In The Know: Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized?

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  • Опубликовано: 5 окт 2024
  • Subscribe to The Onion on RUclips: bit.ly/xzrBUA
    Panelists discuss whether Halloween candy and costumes have distracted us from placating demons to ensure a bountiful harvest.
    Like The Onion on Facebook: www. theo...
    Follow The Onion on Twitter: / theonion
    More Breaking News: www.theonion.co...

Комментарии • 1,7 тыс.

  • @cromanticheer
    @cromanticheer 5 лет назад +5934

    I love how Duncan is the author of a new book (that happens to be relevant to the current topic) each time.

    • @joshs.5384
      @joshs.5384 4 года назад +280

      I've never noticed that! God, the Onion packs so much genius into each video.

    • @pvshka
      @pvshka 4 года назад +101

      I love small recurring jokes like that.

    • @LeoStaley
      @LeoStaley 4 года назад +44

      Oh God, I've never noticed. How do I go back and watch all these? RUclips's search is shit

    • @zejdland
      @zejdland 3 года назад +2

      ruclips.net/video/uU4q415Rkb0/видео.html mhm is math science?

    • @RoroRoseD
      @RoroRoseD 3 года назад +17

      I love that they stick to their lores and connect small details each clips 😂

  • @BobGymlan
    @BobGymlan 3 года назад +2642

    Most people don’t even carry amulets anymore. I realize they’re cumbersome and the permits are expensive, but it’s better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it.

    • @starcrafter13terran
      @starcrafter13terran 3 года назад +36

      That's why we invented lanyards.

    • @robynalice879
      @robynalice879 3 года назад +4

      Hmm? Permits? I'm curious as to what you mean

    • @schattentaenzerin
      @schattentaenzerin 3 года назад +63

      Isn't there an amendment that gives you the right to bear amulets? 🤔

    • @HettesKvek
      @HettesKvek 2 года назад +46

      Recent innovations in alchemy and enchantments have made most amulets light weight to carry, so there really isn't any reason not to carry them to ward off the demons that seek to devour our souls on the daily basis.

    • @ElDuderinoh
      @ElDuderinoh 2 года назад +3

      @@robynalice879 did you even pay attention?!

  • @petesmith9475
    @petesmith9475 5 лет назад +1321

    Poor Duncan lost this debate big time.

    • @Noarcs
      @Noarcs 5 лет назад +57

      Post office box!

    • @TheMamaluigi300
      @TheMamaluigi300 4 года назад +10

      Fantastic Mister
      Duncan: *rockets out of Hell*

    • @zejdland
      @zejdland 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/uU4q415Rkb0/видео.html mhm is math science?

    • @JN-ug5ky
      @JN-ug5ky 5 месяцев назад +1

      ​@@Noarcs The good ol' PO box

  • @kellyzing9951
    @kellyzing9951 Год назад +1471

    “Has America lost sight of the true meaning of Halloween?”
    15 years later and they still bring me to tears. Why is the Onion not a regular show? They blow SNL out of the water. We NEED them now more than ever.

    • @mykeljmoney
      @mykeljmoney Год назад +96

      My understanding is they cut all this amazing stuff when they were sold to Univision. Big corporations ruining something else

    • @GSBarlev
      @GSBarlev Год назад +16

      They had one for, I think, two seasons on IFC. It was brilliant.

    • @alphabetsoup6681
      @alphabetsoup6681 Год назад +26

      After 2016, reality took a turn and they couldn't compete.

    • @uis8174
      @uis8174 Год назад

      Ain’t that deep bruh

    • @woody5476
      @woody5476 11 месяцев назад +6

      @@mykeljmoneyThey're definitely not what they used to be.

  • @abduljah9355
    @abduljah9355 5 лет назад +2578

    It was pretty irresponsible to speak impiously of Algol.

    • @Cjnw
      @Cjnw 4 года назад +20

      Or RUclips's recommend Algol Rythym !!

    • @dragonsforbreakfast3572
      @dragonsforbreakfast3572 4 года назад +29

      I thought they said Al-ghoul.

    • @landochabod7
      @landochabod7 4 года назад +9

      @@dragonsforbreakfast3572 I think that's the etymology of Algol...

    • @dragonsforbreakfast3572
      @dragonsforbreakfast3572 4 года назад +5

      @@landochabod7 Ah, cool. It's Arabic apparently.

    • @landochabod7
      @landochabod7 4 года назад +17

      @@dragonsforbreakfast3572 Yup. Algol is an eclipsing binary star: its light changes in time, which is probably why it had creepy names in many cultures.

  • @copperandbrick
    @copperandbrick 16 лет назад +3811

    "I do NOT want a spate of stillborn births!"
    "Duncan, be quiet! Think about our wells!"
    Oh, these people are good.

    • @rajsouth101
      @rajsouth101 4 месяца назад +14

      No reply to yours 15 year old comment,so I just dropped 1 here 🙂😊

    • @blissfuldj7627
      @blissfuldj7627 4 месяца назад +7

      ​@@rajsouth101 raj, theyre dead

    • @rajsouth101
      @rajsouth101 4 месяца назад +3

      @@blissfuldj7627 no,she just commented on another video of this same channel just 5 months ago..

    • @blissfuldj7627
      @blissfuldj7627 4 месяца назад +7

      @@rajsouth101 raj, thats a clone, the real one is gone

    • @rajsouth101
      @rajsouth101 4 месяца назад

      @@blissfuldj7627 bro,if u click on the circle ⭕ icon beside the username in the above comment it shows the previous comments one has made in the current channel. When I did it for the @copperandbrick it showed a comment made from this account 5 months ago..

  • @osibald2342
    @osibald2342 5 лет назад +8433

    Their acting feels real. Like, they arent acting or thinking about their lines but like this is happening for real

    • @tomlxyz
      @tomlxyz 4 года назад +600

      You say it like this isn't legit news

    • @enbybunny9940
      @enbybunny9940 4 года назад +108

      The power of the onion

    • @sebastian-benedictflore
      @sebastian-benedictflore 4 года назад +354

      I think that's what acting is.

    • @elijahmendez4107
      @elijahmendez4107 4 года назад +27

      Well they are probably from hollywood, this is real news in the belly of the beast

    • @aidinwitiak1630
      @aidinwitiak1630 4 года назад +35

      Could be improv

  • @evanracer9
    @evanracer9 4 года назад +3645

    I like believing that this is a real news agency in an alternate universe

    • @matthew8153
      @matthew8153 4 года назад +65

      Negative Ramos
      Much of the stuff they’ve said has come to pass in this realm.

    • @Tjalve70
      @Tjalve70 4 года назад +34

      What do you mean "alternate universe"?

    • @Sawdustinthemakeup
      @Sawdustinthemakeup 4 года назад +38

      W-w wait, you're telling me the onion isn't a really news source?

    • @Tjalve70
      @Tjalve70 4 года назад +58

      @@Sawdustinthemakeup Relax. The Onion IS a real news source.
      They just have a slightly different approach to reality than most other news sources.

    • @Sawdustinthemakeup
      @Sawdustinthemakeup 4 года назад +8

      @@Tjalve70 oh thank God! For a second I was starting to think the onion isn't a really news source. Like imagine how crazy that would be finding out that the onion isn't real news!

  • @KZ-hu9uj
    @KZ-hu9uj 5 лет назад +1044

    The moment Duncan went all in on his skepticism, I knew he was done for

    • @coalkingryan881
      @coalkingryan881 Год назад +25

      Such is the folly of man

    • @jkta97
      @jkta97 6 месяцев назад

      Just like that other guy who talked crap about the robot overlords.

  • @MoonShadowWolfe
    @MoonShadowWolfe 8 лет назад +5582

    Hey, I'm starting to suspect that ... there _is_ no Clifford Banes ...

    • @romantistcaveman
      @romantistcaveman 8 лет назад +633

      Do not blaspheme! DO NOT BLASPHEME!

    • @awdrifter3394
      @awdrifter3394 7 лет назад +684

      He exists. He hosted 1 episode wearing a Juliana McKennis mask.

    • @stanislausklim7794
      @stanislausklim7794 6 лет назад +85

      awdrifter3 I think that was the one where they're debating whether to allow kids to see r-rated movies where there masturbate

    • @---nobody---
      @---nobody--- 6 лет назад +12

      I like your profile picture(:

    • @Myne1001
      @Myne1001 6 лет назад +23

      He does actually appear in one video. Forgot which one.

  • @stephfahey1101
    @stephfahey1101 9 лет назад +13145

    "42% of americans can't find earth on globe"

    • @damobeck1
      @damobeck1 9 лет назад +718

      When did Onion stop being satirical?

    • @cablecrusher26
      @cablecrusher26 8 лет назад +204

      +David Mobeck This is satire?

    • @stephfahey1101
      @stephfahey1101 8 лет назад +140

      cablecrusher26 *facepalm*

    • @TheGoodContent37
      @TheGoodContent37 7 лет назад +169

      Now they think the earth is flat.

    • @TCt83067695
      @TCt83067695 6 лет назад +100

      Stephanie Fahey i'm really worried about the 58%

  • @boccs9925
    @boccs9925 10 лет назад +4514

    And for his eternal punishment Duncan was forced to become Google (if it was a guy)

    • @romantistcaveman
      @romantistcaveman 8 лет назад +209

      Truly a fate worse than death!

    • @---nobody---
      @---nobody--- 6 лет назад +166

      Hahaha😂 that was him in If Google Was A Guy! I knew I recognized him, he’s in s lot of stuff but I could recall specifically which thing I was trying to remember him being in

    • @Ondulado.
      @Ondulado. 4 года назад +16

      Most recently he was in try not to laugh news on ch

    • @MeesterTweester
      @MeesterTweester 4 года назад +18

      that just blew my mind

    • @choibtc6121
      @choibtc6121 4 года назад +12

      omg u r right. Now I know why he looked familiar for some reasons

  • @PMelol
    @PMelol 10 лет назад +3103

    This is actually genius.

    • @SH19922x
      @SH19922x 5 лет назад +48

      The old Onion was the diamond standard of comedy, what happened to them and comedy in general?!

    • @mikemike7326
      @mikemike7326 5 лет назад +5

      Jack of Blades theyre contents still like this i feel like 🤔

    • @RheeasDomain
      @RheeasDomain 5 лет назад +8

      Yeah, these guys should really start a satirical channel on yT!

    • @micahnewman
      @micahnewman 5 лет назад

      Actually

    • @matthew8153
      @matthew8153 5 лет назад +11

      S H
      Because now the truth is more ridiculous.

  • @dominateeye
    @dominateeye 4 года назад +724

    I think Duncan made some good points, and Algol reacted in a way totally obstructive to the conversation, not to mention unnecessary. ONN shouldn't invite him back, I don't care who he threatens to ghoulify.

    • @michealwilliams472
      @michealwilliams472 2 года назад +1

      It really is unfortunate that you can't conjure demonic entities and spirits anymore without things getting politicized. MSM has really ruined everything.

    • @kimgkomg
      @kimgkomg Год назад +24

      Yeah, he was totally out of line

    • @AppleOfThineEye
      @AppleOfThineEye Год назад

      Yeah. What a jerk.

    • @ysf-d9i
      @ysf-d9i Год назад +30

      people like you are the exact reason why algol needed to do what he did.

    • @mtrebtreboschi5722
      @mtrebtreboschi5722 11 месяцев назад +14

      I dont think its the onion's fault. Its just one of the side effects of a live performance, but I think the fact that Algol blew up on national tv like this is going to hurt his public image and effect whether people choose to keep working with him moving forward

  • @jzplayinggame
    @jzplayinggame 6 лет назад +723

    When they started singing I LOST IT

    • @PauliReinert
      @PauliReinert 3 месяца назад

      What did you lose?

    • @yaioru
      @yaioru 2 месяца назад +1

      his peanits 😢😢

  • @rogerrogers6753
    @rogerrogers6753 10 лет назад +595

    still one of my favorite onion pieces of all time. the amount of views is absurd, it should be 10x what it is.
    Brilliant!

    • @tugboat2030
      @tugboat2030 3 года назад +6

      This clip perfectly encapsulates what I thought in church. The pastors would decry Halloween for having fun and celebratory elements while also denouncing the fun and celebratory elements of Christmas. And I'm thinking, "What if Santa Claus brings more people to Jesus than it he wasn't a tradition?" Never got to ask that in church though.

  • @MrStevemur
    @MrStevemur Месяц назад +7

    Every year I dress up as Clifford Banes. No one ever guesses my costume.

  • @joeedangerously4295
    @joeedangerously4295 10 лет назад +2908

    My family used to sacrifice a goat on the altar every year to Asmodeus and the dark Lord Satan when I was a kid. These little brats now, though, they might, MIGHT ritualistically slaughter a cat or something and maybe recite an incantation but that's usually about it. Most of them don't even know the proper sacrificial procedures. They slit the throat first, yeah, but then they wing it. It's depressing how much the reason for the season has been lost. It's a war on Halloween.

    • @alexanderpataki5567
      @alexanderpataki5567 10 лет назад +191

      Even more sadly, at least in my area, is that the children here have moved almost entirely to firework-based methods of cat-slaughter, which clearly does nothing what-so-ever to appease Apharoohl, The Djinn of The Lost Ones.

    • @Sorakeyblademaster37
      @Sorakeyblademaster37 10 лет назад +98

      That's nothing. People in my neighborhood thought the Cwn Annwn and Dark Lord Arawn were some of kind Chinese dish!

    • @malamindulo
      @malamindulo 8 лет назад +125

      I talked to my 7 year old cousin yesterday, and she knew nothing! I thought my Aunt has taught her how to use Jelalji bone charms and Mandrake incense to keep Phi-Alderu, the god of pain, and his hounds of famine at bay from the burial ground. She couldn't even use Enneagram emblems to banish a Dybbuk.

    • @kennykeating5243
      @kennykeating5243 6 лет назад +81

      This is the most useful conversation I've found on RUclips

    • @itsKaceMusic
      @itsKaceMusic 5 лет назад +7

      *HATE SPEECH* Satan is a black transexual woman. Get it right!

  • @revnede
    @revnede 6 лет назад +532

    "The whole reason behind the bones is the time spent butchering with the family!"

    • @zejdland
      @zejdland 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/uU4q415Rkb0/видео.html mhm is math science?

    • @reformedzoomer
      @reformedzoomer 3 года назад

      @@zejdland Wut

    • @zejdland
      @zejdland 3 года назад

      @@reformedzoomer yes?

    • @alsocupcakes8885
      @alsocupcakes8885 3 года назад

      @@reformedzoomer reported for spam

  • @Sacchidanand
    @Sacchidanand 6 лет назад +321

    Sunwise and antisun wise.

  • @GreenGretel
    @GreenGretel Год назад +96

    "But when I was a child, our whole family would go down the public square, we'd get around that ceremonial mound, and we'd go sunwise and anti-sunwise - it was a _family_ thing to do." One of my fave lines here. 🤣

  • @LuisCalderon_HN
    @LuisCalderon_HN 5 лет назад +168

    -Not everyone literally believes that phantoms will come to replace...
    -OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH

  • @STeeLfighterz
    @STeeLfighterz 3 года назад +91

    “That is appalling.. kids being more familiar with a fictional character than with a real ghoul...”. Pure gold lol

  • @sandrsofias
    @sandrsofias 13 лет назад +398

    Best. Onion. Ever.
    Btw, "Get out your amulets!"

  • @alexanderpataki5567
    @alexanderpataki5567 10 лет назад +631

    ...and then we'd all gather around as my grandpa would read from the Necronomicon and sprinkle stags blood over those in attendance. Those were the days!

    • @Lucifronz
      @Lucifronz 8 лет назад +19

      A Necronomicon? Duuude, those are rare. Hope you kept it.

    • @alexanderpataki5567
      @alexanderpataki5567 8 лет назад +3

      Oh, for real? I didn't know it was a real thing, I've seen numerous references to it in pop-culture (Evil Dead, Simpsons, ect) but thought it was more myth than reality. My post was more meant to be a tongue-in-cheek way to mock those who see mainstream, commercial "Halloween" as somehow occult or satanic.

    • @Lucifronz
      @Lucifronz 8 лет назад +20

      Alexander Pataki ....this would be the point where I let out a sigh.
      No, the Necronomicon is not real.

    • @Sorakeyblademaster37
      @Sorakeyblademaster37 7 лет назад +13

      Lol but no. Necronomicon was thought up by Lovecraft, and unsurprisingly it's yet another feature of his life's works that's taken on a life of its own. Even when he was alive he had to clarify multiple times there is no Necronomicon and he just made the thing up. Unfortunately some people REALLY need to get out in the real world more often.

    • @alexanderpataki5567
      @alexanderpataki5567 7 лет назад +9

      it probably IS a real thing, and you guys have been duped along with the masses into thinking it's a modern literary trope, so that those who seek it's true awesome powers can revel in the godlike gifts it will confer upon them in peace, without having to deal with a bunch of rank amateurs such ahs yourselves battling them for mastery of the arcane knowledge.

  • @Speak4Yourself2
    @Speak4Yourself2 4 года назад +58

    "Frightening away the demons is reason for the season."

  • @FromTheRoomOfLittleEase
    @FromTheRoomOfLittleEase 3 года назад +115

    This and the schizophrenia one are the best. Not because of the rad subject matter or whatever; I honestly think the writing and performances here are their absolute best.
    This never fails to get a laugh out of me.

    • @PhantasmalBlast
      @PhantasmalBlast Год назад +15

      “The situation in Nigeria seems pretty complex.” Is my absolute favorite. They so perfectly capture the mannerisms of a class of highschoolers who didn’t do the reading.

  • @hemipemi
    @hemipemi 5 лет назад +76

    I lost it at "Someone complained about the howling!!"

  • @VizIchi23
    @VizIchi23 5 лет назад +109

    every one of these late 2000s skits are amazing. but every time i see duncan (or whoever plays him) i know it's gold

    • @adgato75
      @adgato75 5 лет назад +3

      He's been a bit actor in lots of stuff. Recently , he was a main actor on "People of Earth" on TBS.

  • @TheOnion
    @TheOnion  11 лет назад +274

    Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized? The Onion weighs in.
    Subscribe to The Onion's RUclips Channel: bit.ly/xzrBUA

    • @Phil.Grainger
      @Phil.Grainger 11 лет назад +8

      dangers of using an old foxnews studio

    • @sgiff
      @sgiff 11 лет назад +4

      Has the Onion become boring and so last year? I think so.

    • @walterjnr
      @walterjnr 11 лет назад

      Did they manage to blame Republicans for something? That's what most of their skits consist of.

    • @TheLuisMiranda
      @TheLuisMiranda 11 лет назад

      Lol. Overcomercialized???
      I guess, being commercialized is ok.

    • @AaronSherman
      @AaronSherman 11 лет назад +7

      One of their best. Nicely done!

  • @tugboat2030
    @tugboat2030 8 лет назад +440

    THINK ABOUT OUR WELLS

    • @TCt83067695
      @TCt83067695 6 лет назад +4

      tugboat2030 i died

    • @Frogkhan915
      @Frogkhan915 5 лет назад +2

      XD

    • @zejdland
      @zejdland 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/uU4q415Rkb0/видео.html mhm is math science?

    • @lindsay4659
      @lindsay4659 3 года назад +4

      I thought she said whales lol

  • @psychologicalsuccess3476
    @psychologicalsuccess3476 4 года назад +364

    This would be good to show a child, they’d think adults did this as kids.

    • @mittenstherealest
      @mittenstherealest 4 года назад +15

      What? You didn't?

    • @Tjalve70
      @Tjalve70 4 года назад +26

      @@mittenstherealest We didn't.
      We sacrificed to the NORSE gods. Not this new fashined culturally imported Halloween stuff.

    • @dillbill7152
      @dillbill7152 4 года назад +6

      Yeah except we did actually do this stuff.

    • @zejdland
      @zejdland 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/uU4q415Rkb0/видео.html mhm is math science?

    • @radicalfishstickstm8563
      @radicalfishstickstm8563 Месяц назад

      I mean this is meant to satirize the war on Christmas sooo

  • @bookadmirer.3699
    @bookadmirer.3699 4 года назад +59

    Playing in the blood puddles was my favorite thing about Halloween as a child.

  • @declanjames5604
    @declanjames5604 Год назад +19

    “Get out your amulets” gets me every time

  • @Just_Some_Guy_with_a_Mustache
    @Just_Some_Guy_with_a_Mustache 4 года назад +438

    Didn't even acknowledge how insensitive "Happy Halloween" is. My beliefs are based on the New Scriptures. Performing rituals to ward off the Eldritch gods of the cosmic beyond like Nyarlathotep with the screeching of sacrificed sea animals. A "Happy Holidays" will do just fine, thank you very much.

    • @Vladimir66616
      @Vladimir66616 4 года назад +4

      Youev lost your popularity m8 rip

    • @Lordecai
      @Lordecai 4 года назад +1

      fuck you Skeleton Bones Ghoulie

    • @Adelei42069
      @Adelei42069 4 года назад +24

      THIS IS A WAR ON HALLOWEEN!! IN MY DAY WE SAID HAPPY HALLOWEEN AND WORE MASKS TO SCARE OFF DEMONS!!

    • @artthenecromancer404
      @artthenecromancer404 3 года назад +15

      EXACTLY!
      ITS NOT EVEN CALL HOLLOWEEN!
      IT’S “HÅLLOW’S DARK EVE OF THE FEASTING SPIRITS”

    • @Nana-wi4gi
      @Nana-wi4gi 3 года назад +2

      The war on Halloween

  • @UnintelligibleCourtneyM
    @UnintelligibleCourtneyM 9 лет назад +264

    This is the best video the onion has ever produced. The tradition Halloween song made my sides launch into orbit.

  • @thecyuber558
    @thecyuber558 4 года назад +25

    i just love the transition between the satanic summoning and the headline on the tv

  • @harktischris
    @harktischris 4 года назад +39

    The onion's news anchors and panelists absolutely nail their roles. Way better than any "news report" in a typical movie. Even the chyrons and intro/outros are amazingly well done.

  • @josephsolis6109
    @josephsolis6109 5 лет назад +60

    "The reason for the season" 😂 the way she said that made me laugh so hard!!

  • @jasonmartz4965
    @jasonmartz4965 Год назад +18

    I always come here every Halloween to remember what we lost.

  • @wongdor
    @wongdor 16 лет назад +52

    lol, I was thinking, "hm, this one is alright.."
    then I got to the ENDING.. lmao

  • @INTJadeSpider
    @INTJadeSpider 8 лет назад +366

    I watch this every Halloween, though it better reflects every "controversy" about Christmas.

    • @peachlover8572
      @peachlover8572 5 лет назад +103

      Yes there making fun of the war on Christmas with Halloween.

    • @BNK2442
      @BNK2442 5 лет назад +27

      @@peachlover8572 *they're

    • @coffe4meplz
      @coffe4meplz 2 года назад +1

      Hi Simon :)

  • @jasonmartz4965
    @jasonmartz4965 Год назад +6

    I hope everyone has their amulets ready for the dark lords arrival. Please prepare at least a month in advance. No half ass sacrifices.

  • @quietcorner293
    @quietcorner293 5 лет назад +105

    Reminds me on how we ruined Black Friday as well. Stephen Colbert once said, that Black Friday was becoming too commercialized.
    "What happened to trampling people for the love of the game? Or just the pure joy of throat-punching an old lady over that last $20 Dirt
    Devil?"

    • @nathangamble125
      @nathangamble125 4 года назад +2

      ​@Tatsujiro Kurogane Their bodies are compensating for their greed! They can't give up too much bottom!

  • @Runny117
    @Runny117 4 года назад +36

    Clifford Banes is a smart man. He's still holding out until things cool down. things got even worse in 2020

  • @HansDester
    @HansDester Год назад +10

    "LET GO OF HIM" "IT'S TOO LATE!"

  • @TheSeptet
    @TheSeptet 12 лет назад +20

    I know I've said this a few times during my stint on the Internet, but this is, without a doubt,
    THE.
    BEST.
    VIDEO.
    EVER.

  • @iamrobbyd
    @iamrobbyd 3 года назад +11

    “frightening away demons is the reason for the season”

  • @sandrabaron1703
    @sandrabaron1703 Год назад +9

    Frightening away demons is the reason for the season.... Why do I love this sentence so much?

    • @jeanblaaa
      @jeanblaaa Год назад

      Because it rhymes! 😍

  • @bobbobby632
    @bobbobby632 2 года назад +15

    “That is appalling, more kid are familiar with a fictional cartoon than a real goul”
    Best and most underrated line in this entire video

  • @fostardust8284
    @fostardust8284 4 года назад +17

    "im not saying i'm not afraid of ghouls, I'm terrified of them"

    • @yugen
      @yugen 3 года назад

      lmao I think that's my favorite bit

  • @ShadesOfFall
    @ShadesOfFall 15 лет назад +28

    "Think about our wells!" Hilarious.

    • @AntonDiwa
      @AntonDiwa 3 года назад +5

      It's been eleven long years and this comment has only gotten 3 likes. You have probably forgotten about this account by now, and this comment, and maybe even the onion, but I think that's poetic in a way.

    • @JuliansStuffRoblox
      @JuliansStuffRoblox Год назад

      Whales

  • @xPythox
    @xPythox 14 лет назад +15

    "Someone complained about the howling!"
    "Complained about the howling? Well how are you supposed to drive the evil spirits away?"

  • @lovelysan
    @lovelysan 11 лет назад +45

    Ahahaha, this is still my favorite The Onion skit. Watch it every year and it never fails to bring a (traditional halloween chant) song in my heart.

  • @akorn1
    @akorn1 3 года назад +18

    "Donning animals skins and dancing around a fire pit is the MOST important event of the whole holiday" omfg I'm dying

  • @flamesabrethedark
    @flamesabrethedark 14 лет назад +17

    "Everybody, get out your amulets!!!"
    best line ever

  • @avocadomonkey4892
    @avocadomonkey4892 2 года назад +90

    The tragedy is that, 10+ years on, things are still the same, if not worse. Thanks to COVID, there are drive-through bonfires where people through their supermarket-bought, pre-cut bones through their car windows as they drive by. The Onion continues to be uncannily relevant across time! (Their amulets must be working overtime!)

  • @MrOmnisun
    @MrOmnisun 11 лет назад +39

    I miss classic onion. They need to bring it back!

    • @PhyreI3ird
      @PhyreI3ird 4 года назад +5

      It's impossible. The world has been plunged head first so far into absurdity that the classic kind of satire just isn't possible right now.

  • @Hollandhallock
    @Hollandhallock Год назад +8

    I hope things clear up for Clifford banes soon

  • @AxelQC
    @AxelQC 2 года назад +6

    I love the mashup of cable news arguments and "Cabin in the Woods".

  • @IYAMNI
    @IYAMNI 16 лет назад +84

    "It's appalling, kids being more familiar with a fictional character than a real ghoul."
    Oh, smack!
    Masters of satire.

  • @anonymoussecret5948
    @anonymoussecret5948 4 года назад +15

    Frightening away demons is the reason for the season 😂 That delivery killed me

  • @SarahHachey
    @SarahHachey 16 лет назад +19

    I must say, this is one of the best Onion videos, especially the ending! xD

  • @Lapusso650
    @Lapusso650 7 месяцев назад +1

    “ because someone complained about the howling!”😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @DDub04
    @DDub04 4 года назад +78

    As a family who uses artificial bones, it’s simply unfair to say that we must go out of our way to harvest our one bones, and we can easily celebrate the season in more way than we could if we had to butcher and harvest our own bones. Don’t knock it until you try it.

  • @Coratlan
    @Coratlan 10 месяцев назад +4

    15 years later and this exact conversation is happening about Day of the Dead in Mex/Central American circles.
    Its become less about honoring and remembering the dead and just halloween 2 with a latino flair.

  • @ampisbad
    @ampisbad Год назад +5

    and some people say the Onion is satirical, smh my head

  • @relentlessgaming6870
    @relentlessgaming6870 Год назад +4

    I come back to this every Halloween, legendary!

  • @trrt2719
    @trrt2719 3 года назад +15

    I so love that this is factual about the origins of Halloween so many centuries ago!

  • @tl7988
    @tl7988 22 дня назад +2

    “You’re gonna anger the spirits.” I’ll be using this going forward in any political or cultural conversation

  • @redskull2006
    @redskull2006 16 лет назад +7

    "GET OUT YOUR AMULETS" lol

  • @gotisenot
    @gotisenot 2 года назад +54

    As a certified Boomer myself i feel like Duncan so often when i talk to other boomers it blows my mind, iam proud of you kids, you guys really do be kickin ass, you guys are more united then my Generation and my parents generation combined, you guys are politicaly not that interested because it isnt intressting to see old people making choices that fuck over your own generation, your music is weird but its more varity then ever its more creative on the broad spectrum then ever before and you guys actually express yourself, iam watching a lot of young artists on twitch and TikTok, some of that Art is so beautiful, you are more honest then we while still trying to be as nice about it as ever before.
    You guys dont buy houses because my Parents and my Generation fucked the Market economy your money isnt getting you the same stuff as our money once did i saw the "my Parents at 20 VS. me at 20" and yes our rackless behaviour back in the day made this possible on the cost of you guys. And some of yall are depressed because this World can be depressing it may not be the worst time in history to be alive but definitly one thats not in favor of the youth at all. You guys arent a shame to the people that fought wars for our free world, you guys are using the freedoms our grandfathers fought for and they would be proud of yall trust me.

    • @zehtroid
      @zehtroid 2 года назад +1

      Cool story, bro.

    • @GrahamBurgers
      @GrahamBurgers 2 года назад +12

      I'm glad not all boomers are like the bad stories I've heard - super glad to see some positivity.

    • @lowtech42
      @lowtech42 2 года назад +9

      appreciate you saying this! 🥺

    • @MadisonR2006
      @MadisonR2006 Год назад +7

      This is so sweet. Idk what it has to do with the video, but as an 18 year old it was nice to hear. My grandpa has said similar things. I bet you have grandchildren and you’re their favorite grandparent.

    • @gotisenot
      @gotisenot Год назад +6

      @@MadisonR2006 iam not that old yet got a son though, so maybe iam who knows. :)

  • @ratking6133
    @ratking6133 4 года назад +12

    "Frightin' away demons is the reason for the season"

    • @drabberfrog
      @drabberfrog 4 года назад +1

      That's my favorite part of the whole video.

    • @drabberfrog
      @drabberfrog 4 года назад +1

      0:56

  • @boostedfox
    @boostedfox 2 года назад +4

    Ok, who tf is Clifford Baynes, and how is he always absent????

  • @cabinjackalope
    @cabinjackalope Год назад +2

    God, this was one of the best ones, I swear

  • @robbylebotha
    @robbylebotha Год назад +18

    2 minutes of any Onion show is better than ALL the episodes of SNL that exist. And better actors than 95% of Hollywood movies.
    How they just vanished is beyond me

    • @drabberfrog
      @drabberfrog Год назад +2

      Ikr

    • @SushiCombo
      @SushiCombo 11 месяцев назад +4

      They vanished because Duncan had summoned the evil spirits.

    • @drabberfrog
      @drabberfrog 11 месяцев назад

      @@SushiCombo if only Duncan had heeded their warning

    • @KleerAsDay
      @KleerAsDay 11 месяцев назад

      Vanished? They've been going for like 300 years now, I don't think they're gonna vanish anytime soon

  • @thetigerking2613
    @thetigerking2613 3 года назад +7

    The holloween they described sounds a lot more fun the tricker treating.

  • @CherryMK_6
    @CherryMK_6 11 месяцев назад +5

    happy halloween world heritage post

  • @Aegorraasreturned
    @Aegorraasreturned 2 года назад +4

    “sunwise and anti-sunwise”

  • @iaexo
    @iaexo 3 года назад +10

    My goodness the ending had me laughing myself to tears (but not conjuring my deepest fears (I hope...))

  • @AyokiMing
    @AyokiMing 5 лет назад +11

    This show has the same energy as "Welcome to Nightvale"

  • @ThereIsNoSpoon678
    @ThereIsNoSpoon678 2 года назад +2

    That turn at the ending though.

  • @leofreaking
    @leofreaking 4 года назад +103

    "Has Halloween Become Overcommercialized?"
    Huh, that's actually a good point, why is this an Onion video?
    Oh, I see..

    • @mcmb8254
      @mcmb8254 4 года назад +3

      How is it a good point?

    • @leofreaking
      @leofreaking 4 года назад +16

      @@mcmb8254 Because basically any holiday nowadays (like many other aspects of life) have become overcommercialized?

    • @DimIsHigh
      @DimIsHigh 4 года назад +6

      @@leofreaking dude, halloween is a commercial holiday at its core

    • @cadian101st
      @cadian101st 4 года назад +12

      DimIsHigh it was a cultural holiday and a religious holiday long before it was a commercial one

    • @DimIsHigh
      @DimIsHigh 4 года назад +6

      Seamus yeah no shit, 2000 years ago

  • @security864
    @security864 2 года назад +4

    Bro that ending is fucking priceless

  • @sidgt16
    @sidgt16 2 года назад +3

    That's the price to pay for not having your amulet with you at all times.

  • @nelsonta00
    @nelsonta00 2 года назад +2

    That Clifford Bane must live an exciting life.

  • @r.m.5548
    @r.m.5548 4 года назад +4

    I wish real news was as honest as this

  • @InsertName125
    @InsertName125 7 лет назад +31

    Keep the Howling in Howloween.

  • @Sunnychuu
    @Sunnychuu 5 лет назад +6

    "Demon is the reason for the season"
    that rhyme *chef's kiss

  • @AdamThomas28
    @AdamThomas28 Год назад +2

    These actors are too good at this

  • @almicc
    @almicc 2 года назад +4

    oh my god i've never seen something this intense on a legitimate and reputable news show. i need to renew my cable subscription

  • @Soooooooooooonicable
    @Soooooooooooonicable 7 лет назад +8

    I come back every year to watch this. Still cracks me up.

  • @trrt2719
    @trrt2719 5 лет назад +5

    I love how all these examples in the videos are real things about what halloween used to be

  • @Sevencoins7
    @Sevencoins7 4 года назад +2

    Since 1894, it’s the first time I caught that

  • @browsertab
    @browsertab 4 года назад +5

    I will always love The Onion for going there.

  • @Junebug89
    @Junebug89 Год назад +2

    Duncan has written a shocking number of books, it seems there is a new one every segment!

  • @jadegrace1312
    @jadegrace1312 4 года назад +3

    This is it, this is the best Onion video.

  • @The1Dragonprincess
    @The1Dragonprincess 11 месяцев назад +2

    Good time for a recommendation! Happy Halloween! 🎃

  • @AngeloXification
    @AngeloXification 4 года назад +6

    The Onion universe is terrifying.

  • @nickre96988
    @nickre96988 6 месяцев назад +1

    I love when they just all start shouting at each other