Autism - How My Unstoppable Mother Proved the Experts Wrong: Chris Varney at TEDxMelbourne
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- Опубликовано: 15 июн 2013
- Chris Varney is an advocate for children's rights. His advocacy began as a 16-year-old Youth Ambassador for World Vision during which he became active in anti-poverty campaigning. He went on to become National Co-Director of World Vision's youth movement and later, the 2009 Australian Youth Representative to the United Nations. As Youth Representative he put together a book Dear Kevin which helped catalyse many practical outcomes for vulnerable children and youth. For his efforts he has received the 2011 Monash University Student Alumni Award, the 2012 National Award for Youth in Advancing the Legal Rights and Interests of Children and Young People and the 2012 Future Justice Medal.
Visit Chris' website: chrisrvarney.com/
Connect with Chris on Twitter: / chrisrvarney
Join I CAN Network / theicannetwork
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I'm 44 years old, and I was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum just a few months ago. When I was a kid, my mom was told by an "expert" that I wouldn't be able to attend college or live independently. Thankfully, Mom didn't listen, and thanks to her encouragement, I was the first person in my family to graduate from college, and I've been living on my own for many years now.
Wow! Very inspiring :)
Great work defying the experts who never knew what you were capable of.
This is truely inspiring . i was sad and lost trying to be strong until i saw this video
♥️
Wow I an 44 and was diagnosed this year. This was after years of different diagnosis: anxiety, depression, O. C. D and ADHD.
Nice...hugely encouraged
Thank you for this. My worst fear is to leave my autistic child alone in this world. He’s 3 and I pray everyday that he can live on his own, work and just cope with life. You give us hope
This same worry plagues me 24/7 my daughter 6 autistic and when I'm gone she alone I fear she will be abused in a state home until her death.
Get in his world. Teach him how to learn from the world around us. If go to a differecountry and try to go from point A to point B how would you do it? How would you learn to do so? Simple task need explanation, extensive , over and over and is ok. We also need some in some areas as well. Figure out how he learns and from that point explore the world and life from a new set of eyes and a new perspective. It would give him confidence in himself to do and excell in things he likes and interest him. Also, make sure his nutrion is taken care of. Many doctors already have clinical trials proven the importance of gut health. Make sure his vitamins are to it optimal levels. There is a documentary on Netflix that talks about the correlation of iron and B vitamins deficiency of the mother during pregnancy and the babys developmental stages, and how it transgress to babys health once out the womb. Constant stimuli cognitive without assiting phisicaly but mostly by oral directioning. And a collective input of all this by family and care givers. Therapy should be continued everyday all day by you and care givers in order to see improvement. And see how long it takes him to process learning. Some kids can be 2 weeks, 3 months etc, so you’ll know what to move on next and when.
Personally, what my autism diagnosis means to me, isn't "there are things I can't do", it's more like "there are things I need to do differently, in my own way" or "there are things I'm going to need help with"
Exactly, I also have asbergers and my parents always made sure that I got the services i needed (However proving that I really was disabled and that I really did more help with daily living skills then it seemed like I did usually tended to be a real “pain in the biscuits” as they say) but at the same time,they encouraged me to do as much as I could do for myself.
That's a great way to put it!
@Pateck Aaron what's the name of the herb?
Yes ,differently,no point of trying to fit in.
This is so true. Even some of the things you'll need help with, in time, you'll find ways to get that done too💕 Never give up.
I was diagnosed with autism at the age of three. I was told I would never be in a public school or walk or talk properly. That day, my mom set me up with three therapists a day. After all this, I graduated from a mainstream school, I walk, talk, and I can do near anything. I am quite an inspiration to others on my autism. You'd never guess I was on the spectrum.
My son is 3 and was diagnosed thanks for giving me hope.
+Kristian Stoddard
Kristian, You and your mother are such great models of inspiration for me. My son is 3 1/2 and diagnosed recently on ASD. I have started the procedure for ABA therapy. The stories like yours give me hope.
+Roy Mathew how is ABA going for you guys? My son started a month ago and it's going slow
+Caden's Journey We haven't started it yet. Just got the diagnosis and started paperwork with an ABA provider. It may take at least 2 months before we start. 1 month is very less. Its a slow process and you have to give it few months to show the improvement.
Tav Tav what's DSM4
My son has autism and successfully beat many obstacles. Mothers do have to work tirelessly in the background. If people only knew how the mothers are treated. It takes resilience and focus.
I come here every time I feel worried about my kid.
me too i blame my self a lot
I was told that there’s something mentally wrong with my son and that he won’t be able to go to a regular class room. He is in 7th grade a straight A student. Please don’t listen to people that don’t know and understand you always push for more. Good bless.
Thanks for sharing dear 🥰
I need some words of courage. I am trying get my son tested and I need to wait over a year and he is 4.
I need help my son.
He is probably in the boardline autism.
I feel so guilty. What I don't did pregnant to make my son have autism?
I need some help.
@@DebbieMcleod448 I am not sure where you are from but I would suggest you to reach out to a developmental paediatrician. They are fully qualified to do an assessment especially if you are waiting for assessment from public hospitals. In any case it’s not as bad as it sounds or being projected. Wish you good luck.
Well said. I believe moms are the best expert just need little extra support from honest, kind, caring professionals.
@@DebbieMcleod448 am feeling same like you I have a boy as well...be sttong
I was born 15 ounces, yes ounces, the doctors said I would never live and if I did I would never be able to do anything. But look at me now, commenting on RUclips lol.
❤🙏
Good bless you 👍
God is Good! He has the final say!!!
I'm glad, thanks for sharing. Reminded me of Sir Isaac Newton.
Good bless you
Behind every successful story there is one thing common- a dedicated mother..gives me immense hope my son has mild autism he is 3 and half year old..
@@AbdulRahman-lv5pjthank you so much for saying it. I am a mom and I have to be the one who takes care of my autistic son. I will be strong for him.❤
As an autistic parent and individual my advice to others is this: don't settle, don't be complacent, don't doubt your ability to parent AND be the best advocate for your child. I've had teachers, doctors and all kinds of professionals try to gaslight me about my own child and what works best for him...don't let them push you around. It's the hardest grind in the world to be a parent of an autistic child but it's the most special one too. Hang in there.
Thank you for this
I am a father with a son with autism and you have given me so much hope, thanks Chris Varney...... I salute you Sir.
Louis Salguero how is your son doing now Louis?
This was so touching and beautiful I was moved to tears. My son's been diagnosed with level 3 autism last year. He also has speech delay. I was devastated but I immediately worked on getting him to therapy, did lots of research and follow and encourage his interests. I talked to him a lot in simple words until he one day said some. 15 months later, he's now talking in sentences, they're mostly ready made sentences he heard but he applies them in the right context. He sings a lot too. In both English and Italian, and when he can't say the words, he'd look at me expecting me to say them. And when I do, he'd hang to every syllable and he'd say them after me. Those moments just melts my heart. I have hope he'll become fluent one day. He's bright and sweet and I believe he'll be the best in what he'll be.
My son is 2 years 5months and for now he is non verbal how old was your child when started talking?
@@evelinquinteros1326 Hi, he was 3 and a half. I read boys tend to develop later than girls. Just talk to him a lot. I still tell him every word that comes in front of him my older daughter says I sound like an instruction manual or an advertisement.😂😂😂. Simple words. Don't worry, he'll get there!
@@jrodayeoh My son is 3 and 10 months, he can sing nursery rhymes, says all Alphabets and phonics, numbers upto 20, says colours and shapes by heart but just can not communicate. I'm so confused.
You're a great mom. Never give up hope! You are doing everything right and although it sometimes seems impossible and feels so hard now, you are planting and nurturing the seeds so that you will see the fruits of your labor grow and bloom over time. Your son will bloom. And you will see all your hard work and love pay off in dividends as he gets older and overcomes one obstacle after another. A mother's love can move heaven and earth for her children. ❤️
@@estherbuluma3306 My exact case at 4 years 3 months. He began singing maybe at 2... Very good with musical tunes! He shocked me months ago when I noticed he types "cocomelon", "happy birthday" whenever he wants to search using my phone, he writes "Jesus" almost every time he has pen and paper. He writes B.I.N.G.O. and ensures it's 3 times as in the song, then goes to the next line omitting the first letter, as is in the song (replacing the missing letter(s) with a bold dot!!! One day he read in my chats, "Wow". Then he also wrote Question Mark (?) pointed at it, then said "Mom, what?" Meaning he knows how the mark is used: behind questions like "what?" By this time he was only half year into Playgroup/ nursery, where the most they learn is numbers and alphabets. Not even three-letter words yet, always introduced a year or two later.
When he gets into a public bus, or while in Church, he'll be tapping every neighbor and greeting them with the widest of smiles, "Hi, how are you?" But he'll do this repeatedly. He mostly does preconstructed sentences. If he wants to eat and there's what he's mastered a cartoon character to say when they want to eat, he'll use that, whether it's a song or words. Like when you give him banana, or when he sees you with one, he'd begin to sing "I want to eat, eat, eat, apples and bananas..." At times he'll also say with broken words, mixing English and Swahili, to ask for the same. He hugs, kisses and smiles alot, keeps eye contact, can be very playful and interactive, but also loves to play alone, mostly indoors. He's however not very conscious of his environment; not completely non-responsive to danger but I'd compare his level of the same to a 2 year-old's. At school he demands food from other kids' tins, a gesture translated to mean he doesn't care about other's feelings or desires. I couldn't potty train him. I tried and gave up. But between 3-4 he started using the toilet, and he's good with it right now, except on cases when he's in a new environment and hasn't been shown the washrooms; then he'd mess on his clothes. He may be sweating but won't allow you to take off his sweater. Moments later, he'll be struggling to remove it by himself, crying for help. I took this to mean he wants it done only when he wants it done. Also, whether you wrong him or he wrongs you, he'll be the first to say sorry, and will keep repeating it until you too say sorry. He feeds on his own, but gets poorer at it around Mummy.
I always believed that he's just okay but with delayed milestones, until his new school introduced the autism thing after interacting with him for two days. I'm just confused and overwhelmed by the thought of it.
wow he touched me his story is touching. I cried all through the video. I will not let the doctor label my son. he's gifted and smart, my son was born 12/12/12. thank you Chris for giving my son confidence
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Wow! I wasn't going to comment until I saw 12/12/12. My daughter was also born on 12/12/12 and she is Autistic. God bless to you and your son.
Hello! My 5 year old son was just diagnosed with autism. And I must say, I'm glad he is diagnosed. Because now I know how to help him, and how to let others know how they can help him and be understanding of his differences. This label doesn't have to change anything, other than give us direction on how to be there for our children. It sounds like your an awesome mother! keep up the good work, and you're not alone :)
jensine onuwa my son was born on 10/11/12 he is also on high functioning autism.... he is very smart and showing great development and improvement
@@dancing523 kq
This clearly shows how society's behavior could affect our condition in both the ways. Hats off to your mother, grandparents, friends and teacher for always being by your side.
My son was diagnosed at 3-4 years of age. I also had him in many and various therapies for some years. It did work... however the key I believe was sending him to a Montessori School. Their “I can” method is remarkable. Remembering of course that Montessori developed her whole philosophy on children’s education with kids who were seen as disabled in one form or another, in the early 1900’s My son has recently graduated with a university degree and as importantly is seen as a leader amongst his peers. It’s true the therapies helped enormously. However it was encouraging his faith in his own wholeness, however different that was to everyone else that was significant.
what therapies did you do? Did your son speak at 3-4 years of age when you diagnosed him? Thanks for input on montessori. Also what was his diagnosis if you don't mind?
It hurt me so much when my son was diagnosed with ASD and labeled as ‘disabled’ or ‘disordered’. I always saw him as someone pretty unique in the way he perceives and interacts with the outside world, he’s one of the most empathic people I’ve ever met, he’s so kind and full of emotion, and does take him quite a. It if effort to try new and scary things but once he knows he can do it he does everything without a hitch, he’s such a good hands-on learner! I refuse to believe there’s anything wrong with him at all, he’s just different from most other people, and I love who he is. The doctor who diagnosed him told us he can’t guarantee he’ll be able to live an independent life and we need to force him i to social settings, like team sports, etc. I was stunned at this - my son was 4 years old and spoke understand 3 languages, yet went through the assessment in his non-primary language and was diagnosed with speech delay! When it comes to team sports, I know he struggles with it so much, yet with individualistic sports he absolutely thrives, so why would I need to force him into something he simply doesn’t like to
do??! Just to make him look ‘normal’?!
It's nice to know that there are good mothers out there. Most just jump at the opportunity to delegate responsibility and treat their child like a freak, which is why your average psych office quickly turns into a parent guilt laundromat when parents are viewed as the client instead of the actual child.
@@gessieMost mothers ? I have an autistic son and know many other mothers with children on the spectrum, I don't know any who treat their child like a freak and delegate responsibility. All the moms I know work really hard to advocate for their children, encourage their strengths and interests and have access to therapies that are safe and beneficial.
@@joanna0988 Then it seems you're in a fortunate social environment. The guilt laundromat I mention is especially common among the poor, even in modern countries - in their case "most" is absolutely accurate. Then again, abuse in general is extremely common among the poor - not because they're poor but because of a regressive subculture.
@@gessie That's fair, I live in Canada and we have good services and support.
You remind me of my 5 year old son and I feel like I can feel everything your mother went through.. luckily his father and I see past the diagnosis and we also see the incredible gifts he has, socially he struggles, but he can learn a world map / countries / foreign alphabets and pick up very complex math like nobody’s business.. thank you so much for your story
Are you a bot?
@@NanaWilson-px9ij no?
Absolutely bloody spot on !!!!! Exactly how I was feeling and you just verbalised every single thing i have been thinking . My 3 year old son will def be an " I can " child . A mother knows !!! A mother knows !!:)
So ... your child is about 8yo as I'm reading this. I pray you are still encouraged and all is well and y'all are excelling celebrating every victory both great and small💕
one of the first people I heard say a wonderful quote as a child was actually a Pastor who stated "your disability in not an excuse for not doing things but a reason to find a different way to achieve these." I thank Bishop Ed Little who also teamed up with my parents to fight for me in the education system. We had something as an expanded plan that picked up on components from the school IEP in a so called Individual Social Development Plan that he presented to my Sunday school class teacher who also happened to be a special education teacher.
That is inspirational. What age did you get potty trained?
Great to see some positive things said about Autism! When you have a young child with Autism It is impossible to imagine that they will ever function without help. You all suffer so much. There is no practical help out there just sympathy. I just want to say that it does eventually get better. It does get easier. My son is 12 years old and absolutely amazing. He is much nicer and smarter than most neurotypical kids. Schools need to do more about bullying.
Not just autistic (autism + me) people who needs help, non-autistics also can need help.
Neurotypical kids aren't born mean. It's the bigoted, small-minded grown-ups in their lives (parents, teachers and authority figures) who teach them how to be ("You've got to be taught to hate and to fear").
I think recovery really lies in a mother who dances to the beat of a Different Drum because the ones that March to the drum beat of the doctors ruin their children.
It is good to have balance. Some parents believe too much in doctors and some not enough.
When I was almost two years old, I was diagnosed with severe autism, severe mental retardation, and speech delay. The neurologist told my mom that I would never graduate high school, never go to college, and never live a normal life. I started talking at 3 years old and had speech therapy until I was 14. I always knew that I was different but I didn't really know about it until I was 13. On the bright side, I had a psychological evaluation when I was 19 and I was diagnosed with PDD-NOS. I'd like to think that music helped me embrace it and feel comfortable talking about it. :)
+NawiExtra Thank you and it has gotten better because in the last two years I have become more comfortable talking about it :)
+NawiExtra Of course but then again, I have also had people who I've told about it say " But you don't look like the type" and treat me the same as they did before they found out.
Kiara you are an inspiration to me. my two year old is being assessed for autism tomorrow. i am in a whirlwind of emotions.
I have mild autism but I said my first word when I was a late 1 year old to an early 2 year old and have no problems with my speech apart from stuttering when I say something in the wrong order ]and starting what I was going to say all over again. (but that happens quite a lot and I had to make 7 edits to this paragraph of writing)
my sister was diagnosed with severe autism and mental retardation too. She's 2 years younger than me and has led to my life being better in a way. When i was around 8 my parents gave her all the attention due to her condition so i learned most things with my grandfather, a former engineer and extremly smart though ruthless man. He taught me physics and biology (his hobby) He taught me Swedish, English and semi-fluent german. I became his greatest achievment as i aced tests and got in to the Naturvetenskapsprogrammet (math and biology) when i graduated i got accepted to the Uppsala university doctor program over 900KM away from him and my grandmother...so he learned to use skype. My sister was sent to the introduktionsprogrammet, a program for the people with lacking grades to even go join a regular secondary school. Really makes me glad she exsists...in a way...even though a whole heartetly hate her, hate the very idea i share 50% of my genetic code with her. But i have another sister who's pretty good at soccer so i guess that makes up for it
I fought the experts after being told it was my fault my son was the way he is. Eventually he got the diagnosis he deserved and was diagnosed with 6 separate conditions. Never stop fighting for your kids.
💗💗💗
I’m crying. Thank you so much for this video. I’m borderline ASD & my daughter has mild autism. I am just like your Mom. There’s nothing that my daughter cannot do & I refuse to let others tell her otherwise.
Thank you been looking for mothers who refuse negativity because of what seems like a disability in their children
I need some words of courage. I am trying get my son tested and I need to wait over a year and he is 4.
I need help my son.
He is probably in the boardline autism.
I feel so guilty. What I don't did pregnant to make my son have autism?
I need some help.
Theres nothing wrong with Your son, he has a gift. The help will come ..don’t give up. but in the mean time cherish your son be a strong, encouraging mother to your son. Surrender the stigma that comes with being autistic. What I learn is that our children came here to teach us something special about ourselves. In order to see that we have to shift our beliefs.
"It’s a cruel world. And yet…so beautiful…", this is the quote that comes to my mind watching this, thankyou for this, thankyou a lot.
That's the same quote found in ATTACK ON TITAN LOL.
@@strongindependentblackwoma1887 YES it is xD
This certainly one of the most beautiful stories I’ve ever listened to. So touching
I cried towards the end. This was such a moving story. Thank you Chris. I wish more teachers and parents would help educate and encourage their kids to become loyal friends and understand these individuals because as Chris said they can do anything they just orbit a little differently.
That was a heart warming message for all parents. You hold so much of authority in the life of your child. Building them into beautiful human beings like Chris.
This is beautiful! My three year old was diagnosed with ASD back in Aug 2022 and I was terrified at first. I felt like a failure and as if it's my fault. I feel as if they teach us to be afraid of the ASD instead of teaching us acceptance. Now, I'm working on how to be a better person and help my child grow.
Too often my own teenagers ( ASD ) say " I'm stupid" "I'm a failure" after they had done something considered "wrong" I tell them you are clever try again. Recently my teenage son stood up to a bully and told that student to stop and then physically he was pulled to the floor in the classroom.(that student since suspended from school). Later that day he reported to me he had felt discriminated for : talking differently, thinking differently, not being sporty, having different culture background and being autistic. I told him he is still a special person to me and their a lot of things he can do.
James Smith ruclips.net/video/NysoBYcyZBg/видео.html
+James Smith God bless you both
Got a brave son.
You are an awesome parent! I hope you and your son are doing well!
Absolutely beautiful talk. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. As a mother of an unusual kiddo, I needed this.
That was a beautiful but emotional story! Thank you 🙏 you are very lucky to have had the support and wonderful mother! The sky is the limit with the right support and I wish more people believed in this approach! Watching this has giving me hope for my own children.
Thank you for sharing your story - had me in tears and just what i needed to hear in light of an upcoming diagnosis for my 4 year old. Inspires me to be like your mum for my little one. Cheers to your mum and you for your advocacy for those on the spectrum.
2:30 YES! Loved that unveiling moment, I genuinely started cheering!
Mr Varney ... Your way with words is wonderful and I love your 'I can' message! It is one I have and will continue to pass onto my children regardless if they be autistic or neuro typical :) I will even use it for myself when I believe I am a bad mum when faced in those situations you and your mother have gone through ... Thank you for being you and a beacon of light! I hope to hear from you and will be a happy listener to your stories and talks. The very best to you always and many thanks x
You made me cry! Thank you for being so honest
Thank you for giving me the confidence to deal with my grandson. You won't know how much this has helped me, many many thanks xxx
When he said Lisa was his mother and he was the child i burst into tears. I just recently was told my son is Autistic and is non verbal this gives me hope that he could learn to speak one day.
Contact the lady on Marcia Hines previous mess for assistance.
Always talk to your child and give them more time to respond!
Even using sign language, Assisted technology that will speak for them or with pictures… they can & will learn will practice!
Do not give up. They need more practice and different ways of teaching. Focus on what he is interested in.
I have aspergers, I really appreciated what he said. I just do things in a different way than others. I wish I had the family or the support he had from peers. Most of what I got out of high school was more anxiety. I really want to move past this road block and succeed in the ways I use to dream of.
+Tyler H (Helicopterpilot16) no you don't think in a different way than others. just your family thinks in another way than god thinks.. and therfor you managed to avoid checking out other peoples pre-knowledge, because you are used to get twisted around your own knowledge... and people can see you are used to that.. so they always control your mind and your values and morals because they "can" .. you allow it... you don'T stand up for gods truth.. you are afraid of listening to other peoples opinion and react like god would react: correct their errors and give them a better way of thinking that makes them more free and more loving and less emotional addictive... because the truth will set you free! just trust in god and the pover of universal absout truth that helps everybody no matter how hard it feels to accept the truth!
+Tyler H (Helicopterpilot16) sorry i totaly read you wrong... you wrote "i just do things in a different way" but i read "i just think in a different way than others" .... but maybe it's helpfull anyhow.. maybe you can benefit from my "mistake" ... becaue you only do things different, because you think different.. because you feel different... because you think other people feel more real than you.. but in many cases you feel much more real than usual people, am i right? ... but you don't confront them, because you are labeled as "odd"
+Tyler H (Helicopterpilot16) You will succeed Tyler, my son is 19, in college, has a few friends, and is finally somewhat happy He hated both primary school and high school b/c of his aspergers, and now he's with more mature peers who find him interesting rather than weird. Hang in there.
I have AS too and I had the "Loving Push" when I was in my 20's. Because of it I have an associate's in psychology along with learning that I am good as math. This was after encountering 10 years of misconceptions and being pigeonholed.
Hello World: with Miyah Good luck to you my dear, you are an absolutely beautiful young lady, and if you have AS that just goes without saying that you are FAR MORE INTELLIGENT and interesting than your female peers.... you will meet someone that will cherish your uniqueness and live happily ever after, and you deserve it. You will make the world a better place! God bless you.
This is such a touching and inspirational story. Thank you for sharing. I'm sure your mom is so proud of you. My son has Autism and ADHD and i'm super proud of who he is. ❤
Amazing! You were so blessed to have an awesome mom & network around you. You are so gifted. I loved listening to you
This is a great clip I think. Absolutely the key is focusing in on the child or adults strengths as we should do with any person of course. Children and adults with autism, need a strong network of family and or friends who really are there to highlight the positive aspects of their unique gifts and individual outlook. It's so great to see someone who actually sits on the Autism Spectrum advocating for others who do too. I really got a lot out of this clip.
This made me cry so much. Beautiful. We are all human despite all our apparent quirks. We are all beautiful in our own special ways.
Amen Brother. Self-diagnosed and I finally get myself and the world around me at 58.
Who all are their in ur family?
Thank you for this, I'm the Mum who has been the one going "why is my child struggling". Ive had to fight for her to get help, so easy to blame her challenges on my parenting and her bad behaviour. Thank you for posting this, my girl is utterly amazing and I'll be there to help her become the wonderful person I know she will be in her future, I love her for who she is and I'm happy that she is special and I'm happy to be that unstoppable Mum for my unstoppable daughter who feels the world like others don't.
You have no idea how much this talk means to me. It moved me from fear to motivation, to hope, to movement to help and celebrate my beautiful boy. Thank you!
Your strong mother in world
Very very moving Chris . A very inspirational talk . Your mother is amazing and must be so very proud
Thanks a lot mate, I respect you and more respect for your mom. God bless you both.
What an incredible man and his family, thank you for sharing your story
Man, it brought tears to my eyes! What a groundbreaking speech!
How inspiring. It does not get better. Every parent, child and teacher should watch. This video can apply to any child with dissabilities.
Thank you for sharing.
Yes , I encouraged my daughter to bring her to talk and meet others when she was young , she is the most kind and beautiful girl in the world and I love her very much. I am proud of her and always believe in her even I was exhausted and caused lots of tears in the dark being there alone for her ..... I thank God for having her in my life 🧡
Being born on the spectrum is no different than being born without a hand or with speech issues. You work hard to overcome and find your place in this world. We all have challenges. Some more noticeable than others.
Your unstoppable mother was blessed: had much help from family!
I have nothing...
I had nobody and 2 other kids And my son also has Duchenne muscular dystrophy...he is 23 a college graduate and on a ventilator now...he begins the bachelor's program soon after cataract surgery ...hes had heart surgery back surgeries and has been w/c bound since age 9...i fought every school he attended to mainstream him ...its never been easy but we do it ...you just need resources Google go where help is ...just don't take no for an answer.. I was alone...but my son had me so I made it about not letting him feel like I did...alone
Chris, thank you for your beautiful and inspiring story. You left me in tears - of joy - and I can't thank you enough. I have done nothing but fight for my little guy, now 4.5 years old, since I became sure of his Autism diagnosis - and you gave me just what I needed to keep fighting. We still have such a long way to go in this country, the US, with respect to ensuring the life-altering services these children need. Thank you so much for being such an eloquent and gifted ambassador. You are reaching many - and so many need to hear your message!
OK, I held it together the whole time, but welled up at the very end when he went to hug his mom. :)
Fantastic story and speech that applies across the board to all children, autistic or not. It's called unconditional love, support and acceptance of someone exactly as they are! All children need it and we all still need it as adults more often than we think.
I am high functioning, I have never been tested but there is no doubt in my mind that I am. My son also is. We had a really bad night last night and I was feeling really down today. This video is wonderful. I love it when other people have the courage to tell their story. I needed it.
Hello 👋🏼 I just “diagnosed” myself a week ago after listening to an audiobook about an autistic woman and relating to her life experience too closely. Now I’m researching extensively because I have a husband and 4 kids that are very clearly neurodiverse. I have struggled immensely my whole life, and especially in my marriage and my parenting and am hoping to finally find some help. I’m 41 years old and terrified, but hopeful. Not sure how this would work, but if there’s a way, I’d love it if we could support each other. Anyhow, if nothing else, you’re not alone 🤗🤗🤗
Fantastic, you described my childhood very closely. I was marked as being a problem child with genius which inevitably landed me in a few sticky spots to say the least. I am now 40 with a child who has been identified as having autism, I will make it my lifes work to ensure that he has a much better start in life than I had. Inspiring mother to say the least and you are a credit to her. Encyclopedias rock!!
I am glad that my diagnosis did not come until I was 58. I was labelled, but the label wasn't "autistic", it was "odd ball", "weirdo", or my personal favourite "eccentric". Even the less positive labels did not bring expectations of "can do" and "can't do". Consequently, because nobody said "oh, you won't be able to do that, you're autistic", I just got on with life, supported by amazing parents who thought nothing of my quirks.
I had a successful career as a teacher. I was academically successful, achieving an excellent degree. I've been told by former pupils how inspirational I have been to them. It angers me when I hear that people are told they cannot do these things because they are autistic.
Success in life is, in part, due to making the most of your strengths. My parents encouraged me to do just that, and I have to say how grateful I am to them for that. As an autistic person, I have some amazing abilities, as have most autistic people. We are all different, we all need to follow different paths. Some, unfortunately, will struggle on that path, many will not make it to the end, but the majority can, with a bit of support, successfully navigate their way to some degree of success in their lives.
How wonderful 😊
What a wonderful talk. Thank you for sharing. Thanks to your mom for being on the "reimagining train". She can & she did too. Deeply felt. ❤
Tears in my eyes, there's nothing a mom can't do!
Thank you. Beautifully stated. I am so glad to help share the very simple truth of diversity as just that. We find it everywhere and it is everywhere. Neaurodiversity is a blessings. body diversity is a blessing. Go Team Can!!!!
Thanks so much for this video. It gives strength to the people facing the issue. Blessings to you.
Wow... so moving and touching. This video brings tears to my eyes. It's so inspiring. It shows how much effort the speaker and his mother put in. As a mother of son with autism, I can tell how difficult times they may have been through.
I have high functioning autism and his story touches my heart. 💜 My mother is also a wonderful patient mother who encourages me to do everything that I set my mind to because 'I Can'.
I just got a diagnosis of level 2 autism for my son, and was feeling so lost in fear for my son's future. If he could make friends normally, have meaningful relationships, and be happy... Thank you for this video. It tells me there is still hope and my son can grow into an independent happy man.
There is a Dr that you can get in touch with, His (Dr Oselumen Ose) on RUclips. Am excited his meds for epilepsy/seizures works perfectly for me. He also got cure for Autism etc.
Thank you, my 2 year old was just diagnosed yesterday... you are hope, when I needed it most
Thankyou .. it just goes to show the potential in all people, if given the opportunities to blossom. I'm 60 next year and this lockdowns given me the opportunity to listen to people like you and to recognise why lifes been so challenging. I've discovered my tribe (better late than never!🥴) and what amazing people they are makes me burst with pride!! Autism spectrum condition is okay!! Every life is precious and has something to offer. This guy is a beacon for us and his mother - Wow what can I say - we all need to emulate her!! I'm so uplifted thanx again🙂
The doctors told me that my daughter was seriously mentally ill and would be for the rest of her life. I did not buy it. I kept looking for what was really going on. I read everything I could until I found a Tony Atwood video, Could it be Aspergers. It was like he was describing my child. The doctors made her feel like she was broken and needed to be fixed. I could finally tell her she absolutely was not broken, she was autistic and that is perfectly okay.
Your story is touching, thanks for sharing.
Wow, I’m in tears.
That is exactly the reason for my deep distrust of the medical profession. Doctor knows best? Don't count on it.
Exactly... although being autistic is different, it IS ok.
@Pateck Aaron what kind of herbs?
I so well remember teachers sitting in the teacher's lounge (gossip magnet) describing how this child couldn't do this, that child couldn't do that, comparing their differences and their limitations. I never really went to the teacher's lounge much after that. When I went back to teaching 40 years later, nothing had changed. Teachers did the same thing with Einstein, pick, pick, pick. Peeps always asked me how I could teach THOSE children. I loved teaching THOSE children. I was able to celebrate their teeny, tiny baby steps as huge leaps on the human spectrum. Look for those teachers for your children. Demand they celebrate their successes and if they can't--if they don't have that capacity, as many don't--you can build a group of friends, family that does. My son and daughter-in-law celebrate their children's diversity and I am profoundly proud of them.
The only way they will learn is if and/or when autism or any other form of disability affects their own lives. Harsh? Maybe, but it was the likes of THEM who made me feel that way.
Yes, that's right
Truly inspiring. Thank you for posting this video.
Thank you for sharing this amazingly liberating message to all who needs it.
My son has asperger syndrom. Im so blessed to have him. He is AMAZING.
I can definitely relate to you, Mr. Varney. I am on the autism spectrum myself, and I never really liked socializing, actually, I still don't. But my mom always pushes me, always helps me out. She hasn't thrown my school bag through a wall, though I imagine that would end any argument rather quickly.
Thanks Jamie! Hope things at World Vision are going well!
I'm envious of the support network you had since young.
I'm undiagnosed and constantly looking for what I call my "comfortable space" but the lack of "proper" support makes it tougher than it is.
I can't believe I'm seeing this 6 years later. I'm 31, with Asperger's. This inspires me to give back!!!
My son is Autistic child...you inspired me alot....i watch your video again and again...
Thank you 🙏
What a wonderful mother!! She is my roll model from now on!
I wish I could give this video more than 1 thumbs up! As a parent with a recently diagnosed 3 year old, I'm inspired. Thank you Chris.
This is a beautiful speech, thank you. Your mother is awesome, my mum was the same, different message but same intention and it helped a lot. I do believe we need to rethink autism. Thank you again for this. :D
All humans need an 'I CAN' network.
Thank you for this. I am trying to do this with my son. I want to enable him to live his best life.
BRILLIANT Presentation! Thank you for sharing your enlightenment.
This is really very inspiring! I hope many myths are broken soon 🙏🏻 Autism is not what people think it is. I wish more awareness spreads among people.
this video/tedtalk is a gift. THANK YOU.
Very inspiring! Thank you so much for sharing your story.
Thank you for this beautiful video
*"Perfect LOVE ❤️❤️♥️ casts out FEAR!!!"* 👏👏👏💕🎶🕊️😘 ... This is a great testimony of AGAPE PERFECT LOVE 💓 OF A MOTHER THAT HEALS HER SON, BRAVO!!! 👏👏👏😘💕🎶🕊️
A touching story. i wish all responsible people in autism care could understand this in my country. The sentence "Your Child Is Special", is SPECIAL.
Absolutely inspirational speaker and inspirational mum. Us parent's of children on the spectrum are always reevaluating goal posts for everything we hope our children can achieve because times are full of highs and lows and so important not to get stuck in the lows. This is a fantastic reminder to enthusiastically believe "they can!" and WOW - Chris is a shining example :)
so inspiring. Thank so much for sharing 🙏
Thank you so much for this lecture. You have made me realise that what Im doing for my two young children with ASD and the advocate Im being is the right path for them.
Thank you for your time and sharing your journey.
Thank you for the wonderful and inspiring video! Both of my young children are on the spectrum. I hope to be the type of mom you have. Thank you for the boost in motivation.
The ending of the video from 17:18...boy i cudnt hold my tears anymore.......😭
Inspiring but who's cutting onions over here?!
Thanks a lot. I needed this boost. I will probably get back to ur talk everytime i feel low. This is the father of a 3 year old child speaking
I cried happy tears watching this. I found your work through the Village Lantern Podcast and aspire to be an advocate for my child like your mum was for you. Thanks for all that you do in celebrating the different orbits of the ND community.
I really hate it when people say Aspergers is "mild" autism. That makes it sound like it's MILD and affects people MILDLY. Guess what, it's EXTREMELY DIFFICULT to deal with and makes life VERY VERY HARD. It doesn't just make us quirky and a bit shy; it affects literally every aspect of our exhausting, confusing, overwhelming lives.