Arnaldo Fernandes da Silva Filho yeah well I saw that years ago in a music video called "baby monkey riding backwards on a pig" which you should totally check out
Oh, "get a horse to come" as in approach you, not in the way I was thinking. The way I was thinking of was, admittingly, way weirder, but also more impressive.
Love Spit Take. I will say that O'Brien seems like the type of guy that has never said anything without a snarky/sarcastic tone to his voice. Must be why we love'em!
I truly dislike the spit take. I tried to be reasonable but I just don't like a watching/listening to a guy that looks and sounds dead inside. Give me some new guy over this garbage.
modetallah Alright. This fuckwit is done being reasonable, Cracked. It's time to cancel The Spit Take. In fact, cancel everything. It's the only way to be sure. I have a FAMILY, dammit.
If you recently said to yourself, “The only thing that could make this day tolerable is a guy doing magic tricks while engulfed in flames,” well, you’re in luck! In fact, this whole video will make it alllll better. #itsavideomfers
Weird topic, but still awesome. Though every time a new Spit Take episode comes out, I wonder why you've stopped playing kickass music when you've not showing the clips.
last time I tried to throw a baboon, it ripped my face off, handed me back my eyes, and made me watch it eat my face like raw pizza dough. We've been happily married for 28 years now. It's a good story at parties because it explains my horrible disfigurement and how we met at the same time which leaves me more time to drink myself into a quasi pain-free stupor and ignore the nagging voice in the back of my head that says I'm trapped in a living hell. Anyhoo, better go. It doesn't like me looking at computers.
Hold on, "Indian giver" isn't offensive. It's because the Europeans were always taking back land they "gave" to the natives. "sure, we'll give you all the land west of this river, forever" 15 years later "actually, we changed our minds, you gotta move 200 more miles west."
qwertzy121212 Actually most sources believe it stemmed from misunderstanding between Lewis and Clark and the Native Americans. Allegedly the Native Americans would share their stuff with the explorers but in their culture it was customary to repay a gift in kind and so they became offended when the Europeans didn't repay them for their kindness and hospitality. Therefore, they wanted their gifts back.
wait... i thought he was was the one that held all the memories of their people, and like was the only one who could see colors and had real emotions... sigh... i dont get it... i dont wanna watch the movie again.
J Jones If you insist, that's still what we call ourselves though. So unless you mean that it's offensive to people who are actually from India, i don't see it.
Horse Yoga and stretches are actually proven to help increase mobility in horses, reduce chances of arthritis and help cut down on vet and ferrier bills. Most barns do some form of horse yoga or stretching these days :D the horses love it too
the number 3 is a technique for make the horse more friendly. were invented for the aborigen of argentina. also the part in spanish SAY IT. just put a damn subtitle and will get it.
03:02 That ain't a cowboy m8, that's a Native from South-america, a Pampa Indian from Argentina. Maybe related to the Argentinian cowboys though, the Gauchos.
Goes together like crispy bacon and sliced tomato. Goes together like flannel sheets and a onesie! Goes together like a high speed chase and a traffic report helicopter! Ok, I'm done.
undetestable1 Don't let your experience here Jew you of a perfectly good word. I would suggest that you get a good Irish on then go to a ballgame; perhaps a Braves or an Indian game. While you're there you can call the ump a dirt blinded greasy Wop; then hopefully it won't matter as much anymore.
lol Atleast to of the race based insults you used apply to me or member of my family. How else am I supposed to get mad at people for using them if I keep saying Gyp. I feed off righteous indignation!
"How have we not made a movie about this guy showing up in the old west where everyone was impressed if you could get a horse to come by whistling at it?" Wait, WHAT? Oh THAT kind of come. Lol.
Peas and carrots, diced, go well together. Peanut butter doesn't go well with everything: try using peanut butter instead of refried beans in Texican foods like burritos and stuff from Taco Bell.
people : "awww animals are so cuteeee look at them omg!!!" people: * ignore and laugh at how animals are being hurt / exploited * people: "I FUCKING LOVE ANIMALS SO MUCH"
When you said "Where everyone was impressed if you could get a horse to come by whistling at it" I was terrified of the next scene and then embarrassed by my misinterpretation of that sentence.
'Cracked' video + Hershey product placement = $$$. Now that's a magical combination. Edit: By the way, please don't say 'competish'. It just sounds stupid.
That bear has me beat. I’m a grown-arse Woman who flipped over trying to get into a hammock, hit the brick wall behind it, fell to the concrete below & bruised a bone in my foot on the metal frame. I’m not allowed to use it if I’m home alone because it took me a while before I could move & my family is worried I’ll die before I can call for help next time. Not allowed to use ladders either unless they’re actually listening to me describe what I’m doing while my phone’s on speaker somewhere nearby but safe from falling... me, so they can cal 000 (Australian). On the other hand I AM on all the drugs. Just all of them. I know they do dog yoga & “doga” (2 different things) & I’m genuinely impressed by this amazing display. If you REALLY want to impress me, show me yoga with cats, 1 at a time sure but more than 1 cat (every species has an idiot cousin). Jack *~sigh~* if you don’t already feel bad about yourself, then clearly you lack the capacity & I’d just be wasting my time
When I was watching #3, I was hoping he would show a scene from 'The Lone Ranger'. My dad loves that movie so he shows it to me a lot and I've enjoyed it more than I originally expected. Regardless, I think it would've been a PERFECT example for the third one they showed. Albeit, I didn't know of the example they did show during #3; but I digress.
Mire frequent The Spit Take videos! Theyre the best. And btw you once had a video, where (among other things) a guy was trapped on a balcony of a burning building. It was filmed from across the street by some woman. Cant find it anywhere..
Fun Fact: Andre The Giant was notorious for never being "shitfaced". He could drink kegs and only feel slightly dizzy. The worst he got was after a night of heavy drinking (as wrestlers did back then) he complained of not feeling so good, threw up on an oncoming taxi, said he felt better, and went back inside for more drinks.
Resorting to making non-witty observations on random pairs of things in an "America's Funniest Home Videos" fashion? You guys just.. you make me openly exasperated sometimes.
I'm laughing so hard I owe you money! Damn I needed a good laugh! I had to pause this video several times just to laugh and come back and watch again! 😂 Thank you so very much for this post!
This video was underwhelming. Seemed like a poorly-written version of someone saying "hey, how can we get away with showing a list of cute videos without being to =3 about it?"
World's most dangerous card trick? Being on fire while doing card tricks does not make the card tricks dangerous because the fire isn't part of the card trick. The fire is what is threatening to destroy your body in your sad/desperate plea for attention; and the ones with the camera are thinking "I can get money for filming this idiot," instead of "wow, what a cool trick."
That's not "cowboy yoga", that's an Argentinian taming a horse in a regionally traditional, non agressive way. He makes the horse feel relaxed and earns his trust. No cowboys, no yoga.
SnuggleStruggle Awww. I was hoping someone would make up another one, and it would just keep going from there. Just be thankful I didn't go with "Goes together like Game of Thrones and porn". Because that makes about the same amount of sense and you know it. But, in the hope that someone does continue this little 'goes together like.....' contest, here's my next entry to get the ball rolling, so to speak; "Goes together like Bacon and Maple Syrup."
This was a somewhat clever way to 'make a category' to just show off some videos everyone's seen before. I mean, the title was actually honest, at least. Maybe this editing prowess should have been used on the "Heroes that would be Villains today" video.
To capture a wild pig with a monkey, you must first capture the wild monkey, then train it to not only ride the pig, but to love it enough to come back for another go, again and again, so you're not trading every monkey in for a single pig. Truly wild in every sense of the word.
yea ik this is an old episode, but i'm pretty sure they trained the baboons to attack and ride the boars in order to wear them down so the humans could rally them up and kill them for food... maybe not the first thing i'd think of, but hey, gotta work with what ya got. and apparently they had baboons laying around XD
...you usually have to go to very scary places on the internet to find such intimate horse-on-man action...places that even the nsa wouldn't record just in case your very online history has a new strain of std...
It can kill a horse to have no weight on its hooves for too long. They're built to have that wait on their hooves all the time, and I can't imagine the horse was happy or comfortable with the situation. It was probably staying still has a fear response.
So I think we can all agree that the hammock bear is the best thing ever
It's all down hill from there.
Arnaldo Fernandes da Silva Filho yeah well I saw that years ago in a music video called "baby monkey riding backwards on a pig" which you should totally check out
Oh you forgot "They go together like Fox News and utter stupidity".
You can't do that because they're the same thing.
Lewis Kinslayer OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Lewis Kinslayer: The Zing Stealer
***** If so what would be a compulsive zing suppressant?
I'll start the line with the compulsive need to facepalm over something said on fox news
*OOOoooh Get Faced Bill O'Reilly!*
You too Sean Hannity, you and your stupid wig.
Oh, "get a horse to come" as in approach you, not in the way I was thinking. The way I was thinking of was, admittingly, way weirder, but also more impressive.
OK so I wasn't the only one XD
Yeah i thought that to
Love Spit Take. I will say that O'Brien seems like the type of guy that has never said anything without a snarky/sarcastic tone to his voice. Must be why we love'em!
I truly dislike the spit take. I tried to be reasonable but I just don't like a watching/listening to a guy that looks and sounds dead inside. Give me some new guy over this garbage.
modetallah
Alright. This fuckwit is done being reasonable, Cracked. It's time to cancel The Spit Take. In fact, cancel everything. It's the only way to be sure. I have a FAMILY, dammit.
Flun Dinger Incredible, you go from zero to butthurt a lot in life, don't ya?
modetallah
See, Cracked? Look at how hard this shitstain is trying to be reasonable. Please, Cracked, cancel it, before it's too late!
Flun Dinger Your name is like my name.
Did you not watch Grease?
It was pretty clear what things go together.
Bama-lama-lama gadinky gading-danong
Plague Doctor shoobop-shoo-wadawada-yippity-boom-de-boom
Britt McV Never gonna give you up?
Andrew Taulane
Mom's spaghetti
Andrew Taulane
sigh.... never gonna let you down.... i dont even know you and i already hate you so much.
If you recently said to yourself, “The only thing that could make this day tolerable is a guy doing magic tricks while engulfed in flames,” well, you’re in luck! In fact, this whole video will make it alllll better. #itsavideomfers
Weird topic, but still awesome. Though every time a new Spit Take episode comes out, I wonder why you've stopped playing kickass music when you've not showing the clips.
I second that notion!!!
Glen Berkel *motion. It still makes grammatical sense, but it's motions that we second.
saltypork101 *fart noise*
saltypork101 what?
I'm guessing it's either copyright reasons or because it was distracting.
even when the guy is on fire, I still find card tricks boring as shit.
Wow. Bears really do take to hammocks.
I kinda feel like that should've been number one.
Simon Pegg and Nick Frost?
The only other one i could think of was plain doritos with basically any pancake topping, especially syrup or chocolate.
Frost Bite hey you’re the one who made me have to pick this name instead of Frost Bite i knew I’d find you
Someone please send me a link to that man-horse yoga I can't breathe
ruclips.net/video/h8CA6fUG9Do/видео.html
Although, there are also dozens of others just like it
last time I tried to throw a baboon, it ripped my face off, handed me back my eyes, and made me watch it eat my face like raw pizza dough. We've been happily married for 28 years now. It's a good story at parties because it explains my horrible disfigurement and how we met at the same time which leaves me more time to drink myself into a quasi pain-free stupor and ignore the nagging voice in the back of my head that says I'm trapped in a living hell. Anyhoo, better go. It doesn't like me looking at computers.
***** you win.
Sitting here thinking, "This video is dumb. It isn't going anywhere. Why are . . . HAMMOCK BEAR!"
Andy Serkis and MoCap
Best comment!
prescription medications and alcohol
If Ray William Johnson won't do his shit right, then the universe answers with cracked doing it justice
Hold on, "Indian giver" isn't offensive. It's because the Europeans were always taking back land they "gave" to the natives. "sure, we'll give you all the land west of this river, forever" 15 years later "actually, we changed our minds, you gotta move 200 more miles west."
can we change it to european giver then? Us Indians seem to be carrying the weight of that one.
qwertzy121212 Actually most sources believe it stemmed from misunderstanding between Lewis and Clark and the Native Americans. Allegedly the Native Americans would share their stuff with the explorers but in their culture it was customary to repay a gift in kind and so they became offended when the Europeans didn't repay them for their kindness and hospitality. Therefore, they wanted their gifts back.
Indian when u mean Native American is offensive enough
wait... i thought he was was the one that held all the memories of their people, and like was the only one who could see colors and had real emotions... sigh... i dont get it... i dont wanna watch the movie again.
J Jones If you insist, that's still what we call ourselves though. So unless you mean that it's offensive to people who are actually from India, i don't see it.
Horse Yoga and stretches are actually proven to help increase mobility in horses, reduce chances of arthritis and help cut down on vet and ferrier bills. Most barns do some form of horse yoga or stretching these days :D the horses love it too
well im now going to be using the phrase "you go together like patrick stewart and ian mckellen"
That's it I'm jazzercising with a crocodile
the number 3 is a technique for make the horse more friendly. were invented for the aborigen of argentina. also the part in spanish SAY IT. just put a damn subtitle and will get it.
+Alejandro Rodolfo Mendez Thank you, I came here to say the same thing. It's not yoga, it's much more awesome than that!
***** i agree. i guess that is what they understood by seeing it.
Chess-boxing. It's a real thing. Check it out
I couldn't pay attention to the video. He opens and closes his hands too much.
03:02 That ain't a cowboy m8, that's a Native from South-america, a Pampa Indian from Argentina.
Maybe related to the Argentinian cowboys though, the Gauchos.
The stuntman, Steve Truglia, died Nov. 17, 2016. He was 54. Requiescat in pace.
Goes together like crispy bacon and sliced tomato. Goes together like flannel sheets and a onesie! Goes together like a high speed chase and a traffic report helicopter! Ok, I'm done.
Sweet concept, props to the writer for this episode
I didnt know gypped was an insult to gypsies. Now I feel bad; I gotta stop using it now.
Pfffbt, I won't.
undetestable1 Don't let your experience here Jew you of a perfectly good word. I would suggest that you get a good Irish on then go to a ballgame; perhaps a Braves or an Indian game. While you're there you can call the ump a dirt blinded greasy Wop; then hopefully it won't matter as much anymore.
lol Atleast to of the race based insults you used apply to me or member of my family. How else am I supposed to get mad at people for using them if I keep saying Gyp. I feed off righteous indignation!
Literally none of those things are "the World's Coolest Things".
Making people feel bad about themselves is what the internet was made for
Comments on video are better than the video. Haven't seen that before.
Someone needs to tell cracked that saying lots of random things in quick succession does not equal funny.
Oh, is that why the dislikes are so much higher than the likes here?
I find it quite funny, sir.
These africans got real life pokemon lmfaoo
Until I was six I didn't know there were any other vegetables.
Peas and carrots go together like... well, like peas and carrots.
Potatoes and steak
No one show Cody this video.
"How have we not made a movie about this guy showing up in the old west where everyone was impressed if you could get a horse to come by whistling at it?"
Wait, WHAT? Oh THAT kind of come. Lol.
Peas and carrots, diced, go well together. Peanut butter doesn't go well with everything: try using peanut butter instead of refried beans in Texican foods like burritos and stuff from Taco Bell.
6:10 Hey! A clip from Party Down South! I worked on that show as a Production assistant
DAMN those people were stupid...
Bears + hammocks, supa cool 👍🖖🖕
But how about rap + tuva???
Missed one, fellows.
people : "awww animals are so cuteeee look at them omg!!!"
people: * ignore and laugh at how animals are being hurt / exploited *
people: "I FUCKING LOVE ANIMALS SO MUCH"
Mah.
I can't BELIEVE you didn't include Sirs Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart. What assholes for not even mentioning them...
When you said "Where everyone was impressed if you could get a horse to come by whistling at it" I was terrified of the next scene and then embarrassed by my misinterpretation of that sentence.
'Cracked' video + Hershey product placement = $$$. Now that's a magical combination.
Edit: By the way, please don't say 'competish'. It just sounds stupid.
Mmm peanut butter and marshmallows.thanks crack!!! I mean cracked!!!!
That bear has me beat. I’m a grown-arse Woman who flipped over trying to get into a hammock, hit the brick wall behind it, fell to the concrete below & bruised a bone in my foot on the metal frame. I’m not allowed to use it if I’m home alone because it took me a while before I could move & my family is worried I’ll die before I can call for help next time. Not allowed to use ladders either unless they’re actually listening to me describe what I’m doing while my phone’s on speaker somewhere nearby but safe from falling... me, so they can cal 000 (Australian). On the other hand I AM on all the drugs. Just all of them.
I know they do dog yoga & “doga” (2 different things) & I’m genuinely impressed by this amazing display. If you REALLY want to impress me, show me yoga with cats, 1 at a time sure but more than 1 cat (every species has an idiot cousin).
Jack *~sigh~* if you don’t already feel bad about yourself, then clearly you lack the capacity & I’d just be wasting my time
When I was watching #3, I was hoping he would show a scene from 'The Lone Ranger'. My dad loves that movie so he shows it to me a lot and I've enjoyed it more than I originally expected. Regardless, I think it would've been a PERFECT example for the third one they showed. Albeit, I didn't know of the example they did show during #3; but I digress.
Cigarette smoking goats
Beal St, Memphis
Jessica of Hollywood
Disneyland in the 90's
Pizza Hut, Burger King and or Taco Bell stores. Can't be beat.
Mire frequent The Spit Take videos! Theyre the best. And btw you once had a video, where (among other things) a guy was trapped on a balcony of a burning building.
It was filmed from across the street by some woman.
Cant find it anywhere..
Holy shit. There is a porno shot in that same hammock. I am sad I know it, but also sad the bear didn't show up during.
And that was Miss Ohio?! Dammit. Ohio is doomed. Everyone get out.
Fun Fact:
Andre The Giant was notorious for never being "shitfaced". He could drink kegs and only feel slightly dizzy. The worst he got was after a night of heavy drinking (as wrestlers did back then) he complained of not feeling so good, threw up on an oncoming taxi, said he felt better, and went back inside for more drinks.
Resorting to making non-witty observations on random pairs of things in an "America's Funniest Home Videos" fashion? You guys just.. you make me openly exasperated sometimes.
annnnd stopped watching one minute in
yeah that intro was boring as shit but the rest of it's alright. I almost had to close out too.
I'm laughing so hard I owe you money! Damn I needed a good laugh! I had to pause this video several times just to laugh and come back and watch again! 😂 Thank you so very much for this post!
horses aren't supposed to be layed on their backs it can seriously damage their spine
These... are all so damned beautiful! =D
This video was underwhelming. Seemed like a poorly-written version of someone saying "hey, how can we get away with showing a list of cute videos without being to =3 about it?"
World's most dangerous card trick? Being on fire while doing card tricks does not make the card tricks dangerous because the fire isn't part of the card trick. The fire is what is threatening to destroy your body in your sad/desperate plea for attention; and the ones with the camera are thinking "I can get money for filming this idiot," instead of "wow, what a cool trick."
That's not "cowboy yoga", that's an Argentinian taming a horse in a regionally traditional, non agressive way. He makes the horse feel relaxed and earns his trust. No cowboys, no yoga.
Im sorry what? I wasn't listening Jack..all these clips were distracting me...like all of them
Goes together like Game of Thrones and awesomeness.
*****
god damn it sara! if i've told you once i've told you a thousand times, stop giving people the internet! they seldom deserve it from you
SnuggleStruggle
Awww. I was hoping someone would make up another one, and it would just keep going from there. Just be thankful I didn't go with "Goes together like Game of Thrones and porn". Because that makes about the same amount of sense and you know it.
But, in the hope that someone does continue this little 'goes together like.....' contest, here's my next entry to get the ball rolling, so to speak;
"Goes together like Bacon and Maple Syrup."
Goes together like Game of thrones and people who can´t stop talking about Game of thrones.
Niklas Hansen Nice. On the same vein - Goes together like 'Breaking Bad' and people who like 'The Wire'.
goes together like breaking bad and selling my tv for meth. no really i watched breaking bad and just had to do meth. dont regret it. never will
Yeah...that wasn't horse yoga we just watched... that was horse molestation...
This was a somewhat clever way to 'make a category' to just show off some videos everyone's seen before. I mean, the title was actually honest, at least. Maybe this editing prowess should have been used on the "Heroes that would be Villains today" video.
To capture a wild pig with a monkey, you must first capture the wild monkey, then train it to not only ride the pig, but to love it enough to come back for another go, again and again, so you're not trading every monkey in for a single pig. Truly wild in every sense of the word.
I'm glad I didn't call first before watching the video. This was hilarious.
yea ik this is an old episode, but i'm pretty sure they trained the baboons to attack and ride the boars in order to wear them down so the humans could rally them up and kill them for food... maybe not the first thing i'd think of, but hey, gotta work with what ya got. and apparently they had baboons laying around XD
I could listen to Jack talk for hours about dumb shit like this... something about his voice..
peanut butter. chocolate. great when separate. but when they combine they make your morning time epic.
...you usually have to go to very scary places on the internet to find such intimate horse-on-man action...places that even the nsa wouldn't record just in case your very online history has a new strain of std...
new guy weekly and demoralizing RUclips comments
Is the new zombie Col Sanders a creepier fast food mascot than Big Head Burger King?
THIS WAS THE MOST FANTASTIC VIDEO IVE EVER HAD THE PLEASURE OF WATCHING. I MAY NOW DIE IN PEACE. THANK YOU, CRACKED.COM, THANK YOU.
5:10 you clearly haven't seen jeff Dunham 😂
I don't know what language was on the horse video, but I heard the word SATIVA!
Chocolate and Ginger Ale is a terrible combination! One of the only things chocolate does NOT go well with!
That yoga guy is absolutely fucking that horse. I will stake my credibility on it.
It can kill a horse to have no weight on its hooves for too long. They're built to have that wait on their hooves all the time, and I can't imagine the horse was happy or comfortable with the situation. It was probably staying still has a fear response.
Toddler shaped dog 😆 scattered without mace 😅
General interest: phrases that go together like that (bread + butter, bear + hammock) are called collocations.
the peas and carrots line comes from older school lunches. when every time you got veggies it was peas and carrots.
90's grunge and handguns....
Wait, did I cross a line there?
trollololol
"The question is not whether he going too fuck that horse but why I'm so ok with it"
I laughed so hard that I died right there, he also has point.
Wait, at 5:10, did you notice Miss America Ventriloquist is lip syncing that song?
Peanutbutter is disgusting and shouldn't be touched with a 10 foot stick let alone eaten
Fact: This is the first video I've ever seen that Jack O'Brien did not wear the same hooded jacket.
Jack, why are you one of those people who pronounces Reese as "Reesee." Gah. You're better than this.
Why do so many people say Reesies Piecies? You know, instead of the way it's written: Reese's Pieces.
it's not pronounced Re-See, it's a guy's last name showing possession.
Where did Jack O'Brien's music taste go? Bring it back!
"Never know what might, Happen..." I lost it.
So the beauty pageant contestant was trying to argue for sexism against women and the way they are portrayed. That makes total sense.
"and manuel stretched silver in ways she had never been stretched and their love was beautiful"
That ventriloquist actually has talent holy shit.
I think the fake smile is the way she manage to not move her lips.
you guys might get more views if your videos weren't named like spam
3:30 I guess they haven't heard of the documentary Zoo. And that guy in this vid also has a stud farm.
that white guy with the dreads is my friend Justin Hausman. my friends is now famous!
i didn't like how the Spanish narrator said any of that it was one of the worst things ive ever heard my whole life of hearing Spanish
The only reason this guy still has a show is because he is the editor-in-chief. There can be no other explanation.
I feel like tosh took a bite from these trend setters from CRACKED