Dude Trust me on this i have autism and yet i can talk to girls Like all the time but talk to strangers forme is the worst and its not just girls i even get anxiety to talk with new guys.
Bro honestly, a girl will almost NEVER approach you. A lot of the times there are cues that she has interest in you, but she will almost never hit on you. I've had conversations with girls at my job from fellow employees to customers, and working at a grocery store has helped my confidence so much.
i have dated several women, and almost all of them approached me or at least told me, directly and with words that they like me. its not that hard. chicks will hit you with 1 nano second of eye contact and THAT was their 'hint'
@@clanof1144 the only type of girls that approach me are the ones that I'm just not attracted to. But I have got super small hints from women I do find attractive, but they are super subtle about it.
i be having insecurities about not having my own place and car, but watching your videos really gave me a small boost of confidence to start working on myself
Comparison is the theif of joy bro Some people become a CEO at 25 and die at 50 Some people become a CEO at 50 and live to 90 You not late and you not early, you following your own path brother. keep grinding
@@teodortodorov1662 Not really i've seen people starting a family at age of 20 and they already look like they hit the wall lol, at the age of 20 you should enjoy your life making mistakes and then learn from them it's called gaining experience.
Motivating as always Denmo. I've approached women often enough over the last 3.5 months that all my fears of being brushed off have disappeared. I've felt fear for the last time. It's made me a lot more confident with my approaches. In fact on my last two nights out (This past Friday and Saturday) I was approached by the girls. Thanks for the motivation, and remember: You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Smash it gents!
Man, I'm blown away! Reading this was such an experience. It's incredible to witness the magic that happens when we step up and put in the effort. This is the exact reason I scroll through comments. Seeing such victories genuinely fuels my passion to keep producing my own stuff. You're killing it, man! Keep it up! Totally made my day.
the best way to talk to anyone without being ignored is just by saying hi. once they notice your saying hi then you can start conversing. hi solves all problems.
DUDE THANK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH. got out of a toxic relationship and this genuinely just woke me up to the reality that shit isn’t just going to come to me. Denmo thank you brother.
My first approach resulted in relations which lasted almost two years. Then I was getting over them for about a year. And I don't know why but now it's sooo hard to make myself approach someone and create this new "first" approach even when I go out intentionally for doing it.
This is solid video. I stopped using Instagram and all my social media apps. And started making small talks to the strangers and girls. Loving the new mindset!
As a Latin guy I went to Latino night expecting to dance to Latina women and they all shut me down bc they were looking for white guys to dance with. I still haven’t recovered from that but this gives me hope lol
bro what on earth are you talking about? im a 5’10 decent looking white man and i have barely ever got any sexual attention from latina women. they don’t care for us any more than average white women do
Bro I hope you find a good girl that’s bs that they wanna get a white guy because as a white guy I never have any latinas take interest in me just keep to it and stay frosty 😎
BRO the first approach wasn't as near traumatic as you think. If the girl in the first approach would've treated me like this, it still would've been the kindest way a stranger woman treated me ever.
People "trying to get a gf" is the problem. They psyche themselves out like dude its just a chick. Supposed to be fun. Stop putting them of a pedestal.
So relatable and takes me back to asvice a female friend once gave me, which boiled down to "hey its supposed to be fun" (referring to dating) yet ive turned it into this arduous goal to achieve and hotten to a point where i dont even want to bother, and im not a lazy person. Im holding down a pretty decent full time job and am fairly active, yet its this "recreational" and completely optional part of life i seem to struggle with
Denmo is my favorite comedian 😂😂😂. You had me laughing to death throughout this video but seriously, this video was extremely helpful and I appreciate all your advice. I just wanted to say thank you because you have turned me from pussy introverted person into a much more extroverted, confident man. I still have so much work to do but I couldn’t have achieved what I have accomplished without you man. I’m ready to improve myself.
I've approched two girls and a few random guys two weeks ago when I was in the closest city to me, it's not weird at all and it went well well except for the time the two girls fled, but I think that they thought I was part of the stadium staff ;) It's actually fun, also not being the one that breaks eye contact with strangers or avoids it makes you feel powerful Love the vids, you're hilarious as always
I need to get into better shape before I can begin to seriously try with the girls. I'm very overweight, but not too far gone. I got a trainer and am in the gym EVERY GODDAMN DAY without fail. I also socialize with my fellow gym regulars, some of whom are now friends. Gonna continue to socialize as much as possible, so when I am in great shape and I stand a chance with girls, I'm not rusty. We're gonna fuckin make it bois 😤
yeah that's literally what this guy is leaving out, if you're like a 2-4 realistically don't even bother trying to talk to girls you aint ready, you need to self improve and focus on yourself and before u know it they are approaching you and u got the confidence to back it up , simple.
I don’t know why but I resonated with this rant since I used to work a lot of labour jobs before I got to college. Crazy how most people can’t even hold a simple conversation these days…..
*Many guys don’t realize that girls often appreciate when someone takes the initiative. Approaching with confidence can lead to unexpected connections.*
I cold DM'd once on facebook like 10 years ago when I was 21. Ended up getting friendzoned. Still proud that I did it though. My 2 actual long term girlfriends both came from hanging out with mutual friends. I have zero faith in cold approaching IRL, especially at 31.
Im 32 and I cold approach, it takes time to desensitize. And you actually have zero faith in yourself and that you can figure it out and that's where you should work, maybe with a therapist.
This video got me thinking about skateboarding, the desensitize thing works on dating girls and also skateboarding. At first in skating you are not good and you fall down a lot, but if you keep practicing, you'll become good at it, and the pain of falling will not hurt. When people see my tricks, they get amazed. All this getting used to something everyday, desensitize the pain, desensitize getting laughed at when falling, makes it easier to become a skateboarder. I keep trying to get used to it, and now I'm planning on going to the X-Games. Me doing a 360 Kickflip trick now is instincts on skating. The "If you don't use it, you lose it" quote, takes more meaning now.
1:45 its actually weird because i learned this lesson through teaching myself how to play bass guitar. Its not in any of those ways but it feels like you're ramming your head into a wall and I learned the more you do the uncomfortable, the more comfortable it becomes.
5:25 Traveling to Sweden and Finland taught me how to keep eye contact with strangers. The people there may be reserved, but the women will stare you down like a hawk if they find you attractive.
First i was thinking weather i was keep watching this video or not cuz i felt somewhat uncomfortable but I was laughing my guts out after that till the end. so accurate man you rock \m/
hey jack i know this vid is 9months old, but man you have the words to motivate. Not the first video i've seen of you, you're spot on many things. You genuinely have the look of someone cool while also sounding like a cool guy. Who wouldn't like to hang out with a stud like Jack? I understand women ! Overall thanks for your work u put in
You are a great influencer and things you say really make sense to me. But when I see a pretty girl, I just I can't do that. Today I was at the beach and saw really attractive girl, 10/10, she was with her female friend (or girlfriend?). Of course I *thought* about approaching her, but as I planned everything in my head I started question myself: "How do I get to talk to her without offending another girl", "What if she is a lesbian", "What if she doesn't know English (I am currently in Croatia)?". Frick, I planned everything up and come up with a genius line which covers all of these cases, but I didn't know how to walk away if I fail. Besides, just thinking about it periodically looking at her made me really nervous, when our eyes crossed I had a micro heart atack. And at the end, I was just sitting there nervously till they went home. I felt terrible, broken and sad.
I can talk to girls. But I just can't approach one. Not even once. The harder I try the harder it becomes. I know that if I approach one girl and just talk to her about literally anything, it will then be easier to do it next time and the confidence will only rise from there. But I cant even do the first
So do it don’t even think about it you can talk to them wherever you want on a plane, cruise, gym and store etc there is no such thing as the right time or rules.
My thoughts on this video. How to learn to drive a car? Practice by driving a car. How to learn skateboarding ? Go and practice on a skateboard. How to be good at talking with girls? Go and talk with girls. Aside of practice, if it feels there is no progress, look back, make conclusion, try it differently. At least, find someone who is more experienced, learn from him. Thanks for your efforts and uploads!
Get a girlfriend by just approaching strangers in public is a quite desperate strategy imo. I think approaching girls when being in a sport or theatre club for example is more effective and easier in general. When you are in multiple clubs and are there regularly chances rise. You have something in common with them and already a connection and don't have to start approaching with weird small talk like in public. But it also depends on culture. In some culture people are happy with being approached in some don't. East germany where I live is a bad place for that. We even have a word for that "Ellenbogengesellschaft" elbow society.
this hit hard, I for my whole highschool chareer I was the "quiet kid" and I didn't have any friends let alone girlfriends, because I expected others to approach me, I was afraid to approach others but I got tired of being so lonely, I got sad and during my last year I decided to face my fears and I got to know a cute girl and I built up the courage to ask her out on a date irl, standing in front of her with my legs shaking was terrifying, but she said yes it all turned out well and we were together for a while, now we are just friends but a friend is more than I had before meeting her. After that experience I found a lot of confidence and I can talk to people and pretty girls with more easily. but... I did pray for the courage and I don't think I did it alone. 🙏
I will still waste time and watch your videos bro, but that's gonna be about it. I really liked your direct and harsh-ish way, I needed that. Love your videos. Will definetly write down my list now. *Fistbump*
great video as usual Jack. i will definitely be using your advice now when school is starting up again after the break. there is one girl i have in mind and i'm 100% gonna get her number
My thing is I get super drained from having conversations with people. Idk it’s hard to explain, but I just feel drained and awkward silences make me start to blabber. Just for reference I’m 6’2, jacked, work for ford motor company, and good looking lol. Something about human interaction makes me feel very drained. I’d rather spend my time in my happy place (the gym)
Hey man, this video is almost a year old, but i want to thank you for it anyway. Nobody has stated this stuff in such a simple way. Im 26 and still afraid of women. I feel like i have missed the best years to enjoy youth. But im gonna just start talking to people like you said. Turn things around.
Cold approaching don’t work for guys who are not attractive. We all don’t look like you bro. Just because you had success doesn’t mean every man can replicate
Attractiveness is dynamic. Its not fixed, if you dont believe that then you will always still in the same place. Attractiveness is also confidience and bodylanguage, which anyone can become good at.
Denmo, I just realized I had a very similar experience to you! Got a summer job in construction totally on accident and honestly loved that. All the banter with the old guys there. Those skills I learnt there as well as from my father really have carried me far, even though I don't really go to any social events regularly. Really good advice to guys though. If you don't think you're competent in socializing ain't no better way to get better than start talking to people, if you're still too afraid of chatting up hot girls, start from your job, or with older people. I find those are more easy going and fun to talk to anyways XD
And knowing is half the battle. The key is staying in our socializing mode all the time until it's our normal state. We start by getting rid of the restless feeling we have when we activate social mode. Like Jackie Chan says "Kung Fu lives in everything we do, it lives in how we take off the jacket, and how we treat people, everything is Kung Fu".
Man, been to Rhodes (Greece) last week. I had 2 girls say the classic "i got a boyfriend", and the 3rd girl looked like she was into me but in the end she got a free drink from me and then she straight up dipped... I dont meet up with girls often, but women like this make approaching them really discouraging. I'm not avoiding them, i just find it hard to care about approaching them and make a conscious effort to meet women.
Currently paying off my Challenger that I got lent for my BDay, and need some new tires at that. But I have gone out and tried speaking to women just like you've said in the past- like humans. I got denied every time, don't know what to say or when to ask properly, but I did it. Nowadays some days are easier than others, but one day when I can save for it finally, I will look forward to learning from you, Desmo.
I think if you're watching porn, it will skew your perception as a man. In those videos, everything's set up to be sexual from the get-go, so there's no real 'getting to know someone' phase. or real seduction. It's all just... guaranteed. And think about it, if you watch a lot of porn, the place you see novel women the most often is in porn... This is training your brain in an unrealistic way. So when it comes to real-life interactions, it can be tough to navigate conversations and build genuine connections, or work real charm with girls. It's like missing the tools to naturally escalate the interaction. Drop the porn and you'll pick up the girls.
That is true however I like to follow these rules as much as possible: 1. Be attractive. 2. Don't be unattractive. 3. Don't be needy. 4. If you are unattractive then you need to exclusively approach unattractive women as well. 5. Have money... ideally lots of it.
The most successful I was with women in my 20s was when I was NOT watching porn all the time. When I started watching porn again when I was in an unhappy relationship the sex got worse and the relationship failed. The take away is porn is not healthy. I have stopped watching it again and now I’ve gained back some of my charm. Good luck guys. Once your happy in your own skin and your mind is not clouded with porn images you will be confident naturally.
I will accept your help. But I must warn you, I'm 31, have aspergers and I WILL freeze up when I see a cute girl and want to speak to her. If we were buddies in real life and you saw me, you'd be so annoyed that you'd literally push me over to the girl I'm looking at and be like "Speak to her, dude!".
7:07 a few days ago I got off the bus and looked at a girl at the bus then she looked at me, I smiled and she smiled back and we were smiling at each other but the bus left with her. Still that was aha moment for me, holy shit, it's so easy, now I'm gonna look more at girls in the streets
what if I'm rejecting girls on purpose because I like to be alone and focus on myself, doing useful things, making money and getting closer to my dream life instead of just wasting time for women
You're just saying this because you don't want them to "love" you for awhile before they take you to court and win half your stuff because you were lucky when you approached her and she didn't reject you..... yet
The actual reason that I went on dating apps was because I believed like a lot of people that it's just awkward and creepy to approach girls in real life, so I was tricked into believing that I would get more dating success through apps. Thanks to you I totally changed my views of the whole thing that now I am starting to go on actual dates.
Really love how I only found this video now after figuring out all of these things for myself and making the decisions to do all of these in the last couple of days instead of literally any time before now when I still needed to hear it ...though it does make me a lot less insecure in my thoughts lmao
I have big issues with talking to girls. I really dont know what they want and always that "I have a boyfriend" shit. I'm 31 now and would like to meet that one girl to make a family... but tbh.. it's so hard nowadays man... they don't know what they want. And the fact with her looking at you, you look back and smile.. she thinks I'm an idiot.. it's nearly impossible today. I like your channel because it motivating me and inspire me a little bit... but contrary to this it's nowadays only about money or you are 100% the type for that person.. i dont see any chance to talk to a girl. It's not about self esteem.. i talked this year to 3 girls.. it started good we had a good conversation.. but that moment I asked her if she has a boyfriend or has time for a coffee... always that answer " i have a boyfriend sorry, or.. i dont think my boyfriend wants this"...
Love your videos. Gotten better at talking to legit anyone by working at a local gas station. Easiest thing bc I have to talk to everyone. I’ve learned to enjoy it and it’s soooo easy to talk to strangers wherever I am. Thanks John
You are Talking real I've been there.... So I started to Get out from There... been easy but sometime when we feel dull ,we start to feel helpless & shit... we really need to get out of our creepy head....
from a guy who went from 0 social skills to initiating 3 conversations a day: - its a lot easier if you "roll over" social interactions; talk to someone on the way to work > make small talk to people at work > talk to a stranger on the way home. by the time youre at conversation 2 or 3 youre still on the "mood" of conversation 1 and it becomes easier as you go through the day - dont overthink talking to people, the longer you sit there waiting if you wanna do it or not, the more you doubt yourself and you wont wanna do it in the end - most people are just really fucking bored and actually wanna talk to you if youre open to it
I've had tons of health issues when I was younger, now in my mid 30s when I fixed most of them I've grown/developed in terms of career and wealth, I have my own house, have money, planning to buy a vacation home. As for women I've been with only one, it didn't turn out good, she had health issues that could affect a potential child plus some other problems of her own, so I ended the relationship. I've survived without women most of my life , like 99%. Did I achieve a lot without women? Yes, did I survive without women? Yeah. Do I need one in order to be complete ? I don't think so. Will it be good to have one? Probably. Do i think about this all the time and I try all the time to get a girl and I have this as an ultimate goal? Not really, if it happens it happens. Am I shy and not very confident? Yep, I am, it's who I am. Do I want to change that by approaching women with some nonsense small talk just for the sake of it in order to try to beat the number game and hopefully get "THE ONE" and improve my confidence? I don't care that much, I'm approaching 40s, so when I was supposed to be very sexually active I wasn't due to my health issues and lack of money, now when I don't have health issues and I have a lot of money I feel tired and I am no longer that keen to find a girl, it's like meh for me. People should learn to be single and happy at the same time, saying that men are incomplete and miserable without women by their side is actually harmful and creates false expectation in some men.
The fact that you're willing to try and accept rejection is just motivating and encouraging, most of my life I've been trained and manipulated to be in isolation by religion, they wanted me to be different from the world and when I wanted to be a part of society they've punished me for it and you make it a lot easier to be a part of modern society, and part of that is talking to girls to have fun and potentially date.
The people who knock on your door every Saturday to hand you their magazine and to let you know that god is gonna destroy most people in the world except for them and their 8 million member count @@PurXion_777
I literally just had this situation at a gas station beautiful girl waiting on her car to be finished cleaning, and i chickened out Glad i watched this Its time to get over the hump and work it out Thanks Denmo
I think one important take away if you are feeling anxious about the things he is saying. Start slow, take small steps. If you find it really hard to talk to strangers start by just making eye contact, then maybe move on to just saying "Hi" when you walk by, do things like this until you feel comfortable then move on to the next step. If you jump straight to approaching it could work or it could be way too overwhelming.
Well, I just think “where will it probably end” and that makes me stop wanting to go for her. It’s just a lot of hustle and work for nothing. I know I am no super man. And, I wont lie about being better than someone else.
i did talk to 10 strangers everyday for a month where i had holiday, it realy desensitized me about talking to strangers. it was often awkward since im a natural introvert and dont talk to many people even when im home but i learned a lot and got used to being weird, what i llerned for the future when talking to strangers is that oversharing and talking much is better than being quite and helback, i just approched some random who dosnt know me so the best think is to tell them much about me so they become more at ease. since it didnt come naturaly to me it was bumpy and i often turned a conversation awkward because i stoped talking or just asked them and then they probs got creeped out and so on. i still talked with some people realy good and im still in contact with a brazilian girls that i talked to. but what hurt me more than everyone who ignored me or was weird to me was when my friends laughed at me because i spooke to randoms and it got awkward, i guess i should not let that stop me or care about it. still it hurt more than anything else. anyway i once was out with a friend alone talked to some girls he just keept waling because he tought i was weird and then i knew why he laughed at me with my other friends, because he has no balls and dosnt want to admit it, he told me he would go up to any girl and rizz her up but never did because the "vibe" was off or he didnt "feel" her. so maybe he laughed at me because he cant do what i did. i stoped it when i started to work again, since i life in a small vilage and the drive to the next city is a long while and expensive i didnt continue it. i have holidays agains soon so maybe i will go out there and talk to strangers again, this time i think im more confident since i gathered experience and got fiter and muscular which boosted my confidence.
i have never been able to talk to women in general. not even a super shy person, just a loner, now with no remaining friends because they didnt like my psycho ex, the one woman who ive dated for more than 2 months, and she physically beat me for the 2 years we were dating, still the best woman ive ever met unfortunately.
So Denmo I'm in a weird spot. I'm making money with a good career on track and plenty of friends to call a social life. My problem remains; approaching girls I don't know is unnatural to me.
What if I literally just dont inow how to hold a conversation? What if I genuinely just dont know what to do after saying hi? I freeze up and think "damn i didnt think id get this far" and dont know what to say. What if ive always been the quiet guy? I work at target so as youd imagine theres a good amount of attractive young ladies i work with but what if the only contact ive made w them in the entire time ive worked there was initiated by them? How do i go from never saying hi or trying to talk to them to all of the sudden trying to initiate conversation without it feeling weird or forced? Is trying to talk to your coworkers just a terrible idea to begin with? The last one i talked to a lot of the conversation and what i interpreted to be flirting was initiated by her, but when i finally got the balls to ask her out because i thought she was interested, i got rejected, and that basically killed off any last shred of confidence i had in myself cause if a girl goes out of her way to talk and flirt with me and STILL isnt interested then why would anyone else be? It left me so confused and lost cause i thought i saw all the signs and it still went nowhere. I saw her one more time the next monday after that and it was incredibly awkward and that was the last time i saw her, figured she mustve quit after that.
One day you will be old. You will regret the chances you did not take and the girls you did not meet. www.socializer.school
Thank you denmo for opening my eyes to the absolute hell I have created for myself
Considering how pleasant is to deal with a girl in her 20s in 2023, i would say I probably wont regret it bro
I’ll worry bout girls when i reach 10%
My thinking exactly. I'm 38 and I'm tired of being scared of rejection.
I don't do things based on fear. That "You're gonna be old one day" doesn't quite work. I'll tell you some time if you'd like as to why.
Dude Trust me on this i have autism and yet i can talk to girls Like all the time but talk to strangers forme is the worst and its not just girls i even get anxiety to talk with new guys.
"do you want to?"
"no"
emotional damage
and yet here I am, still alive to tell the tale
Steel your Mind! YOU are the catch, these girls aint shit! Their loss!
@@Denmosocialwith a funny story. That's what most don't get. You get rejected so what that hard pass was funny that you laugh about now
Lmaooooo
@@Denmosocial
She wasn't that attractive anyways. She has a weird, hooked-shaped nose.
Bro honestly, a girl will almost NEVER approach you. A lot of the times there are cues that she has interest in you, but she will almost never hit on you. I've had conversations with girls at my job from fellow employees to customers, and working at a grocery store has helped my confidence so much.
it's because men are the hunters, it was like that centuries ago,
@brianslender4220 It wasn't like this centuries ago.
Bro read a history book.
@@brianslender4220 me when I post misinformation on the internet:
i have dated several women, and almost all of them approached me or at least told me, directly and with words that they like me. its not that hard. chicks will hit you with 1 nano second of eye contact and THAT was their 'hint'
@@clanof1144 the only type of girls that approach me are the ones that I'm just not attracted to. But I have got super small hints from women I do find attractive, but they are super subtle about it.
i be having insecurities about not having my own place and car, but watching your videos really gave me a small boost of confidence to start working on myself
Bruh I got car before few days ago, but now I don`t even wanna drive it. I started value my bicycle more :D
@@teodortodorov1662Too many crazy drivers out there.
Comparison is the theif of joy bro
Some people become a CEO at 25 and die at 50
Some people become a CEO at 50 and live to 90
You not late and you not early, you following your own path brother. keep grinding
@@F32Aidan The younger you start the better it will be
@@teodortodorov1662 Not really i've seen people starting a family at age of 20 and they already look like they hit the wall lol, at the age of 20 you should enjoy your life making mistakes and then learn from them it's called gaining experience.
Motivating as always Denmo. I've approached women often enough over the last 3.5 months that all my fears of being brushed off have disappeared. I've felt fear for the last time. It's made me a lot more confident with my approaches. In fact on my last two nights out (This past Friday and Saturday) I was approached by the girls. Thanks for the motivation, and remember: You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.
Smash it gents!
absolute legend mate thanks for sharing
Are you smashing them now ? 😂 did you take the course ?
I take the last sentence, you are king bro keep doing the work
@@kyledalton703 I've not taken the course, still texting one.
Man, I'm blown away! Reading this was such an experience. It's incredible to witness the magic that happens when we step up and put in the effort.
This is the exact reason I scroll through comments. Seeing such victories genuinely fuels my passion to keep producing my own stuff. You're killing it, man! Keep it up!
Totally made my day.
although that first approach was rejected, it was still solid and executed pretty smooth ngl
no bro was acting like a megafhhaghot and putting his fists on his hips like a supergay
@@Jaapst... I have no hope then
nah bro that wasn't smooth
Asking if you know someone who you obviously don't is just a lie, and then following up with a cheesy pick-up line is not that smooth.
@@Jaapstlol what. That girl literally looked like a goblin. What r u saying lmfao
Gotta love how he directs his points in such a relatable way that it feels like he's living under my own skin... Banger video as always, Denmo
the best way to talk to anyone without being ignored is just by saying hi. once they notice your saying hi then you can start conversing. hi solves all problems.
DUDE THANK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH. got out of a toxic relationship and this genuinely just woke me up to the reality that shit isn’t just going to come to me. Denmo thank you brother.
Dude. It's SO true. No one just spontaneously talks to each other anymore!!!
My first approach resulted in relations which lasted almost two years. Then I was getting over them for about a year. And I don't know why but now it's sooo hard to make myself approach someone and create this new "first" approach even when I go out intentionally for doing it.
bro I feel the same, my first approach led to a cute relationship, but now it's over, so now I'm gonna become a God at approaching ladies.
same, idk what to do I feel so fragile
This is solid video. I stopped using Instagram and all my social media apps. And started making small talks to the strangers and girls. Loving the new mindset!
I am in no way someone that struggles with socializing, but this is still a Great video to light a fire under my ass. Thanks dude
One thing I’m scared of is thinking someone is waving at me so I wave back but it was someone behind me they waved too
As a Latin guy I went to Latino night expecting to dance to Latina women and they all shut me down bc they were looking for white guys to dance with. I still haven’t recovered from that but this gives me hope lol
bro what on earth are you talking about? im a 5’10 decent looking white man and i have barely ever got any sexual attention from latina women. they don’t care for us any more than average white women do
Lmao! That would fuck me up too but I’m sure it was just the wrong crowd
I gave up after my first attempt 3 years ago. I was 22. I might never try again. It's really uncomfortable.
@@darkmidnight818 too young to give up, definitely the wrong crowd so I just take my own girl if I’m going to the boogie place
Bro I hope you find a good girl that’s bs that they wanna get a white guy because as a white guy I never have any latinas take interest in me just keep to it and stay frosty 😎
I don’t have time for girls now I survived eight years without a hug I’ll survive two more gotta get that money to change the world
Thank you Excuse-Man for changing the world
What have you been doing that is changing the world? Posting RUclips comments?
as long as you are not jeff bezos, neither a girlfriend or money will change this world
Cope
8 year cope damn bro is committed
BRO the first approach wasn't as near traumatic as you think. If the girl in the first approach would've treated me like this, it still would've been the kindest way a stranger woman treated me ever.
preach.
People "trying to get a gf" is the problem. They psyche themselves out like dude its just a chick. Supposed to be fun. Stop putting them of a pedestal.
So relatable and takes me back to asvice a female friend once gave me, which boiled down to "hey its supposed to be fun" (referring to dating) yet ive turned it into this arduous goal to achieve and hotten to a point where i dont even want to bother, and im not a lazy person. Im holding down a pretty decent full time job and am fairly active, yet its this "recreational" and completely optional part of life i seem to struggle with
Getting rejected is supposed to be fun? Rrrrrright 😂
Thanks this video has really upped my confidence to approach more girls although my wife is super annoyed now.
lmaooo i live for comments like these
spitting facts dude. you're right - we can either grow a pair or hide like a cockroach for ever. thanks for the tough love man
Denmo is my favorite comedian 😂😂😂. You had me laughing to death throughout this video but seriously, this video was extremely helpful and I appreciate all your advice. I just wanted to say thank you because you have turned me from pussy introverted person into a much more extroverted, confident man. I still have so much work to do but I couldn’t have achieved what I have accomplished without you man. I’m ready to improve myself.
Let’s gooo!
I've approched two girls and a few random guys two weeks ago when I was in the closest city to me, it's not weird at all and it went well
well except for the time the two girls fled, but I think that they thought I was part of the stadium staff ;)
It's actually fun, also not being the one that breaks eye contact with strangers or avoids it makes you feel powerful
Love the vids, you're hilarious as always
You completely stated what I was thinking 1 year ago. I am very inspired. Thank you for your encouragement. I think it is time to really take action.
I need to get into better shape before I can begin to seriously try with the girls. I'm very overweight, but not too far gone. I got a trainer and am in the gym EVERY GODDAMN DAY without fail. I also socialize with my fellow gym regulars, some of whom are now friends. Gonna continue to socialize as much as possible, so when I am in great shape and I stand a chance with girls, I'm not rusty. We're gonna fuckin make it bois 😤
yeah that's literally what this guy is leaving out, if you're like a 2-4 realistically don't even bother trying to talk to girls you aint ready, you need to self improve and focus on yourself and before u know it they are approaching you and u got the confidence to back it up , simple.
I don’t know why but I resonated with this rant since I used to work a lot of labour jobs before I got to college. Crazy how most people can’t even hold a simple conversation these days…..
*Many guys don’t realize that girls often appreciate when someone takes the initiative. Approaching with confidence can lead to unexpected connections.*
I think this is your best video to date. You really outdid yourself here man. Phenomenal stuff. Thank you so much.
I cold DM'd once on facebook like 10 years ago when I was 21. Ended up getting friendzoned. Still proud that I did it though. My 2 actual long term girlfriends both came from hanging out with mutual friends. I have zero faith in cold approaching IRL, especially at 31.
Don't do it unless you're chad or tyrone
@@Woeisme2 shut up, bro
Im 32 and I cold approach, it takes time to desensitize. And you actually have zero faith in yourself and that you can figure it out and that's where you should work, maybe with a therapist.
Yeah this eye contact thing fked me up big time, always looked down as soon as eye contact was made
No more
This video got me thinking about skateboarding, the desensitize thing works on dating girls and also skateboarding. At first in skating you are not good and you fall down a lot, but if you keep practicing, you'll become good at it, and the pain of falling will not hurt. When people see my tricks, they get amazed. All this getting used to something everyday, desensitize the pain, desensitize getting laughed at when falling, makes it easier to become a skateboarder. I keep trying to get used to it, and now I'm planning on going to the X-Games. Me doing a 360 Kickflip trick now is instincts on skating. The "If you don't use it, you lose it" quote, takes more meaning now.
Most of you will take this message and go about you're day, but his spitting straight game. 100% facts brother.
1:45 its actually weird because i learned this lesson through teaching myself how to play bass guitar. Its not in any of those ways but it feels like you're ramming your head into a wall and I learned the more you do the uncomfortable, the more comfortable it becomes.
5:25 Traveling to Sweden and Finland taught me how to keep eye contact with strangers. The people there may be reserved, but the women will stare you down like a hawk if they find you attractive.
First i was thinking weather i was keep watching this video or not cuz i felt somewhat uncomfortable but I was laughing my guts out after that till the end. so accurate man you rock \m/
hey jack i know this vid is 9months old, but man you have the words to motivate. Not the first video i've seen of you, you're spot on many things. You genuinely have the look of someone cool while also sounding like a cool guy. Who wouldn't like to hang out with a stud like Jack? I understand women ! Overall thanks for your work u put in
You are a great influencer and things you say really make sense to me. But when I see a pretty girl, I just I can't do that. Today I was at the beach and saw really attractive girl, 10/10, she was with her female friend (or girlfriend?). Of course I *thought* about approaching her, but as I planned everything in my head I started question myself: "How do I get to talk to her without offending another girl", "What if she is a lesbian", "What if she doesn't know English (I am currently in Croatia)?". Frick, I planned everything up and come up with a genius line which covers all of these cases, but I didn't know how to walk away if I fail. Besides, just thinking about it periodically looking at her made me really nervous, when our eyes crossed I had a micro heart atack. And at the end, I was just sitting there nervously till they went home. I felt terrible, broken and sad.
I can talk to girls. But I just can't approach one. Not even once. The harder I try the harder it becomes. I know that if I approach one girl and just talk to her about literally anything, it will then be easier to do it next time and the confidence will only rise from there. But I cant even do the first
So do it don’t even think about it you can talk to them wherever you want on a plane, cruise, gym and store etc there is no such thing as the right time or rules.
Just do it, trust
Try with a captive audience ie someone who has to talk to you: waiters, cashiers, volunteers, classmates.
Us bro us
yes you can bro trust yourself
My thoughts on this video.
How to learn to drive a car? Practice by driving a car.
How to learn skateboarding ? Go and practice on a skateboard.
How to be good at talking with girls? Go and talk with girls.
Aside of practice, if it feels there is no progress, look back, make conclusion, try it differently. At least, find someone who is more experienced, learn from him.
Thanks for your efforts and uploads!
Mentors are a powerful resource.
"The worst she can say is no."
When she says no:
Get a girlfriend by just approaching strangers in public is a quite desperate strategy imo. I think approaching girls when being in a sport or theatre club for example is more effective and easier in general. When you are in multiple clubs and are there regularly chances rise. You have something in common with them and already a connection and don't have to start approaching with weird small talk like in public. But it also depends on culture. In some culture people are happy with being approached in some don't. East germany where I live is a bad place for that. We even have a word for that "Ellenbogengesellschaft" elbow society.
But what if there are no girls in any of the clubs that you're in?
this hit hard, I for my whole highschool chareer I was the "quiet kid" and I didn't have any friends let alone girlfriends, because I expected others to approach me, I was afraid to approach others
but I got tired of being so lonely, I got sad and during my last year I decided to face my fears and I got to know a cute girl and I built up the courage to ask her out on a date irl, standing in front of her with my legs shaking was terrifying, but she said yes
it all turned out well and we were together for a while, now we are just friends
but a friend is more than I had before meeting her. After that experience I found a lot of confidence and I can talk to people and pretty girls with more easily.
but... I did pray for the courage and I don't think I did it alone. 🙏
I will still waste time and watch your videos bro, but that's gonna be about it. I really liked your direct and harsh-ish way, I needed that. Love your videos. Will definetly write down my list now. *Fistbump*
glad you admitted it and are improving. i gotchu bro
@@Denmosocial Spent last weekend at a girls house and got invited for dinner today by another one. Improvements week by week bro 👊
legendary hope to see you in my community one day
great video as usual Jack. i will definitely be using your advice now when school is starting up again after the break. there is one girl i have in mind and i'm 100% gonna get her number
hell yeah brother
Good luck
Pray she doesn’t #MeToo you
My thing is I get super drained from having conversations with people. Idk it’s hard to explain, but I just feel drained and awkward silences make me start to blabber. Just for reference I’m 6’2, jacked, work for ford motor company, and good looking lol. Something about human interaction makes me feel very drained. I’d rather spend my time in my happy place (the gym)
What do you do at Ford, if you don't mind my asking?
Denmo you are the man. Thank you for making this video.
Hey man, this video is almost a year old, but i want to thank you for it anyway. Nobody has stated this stuff in such a simple way. Im 26 and still afraid of women. I feel like i have missed the best years to enjoy youth. But im gonna just start talking to people like you said. Turn things around.
Cold approaching don’t work for guys who are not attractive. We all don’t look like you bro. Just because you had success doesn’t mean every man can replicate
Cold approaching has a massive failure rate. Maybe 97 ish percent.
And maybe higher if you're 5 or lower in looks.
Define attractive.
Attractiveness is dynamic. Its not fixed, if you dont believe that then you will always still in the same place.
Attractiveness is also confidience and bodylanguage, which anyone can become good at.
@@Tom-hw4bt So a 5’2 balding Indian janitor just needs to be confident right? 😂
@@Sandwich14-e9c Bro u need to step up and be a man fight for your life 👊
Love what you're doing man.
Keep up with the good work ♥️
Denmo, I just realized I had a very similar experience to you! Got a summer job in construction totally on accident and honestly loved that. All the banter with the old guys there. Those skills I learnt there as well as from my father really have carried me far, even though I don't really go to any social events regularly.
Really good advice to guys though. If you don't think you're competent in socializing ain't no better way to get better than start talking to people, if you're still too afraid of chatting up hot girls, start from your job, or with older people. I find those are more easy going and fun to talk to anyways XD
Dude, you're one of the best out here. You give me hope. Thanks for getting my ass out there in them streets.😂
I'll leave the girls for you guys, I must focus on my goals.
BS, thats cope. There's always time for both, youth won't be around forever.
You're gonna miss the Young life of yours. Then you're gonna regret it later. Do it!
@@rishav_killerx6011 Nah things have changed since I wrote that comment. Got a girlfriend and a good job now.
@@robertclark1669 Glad to hear it! how did you met her? Did you approached her or what and where
@ We met in school and she asked me out after a year.
Man this popped up ind im more motivated then ever to go out and just talk to people
This guy is really good.. makes alot of sense....
And knowing is half the battle. The key is staying in our socializing mode all the time until it's our normal state. We start by getting rid of the restless feeling we have when we activate social mode. Like Jackie Chan says "Kung Fu lives in everything we do, it lives in how we take off the jacket, and how we treat people, everything is Kung Fu".
Man, been to Rhodes (Greece) last week. I had 2 girls say the classic "i got a boyfriend", and the 3rd girl looked like she was into me but in the end she got a free drink from me and then she straight up dipped... I dont meet up with girls often, but women like this make approaching them really discouraging. I'm not avoiding them, i just find it hard to care about approaching them and make a conscious effort to meet women.
We need more compassionate, fun and open minded women in the world
that's classic diva greek girls my guy.
Do what you did, a tiny investment if any. No meals or trips etc until after you know her and you're more comfortable with the hope of a relationship
Currently paying off my Challenger that I got lent for my BDay, and need some new tires at that. But I have gone out and tried speaking to women just like you've said in the past- like humans. I got denied every time, don't know what to say or when to ask properly, but I did it. Nowadays some days are easier than others, but one day when I can save for it finally, I will look forward to learning from you, Desmo.
I think if you're watching porn, it will skew your perception as a man.
In those videos, everything's set up to be sexual from the get-go, so there's no real 'getting to know someone' phase. or real seduction.
It's all just... guaranteed.
And think about it, if you watch a lot of porn, the place you see novel women the most often is in porn... This is training your brain in an unrealistic way.
So when it comes to real-life interactions, it can be tough to navigate conversations and build genuine connections, or work real charm with girls. It's like missing the tools to naturally escalate the interaction.
Drop the porn and you'll pick up the girls.
That is true however I like to follow these rules as much as possible:
1. Be attractive.
2. Don't be unattractive.
3. Don't be needy.
4. If you are unattractive then you need to exclusively approach unattractive women as well.
5. Have money... ideally lots of it.
@@RealHomeRecording boom. We are on the same wavelength! I need more dudes like you in my own comments haha. Well said
@@mustbecome hehe, thanks! You sir had the superior comment I was just adding a little bit of extra to it.
Stopping porn doesn't help
The most successful I was with women in my 20s was when I was NOT watching porn all the time. When I started watching porn again when I was in an unhappy relationship the sex got worse and the relationship failed. The take away is porn is not healthy. I have stopped watching it again and now I’ve gained back some of my charm. Good luck guys. Once your happy in your own skin and your mind is not clouded with porn images you will be confident naturally.
I will accept your help. But I must warn you, I'm 31, have aspergers and I WILL freeze up when I see a cute girl and want to speak to her. If we were buddies in real life and you saw me, you'd be so annoyed that you'd literally push me over to the girl I'm looking at and be like "Speak to her, dude!".
7:07 a few days ago I got off the bus and looked at a girl at the bus then she looked at me, I smiled and she smiled back and we were smiling at each other but the bus left with her. Still that was aha moment for me, holy shit, it's so easy, now I'm gonna look more at girls in the streets
Thank you Jack for giving me courage to approach women, I really admire your tips for a lot of men that struggle talking to women and approaching
what if I'm rejecting girls on purpose because I like to be alone and focus on myself, doing useful things, making money and getting closer to my dream life instead of just wasting time for women
Then you're smart.
Then you have truly won the game.
@AaroKo Women don't approach guys anyway
You're just saying this because you don't want them to "love" you for awhile before they take you to court and win half your stuff because you were lucky when you approached her and she didn't reject you..... yet
The actual reason that I went on dating apps was because I believed like a lot of people that it's just awkward and creepy to approach girls in real life, so I was tricked into believing that I would get more dating success through apps. Thanks to you I totally changed my views of the whole thing that now I am starting to go on actual dates.
This guy keeps it real though. You’re completely right I just need to stop listening to the negative voice in my head that tells me not to do things.
Really love how I only found this video now after figuring out all of these things for myself and making the decisions to do all of these in the last couple of days instead of literally any time before now when I still needed to hear it
...though it does make me a lot less insecure in my thoughts lmao
I have big issues with talking to girls. I really dont know what they want and always that "I have a boyfriend" shit. I'm 31 now and would like to meet that one girl to make a family... but tbh.. it's so hard nowadays man... they don't know what they want.
And the fact with her looking at you, you look back and smile.. she thinks I'm an idiot.. it's nearly impossible today. I like your channel because it motivating me and inspire me a little bit... but contrary to this it's nowadays only about money or you are 100% the type for that person.. i dont see any chance to talk to a girl. It's not about self esteem.. i talked this year to 3 girls.. it started good we had a good conversation.. but that moment I asked her if she has a boyfriend or has time for a coffee... always that answer " i have a boyfriend sorry, or.. i dont think my boyfriend wants this"...
Just say but he isn't here right now.
Love your videos. Gotten better at talking to legit anyone by working at a local gas station. Easiest thing bc I have to talk to everyone. I’ve learned to enjoy it and it’s soooo easy to talk to strangers wherever I am. Thanks John
Thank you for making this video's. I vow to start talking to women on the street. Keep you posted how that's going
How's it going?
So fukn right %100. You expreinced all.
Idk why but it hurts just a little more getting rejected by 5s and 6s vs 8s and 9s 😂
Because you assume it’s a higher chance the 5 says yes. You’re even more outcome based when asking out an average girl.
Best to only go for the hot ones and use the less attractive ones to make conversation and if she's interested then go for it if that's what you want
The normies get asked out more so I'd say go for the hot ones lol
You are Talking real I've been there.... So I started to Get out from There... been easy but sometime when we feel dull ,we start to feel helpless & shit... we really need to get out of our creepy head....
i feel you bro 0:19
from a guy who went from 0 social skills to initiating 3 conversations a day:
- its a lot easier if you "roll over" social interactions; talk to someone on the way to work > make small talk to people at work > talk to a stranger on the way home. by the time youre at conversation 2 or 3 youre still on the "mood" of conversation 1 and it becomes easier as you go through the day
- dont overthink talking to people, the longer you sit there waiting if you wanna do it or not, the more you doubt yourself and you wont wanna do it in the end
- most people are just really fucking bored and actually wanna talk to you if youre open to it
I love your brutal honesty. I hope you know this help me
I've had tons of health issues when I was younger, now in my mid 30s when I fixed most of them I've grown/developed in terms of career and wealth, I have my own house, have money, planning to buy a vacation home. As for women I've been with only one, it didn't turn out good, she had health issues that could affect a potential child plus some other problems of her own, so I ended the relationship. I've survived without women most of my life , like 99%. Did I achieve a lot without women? Yes, did I survive without women? Yeah. Do I need one in order to be complete ? I don't think so. Will it be good to have one? Probably. Do i think about this all the time and I try all the time to get a girl and I have this as an ultimate goal? Not really, if it happens it happens. Am I shy and not very confident? Yep, I am, it's who I am. Do I want to change that by approaching women with some nonsense small talk just for the sake of it in order to try to beat the number game and hopefully get "THE ONE" and improve my confidence? I don't care that much, I'm approaching 40s, so when I was supposed to be very sexually active I wasn't due to my health issues and lack of money, now when I don't have health issues and I have a lot of money I feel tired and I am no longer that keen to find a girl, it's like meh for me. People should learn to be single and happy at the same time, saying that men are incomplete and miserable without women by their side is actually harmful and creates false expectation in some men.
Stop being a lame ass start smashing models in their 20's.
This is your best video of all time Jack
send it to your friends brother
@@Denmosocial surely will do that
The fact that you're willing to try and accept rejection is just motivating and encouraging, most of my life I've been trained and manipulated to be in isolation by religion, they wanted me to be different from the world and when I wanted to be a part of society they've punished me for it and you make it a lot easier to be a part of modern society, and part of that is talking to girls to have fun and potentially date.
What religion are you talking about
The people who knock on your door every Saturday to hand you their magazine and to let you know that god is gonna destroy most people in the world except for them and their 8 million member count
@@PurXion_777
@@PurXion_777jehovas witness
Really enjoying your videos Bro! I'm starting to put what you teach into action. I need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable!
It's a year into the future and you just realized that male loneliness is an actual thing
I've been watching heaps of your vids. Mostly because Your crack up. But yeah this stuff is so important and can be adapted into so many areas of life
Thank you Bro, you are a Blessing for thus Generation.
I literally just had this situation at a gas station beautiful girl waiting on her car to be finished cleaning, and i chickened out
Glad i watched this
Its time to get over the hump and work it out
Thanks Denmo
I think one important take away if you are feeling anxious about the things he is saying. Start slow, take small steps. If you find it really hard to talk to strangers start by just making eye contact, then maybe move on to just saying "Hi" when you walk by, do things like this until you feel comfortable then move on to the next step. If you jump straight to approaching it could work or it could be way too overwhelming.
Well, I just think “where will it probably end” and that makes me stop wanting to go for her. It’s just a lot of hustle and work for nothing. I know I am no super man. And, I wont lie about being better than someone else.
great video,thanks man
This man is speaking straight facts none of that preparation shit
i did talk to 10 strangers everyday for a month where i had holiday, it realy desensitized me about talking to strangers. it was often awkward since im a natural introvert and dont talk to many people even when im home but i learned a lot and got used to being weird, what i llerned for the future when talking to strangers is that oversharing and talking much is better than being quite and helback, i just approched some random who dosnt know me so the best think is to tell them much about me so they become more at ease. since it didnt come naturaly to me it was bumpy and i often turned a conversation awkward because i stoped talking or just asked them and then they probs got creeped out and so on. i still talked with some people realy good and im still in contact with a brazilian girls that i talked to. but what hurt me more than everyone who ignored me or was weird to me was when my friends laughed at me because i spooke to randoms and it got awkward, i guess i should not let that stop me or care about it. still it hurt more than anything else. anyway i once was out with a friend alone talked to some girls he just keept waling because he tought i was weird and then i knew why he laughed at me with my other friends, because he has no balls and dosnt want to admit it, he told me he would go up to any girl and rizz her up but never did because the "vibe" was off or he didnt "feel" her. so maybe he laughed at me because he cant do what i did. i stoped it when i started to work again, since i life in a small vilage and the drive to the next city is a long while and expensive i didnt continue it. i have holidays agains soon so maybe i will go out there and talk to strangers again, this time i think im more confident since i gathered experience and got fiter and muscular which boosted my confidence.
Bumble add at 3:17 is crazy work bruv
As a man with 99+ Likes and around 270 Matches, talking is better than the dating apps. Go talk to people. Dating apps will forever be weird to "meet'
It interesting how the femenine energy its important for us men, we are not the same without them, i will keep on trying, thanks a lot
Just pull out the dopamine stick duuuuh (and the brilliant face expression) , haha you got me subbed.
i have never been able to talk to women in general. not even a super shy person, just a loner, now with no remaining friends because they didnt like my psycho ex, the one woman who ive dated for more than 2 months, and she physically beat me for the 2 years we were dating, still the best woman ive ever met unfortunately.
if the girl in the first clip told me that the way she did id be laughing my ass of because of the sassy attitude she had lol
So Denmo I'm in a weird spot. I'm making money with a good career on track and plenty of friends to call a social life. My problem remains; approaching girls I don't know is unnatural to me.
Just practice bro
everyone doesnt want to be as miserable as you@@simoneracioppa5733
One of your BEST videos
Damn 2:21 I'm a fearful avoidant whose a learned extrovert. That hit the soul but he's damn right. Need to put yourself out there 😅
What if I literally just dont inow how to hold a conversation? What if I genuinely just dont know what to do after saying hi? I freeze up and think "damn i didnt think id get this far" and dont know what to say. What if ive always been the quiet guy? I work at target so as youd imagine theres a good amount of attractive young ladies i work with but what if the only contact ive made w them in the entire time ive worked there was initiated by them? How do i go from never saying hi or trying to talk to them to all of the sudden trying to initiate conversation without it feeling weird or forced? Is trying to talk to your coworkers just a terrible idea to begin with? The last one i talked to a lot of the conversation and what i interpreted to be flirting was initiated by her, but when i finally got the balls to ask her out because i thought she was interested, i got rejected, and that basically killed off any last shred of confidence i had in myself cause if a girl goes out of her way to talk and flirt with me and STILL isnt interested then why would anyone else be? It left me so confused and lost cause i thought i saw all the signs and it still went nowhere. I saw her one more time the next monday after that and it was incredibly awkward and that was the last time i saw her, figured she mustve quit after that.
Went today to the paychologist and didn’t get anything usefull out of it. But this, this was exactly what i needed to hear
Your quips are fuckin hilarious bro. I appreciate what you do. Great content.
ur the big bro we all need
3:58 I spit my coffee. Goddamn I laughed so hard.