EP 7 | Rev Dr Portia Khosa on being a young female Pastor, abusive marriage as an academia & author
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- Опубликовано: 13 янв 2024
- March to the EPCSA head office; Church which turned a blind eye to its pastors who abused his wife.
• March to the EPCSA hea...
Yeh Bazalwane! Remember the main reason why Rev Dr HP Khosa is sharing her story is for awareness purposes, she’s being authentic and not filtering anything out so that other women can learn and not put themselves in the same position that she did. This is not about being a victim but being an activist ❤
To get her book Email: hundzukhosa@gmail.com
I Personally admire her honesty, those who have ears will hear, a lot of woman to this day are trapped in those kind of relationships. The power man have over woman its so sad
Where can I get the book I’d like to buy it?
So true, it's a warning and to know that if a man doesn't love you today, he will not love you ever, but he'll increase the abuse. So save yourself from abuse , accept and move on
Shuu Dr this hit home, story of my life 😢
This sounds like mourning for something that never existed
I like the fact that Madam speaker never makes the episodes about herself. She never mentions her previous marriage in interviewee’s story lines 👌🏾
Yes so true…I’m a new suby and after watching this episode for the first time, I was surprised at how she allows her guest to speak without interjecting or wanting to also make this episode about her.
Love her for this
Shes human before being a pastor, shes a woman who wnted to be loved. Thats her path on her journey. We all have our journeys and they are different. I love her transparency because people started judging her .. this is raw and im glad i get to learn a lot from this. Thank
Being too available for a men is bad 😢😢😢 never let a man tell you more than once hes not into you !!!
This makes me sad. But I like her honesty, transparency.
She is so beautiful. The ex husband made zero effort.
such an honest interview , the guest is beautiful and her voice is so amazing.
This ladies story sounds like a movie, im shocked that this was her reality??? Oh ny God
The word of God speaks about unequally yoked. May we apply the words of God to our hearts.
Being inlove with someone that hates you is such a curse hle. It breaks you. The bitterness after 🚮🚮🚮
You can say that again
When the Dr was explaining all the things the 2nd man was doing very early in the relationship- like sending her 10k for lunch- I immediately thought he is love bombing her but then I said to myself I am a pessimist. Lord behold, the entire family love bombed her. I am glad she never agreed to join that family. I feel so bad for the wife, clearly they treat her very badly and see themselves as better than her. Eish! Life is tricky 💔
Getting into a relationship at a young age (before 25) with a person who is older is an extreme sports. Self love must be taught in school and at home because yey I've also seen flames that now I'm like soze! 😂
Haven't heard such a real story from a Pastor/Christian in public before. I was an usher and treasurer at my former church and the things that pastors and committed "Christians" do. Whereas in public they all virgins, sex before marriage is a sin, etc. So glad someone is comfortable to tell their truth like this. A lot needs to change in our churches though. People get away with a lot. Granted, no one is perfect but pastors sending nudes and sending texts about being horny to young members of the church bathong. Also Christians need to stop this attitude of God forgives while intentionally hurting others. Also just wondering, should the elders in this lady's church not been such perverts and instead been good examples of what a good man is. Would she have fallen for her ex husband?
You can say that again "God forgives while intentionally hurting others.." It's 'manipulating' God's mercy.
It takes a lot of courage to talk about your story openly and I applaud this lady for that.. but the problem with people in church including preachers is that they may be good at preaching but have NO actual relationship with God. Most preachers take time in rehearsing and practicing to perform sermons but don't take time in prayer and studying the word so that they can preach from a place of hearing from God and not pleasing the flock. And so they end up preaching about a God they don't even know and then wonder why their lives also end up being very chaotic. Let's actually shift to having a REAL rlship with God and involving Him in our decisions!
They're not ready for this convo. After ignoring signals even a blind person would have seen, she now said that GOD made her marry a madman😳😳😳... Like ma'am you were following your will not HIS.
Low self-esteem is real 😢 Thank you for sharing, hope you find healing in Jesus as you share your story
Madam Speaker you are a powerhouse. You bring us the best of the best. The Dr is wellspoken. She is a good storyteller, I can listen to her for ages. Please tell us how we can buy her book. She is beautiful and she has a beautiful voice. ❤❤❤❤You both look beautiful😊😊❤❤.
Wow, thank you! So much I’m humbled. To get her book Email: hundzukhosa@gmail.com
This is a conversation between electrical engineer and a Doctor, I just thought I should mention that, just incase 😊
What’s with the engineering comments guys I’m so confused 😮😮.
@@madams___speaker😂😂😂love this response
@@madams___speakerI'm thinking, she means two educated women are having a conversation. Trying to be positive here. 😂😂
@@madams___speaker I think it means, this can happen to anyone, no matter your level of education. It can also mean women must uplift each other & not destroy each other. Am subject to corrections ❤
So what?
I've always heard that men can marry people that they hate. I'm seeing it for the first time.
I am married to a man that hate me; I didn't know.
No marn, it can't be true.
Why marry her though.
Its true, most don't marry for love!! They marry for the benefits.
When are we going to learn? When men dont put effort to relationship....let him Go. We sabotage ourselves as women most times. We cant blame these men because they show us but persist.
100%.
The whole billboard is often on display before we even get married! Then we hope marriage will change him. Only setting ourselves up for disaster.
Just love how she has accepted and took all her experiences as a learning experience not beating herself up for what she went through❤
This story reminds me of my ex husband and ex boyfriend after divorce 😢 being abused is not a nice thing and we tend to stay in it because we want to be loved but love is not there we always hoping for the best but we actually dying inside
Do you think if us as women stop having sex outside of marriage, will give us the power to think clearly when it comes to these red flags. My own personal testimony, when I God revealed to me that sex outside of marriage was wrong and I stopped. I started seeing red flags in my dating experience quicker. I realised that my mind was clear to think about what I wanted in the relationship, I wasn't afraid to have difficult conversations. I wasn't clouded by passion.
❤❤
This is where I am too. It becomes difficult to partner with someone because you see everything….it’s painful.
You are correct vision becomes blurred once sex is involved
Which will be a good move.
She is so raw and human. This is some kind of honest that we need from our men of God🙏
Fascinating how our stories are so similar. “We are more alike than we are different”. Thank you both for sharing!
Now this interview was fire, it was yhooo after yhooo. And this lady is so pleasant to listen to, nice pace👌 well structured and honest ❤
Thank you ❤
Loving someone can be painful 😢😢😢
I am glad she healed
Watched the whole of this. I normally don't watch the whole. Very much I can relate to.
Thank you my brother. When are you coming on 🫠🫠🫣🫣
@@madams___speaker Haaai, Me am very reserved. yho.
I can relate ... always wanted to tell my story and experience I had when I was married kodwa I'm stealing healing even today
Loving someone can be painful sometimes
I learned alots here❤
One of my best interviews from Dr Khosa.Very informative.Thank you Madam Speaker❤
😮yho! I need that book ASAP! She is definitely interesting,what a well spoken lady😊
So blessed by this interview. Her life is so similar to mine. After all the trouble i have finally met a man who worships where i walk and iam enjoying being truly loved by the best.
What a a profound interview it was. She's a good storyteller. it was so good it felt like a movie, i could literally see motion in pictures.
I love her openness and she's very beautiful but I'm disappointed that she NEVER once mentioned that having un-marital sex was a sin. This will lead others to think its okay because Rev is doing it and still preaching.
I am in utter shock. I truly thought it would end with that revelation.
@@mywordsmythoughtsmytruth5503this is dangerous.
Revelation 2:14 But I have a few things against thee, because thou hast there them that hold the doctrine of Balaam, who taught Balac to cast a stumblingblock before the children of Israel, to eat things sacrificed unto idols, and to commit fornication.
I was asking where was the descenment😢
I literally came to the comments looking for a comment like this. Like I'm sooo shook by how carnal she is. She is a Rev by name, but so worldly in her stance. Where is her Reverence/ Fear of the Lord she claims to be called by. 😢
@@katmodi exactly, the body of Christ is not ready to hear that sin separates us from God😥. We do not seek to live a consecrated and holy life.
But truth is, the more you sin the further away you are from God, and there is no conviction or discernment. As beautiful and honest the interview is, I would love to hear a follow up to talk about repentance. And her journey with God specifically through everything because I think there is more to the story. And that could not have been highlighted in the interview
I feel like such experiences give us a "human experience" so that we can relate or be relatable to people. People of the cloth can be so out of touch with the world that when you tell them about your challenges all the say is you must fast or pray harder or you don't have faith. However if you are a pastor and have been through stuff like this lady, you become more compassionate, sympathetic and a lot of people will relate to her young and old.
We live in a SICK world...God Father show forth urself amongst women that are in the hands of abusers in Jesus name Amen 😢
Yhoo the married man is manipulative to the core😢. He knew her vulnerability coming from the same church.
She is unbelievably beautiful and smart. Thank you for sharing your story with us ❤
This woman is so wise with a very calm spirit. Ha khensa he vazalwane
Inkomu ñwana mhani ❤
Dr is telling the truth I once dated a married man n I didn't know mind you I was staying with him n the wife n kids were in somewhere in Burgersfort, also the guy was the best boyfriend i ever had. Thank you for the wonderful episode
I love how authentic she is❤
I sympathize with the guest. I think she wasn't ready to serve on the pulpit. I hope she sees that the very thing she is calling out the male pastors/elders for "LUST" is what she herself was fighting and she is not taking accountability.
The worst advice to give is to tell a woman to LOWER STANDARD to enable her get a husband. The person you will lower standard for is the one who will abuse you so much you will wonder what happened to you. I did that and got scammed and my hard earned money got stolen.
I love her, she's well spoken. She's spoken her truth and I believe her. She is beautiful. Woman of honor, imbokodo at a young age. The twins are lucky to have you as a Mom.❤
Unfortunately you can’t force someone to love you. Kids and even marriage won’t make them love you. She knew he didn’t love her but still decided to force things. Sad
I love her. No bitterness at all❤
Eish being blind and seeking security and love can literally kill you,im glad God saved her❤
Eish from now on refuse with your body Dr Khoza , don’t give sex anymore unless who ever you met has married you first . Start right this time .😢and you are Rev 😢
Amen, 🙏 This is one of the lessons that i was hoping she will talk about having learnt and would talk about coz she is a Christian, a Reverend even. I however applaud her honesty and vulnerability
I am watching this for the second time. I love how open and honest Doc is. We thank God for her life, her experiences and her strength...
The day I first saw you via live interview on thobela fm at park inn hotel 2021 made me realize how special you are and I started following you. You build us as woman and we do not take it for granted. Continue with the good work with our lovely sisters.
Thank you Dr for your honesty because most church people shield the wrongs that happen inside churches and shy away from addressing these issues which are real and there
This is such a sad episode yho how did someone just put themselves through so much for so long😭
Wow very insightful. I can relate a divorcee too and fiction of narcissist or manipulator. She was very honest and assertive. I wish we can have more of people sharing such experiences so women can learn to exit toxic relationships and take ownership.
Ooh Abba father direct us to the right marriage. Let ur direction lead us and not our emotions😢😢😢
Dr u actually made my day. U know how to narrate ur story. The fact that u still believe in love n marriage touched me. May u get the right guy in ur life
🙌🙌❤️❤️
I'm glad she spoke so honestly and lovingly. She's not vindictive. What would elevate her is her description and relationship with God and how she went on to fornicate after she was hurt
She's healed, that's why, mostly speak too quick
Yeah that part is so questionable
I'm so shocked at the 180 this story took haino😂😂😂😂 so glad for her cause respectfully, WTF😩😩😩😩
Let such talks and experiences be shared so young and old ladies can know their worth and the power we have and that it's ok not to allow to be mistreated and it's ok to break up and be a divorcee. Loving ourselves is more important
Easily one of the most authentic interviews ive ever come across..as for all the perfect people making judgements on the comment section..we are sorry for being human..hau..let the Dr be
Ladies love yourself first period. Then you can love other people. Don’t compromise yourself for being seen being successful while you suffering mentally. It’s not easy to be single but it’s worse to be in an abusive relationship. Especially you beautiful women be beautiful inside and outside do not let men walk all over you.
True story teller is interesting God blessed Dr Khoza
What an encouraging story and testimony. Arise women platforms like this are empowering🥰
We learn everyday and today I learned alot , thanks alot❤❤❤
My pleasure 😊❤️
Thank you for the honesty, it shows how deep co-dependency is. Co-dependency is a form of self abandonment. What confuses me a bit is - where was her faith / God’s leading when entering these relationships 🤔. Thank you again for showing us what it looks like to come out the other side.
This episode was what i needed. I can relate to so much from the beautiful Dr's story, and i love her courage and strength. I need to get that book!
I got ordained at 20 years old 😢our stories might not be the same, but I can related to her pain🙏🏽I was in the process of leaving my calling 🙏🏽but now I am fired up to continue doing what I am called for and stand on business for young girls👌
Best interview ever! Loved this real authentic conversation. Madam Speaker is literally the best interviewer!! We need you i bigger screens❤
Thank you so much 🙏🏿
My thoughts exactly, feels like she's been doing this for life.
Yoh my sister all those initial red flags 😔😔😔
As for being in love alone I knw the feeling, it took me almost 5years, I'm dating this divorcee who doesn't knw how to love me, been patient with him for too long I think I've even lost my true identity in loving him Infact I wish he came with a manual on how to love him as a divorcee
I love the way the Woman of God is so honest❤
Your podcasts are eye openers. Thank God for people like you ❤❤
Phew, this was absolutely stunning. Her openness and truthfulness about the social ills of society.
Thank you for your transparency. I can relate to most of your story. Only by God's grace am I now content, settled and finally making progress in every area of my life. God is faithful.
Lovely interview. Both parties delivered to the T!
Madam speaker if u see this please pass it on to the shooting crew if u feel it makes sense : before shooting, take a pic of the host and guest sitting in either seats. It may seem trivial but trust me when getting to the elevated levels its these small attention to details that make a difference. So in this case,given you wore a popping colour, you shouldnt have set next to that back cupboard with the same poppiny colour. Ur outfit would make the military green side pop. Same tones of orange can be picked in the guest's outfit as in the painting behind her. So switching positions would have really complimented the set.
I know it may seem trivial but i thought to mention it because picture quality👌 studio setting👌 sound 👌...this im adding as an extra
Thank you so much although you’re speaking French to me I believe @NdivhuT will understand you better
What a likeable woman. So funny and smart. Sad what she went through. Thank God she survived.
Unfortunately in the church abuse is being enabled .
True
THIS STORY IS POWERFUL . I LOVE HER HONESTY AND ACCOUNTABILITY.
wow this interview was deep!!! thank you so much Rev Dr Portia and madam speaker
I have a feeling the 2nd man and the wife were separated during the time they met, and then later fixed things. There's no way the married woman would agree to be hidden for 3 years, a makoti attends the in law functions. The good thing about the second encounter is the fact that despite the discord in this encounter, she somewhat got some healing and experienced the warmth of being in a relationship. We learn everyday! Thanx madam speaker
Thanks for sharing your story Ma'am. For all things considered, I think we're missing one thing...(true men's voices)
Thank you so much for this Episode,
This Episode has made me realise that God does not want perfection, He wants our hearts. Thank You Dr for The Vulnerability and your Honesty! So many of us are Christians that have been shamed in so so many ways, we also forget that God accepts us as is. So thank you for Reminding us that God Is a God that loves us whether people love us or not.
🙌🙌🙌🙌❤️❤️❤️❤️
Loved it!!!
Thank you.I downgraded too.I was married all by myself.I resonated with you
This is a sad story but I am so proud that she is now is the right mental space. Women need to learn about Narcissists, I never knew what that was until I dated one for about 2, 3 months and then I watched every video on RUclips. Today, I can smell a narcissist person from far... They are like wolves in sheep clothing. The first redflag for her was when the guy said, I forgot to tell you that I relocated. We as women always ignore the little redflags. I wish you well Doc.
As a young minister too I have learned today
I just love the fact that u r very academic, academic women r my role models
I've met a sincere human pastor not a hypocrites. Yes people expected to see your story narrating protect the pulpit. Thank you sister
🙌🙌🙌THISSS
Weak men are intimidated by strong independent women.
If a man shows up without a purse, just know he's NOT husband material (yet).
Love the conversation
She had seen it all, the honesty is so deep. I could listen to her all day.
Love the episode
Wonderful ❤
Lovely story indeed.
Wow ,you story Dr moved me
There's indeed nothing new under the sun
This sounds like my first relationship as well, had he not ghosted me this is probably how our story was gonna end like. When the relationship ended I felt like my world was falling apart I even had to repeat the year 😂. Reminds me of a quote "God will break your heart to save your soul"
Thanks for the quote 🙏🙏🙏
❤Thank you so much Dr. You've a true Christian, and I love the fact that you are speaking the truth. Your soft voice and ur bravenest.....wow be blessed, never mind what ppl say , u're the best. I love you
Real talk 🙏
@madam speaker also people think when you come from a broken home, you won't succeed in marriage because didn't grow up with that
All i want to say is thank u so much🙏
Why do i relate so much 😭😭
Well spoken. I would buy her book.
Loved it thoroughly ❤🎉
Dr HP Khoza such a beautiful soul, very humble.. you are such an inspiration to many that look up to you… your hardship in life gave you such a powerful testimony.. I’m glad to have be led by you throughout my youth at masana parish. You one of the strongest people I know.. much love Rev ❤
Wow, thank you ❤️❤️❤️
The honesty level here🔥🔥🔥🔥