My mother taught me that if a woman thinks she's man enough to hit a man. She's man enough to get hit back by a man. Never used this but it stuck with me.
When I was a kid, one of my sisters used to pick fights with me and she had no problem punching me as hard as she could. Eventually, I retaliated. My parents go so sick of us fighting, they just said if no blood was spilled, nobody got punished. To this day, I have the attitude that if you hit me, I get to hit you back. I don't care what your gender is. Never in my adult life have I hit anyone, because I don't like getting into fights.
I feel like the term equal rights equal fight Applies to more that just the “you can’t hit girls.” It’s the idea that if rights are equal, then nobody should get something more but also TC Sam, I agree with you on that, I think that if someone does something to you then you can do it back to them equally.
Don’t roll in the mud with pigs, u do have a duty to retreat if possible. Not legal advice. But I do believe I’ve heard this for several self defense cases in different states in the US. And personally I’m saying do not go back
Yeah, that’s what I plan to teach my kids when I have them. “Don’t start fights, but if someone starts one with you, finish it.” Child self-defense classes will probably be something I have them try. And I do plan to tell the school when I start enrolling that if someone hits my kid, I don’t give a flying frick what the rules say, my kid is hitting back- twice as hard if there’s one of those stupid “zero tolerance” policies because if my kid’s going to get into trouble for defending themselves, they’re gonna make sure to leave a lasting make.
I don't think that was explicitly told to me as a child, but growing up in the late 70's and 80's, the message of "Boys don't cry" was definitely drilled into me. So much so, that the only time anyone has seen me cry in the last 40 years was when my I was talking to my girlfriend after finding out about my father's cancer diagnosis. Even then, I felt embarrassed and ashamed.
My little brother is and always has been a pretty sensitive kid. Our parents are pretty good about teaching about expressing emotions in a healthy way and how to be vulnerable, and are strongly against the message that boys don't cry. He's one of the kindest, most empathetic people I've seen, and he can bring a smile to almost anyone. Instead of teaching little boys that they should never cry, teach them about healthy ways to express emotions, because everyone has them regardless of gender.
@@jebes909090 like you! it is bad to tell someone "your feelings are invalid", it makes people bottle up their emotions, which is very harmful, one reason is that it can increase already bad feeling about ones self. i am a man and i have a soft heart and make others around me smile. lets say i get my leg cut off, am i supposed to "walk it off" or do i get my leg fixed? answer is number two. i am VERY emotional and when i stub my toe i don't start crying. men have feelings too
@@tcsam73 I'm sorry to hear about your father's illness. And anyway don't be ashamed about crying about that! It shows that you love your father very much and hated for anything bad to happen to him.
I know it's sadly true in some areas, but that'll they be punished for using self defense. In fact every area that has a stipulation on using self defense like the retreat clause needs to be removed. The criminal is the one who decided to do wrong. Why are we being scrutinized for fighting back and not making them feel more powerful?
I'm a younger sibling, so naturally, things were handed to me. This lead to me not having the level of knowledge my brother did when he was my age. This caused a bunch of issues like me not being able to make quick and rational decisions and giving up on trying something. Whenever I asked for help, I'd get the "wHeN I WaS YoUr aGe i kNeW HoW To dO ThAt" lecture. I'd then ask to let me do it by myself and correct me when I go wrong, but then they would take over and just do it for me anyways. If you're a parent or an older sibling, don't do this. If your child or sibling comes for help, help them, but let them take charge in whatever they're trying to do. This well help them learn it a lot faster and prevent so many pointless arguments. I'd also like to add that teaching kids not to talk back is so stupid. The kids have their side of the story too, and preventing them from saying that causes more harm than good.
4:35 I thought I was crazy to think being told to apologize and accept an apology was essentially forced. That never taught me anything except if I fake one I can pretty much get away relatively scott free. Though I've probably never done it. Then again my memory sucks.
I only ever faked an apology twice because in my life and I made ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that both the recipient and my mom know it was forced, I didn’t mean it, and I didn’t like doing it. Mom stopped forcing me to apologize after the second time because I basically told the person (a family friend and my mom is all about appearing like the perfect person and mother) “my mom told me to apologize to you, so I’m sorry, I guess. Happy now mom?”
Yes so many times on the forced apologies. I absolutely hate hearing someone say "now go say you're sorry" or "I'm expecting an apology". That apology is not genuine and feels more insulting than not apologizing.
You’re right but it’s teaching kids to say sorry when they are wrong in a situation they wouldn’t think to bc they don’t know yet. Idk another way to accomplish that but now, as an adult, I say sorry for everything even when I didn’t do anything wrong.
@@starquaked you teach them by explaining why what they did is wrong and teaching them to have empathy for other people. If your kid his Stacy another kid, rather than say “we don’t hit, say you’re sorry” you say “hitting isn’t nice, how would you feel if someone hit you? You’d feel bad right? That’s how that little kid feels.” You can SUGGEST apologizing, “hey buddy, we know why hitting is wrong. Maybe you should say you’re sorry because that really wasn’t nice. How would you feel if someone did that to you?” But telling a child to apologize or be punished is wrong.
@@starquaked yeah, a kid may not think to apologize because they’re kids, but they shouldn’t be forced. Part of a parent’s job is to teach empathy so kids don’t grow up to be uncaring towards their fellow living beings.
The “group punishment” thing made me remember something, I was in around second grade. I came home to my mom crying that I didn’t get recess. She said “oh no why not?” “Some kids did (stupid shit I don’t remember) so the entire grade had to skip recess and instead the teachers gave us a lesson on being respectful for our space” this wasn’t just a teacher level group punishment, the principal was directly involved. Well lucky for the second grade class that year, my mom knows a lot of other moms(I was a social kid and my mom met all my friends moms and they all made friends and it was a small town), some of whom were very important in the school. She told all her mom friends who asked their kids and after confirming they told all their mom friends until every mom who had a second grader knew. Principal was under so much pressure from all the moms she had to come out and admit she was wrong in her group punishment decision. I don’t remember what she did that stopped the parents anger but I think there was some sort of apology gift to all the kids so that the kids would stop reporting her shit to their parents.
As a child my dad always told me men don't cry, after he went to Iraq he would instead say "it's ok to cry, we all have our moments." Finally had him open up to what changed him years after I had enlisted and became a civilian EMT.
My @$$hole stepfather ALWAYS told me “adults don’t cry” even when I was a little girl that just fell down and got hurt. I’m an emotional person, so I cry at the drop of a hat. Like, even now as an almost 30 year old woman, I THINK of something sad and I get tears eyed. When I was around 8/9/10, we went to the movie theater and while waiting for the theater we would be seeing the movie in to open up, I played the skill crane and won a toy. While I did that an old friend of my parents recognized them and they stared talking. He was nice to me, so immediately liked him. Well, we get seated for our movie and I was playing with my cheap toy when I noticed a loose thread. I pulled it off and caused a good sized tear in the seam, which made me start to cry because my mom and stepdad always told me that if I break my toys they’ll be thrown away. My stepdad saw me crying and, in front of their friend, told me to stop crying or he’ll give me a reason to cry, adults don’t cry! I’ll never forge5 the look of absolute shock and horror on this guys face before he said (to my parents as much as to me) “adults absolutely DO cry! I’m a grown man and I cry when I’M sad! Crying isn’t a bad thing to do!” My parents both shut up after that- I think they forgot he was even there and my stepdad just said his usual bs out of reflex. And as for the “I’m a grown man and I cry” thing, this was in a SUPER rural, redneck, good old boys area of northeast PA, like less than and hour from the NY boarder. The toxic masculinity is so strong there, you can practically smell it the moment you cross the county line. So for a grown man to admit that HE DOES CRY, it was a big thing for me since I grew up surrounded by “men don’t cry” bs. I don’t remember his name, but I’ll never forget that moment. It’s when I realized WHY being punished and threatened with physical harm for crying when I was sad or scared or overwhelmed was so wrong. Everyone feels these things and crying to let out those feeling isn’t a bad thing.
Anyone who says "ignore them and they'll go away" or "just ask/tell them to stop and they will..." Has obviously never been kicked down and harassed. Sometimes you have to kick back harder, sometimes you have to go to authorities. And sometimes authorities are useless. So sometimes you have to plant your feet and hit back. "Violence is never the answer." Look, sometimes the only way to end conflict is to clock someone. Once it's done, don't keep on offense. But this idea that force isn't ever an option teaches people that they should just be floor mats, since constantly acquiescing is your only way out of conflict. Be willing to do what you have to do to get yourself out of a bad situation. Don't go out looking for fights, but if a fight takes you in, end it the quickest way you can and move past it.
Ugh I was picked on so badly in middle school and the vice principal ALWAYS told me to just ignore them. There was only 1 teacher who wanted to help me and in a school where “the teachers are specially trained to know how to handle bullies,” she didn’t know what to do. I was only at the school for 6th and 7th grade because after hitting a kid who kept picking on me with a book multiple times, I was labeled “dangerously unstable” and put in a specialized therapy program at another school for 8th grade. I came back for high school despite VERY MUCH not wanting too and some people were still @$$holes.
@@Void_TheDemon yeah it was bed. But the saddest part was… I always would rather be at school despite it being a hellhole because the bullying it got at home was worse.
"That while they are special, they are not any more special than anyone else" I would change this for... "That while they are special, no one really cares if you are 'special' or not." You SHOULD think you are special, since if you don't...others will take that for granted and rush to whoever is 'special'. Instead, be mindful that no one cares and put yourself as special. That will make people assume you mean the shit you say.
There are kids in middle school bulling other young kids for not being sexually active or having girlfriends. I had a child around 10-12 brag to me on the bus that she was an online sugar baby and that all the guys wanted her. I’ve never been so uncomfortable
I’ve heard children repeat things they hear outside of their home then create words from nothing and if they get a reaction from it will repeat for weeks on end. Don’t assume it’s shitty parents exposing their children to adult content.
Agree on forced apologies. Everyone knows that it's glorified performance theater and the one doing the apologizing is only sorry for getting caught and punished, not for actually hurting someone else.
We need to stop teaching children that there is an invisible white skin colored man who lives in the sky who loves them and if they don't act exactly in every possible way the invisible man wants them to act and bow down and bend their knees and worship this white skin colored invisible man in the sky while also loving them while at the same time begging for their forgiveness every day for their entire lives than they will be put into a fire after they die to burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever beyond even the end of time and it will be their fault...oh....and the invisible white skin colored man in the sky also loves and then is the perfect example of what goodness is.
The without headphones one omfg especially with kids ‘it’s rude cause they can’t hear when I talk to them’ no it’s rude that everyone else has to listen to whatever they’re watching and talking isn’t the only way to communicate with someone you could do something else to get their attention
FINALLY! Someone actually points out the fact that “ignore the bully and it’ll pass” is a shitty message. I’m the only one I’ve seen who says it. I was bullied and was a sensitive kid. I was told “if you ignore the bully they’ll go away” to a kid this translates to “severely repress emotions and not show any emotional reaction because that’s how you fix problems in life. Now I’ll have an argument that I think “yeah I’m emotionally sound relating to this despite the fact it has brought about a major change in who I’ll spend time with. I know this and am ok with it since I am no longer around a toxic friend group” then start talking about it in a safe place (therapy) and just start sobbing. Why? Because young kids learn stuff that’ll last their lifetime and develop habits that are very hard to break. The lesson I learned was emotions are a pain in the butt and don’t help solve problems so I should internalize them.
Though that is almost always the case, there are a few cases where ignoring it will make it go away. I speak from experience. If its physical, thatll never work.
True. Still think standing up for yourself or going to tell a trusted adult is a better lesson. I’d be far better off if instead of being taught to repress emotions I was taught to tell a teacher. One time in elementary school we had bullies because we played a role play game (it was higher grade elementary, 5th- 6th grade I think) we all decided to ignore it, the bullying continued all year. One day the bully group all rallied together (around 15-20 snobby girls) and held up “anti wolf” signs they’d made since it was a wolf role play. We ignored them for the first ten minutes of recess. It was a 15 minute recess. Eventually I said “y’all this isn’t working can we please go tell a teacher so we can enjoy the final 5 minutes?” And they still said to ignore them. I was angers at this point and said “fine you ignore them, imma go tell a teacher because they aren’t leaving” and guess what? They left as soon as a teacher approached… since then I’ve dealt with bullies using mostly quick retorts because the assholes can’t stand being hurt back. If “you’re a nerd” “if reading a chapter book seems nerdy to you, you should probably go back to elementary school to learn to read bigger books then Gerald and Piggy” if this type of reply doesn’t work I’m rolling my eyes and walking away, closer to a teacher, if the bully comes back despite the teacher I’m making sure the teacher knows. If I just ignored the bully and kept reading my book I’d chill there deeply upset by the bullies words but fearing giving them a reaction. I’d be better off if I never tried to do the ignoring strategy, I’d have fewer bullies AND I wouldn’t get into toxic relationships because I’m emotionally distant and don’t notice that I’m upset by what people are doing. But yes I agree is some instances simply ignoring the bully can help.
@@notarobot1231 As a former preschool and kindergarten bully (probably due to my severe social awkwardness at the time) and as someone who was bullied from 1st - 9th grade, I completely agree with you. Ignoring the problem didn't make me any less of a bully or make me get bullied any less and probably ended up worsening it.
That authorities are your first and last result in response to physical violence. (teachers, parents, police, etc) They will (generally) not be there when someone is being violent towards you. They will (unfortunately) often be unable to prevent future violence towards you after you've reported the first incident. I learned in school that the only way to stop people from pushing you around was to throw hands every single time things got even slightly physical. This resulted in a net total of less violence AND less detention, because the school had a zero tolerance policy where everyone got detention any time there was violence. Not the best practice in adult life, since people are a lot better at hurting each other, but it's important to keep in the back of your mind that you need to remove YOUSELF from situations, not hope that someone else will do so for you before you get hurt. Keep in shape. Know how to at least throw a punch without fucking up your hand. Learn to run at a decent pace. Calling 911 is always important, but it will take a couple minutes before anyone gets there to solve anything. I've seen pedestrians hit by cars less than 50m from a fire station and it still took minutes for help to arrive. Edit for the active shooter comment: I don't know what the drills are in the states, but they're getting close to actively harmful here in Canada. The policy is that you close the blinds, turn out the lights, lock the door, put a trash bag over the window on the door, and hide in the corner, and don't respond to *anything* until the door is opened by police or school administration. There are problems with every element of this except for closing the blinds and locking the door, as far as I can tell. Turning out the lights is pointless, because you're putting a trash bag over the window on the door *which is never done except when there's people inside the room.* Hiding in the corner is pointless, because you've eliminated any way to see into the room, and you're giving the person who presumably has a **RANGED WEAPON** as much distance as you can afford them. Not responding to anything is problematic, because they don't acknowledge that it's even possible for someone to force the door open, or to steal a master key from any member of staff. We ought to be physically barricading the door on the assumption that the lock is worthless, and passing out whatever's heavy enough to hurt when thrown (dictionaries?). If someone breaks that door down the class needs to be anything but a helpless ball of unarmed people in the corner. Under current drills, if the shooter gets a hold of a school key or can shoot the lock out on a door, no class gives any resistance at all to them. Alternatively, they could have to break the door down despite the lock being compromised, and have 20+ books thrown at them the second they set foot in the classroom, followed by at least some attempt to fight back.
Thise who say "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" had never been hit by a dictionary:D I like how that was the heavy thing you thought of.
That they have to share their belongings. I'm saying this as someone who seriously hated sharing things when I was a lot younger. I hated sharing so much to the point where once when I was 5 years old and at summer camp, some other girl who was 4 at the time was drying off with my towel without my permission because she forgot to bring her towel that day. This made me super angry. I then proceeded to walk up to her, then walked to the back of the chair she was sitting on, and pulled it backwards as hard and fast as my little body could. As soon as she hit the ground on her back and started crying, I immediately snatched my towel off of her, wrapped it around me, and proceeded to dry off with it. It's been over a decade since the incident and to this day, I have absolutely no regrets over what I did. That girl completely deserved it for touching my property without my permission. Also, I'm listening to the song "My Fist, Your Mouth, Her Scars" as I'm typing this, lol.
We need to stop teaching that drag shows and drag queens are appropriate for children when the whole theme of a drag show is inherently sexual. Every one I’ve been to was sexual. They had that little boy Desmond dancing on stage for dollars from grown adults like a stripper. I feel so bad for my cousin my aunts are married (one of them bio) and I feel like their daughter tries so hard to be accepted by them and came out as lesbian and non binary I suspect for that reason (maybe not) but according to them she loooves drag queens so much they had to hire them for her 16th bday party.. where there were toddlers and kids of all ages that were encouraged to hand out dollars to the DG’s.. They had ppl from the crowd come up and dirty dance with them in front of everyone. Lol showing them moves like humping the floor and they had to copy. Including my 16 yr old cousin and her friends. Children are legit being openly sexualized in this country and so many ppl are just accepting it. The funniest part of this is that I’m bi and I’ve cross dressed so I’m not even being a bigot I just think it’s inappropriate for children.
“Do whatever it takes to be happy!” I promise it won’t stay happy if you have to stomp on others to get there! Actions have consequences and we can’t just do whatever we want in life.
Parents never told me "I'll tell the doctor to give you a shot if you don't behave." And I ended up being the calmest kid while getting vaccines etc. Even now I'm not even scared of blood
Same. Heck my mom told me the truth about the shots. "Yes, it will hurt a little, but that's alright. A little hurt now is to keep you from catching something later that could hurt you more. Just be braver than my sister and then I'll let you have a soda at lunch." There's a story about my mom being taken with her sister and some of her sister's classmates to get vaccinated for Polio and my mom (two years younger than the other girls) were freaked out over the little bit of blood. Then again, my mom also made it a point to desensitize me toward blood at an early age by taking me with her to donate blood and the phlebotomists made it a point to describe the process and let me know the things the blood could be used for. Now I give every three month since I finally have the weight to do so
The forced apology things, I always hated, even before I found out that it’s not nice to say your sorry if you don’t mean it. The 2 times I was forced to apologize I made it obvious it was forced. “My mom told me I had to apologize, so sorry about what I did. Are you happy now mom?” And I made sure to exaggerate the “I’m sorry” so it was like “I’m So SoRrY i HuRt YoU” and even used air quotes around the word “sorry.” That was how I convinced my mom not to force me to go on walks I REALLY didn’t want to go on. I HATED going for walks with my mom, stepdad, and little sister (stepdad’s bio kid, my half sister). I’ve always been out of shape- hard to stay in shape when you grow up at the tail end of the food pyramid bs and having pasta, potatoes, and fried foods shoveled down your throat by your mom, who also would tell the dr “idk why she’s so overweight, we eat health and don’t have any snacks in the house,” completely forget the DISHWASHER WE USED AS A SNACK CUPBOARD AND ALWAYS KEPT STOCKED WITH LITTLE DEBBIES, yeah so hard to understand. So I can’t walk for very long before I need a break. Well, my family would get so upset with me if I stopped walking. We lived on a back road that was lucky enough to see 1 car that wasn’t a resident’s drive through and I knew my road safety very well, so the COULD have gone on a head of me, but the CHOSE to stay with me and complain until I started walking again or just force me to keep walking. I was 10, so I was old enough to be left alone with my DS and the tv for a half hour and not burn the house down. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to walk, I just didn’t want to walk with THEM because they made the experience miserable, and after years of that bs, I now just hate walking in general. Anyway, my stepdad wasn’t home, so I thought5hat since their excuses to not leave me on the side of the road when I got tired was “family bonding,” that meant we wouldn’t have to go. I was wrong. My mom forced me to go. So,I made her promise me that we would got at MY pace and I would lead, no one would be allowed to go ahead of me. She rolled her eyes and said ok. My sister was riding around on her bike and kept going ahead of me. I told my mom “this wasn’t in our deal, I’ll go home if you don’t stop her.” My mom rolled her eyes and told me to shut up and keep walking. So the next time my sister rode ahead of me, I ran up to her bike when she was slowing down and jump kicked the back tire, making her fall. My mom screamed at me to apologize to my sister and that’s when I was like “I’m (air quotes) So SoRrY (air quotes) i HuRt YoU.” Mom was pissed, we went home and I was sent to my room, but she never forced me to go on a walk if my stepdad wasn’t home. And apparently she wasn’t pissed enough to tell him what happened when he came home because I know for a fact if he knew I hurt his precious biological daughter who can do no wrong, I would have been beat. And consider how often she would hit, kick, and spit on me back then (and be allowed to get away with it because Golden Children can do no wrong), I only feel guilty about hurting her when my beef was with my mom, not for hurting her in general.
To have depression is not the same to control your emotions. To control your emotions is when you act less aggressive toward other people. Most people with depression do not hurt other people.
Being a child growing up in the phils minimum requirement is that you learn to play an instrument any instrument but for class needs to be a piano. So piano lessons after class. High school came made me sign up for school band spent all summer learning to play the saxophone
As someone who's not very religious I don't see an issue with teaching religion at a young age at all, as it may teach them about ethics and to develop strong morals. I honestly don't see how their could be any negative impact of teaching religion to children.
@@gabepelletier3602 to me, religion is just a waste of an individual’s life and one doesn’t need religion to learn ethics. The so called good religion has to offer can be demonstrated outside of the religion.
@@idreadFell365 I agree you don’t need religion to teach those things that we both agree are important to the development of a child but I would argue it’s a good catalyst for good development
Had a neighbor girl that was a bully, she bullied her younger sister, her younger brother, and boys in the neighborhood, thought she could go around punching and hitting boys, and the boys could do nothing. After she was punching me I pushed her so hard she fell over backward she teared up but did not really cry, her father told her that should be a lesson for her to not be a bully because you never know how someone might react
9:28 Exactly. Like... as a kid, I *loved* learning about the human body - it was one of several areas of interest I'd call "my Pokémon". If kids don't even like learning that, they'll *hate* learning taxes, at least until the government makes them simple and easy to file.
11:38 I'd say, collective punishment is acceptable, when it is properly set. But when it's just "it is he who failed, but you all who will suffer" without any ways for team to sort out things with failmate - man, you just made your wards angry without _relatively_ zero consequences for failmate.
On the other hand though, it often creates an environment of self-policing. People pretty quickly resent being punished for someone else's mistake and so they prevent the offender from doing it again.
"That mistakes should be punished" This one is true. As the oldest child, I often got punished for things that my youngest brother (10 year difference) doesn't get punished for, because parents grow too, they learn how to parent. An example is when a few years ago, we were working on the house. My mom was painting and my little brother saw that. Him being a 3/4 year old at the time, wanted to do what his mama did. But obviously they wouldn't let him help in the house. So what did he do? He grabbed a marker and started coloring almost every surface in the toilet. Mom found this and was not happy, obviously, but all she did was explain why he shouldn't do that and then she just cleaned it. I would've gotten hit *hard* if I did something like that 10+ years ago
6:26 I have a theory that the reason we learn this rule is because when we're first learning to read and write the words with that letter combination often do follow the rule, so it just helps kids remember the order of the vowels while they're still getting the hang of written language
16:38 Personally, as a kid, I just assumed the toy ads were for the parents, to give them ideas as to what to buy their kids, so I didn't ask for anything as I just assumed Mum would also see the ad and buy that thing for me eventually.
I've experienced bad teacher moments in elementary school when they don't want to help their own students with whatever confusing assignments. Instead, those teachers automatically took advantage of any "prodigy" students of the class to assist their confused classmates. That never solved anything at the end because the students were assigned to complete their own assignments, not stop at random and tutor either of their confused classmates.
I can advocate that being called good-looking by grandparents etc. as a very plump kid was not helping me at all. And instead just made me put on more pounds with false self confidence for a hot minute. Till I learned I was pretty darn overweight when i got on a scale. No one was around to lie to me then.
18:50 I think they're saying you have a greater than 0 chance if you work hard. With that said, I am tackling this issue in my comic, so... yeah. That's as much as I can say without spoiling anything, so you'll just have to wait till it's out, sorry. Oh crap, did I just gratuitously use the word "sorry"? Well, you get what I'm saying.
I feel it's still necessary to forgive people or it just hurts you. What you shouldn't do is forget what they did and become a victim to their relapsing behaviors.
I don't know if I agree with some of these. The special one. Special is a spectrum depending on how you view someone they will always surpass you and you may never be able to do what they are doing or at least to the same degree. The point isn't being a copy but doing what you can do or being satisfied with that. If you can't then well you might not have a future or a good one. ~ 2nd: Perfect means different things to different people. ~~ 3rd:
9:47 Well, 16 year olds don't care about the other stuff you teach them as well. So rather teach them taxes. Also if you went to high school, why not teach the 18 year olds? With 18 we had a class called social sciences. We got to learn about our laws and our politicans. It was a waste of time memorizing were blablabla was born and what blablabla is working as right now and what news say about blablabla . So there was the perfect timing to actually teach us about insurances and taxes.
Even if they dont care now they will. Even if they arent paying attention some of it will stick. I wish I was taught how to do my taxes in school, cause even if I dont need to worry about it now (grandfather owns a tax business), I did for a while.
It was mentioned about boys not being able to cry or show weakness and how that follows them into adulthood... what we don't talk about is anger. Anger is a natural human emotion that needs to be felt and experienced like anything else... so why don't we talk about the consequences of pushing all of that down, even though we all instinctively know what the consequences will be? The worst is how this follows you into adulthood. If you are a man, and you get angry, people will FREAK THE FUCK OUT. It is never acceptable for a man to be angry, and there are almost ALWAYS consequences even if you have a legitimate reason to feel a natural human emotion, and even if you didn't threaten anyone, don't take something out on someone else, don't curse, and don't harm anyone. Doesn't matter; you are seen a potential murder, rapist, child molester, etc. You are not a person but a potential threat that needs to be dealt with. No... I'm not visually expressing anger because I'm going to hurt you, I am experiencing the anger so I DON'T hurt you. If I wanted to hurt you we wouldn't be talking... I would have just done it. So for those of you who are not a man, imagine your ENTIRE LIFE being forced to push all that rage down because you can't show it; not acceptable ESPECIALLY for boys. Now you are a man; there are so many double standards and legitimate grievances to have... but no one takes them serious and no one cares; now people get off on watching others suffer to boot, and they don't care who sees. If you show emotion, you are deemed "weak." If you don't, everyone treats you as if you do not have emotions, even though you are just as much a human being as the person beside you. Eventually something has to give, and then everyone wonders "why" when a teen/man finally snaps.
a weard sugestion but... teaching both kids and adults that if you consume something or own something it should not be your identifying feature or your personality nor should you judge others by the same principle. like if you drink energy drink you are into a certain lifestyle, if you listen to certain music, own a certain car, etc. I've seen people change their opinion on others just by these little details, my sister was in a race, and sponsors at the end gave participants energy drinks, latter her friends saw her drinking it and immediately got into a health freak argument about how that is bad and my sister got self-conscious, it was maybe a third time in her entire life that she had one of those, she doesn't even drink coffee.
14:30 Also... do they not even explain what sex *is* when teaching abstinence only? Because that defeats the purpose of teaching abstinence. It's like saying "no swimming at the beach" and not even explaining what swimming is.
Whatever it is we're teaching instead of critical thinking. I know a number of otherwise functional adults who are unable to understand that horoscopes, 9/11 conspiracies, crystal resonance therapy, and other things are utterly without merit or credibility.
I know that this was kinda covered in the vid but please teach kids to show that they like someone by being nice. Even if they aren't mean, being annoying is not good either. I had a boy that would mess with me constantly in grade school and the teacher just brushed it off. Him taking my books from my desk or sitting in my assigned seat when the teacher expected us to be ready to start was so irritating. I just wanted to learn and talk to friends at the time. Plus, me telling him stop did nothing and it did end up in a situation where I smacked his chest because he touched my butt. I felt bad after, but he pushed too far. Thankfully it was a small short spat and no one got in trouble. People might think I'm wrong, and that he should have been in trouble.... But I feel like it was a boundary lesson that he finally learned. If anything I'm particularly mad my teacher didn't step in more other than moving his seat once the seating order changed. He did stop teasing and we were still friends after. ....Taylor, I get it now, but you sucked for that. Hopefully you teach your kids better
1:34 Thats not completely true. Yes, around 90% of the time that is the case but sometimes bullies will stop if you ignore them. I was bullied myself, and that is actually what stopped it. 11:55 Can be a good or bad thing. It shouldnt, but collective punishment is something the military does, so it could get them used to that if they end up joining.
That it's not funny to torment your siblings. I was the oldest and used to torment my siblings. Not bad enough for them to hate me or hold a grudge. But still it wasn't cool and it's not funny
14:36 I plan to tell my kids correct anatomy names in age appropriate was from a young age. And when they reach puberty, they’ll get a full sex talk with videos from RUclips gynecologists to help explain things more. And I’ll be telling them I don’t care if the have sex, just follow certain rules. Proper consent from all parties involved, keep doors closed with a sock or something on the knob so no one walks in on you, I’ll buy you whatever protection you want just use it and use it correctly, you see a doctor about your activities regularly just to stay safe, and don’t be afraid to come to me with any questions or concerns you may have, even if it’s an accidental pregnancy, I’ll help you figure out whatever’s wrong without judgement, just come to me about it. I want my kids to be safe, but I know that putting them in a box will only make them be sneaky and I would rather know my child is sexually active and feels comfortable coming to me than force them to be sneaky and be blindsided when someone accidentally gets pregnant. And I see condoms (both male and female) as medically important as birth control pills, probably even a little more so since bc prevents pregnancy and condoms prevent pregnancy and the spread of certain diseases, so no way in hell am I leaving it up to my child to use their allowance to pay for cheep rubbers or whatever protection they decide to use. I’ll pay for the good quality stuff so that I at least have peace of mind, even if they aren’t mature enough to care about quality. And any daughters I have will likely already be on bc because of my family history of PCOS, so giving them a little extra protection wouldn’t hurt. I see no downsides to having open and comfortable communication with your children about these things. If my kid gets a rash down there, I would rather they tell me and we go to the doctor just to find out it’s poison Ivy or something then for them to keep quiet about the painful bumps that suddenly started appearing after a “fun time” and it turn out to be something serious. That’s how parents lose kids to preventable issues.
i kno im prolly gonna be attacked for asking this but... whats with all these video thumbnails that have something to do with LGBTQ, then you put a title that suggests you are against LGBTQ? are you against LGBTQ?
It's to get a reaction so people click on the video. It really does need to stop. The thumbnails should contain contents pertaining to the contents of the actual video.
14:18 I mean... as a kid, I thought sex was done *only* for reproduction, so I naturally abstained well into my teenage years (and am still a virgin to this day).
That everyone’s a winner and everyone’s creative. These two are the most annoying ones. Like no creativity is so rare it’s not even funny. And no not every body is a winner, you shouldn’t get a trophy for “participating” that just sets a low standard cause no matter how horrible you are you still rewarded
I'm all for being what makes you happy, but I feel like children growing up in this day and age are taught, whether directly or indirectly, that having either a gender or sexuality crisis growing up is what is normal and everyone else is changing their genders and sexualities so they'll be out of place if they don't. I know I didn't word that the best way but I feel where we are societally is genuinely confusing children into feeling like they have to change what/who they are. I don't think children in most cases are capable of making that decision
I think if even if that were the case, this is no reason to deny peoples gender/sexual identity. I’ve seen this argument used so many times to invalidate queer and gender diverse people. I also think that this is because we are (generally) living in a world that is more accepting and people feel more safe to explore gender/sexual identity
@@Bettyhtespaghetti I agree this is a more accepting world and I love that that's the case. I have absolutely nothing against queer or gender diverse people and am even a part of the LGBTQ+ community myself. I simply don't agree with a decision to use gender affirming procedures or medications at such a young age, it's not that I flat out don't agree with it at all. A lot of children that experience gender dysphoria do end up growing out of it (I understand that not all of them do) and I've seen a lot of trans people talking about how even with reversal the effects are never truly gone, that's why I feel that way. I do still feel that when you start growing up in a world with such a large amount of people being a certain way, it's normal that you'd have feelings that align with it until either you grow out of it or you realize that it's who you truly are. I realize how my previous comment comes across, and I definitely could have explained myself a lot better, my bad. If you still don't agree, I apologize, but everyone's opinion is different
That being anything besides straight is wrong. The adult will literally force knowledge on being gay and other stuff in the childs mind and won't let them experience life and figure it out for themselves. For the LGBTQers out there.
I disagree with the "it's okay to not forgive someone" idea. Forgiveness is for your own benefit, not the person who wronged you. We should teach children how to forgive so they don't live with the constant hate and negativity but to stop associating with the people who continue to wrong them... that's just stupid
They need to stop showing videos of adults assaulting employees just because the business is out of whatever item they want. I fear that it's teaching kids that it's okay to be abusive to someone because you aren't getting your way. I understand you're angry that they're out of chicken nuggets but please don't get violent towards other people!
@@PlagueVirus2001 nvm I am completely confused with this reply. At first you say that 🚗✨Facts don’t cars✨🚗 , and then tell trans people to get a sex change
Honestly stop teaching them about slavery. Hear me out as a Latino not going to say racism doesn't exist but imagine learning you were owned by someone whose skin is like your best friend. That was so mind blowing as a kid and immediately makes you look at the world differently.
Those are historical events that happened and you need to learn from to avoid. It shouldn't just disappear from the curriculum because it made you uncomfortably
@@vulpes7079 it's not about being uncomfortable it's about warping minds. Black people are Latinos too they aren't treated in Latin American countries like they are in America.
My mother taught me that if a woman thinks she's man enough to hit a man. She's man enough to get hit back by a man. Never used this but it stuck with me.
*INHALES* EQUAL RIGHTS EQUAL FIGHTS
When I was a kid, one of my sisters used to pick fights with me and she had no problem punching me as hard as she could. Eventually, I retaliated. My parents go so sick of us fighting, they just said if no blood was spilled, nobody got punished. To this day, I have the attitude that if you hit me, I get to hit you back. I don't care what your gender is. Never in my adult life have I hit anyone, because I don't like getting into fights.
I feel like the term equal rights equal fight Applies to more that just the “you can’t hit girls.” It’s the idea that if rights are equal, then nobody should get something more but also TC Sam, I agree with you on that, I think that if someone does something to you then you can do it back to them equally.
Don’t roll in the mud with pigs, u do have a duty to retreat if possible. Not legal advice. But I do believe I’ve heard this for several self defense cases in different states in the US. And personally I’m saying do not go back
Yeah, that’s what I plan to teach my kids when I have them. “Don’t start fights, but if someone starts one with you, finish it.” Child self-defense classes will probably be something I have them try. And I do plan to tell the school when I start enrolling that if someone hits my kid, I don’t give a flying frick what the rules say, my kid is hitting back- twice as hard if there’s one of those stupid “zero tolerance” policies because if my kid’s going to get into trouble for defending themselves, they’re gonna make sure to leave a lasting make.
That real men don't cry. I think that's easily one of the meanest things you can say to a small boy.
I don't think that was explicitly told to me as a child, but growing up in the late 70's and 80's, the message of "Boys don't cry" was definitely drilled into me. So much so, that the only time anyone has seen me cry in the last 40 years was when my I was talking to my girlfriend after finding out about my father's cancer diagnosis. Even then, I felt embarrassed and ashamed.
My little brother is and always has been a pretty sensitive kid. Our parents are pretty good about teaching about expressing emotions in a healthy way and how to be vulnerable, and are strongly against the message that boys don't cry. He's one of the kindest, most empathetic people I've seen, and he can bring a smile to almost anyone. Instead of teaching little boys that they should never cry, teach them about healthy ways to express emotions, because everyone has them regardless of gender.
Nah , then you just end up with a bunch of weak crybabies
@@jebes909090 like you! it is bad to tell someone
"your feelings are invalid", it makes people bottle up their emotions, which is very harmful, one reason is that it can increase already bad feeling about ones self. i am a man and i have a soft heart and make others around me smile. lets say i get my leg cut off, am i supposed to "walk it off" or do i get my leg fixed? answer is number two. i am VERY emotional and when i stub my toe i don't start crying. men have feelings too
@@tcsam73 I'm sorry to hear about your father's illness. And anyway don't be ashamed about crying about that! It shows that you love your father very much and hated for anything bad to happen to him.
I know it's sadly true in some areas, but that'll they be punished for using self defense.
In fact every area that has a stipulation on using self defense like the retreat clause needs to be removed.
The criminal is the one who decided to do wrong. Why are we being scrutinized for fighting back and not making them feel more powerful?
I'm a younger sibling, so naturally, things were handed to me. This lead to me not having the level of knowledge my brother did when he was my age. This caused a bunch of issues like me not being able to make quick and rational decisions and giving up on trying something. Whenever I asked for help, I'd get the "wHeN I WaS YoUr aGe i kNeW HoW To dO ThAt" lecture. I'd then ask to let me do it by myself and correct me when I go wrong, but then they would take over and just do it for me anyways. If you're a parent or an older sibling, don't do this. If your child or sibling comes for help, help them, but let them take charge in whatever they're trying to do. This well help them learn it a lot faster and prevent so many pointless arguments.
I'd also like to add that teaching kids not to talk back is so stupid. The kids have their side of the story too, and preventing them from saying that causes more harm than good.
Agree agree agree. So am y things I didn’t know that I could have easily.
YES. Teaching blind obedience to authority is dangerous, especially in this day and age.
My dad has that hangup on talking back. My sister was timid when Dad yelled but I would've just argued with him!
3:40 I'm a firm believer in rejecting forced apologies, they are no better than a lie. They aren't actually sorry.
4:35 I thought I was crazy to think being told to apologize and accept an apology was essentially forced. That never taught me anything except if I fake one I can pretty much get away relatively scott free. Though I've probably never done it. Then again my memory sucks.
Forgive and forget but why should they get off Scott free, because people are lazy and won’t do something about it.
I only ever faked an apology twice because in my life and I made ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that both the recipient and my mom know it was forced, I didn’t mean it, and I didn’t like doing it. Mom stopped forcing me to apologize after the second time because I basically told the person (a family friend and my mom is all about appearing like the perfect person and mother) “my mom told me to apologize to you, so I’m sorry, I guess. Happy now mom?”
Yes so many times on the forced apologies. I absolutely hate hearing someone say "now go say you're sorry" or "I'm expecting an apology".
That apology is not genuine and feels more insulting than not apologizing.
You’re right but it’s teaching kids to say sorry when they are wrong in a situation they wouldn’t think to bc they don’t know yet. Idk another way to accomplish that but now, as an adult, I say sorry for everything even when I didn’t do anything wrong.
@@starquaked you teach them by explaining why what they did is wrong and teaching them to have empathy for other people. If your kid his
Stacy another kid, rather than say “we don’t hit, say you’re sorry” you say “hitting isn’t nice, how would you feel if someone hit you? You’d feel bad right? That’s how that little kid feels.” You can SUGGEST apologizing, “hey buddy, we know why hitting is wrong. Maybe you should say you’re sorry because that really wasn’t nice. How would you feel if someone did that to you?” But telling a child to apologize or be punished is wrong.
@@alexismyers6053 I like that honestly thank you because I’ve never felt right about forcing my son to apologize
@@starquaked yeah, a kid may not think to apologize because they’re kids, but they shouldn’t be forced. Part of a parent’s job is to teach empathy so kids don’t grow up to be uncaring towards their fellow living beings.
The “group punishment” thing made me remember something, I was in around second grade. I came home to my mom crying that I didn’t get recess. She said “oh no why not?” “Some kids did (stupid shit I don’t remember) so the entire grade had to skip recess and instead the teachers gave us a lesson on being respectful for our space” this wasn’t just a teacher level group punishment, the principal was directly involved. Well lucky for the second grade class that year, my mom knows a lot of other moms(I was a social kid and my mom met all my friends moms and they all made friends and it was a small town), some of whom were very important in the school. She told all her mom friends who asked their kids and after confirming they told all their mom friends until every mom who had a second grader knew. Principal was under so much pressure from all the moms she had to come out and admit she was wrong in her group punishment decision. I don’t remember what she did that stopped the parents anger but I think there was some sort of apology gift to all the kids so that the kids would stop reporting her shit to their parents.
Basically, with exceptions, we need to start teaching kids the concept of nuance.
As a child my dad always told me men don't cry, after he went to Iraq he would instead say "it's ok to cry, we all have our moments."
Finally had him open up to what changed him years after I had enlisted and became a civilian EMT.
Thats...hope hes doing ok...
The only time I've ever seen Dad cry was when our dog died. I feel he was probably taught about the men don't cry nonsense when he was young.
My @$$hole stepfather ALWAYS told me “adults don’t cry” even when I was a little girl that just fell down and got hurt. I’m an emotional person, so I cry at the drop of a hat. Like, even now as an almost 30 year old woman, I THINK of something sad and I get tears eyed. When I was around 8/9/10, we went to the movie theater and while waiting for the theater we would be seeing the movie in to open up, I played the skill crane and won a toy. While I did that an old friend of my parents recognized them and they stared talking. He was nice to me, so immediately liked him. Well, we get seated for our movie and I was playing with my cheap toy when I noticed a loose thread. I pulled it off and caused a good sized tear in the seam, which made me start to cry because my mom and stepdad always told me that if I break my toys they’ll be thrown away. My stepdad saw me crying and, in front of their friend, told me to stop crying or he’ll give me a reason to cry, adults don’t cry! I’ll never forge5 the look of absolute shock and horror on this guys face before he said (to my parents as much as to me) “adults absolutely DO cry! I’m a grown man and I cry when I’M sad! Crying isn’t a bad thing to do!” My parents both shut up after that- I think they forgot he was even there and my stepdad just said his usual bs out of reflex. And as for the “I’m a grown man and I cry” thing, this was in a SUPER rural, redneck, good old boys area of northeast PA, like less than and hour from the NY boarder. The toxic masculinity is so strong there, you can practically smell it the moment you cross the county line. So for a grown man to admit that HE DOES CRY, it was a big thing for me since I grew up surrounded by “men don’t cry” bs. I don’t remember his name, but I’ll never forget that moment. It’s when I realized WHY being punished and threatened with physical harm for crying when I was sad or scared or overwhelmed was so wrong. Everyone feels these things and crying to let out those feeling isn’t a bad thing.
Anyone who says "ignore them and they'll go away" or "just ask/tell them to stop and they will..."
Has obviously never been kicked down and harassed. Sometimes you have to kick back harder, sometimes you have to go to authorities. And sometimes authorities are useless. So sometimes you have to plant your feet and hit back.
"Violence is never the answer."
Look, sometimes the only way to end conflict is to clock someone. Once it's done, don't keep on offense. But this idea that force isn't ever an option teaches people that they should just be floor mats, since constantly acquiescing is your only way out of conflict.
Be willing to do what you have to do to get yourself out of a bad situation. Don't go out looking for fights, but if a fight takes you in, end it the quickest way you can and move past it.
Ugh I was picked on so badly in middle school and the vice principal ALWAYS told me to just ignore them. There was only 1 teacher who wanted to help me and in a school where “the teachers are specially trained to know how to handle bullies,” she didn’t know what to do. I was only at the school for 6th and 7th grade because after hitting a kid who kept picking on me with a book multiple times, I was labeled “dangerously unstable” and put in a specialized therapy program at another school for 8th grade. I came back for high school despite VERY MUCH not wanting too and some people were still @$$holes.
@@alexismyers6053 that's awful! I'm sorry you had to deal with that
@@Void_TheDemon yeah it was bed. But the saddest part was… I always would rather be at school despite it being a hellhole because the bullying it got at home was worse.
"That while they are special, they are not any more special than anyone else"
I would change this for...
"That while they are special, no one really cares if you are 'special' or not."
You SHOULD think you are special, since if you don't...others will take that for granted and rush to whoever is 'special'. Instead, be mindful that no one cares and put yourself as special. That will make people assume you mean the shit you say.
There are kids in middle school bulling other young kids for not being sexually active or having girlfriends. I had a child around 10-12 brag to me on the bus that she was an online sugar baby and that all the guys wanted her. I’ve never been so uncomfortable
That being nice and a decent human being in life is a sign of weakness. It is simply not true.
Did someone teach you this or did you assume this?
I’m sorry but the “behold the mighty pen15” has me dying of laughter
I’ve heard children repeat things they hear outside of their home then create words from nothing and if they get a reaction from it will repeat for weeks on end. Don’t assume it’s shitty parents exposing their children to adult content.
Agree on forced apologies. Everyone knows that it's glorified performance theater and the one doing the apologizing is only sorry for getting caught and punished, not for actually hurting someone else.
We need to stop teaching children that there is an invisible white skin colored man who lives in the sky who loves them and if they don't act exactly in every possible way the invisible man wants them to act and bow down and bend their knees and worship this white skin colored invisible man in the sky while also loving them while at the same time begging for their forgiveness every day for their entire lives than they will be put into a fire after they die to burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever beyond even the end of time and it will be their fault...oh....and the invisible white skin colored man in the sky also loves and then is the perfect example of what goodness is.
You're right, we should stop teaching children this. He's Middle Eastern, not white.
I love that psychologists have been compiling religious trauma syndrome.
I absolutely agree with this 100 percent
Who ever teach this?
Got deep pretty quick
The without headphones one omfg especially with kids ‘it’s rude cause they can’t hear when I talk to them’ no it’s rude that everyone else has to listen to whatever they’re watching and talking isn’t the only way to communicate with someone you could do something else to get their attention
FINALLY! Someone actually points out the fact that “ignore the bully and it’ll pass” is a shitty message. I’m the only one I’ve seen who says it. I was bullied and was a sensitive kid. I was told “if you ignore the bully they’ll go away” to a kid this translates to “severely repress emotions and not show any emotional reaction because that’s how you fix problems in life. Now I’ll have an argument that I think “yeah I’m emotionally sound relating to this despite the fact it has brought about a major change in who I’ll spend time with. I know this and am ok with it since I am no longer around a toxic friend group” then start talking about it in a safe place (therapy) and just start sobbing. Why? Because young kids learn stuff that’ll last their lifetime and develop habits that are very hard to break. The lesson I learned was emotions are a pain in the butt and don’t help solve problems so I should internalize them.
Though that is almost always the case, there are a few cases where ignoring it will make it go away. I speak from experience. If its physical, thatll never work.
True. Still think standing up for yourself or going to tell a trusted adult is a better lesson. I’d be far better off if instead of being taught to repress emotions I was taught to tell a teacher. One time in elementary school we had bullies because we played a role play game (it was higher grade elementary, 5th- 6th grade I think) we all decided to ignore it, the bullying continued all year. One day the bully group all rallied together (around 15-20 snobby girls) and held up “anti wolf” signs they’d made since it was a wolf role play. We ignored them for the first ten minutes of recess. It was a 15 minute recess. Eventually I said “y’all this isn’t working can we please go tell a teacher so we can enjoy the final 5 minutes?” And they still said to ignore them. I was angers at this point and said “fine you ignore them, imma go tell a teacher because they aren’t leaving” and guess what? They left as soon as a teacher approached… since then I’ve dealt with bullies using mostly quick retorts because the assholes can’t stand being hurt back. If “you’re a nerd” “if reading a chapter book seems nerdy to you, you should probably go back to elementary school to learn to read bigger books then Gerald and Piggy” if this type of reply doesn’t work I’m rolling my eyes and walking away, closer to a teacher, if the bully comes back despite the teacher I’m making sure the teacher knows. If I just ignored the bully and kept reading my book I’d chill there deeply upset by the bullies words but fearing giving them a reaction. I’d be better off if I never tried to do the ignoring strategy, I’d have fewer bullies AND I wouldn’t get into toxic relationships because I’m emotionally distant and don’t notice that I’m upset by what people are doing. But yes I agree is some instances simply ignoring the bully can help.
@@notarobot1231 As a former preschool and kindergarten bully (probably due to my severe social awkwardness at the time) and as someone who was bullied from 1st - 9th grade, I completely agree with you. Ignoring the problem didn't make me any less of a bully or make me get bullied any less and probably ended up worsening it.
The "not everyone likes you" thing hits home. Few people like me.
That its not okay to cry, everyone needs to cry.
We need to stop teaching them that they should believe something just because someone on TV and/or with a PhD said it.
One thing we DO need to teach kids is how to evaluate credibility by looking at how the information was gathered.
That authorities are your first and last result in response to physical violence. (teachers, parents, police, etc)
They will (generally) not be there when someone is being violent towards you.
They will (unfortunately) often be unable to prevent future violence towards you after you've reported the first incident.
I learned in school that the only way to stop people from pushing you around was to throw hands every single time things got even slightly physical.
This resulted in a net total of less violence AND less detention, because the school had a zero tolerance policy where everyone got detention any time there was violence.
Not the best practice in adult life, since people are a lot better at hurting each other, but it's important to keep in the back of your mind that you need to remove YOUSELF from situations, not hope that someone else will do so for you before you get hurt.
Keep in shape. Know how to at least throw a punch without fucking up your hand. Learn to run at a decent pace.
Calling 911 is always important, but it will take a couple minutes before anyone gets there to solve anything.
I've seen pedestrians hit by cars less than 50m from a fire station and it still took minutes for help to arrive.
Edit for the active shooter comment:
I don't know what the drills are in the states, but they're getting close to actively harmful here in Canada.
The policy is that you close the blinds, turn out the lights, lock the door, put a trash bag over the window on the door, and hide in the corner, and don't respond to *anything* until the door is opened by police or school administration.
There are problems with every element of this except for closing the blinds and locking the door, as far as I can tell.
Turning out the lights is pointless, because you're putting a trash bag over the window on the door *which is never done except when there's people inside the room.*
Hiding in the corner is pointless, because you've eliminated any way to see into the room, and you're giving the person who presumably has a **RANGED WEAPON** as much distance as you can afford them.
Not responding to anything is problematic, because they don't acknowledge that it's even possible for someone to force the door open, or to steal a master key from any member of staff.
We ought to be physically barricading the door on the assumption that the lock is worthless, and passing out whatever's heavy enough to hurt when thrown (dictionaries?). If someone breaks that door down the class needs to be anything but a helpless ball of unarmed people in the corner.
Under current drills, if the shooter gets a hold of a school key or can shoot the lock out on a door, no class gives any resistance at all to them.
Alternatively, they could have to break the door down despite the lock being compromised, and have 20+ books thrown at them the second they set foot in the classroom, followed by at least some attempt to fight back.
Thise who say "Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" had never been hit by a dictionary:D I like how that was the heavy thing you thought of.
I'm teaching Santa is for heart felt wishes then for material gains
That they have to share their belongings. I'm saying this as someone who seriously hated sharing things when I was a lot younger.
I hated sharing so much to the point where once when I was 5 years old and at summer camp, some other girl who was 4 at the time was drying off with my towel without my permission because she forgot to bring her towel that day. This made me super angry. I then proceeded to walk up to her, then walked to the back of the chair she was sitting on, and pulled it backwards as hard and fast as my little body could. As soon as she hit the ground on her back and started crying, I immediately snatched my towel off of her, wrapped it around me, and proceeded to dry off with it.
It's been over a decade since the incident and to this day, I have absolutely no regrets over what I did. That girl completely deserved it for touching my property without my permission. Also, I'm listening to the song "My Fist, Your Mouth, Her Scars" as I'm typing this, lol.
How is collapsing from emotion unacceptable? I'm so confused.
stop teaching kids the rules of what not to do in the subject of anti-bullying.
it always ironically makes it worse.
We need to stop teaching that drag shows and drag queens are appropriate for children when the whole theme of a drag show is inherently sexual. Every one I’ve been to was sexual. They had that little boy Desmond dancing on stage for dollars from grown adults like a stripper.
I feel so bad for my cousin my aunts are married (one of them bio) and I feel like their daughter tries so hard to be accepted by them and came out as lesbian and non binary I suspect for that reason (maybe not) but according to them she loooves drag queens so much they had to hire them for her 16th bday party.. where there were toddlers and kids of all ages that were encouraged to hand out dollars to the DG’s..
They had ppl from the crowd come up and dirty dance with them in front of everyone. Lol showing them moves like humping the floor and they had to copy. Including my 16 yr old cousin and her friends.
Children are legit being openly sexualized in this country and so many ppl are just accepting it.
The funniest part of this is that I’m bi and I’ve cross dressed so I’m not even being a bigot I just think it’s inappropriate for children.
8:33 As a kid, I thought it wasn't good to be sad *or* angry, or feel anything except happiness.
Sounds like Toxic Positivity to me!
That life fair... biggest lie I have ever been told
Who told you that? I’ve literally never heard anyone ever say “life is fair”.
I was told the opposite!
“Do whatever it takes to be happy!” I promise it won’t stay happy if you have to stomp on others to get there! Actions have consequences and we can’t just do whatever we want in life.
Parents never told me "I'll tell the doctor to give you a shot if you don't behave." And I ended up being the calmest kid while getting vaccines etc. Even now I'm not even scared of blood
Same. Heck my mom told me the truth about the shots. "Yes, it will hurt a little, but that's alright. A little hurt now is to keep you from catching something later that could hurt you more. Just be braver than my sister and then I'll let you have a soda at lunch."
There's a story about my mom being taken with her sister and some of her sister's classmates to get vaccinated for Polio and my mom (two years younger than the other girls) were freaked out over the little bit of blood.
Then again, my mom also made it a point to desensitize me toward blood at an early age by taking me with her to donate blood and the phlebotomists made it a point to describe the process and let me know the things the blood could be used for. Now I give every three month since I finally have the weight to do so
3:34 I know, right? I remember being confused by my sister not accepting my apologies because of this mindset.
The forced apology things, I always hated, even before I found out that it’s not nice to say your sorry if you don’t mean it. The 2 times I was forced to apologize I made it obvious it was forced. “My mom told me I had to apologize, so sorry about what I did. Are you happy now mom?” And I made sure to exaggerate the “I’m sorry” so it was like “I’m So SoRrY i HuRt YoU” and even used air quotes around the word “sorry.” That was how I convinced my mom not to force me to go on walks I REALLY didn’t want to go on.
I HATED going for walks with my mom, stepdad, and little sister (stepdad’s bio kid, my half sister). I’ve always been out of shape- hard to stay in shape when you grow up at the tail end of the food pyramid bs and having pasta, potatoes, and fried foods shoveled down your throat by your mom, who also would tell the dr “idk why she’s so overweight, we eat health and don’t have any snacks in the house,” completely forget the DISHWASHER WE USED AS A SNACK CUPBOARD AND ALWAYS KEPT STOCKED WITH LITTLE DEBBIES, yeah so hard to understand. So I can’t walk for very long before I need a break. Well, my family would get so upset with me if I stopped walking. We lived on a back road that was lucky enough to see 1 car that wasn’t a resident’s drive through and I knew my road safety very well, so the COULD have gone on a head of me, but the CHOSE to stay with me and complain until I started walking again or just force me to keep walking. I was 10, so I was old enough to be left alone with my DS and the tv for a half hour and not burn the house down. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to walk, I just didn’t want to walk with THEM because they made the experience miserable, and after years of that bs, I now just hate walking in general. Anyway, my stepdad wasn’t home, so I thought5hat since their excuses to not leave me on the side of the road when I got tired was “family bonding,” that meant we wouldn’t have to go. I was wrong. My mom forced me to go. So,I made her promise me that we would got at MY pace and I would lead, no one would be allowed to go ahead of me. She rolled her eyes and said ok. My sister was riding around on her bike and kept going ahead of me. I told my mom “this wasn’t in our deal, I’ll go home if you don’t stop her.” My mom rolled her eyes and told me to shut up and keep walking. So the next time my sister rode ahead of me, I ran up to her bike when she was slowing down and jump kicked the back tire, making her fall. My mom screamed at me to apologize to my sister and that’s when I was like “I’m (air quotes) So SoRrY (air quotes) i HuRt YoU.” Mom was pissed, we went home and I was sent to my room, but she never forced me to go on a walk if my stepdad wasn’t home. And apparently she wasn’t pissed enough to tell him what happened when he came home because I know for a fact if he knew I hurt his precious biological daughter who can do no wrong, I would have been beat. And consider how often she would hit, kick, and spit on me back then (and be allowed to get away with it because Golden Children can do no wrong), I only feel guilty about hurting her when my beef was with my mom, not for hurting her in general.
To have depression is not the same to control your emotions. To control your emotions is when you act less aggressive toward other people. Most people with depression do not hurt other people.
Try, fail.
Try again, fail better.
Repeat until success.
Being a child growing up in the phils minimum requirement is that you learn to play an instrument any instrument but for class needs to be a piano. So piano lessons after class. High school came made me sign up for school band spent all summer learning to play the saxophone
Religion
I personally don't agree with this. I think that decision should be left for the parents
As someone who's not very religious I don't see an issue with teaching religion at a young age at all, as it may teach them about ethics and to develop strong morals. I honestly don't see how their could be any negative impact of teaching religion to children.
@@gabepelletier3602 to me, religion is just a waste of an individual’s life and one doesn’t need religion to learn ethics. The so called good religion has to offer can be demonstrated outside of the religion.
@@idreadFell365 I agree you don’t need religion to teach those things that we both agree are important to the development of a child but I would argue it’s a good catalyst for good development
@@gabepelletier3602 then teach them morals, not religion
To just not have sex. Rather than training how to have safe responsible sex. So fewer hugh mistakes can be made later in life.
1:40 I FOUND MY PEOPLE
Had a neighbor girl that was a bully, she bullied her younger sister, her younger brother, and boys in the neighborhood, thought she could go around punching and hitting boys, and the boys could do nothing. After she was punching me I pushed her so hard she fell over backward she teared up but did not really cry, her father told her that should be a lesson for her to not be a bully because you never know how someone might react
To be honest Id call what her father did good parenting, even if it doesnt sound like it, cause someone could flip out in the worst possible way.
9:28 Exactly. Like... as a kid, I *loved* learning about the human body - it was one of several areas of interest I'd call "my Pokémon". If kids don't even like learning that, they'll *hate* learning taxes, at least until the government makes them simple and easy to file.
11:38
I'd say, collective punishment is acceptable, when it is properly set. But when it's just "it is he who failed, but you all who will suffer" without any ways for team to sort out things with failmate - man, you just made your wards angry without _relatively_ zero consequences for failmate.
On the other hand though, it often creates an environment of self-policing. People pretty quickly resent being punished for someone else's mistake and so they prevent the offender from doing it again.
The whole sharing this is correct. I am sick of it when they teach "sharing is caring." In kindergarten.
"That mistakes should be punished"
This one is true. As the oldest child, I often got punished for things that my youngest brother (10 year difference) doesn't get punished for, because parents grow too, they learn how to parent.
An example is when a few years ago, we were working on the house. My mom was painting and my little brother saw that. Him being a 3/4 year old at the time, wanted to do what his mama did. But obviously they wouldn't let him help in the house. So what did he do? He grabbed a marker and started coloring almost every surface in the toilet. Mom found this and was not happy, obviously, but all she did was explain why he shouldn't do that and then she just cleaned it.
I would've gotten hit *hard* if I did something like that 10+ years ago
6:26 I have a theory that the reason we learn this rule is because when we're first learning to read and write the words with that letter combination often do follow the rule, so it just helps kids remember the order of the vowels while they're still getting the hang of written language
schools need to teach kids they can fail without it ruining their life
When my brothers would fight, dad made them shake hands and kiss each other. They were so grossed out, it always stopped the fight.
16:38 Personally, as a kid, I just assumed the toy ads were for the parents, to give them ideas as to what to buy their kids, so I didn't ask for anything as I just assumed Mum would also see the ad and buy that thing for me eventually.
I've experienced bad teacher moments in elementary school when they don't want to help their own students with whatever confusing assignments. Instead, those teachers automatically took advantage of any "prodigy" students of the class to assist their confused classmates. That never solved anything at the end because the students were assigned to complete their own assignments, not stop at random and tutor either of their confused classmates.
I can advocate that being called good-looking by grandparents etc. as a very plump kid was not helping me at all. And instead just made me put on more pounds with false self confidence for a hot minute. Till I learned I was pretty darn overweight when i got on a scale. No one was around to lie to me then.
18:50 I think they're saying you have a greater than 0 chance if you work hard.
With that said, I am tackling this issue in my comic, so... yeah. That's as much as I can say without spoiling anything, so you'll just have to wait till it's out, sorry.
Oh crap, did I just gratuitously use the word "sorry"? Well, you get what I'm saying.
That love is conditional. Especially from parents.
I feel it's still necessary to forgive people or it just hurts you. What you shouldn't do is forget what they did and become a victim to their relapsing behaviors.
I don't know if I agree with some of these.
The special one.
Special is a spectrum depending on how you view someone they will always surpass you and you may never be able to do what they are doing or at least to the same degree.
The point isn't being a copy but doing what you can do or being satisfied with that.
If you can't then well you might not have a future or a good one.
~
2nd:
Perfect means different things to different people.
~~
3rd:
9:47
Well, 16 year olds don't care about the other stuff you teach them as well. So rather teach them taxes.
Also if you went to high school, why not teach the 18 year olds?
With 18 we had a class called social sciences. We got to learn about our laws and our politicans. It was a waste of time memorizing were blablabla was born and what blablabla is working as right now and what news say about blablabla . So there was the perfect timing to actually teach us about insurances and taxes.
Even if they dont care now they will. Even if they arent paying attention some of it will stick. I wish I was taught how to do my taxes in school, cause even if I dont need to worry about it now (grandfather owns a tax business), I did for a while.
It was mentioned about boys not being able to cry or show weakness and how that follows them into adulthood... what we don't talk about is anger. Anger is a natural human emotion that needs to be felt and experienced like anything else... so why don't we talk about the consequences of pushing all of that down, even though we all instinctively know what the consequences will be? The worst is how this follows you into adulthood. If you are a man, and you get angry, people will FREAK THE FUCK OUT. It is never acceptable for a man to be angry, and there are almost ALWAYS consequences even if you have a legitimate reason to feel a natural human emotion, and even if you didn't threaten anyone, don't take something out on someone else, don't curse, and don't harm anyone. Doesn't matter; you are seen a potential murder, rapist, child molester, etc. You are not a person but a potential threat that needs to be dealt with.
No... I'm not visually expressing anger because I'm going to hurt you, I am experiencing the anger so I DON'T hurt you. If I wanted to hurt you we wouldn't be talking... I would have just done it. So for those of you who are not a man, imagine your ENTIRE LIFE being forced to push all that rage down because you can't show it; not acceptable ESPECIALLY for boys. Now you are a man; there are so many double standards and legitimate grievances to have... but no one takes them serious and no one cares; now people get off on watching others suffer to boot, and they don't care who sees. If you show emotion, you are deemed "weak." If you don't, everyone treats you as if you do not have emotions, even though you are just as much a human being as the person beside you. Eventually something has to give, and then everyone wonders "why" when a teen/man finally snaps.
a weard sugestion but...
teaching both kids and adults that if you consume something or own something it should not be your identifying feature or your personality nor should you judge others by the same principle.
like if you drink energy drink you are into a certain lifestyle, if you listen to certain music, own a certain car, etc. I've seen people change their opinion on others just by these little details, my sister was in a race, and sponsors at the end gave participants energy drinks, latter her friends saw her drinking it and immediately got into a health freak argument about how that is bad and my sister got self-conscious, it was maybe a third time in her entire life that she had one of those, she doesn't even drink coffee.
6:35 Next parents will be making up euphemisms for mitochondria.
1:42 I mean... some people do it just to get a rise, so I'm guessing these people are basing it on that.
I still play a children's card game
14:30 Also... do they not even explain what sex *is* when teaching abstinence only? Because that defeats the purpose of teaching abstinence. It's like saying "no swimming at the beach" and not even explaining what swimming is.
I never strayed too farfrom my interest kept playing video games till I had a stroke also played yugioh the card game
Whatever it is we're teaching instead of critical thinking.
I know a number of otherwise functional adults who are unable to understand that horoscopes, 9/11 conspiracies, crystal resonance therapy, and other things are utterly without merit or credibility.
10:21 Well, if it helps, I'm currently working on a comic about a young girl who actually cares about boys, and she *refuses* to hit them.
I know that this was kinda covered in the vid but please teach kids to show that they like someone by being nice. Even if they aren't mean, being annoying is not good either. I had a boy that would mess with me constantly in grade school and the teacher just brushed it off. Him taking my books from my desk or sitting in my assigned seat when the teacher expected us to be ready to start was so irritating. I just wanted to learn and talk to friends at the time. Plus, me telling him stop did nothing and it did end up in a situation where I smacked his chest because he touched my butt. I felt bad after, but he pushed too far. Thankfully it was a small short spat and no one got in trouble. People might think I'm wrong, and that he should have been in trouble.... But I feel like it was a boundary lesson that he finally learned. If anything I'm particularly mad my teacher didn't step in more other than moving his seat once the seating order changed. He did stop teasing and we were still friends after. ....Taylor, I get it now, but you sucked for that. Hopefully you teach your kids better
1:33 But what about the ones who do it just to get a rise out of you?
Thats very few cases. Most of the time theyre looking for someone who wont stop them.
I dislike the teachers who would punish the class for the actions of one student
1:34 Thats not completely true. Yes, around 90% of the time that is the case but sometimes bullies will stop if you ignore them. I was bullied myself, and that is actually what stopped it.
11:55 Can be a good or bad thing. It shouldnt, but collective punishment is something the military does, so it could get them used to that if they end up joining.
That it's not funny to torment your siblings. I was the oldest and used to torment my siblings. Not bad enough for them to hate me or hold a grudge. But still it wasn't cool and it's not funny
Forcing them to hug/kiss people they barely know. Kids should learn body autonomy
14:36 I plan to tell my kids correct anatomy names in age appropriate was from a young age. And when they reach puberty, they’ll get a full sex talk with videos from RUclips gynecologists to help explain things more. And I’ll be telling them I don’t care if the have sex, just follow certain rules. Proper consent from all parties involved, keep doors closed with a sock or something on the knob so no one walks in on you, I’ll buy you whatever protection you want just use it and use it correctly, you see a doctor about your activities regularly just to stay safe, and don’t be afraid to come to me with any questions or concerns you may have, even if it’s an accidental pregnancy, I’ll help you figure out whatever’s wrong without judgement, just come to me about it. I want my kids to be safe, but I know that putting them in a box will only make them be sneaky and I would rather know my child is sexually active and feels comfortable coming to me than force them to be sneaky and be blindsided when someone accidentally gets pregnant. And I see condoms (both male and female) as medically important as birth control pills, probably even a little more so since bc prevents pregnancy and condoms prevent pregnancy and the spread of certain diseases, so no way in hell am I leaving it up to my child to use their allowance to pay for cheep rubbers or whatever protection they decide to use. I’ll pay for the good quality stuff so that I at least have peace of mind, even if they aren’t mature enough to care about quality. And any daughters I have will likely already be on bc because of my family history of PCOS, so giving them a little extra protection wouldn’t hurt. I see no downsides to having open and comfortable communication with your children about these things. If my kid gets a rash down there, I would rather they tell me and we go to the doctor just to find out it’s poison Ivy or something then for them to keep quiet about the painful bumps that suddenly started appearing after a “fun time” and it turn out to be something serious. That’s how parents lose kids to preventable issues.
i kno im prolly gonna be attacked for asking this but... whats with all these video thumbnails that have something to do with LGBTQ, then you put a title that suggests you are against LGBTQ? are you against LGBTQ?
clickbait to piss people off, just hand them a thumbs down for that $hit
It's to get a reaction so people click on the video. It really does need to stop. The thumbnails should contain contents pertaining to the contents of the actual video.
@@pickledbreadproductions i agree 💯%
That thumbnail is perfect.
Also that if you work hard enough you can do anything. That’s just not true.
14:18 I mean... as a kid, I thought sex was done *only* for reproduction, so I naturally abstained well into my teenage years (and am still a virgin to this day).
also stop teaching little boys not to hit girls. Always defend yourself if someone is trying to harm you!
22:11 Well, I'm glad it's not exclusive to autistic people at least.
This is what they taught you or this is what you understood from what they try to teach you?
That everyone’s a winner and everyone’s creative. These two are the most annoying ones. Like no creativity is so rare it’s not even funny. And no not every body is a winner, you shouldn’t get a trophy for “participating” that just sets a low standard cause no matter how horrible you are you still rewarded
That you can change the sex that you were born.
It's been done already. Keep coping.
@vulpes7079 no it hasn't. I don't need to believe in your delusions.
God i hate those types of people. They are such bad influences on children.
And then those children grow up to be fucked up from the puberty blockers and there is abouslty no way to reverse it.
About 1% or so of trans people regret transitioning and most is from discrimination.
I'm all for being what makes you happy, but I feel like children growing up in this day and age are taught, whether directly or indirectly, that having either a gender or sexuality crisis growing up is what is normal and everyone else is changing their genders and sexualities so they'll be out of place if they don't. I know I didn't word that the best way but I feel where we are societally is genuinely confusing children into feeling like they have to change what/who they are. I don't think children in most cases are capable of making that decision
I think if even if that were the case, this is no reason to deny peoples gender/sexual identity. I’ve seen this argument used so many times to invalidate queer and gender diverse people. I also think that this is because we are (generally) living in a world that is more accepting and people feel more safe to explore gender/sexual identity
@@Bettyhtespaghetti I agree this is a more accepting world and I love that that's the case. I have absolutely nothing against queer or gender diverse people and am even a part of the LGBTQ+ community myself. I simply don't agree with a decision to use gender affirming procedures or medications at such a young age, it's not that I flat out don't agree with it at all. A lot of children that experience gender dysphoria do end up growing out of it (I understand that not all of them do) and I've seen a lot of trans people talking about how even with reversal the effects are never truly gone, that's why I feel that way. I do still feel that when you start growing up in a world with such a large amount of people being a certain way, it's normal that you'd have feelings that align with it until either you grow out of it or you realize that it's who you truly are. I realize how my previous comment comes across, and I definitely could have explained myself a lot better, my bad. If you still don't agree, I apologize, but everyone's opinion is different
That being anything besides straight is wrong. The adult will literally force knowledge on being gay and other stuff in the childs mind and won't let them experience life and figure it out for themselves. For the LGBTQers out there.
I disagree with the "it's okay to not forgive someone" idea. Forgiveness is for your own benefit, not the person who wronged you. We should teach children how to forgive so they don't live with the constant hate and negativity but to stop associating with the people who continue to wrong them... that's just stupid
Liberty and justice for all...
It's on the thumbnail
Gotta stop teaching them history. That shit is old and boring and doesn’t matter.
How does "I'm sorry" not erase a wrong?
actually, you do heal over time, even if you suppress your emotions.
A broken bone will eventually heal, but if you dont set it right, it will heal incorrectly
@@leofink2231 not the same thing. you can heal from emotional trauma, and be completely unchanged from said trauma.
Broski you need to stop with the clickbaity homophobic thumbnails
I don't know but, I don't know if it is satire but the thumbnail and graphics to these reddit things are often homophobic
They need to stop showing videos of adults assaulting employees just because the business is out of whatever item they want. I fear that it's teaching kids that it's okay to be abusive to someone because you aren't getting your way. I understand you're angry that they're out of chicken nuggets but please don't get violent towards other people!
ESPECIALLY because its not the fault of whoever youre assaulting.
that thumbnail....take this thumbs down
First we should not be teaching that you call themselves the children
Blasphemous!
Definitely the LGBT stuff it’s just a bad idea after all it really is
Ok but how?
(Genuinely)
@@egg9486 the people who think they're a different gender when they're not facts don't care about your feelings maybe get a sex change first
@@PlagueVirus2001 nvm I am completely confused with this reply.
At first you say that 🚗✨Facts don’t cars✨🚗 , and then tell trans people to get a sex change
Gender and sexuality, etc ... surely at a young age *-17* . groomer alert
Honestly stop teaching them about slavery. Hear me out as a Latino not going to say racism doesn't exist but imagine learning you were owned by someone whose skin is like your best friend. That was so mind blowing as a kid and immediately makes you look at the world differently.
Those are historical events that happened and you need to learn from to avoid. It shouldn't just disappear from the curriculum because it made you uncomfortably
@@vulpes7079 it's not about being uncomfortable it's about warping minds. Black people are Latinos too they aren't treated in Latin American countries like they are in America.
@@armandogomez2677 what are you even saying now?
@@vulpes7079 stop teaching kids about slavery...
@@armandogomez2677 no, we shouldn't
LGBTQ stuff
L
@@JSowder21 so you suport grooming children ?
How come?