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The Hand You've Been Dealt...
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- Опубликовано: 18 авг 2024
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In contrast to many claims, life isn't primarily about playing the hand that you have been dealt, rather that is the unavoidable consequence of being stuck with an undesirable hand in the first place, yet if you were to listen to common wisdom, your actual hand has little impact because you can turn your cards into anything you want...allegedly.
You are not playing the cards you've been dealt, you are the cards.
A great summation of determinism
Wrong, you are both the Cards and the Player.
@@Music-gw4qf
Hahaha, okay, Schrödinger.
We are also dead and alive, north and south, east and west, the Alpha and Omega...
Oh, and for all the woketards out there : male AND female. LOL
The sculpture and the sculpter
@rossperreault3199 I am pretty sure he was more trying to signal boost than hijack.
For every guy with a bad hand that "makes it" (gets rich, celebrity status, sports star, hot girlfriends) there are thousands that fail. But we only pay attention to the guy who makes it and say "see he can do it bro you just need to work hard." While the thousands that fail are invisible.
It's sickening.
The reason such men are so known is precisely because the rest failed. If everyone owned a Twitter company, it wouldn't be special
The ultimate anti-narcissist revelation: you are nothing special and never will be. Embrace your averageness or, in my case, below averageness.
They will tell you that they had x characteristic, one thing that was supposed to make them fail, while they hide completely the rest of it that made them succeed. For example, they will say oh i was born to a poor family, and then they tell you that they are tall and attractive, so they have made something in their life. But they will point out their one bad thing while overlooking the other stuff, making believe everyone else can do it. What they can't see (or they just refuse to tell you this) is some people, a lot actually, are born with multiple such limitations that prevent them from become the sigma male billionare. Not everyone can become that. There will be many that try and fail and wonder why, even though they have done all the bs they have been told. I suspect most of us are born lucky enough to be relatively healthy and more or less some countries that you can have easy access to resources, we should be grateful for that. There's also tons of people who don't have this baseline met, and that baseline is their dream. Not everyone can be a hoe slayer no matter how many gym sessions they have been to and how much game they have. Not everyone will build that business. It's entirely individual so you must proceed with your own critical thinking and judge what the best course of action is, short-term and long-term. So you can eliminate your suffering in the future, not that it will make you the sigma male quintilionarre.
Yup, survivorship bias
This is why I hate the motivational bullshit industry so much. It's the one person who made it saying everybody who didn't is a loser for not making it.
People only accept this reality when they can use it to dodge accountability. For example: they did really, really dumb things, they'll say " I was young" or " I was a DIFFERENT person back then" "I wasn't in my right mind" etc. However when they succeed, its "That's all me, my hard work, my grind, my free will and good choices." As I persist in this life, I'm starting to realize people don't really believe in anything. Like morality, their beliefs will change with whatever circumstances calls for it.
really well said
@@cabooseocallaghan6229 Thank you.
Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.
Oscar Wilde
Morality and beliefs are only post-fact rationalizations. I took me time to understand it.
Totally agree.
My entire extended dysfunctional family always reminds me they have no responsibility in screwing up my life. Next time, I'll make sure to pick better parents.
Good luck with that, next time plan ahead. Ask about your next life, only opportunity to do that. A deal is a deal at the end of the day in the non-life.
@@Parlimant_Strifey I can think of no worse form of Hell than reincarnation, because you're uncertain of the outcome, and then you'll likely regret the outcome. If, however, reincarnation entails repetition, than that truly is a fate worse than any version of Hell that mankind has ever conceived.
@@nailinpalin1477 indeed…go towards the darkness to escape those cycles 🔄
@@Parlimant_Strifey I'm currently writing a best seller called, "How to be born to the richest people on the planet." It's at least as useful as Jordan Peterson's manifesto.
At what point will you take responsibility for yourself as an adult?
"Some people live to eat, other people eat to live."
Wow. Nailed it!
didnt expect to see you here dude. thx for the fitness advice.
Shocked to see you here dude. I just finished watching one of your videos before coming here.
I just live off: “It is what it is”.
It do be like that.
Real
@@JohnSmith-ox3gy They don't think it be like it is, but it do.
It is what it is
Unless it isn't
Which it often is
To accept the things we cannot control.
Life in two parts: 1. You get dealt a hand. 2. Play it. In the middle is the heavy lifting -- honestly figuring out your cards. The genetic crap-shoot includes a myriad of attributes: IQ, ambition, grit, initiative, vision, temperament, etc.. The sooner that you can figure out where you stand in terms of these characteristics, the sooner you can get on with your life. Lead with your strengths, place 'orange cones' around your weaknesses. Cultivate mutually beneficial relationships with individuals that can fill in the gaps. Periodically examine your cards -- some genetic attributes manifest later than others. Target and achieve 'wins' no matter how small. Keep moving forward.
Great comment, I'm giving this one some love. A short "Guide to living"
How im suposed to cope with the fact that im low iq and low height for example?
@@polkanietzsche5016if below 84, you’re pretty much up shit creek. 88-95, find something that works or parrot (copy) someone that is successful doing something you know you can do if you bend everything to it. Also look for your local Warren Buffet in your family or friend circle. See if they would be willing to invest your money and they take 50% of the profits. They might bite, they might not, but have everything written up. You’re still taking a chance either way.
"some genetic attributes manifest later than others" I love this point!
As a single man I agree with the statement "Your hand matters the most"
"Quite the handshake you've got there, fella"
Ha.
Thinking ape is a compassionate man.
Very Intelligent man I would say . Hes quite funny in a dry way and I like that . Hes such a great person to listen to .If he wrote a book I would buy it . What I love about him is he just tells you how it is and no bullshit .
Just don’t be an insomniac, bro
Just go to sleep earlier. It worked for my friends uncle!
Too late for that
Just sleep sweaty, if I lie down I sleep it's that easy.
Just ignore the insomnia bro
Yeah stardusk is just using excuses. No excuses, just do it, just sleep bro
Good reminder, thank you.
I'm so exhausted by the incessant "do better bro" mentality surrounding almost everything now. I can't even sit and take a pause for a day and reflect on how far I have come in my life and what I've accomplished. There's always someone else to come along and remind me I'm not working hard enough for whatever I am doing at the current time. It's awful, and people do really need to slow down and take into account that most of us are really just trying as hard as we can.
So, I don't have the girl, or sex, or a huge mcMansion in the right neighborhood, or a brand new sports car, or can go on five beach vacations a year. I have my modest house in a reasonably priced real estate market in the midwest. I have two paid for vehicles. I have no debt. I have money in the banks and investments. I eat well. I work out several times a week. I work on my house. I spend time with my family. No, I'm not a "success" according to the manosphere because I don't endlessly slay p*ssy, but I'm not doing poorly either!
Those people are always trying to sell you something so they can "do better, bro" by profiting off the "just do better, bro" mentality
The US is a soul-grinder for average males.
The material things don't satisfy, so I'm selling my stuff (only the car, one room, and work/gaming laptop at this point), and moving to (ofc- the place with options) SE Asia in mid-30s. The brokerage account, HYSA, doing okay, but they're just means to ends.
I don't see why a lot put up with the struggle in such an atomized and uncaring place as the US. It doesn't pay off anymore, and I can't imagine finding someone & going back to suburbia hell.
I agree. Also, you are much more successful than many people in similar societies with similar starting statuses. You don't need to be Mr. O'Worldowner to have a life which satisfies you. If this is what you value, and you're good with it, why would you need to "git gud"?
I am a minimalist by nature and live very well on a moderate income. I have absolutely no need or desire to "keep up with the Jones" and couldn't care less what others think of me. If I want to "slay p" I would travel to the Philippines, Colombia or Eastern Europe. The women there are a about ten times hotter than in the US. Since my divorce my stress-level has fallen to the floor. I would say that being a bachelor/mgtow is a cheat code for life.
You made it and same here. Just enjoy. I left the rat race a few yrs ago. I don’t own or buy things anymore. I personally subscribe to the notion that things you own will tend to own you. I just want to live comfortably with low stress and not worry about money or expenses
You are the cards (genetics) and the player is life (no free will)
Thanks for sharing Stardusk. This video will surely help alotta people.
My “limitation” is the trauma from having grown up in an abusive and chaotic home, while also being constantly bullied in school. I’ve been stumbling around through life and wondering why I feel so lost and out of place, but I now realize it’s because I’ve been living a broken existence and didn’t know it. I’m now in my 40s, and I’ve accepted the hand I’ve been dealt. It’s a tough pill to swallow, but, I’ll take reality over delusion any day.
I find existence meaningless. It's all about that loosh for archons.
Your experience is more common than you might know.
@@Anomalyy666 archons are eating good from my plate.
It's all just a game
That may sound depressing but the truth is that you should take it to mean that you can do your best mixed ik with what you want and you dont have to worry so much about getting it right
Same. This hookup and divorce culture really wrecked havoc on us huh?
My mother once said when I was in my twenties. "Everyone is the smith of his own happiness". I have to laugh so much and said, "Sure, if you grow up with a single, alcoholic, violent, mother. And constantly have to struggle with reproaches and neglect. Is this one of the best starts in life and you can become anything"
Something my dad would say, the biggest hypocrite alive
My mother said that bs too, yet she married my dad and he then became an alcoholic xD
U2 yeah its wierd moms are nightmares the bad ones like really bad I can't stand women beyond a little bit cuz of it ...I don't hate them but it's a thin line especially since women hate me anyway so double standards don't apply ...I've had problems with the community since Jesus left ...oh no community just people that hate me but still .
So many copERs already saying play the bad hand well JFL . You can only bluff with a bad hand in poker and pray you get lucky every now and then. There is no turning a pile of 💩 into something worth having . Life is not worth the effort for %90 of men
Less like poker, more like MTG without mulligan. Some times you get manascrewed.
@@JohnSmith-ox3gy Less like MTG in my case, more like playing current Yu-gi-oh with an outdated deck. My cards are so bad, I don't even get to play. It was over before it began.
They always leave out that professional poker players fold like 80% of the time from the outset when dealt bad hands. Not a good look for their analogy applied to life.
Life is great it's no jobs and stupid laws and war and gas that keeps us in a really f up place ...paying for energy is killing some of us food and fuel is what makes it worth it without money this is just slow torture for no reason .
Sadly 70% of life just comes down to luck
life is 99% luck with your genes and early life environment, the 1% is the little choices you make as an adult to basically minimise the bad luck
Not just your genetics, but where you live and who is in your surrounding too. I've heard way too many people say that everyone has an equal chance at life, but that is the most bullshit thing i have ever heard.
@@Tommy-t1g Exactly. And they will point to someone who "made it" in spite of poor genes or circumstances, while ignoring the thousands of people that don't.
@@Krelian4400 i recall bathrobe man once said that you can think of someone with similar circumastances who has made it. Basically implying "just be the exception to the rule bro" i wish it was that easy.
100%, actually. The potential for developing ability to work hard is also genetic. I don't even think it's 99%, cause the choices you make are also determined by genes, as your values depend on senses and cognitive functions and all of that is genetic.
The hand I was dealt wen I was born in 19/77 was me being a slow learner and me being short I stand 5 foot 4 and I live on a fixed income and I receive disability so when it comes to women well let's just say lady luck does not shine down on me and I still have my v card so that doesn't help me nun but I don't need sympathy I didn't ask to be born but hear I am all I can do is make the most out of what life gave me and make the most of it and move forward in life maybe I will meet someone maybe I won't who knows all I can say is life would be easier with someone in it I mean I am only human the heart wants what the heart wants I have love to give and no one to give it to I have to arms to hold someone but no one to hold I have a heart to give but no one to give it to and that is what really hurts
My biggest fear of having a kid is making them live through hardships I've created for them simply by virtue of birth. If I cannot afford the luxuries given to other children, the isolation they'd feel would make them vulnerable to anyone with more financial endowment. I also worry about the ability to raise my children to be successful without leaving that door open for them as well in the job market as I worry about the future of the masses. The age of people like my parent's are long gone, barely anyone is putting in savings for their children. We live in a society of children and children raised by children.
I had the same fears as you about financial limitations, comparisons etc. My daughter could not get the same toys as many other children but I tried to compensate by teaching her and make her curious about different subjects and that was no (so) limited by my lack of money (at that time).
@@magnushelin007 Don't feel bad, I am mostly speaking from a space of inexperience. I fear the unknown truly and simply of not knowing. I pray in the passage of time I shall find the answer
@@trevinsingh9390 It worked out allright. I live in Norway and lived and worked with me (her mother lives in Spain). She earned more money in Norway in a week than her friends in Spain in a month. She will be able to buy an apartment in Valencia, Spain next year (where she is studying now). This is perhaps an example of Geomaxing and playing our cards right. Moving from Spain to Norway has been very important for both of us.
@@magnushelin007 Well I am very glad for how things turned out for you. Living in North America myself, it has become aware to me that a lot of immigrants wish to permanently settle here. I wouldn't have a problem with this normally, but the system can be fooled into letting in people that are unwanted. Money isn't necessarily the issue rather that I have nothing saved up currently at the moment. I guess I am no where near ready for having kids but I still dread not giving my children the best effort to afford them a better life than I had.
@@trevinsingh9390 Taking in too many immigrants at a time, not taking immigrants based on needs of the country, ends up being unfair to everybody, including the immigrants and almost always going forward generationally in terms of their integration/assimilation into the new country. Most people don't see that. The governments who do that, know they are hurting country, state and people, but they don't care.
“It’s not the hand you’re dealt, but how you play it”.
The optimal way to play most hands is to fold.
There are things nobody gets to decide. When and where you are born, who your family is, and the body you are born into.
I'm 50. 6 years ago I lost 140 lbs. I do 20k+ steps a day, resistance training 6 days a week. Now all the women in my family were and are overweight . mother, sister, her kids, grandmother. Because of my genetics I can never get 'shredded' .I've tried. when I get close to single digit body fat my hunger goes through the roof, energy drops through the floor. But I've learnt this, I can get close enough where It dosent limit my life, around 15%ish. Yes what you've been dealt with does limit you, but you can work around it and make the most of what you do have
Yea this whole idea that anyone can get shredded is bunk. I can barely get below 20% bodyfat, I get so hungry and weak that it's just not sustainable.
15% body fat is very healthy. I wouldn’t pursue a shredded physique if it was at the cost of my mental health and energy.
@realistic delinquent agree. because I'd always been overweight I wanted to see how far I could go, personal satisfaction if you will, to see if I could do it.
Sure, but the point is "most of what you do have" is not necessarily enough.
@@jokerpilled2535 I feel healthy and good at around 12, and have been extremely lean before. Whatever your genetic range is for feeling good is where you should stay
Life is an endless road of Ls, doesn't matter whether you are born into wealth or not. You're getting Ls all the time. It is just a cope at the end of the day when people proclaim they have the life success, also just a cope again. They don't ever mention their on-going Ls you notice.
Is sex cope
@@Satanic-DanSex is a major W, for those that have the extreme privilege of having access to sex. But for those who have no access to sex, like myself, all we can do is cope about how we're not missing out. It's a miserable existence.
@@Satanic-DanAnything of this world is a cope
Not all Ls are equal, and I think the reason that those who are successful don't explain their Ls either never experienced them (positive feedback loop) or do not tell about them because it lessens their status and ego. Though an L like, total isolation from all human contact throughout all of childhood, dysfunctional family, being unable to get a job, ugly, homeless, etc. you will have people try to convince you (and themselves) that L is equal to say, "yea one month I had the flu and it was really bad" for example. The only way to effectively cope with that is to accept that is how it is, but other people do not want to accept that because they haven't been forced to understand.
Reminds me of an old saying of mine: "their not assholes because their rich, their rich because their assholes."
Funny thing is even most people I looked up to as wise, admire people with status. They totally ignore the a-hole factor.
Just be confident bro.
Don't forget to lift and shower. For optimization of your time, you should lift while you shower.
@Curteouss 😎
It’s over.
@@MajorIronwood Nothing wrong if you hitting gym and take care of your health.
@@saberbo89 Fucking duh. That's not the point obviously.
Environment counts for very little. The difference in wealth and fitness between me and my brothers is breathtaking. On the other hand, I was born with above average intelligence, extreme self-discipline, enough testosterone to easily get muscle gains and to be competitive, and (this one is amazing) virtually all food tastes good to me - including brussels sprouts and broccoli! My parents were manual laborers. I am simply blessed by my genes while my brothers were less so. My parents provided us with very good food and a basically predictable environment (always lived in the same nice house in the suburbs). Fortunately, that is most of what kids need - even if they are otherwise not well treated by parents. I was the valedictorian of my high school. I did have to study at least 3 hours a night on average - I am no genius. But discipline and competitive spirit has allowed me to have quite a good life. Now for limitations. I have average memory, below average ability to function in stressful situations, am highly sensitive to other peoples' emotions. Those traits made it absolutely impossible for me to be either a manager or entrepreneur.
I very wisely accepted those limitations. Know your limits. Respect yourself enough to know when you have done your best and leave it at that. Subjectively, I always felt that I was accomplishing so much. But when I reflect on it, my genes determined my talent, competitiveness, and self-discipline. There was no other way to be. That is why the question of free will has always been unanswered. We feel like we are making choices but are never fully aware of the degree to which our genes commanded us to act in a certain way.
Yes! This is the important point I like to remember. Even if you can't pick your hand, you can still make the most of what you can. And as your comment kind of alludes to, sometimes our strengths can overcome our weaknesses (IE someone with exceptional self-discipline can push through a naturally poor physique, for example, and turn it into a great one. Not exactly your example, but kind of what I got from it.)
do you help your less fortunate brothers with money and stuff??
I have mild cerebral palsy which effects the way I walk and only measure at 5’6. At some point you just accept what your hand is and just deal with it.
It doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll have success in the sexual market place or other aspects of your life, it just means you have tapped out to reality
As a kid I always hated the concept of fate or destiny, that your life was already predetermined. But as an adult I realize that your life will be largely determined by your genes and environment, neither of which you control.
On one hand you have James Hetfield who was born with the right brain talent & voice at the right time, and on the other you have people with Down Syndrome. It’s really hard not to become nihilistic.
James Hetfield isn't even that great a singer, just like Kurt Cobain wasn't a great guitarist. Both bands were lucky to be in the right place at the right time.
This is liberating. I've accepted my fate. My self esteem will always be low. I'll be anxious for pretty much everything. I'll always expect the worst even if the odds are in my favor. That's the hand I've been dealt with, and that ok.
Sounds like good traits for a Chief Risk Manager at a bank.
Good physique btw
You don't actually think it's okay, though.
@@LustyLichKing at least I won't be gambling people's money on shady startups and risky assets 😅
This resonates with me deeply
Yep, this is why twins, separated at birth, grown up in completely different families and environments, not knowing each other, ends up doing the same things, even having the same opinions. How little environment affects us, is the biggest surprise/unexpected results in the field of psychology. Only thing that really changes a person is intense trauma, especially during childhood (speaking from experience).
Regarding your sleep, Stardusk. I've used a fitbit smart watch to monitor my sleep stages for 3 years now. It really helps experimenting and figuring out what personally improves my deep sleep (types of medicines, minerals, activities before bed etc), since that's the most important stage for recovery and feeling rested. For example, 4 hours of sleep with 1 hour deep sleep, feels much better than 6 hours of sleep without any deep sleep. I naturally was skeptical of how a simple pulse measurement could track different sleep stages you need an EEG to accurately track. But I saw a video of a scientist sleeping 40 nights with both EEG and several different smart watches (fitbit was the most accurate) and it was about 85% similar to the EEG were the majority of error was the lighter stages, so the accuracy of deep sleep is pretty impressive. Wish you well.
Wow that was informative. I'm a chronic insomniac.
@@richardbrown8269 Same here brother. It ruins every aspect of life and people won't ever understand the struggle. "Just go to bed early" or "You're not tiring yourself out first" are classics. Personally I've found the medication "quetiapin" 25mg to work most of the time, with a break every third of fourth night, to not get addicted or having to increase the dosage. It comes with a foggy hangover the next day also unfortunatly, but artificial sleep is better than none, like I use to say. Sink and Magnesium also seems to improve sleep about 5-10% maybe. Room temperature about 18 degrees celcius and earplugs is something I'm also religious about. My only real advice is to experiment under the monitoring of a smart watch, since everyone will react differently to different methoods. Other things I've found to work is eating more fibers in general, having some easy digestable carbs and proteins 1-2 hours before bed (never go hungry to bed). And sometimes 1 beer and/or paracetamol 250-500mg (this is obviously something you can't do every night).
I think intense trauma can change someone well beyond childhood but I agree with almost everything you said!
Often we dont know ourselves properly until later life and after a lot of stress-testing. That's how, for many people, they realise what their limitations actually are, or even the full hand they were dealt. Unless it's something obvious.
The problem with the adage of "play the hand you've been dealt" is that there are many hands which are impossible to win with. For instance, of those who are born with genetic flaws, making certain things impossible (i.e. a paraplegic unable to play sports or work, an autistic person having trouble with relationships, etc.). Even if these individuals play the hand they've been dealt as expertly as possible, they still end up losing because they never had a chance to win with these cards in the first place.
Don't forget about genetical "inheritance" like paranoid shizophrenia. I have a friend which I knew from back when we both was 12 and he always looks like just a normal guy. Got education, had two long relationships with some bad endings and few months ago he got a new job at some grocery store in other city. We write to each other for a long time now, but in February he started to talk more and more about his colleagues bullying and harrasing him. At first I was very cautious about this, but when he continued to tell this story he ended up telling me they put "worms in my phone". He wrote "I can't normally sleep every night because they scream through my phone, voices aren't stopping until morning". Last time we contacted each other, he told me that he's going to suit them and send me a video there he's filming them at the job place and shouting to them that they are " ruining his life". I tried to calm him down and support but I understand that he has no ability to stop himself from now on. This malaise is only going to progress.
And then I remembered that his mother was put in mental hospital back then he was only 5.
I don't know how he felt his life was like, but the author of one of the best history books ever written, The Conquest of Mexico, was written by a man confined to a hospital bed most of his adult life. He had poor motor control and scrawled giant words on sheets of paper, which an assistant would then transcribe and read back to him. He was a success even if he didn't know it.
I’m indian(already over) plus I grew up in an incredibly abusive family(kinda comes with being Indian tbh). I was also bullied relentlessly all throughout my elementary to high school years. I’ve been fed soy milk and antibiotics from birth because I had a mystery illness and my mom couldn’t produce breast milk. I suspect this has lead to multiple disorders and deficiencies throughout my body. The vegetarian/vegan diet that we’re forced to eat probably didn’t help either. I can’t gain muscle and have less strength than most women. I go to the gym 5 to 6 days a week for around an hour every day. I take cold showers daily and eat very clean. Yet the results after 6 months of none stop grind is abysmal to straight up none existant. I give my all every workout and can feel the burn and soreness from my muscles. On top of that I work a dead end minimum wage job. Even though I make no progress in life and realistically life probably isn’t going to get any better I’m still continuing to grind the gym and work. This is all I know how to do. I feel there are many men just like me in society who are stuck in an endless loop and that no matter how hard we try we aren’t going get what we want. It’s important to be realistic in life
So sorry to hear that bro. You need to figure out how to make more money dude. How old are you?
@@apreviousseagle836 I’m only in my early 20s. Believe me I know I need more money especially with the coming economic hardships. Unfortunately I’m to dumb to work normal hard working jobs. The life of a minimum wagie really seems to suit me. I go down the route of working longer hours. I’ve made almost double what I should’ve last year
@@Rob_479 Are you in India?
@@apreviousseagle836 no I was born and raised in the west
@@Rob_479 In your early 20's is still super young to turn it around dude. For starters, why are you going to the gym 6 times a week? what's your body fat right now? how tall are you?
This video was real and ruthless. A lot of rats will not like this.
This shooting for the stars garbage is unfortunately what a lot of us go for & next thing half your life is over & your left in a pile of burnt out, depressed misery. Even if you do reach the stars, you’re probably not staying there & it’s a long way down
Most people who reach the stars were put in spaceships as kids by their parents. The type of work required to reach the stars is too much time and work for one person to accomplish in one lifetime.
If you took a group of professional poker players and had them all draw only exactly one hand, what would happen? Good poker players don't somehow turn bad hands into good hands, but they recognise bad hands and know not to gamble too much on those cards. Then they get another hand of cards, and keep playing till they win on better average results than less skilled players. But in life, we only ever get dealt one hand.
And we have no choice but to go all in. There is no chance to wait for the next round.
i like this conversation
if you believe in reincarnation , then maybe next life we will be dealt different cards or worse ..
“Just get luckier bro”
I have had multiple sclerosis for 36 years, since I was 15... I have massive limitations, as I can only sit in a wheelchair, I need my arms to help me sit up and not fall out of the chair. However, I push those limitations as far as they will go as often as I can, because this is the only life I have. If I just let things ride, my life will suck. I take cold showers and do push-ups every day Because I can... For now.
We are supposed to push our limitations... not use them as an excuse. IMO
Your inspiring bro.. honestly.. keep at it..
@@viledisturbance1869 I never said we were the same or even hinted at.
I said, don't use your limitations as an excuse.
I'm really trying to understand some people's presupposition about "this is the only life I have, so I must do everything within my limit/power". Why? What is original basis or fundamental rule for this thesis to be born?
I see this just as another example of axiom for the sake of axiom like "To be alive is good", " This is the only life I have, I should do everything that I can", "Never stop until you drop" and etc.
Aside from our biological survival instinct program that put us in the cage of our own inability to not choose life, what are real arguments for your thought procces on this topic?
@@trickytrack00 I am sick with a very bad degenerative nerve disease. To just sit and And accept that, leads me nowhere. I push myself to see what I can do and then I push further... because the alternative is to sit in front of the TV all day, get fat and have my muscles succumb to atrophy. That is not an acceptable option for living, to me.
I don't understand why anybody would accept "substandard" as a option for life, If with some effort and determination they could make it even a little bit better. Effort and determination are part of a mind set that is good for everybody to have.
Everythings I have achieved in my life, was while suffering with this disease and big limitations, but nothing would have happened had I listened to my body and just accepted my limitations .
Not sure this is the answer you're looking for but, it's the answer I am giving you. Thanks for your question.
@Vile Disturbance 🇷🇺 thank you for your description of this phenomenon, glad to see another clever human being.
On the point about the man walking past the bakery. I'm an alcoholic and used to have a hard time because the grocery store directly on route from work was right beside a liquor store.
I made the conscious decision to change my route and go a bit out of my way to hit a different store on the way home so the need to fight temptation doesn't arise.
It's sometimes more helpful to contemplate the circumstances leading up to your failure and address them than go the pure willpower route.
Agreed, changing your environment to avoid temptation is a route people should definitely try taking when they are trying to change their behavior.
I tore my right rotator cuff by trying to get stronger. I tore my right calf by jogging everyday for years trying to lose weight. I think I have a problem with my left ACL from doing more advanced yoga. I might need surgery for some of these injuries, and probably can't afford it. I lost 120 lbs from fasting and screwed up my metabolism, possibly causing me to develop type 2 diabetes. On top of these things I used to work 50+ hours a week to get that grind which just cut into my sleep and kept me sick. No more ubermensch grindset for me. I'm done with all that.
Sorry to hear you had so many complications, keep eating healthy if you can though, maybe do some low impact/intensity resistance training just for the mental health benefits, just some ideas.
Hope you're doing well.
Take care.
@@tatuira93 Honestly, taking a walk is enough to get those mental health benefits, or at least a tolerable form of them.
Seems like the path I am on. Injuries are accumulating while I keep pushing. I hope they were worth the trouble later in life.
The greatest freedom is realizing you have little to none of it.
"ACKNOWLEDGING LIMITATIONS"
YES! Thank you for addressing this distinction!!
It pisses me off when people try and twist that into one "making excuses"!!
Such is the cookie-cutter mentality of the "one size fits all" outlook, insisting that ONE standard applies the same and equally to all for the same outcome, when it bloody well does NOT.
That's one thing that has always bothered me. Most people aren't self reflective at all. They just go through life oblivious to many things. I still sometimes feel that people play dumb on purpose when they know another person is struggling and it's their way of not wanting to acknowledge any problems.
As far as achieving big things are concerned, we are seeing more and more how the media loves to put down those who are successful and popular. This alone makes it not worth pursuing.
“All determinism and no free will makes Jack a dulled boy.” - Tom Klarfeld
Go on...
Thinking free will doesn’t exist is for materialist, prideful losers who think that the past few hundred years of ‘science’ beats humanity’s millennia old multidimensional knowledge.
Get a life and find Jesus, in any order. It’s nauseating to see grown men feeling so sorry for themselves.
Can we also talk about the availability, affordability, and ease of access to dozens of vices with insane amounts of temptations maybe 10x what people 100 years ago didn’t have?
Was it really that hard to not be an alcoholic when all there was whiskey at a dive bar?
Was it really that hard to not be lusting after women when you lived on a farm and didn’t even see strangers and women wore modest dresses and didn’t bathe?
Was it really that hard to avoid the temptation of gambling when there wasn’t a casino within a weeks horseback ride?
Was it really that hard to avoid the temptation of drugs when they didn’t even exist?
Was it really that hard to resist getting fat when there was no fast food restaurants or for that matter any restaurants or Uber eats?
I just think about what happens in certain countries where all of that stuff is absolutely haram and wonder where the upside is.
Too many layers of determinism, even if you mental gymnastic your way out of one matrix you arrive at yet another matrix.
Determinism doesn't care.
I love it when gurus make videos about how to become “successful”. Their success is largely due to luck, the algorithm choosing them, and good looks.
Took me years to understand I didn't have the best relationship with food. Always just viewed it as fuel, means to an end. Had to really work at incorporating more variety into my diet and enjoying food as opposed to just counting macros. Instead of being a human calculator when I'm eating a meal in a restaurant, I had to slow down and appreciate the food.
I was the opposite, I would eat if I was bored just for the sensation of flavor. Further proof that we are genetically disposed to certain things
@@joebwer6963 same here, and it’s difficult for me to lose weight
I don't eat cuz no weed so I'm looking like a Crack head and my psychiatrist is like this med supposed too make you eat whatever dip shit it does but I'm broke and angry f food I'm still angry they dint make a pill for that apparently still in 2023 .
Don't judge a man be what he has achieved. Judge him by what he has overcome.
Man can empathize, through common suffering.
Heres some other measures that drastically influence this.
The ability to make mistakes or experience failure without it being catastrophic and the available support to quickly recover
- the efficiency of environment for quicker deployment of skill building
- location and frequency of exposure to things that optimize chemicals in your brain that influence clarity, focus and happiness
-access to separate spaces to limit context switching and increase deep work/ skill building/fun with activities
- the speed of allocating time money or attention to solving problems for others rather than for yourself in the survival state
- general safety and avoidance of hostility to limit the frequency of permanent damages or violence
-better insurance
-cultural support
- the speed of assisting any forms of neurodiversity
- the speed at which ideas from different schools of thought can compound.
-speed of access to training / coaching
-exposure to people willing to make deals
-exposure to severely traumatized people that cause great detours in life
-Muscle development
None of this sells though.
People like being told everything is their fault. Its a way to feel empowered to change circumstances as a model that tends to work sometimes.
The caveat being that its way too painful to realize the exponential negative cost of things I mentioned above not working in the persons favor.
Suffering building character or strength I feel has been disproved countless times. Success or even just being a normie depends completely outside of suffering I've noticed.
I understand genetic determinism so easily when people say they “love” food. I merely like food, have a sweet tooth, really enjoy sushi, etc. but I can go without anything nice or even anything substantial for long periods. I have a fast metabolism too and that’s only exacerbated by the fact I can barely eat anything for days and feel perfectly fine. Then I have friends who are fat or chubby and love to eat. “Loving to eat” is beyond me. I’d love to eat sushi all the time but loving to eat in general is not something I experience. Then again there are things I simply “love” and cannot do without that my friends don’t understand either. However when it comes to food it seems to me this desire is so basic and primal that everyone should feel the same about it and to think there are people out there (and I’ve seen them) who can regularly scarf down two plates of food and still be hungry is so incredibly interesting.
I've found that lots of people seem to know what I should be doing...but rarely take their own advice.
In the end we are all just “Passing through”
A lot of people have unrealistic expectations and ideas on how you can improve your life, they think their advice or self-help will work with everybody’s flaws, issues and limitations. The thing that they fail to realize is that that’s not how human beings work, I agree that you can’t just sit back and do nothing about what you have or about the problems you got. But if they cannot try to understand a person’s personal circumstances or situation, and they’re giving them useless advice that doesn’t help them, then what is the point of even listening to them? That’s why I don’t give people advice anymore to them, everyone should figure out what’s best for them and what works for them. If it works out for you, then that’s great. More power to you. Unless if it’s a person that has down syndrome, physically disabled or has a mental disability or some form of autism. That’s when I think it’s a little different, they might need some help and I think that’s okay. Some people need to understand that the whole Jordan Peterson-esque “Clean your room” advice might not help everybody who’s in a bad circumstance or situation.
I’m a black woman who is an antinatalist and promortalist. I am so happy to not have a child. My proudest achievement is that when I leave this world I can take pride in knowing that I NEVER subjected anyone to this hell.
A view I share also. Good luck to you in all your endeavors:)
Well said. I won't play the genetic lottery with another human life.
a fellow AN! wish you all the best for the future
THANK GOD YOURE NOT BREEDING ANOTHER THUG
Cope
Any self-improvement you do cannot raise your hand. What it can do is give you an advantage over others with the same hand. That is all. (playing your hand) Billie can have the best diet and regimen ever, stick to it with all his might, and he will never be Chad. That is the truth.
Thanks for saying truths. A lot of the criticism comes from outside actually. Left alone, a person will come to term with their situation. It's outside expectation that's the problem. Those expectations are a constant undertone which others use to gain advantage. I'm not just talking the gurus, even loved ones are counting on you from a young age to fulfill some dream in their mind they made up. I'm also not saying expectations in of themselves are bad, just the ones in the cultural zeitgeist we have nowadays are toxic. It use to be contribute what you can, since their was a general recognition that most everyone struggles to get by. Now the message is you need to be a superhero. Going on a tangent, this message has infected women the worst, not just in causing harm to themselves but also by putting their expectations of other people out of whack. I'm not saying this is strictly a female thing either but they do tend to be more contentious over all as a group. There is too much specific dictating from above, or from the aether, about how to live our lives. Eat healthy, be active, learn something... Ok. Try to look like Chris Evans in a year... Too specific... and unrealistic. Don't listen to these idiots trying to "motivate" you because they're motivated nothing other than their own desire to prove something to the world. "Influencers" are a blight, the modern snake oil salesman.
Great point!
I think you are blessed with a deep voice suitable for dispensing wisdom on RUclips.
while yes it does matter, its important to WORK with it. you may not have the best hand but you can make the most of it. not to mention there are better hands that were played terribly, like people born into wealth and squandered it or people who relied too much on their looks and didnt put anything into anything else.
@Divergent_Integral it is. I myself have adhd and for the first 23years of my life I played terribly. The reason being I tried playing my hand the way everyone else played, now I play my OWN way and I’m doing better than others with inherently better hands. But it depends from person to person really
It doesn't matter if you work with it because the most of it is a different ceiling for everyone and floor. People with better hands that played terribly arguably had a bad hand in not being able to deal with.
often the hand you were given is so insanely bad that 'making the most of it' is still terrible. you cant even imagine how much bad luck some people have dealt with
@@bst800 oh I know. Life is like that. Still, it’s better to make the most of what you get. It’s better to work towards a terrible life than do nothing and have a horrendous one. The point of life is to work to at least suffer a little less.
@@MrOdaddy2011 that’s life, unfair. It’s meant to be. Does that mean I’ll throw up my hand in the air and say “I give up, you win?” No, I’ll still play. And one thing that most don’t consider is comparing. If you compare your life to say a billionaire then yes you’ll feel terrible. Comparison is the thief of joy, if you’re happy with your mediocre hand then who cares if other hands are better or worse?
No need to apologize Mr. Ape. I'm shocked at how similar our journeys are with weights/exercise/insomnia. Not one person I have ever met can comprehend why I've been suffering for so long. It's comforting to that at least one other person on earth can understand what we have been going through. I'm 45 btw. Did the same exact thing in the beginning reading the magazines and trying to copy those outrageous bodybuilding routines.
theres one thing I've noticed with people who are super jacked if they work a regular job they don't tend to be very jacked but if they have a basketball court sized living room with multiple floors no job and their attending uni they tend to be jacked because of all the time they have and the lack of pressure in their day to day and thus are comfortable enough to flourish in the gym similar to why artists that tend to make money more often than not are women because most of the time don't feel outside pressure to get a job or can get a man to take care of them vs a guy having to get off the ground faster because of responsibility falling on them much quicker
This is perhaps the most important step towards happiness. Once you accept what you can't have, the suffering you cannot avoid and discover your strengths and what brings you happiness, you can find your place in the world and happiness.
Superb video. Ironically, very motivational. This insight is a gift to us all.
Great talk! I've been really blessed in life and am aware of those blessings.
At 23, I was diagnosed with Crohn's disease. It explained a lot about things that happened in the past. Since then, for the past 24 years, I've had some really hard times. I realize that I will never be able to do all the things I would like, but I still do what I can to the best of my abilities. I just try to adjust to make the best of it.
Try not to take the judgment/advice of/from others who haven't been through the things you have to seriously.
Or you censor the crap out of people and ban the internet until a REAL ID biometric login system is made.
There is a chart called the standard deviation. If you can understand what this means and apply it to your life, thoughts and understanding about your life and that of everyone else, it can provide answers that are in direct correlation to what was said in this video. Remember to be average is still better than 50% of the population. Only 0.1% are ever going to be at the very top of any endeavor. That is the way it always works out.
I cringe whenever I hear, “…and if I can do it, anybody can.” Great video. The compassion piece as well.
I'm autistic. It's a limitation in some ways and a gift in others, to me.
Instead of saying "I'm autistic" try "I've been blessed with the 'tism".
This doesn't change anything, but framing it this way is amusing to me.
@@ordinaryhuman5645 Or "the burgers"
@@ordinaryhuman5645 LOL
I learned long ago that the hand you were dealt was more important than how you play them. A sub5 male can moneymax, jestermax, etc and still not get the girl that chad could get just by existing because he was dealt a good hand in terms of genetics. Thus his dating life will always be better than a sub5 even if he's rich.
Strengths: Tall, 120+ IQ, observeant
Weakenesses: fat, poor impulse control, obsessive with hobby, perfectionism.
I love how you always pick on Chad Williamson 😂. Stay functional brother Ape.
At this point that his name and I will not refer to him by any other name lol
Chad Williamson has worked hard to build his podcast etc no doubt about it & well done to him. Let's face it though, he wouldn't be a nightclub promoter, on that love island show & have the all opportunities etc if he wasn't a 9.5/10 looks wise.
Good looking people like to convince themselves & whoevers listening that their success was down to hard work etc as they don't like to admit to themselves their it was in massive part due to their looks.
Yeah he's had to walk through the door so to speak, but with his looks, the door was literally off it's hinges. For most average looking ppl, they could work much harder & not even catch a glimpse of the door.
The opportunity & social situations that you can both create & that are gifted to you is massive when you're a chad. There's a chad in my social group & I've seen 1st hand the difference it can make...& he's lazy. It's literally unbelievable, almost a superpower.
@@travis3430 Yep, If he was born with DBDR or BlackPillGoerge face he would be typing here in comment section xD
“Just be confident bro”
A man’s got to know his limitations
-Clint Eastwood
clint Eastwood was a chad his whole life, trust me, he couldn't understand people like us
A wise man once said "it is what it is"
That's defeatism and cope.
@@AnimeArchaeologist it is what it is
@@Allthepills Why cope? Why be a defeatist?
@@AnimeArchaeologist it is what it is
@@zz-if1ic how is it not defeatist cope?
"Know your own essence and you will know the essence of everything." ... Self Awareness is a challenge. It requires honest Self Introspection. Self Awareness is the only possible path of Transcendence.
There is a big difference between having a few beers every now and then and being a full-blown alcoholic.
Drinking does not mean being dependent on alcohol.
It's unbearably difficult to play around this all the time. I am the example of the guy who likes eating and litterally balloons at the slightest falloff
No bullshit I've gotta stay under 800 cals a day otherwise I just keep gaining weight.
Assuming you're not lying like the thousands of other physics-defying fatties whose bodies somehow negate the laws of thermodynamics, you need to get your thyroid and your T checked asap my friend.
Did you try avoiding sneed oils? Not all calories are created equal.
800 calories seems way too less to gain weight, even for someone just sitting all day. Are you sure about your calories? Not trying to ridicule but a lot of people mistake their calorie intake.
I feel your pain, I can look at a chocolate bar and gain weight
I'm young and was forced to quit cold turkey as i was a drug addict, smoker and drinker and was on the brink of death in a poor neighborhood. It WASN'T EASY and can admit that that some people definitely need help, we all need to be aware of our strengths and weaknesses for sure.
It could not always be better, but things can always be worse
This topic is related to what people do within Esports. It's about improving your weakest traits and abilities at every corner. And eventually, your weaknesses become your strengths OR your new baseline as a whole. Meaning that, trough self mastery, now you will have other weaknesses instead which need to be taken care of. And that's how the cycle goes around. Many won't know about this in general, so good vid. Cheers 👍
Self-awareness and acknowledging of one's limitations can grant you the sympathy, compassion, and patience to contend with the ignobility of others and oneself, especially if you subscribe to the deterministic model.
I'm frankly astounded with the content you produce with your insomnia weighing upon you, Stardusk.
Tell me what deterministic model means. I'm sincerely needing new information
@@richardbrown8269 It's the philosophical debate between Free Will (individual autonomy and agency) vs determinism (that there is no free will, everything, including people are just a systems of causality).
Stardusk is on the deterministic side of things, as am I. Free will doesn't actually make any sense when you get right down to the science behind it all, it's just a powerful feeling we have about ourselves and others. Exploring determinism was probably the largest paradigm shift of thought I've ever encountered but in my estimation it doesn't come with any downsides, it relieves a lot of anxiety for one's self and about others.
Sam Harris has a few episodes of his podcast about the topic (some are on YT) and he's written a book about it that's pretty quick to read or listen to.
@@Richie_Godsil I'm a chronic insomniac for decades. Well first I wanna say I appreciate the response. I didn't know what it was called but I find it fascinating that what you explained I more or less think n believe but didn't have a modality to put it in. Understanding is satisfying. 😐
@@richardbrown8269 You're welcome
They still won't get it.
American culture keeps telling us that your race, culture, religion, and tribe don't matter. All that matters is Americanism and determination. Not really. You are born into a race and culture, and most people will find it very difficult to be all that accepted by other races. I'm an Asian guy surrounded by whites and Mexicans, and I've just accepted that I probably never will really fit in all that well into their groups, and I will at best have "just OK-ish" relationships with them. I probably never will be able to have a great romantic relationship with people of other races.
As an Indian born and raised in the west I couldn’t agree more. This whole system is just flawed and broken. There are many people like us in this society, you aren’t alone
@@Rob_479 I never said the system was flawed and broken. I said that's just how it works. I don't go out of my way to invite other races and cultures into my social circle either. I go to an Asian church on Sundays, I don't go to random churches.
Heck, Asian women don't even date Asian men.
I know a kid, the step son of a multi millionaire. The dad is a money printing machine, self made. I think about this kid who now works for his dad and think man, the training, knowledge, and wisdom he will be receiving is more precious than ANY college he could possibly attend.
And I think about what I could have become with similar guidance. And about the genetic and cultural upbringing I had and what a drastic difference that made in my life, not for the good. I'm not a criminal, unlike some of my genetic heritage. Arguably the best of my family tree. But so much left on the table because of terribly inadequate parenting. I'm more circumspect than bitter about it. It is what it is and I accept that. But I am highly cynical about life and ultimately what a waste of time it all is.
Being capable enough to know how to play is part of the hands that you're dealt.
One of your very best, most insightful videos. Great work here.
You're best video in a long time.
One of the hardest things for me to accept, was my limitations... and understanding that normies will never understand that..
"Just buy $100 pheromone tactical soap, bra."
I'm really good at one thing. Not being good at things.
Fantastic video. Everyone needs a reminder now and then the things that bother them the most in their lives are more often times than not a direct result of circumstances outside of their control i.e. genes and environment.
Very well said, a lot of people are walking around without any real insight on people's situations. They only see what's on the surface.
"Some results" are always better than no results.
I've noticed that watching too many "improvement" videos has left me feeling anxious and like I never do enough to improve.
So I've been cutting back on that.
There is a term for that in the self improvement space it’s called action faker. You just read and learn but never do and apply or very little.
Also they found out vis the ACE study that bad childhood can cause you to develop cptsd, greatly affecting your hand. Learn about it
Excellent video! Thanks very much for honesty and sincerity.
I just want to say I love you, man. You say many things that resonate with me in a profound way.
I heard a quote similar.
"No one gets to choose the hand they are dealt, but everyone gets a choice in how they play it."
Your choice of your ability to play your hand is determined by the very hand you have been dealt.
@@thinking-ape6483 exactly. IQ for starters.
@@thinking-ape6483 exactly, it's hard to 'play your hand' when you are debilitated by countless GENETIC mental illnesses, low IQ, health problems etc etc
Choice is an illusion
Very helpful video. It's not just the gurus, it's manosphereian content that just ascribes blame to men for 'laziness' as the sole factor in their lack of success. Even prominent MGTOW pundits who I won't name names do this, one well known in particular. It destroys any value in everything else they might be saying that is valid or might be otherwise helpful. OK, ___(name redacted) you are the one man in the world who isn't lazy, and your genes aren't the main reason you've managed to amass such wealth, sure. Fantastic video Stardusk. Please never die my friend, or at least merge with the AIs so that we can continue to enjoy your perspective long after your meat suit has left this awful world.
Appreciate that you are still around Lord of Wisconsin.
Yup.
There’s no escape from the beginning of things.
If incarnations is true, we are given,what we gave in the previous life... or life is just a random hand dealing wild cards...
Im 52, fairly fit, and i started using the "chi running" jogging technique for a couple years now...using zero-drop type sneakers...(its very low impact style jogging) i think this technique really works because my knees + hips are still good 🤞🤞🤞 does also help me sleep but everyone is different.
Do you have flat feet?
@@Ergeniz no sir
@@Ergeniz I also have flat feet, got to wear insoles. Sucks.
@@thinking-ape6483 The irony is I possess the mental discipline to maintain a running regime, but recently due to age + flat feet I am forced to reconsider continuing. I am looking into some running shoes with arc support to possibly help with this problem.
@@Ergeniz The flat feet is from wearing shoes, especially arch support. You need to hike barefoot all summer and try to wear minimalist shoes in the winter, along with toe spacers at home, and doing basic foot, ankle, and balance exercises.