I wish I would have had some good advice as a teen from a small Christian town. I got pregnant young and married a guy in the army at 18. We divorced when I was 25. I had no clue what life could be like because there was nothing in my small town to experience aside from marriage and children. I’m 34 now and I take my daughter to tons of shows and she is the goth girl I always wanted to be when I was a teen I just wasn’t allowed to be. I want so much more from life for her. I want her to be a kid and love being a kid. I grew up too fast.
The worst thing that can happen: Someone who you don't want in your life anymore actually hitting it off with your friends. But I also think the best thing that happened for you is that your style was so different from his at that point, because that just reinforces the idea that it's actually over and there's no chance for him to ever be with you again. Also kinda reminds me of the "dudes want a goth gf while dressing like this" meme.
As utterly surreal is the entire situation was, I'm really glad that they hit it off. I couldn't have imagined they'd hit it off so well but it's so crazy to see two worlds collide like that. It would have been a nightmare if they didn't get along.
I really can't say enough how interesting and enjoyable all the stuff you talk about is. It feels like your someone whom has lived 200 years of experiences.
I wanted to tell you that I saw The Cure (my first “goth” concert), and omg they were amazing. It may seem silly, but I think I’ve changed since seeing them live it was such a beautiful experience- they performed for almost 3 hours! I met an elder goth too- she kind of did a friendly inquisition you mention- asking me how I found out about The Cure and mentioning some other bands she had seen, seeing if I knew them. I also made a friend! We wanted to dance but no one in our section had gotten up (we had seats) but when A Forest came on, we looked at each other and knew we had to get up!There’s a goth night where next Friday, and my friend and I are gonna try and make it. I’m so excited, thanks for sharing so much about the subculture! Now that I’m older I can’t wait to get more involved and create more memories 🖤
It was insane to watch. The 2 most serious relationships I'd had from 2 different lives...The golf pro/marine and the goth at the Batcave. Having a bromance.
I very much needed this advice. Im 27 now and in that chaotic situation where i dont know where to go and what to do. And yeah i honestly have been thinking about getting in touch with my past and checking how people are doing - so i guess i'll put that on hold lol
It's so easy to make that connection. When things are crap in the present is like our brains try to revert back to a time when shit wasn't so sucky. Reach out to old friends to see how their doing is almost like a factory reset.
You are an excellent storyteller Angela! I always really enjoy hearing about your past experiences and the lessons you have learned from them. You are so self aware and self reflective. I'm glad that you are in a good place after everything you've been through 🖤
Thank you. I got so much stuff crammed inside this brain, it feels good to share. You never know whose in a similar boat to where you were at the time and needs to hear it. It's also pretty amusing - "A Goth and A Golfer/A-Wall Marine walk into the Batcave"...
That story was surreal!! Thank goodness that now we have both social media and the internet available to legally look up people in peace 😂!! We are close in age Angela, and yes I'm glad I don't have those old ties too.
You are the only person that I could relate to when it comes to drinking. I always tell people that I really don’t like drinking because I don’t like feeling the lack of control
Just watched this and I really needed this advice bc my family is so chaotic rn. I feel all alone dealing with a lot of things, but this gave me a lot of positive energy. Thank you so much for your videos. ❤
I'm really sorry that you're feeling so alone at the moment. I'm glad this video helps you. There are so many people out there going through much the same. Just remember, friends are the family you choose.
@@angelabenedict good health, sister. I completely forgot to say about piercing and makeup. They are great too. Condolences about the father and other losses.🙏 May I know your attitude towards death? What do you think awaits in the other world?
@@RBDOMIKE Thank you 🖤 I think death is by design. We're little afterlife architects and don't even know it. Everything we love from people (real and fictional), landscapes, food, scenes from our favorite films and music and all being put together to create the most exhilarating eternity.
Thanks for sharing Angela , I always enjoy your storytimes. That was a top one . I agree with you to " better regret of something that you did rather than didnt do" . Indeed some of our hardships in our lives can lead us to where we are now .
Speaking of sea changes in the goth scene, I remember two major shifts in L.A. The first happened in 96/97. Goth became secondary and everything went EBM/Industrial. Cutoff Dickies and 20-hole Docs became the standard dress code.People stopped wearing make-up to the clubs. The second major shift occurred around 07. Everything went Steam Punk, leaving me to wonder what the hell Steam Punk was when I would see people dressed as extras from Pirates of the Caribbean. That latter phase lasted for only about 3-4 years here--thankfully. I'm still not sure what that 1920s-Mount Everest-climber-and-giant-goggles nonsense was all about.
This is why I love your channel so much because it’s 100% relatable to my life! We are exactly the same age and I too, was living in a very small city in Florida in the 90s. I was also 13 totally in love with my boyfriend at the who was 15 and I was also a Normie back then. A few years later, I also discovered the goth scene and then met my boyfriend at the time in a goth club and we were together for 17 years, we also never argued and he treated me very well but at the end of the day the chemistry for us was just not there. Now I am still in the goth scene. Listen to the music daily and dress goth but now my husband is actually a Normie lol. The best part is though he accepts me for who I am. I’m a goth mom who previously commented how I thought I had to be “normal” once I became a mom. I’ll definitely never change who I am ever again. Thank you for sharing your story 🖤
Thanks for sharing. We aren't that far in age and experience and this video will help a lot of our young baby bats understand that things can get real really fast but, there is light at the end of that crazy tunnel. Thanks for the QXTs mention, it's my home club. 🖤💜🖤
It was crazy to witness. I remember he came up to me and said 'Ang, I love him! He reminds me of my brother!' He thinks his brother is one of the most hilarious people he knows.
I lost my dad when I was 17, so very early as well. I went from one relationship to another being not aware that I was simply afraid of being alone. Finally I took the step because my last relationship being violent with a narcissistic person. It was the best decision ever and finally I was able to build up a true relationship being not based on feeling alone. We are now 10years together and every day is better than the day before.
Hearing your real and raw life experiences brings me catharsis in my life walk right now as a 25 yr old feeling lost in some kind of purgatory. I'm just shell shocked learning that you lived through 9/11 and recounting the absolute social distortion from the aftermath sort've filled in my gaps of understanding as to how our culture as whole ended up the way it is today as I was too young or wasnt even born yet in that era. Just wow, thank you for baring your soul, your experiences are priceless.
I can relate too much. Tried to drag some friends from my past to our local club. It went totally south. There was a mental breakdown, a lot of blood. And in the end a betrayal. I lost a good many friends that day
I'm happy for you that even with all you have gone through, you came out on the other side a strong and still beautiful person :) I'm still going thru things & learning. Fortunately for me, even though I made the same mistake of trying to contact a few exes, they didn't want to talk to me. I wish I lived somewhere that I could mingle with people I feel comfortable with who are like me. Take care Sweetie
Thank you :) It sounds like you dodged a few bullets there. Revisiting communication with an ex after a protracted period rarely results in anything good...Been there and sadly done that. Are you not in an area with alternative people?
@@angelabenedict yes I have dodged a few. No I haven’t lived near alternative people ever. It’s very lonely and I’m hoping to move this year someplace where I can meet some.
I would love to see you vlog and show the goth culture in your everyday life. I've always loved the fashion but when I was a teen I wasn't able to learn to express my self and figure out who I was because my parents (mainly my mom) was very anti goth saying that their sadists and represents evil and no matter how much I argued that, that wasn't the case and a misconception it just didn't matter. So now at 28 married with 2 kids and hoping to have more, I want to see more and learn more and just try to figure out my style. I want to feel more confident and comfortable with who I am. And not fight what I like.
Good on ya for the str8 edge thing! Very many Goths, Deathrockers, Darkwavers have been highly into Drugs and Party Culture over 40 years...and too many are no longer with us.
Also can't believe Q is still around. I've actually never been because the drive is too much for a night (I'm in CT) but I heard for a long time that was the best night in the area.
I mean, we've all been through some odd periods in our lives. It's not so much what you do in the moment but your perspective on your choices/behavior in hindsight that count.
I love hearing your stories. I can relate with making things more complicated than they have to be. I definitely needed to hear about being at full capacity regarding bandwidth, I'm at the point right now so thank you for the reminder. 😊
That was one hell of a story to be fair. When the girlfriend rang up and said she was pregnant it was phew get out of jail free card - then the kids not his and he's run away from the army - oh no!
Hi Angela! I really enjoy listening to you speak. Your presentations are wonderful. Your content is original and interesting. Thank you for sharing. Keep doing what you do.🤘🏼🍻🤠♠️🚂😸
angela you've always been such a great and vivid storyteller! i have also learned my lesson from "checking in" with exes haha. usually never a good idea. the alternative scene in my area is not small but can be tight knit, and i tend to bump into people i knew from high school and like they know people i know currently and it's like some weird multiverse, like wow you guys know each other? and interacting with each other? such a strange feeling indeed
Thank you for sharing your story and yeah I could really relate I mean I grew up out in no where in Utah but still it felt like I understood what you went through. I'm happy that you're here and I'm thankful I found your channel. I wish someone talked like this to me long time ago and yes never ever reach out to your ex 😂 I love your make-up look.
I take it that you are at FULL CAPACITY currently then ??? Thanks for enlightening us with your past period in life, especially how your two exes bonding between two different worlds. I somehow missed information towards your current. Just wondering if you are the cause, or cure, for Summertime Sadness; another great vid of yours :)
The only person I’ve ever been truly in love with was my husband, so it’s always been weird to me when people, usually dudes, get obsessed with someone they dated in high school. I’ve dealt with that before. I’ve always had more trouble warming up to people than getting over them. I honestly thought I’d never get married when I was growing up, even though I got married pretty young. But I've had 2 guys whom I dated for 5 minutes get obsessed for years after.
Thank you so much for sharing this! Personally I never regret anything I did. How ever, even thou I shouldn't, I sometimes regret the path I didn't take. And really, not long I go (two weeks ago acually) I bumped into that "path"....totaly out of the blue. And even thou it was super wierd (the odds of us being at the same place allmost 25 years after we met last) and non of us are the same people anymore (I am definatly a better person) it really felt good and I did apologize, from the bottom of my heart, for how I treated that person. (I didn't see it at that point of our lives, but I was really so full of my selfe, that I didn't see this, fantastic, kind and over all awsome guy he was). He did forgive me, he had a long time ago. We are now on the path of cultivate a really good freind ship....or not...who knows. Him and I will never be in a romantic situation, but I will really cherish a freindship this time.,..if it will come to that.
@@angelabenedict It is a wierd thing. Never did I expect the norns to reconnect our life threads, but they did. (And really, this person and my husband got along really good)
Always loved hear you talk about your old days. Even if it's not about a perfect Goth life. Must admit there is people I wonder who they are today. But I have never been in contact with anyone. 2003-2010 was probably my best years with a living goth scene. I am happy that your club scene is great. And hope you had a great time. Love you in that red look too. Stay safe gorgeous Angela 🦇🖤🖤🖤🖤🦇
CPTSD is a crazy thing. When you have people who are affected by trauma, we get eerily calm and collected in fucked up situations but panic over minor things. Once the calm came years later, this whole situation hit me like a ton of bricks.
Just turned 30 in April, I decided to no longer be that guy who has everyone else's back because I've realized that other people's fights are not mine to deal with. Weather the fights are within themselves or they pick em with other people.
Similar situations lived around that time. My ex and I were together when she was 16 and I was 18 at the time. we were together for 2 plus years and one of her friends lie about me being with her. Of course, the situation went bad because, at the time, I was into trust heavily. I understood he was her friend and believed her but not me. This was in the 90s, we lost contact a year later we try back again but i felt things change. We split. 6 year later my grand mother told me she was there looking for me, but what can I do I was married at the time so, there was no way i can be with her. I always been into the goth scene still this day im still, my wife passed away and well between new england to california and now new york i think what would happen if we gotten back. I feel you there Angela.
Looking at the two pics there, I'm like "That's not a huge difference - pretty girl grew up to be an elegant young goth woman. That happens. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ "
Very much relate to not wanting to drink alco/use drugs because you've seen some crap as a kid and don't want it in your life anymore. I only started drinking closer to 30, and only because I'm socially anxious and a couple of drinks make me more relaxed and sociable when I'm with people. I have a couple of friends who are way younger than me that I go to concerts with and they use drugs and I honesty hate it but I also know if I start preaching to them about it I'll be just a grumpy killjoy granny and they won't listen 😕
Hi Angela, I just found your channel cause I wanted to be a part of the Goth subculture for a long time. I am a huge metal fan, with usual black clothes, spiky wristbands, black jacket, you know. And I got interested in Goths not a long time ago, cuz I love how dark it is, and now I'm looking deep into it, do you have a video or something where you talk about, or explain just simply how to meet Goth people? I really just feel lonely and Social media isn't helping me in this way.
@@angelabenedict A little bit (The Cure, Bauhaus, Frank the Baptist, Specimen, just to name a few), I am still new and researching, even now. There are so much playlists on spotify and on youtube.
Normally I don't watch these videos but for some reason I did for 10 minutes this morning, then I started to loose the will to live and had to turn it off. I think as I've become older my outlook has become so much more simple and I try not to overly complicate things... You know what? I'm the happiest I've ever been. The subculture doesn't define me, I define myself. :)
This video gave me PTSD flashbacks of when one of my psycho exes decided to RIDE A BIKE from brooklyn to montauk to see me just because i accepted his fb friend request. it's crazy what these people would do. sidenote the red lace top is gorgeous!
I don't usually comment on how people look, but your outfit and style is spooky and awesome. I just finished watching a Japanese movie and your lace blouse is giving off oriental vampire vibes. Very cool. You made a great point, when stressed, don't add more. One day, when i can travel, i will do so and i will remember your talks. I hope your week is a good one. Happy 4th of July. 🎇🎆🎇🎆🎇🙂
Yes! We have one too, it's not the same though. Remember when we'd have a power outage and our phones still worked? I mean provided your phone wasn't a cordless.
Well in that case I am not going to have any relationship 🙃 because I have social anxiety but to many ex's you have me I never had to say my ex my ex my ex because I never had a girlfriend I always suffered from depression, anxiety , low self of esteem and alot of woman ain't worth it nowadays either so
Time,now,seems to be speeding-up(unlike that 3-4 Month period with clinical-depression,where Time was just "taking its time" and it just seemed to be sliwing-down!!! Until my anti-depressant medication kicked in ,maybe 3 zmonths ...after i visitted the Hospital...z-months...i felt like a zombie,especially with medication i'd Never taken before...)
Man. The first relationship mentioned reminds me a lot of what is going on with my current relationship. We've been together for almost 8 years. But we're grown! We're in our 30s. No kids, not married. He's kind of "normie" too. Not country like the Florida guy -- we actually live in Florida, lol -- and he actually hates golf and is irreligious (lol), but yeah, more normie compared to me and not part of the goth scene. (I personally don't consider myself goth btw. I guess I'm more alt/"darkly inclined"? I am very much part of the scene, however, and have been part of it since my teens. My boyfriend is cool with it but isn't really a participant.)
i love how anti-"and-they-all-lived-happily-ever-after" the ending is. it's like, yep, this was fucking weird, he's gone now thank god and life goes on lool
You are the older goth sister I wish I had growing up. I love hearing your life stories your way of conveying baby bat shit crazy stories is absolutely exemplary 🖤🦇. Many can be very forlorn when they try tell their baby bat past stories.
My advice is simply retain those fond memories of your past, but never dig them up for extra curiosity. look back with smiles and gratitude, look forward with a stern look and clenched fists 😺
@@angelabenedict thankfully mental clumsiness is something we all fade out from as we grow older and wiser, but I fear social media has extended that time and let it grow to full blown stupidity.
Oh man! What a story. Relatable on many levels. You should have worn your Offspring t-shirt. Every now and then the corpo-weasles get a hold of the cultural strands and water them down and sanitize them enough to be safe for mass consumption until it's exhausted. Then the culture can have time to recover and get healthy again in an organic sort of way. Sounds like NYC is back. Thank you for the story and all. Your husband I dare say is one of your best decisions. Cheers.
Ever hear a jingle from an old commercial or something that you totally forgotten about from when you were a child and start to skeptically sing along wondering where in your brain this thing was hidden?
@@evgraph_polycarpovich Saturday came around and I knew I wanted to go to the Batcave, I had plans to go with my one ex and I figured, what better buffer do We need for this nightmare then the bat cave!
Love you're intelligent videos angela you deserve a loving relationship you are a loving lovable woman you have been through so much interesting video you are an interesting person
Do you think New York becoming corporate after the attack on the WTC led to the co-option of alternative culture by big corporations and the state, or was this just an acceleration of the process set in motion in the previous decade?
As a C-Squat, ABC affiliated GutterGoth who lived on 6th and C in a black, green, and purple Ford farmtruck van with a Travel-girl and my homie Grim, I can weigh in and say it is both. Been progressing for many years before 911, but that event accelerated things very much. Ain't no C-Squatters feeding at LA Plaza in Losaida with crowds of every Alt imaginable breaking bread with street thugs, wastoid junkies, Homebums, Skinheads...whoever was hungry...not popsicle now AT ALL. I was in ATL making almost yuppie level money with my wife...Goth as it gets, but I saw the major shift on 911...felt it distinctly...and ALL culture rapidly changed, not just Alt or Goth.
My blindass thought the thumbnail was a crossword puzzle.
Now you kinda make me wish it was!
Mine too 😆
Same 😅
Same, lol
Lol same 😂
I wish I would have had some good advice as a teen from a small Christian town. I got pregnant young and married a guy in the army at 18. We divorced when I was 25. I had no clue what life could be like because there was nothing in my small town to experience aside from marriage and children. I’m 34 now and I take my daughter to tons of shows and she is the goth girl I always wanted to be when I was a teen I just wasn’t allowed to be. I want so much more from life for her. I want her to be a kid and love being a kid. I grew up too fast.
The worst thing that can happen: Someone who you don't want in your life anymore actually hitting it off with your friends. But I also think the best thing that happened for you is that your style was so different from his at that point, because that just reinforces the idea that it's actually over and there's no chance for him to ever be with you again. Also kinda reminds me of the "dudes want a goth gf while dressing like this" meme.
As utterly surreal is the entire situation was, I'm really glad that they hit it off. I couldn't have imagined they'd hit it off so well but it's so crazy to see two worlds collide like that. It would have been a nightmare if they didn't get along.
“I love a good train wreck, right? Let’s see this thing through to the end.”
I really can't say enough how interesting and enjoyable all the stuff you talk about is. It feels like your someone whom has lived 200 years of experiences.
Oh, boy. We got more to come. I don't know how my brain holds it all.
She kinda has, and is far prettier than me or King Cobra JFS, let alone less fried by habits than any GutterGoth.
I wanted to tell you that I saw The Cure (my first “goth” concert), and omg they were amazing. It may seem silly, but I think I’ve changed since seeing them live it was such a beautiful experience- they performed for almost 3 hours! I met an elder goth too- she kind of did a friendly inquisition you mention- asking me how I found out about The Cure and mentioning some other bands she had seen, seeing if I knew them. I also made a friend! We wanted to dance but no one in our section had gotten up (we had seats) but when A Forest came on, we looked at each other and knew we had to get up!There’s a goth night where next Friday, and my friend and I are gonna try and make it. I’m so excited, thanks for sharing so much about the subculture! Now that I’m older I can’t wait to get more involved and create more memories 🖤
That's amazing news! It sounds like a magical night.
When you said that your exes were vibing my mouth hit the floor. I was NOT expecting that. 😂😂😂
It was insane to watch. The 2 most serious relationships I'd had from 2 different lives...The golf pro/marine and the goth at the Batcave. Having a bromance.
I very much needed this advice. Im 27 now and in that chaotic situation where i dont know where to go and what to do. And yeah i honestly have been thinking about getting in touch with my past and checking how people are doing - so i guess i'll put that on hold lol
It's so easy to make that connection. When things are crap in the present is like our brains try to revert back to a time when shit wasn't so sucky. Reach out to old friends to see how their doing is almost like a factory reset.
Watching an old live stream from Angela and then this notification pops up! My lucky day
An Angela video gets uploaded and my mood instantly improves and my headache suddenly disappears without a trace 🖤
I'm happy to hear that! I hope you like this one.
You are an excellent storyteller Angela! I always really enjoy hearing about your past experiences and the lessons you have learned from them. You are so self aware and self reflective. I'm glad that you are in a good place after everything you've been through 🖤
Thank you. I got so much stuff crammed inside this brain, it feels good to share. You never know whose in a similar boat to where you were at the time and needs to hear it. It's also pretty amusing - "A Goth and A Golfer/A-Wall Marine walk into the Batcave"...
I love your "storytimes". It's like sitting on the couch with a good friend and a cup of tea and just reminiscing.
🖤
Lady! That was one HELL of a trip to listen to!
Thanks for the post 😊
That story was surreal!! Thank goodness that now we have both social media and the internet available to legally look up people in peace 😂!! We are close in age Angela, and yes I'm glad I don't have those old ties too.
You are the only person that I could relate to when it comes to drinking. I always tell people that I really don’t like drinking because I don’t like feeling the lack of control
Not boring. Cities in dust 🤘🏻
Enjoyed this very much. Thank you
I was thinking that!
Just watched this and I really needed this advice bc my family is so chaotic rn. I feel all alone dealing with a lot of things, but this gave me a lot of positive energy. Thank you so much for your videos. ❤
I'm really sorry that you're feeling so alone at the moment. I'm glad this video helps you. There are so many people out there going through much the same. Just remember, friends are the family you choose.
Red jacket, bat and candles. 🐈 Nice!
Rocking the red!
@@angelabenedict good health, sister. I completely forgot to say about piercing and makeup. They are great too. Condolences about the father and other losses.🙏
May I know your attitude towards death? What do you think awaits in the other world?
@@RBDOMIKE Thank you 🖤 I think death is by design. We're little afterlife architects and don't even know it. Everything we love from people (real and fictional), landscapes, food, scenes from our favorite films and music and all being put together to create the most exhilarating eternity.
@@angelabenedict thought about your words. Today is a great day and we are still breathing. 🌞 Gratitude.
Thanks for sharing Angela , I always enjoy your storytimes. That was a top one .
I agree with you to " better regret of something that you did rather than didnt do" . Indeed some of our hardships in our lives can lead us to where we are now .
Speaking of sea changes in the goth scene, I remember two major shifts in L.A. The first happened in 96/97. Goth became secondary and everything went EBM/Industrial. Cutoff Dickies and 20-hole Docs became the standard dress code.People stopped wearing make-up to the clubs. The second major shift occurred around 07. Everything went Steam Punk, leaving me to wonder what the hell Steam Punk was when I would see people dressed as extras from Pirates of the Caribbean. That latter phase lasted for only about 3-4 years here--thankfully. I'm still not sure what that 1920s-Mount Everest-climber-and-giant-goggles nonsense was all about.
This is why I love your channel so much because it’s 100% relatable to my life! We are exactly the same age and I too, was living in a very small city in Florida in the 90s. I was also 13 totally in love with my boyfriend at the who was 15 and I was also a Normie back then. A few years later, I also discovered the goth scene and then met my boyfriend at the time in a goth club and we were together for 17 years, we also never argued and he treated me very well but at the end of the day the chemistry for us was just not there. Now I am still in the goth scene. Listen to the music daily and dress goth but now my husband is actually a Normie lol. The best part is though he accepts me for who I am. I’m a goth mom who previously commented how I thought I had to be “normal” once I became a mom. I’ll definitely never change who I am ever again. Thank you for sharing your story 🖤
Thanks for sharing. We aren't that far in age and experience and this video will help a lot of our young baby bats understand that things can get real really fast but, there is light at the end of that crazy tunnel. Thanks for the QXTs mention, it's my home club. 🖤💜🖤
Wow this experience you shared kept me hooked. But I'm glad you enjoyed the goth subculture when you were in NY
Glad you enjoyed! It was such a weird time.
Angela, I was laughing so hard at the ex bromance. Of course some shit like that would happen to you lol! Anyway, you look amazing in all that red!
It was crazy to witness. I remember he came up to me and said 'Ang, I love him! He reminds me of my brother!' He thinks his brother is one of the most hilarious people he knows.
@@angelabenedict lol I bet that was wild
I lost my dad when I was 17, so very early as well. I went from one relationship to another being not aware that I was simply afraid of being alone. Finally I took the step because my last relationship being violent with a narcissistic person. It was the best decision ever and finally I was able to build up a true relationship being not based on feeling alone. We are now 10years together and every day is better than the day before.
Never give up your own personality and follow the path, that you chosed.
Hearing your real and raw life experiences brings me catharsis in my life walk right now as a 25 yr old feeling lost in some kind of purgatory. I'm just shell shocked learning that you lived through 9/11 and recounting the absolute social distortion from the aftermath sort've filled in my gaps of understanding as to how our culture as whole ended up the way it is today as I was too young or wasnt even born yet in that era.
Just wow, thank you for baring your soul, your experiences are priceless.
what a beautiful story, thanks 4 sharing that with us.
I can relate too much. Tried to drag some friends from my past to our local club. It went totally south. There was a mental breakdown, a lot of blood. And in the end a betrayal. I lost a good many friends that day
I'm happy for you that even with all you have gone through, you came out on the other side a strong and still beautiful person :) I'm still going thru things & learning. Fortunately for me, even though I made the same mistake of trying to contact a few exes, they didn't want to talk to me. I wish I lived somewhere that I could mingle with people I feel comfortable with who are like me. Take care Sweetie
Thank you :) It sounds like you dodged a few bullets there. Revisiting communication with an ex after a protracted period rarely results in anything good...Been there and sadly done that. Are you not in an area with alternative people?
@@angelabenedict yes I have dodged a few. No I haven’t lived near alternative people ever. It’s very lonely and I’m hoping to move this year someplace where I can meet some.
Thank you for sharing this with everyone I hope people learn something from this.
I would love to see you vlog and show the goth culture in your everyday life. I've always loved the fashion but when I was a teen I wasn't able to learn to express my self and figure out who I was because my parents (mainly my mom) was very anti goth saying that their sadists and represents evil and no matter how much I argued that, that wasn't the case and a misconception it just didn't matter. So now at 28 married with 2 kids and hoping to have more, I want to see more and learn more and just try to figure out my style. I want to feel more confident and comfortable with who I am. And not fight what I like.
Good on ya for the str8 edge thing! Very many Goths, Deathrockers, Darkwavers have been highly into Drugs and Party Culture over 40 years...and too many are no longer with us.
What's a life without a little drama ? Can't every day be a walk down a rose garden path. Live and learn. And you have. 🙂
oh the whirlwind! but honestly hearing Batcave mentioned brought back my own flood of memories.
Also can't believe Q is still around. I've actually never been because the drive is too much for a night (I'm in CT) but I heard for a long time that was the best night in the area.
I hate to admit it but that whole situation was far more relatable than it should be
I mean, we've all been through some odd periods in our lives. It's not so much what you do in the moment but your perspective on your choices/behavior in hindsight that count.
As soon as you said "Marine" I knew it was gonna go downhill...
🤣🤣🤣
I love hearing your stories. I can relate with making things more complicated than they have to be. I definitely needed to hear about being at full capacity regarding bandwidth, I'm at the point right now so thank you for the reminder. 😊
i loved your story thank you for sharing lol i’m not in the goth scene but i still like to watch your videos because they interest me regardless
Cheers, brother!🍻
Thank you so much!!
That was one hell of a story to be fair. When the girlfriend rang up and said she was pregnant it was phew get out of jail free card - then the kids not his and he's run away from the army - oh no!
Hi Angela! I really enjoy listening to you speak. Your presentations are wonderful. Your content is original and interesting. Thank you for sharing. Keep doing what you do.🤘🏼🍻🤠♠️🚂😸
angela you've always been such a great and vivid storyteller! i have also learned my lesson from "checking in" with exes haha. usually never a good idea. the alternative scene in my area is not small but can be tight knit, and i tend to bump into people i knew from high school and like they know people i know currently and it's like some weird multiverse, like wow you guys know each other? and interacting with each other? such a strange feeling indeed
Thank you for sharing your story and yeah I could really relate I mean I grew up out in no where in Utah but still it felt like I understood what you went through. I'm happy that you're here and I'm thankful I found your channel. I wish someone talked like this to me long time ago and yes never ever reach out to your ex 😂 I love your make-up look.
I take it that you are at FULL CAPACITY currently then ??? Thanks for enlightening us with your past period in life, especially how your two exes bonding between two different worlds. I somehow missed information towards your current. Just wondering if you are the cause, or cure, for Summertime Sadness; another great vid of yours :)
I have but a molecule to spare.
The only person I’ve ever been truly in love with was my husband, so it’s always been weird to me when people, usually dudes, get obsessed with someone they dated in high school. I’ve dealt with that before. I’ve always had more trouble warming up to people than getting over them. I honestly thought I’d never get married when I was growing up, even though I got married pretty young. But I've had 2 guys whom I dated for 5 minutes get obsessed for years after.
Thank you so much for sharing this!
Personally I never regret anything I did.
How ever, even thou I shouldn't, I sometimes regret the path I didn't take.
And really, not long I go (two weeks ago acually) I bumped into that "path"....totaly out of the blue.
And even thou it was super wierd (the odds of us being at the same place allmost 25 years after we met last) and non of us are the same people anymore (I am definatly a better person) it really felt good and I did apologize, from the bottom of my heart, for how I treated that person.
(I didn't see it at that point of our lives, but I was really so full of my selfe, that I didn't see this, fantastic, kind and over all awsome guy he was).
He did forgive me, he had a long time ago.
We are now on the path of cultivate a really good freind ship....or not...who knows.
Him and I will never be in a romantic situation, but I will really cherish a freindship this time.,..if it will come to that.
That's amazing. I'm happy that after all this time you were able to close a chapter and bring someone else peace.
@@angelabenedict It is a wierd thing.
Never did I expect the norns to reconnect our life threads, but they did.
(And really, this person and my husband got along really good)
And the moral of the story is "all things lead to Goth".
In some way or another, yes!
Always loved hear you talk about your old days. Even if it's not about a perfect Goth life.
Must admit there is people I wonder who they are today. But I have never been in contact with anyone.
2003-2010 was probably my best years with a living goth scene.
I am happy that your club scene is great. And hope you had a great time.
Love you in that red look too.
Stay safe gorgeous Angela 🦇🖤🖤🖤🖤🦇
Man, the title wasn't an exaggerated at all, this really made a bad situation worse, almost surreally so.
Oh, no. This was a 5 alarm cluster funk.
Sorry for the Loss of your Dad Angela 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
Angie, you seem to handle situations ok...rather good
CPTSD is a crazy thing. When you have people who are affected by trauma, we get eerily calm and collected in fucked up situations but panic over minor things. Once the calm came years later, this whole situation hit me like a ton of bricks.
She didn't make the common mistake of stacking substances on CPTSD. She will be like some Granny Goth Guru lady when I am ashes, lol, Gods Willing!
Just turned 30 in April, I decided to no longer be that guy who has everyone else's back because I've realized that other people's fights are not mine to deal with. Weather the fights are within themselves or they pick em with other people.
Thank you for the video.
I don't really believe love exists sometimes at all.Not sure if some people can understand that.
The experience depends on the person. It's different for everyone. I understand.
Similar situations lived around that time. My ex and I were together when she was 16 and I was 18 at the time. we were together for 2 plus years and one of her friends lie about me being with her. Of course, the situation went bad because, at the time, I was into trust heavily. I understood he was her friend and believed her but not me. This was in the 90s, we lost contact a year later we try back again but i felt things change. We split. 6 year later my grand mother told me she was there looking for me, but what can I do I was married at the time so, there was no way i can be with her. I always been into the goth scene still this day im still, my wife passed away and well between new england to california and now new york i think what would happen if we gotten back. I feel you there Angela.
Looking at the two pics there, I'm like "That's not a huge difference - pretty girl grew up to be an elegant young goth woman. That happens. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ "
Those chokers and embellished bodysuits were the thing back in 1993.
@@angelabenedict well, you went from fashionable to timeless, that's all I can say. Still slaying 30 years on, too.
By the sound of things, you've had a hard, hard life. I can only hope things are better now.
Very much relate to not wanting to drink alco/use drugs because you've seen some crap as a kid and don't want it in your life anymore. I only started drinking closer to 30, and only because I'm socially anxious and a couple of drinks make me more relaxed and sociable when I'm with people. I have a couple of friends who are way younger than me that I go to concerts with and they use drugs and I honesty hate it but I also know if I start preaching to them about it I'll be just a grumpy killjoy granny and they won't listen 😕
That red looks amazing on you Angela!
Thank you!
Sounds like avoiding accountability at the time.
Hi Angela, I just found your channel cause I wanted to be a part of the Goth subculture for a long time. I am a huge metal fan, with usual black clothes, spiky wristbands, black jacket, you know. And I got interested in Goths not a long time ago, cuz I love how dark it is, and now I'm looking deep into it, do you have a video or something where you talk about, or explain just simply how to meet Goth people? I really just feel lonely and Social media isn't helping me in this way.
With goth there's only one place to start and that's the music. Are you familiar with it?
@@angelabenedict A little bit (The Cure, Bauhaus, Frank the Baptist, Specimen, just to name a few), I am still new and researching, even now. There are so much playlists on spotify and on youtube.
Normally I don't watch these videos but for some reason I did for 10 minutes this morning, then I started to loose the will to live and had to turn it off. I think as I've become older my outlook has become so much more simple and I try not to overly complicate things... You know what? I'm the happiest I've ever been. The subculture doesn't define me, I define myself. :)
This video gave me PTSD flashbacks of when one of my psycho exes decided to RIDE A BIKE from brooklyn to montauk to see me just because i accepted his fb friend request. it's crazy what these people would do.
sidenote the red lace top is gorgeous!
Such a great storyteller....
Thank you!
I don't usually comment on how people look, but your outfit and style is spooky and awesome. I just finished watching a Japanese movie and your lace blouse is giving off oriental vampire vibes. Very cool. You made a great point, when stressed, don't add more. One day, when i can travel, i will do so and i will remember your talks. I hope your week is a good one. Happy 4th of July. 🎇🎆🎇🎆🎇🙂
Landlines are still around, but they're all digital now. Most of the old tricks to get free service (except collect calling) no longer work in The US.
Yes! We have one too, it's not the same though. Remember when we'd have a power outage and our phones still worked? I mean provided your phone wasn't a cordless.
Loving the red! It's a great color on youuu! You didn't make it worse! You made it groovier!
Well in that case I am not going to have any relationship 🙃 because I have social anxiety but to many ex's you have me I never had to say my ex my ex my ex because I never had a girlfriend I always suffered from depression, anxiety , low self of esteem and alot of woman ain't worth it nowadays either so
I'm loving that red lace top!
Thank you! It's a maxi dress - I got it from depop, it's made by depop.
Time,now,seems to be speeding-up(unlike that 3-4 Month period with clinical-depression,where Time was just "taking its time" and it just seemed to be sliwing-down!!! Until my anti-depressant medication kicked in ,maybe 3 zmonths ...after i visitted the Hospital...z-months...i felt like a zombie,especially with medication i'd Never taken before...)
Love the red BTW. all ya need now is a black cape with purple on the inside 😸
Hmmm, *adds to shopping list*
Girl that's crazy
Sometimes you just have to say screw it, I'm 50% of the way there anyway. May as well complete the journey and go full insanity.
What’s the song in the background?? I love it!🖤
I always put the songs in the description to the videos so people can discover new music 🖤
@@angelabenedict ahh! Thank you🖤
Man. The first relationship mentioned reminds me a lot of what is going on with my current relationship. We've been together for almost 8 years. But we're grown! We're in our 30s. No kids, not married. He's kind of "normie" too. Not country like the Florida guy -- we actually live in Florida, lol -- and he actually hates golf and is irreligious (lol), but yeah, more normie compared to me and not part of the goth scene. (I personally don't consider myself goth btw. I guess I'm more alt/"darkly inclined"? I am very much part of the scene, however, and have been part of it since my teens. My boyfriend is cool with it but isn't really a participant.)
I wanna see more Goth club shorts. 🖤🌙👍🏾
Red is definitely your color ❤
Aw, thank you!
I want a movie about this
Youre outfit hwre is so beautiful! Imm have to find a shirt like the red one, i love it sm 😭♥️ it's so vampirey
Thank you! It's a dress, I got it on depop. Made by Nastygal. www.depop.com/products/saturdaygalileo-nasty-gal-red-sheer-lace/
@@angelabenedict even better!!!! I love dresses, specially ones like that! Thank you, I'm gonna buy it asap 😂🖤
Love love love the outfit! And the lipstick color! Can you please let me know where both are from? Thanks Angela 😍
think we dodge bullets by contacting our ex's ..sad but true😉hope you have a great time out tonight !!!
Rarely does anything good come from reaching out to your ex.
@@angelabenedict Indeed!! Lessons learnt the hard way! Least we survived for the better!!😊
Awesome red top Angi🤘💀🖤❤️
i love how anti-"and-they-all-lived-happily-ever-after" the ending is. it's like, yep, this was fucking weird, he's gone now thank god and life goes on lool
You are the older goth sister I wish I had growing up. I love hearing your life stories your way of conveying baby bat shit crazy stories is absolutely exemplary 🖤🦇. Many can be very forlorn when they try tell their baby bat past stories.
glad your in a better place now Angela you always have good Stories your outfits keep getting more nice 😎
My advice is simply retain those fond memories of your past, but never dig them up for extra curiosity. look back with smiles and gratitude, look forward with a stern look and clenched fists 😺
I could have used your words of wisdom back then. That would have been a bad experience avoided.
@@angelabenedict thankfully mental clumsiness is something we all fade out from as we grow older and wiser, but I fear social media has extended that time and let it grow to full blown stupidity.
I love this amazing libra.
- a libra from Switzerland
Hello, fellow Libra!
Yay libra gang!
You're like my internet goth older sister or mom🖤
I would love for you to talk about newer goth bands that you enjoy.
Oh man! What a story. Relatable on many levels. You should have worn your Offspring t-shirt.
Every now and then the corpo-weasles get a hold of the cultural strands and water them down and sanitize them enough to be safe for mass consumption until it's exhausted. Then the culture can have time to recover and get healthy again in an organic sort of way. Sounds like NYC is back.
Thank you for the story and all. Your husband I dare say is one of your best decisions. Cheers.
Offspring isn't a Goth band. You didn't know?
@@IndigoRaven-zx8hp she just mentioned she had the t-shirt and it may have been funny to wear it precisely because it's not goth.
I still memorize phone numbers to an extent.
Ever hear a jingle from an old commercial or something that you totally forgotten about from when you were a child and start to skeptically sing along wondering where in your brain this thing was hidden?
@@angelabenedict YES. My kid roasts me for it 😂
Love the fit :)
Thank you!
I wish I was never a heavy drinker 😅
Goth People are very very very Cool 😎 to Hang Out with for real, my Friends.
how did you end up in the batcave ???
Out of all the places I ended up during those months, the batcave was the most stable.
@@angelabenedict haha i mean how all of you including your golf shoes ex decided to go there together? like you went and he asked to join ?
@@evgraph_polycarpovich Saturday came around and I knew I wanted to go to the Batcave, I had plans to go with my one ex and I figured, what better buffer do We need for this nightmare then the bat cave!
Spill us the tea 🫖 ! >:D We love a good story girl!
Love you're intelligent videos angela you deserve a loving relationship you are a loving lovable woman you have been through so much interesting video you are an interesting person
teheheeh...angie got BUSTED 😹
💯💯💯
Do you think New York becoming corporate after the attack on the WTC led to the co-option of alternative culture by big corporations and the state, or was this just an acceleration of the process set in motion in the previous decade?
As a C-Squat, ABC affiliated GutterGoth who lived on 6th and C in a black, green, and purple Ford farmtruck van with a Travel-girl and my homie Grim, I can weigh in and say it is both. Been progressing for many years before 911, but that event accelerated things very much. Ain't no C-Squatters feeding at LA Plaza in Losaida with crowds of every Alt imaginable breaking bread with street thugs, wastoid junkies, Homebums, Skinheads...whoever was hungry...not popsicle now AT ALL. I was in ATL making almost yuppie level money with my wife...Goth as it gets, but I saw the major shift on 911...felt it distinctly...and ALL culture rapidly changed, not just Alt or Goth.