captain.
I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are sent back to... oh, wait... um... Skyrim, I guess...
Arin Santry hahahahah
Bobby Stinklehoffer I thought the same thing.
Arin Santry the captain probably would execute the last snow elf lol
Or If theres a mod where you could be a DWARF! Imagine Hadvar's reaction now
It's actually to forgotten vale
-Where do you come from Redgard?
-Do you come to the cloud district very often? What am I saying? Of course you don’t!
-Captain, he’s definitely on the list...
Kill nazeem, feed him to a charuas, kill the charaus and stick his remains in dragon dung.
Went back to replay skyrim. Was running up to whiterun to tell balgruuf about the dragon.. Saw Nazeem walking there with his lil swagger. went up and attacked him and a fucking execution animation played out. His. wife. was. right. there. She was right there behind him. She watched me headbutt him at the speed of light until his skull probably caved into his brain. I dont regret anything.
Daddy's Little Guard:
I’m sorry, I’ll make sure your body returns to the jarl’s backside.
Daddy's Little
I saw you do that. I hated him too and I'm glad you came to skyrim to do his head in (literally), I'm sorry I had to imprison you but it's my job. It wouldn't have happened if I didn't get guard duty, unlike my cousin that is out fighting dragons.
Forget the list. He goes free
Hadvar: By the nines! It's Talos!
Captain: What should we do? He's not on the list.
Captain: Forget the list. He goes to the block.
Hadvar: By your orders, captain. I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to the 8.
marvelous😂😂
Technically, his remains should either be returned to Atmora, or Alcaire
By the nine divine!Assault,assault!
ITS THE 9.1
*O O F*
Virgin hadvar: No, you can't kill him he's not on the list
Chad Captain: Ha Ha axe goes chop chop
I wouldn’t doubt that the captain is psychotic.
The Dragonborn: haha, axe goes WOOSH!
@@neoncircus2365 dude its a video game
@@oofeoscereal6377 Dude, doesn’t mean someone can’t be corrected for misusing a real disorder that tons of people suffer from
@@risottopose9970 but... it's a mid evil video game...
Hadvar: A draugr? You from one of the burial grounds?
Hadvar: Captain. What should we do? He's not on the list.
Captain: Forget the list. He goes to the block.
Hadvar: By your orders, Captain.
Hadvar: I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to where ever your hellish kind comes from.
Draugr: VOLLK ISSH KAA
Everyone:AAAHHHH GET THIS OUT!
RO DA!
Sounds legit to me
They were nords
UNSLAAD KROSIS
Hadvar: "I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to..."
Player: "I was born in Skyrim actually...."
Alexander Taylor lol hahahahajahagsah
so they stay right there, rotting away.
Hence the first reply about dying here in your homeland. Joke fail.
@@roguishpaladin which you only get if you're a nord. my point was that you can be another race and still be born in Skyrim. Criticism fail
rach riane
Yeah, my Khajiit is from Cyrodiil (grew up with the Brotherhood). Sending him anywhere else would be weird.
Imagine how controversial this would be in the real world.
"I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to Africa."
Formidable Foe exactly what I was thinking
Formidable Foe
goes to show how retardedly, overly "offended" people make themselves to be
...especially when it was meant as a respectable thing back in the day
SlyBiffrons it still would be
Hadvar: "I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains return to Africa."
Black guy: "Bruh, I'm from Minnesota..."
Emrys Wledig is that a county in Africa
Meanwhile, a Stormcloak soldier is running out of patience, then shouts “For the love of Talos, pick a race, shut up and let’s get this over with!”
Evacuate the city, engage all defences, and get this comment 1k likes
@@daigonmocs0785 haha thanks
"My developer are smiling at me player, can you say the same ?"
Hadvar: "Ah Hadvar, you really are stupid aren't you?"
Hadvar: "Captain, what should we do with me? I'm not on the list."
Captain: "Forget the list, you go to the block."
Hadvar: "By your order Captain. I'm sorry Hadvar, I will make sure my ashes be returned to Riverwood... Somehow..."
Friendly Engineer lol
Friendly Engineer Hadvar: “ah Hadvar, you’re really stupid aren’t I”
Hadvar: “captain what should we do I’m not on the list”
Captain: “forget the list... he...you? Go to the block”
Hadvar: “I’m sorry me but Youll make sure my remains are returned to riverwood”
A dremora? How did you end up in our World??
Captain. what should we do? he's not on the list.
forget the list. He goes to the block.
By your orders, captain.
I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to Oblivion. Somehow...
Did you just assume my mortality? Just because you fleshy things die doesn't mean everything else is.
My animus will return to Oblivion without your help, thank you very much.
That's how the Oblivion Crisis should have started, haha!
Ironmaidenportugal what About an Snow Elf ;-;
"Hadvar asks the dremora to follow him, so they may escape helgen after the attack."
Hadvar: over here, follow me, prisoner
Dremora: i will feast...on your flesh!
"dremora stabs Hadvar"
yeah..that's probably how that would end XD.
When dremora die in Nirn they still live in oblivion
“Block, what should we do? He’s not on the Captain?”
“Forget the Captain, he goes to the prisoner”
“By your orders, block”
“I’m sorry, we’ll make sure your homeland is returned to your remains.”
“Follow the block, list.”
i wish i could reblog comments
This is highly underated
Dude high on skooma it seems
So this is what a brain stroke feels like.
Hahah! Underrated, I cried a little
Hadvar: An illusion mage? Don't see many like you in skyrim.
**turns invisible**
Hadvar: hmm, guess it was just my imagination.
_must've been the wind_
@@Joel-tv7jw must've been storm call.
Must've ran off
All cleared out I guess
Yes, the illusion mages are really hard to see.
"We'll make sure your remains re returned to Morrowind."
Yeah, cremate the Dark Elf and return the remains to Morrowind, the ashes won't be out of place.
Vvanderfel is in ash, morrowind is clear. P.s sorry for my english, im from russia.
@@Eugeniedefranval45 Russian characters look sweet
@@Eugeniedefranval45 Ever since the eruption of Dagoth Ur all of Morrowind has been in ash. Hell, even Solstheim was ashy at the time of skyrim.
o u c h
@@redbulljones not all of morrowind. It's likely Vvardenfell and a lot of the nearby coastline like Ebonheart, Firewatch and Davons Watch are devestated (Not only by Baar Dau crashing into Vivec City).
Solstheim is much closer to the red mountain than say Narsis.
Captain : Forget the list, he goes to the block.
Me : *command kill*
Forget the list, everybody to the Block!
Jason Lx By your orders, Captain.
Hadvar: An avocado? Captain what should we do, he's not on the list!
Captain: forget the list, he goes to the guac!
"You a sellsword? A sailor from Stros M'kai?"
Redguard: "I'm a fuckin florist, you piece of shit"
lol
Trey Pehl hahahahahahaha
Roses are white,
Violets are red,
I was sent to the block
and lost my head
Redguard: "I'm a member of the Minutemen, there's a settlement that needs your help."
Trey Pehl "you from one of the strongholds orc"
"Nope. Morthal. Just a really shitty bard"
-The List! What are you doing here? You should be in my hands;
Captain, What should we do?
He's a list!
-Forget the list, he goes to the block.
-By your orders captain.
-I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains will be used to make a good toilet paper.
-Line up to extinction.
List: did you just assume my gender?
This comment philosophically works on multiple levels
This comment made my day :D
H: Captain! What are you doing here?
Captain, what should we do?
C: Forget the list, I go to the block.
H: By your orders Captain.
I'm sorry, we'll make sure... wait... what?
I laughed way to much about this
Hadvar: "You from one of the strongholds, Orc? How did you end up here?"
Urag gro-Shub: "I am a librarian at the College of Winterhold!"
Hadvar: "Captain, what should we do, he's not on the list."
Urag gro-Shub: "Please make sure your hands are clean before touching that list."
Hadvar: "What?"
Urag gro-Shub: "I don't want to see you treating that list poorly. Are we clear?"
Hadvar: "Uhh..."
Urag gro-Shub: "I would be honored. Beyond honored to have such a list here at the College."
Hadvar: *looks at list* "I'm sorry. I'll make sure you're sent to the Arcaneum."
You can make a good parodies :D
Thats acutally hilarious
Yep!! 🤣🤣🤣
Lol good one
Thats really funny
Race: Elder Scrolls V Skyrim
"Another Re-Release? Todd really has Forsaken your Franchise"
"Captain, what should we do? He isn't on the list."
"Forget the list. He goes to the block."
"I'm sorry. We'll make sure your remains are returned to Todd Howerd
"
the only rerelease ive bought is on the switch so i could play skyrim on the go (i also wanted the zelda stuff lol)
@@Scringus I started playing it on the Switch, its the only version i own, its also the only game besides Dark Souls Remastered i’ve put over 70 hours into
@@mightyarbokking7197 i've got it on ps3 with no updates or dlc lol
The prophet
The captain should be named Oprah. you go to the block. you go to the block. everybody goes to the block
Mark Ortiz XD
More like a Karen
Oprah The Terrible
LMFAOOAOAOAOAAO
Hadvar sure likes to focus on stereotypes.
Glowaru you do know stereotypes exist for a reason right? They're the typical traits you run into like white people being rich or black people leaping like frogs, or Jews being extortionists, though my favorite is how brown people like me are typically the help
Just Imperial profiling... isn't it kind of him though, to assure you that your remains will be sent to the nation your race is most common, regardless of where you may actually be from.
... seems a lot like something the thalmor did with the Blades, so kind of them xD
Thorus Zwolf They just might toss your remains in a pile labeled "trash".
Alex DuRain Except non of those are typical traits of any of those races, except the black one
Glowaru Cuz he's a Nord
Hadvar: "Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list."
Captain: * whispers * It's my time to shine...
@Han Lockhart
I'm glad people are just looking at a character in one dimension really makes you think.
Captain: "fOrGEt ThE LiST hE GoES tO ThE bLOcK!"
That Captain is why I sided with the Stormcloaks.
feel like the captain is secretly a psychopath who just enjoys watching people get executed and that's why she just puts everyone on the block.
For the love of Talos shut up and let's get this over with!!
Woah Man Come on, I havent got all morning
*SLAM*
As fearless in death as he was in life
i'm still alive
Death TO THE STORM CLOAKS
+Agent Xbox Skyrim belong to the nords, Long live High King Ulfric!!
The Captain hates all races equally
*TASK FAILED SUCCESSFULLY*
She is racist now
The Gucci Banana “wowee” ,is this an agent of autism cat
“Captain his knee isn’t on the block”
*Forget the traveler, he gets an arrow*
“I’m sorry friend at least you’ll be a guard”
Underrated comment!
Tt
Over 👏used👏meme👏
Yurr Ye I just had a stroke reading this
"We'll make sure your remains are returned to Morrowind."
"DUDE NO I'M FROM SOLITUDE!"
*Playing as a khajiit spellsword who was born and raised in Skyrim, as well as all the the other descendants of her great-great-grandmother*
_We'll make sure your remains are returned to Elsweyr_
N'wah wtf?
*playing as my Nerevarine, my hero of Kvatch, and literally every single protagonist who is a Redguard born in Morrowind*
- We'll return your remains to Hammerfell
@@5H4NKTH35HARK great great grandfather reminded me of m'aiq the liar
The block?? By the gods how did you get here
Captain what should we do its not on the list
For get the list it goes to the block
We will make sure your remains are placed where the block goes.
nani?
uno reverse card XD
and thus ended the tetris crossover event.
“Oh yeah... now that you mention it, you do look like a cat.”
Hadvar: by the gods a Dragon I thought you were stories
What should we do captain he is not on the list
Captain: forget the list he goes to the block
Hadvar: we will make sure your remains are uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh............ used to craft armour
Dragon : how did you even catch me?
Dante devil Alduin: I came back for my warrior.
Dragon: yol thoor shul!
*burns captain*
Dragon: 'sup Alduin thuri
Kio Phoenix ye
"Oh, Dragon, so you're finally. Awake? You must have flown into that imperial ambush, same as us and that horse thief over there"
Rougamaru full of skooma*
Picturing a dragon just standing in line with a bunch of humans curiously asking "how did you even catch me?" made me laugh the hardest I've laughed this month. Well done, take this upvote.
"I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are returned to Morrowind"
"Please don't"
My ancestors are smiling down on me imperials CAN YOU SAY THE SAME
"Forget your ancesters, they're going to the block!"
I'm sorry, we'll make sure your ancestors will return to.. Sovngard?
+Mollendokter boer The headless man???? What on earth-
Caption what should we do he is not on the list
Forget the list he goes to the block
by your orders caption, just how do we decapitate a headless man?
The captain: Probably the reason why 90% of players pick the stormcloaks
Charcoals 3 - I picked the "Fuck All Your Factions" faction since the start.
someone watched seanzoz
John Darkling - Yeah, & that's why I loved it because it was pretty much the truth.
Well, 90% of Stormcloak players at any rate.
Ulfric's an egocentric little Thalmor puppet. For the Emperor.
Well, there were 3 reasons that made me a Stormcloak.
1- This bitch captain
2- Ralof is a good bro
3- Ulfric's talk with Galmar at The Palace of Kings (that gave me chills)
Bro this man's dedication he would have had to have gone through the opening cutseen for everyone of these. Not all hero's wear capes
There is actually a save spot before the character creation, so all he'd have to do is start right before "who are you" from Hadvar, then select a random preset and listen to Hadvar's reply. A hero, yes, but more the way we use "hero" now, which is to describe using slightly more effort than being asleep.
Hadvar: A dwarf!? But the legends say that you all died thousands of years ago!
Captain, what should we do? He’s not on the list.
Captain: Forget the list, he goes to the block.
Hadvar: by your orders, captain. I’m sorry, I’ll make sure your remains are returned to...wait...you must be the last of your kind! We can’t do thi-
Captain: I said, he goes to the block!
A dwarven Dragonborn. Damn
Now that be a interesting challenge. We got dwarf fortress in skyrim boys.
[Obligatory Gimli joke]
Ya know there is one mod for that But i dont know how Hadvar would react to custom races
@@DariusGOLaru he saying nothing (I tried dwemer)
Hadvar: ?????? TORYGG? YOU'RE NOT DEAD? BY THE GODS! Capitan, there is no reason for war, Torygg isn't dead, and not even on the list, what should we do?
Capitan: Forget the list, he goes to the block.
Hadvar: B-but he's the High King of Skyrim...
Alex 5432 I said forget the fucking list he goes to the block or I replace him with you
*ulfric breaks his bindings
ulfric: ILL KILL U AGAIN
*MURDERS THE HIGH KING
*STARS THE GREAT WAR
Rango pistacho
That's not what started the great war...
Haha
I'm sorry, we'll make sure Jarl Elisif collects your remains..
"Empire loves their damn lists"
"Forget the list he/she goes to the block"
Captain's fiance at their wedding:
"Honey, i think the guy near the champagne is your great uncle Julius, but i don't see him on the guests list"
Captain: "forget the list, he goes to the block"
😂
"You with the trade caravans, Khajiit? Your kind always seems to find trouble." I take it he's not a cat person, then. xD
Cats are, how do i put this gently? A bag of cunts? They suck. The only redemptive quality they have is that they poop and shit in a box, that then needs to be cleaned and smells horrid.
Should have said that to the redguard
The former however, is a cat person
iona2225 rather have a small dried poop in a box which can be picked up with a scooper than having to pick up a warm wet dog poop off the street with a bag over my hand
Essex plus there are such stuff as those things that make the litterbox's sand smell nice
Hadvar: I've never seen a Dragon before what realm did you fly from?
Captain, what should we do? He's not on the list
Captain: forget the list, he goes to the block
Hadver: by your orders captain, I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are send to oblivion
Dragon: IM FUCKING ALDUIN YOU IGNORANT MILKDRINKER
Yoran Rock I've never heard "ignorant milkdrinker" and im glad I have now
By Shor a Dwemer! I thought your kind was extinct!
Captain, what should we do? His name isn't on the list.
Forget the list, he goes to the block.
By your orders captain.
I'm sorry, we'll make sure your remains are uhhhh.... evaporated? Line up to extinction.
to be more technical dwemer might not be extinct they just simply disappeared
Lol
Lol i love this. We'll make sure your remains are returned to uh...Moonshadow? Damn, lucky
Skull Bulldozer Yes but your average Nord doesn't know what happened in the heart chamber, only that there were Dwemer and not there isn't.
We'll make sure your remains are... kept well away from the College of Winterhold
"Forget the list, he goes to the block."
*_"BYOORDERS,_* captain"
"Im swowy"