Jim Haggerty Porks The USA! -- Porkin' Across America -- Ep. 1
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- Опубликовано: 10 окт 2012
- Today Now! host Jim Haggerty is starting his cross country pork-eating tour in the great state of Kentucky. Jim's in the kitchen of the Country Smokestack learning all the secrets into what goes into good pork-- that is, if his wife stops callings him about massive amounts of water pouring from a pipe in their condo!
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Jim nails the annoying morning show host role perfectly.
porkfectly
@@ploopybear oh god
This guy is great in everything he plays.
What do you mean, this video was funny and wholesome, Jim even left a tip at the end
Jim is wholesome, never annoying
Wow. You can really taste the cooked pork.
I like the chili. You can really taste the powder too.
That was my absolute favorite line
I'm a big salt fan
You can really taste the powder too
Salt, that’s right oughta my cookbook
I love how you can hear the lapping water whenever his wife is on the phone
Nathan oh god they alud later on with the poor dog
One of The Onion's underrated gems. It's kinda like a deeply dysfunctional Food Network show (or probably how people on those shows act once the cameras are off).
Have you even watched Sex House?
Stout Shako “I think the fact that the producers put only one gay man in the sex house is a huge oversight”
Watch the rest of the show
If I were the host of a Food Network show I'd just be straight-up and honest constantly, no cuts or edits. In fact, I don't believe in cutting or editing anything other than maybe taking a shit or a shower.
I adore how he knows nothing about pork.
Lol
Oh hey Bob! I never knew you watched The Onion...
I myself am a huge porkhead, and I think Jim is caught up in the current pork lingo
Bigfootin across america
Or food in general - salt and what?
This is so well made.
It fits every single convention of these food shows, down to the royalty free non specific country music, the shots of the restaurant, the fonts, everything.
Some guy stuffing his face with food while he blathers on about nonsense
The horrible host who knows nothing lmao
Does everyone realize this is one of mankind's greatest achievements in comedy ever ever?
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS
It really is. There are so many god-damned layers to every interaction and joke. It's part critique, part satire, part descent into the self-destruction that every man, on some level, secretly fears. It's the descent of a man who neglected everything but his career, throwing money at every problem and never being emotionally invested enough in his family to keep it from falling apart. And how he becomes the thing he's desperately trying to pursue in the hopes that if this one more TV show is successful, he'll finally have enough money to buy his family's problems away. And it consumes him, turns him into a subhuman animal, and utterly destroys him and everyone who tried to love him. And yet somehow, we manage to laugh at it. It's perfection.
Horror
This spoof is hilarious and I come back to it every few years.
@@johneden2033 it's also about how a terrible useless wife helps add to his descent into what will become loneliness and madness.
This series gets so dark so fast
the message is that SWINE (PORK) is filthy and a detestable thing to ingest. Pig meat is the closest you can get to CANNIBALISM, a pig's organs can replace human organs and successful transplants are not impossible. Pigs are very intelligent although they are dirty as shit sometimes. The epitome of decadence is the consumption of pig flesh. All meat eating is sadistic on some level believe it or not, this is why we pretend to be eating the brand instead of a living breathing miracle of creation i.e its not A COW its BEEF, its not A CHICKEN its CHICKEN(the brand), its not A PIG its PORK and fish don't have nerve cells (lol) so its ok to slay them and then devour their cadavers.
No, the only filthy and disgusting thing here is your comment.
Other people:
Watching their favorite TV shows
"This is life"
Me:
Sneaking into the woods, murdering an animal, chopping up its body and eating it for the rest of the year
"This is life"
BLEEP BLOOP how far you wanna scale back dip shit
Seriously...
Why hasn’t this actor been in ANYTHING else? He’s brilliant.
S K look up onion today now
he was in the manchurian candidate as a news anchor
Oliver North lmao they mean apart from the onion
recognized him in an old episode of law and order: SVU and could only see him as Jim, the pig man
Look up Brad Holbrook. The guy used to be a serious news anchor in the 80s, and now runs an acting studio.
This was his masterpiece.
I love the foreshadowing by deb calling jim a “stupid pig” hehhehehe
Pork man speaking
"First we put a little salt and pepper"
"You put a little what??"
"..... Salt and pepper"
"Salt! That's right outta my cookbook!"
This joke was so underrated
AlphaSeagull white people
@@LiakkDoesStuff I know right? (Says I, a white person)
AlphaSeagull I also know right? (Says a fellow white person)
@@LiakkDoesStuff what? (Says I an Asian )
I'm a big salt fan !
I love Michael Moses' face every time Jim does something a little weird. Like "something's off here, but I can't put my finger on it."
haha! that's why this one is my favorite episode. "You can really taste the powder too"
To me, Mr. Moses' face looks more like, "This guy is off his rocker."
That awkward face when Jim is outside yelling on the phone is so perfect
I seriously can't tell if Moses is scripted or not. He did a great job
This actor doesn't get enough credit.
Still doesn’t unfortunately.
Everyone in the early Onion
'Oh, I like the chilli. You can definitely taste the powder, too' got me laughing harder than it should
"Lexington, Kentucky"
*shows pictures of Louisville*
Even better, Illinois restaurant.
Lmao
@@chrisp1601 they were too lazy to leave so they recorded everything in Illinois lol
@@janko7245 it's not reasonable to expect them to actually go across the US just for these skits lol theyre on a budget
He is an incredible actor. I can't imagine his real personality.
Yeah that's the point
He's like Daniel day Lewis
I keep coming back to that last line
“I’ll see you in pork”
It’s so cryptic, yet so simple
What does it mean
Watch the rest of the series, and you will understand...
What about his wife with the foreshadowing calling him ‘pig’
@@theoneonly8472 yeah at 4:53
“Times like these make me thankful I’m not an observant Jew” is one of the lines of all time
Quite possibly the best modern-day retelling of Kafka's The Metamorphosis to ever be told.
“Pork Man speaking!” is how every phonecall should be answered.
This is quietly the funniest series on RUclips
This is seriously underrated.
@Super Smash Flash 2 Beta Complete Soundtrack i dont think thats giorno
Ikr
Best description of the midwest ever, "you can tell, just by looking at them, that they love pork"
I don't know where you come from, but Kentucky is definitely NOT the Midwest.
This is the kind of lighthearted kitchen show I need to unwind after a long day working.
oh boy...
So how'd it go?
@@iamdumbsometimes483 that nose...
That fucking pig nose!
Oh boy...
Nothing is more important than family
THE DESCENT OF JIMS MADNESS BEGINS
“I like the chili, you can definitely taste the powder too..”
i burst out laughing xD
8 episodes later...
I stared at the void and it stared right back.
The foreshadowing is so good in this series. With his sloppy eating, his wife calling him a pig, and his careless spending of money. So underrated.
there's nothing more important than family
"Oh I like the Chili, you can definitely taste the powder too"
"You know before you cooked the meat it was cold and red"
Jim Haggerty is awwwwesome!
The wife is an adult with a phone so y doesn't she just call a repair man?
His wife is a bitch as it turns out
+werty.709 this is the person who thought marrying and having kids with Jim was a good idea
his wife is incompetent. she probably died after divorcing him in episode 2
She isn't allowed to see any other men. She might get porked.
sheela but he loves pork
"Oh, I thought the bully died" is so beautifully written and executed, the guy is the best.
Love the way he tips the owner like one hundred dollars and the waiter is like, "Wait... our food doesn't cost that much!"
I agree with Jim. Why can't the wife call the plummer her self?
Gladly, Deb is loyal. You know what happens if she calls the plumber ;)
Cause she's a woman.
And then a good divorce lawyer... yeah
@@hh7184 what ? So far Jim hasn't done anything that's *that* wrong
@@maxfelson9467 or that right... 🦠
Moses really fills the wisened, understanding, expert smoker/cook role that anyone would want to have lunch with.
If you're eating pork while watching this for the first time, I advise you to stop immediately.
The Porkin Across America series is probably the most underrated Onion content. So absurd and brilliant.
This and Sex House are both so much funnier the second time around.
Agreed!
Lake Dredge Appraisal too🙂
Dr. Good is great too.
Or the eleventh time
"COUNTRY SMOKESTACK" in Kentucky my ass, I knew I recognized the inside of this place. Russell's Ribs in Chicago!
OK I want to visit that then and since I've always wanted to try deep dish pizza in Chicago I now have two places to go :D
FatElvis makes sense. Onion is headquartered in Chicago
FatElvis - It’s Country Smokestack in Kentucky. “Russell’s Ribs In Chicago” is a figment of your delusional imagination.
Lol no its In Louisville the onion called it Lexington
Do they really have that meat that starts out cold and red?
"Pork man" is foreshadowing.
Had to watch the entire series to understand that....
He said Lexington, but showed Louisville. LOL
Kentucky gang
I noticed the same thing. Perfect for the onion.
The bizarre uses of the word "pork" add to the surreality of this series so nicely.
4:53 I feel like this is the best foreshadowing ever
To be fair he isn't a goddamn plumber, he realistically cannot help his wife in this scenario
Idk help with the kids or deal with the angry neighbors
"I like chili!, you can definitely taste the powder too!"
I cried for at least 5 minutes
Ik this is the Onion and all but i'm furious that the wife didn't just call a plummer. WHY did she let the water flood. I'm actually screeching
Bitches amirite
@@CharlesNauck "I know she is a she"
Yikes.
@@CharlesNauck well I'm a man and crap at fixing stuff so me and my wife would both sit in a flooded house wondering what to do.
@@CharlesNauck Yeah my problem is I don't have a phone because it broke when it fell into the water when the house flooded. I'm also retarded and my wife doesn't exist and there was never a flood I made it all up to get likes. Whoops.
Also this series gets really weird and dark. It's well done but the ending is unexpected and sad. Kind of stops being funny, just intensely mesmerizing and depressing.
@@harorider96 Both of my comments were not really serious.
Hey our food dont cost this much.
Langus langus what a good and honest man
Don't worry. I got cash!
Just finished the whole series. Bravo Onion this is a piece of art. Horrifying art...
I just made myself a nice meal and am ready to watch this wholesome series.
Boy oh boy
You probably vomited the meal after seeing this or an actual program.
You know, the first two times I watched this I felt really bad for his wife and kids. This third time through though, maybe it's the pork getting to me, but come on, how is this lady so helpless she can't call a plumber?
I thought the same thing too! Like yes, the host is being unnecessarily callous and terrible to his wife and kids in such a dire situation, but come on, he has proved to be unreliable before and when a pipe bursts to the level that it floods your apartment, you most definitely call a plumber.
They establish on the phone call that he's been a dead-beat father and trash husband for many years. Ignoring this new issue to selfishly pursue an idiotic career move is just the last straw
@@mockduckcompanion He thought the bully died I dunno what you want from him.
@@mockduckcompanion doesn't change the wife is somehow physically incapable of calling a plumber and instead let's all her possessions be drowned in trash water
"Most of meat is muscle"
Jim: how dare you humiliate me on my own show, swine-slayer.
"Meat sure changes a lot in the cooking process doesn't it?" 😂
1:35 those buildings and bridges are in Louisville, not Lexington. I can't believe such an esteemed news organization as The Onion would be so careless as to produce this inaccuracy. "America's Finest News Source"? Ha!
powerpenguin 87 That was actually them driving through Louisville, turning around and going directly to Lexington via teleportation. It’s not an error, but a display of power.
“Fresh local beef”
Who else sides with him.
He ain't a plumber, he told her to call one. Instead she wanted him there to blame.
Man should have just called a plumber himself from the road if she was that helpless lol
"I like the chili, you can definitely taste the powder too.", that joke is so much Dad that it became funny again :).
I mean… Deb couldn’t call a plumber?! Really?
4:53 - "I never want to see you again, you stupid pig!"
lol, nice foreshadowing
5:48 I love that dude😂
3:25 I was not ready for that 😂
Man, Jim Haggerty's got that blank, empty stare that one only gets when you do cable news for too long! It's like you can see the soul at the edges of his eyes.
Whoever is playijg Jim is an amazing actor. If you ignore the phone calls and hospital visits this really does feel like a shitty tv show.
I'd laugh if you said this episode was the high point of Jim's life.
Why would anyone...bottle...a banana
@fasha77 I still find that pic disturbing
Weird thing is that it isn't he's much more happy and content where he ended up.
After this, Today Now is never the same again for me
This guy playing the restaurant owner plays such a good "not in on it" role
4:52 foreshadowing
i woke up in a sweat because i remembered that this series exists. haunting stuff, brilliant acting.
Make sure to finish this series! It's a wild ride, and an amazing performance by Brad Holbrook (Jim Haggerty).
This series is probably one of the best dark comedies I've seen.
Can we just take a moment to appreciate what a masterpiece this whole thing was?
He hands put slightly less money every episode until he hands out $3 and they dont really call attention to it. This is truly a masterpiece
The acting is so good,You forget it’s acting
He could've solved the problem by bringing his family on the road trip and making it heartwarming!! He just needs a good marketing team
This is SO, SOOOOOOO UNDERRATED, It must have millions of views, this is comedy gold!!!!
"My food don't cost this much" that part really got me
What a gem this series is. And it only works in this format. No previews, taken only on its own terms.
Seeing this 7 years after, and it is still funny. He and so hot Tracy also did the best news program.
The total show is about an hour. It’s crazy how great this actually is in that amount of time. It’s super cringey and dark humor but I absolutely love it! I wish they did seasons of this lol
“If you’re still hungry you can try some strawberry pie”
“No no, that’s okay. I can only eat pork.”
*gives multiple 20’s for a burger and fries”
“Hey. Hey, our food doesn’t cost this much!”
LMAO had me rolling
Jim ALMOST cracked a laugh at 5:36 lmao
Huge props to hanging onto the "Existential Life crisis, but the show must go on" moment
This thing is criminally underrated.
What an incompetent wife. Not smart to leave someone like that alone 😂
Who would ask their husband to leave a paying job, to do volunteering... which does not pay.
"There's a burst pipe. Help!"
"OK, call a plumber, then."
"No, I need help" lmao
Something something Breadtube something something Scaredy Cats
Man left his family hanging for us ❤️
“I like the chili, you can taste the powder too”
😂😆
lmfaoooo he's so adorable i love his vids on the onion !
threeVs17 I bet you enjoyed the rest of the series if you think he was adorable at the start
@@luging2051 💀💀💀
This whole series is a masterpiece. Can’t wait to watch it ail again!
the chef seemed genuinely nice
Had no idea this was real!!
I wonder if all those other ads where real too...
I'm seeing a lot of tells here that reveal stuff later in the series but in a subtle manner. This writing is excellent.
Fun fact: Brad Holbrook, the actor who plays Jim, is from Kentucky (specifically, Lexington).
About to rewatch this masterpiece
God i miss this BRING IT BACK
I thought Sex House and Porkin' Across America were just fake show trailers put in the end to make the other ones seem more real, turns out they're real too lol
Why would you just keep calling your husband instead of a plumber?
Eight years later and we can confidently say that this beats Game of Thrones by a mile.
3:18 "Nice sturdy pipes...." lmao
I can only eat pork
They are going to make 50 episodes of this. 50 episodes.
Favourite thing the onion has ever done.
People watching this for the first time: 😊😂
People who watched all 8 episodes: 💀