Yeah, why are sensitive people getting the "there's something wrong with you" label? Is there not much wrong with insensitive people? Why don't they get the "there's something wrong with you" label? Although that's what's wrong with the western world, you have to fit into this "normal" region, anything outside of that and you're weird/bonkers/crazy/mental etc
It’s very difficult to be around people who aren’t sensitive. To be around people who don’t let you rest or recharge. To work with people who cut you off after they ask you something and don’t want to listen to what you have to say because it takes more than a second to answer their question. To constantly be told not to react to things just because it doesn’t bother others. Sick of it…
Yes, that's all very true. Especially that part when people don't respect our condition or try to be a bit more understanding of our needs. It's not just being sensitive to sounds, etc its the fact that I feel like the sound is attacking me making me feel drained or that I need to escape from it. We literally do feel everything so intensely unfortunately the world just doesn't understand. I think we need to start owning it and letting people know that they need to respect our needs a bit more. 😢
I am an HSP and I've never had anxiety or depression. I'm not weak and miserable. It's just that my world is overstimulating and it makes me mad, irritated and burnt out so I break down and cry but it's to release it all. When you look at nature, there's nothing in it that's an offense to the senses. This modern world is unnatural to human beings. All the noise, artificial smells and artificial lights, too much!
Capitalism, modernity, productivity, and efficiency - all of these make the environment overwhelming. We are taught at an early age that we need to always be productive, and that we need to serve, create or produce (related to labor, wealth and finances) to be recognized as a member of the society. Most of the time people who work for money, are forced to be productive and efficient because they need to earn money to survive
"When you look at nature, there's nothing in it that's an offense to the senses." Yeah no, that's ridiculous. There are absolutely things in nature that are an offense to the senses. Ever had the sun in your eyes? Stood close to a loud waterfall? Been stuck out in the rain, cold and wet? Been bitten by a mosquito? Encountered a dead animal that is rotting? Stepped in feces? Been sprayed by a skunk? This is all nature. Nature isn't some place where all the animals get along and everything is good and happy and perfect, only tarnished by humans. Nature is brutal, which is part of its beauty. It isn't good to create an idealized version of nature that strips out that part of it
As an hsp I find I’m very attuned to other people’s energy. For me it is the most exhausting and difficult aspect to deal with. I’m drawn to calm and peaceful people with predictable behaviours and I avoid loud, erratic, angry or negative folks. I have a tendency to shed friends, often because I’ve been hurt by them. It’s really unfortunate but I just can’t seem to toughen up. Do I dislike being an hsp? I’d have to say yes. Even though there are some positive aspects to it, having to constantly fend off all the daily assaults on my nervous system just sucks the joy out of life.
I have a tendency to shed friends too (and family) for the same reason. I'm a guy. If one is sensitive and a guy, one gets in trouble even more in a way.
absolutely, am too sensitive which some people have known, and it makes me so uncomfortable because they start looking at me as if I have a clue already @@alixnorman7389
Exactly.. As a HSP myself, I used to feel just abnormal. But then over the years I just surrounded myself with a bunch of people like me and now we just sit there and contemplate our existence together, while indulging in sensory stimuli at the same time😅. I don't want no division between us and others, every person's character is so nuanced. But honestly, the way people who are less sensitive perceive things just seems to lack color a bit lol. Why wouldn't you be slightly overwhelmed by the profoundness of ur own birth?
Iam a older INFJ HSP... yrs ago I found Elaine's book and it all clicked. I always felt like I never fit in, I've been told I have too much empathy etc... I had trauma growing up and that with my sensitivity was overwhelming at times. Through my faith in Christ I have learned to be less anxious and have healed from many wounds. Today I embrace my sensitivity and know I am wonderfully created by a God who loves me. I cry easily, laugh and really care about animals and people. when it all becomes too much I send it up. love yourself, love others...❤
Holy moly sounds exactly like me! 🩷 I don’t know you but I love you! I’m also an Infj-t HSP who also has childhood trauma, loves Jesus, & has always been told those things as well.. I’m young and it’s been a rough ride, but hearing about your healing is very inspiring ❤ God bless you
I call it a blessing and a curse. I also wouldn't trade being sensitive for anything. When I was a child I was called tender hearted. I was also told that I'm a crybaby and to stop being so sensitive. I was a very anxious young child. Puberty seemed to buffer things a tiny bit. During menopause and after, my sensitivity is back at childhood level. Only now, as an adult, I know the real horrors of the world. It's been incredibly overwhelming at times, especially these days. Thank you for sharing this, it helps. I wish we made up at least half of the population, maybe the world would be a better place.
Same I was always called a cry baby and I overly sensitive etc It's intensified since Menopause!!!! I cry at the drop of a hat ... and My anxiety is really bad too
@@HeavenlyPresley-Tonya I have ADHD, and menopause causes it to intensify. I didn't get diagnosed till 59. I also sincerely believe I'm on the Autism Spectrum. It's a tough time for sensitive people. Make sure you're doing things that give you joy. Try to give yourself a break from the news. I finally learned that if I can't change it or fix it, then worrying about it doesn't help. It only hurts us. Our tears, I believe, is because our body is overwhelmed by the emotion so, we cry. I'm grateful, everyday, that I'm a sensitive person. In what seems like a world filled with hateful people, be proud of your kindness, caring and tears.❤️
@@susanhunter9196 Thanks for the message Yes very true it can be overwhelming at times - but We show the world how you can be Loving Kind Caring - Nice to people Polite etc -- I cry in public and do not care who sees me anymore I am older now LOLLL but I have Bipolar 2 Which is horrid and CPTSD from Trauma Abuse SA DV and Abandoned as a child by parents etc Trauma has been my middle name BUT I stick it out all the emotions nightmares etc -- It's H*LL but I don't let it end my life -- I Love being sensitive My Grown boys don't too many hugss etc loll and I Love you's and kisses on their cheeks and on and on hahaha
This is so inspiring. My mind has been consumed with thoughts of him. It's been 6zmonths since he left, and the pain feels like a physical ache. The laughter, the memories, the adventures they're all gone. I've tried to distract myself, but the harder I try, the more I think about him. How do people truly move on? The memories are still so vivid, and I miss him more than words can express.
Letting go of someone you love is incredibly hard. I went through a similar experience when my twelve-year relationship ended. I couldn't bear to lose him, so I did everything I could to rekindle our relationship. Eventually, I sought the help of a spiritual counselor, who guided us back together.
being extroverted and highly sensitive often shows up as extreme people pleasing and surrendering our own boundaries. recognizing this has been the first step to me finding my peace and realizing that it is ok to be sensitive and ask other people to respect my needs
It’s just so scary when people always leave you for it. At first they love exactly that about you. But then there comes the day they think it’s annoying.
Most of the time people don't even love themselves or struggle to accept their own selves, so don't worry about those people that you wrote about, cause they don't even care about themselves and so they treat others with the same inconsistency.
@@sabrinamystified i absolutely agree. I made the same experiences. They try to figure out what is good for them, it might take them time. Has nothing to do with me
My husband is always like, “can’t you just take a pill so you stop worrying?” Aka so he doesn’t get inconvenienced by my anxiety. But everyone loves how I keep the household running smoothly, always pack everything we might need, meals planned, cooked, and cleaned up after.
Thank you for this!! I’ve certainly been told I’m “too sensitive.” Finally I realized that is just a common excuse for cruel and abusive behavior. Now in my 40s, I’m completely fed up with insensitive, unempathetic bullies. I want to surround myself exclusively with kind, caring people. And yes, being an HSP is a gift, not only to the world but also to ourselves. I think we experience life on a much deeper level than other people. We’re capable of extreme despair but also profound joy, clarity, wisdom and compassion.
Honestly this world is rough and how could we not be emotional and anxious. I wake up everyday feeling deeply sad for the world. Some loved ones tell me facts like we have medical advancements that allow us to live longer, we are generally less violent, and tell me that not all is lost. It's difficult for me to see grey. This may be a big component to highly sensitive people. I often feel like a burden and how could I possibly be loved so I hide a lot of my feelings and become quite. I find that if I suffer aloud I make others suffer too. I think life is hard and some can handle it better. I unfortunately have to really work at it everyday to stay balanced. Thank you for your video. I hope to give myself some grace today.
I feel seen by this comment. I’m sending you grace and love through this message board. You are right. The world is deeply sad. And-I believe the world is deeply wondrous and beautiful too. My own sensitivity seems to make me experience life more intensely, with higher highs and lower lows. I have the capacity to feel the world’s deep sadness. But I’ve discovered that I also hold the capacity to experience-vividly and deeply-the world’s joy and wonder. I’m continually learning how to keep myself grounded in that balance. And to not discount my deep experience of the world just because some people don’t understand it. The balance of life is there my friend, whether we feel it or not. I hope your journey gets easier. You are more deserving of love than you know
My dad was a combat vet and was often frustrated with me, if not downright pissed off. He taunted me for being a “momma’s boy,” but she, in addition to locking me outside as a 3 year old to get me out of her hair, once forced me back outside in the snow, bleeding, because a bully much older than me (I was a 1st or second grader) had attacked me. She told me to fight my own battles. I’m rambling, but even as an adult at church, I said something to the pastor. Later, I thought about what I said and thought it might have sounded insensitive. I tried later to clarify what I meant, and it pissed him off. He semi-yelled, “You need to stop being so sensitive!” Apparently other men in the church had been complaining about me being too sensitive. It took a while, but I finally took a long look at them and realized I was ok, and they were insensitive a holes.
You aren't the problem, you're the solution. You're caught at the intersection of patriarchal values that have been needing recessed by men because it's hurting men, but they have a hard time with having that conversation. You're also probably hitting their shadow, and when you first start to see it, you'll have a hard time with the person you are seeing your shadow in. Then you see yourself in it, and realize (hopefully) that it's something you need to do some emotional work on.
There are plenty of assholes at church. Sometimes, the most "religious" of people are the people who will need the most forgiveness all the rest of the week. 🤔
It breaks my heart that this is the societal norm - boys are taught from very early on that they need to be a big boy, a tough little man, a strong man, not a pansy (or insert other derogatory shaming term here), etc. This is perpetuated basically from birth onwards, at home and with peers. My personal belief is that what makes a man strong is being open to what they're feeling and not afraid to feel it, express it as appropriate (sometimes it benefits everyone to hold on to things for a bit of time to keep going, like in an ER trauma - I know from experience that staying in the focused, results-driven state until it's over, but then we find a time and place some time later to break down and feel it), and working through it. Sending supportive energy your way. 🧡
I'm sorry for What you've Gone Through.. Being Tough or strong is a Mentality.. It never means that you should Suppress your emotions... Lets embrace the gift of Sensitivity 🎉
Im so sorry to hear this. I have a boy that is HSP, he have all the traits. I want him to know that God created him this way for great purpose. That he doesnt have to be ashame.
@@resplandece2corintios464 that is awesome. Don't worry. My parents were old school and didn't express emotions well. I'm sure your family will be great!
Sensitive people gave us Winnie the Pooh and Paddington Bear. Imagine a Pooh-less childhood. That chubby little cubby all stuffed with puff enriched us all.
"Sensitive has been a bad word". I was also told that I took things "WAY too seriously" or "can't take a joke", or "too sensitive". But then again, those folks turned out to be toxic. Well, that explain why Ilse Sand's book is titled "Highly Sensitive People in an Insensitive World". Ilse Sand, a Danish therapist/psychologist, wrote her book based off of Elaine Aron’s book, and Ilse has also a test in her book as well for HSPs.
Agreed. The way I look at it is why would he go out of your way to give harmful or humiliating jokes. I can take a joke that doesn't involve me being the butt of the joke
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without him, I love him so much. wish I can get him back I can do anything to have him back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is Shelly Renee White
I remember moments when I was a child trying to hide my tears and hide the fact that I was highly sensitive. I tend to get teary easily, feeling the pain/hardships of others, even in moments when I only hear about the situation or hear about someone's pain, not actually seeing it with my own eyes. And I've always felt ashamed of tearing up. As an adult, I've read The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N Aron, and I've done the corresponding workbook, which has helped me to accept that I'm highly sensitive. It's still something I struggle with, and I feel like social anxiety is related to the fact that I am highly sensitive and don't want to appear so to others. Harder since I am naturally shy and quiet. But, I know that being highly sensitive makes me more empathetic, gentle, and supportive.
If I'm honest, I now think that when I'm on an anti-depressant (winter months), it's much easier being me. I get to have the good parts w/o the crushing emotions.
Sounds like you are Autistic. Look up Autistic masking in females. I believe high sensitivity and Autism overlap a lot if its not the same thing all together.
Oh my goodness! Thank you for acknowledging all the novels aimed at grade school children that include not only death, but fairly detailed descriptions of death. As a kid I was traumatized!
They do teach very cruel things at school. I'm german and we had to learn all about World War 2, with details about the concentration camps etc., horrible history, it was incredibly hard to deal with this for me at such a young age. The incentive was to prevent anything like that from ever being able to happen again by telling kids the truth. Which is a good intention, but those things were definitely traumatizing for me as well. I can't even watch any movie about war now, it's all way too dark for me and gets me down so much. As an adult, at least we can protect ourselves somewhat from dark, cruel and violent input, by selecting what we watch. I also wished they wouldn't force school kids having to read/ watch certain things. I feel a lot of the suggestions for literature etc. aren't made by very sensitive people.
Same here! I hated when the teacher read us sad animal stories, like Black Beauty and The Yearling. I don’t care if they are classics, I would sit there and try not to cry!! I hated them!
Crying about those books is fine. I still think about how awful some of the situations were, but thats life. These things happen. I never hated the teachers or school for showing that, I think it was a good preparation. Teenagers need to learn how to process those sad stories for when they inevitably happen to them or people they know.
Thanks, Emma. I've known I'm highly sensitive for a long time, but I didn't realize just how much shame I've continued to carry around because of it, and how often I repress my natural responses in an effort to be that more culturally idealized citizen.
You described me in so many ways! I've been told all my life that I'm too sensitive and caring... BUT my husband sees it as a beautiful thing. It's one of the things that attracted him to me. ALSO The closer I got to Jesus, He showed me who I'm in Him. I started to realize what would the world be without my type. Of course God knew me before He knitted me in my mother's wound (Psalm 139:13-16). My sensitivity GIFT has help so many people in my designing business working with grieving families. They always tell me that I've help them through this process or I'm calming and are taken by surprise at first that it's not just about exchanging monies for a product...it's about glorifying the LORD for a higher purpose leading to HIM.
This is so true! I’m too sensitive, the bad part is I care about some people and when they don’t seem to care about me it hurts.I’ve gotten angry in the past,now that I’m older I try to let go.if I do something for someone I try not to expect a response, or anything in return.but it’s hard sometimes,hoping somebody cares about me.(wah) I’m learning to be my own best friend.
in time, you will find there will be a few select people who are your people.. I have only 2 non-related.. they are my people.. The others do and expect nothing in return--however magically you may run into another HSP.. out of many people I did--they are my two bestest friends ever..
I'm with you Emma on being an HSP. I'm an introverted HSP. Yes, I have been often told that I am too sensitive. I have definitely got tougher, but I don't want to lose the caring sensitive side of me. It is a bit hard when you are constantly put down for being sensitive. And I'm afraid that is by someone who either lacks empathy or has very little of it. I will keep calm and carry on. :)
OMG thank you for this. I really feel validated by this video. I am truly, squarely, smack-dab in the camp of HSP. I'm sensitive to light, sound, and emotions of others. It seems my life motto is actually of two memes...1. Hold on, let me over-think this" and 2. I'll get over it, I just need to be dramatic first" with a pinch of crazy cat lady 😺🦄
I get overwhelmed very easily by strong emotions and have an intense household that never let's up on loud sounds. Also super sensitive with smell so I ALWAYS have some aromatherapy on because I can just smell the dirt and negativity of the day. (Maybe because of asd but whatever). I totally resonate with this ♡ thank you so much! More people need to understand the part with taking breaks. Sometimes I just need my quiet time to recharge :( ❤
This actually made me cry, even if I’m still a bit ashamed to admit it. It’s not always easy, but I have always loved my sensitivity because it allows me to see life and the world with more beauty. Your videos have helped me a lot, thank you 🙏🏼
I agree with you! I have often been told that I am “too sensitive “ but I often feel sorry for those who “aren’t sensitive enough”. They are missing out on all those things we perceive that they cannot.
Thank you for this video. I’m highly sensitive and I hated this part of myself for so long. I care so much about everything. I had never heard that it could be a positive thing.
It is a constant internal tug of war. As a man, it is very difficult! I find social interaction with people even family members at times exhausting. Too much external stimulation leads to feelings of being overwhelmed, depression, and anxiety. To cope, I stay home to isolate myself from overexposure. I limit my time on the internet and especially social media platforms to avoid sensory overload and feelings of hopelessness.
I'm an HSP. I'm 45 now, and learned to except this about myself. Still though, I'm stunned by the strength of it and other people's failure to understand. Ex. This morning I was I'm the car running an errand with my husband. A song came on the radio and I quickly asked if he minded if I changed the channel. See, it's as though I can so feel the singer's pain as he signs, it's usually cause to make me feel down for hours. My husband said "Huh..I've heard song 3 or 4 times now and couldn't even tell you what it's about." Thank you so much for everything you do! Much love, health, and happiness over the holidays and into the new year! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for this relatable and timely video! I've learned about and embraced the fact that I'm likely an HSP, and would love to see more content on how to thrive in an extroverted, noisy, busy world that leaves me feeling consistently overwhelmed.
I struggle with this in friendships. I seem to think and care so much more about my friends than they do about me. I’m not sure if they are showing the “normal” amount, and I’m just overly sensitive, or that they don’t care about me as much as I do about them.
@@ilovepickle I agree totally with you. Yet I truly feel that the "H" part of acronym ve removed as its just speaking that into our being~ saying the word highly. We need to speak into ourselves confident words😇
Holy s***. I finally know what this is. I've been stressed out the last few months and right now almost all sounds are just too much. I can't even really listen to my favorite music anymore. And now that I watched this video it all clicked. Feeling very intense emotions, reading the room instantly... Deep down I always suspected that I'm highly sensitive but bc of the stigma I didn't want to admit it to myself.
💯 Spot on! I was diagnosed with Autonomic Nervous System Dysfunction at John’s Hopkins. The doctor said to me I was born with a lion in the room. That my hyper sensitivity was like a superpower and at a genius level. It explained a lot about myself. But being so different was not positively accepted. I always knew I was sensitive to everything around me. I could pick up how someone was feeling by their facial expression. I could feel subtle nuances about things that were going on in society before it was “a thing”. Problem solving was an obsession. But I felt like a lost soul. An outcast. Particularly in my family. Perceived as weak, over emotional, over dramatic etc. It’s been a curse tbh. Just wish that I had this knowledge many years ago. Great video! ☮️
Thank you. Wish this was around when my parents encouraged my siblings to help "toughen me up". There was no safe place, being bullied at school too. I longed to be invisable. Ended up hanging out at the park a lot
My husband divorced me because of me having HSP trait after 4 years of being married. He said it’s too much for him to handle my sensitivities to smells, noises and vibrations, also having allergies. It broke my heart, but now I know that my divorce was the blessing in disguise. He was not the right person for me and now I have a therapist who is also HSP who inspires me to use my very sharp sense of intuition as HSP to “select” people who feel right. It’s incredible how my life became easier since I started to operate relying on my super power, my intuition. I became as an X-ray scanner, I just “smell” trouble from far away. Our sensitivities are our superpowers ❤🎉
When It Gets Interesting Is When You're HIGHLY Sensitive & An EXTROVERT! I Think It Confuses People How I Can Be So Outgoing & Really Like Interaction With People & Yet Still Get "Touchy" About What I Experience Through My Five Senses, Or My Reactions To Things Like Conflict Or Violent Material Or Sensory Input That Bombards Us - ALL Around Us All The Time....They Are Actually Part Of The Same Life Experience For Me & I Feel Them All Deeply! I Am A Sensitive, Deeply Feeling, Intuitive, Creative & Empathic Person On This Planet & I Will No Longer Apologize For It! Being Criticized For Being Just How I Am Has Caused Me Enough Self Esteem For Too Long - Now I Occasionally Hear My Sensitivity Being Pointed Out But In A Positive Way! And Now If Not By Someone Else - I'll Do It!😁
I went through many years yearning to be different, constantly working on myself, always trying to figure out what my significant other wanted, so I could become that… never feeling good enough or able to be loved for who I actually am!
I’ve just discovered I am an HSP, it gives me so much happiness knowing that I am like this, being able to learn more and look into it more will definitely help me to navigate the world in a different way, a better way hopefully.
🥰 isn’t it incredible when you first find out? Especially once I did the exercise of looking at my past through the lens of being an HSP, I had some incredible aha moments!
I'm an hsp..I can remember sobbing b/c the cows in the field were getting wet b/c it was raining...my mother would try to console me to no avail...she'd tell me the cows liked the rain, it made them feel good but I wasn't buying it..She realized I needed balance...we all do.,,,some of us have to tough enough to do the hard things...you might think the world would be a better place if everyone was an hsp but it wouldn't.......I've never thought of myself as flawed...I realized we are all different and it's a good thing b/c it provides the balance we need to have a functioning society. Don't beat yourself up for being an hsp, but also don't beat up others who are not..and be receptive to constructive criticism b/c we hsp's can easily have blind spots. We need tender hearts but we also need tough hides. And don't beat up people who aren't sensitive people..that would be insensitive..they have their reasons for being the way they are. We can learn from each other and find the balance we all need.
I’m 25 years old and I spent my whole life thinking something was wrong with me, or that I was cursed because I’m a highly sensitive person and didn’t know it. Didn’t know anyone else in my 25 years who was or is like this. I literally cried watching this video it made me happy and sad knowing I’m not alone and HSP is a real thing. Thank you !! 😊
WOW! Less than a minute in and you had me. EVERYONE that is close to me has told me nearly all my life that I'm TOO SENSITIVE. I did discover that I was HSP about 15 or more years ago, and I never hated it, I just have a hard time regulating emotions, especially when they are sadness, despair, grief, loss. I mean anyone would, but I get fixated. I am in therapy right now, so that helps. HSP is not a curse, it's my superpower, but I need to control my powers not let them control me.
Thank you, I needed to hear this to realize that the internal battle is real, I am practicing self acceptance so I see still battle my sensitivity. I’m realizing that while growing up my sensitive nature was what made me different from others. I deeply feel, including the deep heartedness,shame, weakness, and judgements from others -because it was my loved ones saying them, those comments turned into my internal dialogue- criticisms like “you are so nosy, you are too sensitive, you take things personal, and your so naive”. To me the idea of writing a letter to my sensitivity brought me to tears; clearly there is some healing and acceptance being done here and I’m so grateful. This is the essence of my higher self and I need this part of me to be present, to love fully, and get along in life with minimal anxiety and ruminations. Be well with love light.
OH MY GOSH!! I have needed this my whole lifetime 😂 it explains why I couldn’t do my job anymore! Thank you so so much! I’ve gone to therapy blah blah blah and you have guided me to get more information! Thank you!
Thank you so much I was mid crying well watching this just about hitting a dart into a wall accidentally and when I saw this I realised that me beings sensitive is not bad my mom always told me this but this really helped more then anything
Absolutely 100% an asset!! I wouldn’t give up my high sensitivity even if I could! We feel so deeply and therefore get to see and feel and experience beauty, love, bliss, passion… with an intensity that others will never know!
I’ve known that I was a highly sensitive person since I was a toddler, I just didn’t know it had a name. Thank you for helping me feel like I have a superpower.
I am always so fascinated by individuals who know so early on! Did you go through any stretches of time feeling weak or different or out of place or too vulnerable or broken? Gosh I had to go through a lot of that!!
male HSP here. Thank you for your video about HSPs to shed more light on the subject. I want so bad for society to one day understand the richness and value of HSPs instead of running us over with aggression and loudness. My question is, How do I NOT internalize that shame of others who have told me I "lack confidence" or I need to "be less sensitive" as if there's something wrong with me.
By asserting that there is *strength* in being emotionally vulnerable, emotionally available. By normalizing that sensitivity quality in a matter-of-fact way, and reinforcing it toward other people, they begin to respect you more & more, AND, then they are influenced by you, and you'll begin celebrating this quality in you. My husband is HSP and staunchly so. I wouldn't want him any other way because he is himself. He should be allowed to be himself. As should you. I wish you well. Keep be authentically you.
Maybe start with asking yourself what you get for shame and if you find it to be nothing of value, you can choose to stop identifying with it. Of course that's a process but at least you've got a direction and choice. That's agency which fosters generative drive and you're halfway there.
I'm a male HSP too. I've wasted too much time on the pipe dream that one day society would understand our richness and value. Society understands your value if you present it in the right currency. A healthy society is not going to be disposed to listen to a "feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy" (to quote George Bernard Shaw). High sensitivity is not an excuse to skip out on hard work. We have the responsibility to do something with our sensitivity, make something that adds demonstrable richness and value. That includes being more deliberate in how we present ourselves. The dream of being able to go through the world always being authentic is a childish conceit that everyone has to outgrow to be useful in society. Maybe it's harder for us? Too bad.
While I can’t imagine how it must be as a male HSP, I certainly understand shame, and even as a female HSP feeling weak/ less then/ broken accompanied me much of my life. It helps me (in regards to others) to ask the question: who are they to judge me/ to decide whether I’m broken or not or whether I lack confidence. Who are they to make that judgment? If they looked at me from a place of unconditional love, they wouldn’t see lack, they would see my beautiful, gentle, caring, loving soul!
It's good to have feelings with you guys, it means that you don't have depression, as depression is the absence of emotions, and remember that feelings can always be dealt with
This video let me thinking deeply. I'm an introvert and I've always feel inadequate, weird & different in a negative way. I recently discovered my feelings developed at a very young age because my parents said to everyone around me that i was shy they even said like I was not even there. I used to observe people very carefully and enjoy listening to adult conversations. I'm 38 years old now I've lost count on how many time I've had to mask my personality to fit into social settings. The moment I start acting like my real self I always notice strange looks at me, I still don't know why I've always taught is my personality. I don't believe I'm an HSP however I am hyper sensitive to stimuli. This world needs more diversity and acceptance.
I definitely agree! The world needs more diversity and acceptance and I hear you on social settings. I’ve always felt out of place and the need to play a certain role. Have you taken the HSP test on Dr Elaine Aron’s website? That helped me to figure out that I definitely am an HSP!
I was born deaf and when i was 13 i was diagnosed with diabetes. Since then i was in and out of the behavioral hospital and put on medications and never helped, only made things worse. I'm 27 now, with a 5 year old son and a wife. I have just learned about HSP and believe this is something i have been dealing with all my life. The only way i could show my emotions was to lash out. These past few days i have taken time for myself to recharge my brain. Im currently dealing with a divorce and its even harder when my mind is running away. Thank you!
Very accurate. I've been told since I was a little girl that I wear my heart on my sleeve. But it's who I am. My teens and 20s were hard because of that. I'm grateful to have found my place in the world. What I wish most is not that I cared less, but that people cared more. I'm a sensitve extrovert. That means I find myself in the thick of very emotional situations often. I'm not afraid to cry in public or to be vulnerable. I don't shy away from running to comfort those in pain, even if I don't know them well. I think it makes me a better friend, volunteer minister, wife and mother. Caring sometimes hurts, but I'm ok with that because I know I can survive and heal and help others heal too. The key for me is knowing when to take a break. If my self care is not right I can't function well. I'm still learning balance here. Thank you for this well put video. And thank you for the new perspective. It will help me to make peace with my anxiety, I can't change it. I just need to care for it
Emma im beyond thankful that I found your RUclips videos you made me feel so much better about myself especially with this video and you've helped me so much when I couldnt afford to see my therapist thank you Emma ❤❤❤
I love this so much! And one thing I'd like to mention is that as a HSP there are people who will like to imply or outright say there's something "wrong" with you. These are individuals who are uninterested in the minds and view of other people, oftentimes narcissists. Growing up as a HSP my stepmother would deliberately antagonize me by literally implying I was being antagonistic or seeking attention for simply wanting a quiet break (preferably without anyone even noticing). As an adult I can see that those would be motives *she* would have with her behavior, but not motives I've ever had. Her screaming and yelling at me over her own inability to understand anyone but herself really did make me think there was something "wrong" with me and sent me on a very unhelpful path for many years. I think that many people who "self-diagnose" themselves with ADHD or Autism are actually highly sensitive people, and/or introverts who feel misunderstood by the world. My advice is to proudly own your identify as a HSP, and not let the world make you feel pathologized for it.
Oh man you had to go through a lot! I also had quite a lot of trouble with my stepmom. I think she’s also an HSP which makes it easier for me to understand why she could never handle being around me. I was just too much/ too intense and she had no idea how to set boundaries or protect her own energy.
Emma, each and every episode of the series is a precious gift. Thank you! I'm trying to enjoy them one by one and not to binge watch them, I am listening some again, I am rewinding parts Finally something clicks with my scientifically oriented yet sensitive brain! And presented in such a down to earth, peaceful manner. Thank YOU ❤
I’m actually glad that I was told by my therapist that I was a HSP. It gave me a sense of relief and understanding about why my behaviors were the way they are even when I was a kid. Though it took a bit of explaining to my parents that this was the reason for my struggles with emotional reactivity because it’s easy to attribute that to my brain injury, autism, and ADHD diagnoses. Part of me kind of wishes that I could have been told that I was an HSP when I was much younger because it would’ve saved me a lot of strife and stress of being told so much and many times that I over react or that my emotions come off as too strong for the given situations that I find myself in. I have been fortunate that people didn’t get angry at me for being the way I was, mostly because of the fact that I was born with cerebral palsy and having to be in an already very inaccessible and not so inclusive world was already a very clear reason for why I had struggled with my emotions and stuff like that. It doesn’t help that I am also an introvert on top of it. Introverts more often tend to be HSPs.
I teared up many times watching this. I’m highly intuitive, and I see that as a gift now that I’m 49 years old. But the sensitive stuff has always bothered me. I wish I knew I was HSP long ago especially with the smells and sounds. I get emotional when I see an old couple holding Hands tightly. Or beautiful small things like a tree changing colors.🥺 and it’s been hard so I stay alone a lot. Sucks
I have never felt so heard and validated until watching this video. Thank you for helping me understand myself even more. I struggle with this so much.
I hadn't realized HSP was genetic, 'born with it'. I've been told its a trauma response. I don't necessarily feel shame, but it is exhausting to feel on alert, affected by noise, smell, flickering lights. Im aware of being self compassionate, listening to what my body needs. Sometimes i just want better integration so I have the energy to use my creativity.
Yes! I spent a long time wondering what must have caused the trauma that I supposed was at the root of some of my traits. It's been relieving to discover that it's probably just innate sensitivity -- no pathology.
I was wondering if HSP is genetic. The noisy nephew who now stays more at mum's house, he won't eat certain foods due the smell or messes about in school yet still manages to listen to what teachers says.
@@LoneOrcaI wondered all the same things, only recently hearing of HSP& realizing that I am one. I think I've just been more sensative to the bad things that happened in my life, like HSPs are more prone to be traumatized. It also makes you a target to bullies & a scapegoat in the family dynamic. It's good to finally realize there's nothing wrong with me, I'm just different.
Since a child I have been overly sensitive -- BUT My Trauma's have intensified it and being I am older / menopause -- My Parents were NOT sensitive at all just the opposite my siblings either none of my family --- that I can remember grandparents etc Maybe one of My grandmothers -- but I don't think its Genetic from research I've done extensively -- so I disagree with that -- but that's my opinion
WOW!! I stumbled upon this video this morning… And of course the title captured my attention because as a child, I was labeled, “too sensitive” - A description that seemed to stay attached to me for many years… In the past 20 years, through my relationship with God, I have learned many things about the gift of sensitivity… And embracing it… Which I’m happy to say I now live in that reality… but you are the first person I have heard speak about sensitivity as a ‘gift’ and I loved everything about what you said and even heard a few things that made me think deeper on the subject. Thank YOU for sharing your insights and I look forward to more of them as I have now subscribed to your channel. Im a writer and this inspired me to pick up once again a piece I began writing a few years ago. God bless and Merry Christmas!!!
This video explained a lot why I suffered so many nightmares as a child, seeing things, sleep walking, and add on some childhood abuse. I have always been very sensitive and feel things deeply. Thank you for this video Emmavut brought a lot of clarity to me!❤
50% of highly sensitive people are introverts, and 50% are extroverts. It's 50/50 between men and women. We make up about 20 to 26% of the population. And I've devoted my life to helping people see their sensitivity as a superpower. It is easy to let go of negative emotions, anxiety, and trauma and feel their healthy self-concept safely, rapidly, and holistically. My only regret is that I didn't learn about all the powerful tools that allow us access to the excellent resources within us! We were the ones who helped people survive by seeing or sensing things that they didn't. We were also the caretakers, the philosophers, healers, and so much more!
Oh my God, As you were explaining, it was like you are talking about my life and experiences!!! Thank you for reminding me the advantages of being a HSP, although I have to work a lot on it, but most of all, it is such a gooooood feeling that I am not alone in this big world! 🙏🏻💐🥰
Thank you! You are amazing! I have read Elaine’s book and another book but you have put everything so eloquently in a short time. I love to know that there are some people that understand what it’s like to be me! Love your work generally and thank you from the bottom of my heart!
The HSP must allow for this. I often need space, time, quiet etc. well over the allotted amounts. Dreaming doesn't happen all at once. I am amazed, though, at others who can clean their kitchens in a half-hour, while mine never seems to get done. These are wonderful people, too.
The hardest part for me is work. Dealing with deadlines, overbearing bosses… Public speaking. It’s all too much. I took an easier job and then wound up getting promoted! A promotion I didn’t even want. Now the job stress has become too much and I’m looking for an easier job.
59, and have never been ashamed of being a HSP. But growing up in a narcissistic family, my gifts were devalued and I was taken advantage of, priming me for a lifetime of narc abuse. Im learning to take back what Ive lost and hold on tightly to my gifts as I evolve and grow each day. Thanks for your youthful wisdom
Yes! Yes! Yes!!! You are describing my feelings right now!! Having struggles with my adult children. I am back living in an environment that brings on this not-so-good feelings!! I love hearing your talks!! I pray that God WILL CHANGE ME!!
I reckon that there's an increased correlation of empathy in people who have actually had something rough happen to them in youth. Whereas people who didn't have this happen or got positively pampered can't so much feel the pain indicators in others. They can't or won't really believe such bad stuff happens and can be so impactful. Their standard reaction to bad things heard is a driven anger and that's about the most of it. Because that's monetarily advantageous to set off at will in media. But they don't see the further nuance. It's a blessing and a curse on each side and whatever way you look at it.
Great content Emma! Thank you 😘 Could you please bring this topic more often? It's really important to bring awareness to this matter. Whether you are a HPS or not God bless you for sharing your knowledge with us ❤
I live in Olympia Washington, and some of the most insensitive, judgemental, snobby, distant, conceited, uncaring, self-centered, unfriendly and "lacking any kind of compassion" people I have EVER met are members of the Presbyterian church that I am attending less and less. I have never seen a bigger bunch of snobs !!!!! Sad.
@@oddlibrarianout1295 Thank you so much. I hope you find a new church with nicer people in it soon. I totally quit going to mine, and am happier for it. Yes, toxic people are in church, too. Good luck, and take care. ❤
Thank you for this! I loved that you shared in perfect timing! I appreciate the sensitivity to which you deliver this. The tone and energy was soothing and nurturing. The way you also delivered in such a way that made me feel seen and appreciated. Felt like my inner child needed to hear this. ❤
I have seen my sensitivity as a flaw because my mother has taught that you can't show your weakness by crying or being hurt by things others say or complaining. Now I have re-learned that it's better for me to let out my feelings (sometimes alone) than to smother and go on without acknoledging what I feel. If I do that those feelings at some point burst out of me unwanted. I might shout and show anger or act passive-aggressively. With my only child I have seen that my sensitivity helps me read my daughters needs and emotions. She is under 2 years old so she doesn't speak very fluently yet. Pardon my English. I was quite amotional as I wrote this.
Get ready! My son is almost 6 and he is an incredible being who challenges me more than anything else in my life! 😁 I think he is highly sensitive and he’s definitely an extrovert, super social, loves people, loves to mingle, which can be quite a challenge for my introverted HSP nature. And to feel the depth and intensity of his emotions is incredible and yet at times completely overwhelming and even heart breaking! He has taught me a lot about boundaries!! 🤗 Good luck, momma! Parenthood is beautiful!
You are an angel. Thank you so much for your videos. I have always been highly sensitive and for that reason suffer of many forms of panic and anxiety disorders. Your approach is the only one I have encountered that makes a lot of sense out of something that is both hard to describe and understand. Thank you so much for making it accessible!
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There are too many insensitive, uncaring bullies in the world.
Morals, ethics, compassion and empathy are needed for society to function.
❤
Absolutely 💯 ❤
Yep. And it gets worse all the time.
Yeah, why are sensitive people getting the "there's something wrong with you" label? Is there not much wrong with insensitive people? Why don't they get the "there's something wrong with you" label? Although that's what's wrong with the western world, you have to fit into this "normal" region, anything outside of that and you're weird/bonkers/crazy/mental etc
Absolutely! Bullies!
It’s very difficult to be around people who aren’t sensitive. To be around people who don’t let you rest or recharge. To work with people who cut you off after they ask you something and don’t want to listen to what you have to say because it takes more than a second to answer their question. To constantly be told not to react to things just because it doesn’t bother others. Sick of it…
I'm really tired of being being snubbed at work. Being cut off in mid sentence and then they start talking to someone else.
@@robertpolnicky7702 I totally get it ! I work with someone that does that all the time !
What, you can’t rest even in Haeven?
Yes, that's all very true. Especially that part when people don't respect our condition or try to be a bit more understanding of our needs.
It's not just being sensitive to sounds, etc its the fact that I feel like the sound is attacking me making me feel drained or that I need to escape from it. We literally do feel everything so intensely unfortunately the world just doesn't understand.
I think we need to start owning it and letting people know that they need to respect our needs a bit more. 😢
After decades of trying to fit in with others, I finally realised that it isn't worth the effort
I am an HSP and I've never had anxiety or depression. I'm not weak and miserable. It's just that
my world is overstimulating and it makes me mad, irritated and burnt out so I break down and cry but it's to release it all. When you look at nature, there's nothing in it that's an offense to the senses. This modern world is unnatural to human beings. All the noise, artificial smells and artificial lights, too much!
Capitalism, modernity, productivity, and efficiency - all of these make the environment overwhelming. We are taught at an early age that we need to always be productive, and that we need to serve, create or produce (related to labor, wealth and finances) to be recognized as a member of the society. Most of the time people who work for money, are forced to be productive and efficient because they need to earn money to survive
"When you look at nature, there's nothing in it that's an offense to the senses." Yeah no, that's ridiculous. There are absolutely things in nature that are an offense to the senses. Ever had the sun in your eyes? Stood close to a loud waterfall? Been stuck out in the rain, cold and wet? Been bitten by a mosquito? Encountered a dead animal that is rotting? Stepped in feces? Been sprayed by a skunk? This is all nature.
Nature isn't some place where all the animals get along and everything is good and happy and perfect, only tarnished by humans. Nature is brutal, which is part of its beauty. It isn't good to create an idealized version of nature that strips out that part of it
I became a horticulturalist such a rewarding job-- growing beautiful plants and helping people to know how as well..
What a lucky person you are that you've never had those issues! I'm high sensitive and suffer from them a lot. I wish you all the best.
Thank you and i love that you shared this. If we Accept our HSP children, they will accept themselves
As an hsp I find I’m very attuned to other people’s energy. For me it is the most exhausting and difficult aspect to deal with. I’m drawn to calm and peaceful people with predictable behaviours and I avoid loud, erratic, angry or negative folks. I have a tendency to shed friends, often because I’ve been hurt by them. It’s really unfortunate but I just can’t seem to toughen up. Do I dislike being an hsp? I’d have to say yes. Even though there are some positive aspects to it, having to constantly fend off all the daily assaults on my nervous system just sucks the joy out of life.
Yes. This is exactly how it feels. Well said. I'd love it if Emma did a video on how to cope as an HSP.
I have a tendency to shed friends too (and family) for the same reason. I'm a guy. If one is sensitive and a guy, one gets in trouble even more in a way.
I understand.God helps me cope .Being in this horrible world tortured me .I need bad to end ,and trust God will end it.✝️❤️🙏
absolutely, am too sensitive which some people have known, and it makes me so uncomfortable because they start looking at me as if I have a clue already @@alixnorman7389
I can relate 💯 being HSP is exhausting …. It’s hard to just relax and be with people without feeling everything…..hard work …always 🥹😵💫
At some point, I decided that even though people think I'm weird for feeling too deeply, it's pretty weird that they just don't. 😊
Exactly.. As a HSP myself, I used to feel just abnormal. But then over the years I just surrounded myself with a bunch of people like me and now we just sit there and contemplate our existence together, while indulging in sensory stimuli at the same time😅. I don't want no division between us and others, every person's character is so nuanced. But honestly, the way people who are less sensitive perceive things just seems to lack color a bit lol. Why wouldn't you be slightly overwhelmed by the profoundness of ur own birth?
Never.thought.of.that.before.yes.i.need.a.program.like.that.aca.has.a.clue.
Yes!!!
"Am I EXTRA, or are you BASIC?!"
Same. I'm with you on that one. I'm weird and proud😂
Iam a older INFJ HSP... yrs ago I found Elaine's book and it all clicked. I always felt like I never fit in, I've been told I have too much empathy etc... I had trauma growing up and that with my sensitivity was overwhelming at times. Through my faith in Christ I have learned to be less anxious and have healed from many wounds. Today I embrace my sensitivity and know I am wonderfully created by a God who loves me. I cry easily, laugh and really care about animals and people. when it all becomes too much I send it up. love yourself, love others...❤
Elaine who?
Holy moly sounds exactly like me! 🩷 I don’t know you but I love you! I’m also an Infj-t HSP who also has childhood trauma, loves Jesus, & has always been told those things as well.. I’m young and it’s been a rough ride, but hearing about your healing is very inspiring ❤ God bless you
@@rpn3581Elaine Aron- she's the one who discovered the sensitive trait! highly recommend her book
Same here sir, INFJ-T HSP.
Ah that’s beautiful to hear
I call it a blessing and a curse. I also wouldn't trade being sensitive for anything. When I was a child I was called tender hearted. I was also told that I'm a crybaby and to stop being so sensitive. I was a very anxious young child. Puberty seemed to buffer things a tiny bit. During menopause and after, my sensitivity is back at childhood level. Only now, as an adult, I know the real horrors of the world. It's been incredibly overwhelming at times, especially these days. Thank you for sharing this, it helps. I wish we made up at least half of the population, maybe the world would be a better place.
Same I was always called a cry baby and I overly sensitive etc It's intensified since Menopause!!!! I cry at the drop of a hat ... and My anxiety is really bad too
@@HeavenlyPresley-Tonya I have ADHD, and menopause causes it to intensify. I didn't get diagnosed till 59. I also sincerely believe I'm on the Autism Spectrum. It's a tough time for sensitive people. Make sure you're doing things that give you joy. Try to give yourself a break from the news. I finally learned that if I can't change it or fix it, then worrying about it doesn't help. It only hurts us. Our tears, I believe, is because our body is overwhelmed by the emotion so, we cry. I'm grateful, everyday, that I'm a sensitive person. In what seems like a world filled with hateful people, be proud of your kindness, caring and tears.❤️
@@susanhunter9196 Thanks for the message Yes very true it can be overwhelming at times - but We show the world how you can be Loving Kind Caring - Nice to people Polite etc -- I cry in public and do not care who sees me anymore I am older now LOLLL but I have Bipolar 2 Which is horrid and CPTSD from Trauma Abuse SA DV and Abandoned as a child by parents etc Trauma has been my middle name BUT I stick it out all the emotions nightmares etc -- It's H*LL but I don't let it end my life -- I Love being sensitive My Grown boys don't too many hugss etc loll and I Love you's and kisses on their cheeks and on and on hahaha
same here, glad I am not alone, i just found this channel , so glad to read these comments!
I’m super sensitive and the cruelty of the world torments me.
This is so inspiring. My mind has been consumed with thoughts of him. It's been 6zmonths since he left, and the pain feels like a physical ache. The laughter, the memories, the adventures they're all gone. I've tried to distract myself, but the harder I try, the more I think about him. How do people truly move on? The memories are still so vivid, and I miss him more than words can express.
Letting go of someone you love is incredibly hard. I went through a similar experience when my twelve-year relationship ended. I couldn't bear to lose him, so I did everything I could to rekindle our relationship. Eventually, I sought the help of a spiritual counselor, who guided us back together.
A spiritual counselor? That sounds fascinating. How can I reach out to him?
His handle is Father Tosin Ayodele . He specializes in rekindling the spark in broken relationships.
Thank you so much for sharing this I really appreciate your honesty and openness.
“Sensitivity may take some extra time to rest to process this information”.
I like that.👍🏼
being extroverted and highly sensitive often shows up as extreme people pleasing and surrendering our own boundaries. recognizing this has been the first step to me finding my peace and realizing that it is ok to be sensitive and ask other people to respect my needs
Ty for this comment. 2 for 2 there myself.
Very insightful comment.
Thanks for the comment, really needed to see this💕
Wow! It's like you know me😂
I’ve been in that club, but I’m trying to only be a part-time member😂
It’s just so scary when people always leave you for it. At first they love exactly that about you. But then there comes the day they think it’s annoying.
Most of the time people don't even love themselves or struggle to accept their own selves, so don't worry about those people that you wrote about, cause they don't even care about themselves and so they treat others with the same inconsistency.
😢
@@sabrinamystified i absolutely agree. I made the same experiences. They try to figure out what is good for them, it might take them time. Has nothing to do with me
I’m on the autism spectrum. The energy from others literally hurts. I’m here because of that.
Same here. I just break when I see feel too many faces. Autism is so hard to manage w too many ppl around.
@@lizvlx Yes it is! I love having alone time each day just to be quiet.
I feel other pain as well as there joy.
My husband is always like, “can’t you just take a pill so you stop worrying?” Aka so he doesn’t get inconvenienced by my anxiety. But everyone loves how I keep the household running smoothly, always pack everything we might need, meals planned, cooked, and cleaned up after.
sorry but your husband is selfish 😢
Thank you for this!! I’ve certainly been told I’m “too sensitive.” Finally I realized that is just a common excuse for cruel and abusive behavior. Now in my 40s, I’m completely fed up with insensitive, unempathetic bullies. I want to surround myself exclusively with kind, caring people. And yes, being an HSP is a gift, not only to the world but also to ourselves. I think we experience life on a much deeper level than other people. We’re capable of extreme despair but also profound joy, clarity, wisdom and compassion.
Yes
Absolutely! 💕
Totally agree ❤
I read it is sign of higher intelligence.. I'm one.. in my middle 60's I glad I saw this wish I had seen it long ago.
I agree with joy, compassion, wisdom and understanding. I always feel sorry for people who are struggling in life and wish I could change the world.
Honestly this world is rough and how could we not be emotional and anxious. I wake up everyday feeling deeply sad for the world. Some loved ones tell me facts like we have medical advancements that allow us to live longer, we are generally less violent, and tell me that not all is lost. It's difficult for me to see grey. This may be a big component to highly sensitive people.
I often feel like a burden and how could I possibly be loved so I hide a lot of my feelings and become quite. I find that if I suffer aloud I make others suffer too. I think life is hard and some can handle it better. I unfortunately have to really work at it everyday to stay balanced. Thank you for your video. I hope to give myself some grace today.
Yes. Give yourself a lot of grace and love ❤
I feel seen by this comment. I’m sending you grace and love through this message board.
You are right. The world is deeply sad. And-I believe the world is deeply wondrous and beautiful too.
My own sensitivity seems to make me experience life more intensely, with higher highs and lower lows. I have the capacity to feel the world’s deep sadness. But I’ve discovered that I also hold the capacity to experience-vividly and deeply-the world’s joy and wonder. I’m continually learning how to keep myself grounded in that balance. And to not discount my deep experience of the world just because some people don’t understand it.
The balance of life is there my friend, whether we feel it or not. I hope your journey gets easier. You are more deserving of love than you know
My dad was a combat vet and was often frustrated with me, if not downright pissed off. He taunted me for being a “momma’s boy,” but she, in addition to locking me outside as a 3 year old to get me out of her hair, once forced me back outside in the snow, bleeding, because a bully much older than me (I was a 1st or second grader) had attacked me. She told me to fight my own battles. I’m rambling, but even as an adult at church, I said something to the pastor. Later, I thought about what I said and thought it might have sounded insensitive. I tried later to clarify what I meant, and it pissed him off. He semi-yelled, “You need to stop being so sensitive!” Apparently other men in the church had been complaining about me being too sensitive. It took a while, but I finally took a long look at them and realized I was ok, and they were insensitive a holes.
Good for you! I think it takes some serious strength to be able to assert who you are like that. Strenth comes in many forms.
❤❤❤❤
You aren't the problem, you're the solution. You're caught at the intersection of patriarchal values that have been needing recessed by men because it's hurting men, but they have a hard time with having that conversation. You're also probably hitting their shadow, and when you first start to see it, you'll have a hard time with the person you are seeing your shadow in. Then you see yourself in it, and realize (hopefully) that it's something you need to do some emotional work on.
Sorry you went through that. You are not the problem.
There are plenty of assholes at church. Sometimes, the most "religious" of people are the people who will need the most forgiveness all the rest of the week. 🤔
As a man, I feel the shame can be much worse because we're supposed to be "tough"
It breaks my heart that this is the societal norm - boys are taught from very early on that they need to be a big boy, a tough little man, a strong man, not a pansy (or insert other derogatory shaming term here), etc. This is perpetuated basically from birth onwards, at home and with peers.
My personal belief is that what makes a man strong is being open to what they're feeling and not afraid to feel it, express it as appropriate (sometimes it benefits everyone to hold on to things for a bit of time to keep going, like in an ER trauma - I know from experience that staying in the focused, results-driven state until it's over, but then we find a time and place some time later to break down and feel it), and working through it.
Sending supportive energy your way. 🧡
I'm sorry for What you've Gone Through.. Being Tough or strong is a Mentality.. It never means that you should Suppress your emotions...
Lets embrace the gift of Sensitivity 🎉
Im so sorry to hear this. I have a boy that is HSP, he have all the traits. I want him to know that God created him this way for great purpose. That he doesnt have to be ashame.
@@resplandece2corintios464 that is awesome. Don't worry. My parents were old school and didn't express emotions well. I'm sure your family will be great!
I understand why you feel that way
Sensitive people gave us Winnie the Pooh and Paddington Bear. Imagine a Pooh-less childhood. That chubby little cubby all stuffed with puff enriched us all.
"Sensitive has been a bad word". I was also told that I took things "WAY too seriously" or "can't take a joke", or "too sensitive". But then again, those folks turned out to be toxic. Well, that explain why Ilse Sand's book is titled "Highly Sensitive People in an Insensitive World". Ilse Sand, a Danish therapist/psychologist, wrote her book based off of Elaine Aron’s book, and Ilse has also a test in her book as well for HSPs.
Agreed. The way I look at it is why would he go out of your way to give harmful or humiliating jokes. I can take a joke that doesn't involve me being the butt of the joke
A perfect marriage or relationship is an illusion; there's no universal playbook for making them work. What's effective for one couple may not apply to another. Nevertheless, I've come to understand that there's always a solution to be found. Half a decade ago, my wife and I faced such trials in our marriage that divorce seemed inevitable. Yet, through perseverance and determination, we navigated through the rough waters and emerged stronger, reunited, and more resilient
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I cant live without him, I love him so much. wish I can get him back I can do anything to have him back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
Its always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is Shelly Renee White
thank you, but how do i reach her?
look her name up online, you will find all you need to know about her. she is definitely going to help.
I remember moments when I was a child trying to hide my tears and hide the fact that I was highly sensitive. I tend to get teary easily, feeling the pain/hardships of others, even in moments when I only hear about the situation or hear about someone's pain, not actually seeing it with my own eyes. And I've always felt ashamed of tearing up. As an adult, I've read The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine N Aron, and I've done the corresponding workbook, which has helped me to accept that I'm highly sensitive. It's still something I struggle with, and I feel like social anxiety is related to the fact that I am highly sensitive and don't want to appear so to others. Harder since I am naturally shy and quiet. But, I know that being highly sensitive makes me more empathetic, gentle, and supportive.
If I'm honest, I now think that when I'm on an anti-depressant (winter months), it's much easier being me. I get to have the good parts w/o the crushing emotions.
It sounds like you’re on a beautiful path! ☀️
Sounds like you are Autistic. Look up Autistic masking in females. I believe high sensitivity and Autism overlap a lot if its not the same thing all together.
@@susie5254omg when you say antidepressants being winter months do you mean that you feel depressed during the summer ? Because same
Is it ironic that this video made me cry a little bit? "You care too much." Yes, yes I do. And it's sad that more people don't.
Same here
Same here too! ❤
Oh my goodness! Thank you for acknowledging all the novels aimed at grade school children that include not only death, but fairly detailed descriptions of death. As a kid I was traumatized!
They do teach very cruel things at school. I'm german and we had to learn all about World War 2, with details about the concentration camps etc., horrible history, it was incredibly hard to deal with this for me at such a young age. The incentive was to prevent anything like that from ever being able to happen again by telling kids the truth. Which is a good intention, but those things were definitely traumatizing for me as well.
I can't even watch any movie about war now, it's all way too dark for me and gets me down so much. As an adult, at least we can protect ourselves somewhat from dark, cruel and violent input, by selecting what we watch. I also wished they wouldn't force school kids having to read/ watch certain things. I feel a lot of the suggestions for literature etc. aren't made by very sensitive people.
can we talk about Hatchet anyone???? also the one with george and lennie (can’t remember the title) was CRAZY too.
Same here! I hated when the teacher read us sad animal stories, like Black Beauty and The Yearling. I don’t care if they are classics, I would sit there and try not to cry!! I hated them!
Crying about those books is fine. I still think about how awful some of the situations were, but thats life. These things happen. I never hated the teachers or school for showing that, I think it was a good preparation. Teenagers need to learn how to process those sad stories for when they inevitably happen to them or people they know.
Thanks, Emma. I've known I'm highly sensitive for a long time, but I didn't realize just how much shame I've continued to carry around because of it, and how often I repress my natural responses in an effort to be that more culturally idealized citizen.
I hear you. I’ve definitely struggled with that!
"I am beautifully and wonderfully made"❣️
I love how you specifically call out the sensitivity group, the inner war, the gift, the need for us in society. so grateful.
You described me in so many ways! I've been told all my life that I'm too sensitive and caring... BUT my husband sees it as a beautiful thing. It's one of the things that attracted him to me. ALSO The closer I got to Jesus, He showed me who I'm in Him. I started to realize what would the world be without my type. Of course God knew me before He knitted me in my mother's wound (Psalm 139:13-16). My sensitivity GIFT has help so many people in my designing business working with grieving families. They always tell me that I've help them through this process or I'm calming and are taken by surprise at first that it's not just about exchanging monies for a product...it's about glorifying the LORD for a higher purpose leading to HIM.
God is good.He gives me gentle treatment.✝️❤️🙏
Can I ask more about your designing business for grieving families? Interested in different line of work...
This is so true! I’m too sensitive, the bad part is I care about some people and when they don’t seem to care about me it hurts.I’ve gotten angry in the past,now that I’m older I try to let go.if I do something for someone I try not to expect a response, or anything in return.but it’s hard sometimes,hoping somebody cares about me.(wah) I’m learning to be my own best friend.
in time, you will find there will be a few select people who are your people.. I have only 2 non-related.. they are my people.. The others do and expect nothing in return--however magically you may run into another HSP.. out of many people I did--they are my two bestest friends ever..
I have learned to appreciate my sensitivity. It is a gift I've been given and is, in fact, my strength. I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Yes!!! I feel the same! 🎉
I'm with you Emma on being an HSP. I'm an introverted HSP. Yes, I have been often told that I am too sensitive. I have definitely got tougher, but I don't want to lose the caring sensitive side of me. It is a bit hard when you are constantly put down for being sensitive. And I'm afraid that is by someone who either lacks empathy or has very little of it. I will keep calm and carry on. :)
Yes! We can do this. ☀️
OMG thank you for this. I really feel validated by this video. I am truly, squarely, smack-dab in the camp of HSP. I'm sensitive to light, sound, and emotions of others. It seems my life motto is actually of two memes...1. Hold on, let me over-think this" and 2. I'll get over it, I just need to be dramatic first" with a pinch of crazy cat lady 😺🦄
I get overwhelmed very easily by strong emotions and have an intense household that never let's up on loud sounds. Also super sensitive with smell so I ALWAYS have some aromatherapy on because I can just smell the dirt and negativity of the day. (Maybe because of asd but whatever). I totally resonate with this ♡ thank you so much!
More people need to understand the part with taking breaks. Sometimes I just need my quiet time to recharge :( ❤
Love LOVE the video. It’s helping me. But remember, EXTROVERTS CAN BE SENSITIVE TOO.
I am a combination of introvert and extrovert. I am highly sensitive
My sensitivity allows me to feel God so strongly.
So despite the pain that comes with it. I will always love it.
This actually made me cry, even if I’m still a bit ashamed to admit it. It’s not always easy, but I have always loved my sensitivity because it allows me to see life and the world with more beauty. Your videos have helped me a lot, thank you 🙏🏼
I agree with you! I have often been told that I am “too sensitive “ but I often feel sorry for those who “aren’t sensitive enough”. They are missing out on all those things we perceive that they cannot.
I was shamed too and didn't cry for 60 years. Now I can cry and accept myself 💖💪🙏
In glad you can cry now and feel good about it. It's a good release
I needed this today. What fantastic timing. Thank you so much 🙏.
Thank you for this video. I’m highly sensitive and I hated this part of myself for so long. I care so much about everything. I had never heard that it could be a positive thing.
It is a constant internal tug of war. As a man, it is very difficult! I find social interaction with people even family members at times exhausting. Too much external stimulation leads to feelings of being overwhelmed, depression, and anxiety. To cope, I stay home to isolate myself from overexposure. I limit my time on the internet and especially social media platforms to avoid sensory overload and feelings of hopelessness.
I'm an HSP. I'm 45 now, and learned to except this about myself. Still though, I'm stunned by the strength of it and other people's failure to understand. Ex. This morning I was I'm the car running an errand with my husband. A song came on the radio and I quickly asked if he minded if I changed the channel. See, it's as though I can so feel the singer's pain as he signs, it's usually cause to make me feel down for hours. My husband said "Huh..I've heard song 3 or 4 times now and couldn't even tell you what it's about."
Thank you so much for everything you do!
Much love, health, and happiness over the holidays and into the new year!
❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for this relatable and timely video! I've learned about and embraced the fact that I'm likely an HSP, and would love to see more content on how to thrive in an extroverted, noisy, busy world that leaves me feeling consistently overwhelmed.
I struggle with this in friendships. I seem to think and care so much more about my friends than they do about me. I’m not sure if they are showing the “normal” amount, and I’m just overly sensitive, or that they don’t care about me as much as I do about them.
Oh my gosh~ sounds like my exact words. You have a good point. We need to do some soul-searching
❤Love to hear Emma's point of view on your comment❤
Exact same thing. I'm starting to think HSPs need to have get togethers.
@@ilovepickle I agree totally with you. Yet I truly feel that the "H" part of acronym ve removed as its just speaking that into our being~ saying the word highly. We need to speak into ourselves confident words😇
Oh my gawd I thought I was the only one 😢
Easier said than done! My sensitivity fuels my anxiety and keeping a perspective becomes challenging. 😥
Keep working at it. It takes a ton of repetition! Journaling also helps me a lot.
Holy s***. I finally know what this is. I've been stressed out the last few months and right now almost all sounds are just too much. I can't even really listen to my favorite music anymore. And now that I watched this video it all clicked. Feeling very intense emotions, reading the room instantly... Deep down I always suspected that I'm highly sensitive but bc of the stigma I didn't want to admit it to myself.
You made me cry, I haven’t felt so validated. Thank you.
💯 Spot on! I was diagnosed with Autonomic Nervous System Dysfunction at John’s Hopkins. The doctor said to me I was born with a lion in the room. That my hyper sensitivity was like a superpower and at a genius level. It explained a lot about myself. But being so different was not positively accepted. I always knew I was sensitive to everything around me. I could pick up how someone was feeling by their facial expression. I could feel subtle nuances about things that were going on in society before it was “a thing”. Problem solving was an obsession. But I felt like a lost soul. An outcast. Particularly in my family. Perceived as weak, over emotional, over dramatic etc. It’s been a curse tbh. Just wish that I had this knowledge many years ago. Great video! ☮️
“You have a gift that the world needs. Don’t hide it under a bushel.”
Thank you. Wish this was around when my parents encouraged my siblings to help "toughen me up". There was no safe place, being bullied at school too. I longed to be invisable. Ended up hanging out at the park a lot
My husband divorced me because of me having HSP trait after 4 years of being married. He said it’s too much for him to handle my sensitivities to smells, noises and vibrations, also having allergies. It broke my heart, but now I know that my divorce was the blessing in disguise. He was not the right person for me and now I have a therapist who is also HSP who inspires me to use my very sharp sense of intuition as HSP to “select” people who feel right. It’s incredible how my life became easier since I started to operate relying on my super power, my intuition. I became as an X-ray scanner, I just “smell” trouble from far away.
Our sensitivities are our superpowers ❤🎉
it is a super power.. I'm 65.. welcome --you are blessed to know about it early--use it .. Blessings friend..
When It Gets Interesting Is When You're HIGHLY Sensitive & An EXTROVERT! I Think It Confuses People How I Can Be So Outgoing & Really Like Interaction With People & Yet Still Get "Touchy" About What I Experience Through My Five Senses, Or My Reactions To Things Like Conflict Or Violent Material Or Sensory Input That Bombards Us - ALL Around Us All The Time....They Are Actually Part Of The Same Life Experience For Me & I Feel Them All Deeply! I Am A Sensitive, Deeply Feeling, Intuitive, Creative & Empathic Person On This Planet & I Will No Longer Apologize For It! Being Criticized For Being Just How I Am Has Caused Me Enough Self Esteem For Too Long - Now I Occasionally Hear My Sensitivity Being Pointed Out But In A Positive Way! And Now If Not By Someone Else - I'll Do It!😁
Thank you for reminding me....I think a lot of my struggles come from not accepting myself, comparison to others and suppressing my emotions.
I went through many years yearning to be different, constantly working on myself, always trying to figure out what my significant other wanted, so I could become that… never feeling good enough or able to be loved for who I actually am!
I’ve just discovered I am an HSP, it gives me so much happiness knowing that I am like this, being able to learn more and look into it more will definitely help me to navigate the world in a different way, a better way hopefully.
🥰 isn’t it incredible when you first find out? Especially once I did the exercise of looking at my past through the lens of being an HSP, I had some incredible aha moments!
I'm an hsp..I can remember sobbing b/c the cows in the field were getting wet b/c it was raining...my mother would try to console me to no avail...she'd tell me the cows liked the rain, it made them feel good but I wasn't buying it..She realized I needed balance...we all do.,,,some of us have to tough enough to do the hard things...you might think the world would be a better place if everyone was an hsp but it wouldn't.......I've never thought of myself as flawed...I realized we are all different and it's a good thing b/c it provides the balance we need to have a functioning society. Don't beat yourself up for being an hsp, but also don't beat up others who are not..and be receptive to constructive criticism b/c we hsp's can easily have blind spots. We need tender hearts but we also need tough hides. And don't beat up people who aren't sensitive people..that would be insensitive..they have their reasons for being the way they are. We can learn from each other and find the balance we all need.
This sounds exactly like me. And it hasn’t gotten any better over the years.
I’m 25 years old and I spent my whole life thinking something was wrong with me, or that I was cursed because I’m a highly sensitive person and didn’t know it. Didn’t know anyone else in my 25 years who was or is like this. I literally cried watching this video it made me happy and sad knowing I’m not alone and HSP is a real thing. Thank you !! 😊
❤❤❤ that’s me! I lost a boyfriend because i was to sensitive- which was for the best!
This was a great video!
WOW! Less than a minute in and you had me. EVERYONE that is close to me has told me nearly all my life that I'm TOO SENSITIVE. I did discover that I was HSP about 15 or more years ago, and I never hated it, I just have a hard time regulating emotions, especially when they are sadness, despair, grief, loss. I mean anyone would, but I get fixated. I am in therapy right now, so that helps. HSP is not a curse, it's my superpower, but I need to control my powers not let them control me.
Thank you, I needed to hear this to realize that the internal battle is real, I am practicing self acceptance so I see still battle my sensitivity. I’m realizing that while growing up my sensitive nature was what made me different from others. I deeply feel, including the deep heartedness,shame, weakness, and judgements from others -because it was my loved ones saying them, those comments turned into my internal dialogue- criticisms like “you are so nosy, you are too sensitive, you take things personal, and your so naive”. To me the idea of writing a letter to my sensitivity brought me to tears; clearly there is some healing and acceptance being done here and I’m so grateful. This is the essence of my higher self and I need this part of me to be present, to love fully, and get along in life with minimal anxiety and ruminations. Be well with love light.
i understand you! I feel like I could have written this comment word for word
🥰🥰🥰
Omg it’s like you’re speaking directly to and about me. Thank you for your content
OH MY GOSH!! I have needed this my whole lifetime 😂 it explains why I couldn’t do my job anymore! Thank you so so much! I’ve gone to therapy blah blah blah and you have guided me to get more information! Thank you!
Thank you so much I was mid crying well watching this just about hitting a dart into a wall accidentally and when I saw this I realised that me beings sensitive is not bad my mom always told me this but this really helped more then anything
Ok, this one made me cry. Thank you for saying it could be an asset and NOT a hinderance.
Absolutely 100% an asset!! I wouldn’t give up my high sensitivity even if I could! We feel so deeply and therefore get to see and feel and experience beauty, love, bliss, passion… with an intensity that others will never know!
I’ve known that I was a highly sensitive person since I was a toddler, I just didn’t know it had a name. Thank you for helping me feel like I have a superpower.
I am always so fascinated by individuals who know so early on! Did you go through any stretches of time feeling weak or different or out of place or too vulnerable or broken? Gosh I had to go through a lot of that!!
@@emotioncoachchristineyes
male HSP here. Thank you for your video about HSPs to shed more light on the subject. I want so bad for society to one day understand the richness and value of HSPs instead of running us over with aggression and loudness.
My question is, How do I NOT internalize that shame of others who have told me I "lack confidence" or I need to "be less sensitive" as if there's something wrong with me.
By asserting that there is *strength* in being emotionally vulnerable, emotionally available. By normalizing that sensitivity quality in a matter-of-fact way, and reinforcing it toward other people, they begin to respect you more & more, AND, then they are influenced by you, and you'll begin celebrating this quality in you. My husband is HSP and staunchly so. I wouldn't want him any other way because he is himself. He should be allowed to be himself. As should you. I wish you well. Keep be authentically you.
Maybe start with asking yourself what you get for shame and if you find it to be nothing of value, you can choose to stop identifying with it. Of course that's a process but at least you've got a direction and choice. That's agency which fosters generative drive and you're halfway there.
I'm a male HSP too. I've wasted too much time on the pipe dream that one day society would understand our richness and value. Society understands your value if you present it in the right currency. A healthy society is not going to be disposed to listen to a "feverish, selfish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy" (to quote George Bernard Shaw). High sensitivity is not an excuse to skip out on hard work. We have the responsibility to do something with our sensitivity, make something that adds demonstrable richness and value. That includes being more deliberate in how we present ourselves. The dream of being able to go through the world always being authentic is a childish conceit that everyone has to outgrow to be useful in society. Maybe it's harder for us? Too bad.
Have the Courage to face the Truth about yourself, no matter how Beautiful it is...
While I can’t imagine how it must be as a male HSP, I certainly understand shame, and even as a female HSP feeling weak/ less then/ broken accompanied me much of my life. It helps me (in regards to others) to ask the question: who are they to judge me/ to decide whether I’m broken or not or whether I lack confidence. Who are they to make that judgment? If they looked at me from a place of unconditional love, they wouldn’t see lack, they would see my beautiful, gentle, caring, loving soul!
It's good to have feelings with you guys, it means that you don't have depression, as depression is the absence of emotions, and remember that feelings can always be dealt with
This video let me thinking deeply. I'm an introvert and I've always feel inadequate, weird & different in a negative way. I recently discovered my feelings developed at a very young age because my parents said to everyone around me that i was shy they even said like I was not even there. I used to observe people very carefully and enjoy listening to adult conversations. I'm 38 years old now I've lost count on how many time I've had to mask my personality to fit into social settings. The moment I start acting like my real self I always notice strange looks at me, I still don't know why I've always taught is my personality. I don't believe I'm an HSP however I am hyper sensitive to stimuli. This world needs more diversity and acceptance.
I definitely agree! The world needs more diversity and acceptance and I hear you on social settings. I’ve always felt out of place and the need to play a certain role. Have you taken the HSP test on Dr Elaine Aron’s website? That helped me to figure out that I definitely am an HSP!
I was born deaf and when i was 13 i was diagnosed with diabetes. Since then i was in and out of the behavioral hospital and put on medications and never helped, only made things worse. I'm 27 now, with a 5 year old son and a wife. I have just learned about HSP and believe this is something i have been dealing with all my life. The only way i could show my emotions was to lash out. These past few days i have taken time for myself to recharge my brain. Im currently dealing with a divorce and its even harder when my mind is running away. Thank you!
You are a beautiful human being Emma, and your content is super helpful to me.
Thank you ❤
Very accurate. I've been told since I was a little girl that I wear my heart on my sleeve. But it's who I am. My teens and 20s were hard because of that. I'm grateful to have found my place in the world.
What I wish most is not that I cared less, but that people cared more. I'm a sensitve extrovert. That means I find myself in the thick of very emotional situations often. I'm not afraid to cry in public or to be vulnerable. I don't shy away from running to comfort those in pain, even if I don't know them well. I think it makes me a better friend, volunteer minister, wife and mother.
Caring sometimes hurts, but I'm ok with that because I know I can survive and heal and help others heal too. The key for me is knowing when to take a break. If my self care is not right I can't function well. I'm still learning balance here. Thank you for this well put video. And thank you for the new perspective. It will help me to make peace with my anxiety, I can't change it. I just need to care for it
Emma im beyond thankful that I found your RUclips videos you made me feel so much better about myself especially with this video and you've helped me so much when I couldnt afford to see my therapist thank you Emma ❤❤❤
I love this so much! And one thing I'd like to mention is that as a HSP there are people who will like to imply or outright say there's something "wrong" with you. These are individuals who are uninterested in the minds and view of other people, oftentimes narcissists.
Growing up as a HSP my stepmother would deliberately antagonize me by literally implying I was being antagonistic or seeking attention for simply wanting a quiet break (preferably without anyone even noticing). As an adult I can see that those would be motives *she* would have with her behavior, but not motives I've ever had. Her screaming and yelling at me over her own inability to understand anyone but herself really did make me think there was something "wrong" with me and sent me on a very unhelpful path for many years. I think that many people who "self-diagnose" themselves with ADHD or Autism are actually highly sensitive people, and/or introverts who feel misunderstood by the world. My advice is to proudly own your identify as a HSP, and not let the world make you feel pathologized for it.
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Oh man you had to go through a lot! I also had quite a lot of trouble with my stepmom. I think she’s also an HSP which makes it easier for me to understand why she could never handle being around me. I was just too much/ too intense and she had no idea how to set boundaries or protect her own energy.
Emma, each and every episode of the series is a precious gift. Thank you!
I'm trying to enjoy them one by one and not to binge watch them, I am listening some again, I am rewinding parts
Finally something clicks with my scientifically oriented yet sensitive brain! And presented in such a down to earth, peaceful manner. Thank YOU ❤
I’m actually glad that I was told by my therapist that I was a HSP. It gave me a sense of relief and understanding about why my behaviors were the way they are even when I was a kid. Though it took a bit of explaining to my parents that this was the reason for my struggles with emotional reactivity because it’s easy to attribute that to my brain injury, autism, and ADHD diagnoses.
Part of me kind of wishes that I could have been told that I was an HSP when I was much younger because it would’ve saved me a lot of strife and stress of being told so much and many times that I over react or that my emotions come off as too strong for the given situations that I find myself in. I have been fortunate that people didn’t get angry at me for being the way I was, mostly because of the fact that I was born with cerebral palsy and having to be in an already very inaccessible and not so inclusive world was already a very clear reason for why I had struggled with my emotions and stuff like that.
It doesn’t help that I am also an introvert on top of it. Introverts more often tend to be HSPs.
I teared up many times watching this. I’m highly intuitive, and I see that as a gift now that I’m 49 years old. But the sensitive stuff has always bothered me. I wish I knew I was HSP long ago especially with the smells and sounds. I get emotional when I see an old couple holding Hands tightly. Or beautiful small things like a tree changing colors.🥺 and it’s been hard so I stay alone a lot. Sucks
I have never felt so heard and validated until watching this video. Thank you for helping me understand myself even more. I struggle with this so much.
I hadn't realized HSP was genetic, 'born with it'. I've been told its a trauma response. I don't necessarily feel shame, but it is exhausting to feel on alert, affected by noise, smell, flickering lights. Im aware of being self compassionate, listening to what my body needs. Sometimes i just want better integration so I have the energy to use my creativity.
Yes! I spent a long time wondering what must have caused the trauma that I supposed was at the root of some of my traits. It's been relieving to discover that it's probably just innate sensitivity -- no pathology.
I was wondering if HSP is genetic. The noisy nephew who now stays more at mum's house, he won't eat certain foods due the smell or messes about in school yet still manages to listen to what teachers says.
Evidently gene expression can change over time / generation with small t trauma. Regardless, I felt some relief having more info from Emma.
@@LoneOrcaI wondered all the same things, only recently hearing of HSP& realizing that I am one. I think I've just been more sensative to the bad things that happened in my life, like HSPs are more prone to be traumatized. It also makes you a target to bullies & a scapegoat in the family dynamic. It's good to finally realize there's nothing wrong with me, I'm just different.
Since a child I have been overly sensitive -- BUT My Trauma's have intensified it and being I am older / menopause -- My Parents were NOT sensitive at all just the opposite my siblings either none of my family --- that I can remember grandparents etc Maybe one of My grandmothers -- but I don't think its Genetic from research I've done extensively -- so I disagree with that -- but that's my opinion
WOW!! I stumbled upon this video this morning… And of course the title captured my attention because as a child, I was labeled, “too sensitive” - A description that seemed to stay attached to me for many years… In the past 20 years, through my relationship with God, I have learned many things about the gift of sensitivity… And embracing it… Which I’m happy to say I now live in that reality… but you are the first person I have heard speak about sensitivity as a ‘gift’ and I loved everything about what you said and even heard a few things that made me think deeper on the subject. Thank YOU for sharing your insights and I look forward to more of them as I have now subscribed to your channel. Im a writer and this inspired me to pick up once again a piece I began writing a few years ago. God bless and Merry Christmas!!!
This video explained a lot why I suffered so many nightmares as a child, seeing things, sleep walking, and add on some childhood abuse. I have always been very sensitive and feel things deeply. Thank you for this video Emmavut brought a lot of clarity to me!❤
50% of highly sensitive people are introverts, and 50% are extroverts. It's 50/50 between men and women. We make up about 20 to 26% of the population. And I've devoted my life to helping people see their sensitivity as a superpower. It is easy to let go of negative emotions, anxiety, and trauma and feel their healthy self-concept safely, rapidly, and holistically. My only regret is that I didn't learn about all the powerful tools that allow us access to the excellent resources within us!
We were the ones who helped people survive by seeing or sensing things that they didn't. We were also the caretakers, the philosophers, healers, and so much more!
I am an HSP, and this describes me 100% !
I needed to hear this. How healing knowing this is. You are serving your purpose. Thank you.
Ten years ago, I learned to say, “ I am as sensitive as I am, and I intend to defend myself”.
I'm so sensitive and I really do wish I could turn I off,thank you for your upload it has helped me to try and see it differently.
This is why people must not be afraid to stab societal norms in the back and rebel against them.
Oh my God, As you were explaining, it was like you are talking about my life and experiences!!!
Thank you for reminding me the advantages of being a HSP, although I have to work a lot on it, but most of all, it is such a gooooood feeling that I am not alone in this big world! 🙏🏻💐🥰
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Thank you! You are amazing! I have read Elaine’s book and another book but you have put everything so eloquently in a short time. I love to know that there are some people that understand what it’s like to be me! Love your work generally and thank you from the bottom of my heart!
The HSP must allow for this. I often need space, time, quiet etc. well over the allotted amounts. Dreaming doesn't happen all at once. I am amazed, though, at others who can clean their kitchens in a half-hour, while mine never seems to get done. These are wonderful people, too.
The hardest part for me is work. Dealing with deadlines, overbearing bosses… Public speaking. It’s all too much. I took an easier job and then wound up getting promoted! A promotion I didn’t even want. Now the job stress has become too much and I’m looking for an easier job.
59, and have never been ashamed of being a HSP. But growing up in a narcissistic family, my gifts were devalued and I was taken advantage of, priming me for a lifetime of narc abuse. Im learning to take back what Ive lost and hold on tightly to my gifts as I evolve and grow each day. Thanks for your youthful wisdom
Yes! Yes! Yes!!!
You are describing my feelings right now!!
Having struggles with my adult children.
I am back living in an environment that brings on this not-so-good feelings!!
I love hearing your talks!!
I pray that God WILL CHANGE ME!!
I reckon that there's an increased correlation of empathy in people who have actually had something rough happen to them in youth.
Whereas people who didn't have this happen or got positively pampered can't so much feel the pain indicators in others. They can't or won't really believe such bad stuff happens and can be so impactful. Their standard reaction to bad things heard is a driven anger and that's about the most of it. Because that's monetarily advantageous to set off at will in media. But they don't see the further nuance. It's a blessing and a curse on each side and whatever way you look at it.
As a woman, I feel
HSP can really lend to the way misogyny lands. It’s intense
what do you mean bx nerd ?
Yes all the above. It’s like being locked inside yourself. Very lonely. Thank you for this information.
Great content Emma! Thank you 😘
Could you please bring this topic more often?
It's really important to bring awareness to this matter. Whether you are a HPS or not
God bless you for sharing your knowledge with us ❤
I love this series. It’s so me. Thank you. BTW, I have a t-shirt that says: I don’t care who dies in the movie so long as the dog lives!
I live in Olympia Washington, and some of the most insensitive, judgemental, snobby, distant, conceited, uncaring, self-centered, unfriendly and "lacking any kind of compassion" people I have EVER met are members of the Presbyterian church that I am attending less and less.
I have never seen a bigger bunch of snobs !!!!!
Sad.
My Presbyterian family members are jerks! I am still searching for a new church, wishing you all the best
@@oddlibrarianout1295 Thank you so much. I hope you find a new church with nicer people in it soon. I totally quit going to mine, and am happier for it. Yes, toxic people are in church, too. Good luck, and take care.
❤
Thank you for this! I loved that you shared in perfect timing! I appreciate the sensitivity to which you deliver this. The tone and energy was soothing and nurturing. The way you also delivered in such a way that made me feel seen and appreciated. Felt like my inner child needed to hear this. ❤
Thank you! Finally I found somebody that recognize being sensitive as a gift. !!!
I have seen my sensitivity as a flaw because my mother has taught that you can't show your weakness by crying or being hurt by things others say or complaining. Now I have re-learned that it's better for me to let out my feelings (sometimes alone) than to smother and go on without acknoledging what I feel. If I do that those feelings at some point burst out of me unwanted. I might shout and show anger or act passive-aggressively. With my only child I have seen that my sensitivity helps me read my daughters needs and emotions. She is under 2 years old so she doesn't speak very fluently yet. Pardon my English. I was quite amotional as I wrote this.
Get ready! My son is almost 6 and he is an incredible being who challenges me more than anything else in my life! 😁 I think he is highly sensitive and he’s definitely an extrovert, super social, loves people, loves to mingle, which can be quite a challenge for my introverted HSP nature. And to feel the depth and intensity of his emotions is incredible and yet at times completely overwhelming and even heart breaking! He has taught me a lot about boundaries!! 🤗 Good luck, momma! Parenthood is beautiful!
You are an angel. Thank you so much for your videos. I have always been highly sensitive and for that reason suffer of many forms of panic and anxiety disorders. Your approach is the only one I have encountered that makes a lot of sense out of something that is both hard to describe and understand. Thank you so much for making it accessible!