Martin Lawrence Monologue - Saturday Night Live
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- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
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Martin Lawrence has been chased by the censors all week, and he admits that he's afraid of 90s women. Aired 02/19/94
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Funniest thing about this is that he starts off his monologue about how the industry is trying to censor him and then… he gets fucking censored and banned. Shit is straight up an episode of Martin lmao
hell today you wouldnt even be able to air this performance.. too many karens and snow flakes would bitch about his offensive humor.. comedians are pretty much walking on thin ice every where these days cause of all the fucking people these days who scream that is toxic or thats racist.. or offensive... no fucking skin these days.. no sense of humor.. people are becoming fucking offended babies over everything..
@@theonetruth1478 its on peacock
@@nathan3170 doesnt matter if its on peacock fool it from the past.. I could play hitler movies from the past doesnt mean they will get made today.
@@theonetruth1478 Well they did do a recent remake of Hitler about him reappearing in modern time from a Multi Universe. You know before Multi Universe was an actual thing.
@@AwesomeBlackDude well he did have a super power
In the season finale of S2 of Martin he alludes to being banned from SNL.. “WNBC won’t even talk to me…it’s like I’ve been banned 🤣🤣”
"So, I told them to kiss my ass!" I remember that episode 😂😂😂
@@TGF25 cue martin theme song
I'm looking this up because I'm on that episode literally just now watching reruns on a streaming app. I caught on to it but never heard about it
So I told em to kiss my.. [Martin theme song]
Martin Lawrence removed monologue transcript
"Something else concerns me and it hurts, see I’m, I’m single, I’m a
single man, I don’t have nobody, I’m looking for somebody and- but I’m
meeting a lot of women out there, and you got some beautiful women, but
you got some out there that, uh, I gotta say somethin’. Um… some of you
are not washing your ass properly.* (laughter & applause) OK? Don’t-
don’t get me wrong, not all, some of you, you know what I’m sayin’, uh…
I’m sorry, ‘Cause uh, listen, now, I don’t know what it is a woman got
to do to keep up the hygiene on the body I know, uh, I’m watching douche
commercials on television, and I’m wonderin’ if some of you are reading
the instructions. I don’t think so. Y’know, ’cause I’m getting with
some of the ladies, smelling odors, going “Wait a minute. (gestures with
index finger) Girl, smell this! This you! Smell yourself, girl.”
Smell yourself! I tell a woman in a minute, douche! douche! Some
women don’t like when you tell them that, when you straightforward with
them. “Douche!” They, (imitating woman) “Forget you! You cannot douche
all the time, you’re gonna wash all the natural juices out the body.” I
say, well, I dont give a damn what you do, put a Tic-Tac in your ass.
Put a Cert in your ass. Oh, oh, y’know, this look like a good damn place
for a Stick-up up in your ass.
I’m sorry, y’all. You got to wash properly. You know, and then, you
know, ’cause I’m a man, I like to kiss on women, you know, I like to
kiss all over their bodies, you know. But if you’re not clean in your
proper areas I can’t… you know… kiss all over the places I wanna kiss.
You know, some women’ll let you go down, you know what I’m sayin’,
knowin’ they got a yeast infection. (Some audience disgust) I’m sorry.
Sorry. Come up with dough all on your damn lip… Got a bagel and a
croissant on your lip. “Anybody got any butter?” I like jelly on mine."
AVS Prod. SNL-322-A08 (under fair usage)
Judge for yourselves
THANKYOU!!!! People need to give this persons comment more likes
*🐐 Mersi, #RayRogers! It's nice after the moment of disappointment over the missing most juicy part, it immediately pops up down here, in the first comment. Very thoughtful of you, brother.
This shit is hilarious lol
honestly I feel like this is one of those rare times where a monologue like this would pass today's everyday censors. It's weird how back then it was more offensive to talk about feminine hygiene when now it's all over the damn place.
P.S. - This transcript made me laugh my ass off, so I can only imagine what the actual monologue felt like live
The formal translation of the jokes to the censored card is so funny to me
I would to hear his whole set interpreted this way lol
Man I miss this Martin 😂😂😂 he so laid back now it’s ridiculous. But his crazy facial expressions and hyper persona was the funniest shit ever.
Yeah true but hes grown now and he knows he cant be as wild as he was coz he will end up dead lol hes a wild boy n when u know how wild u are u gotta chill cz that shit dnt end well hes still a legend
90s Martin energy
@@jaxnorthmusic7863 end up dead? He is a clone
The magic of cocaine
For those that are wondering, the part that gets cut off is in his stand up comedy "You So Crazy". The whole monologue was from that comedy routine.
I was thinking so because I remember that Segway opening quite well from that stand up... which was hilarious. I'll never forget that bit.
It's over1 hour. do you know when it strats?
@@manbeard8678 I don't, but the whole thing is worth watching if you have time. It's Martin Lawrence at his best.
💯
No it wasn't you hack
I thought the censor statement at the end was part of Martin's SNL monologue at first! Guess Martin was too raw for SNL! 🤣
Nope. He was banned from the show because of that raunchy monologue.
I love the fact that the guy doing the disclaimer is Robert Downey Jrs Uncle.
Whaaaat
Whats his name?
@@ker-mit Jim Downey
Must be why Downey did the show in 85-86 while filming Weird Science with his SNL co star Anthony Michael Hall. Everyone got fired in 86 but Nora Dunn, Al Franken, Jon Lovitz and Dennis Miller. Rest were fired. Terry Sweeney, Danitra Vance, Joan Cusak, Randy Quaid, Damon Wayans, Robert Downey Jr. and Anthony Michael Hall. A. Whitney Brown also appeared infrequently and he ended up doing more in 87 on Weekend Update with the A. Whitney Brown minute. Later was on Daily Show from 1997 to 2001.. Last year's with Kilborn and first two seasons with Jon Stewart.
Less respect for SNL. So lame
Women not “washing their asses properly” is an old Redd Foxx joke.
It’s not a joke
He brought it to a new level!
Would like to see the whole uncensored monologue.
see comment above!
It was vulgar but not funny.
@@junodonatus4906 maybe. But it also wasn't a bannable offense.
@@ramonw9430 it was back in the nineties, apparently... but yeah, pretty tame and unfunny in my opinion.
I saw it live and I am lead to believe it is on a documentary at the very end in full that Martin did of his career. Unaware of the film. But I was watching the show live and saw no issue with the monologue. Only found out about the controversy watching the reruns on cable in 1996. Two years later. With the disclaimer.
Before I knew Martin was actually censored, when I first saw this (not live) I thought the voice over part was part of the joke and always thought it was funny. Like he was about to do a gross part of his bit that everyone who’s seen him in aware of, so the gag is he’s blocked out and a white guy describes what Martin is saying.
🤣🤣🤣
Same here! Thought this was just part of the joke
They’re playing it as a joke for sure
It's made to look like part of the sketch, for sure. Watch "Here Today" with Billy Crystal for an example of how SNL spins flaws into jokes.
this is one of most remeber and funniest monologue on saturday night live. martin did not hold back.🤣💯
I have that entire monologue on VHS. Gonna have to figure a way to upload it sometime
Omg, please!!
Well hurry tf up n***a
F'n RUclips allready has us censored as well
PLEASE PLEASE !!! Do it
Post on RUclips
You gotta post it, bro. #doitfortheculture
"Ain't no stopping' me now," he said before getting his monologue censored.
How can you ban him and upload his clip
One of those infamous moments in history... SNL history
Agreed. I feel like that’s a case where they need to upload the uncensored
@@MidnightSwinger Yeah do it SNL. We can hack it.
I was expecting the uncensored version lol
they didn't upload that part, smart guy
The fact Martin mentions about censoring n then they censor him is the funniest sh*t ever. 🤣
Martin Lawrence is one of the funniest truth tellers in comedy all time.
How would you know? I doubt you have ever seen what he talked about.
LOL! Appears Martin thought he was doing stand up on Def Comedy and not a monologue on SNL! Priceless!!!!
"It was a frank and lively presentation, and nearly cost us all our jobs" LMAOO
you obviously don't know what he said... because you would have said, LMmothafuckin'AOO
@@JohnSparkmanandBlackTopHerdey, nothing funnier than a comedian's jokes costing people their jobs lol
To know that is what got him banned is absolutely hilarious. Martin is one of the funniest comedians ever.
This isn't his full monologue. As you can see in the video, they edited out the parts that got him banned.
Maybe one of the best movie comedians, but his stand up isn't even kind of funny
@@zacharyhall3588 word.
@Zachary Hall false
Never funny
He really got that leg up high at the end 🤣🤣
Yeah, right at the shove a .... ..... up your ...... or somethin'
The sudden graphic makes this 100 times funnier.
Just Martin being Martin LMFAO
The unedited version has to exist somewhere!
Did you find it
I wish. I've seen an uncensored transcript online, but the unedited video doesn't seem to be anywhere.
Its from his stand up ...-You so crazy.
It's on dailymotion
I saw it live as a kid.
I’ve never seen an snl monologue like this 😆😆😆😆 Martin is hilarious
He got banned for life
You need to watch Louis CK's opening monologues. He was on there at least two times maybe three
He reminds me of tupac
Martin on that good stuff
“at this point in his monologue🤓”
Martin always was so fresh
But I guess his women weren't!
I never knew that he was on Saturday Night Live
Apparently he was banned for talking about smelly vagina. Smdh. Shame.
Notice something about all the ppl referring to Martin as a crackhead or just being negative about it?...hmmmm
they nearly lost all their jobs because of a monologue of Martin ?
I mean when you are almost losing your job because somebody talks some stuff on tv that means your business is fucktop
You could tell that the writers tried to be funny with that spoken explanation of why it was censored. They definitely wouldn't have lost their jobs, maybe a couple but not everyone.
Indeed
No, it absolutely was that controversial at the time. People talk about cancel culture like it’s a new thing, but this was cancel culture 30 years ago. America lost its mind because they couldn’t keep Marty Mar from going on live national TV & talking about douching for two minutes of his monologue. Absolutely tame by today’s standards (and it’s weird that they still haven’t restored the full original monologue), but people freaked out at the time (well, white people did, anyway).
Mfks sayin Martin coked out but let somebody like Will Ferrell did them same antics on stage it would’ve just been hilarious smh 🤦🏾♂️....
@Ricky Mills Racism will never go away
Yup!
@Ricky Mills it’s not a race card my brother, it’s literally the truth.
Chris Farley...
No way would Will Ferrell say this kinda stuff. Be real!
Anyway, I don't mind reading the monologue here (btw it's funny only because it's cringeworthy) but over the airwaves? Hell no.
I saw the live version of this monologue on the night it aired!
the edit at the end was fucking funny though
the way i see it the crowd was still laughing after he said all that and was excited....you blew it SNL
@AJ Estur Oh, yeah. They would have canceled a show going on for decades for a joke a guest made? How stupid are you? I don't believe any of tge actors were threatened with being fired either since it wasn't at all their fault. Not like they brought Martin Lawrence on or anything.
This aired and was quickly taken out of circulation....took me 30 years to see this ..
Definitely didn’t need SNL
Nope he did greater things after that...
Martin is NOT high. This is his normal set as an intro on Def Comedy Jam back in the day[mid 90s], not to mention, coming off his peak also, as lead on the newly introduced network, at the time, called: "FOX" back in the early 90s during their launch... this network partially started by Married With Children and In Living Color in the late 80s.
How u kno where u with him tht night 🤷🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️😂
No fucking way , dude I’m a huge coke head and this guy is GEEKED lmfaoo 😂
this was before bad boys and nothing to lose
This way the only time that he was on SNL. He was never asked back to come back again
Martin goes off - for real!
Nearly cost all of us our jobs! That's how you know HBO picked the right man at the right time to host Def Comedy Jam. Martin in the 90s was lightning in a bottle if the lightning was a black man. RUclips any of his Def Comedy Jam intros where he's talking to the audience before the comics come out... Stuff of legend!
Not only did martin hosted DCJ, but he was also the leading comic
Imagine almost losing your job because of a comedy legend having a good set
So real. Bro only said damn and ass and said some blue jokes. Man was just doing HIS job.
Bunch of losers in the comments that have NEVER seen him do stand up. This is his bit. He’s not on drugs.
It's actually Red Foxx's bit. Look up 'You Gotta Wash Your Ass' Its 10X funnier than anything Martin Lawrence has ever done.
@@copyright-ur1sf lol imagine searching through the comments to hate on martin in a video u looked up
@@nateg4008 Telling the truth is "hating" on him? Sorry I hurt your feelings, bro lol For what it's worth, this video was suggested to me, I didn't look it up.
@@nateg4008 Here's more "hate" lol: Maybe 86 the "Imagine" shit. That was played like 5 years ago.
"Martin Lawrence wanders L.A. with loaded gun, screaming at passing cars in 1996"
Search for that on google.
The dude is off his rocker.
5:45 when he took off that shirt and broke out doing Kung Fu moves.
Dragonfly Jones came out
That’s cocaine!!!! 😂😂😂😂🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽
I seen it live & I wish I would have recorded it. They knew what type of comedian he was, I don't know why they didn't do a 10 second delay like they did when Richard Pryor hosted the show
SNL Producers: So Martin, how much blow did you do before going on stage??
Martin: YES!
SNL, y'all owe that man an apology AND y'all need to lift the ban on him!!! 4give and let go. Martin deserves another chance to be back on the show. If u can let Dave Chappelle on there smoking a cigarette on camera, cussing, then why not let Martin back on? All because he was talkn about some reason shit. Please 🙄 Btw, I have nothing against Dave Chappelle. I love him. He's one of the realist comedians out there 💯
Dude, Martin Lawrence is a cool actor and This movie reminds me of The Bad Boys Trilogy right after I start off in 1995 through the year 2020.
I agree with him about the female hygiene. He is talking the truth
Sometimes it's an infection not always cause from sex r not cleaning correctly
Did the announcer call him Marvin Lawrence
Yep
No. I played it twice. Announcer got it right…..
@@pinonXO People might heard it wrong because the music is even louder than the announcer
After that night he was banned
Allegedly. Lawrence himself has said he was temporarily blacklisted from NBC-- seeing his scheduled _Leno_ appearance the following week get cancelled.
5:40 Weird Al probably watched this
Y'all mad at Lorne for Elon hosting. I'm mad at Lorne for banning Martin. We are not the same.
😂😂😂
Smashin knees and cutting Pilly packers 😂
I watched the live show that night. He was speaking his truth. There are a lot of women who could say the same about the men in their lives. They suffer privately.😞
The voice-over explaining the excised portion of the monologue is _way_ too serious. Martin was on _The Breakfast Club_ on the radio this year and has confirmed that he is *not* banned from _SNL._
In reality, he was temporarily blacklisted from NBC and had an appearance on _The Tonight Show_ canceled the following week.
That was their top writer. So I believe it was meant to be serious as a joke
@@budfloydi Was it Jim Downey who headed the writers at the time?
Because he said it was white and small....lol frfr
According to Lorne Michaels, he is banned. Martin can say whatever he wants, doesn't make it true.
He was on Tonight Show three years later with Tim Robbins promoting Nothing In Common. And was back for Big Momma's House a year later.
Smfh they won't even show it anymore!! Ppl can't even tell a joke without ppl catching feelings
He used to have so much energy
It’s called being young.
@@binaryvoid0101 More like "not having had a stroke yet". Supposedly he hasn't been the same since the '90s, to the point that even people who knew him before the first stroke said his whole personality was different after the 2000s hit. He'd probably still be this energetic if it weren't for what happened to him.
In 1994, all a stand up comic had to do was describe the Lorena Bobbit incident. Comic Relief that year was very repetitive.
Why put this up if we cannot hear the supposed offensive stuff. Here is the real offence, I can without trying too hard find really offensive material people being killed and mutilated on yt, but heaven forfend that I get to listen to a chap being humorous about female personal hygiene. Grow up.
This has been censored since it the day after it aired ok
I would love to see the removed part.
If you watch his stand up special "You so Crazy" it has the entire bit that was edited out. Just find that. You'll love it. It's one of the best stand ups of the 90's. Hilarious
Threw it on a bunch of snow cones😂😂😂. I die😂😂😂.
Maaaarvin Lawrence!
Dave Chappelle - Class act
Martin Lawrence - Repulsive
Easily offended huh
@@malcolmxpanther Yeah... because "easily offended" people definitely love referring to a man who joked about Michael Jackson raping kids as a "class act".
Have you tried turning your brain on today?
@@malcolmxpanther She felt personally triggered by the jokes about poor female hygiene. 😄
Tic Tac in @zz! 😂😂😂😂
What is beyond belief is that the sensors had no problem with leaving the part in about Martin joking about mutilating a man’s genitals, but talking about body odor was somehow beyond the limit. Really?
This country needs to grow up emotionally and get our priorities in order. It is unacceptable that anything to do with hurting a man’s genitals is considered funny. It is grotesque, perverse, and wrong.
PCP Martin is the best lol
I love Martin, idc 😭❤️
They must put this video back on youtube or something. I remember back in 2014 and 2015 I used to look for this video and I couldn't find it.
They doing something with the views. Why does Hollywood hate Martin he put the dress on and everything for them show the legend some respect
bruh cuz he wasn't that funny LMAO, not everything is a damn conspiracy
@@orlandoolague9292 😂 stop raining on my conspiracy SNL hated on Martin and you know it
@@Nomorequestionz62 howd they hate on Martin? He made jokes that just werent good?? Its why Chris Rock, Eddie Murphy, Keenan Thompson, Tracy Morgan, many other Black dudes have hosted but he hasn’t, cus his jokes fuckin sucked, this isn’t some race conspiracy, he sucked
@@orlandoolague9292 But he did host!! Obviously they thought he was worthy of that honor when he was at the height of is career. He's calmed down a lot recently. Martin still is spoking very highly of in his comedic circle and has a large clut following. Just say you don't think he's funny and move on. Smh.
@@orlandoolague9292 Martin is better than half of the guys you named.
I thought it was a much needed PSA, and Lume was created to take care of the problem. LOL
Thanks to Martin and Dr Klingman
Martin still did his thing anyway! 😅 banning the man but showing his clips on RUclips. SMH One of the reasons why I stopped watching Saturday night live until recent years... ANYWHO
The cast and crew weren’t bothered by it, but they got a lot of complaints from people about it so they higher ups band him so that it wouldn’t affect them in the long run. But it still suck that they did it so they wouldn’t look bad🤷🏽♀️. They have no beef with him so that’s probably why they posted it.
@@samealy2508they are milking the views its about the money
"They called ME" Martin the Legend. Supreme Goat.
Martin is very brave to be so open when sharing his thoughts and he is very energetic!
This video is banned in the US. Good thing for VPNs
i'm in the U.S. and i'm not using a VPN and I can see it just fine.
@@jadedheartsz where’s the link to watch the unedited clip?
@@angieb7106 Don't know.
@@angieb7106 on dailymotion and elsewhere
@@jadedheartsz same
Got him banned. HAHHAHHAHhahha. Only 200 complaints. Man, those were the days. ALSO, this version of the SNL logo is the best!
Anyone get the Dr. Squatch soap commercial while watching RUclips today? Double standards...
He got banned from going off script 🤣🤣🤣🤣 on this one... It's funny though...
With Martin Lawrence's infamous remarks about feminine hygiene now permanently censored, does that mean feminine hygiene TV commercials should be forever banned, just like Martin Lawrence getting a lifetime ban from 'SNL'?
Didn't know he did snl until today wow😅😢huge martin fan life is so weird lol
How the hell did this get him banned it was funny as hell
Cause he went too far about feminine hygiene after he first mentioned it so they had to cut it out and banned him
It’s not funny it’s so gross and wrong
@@GraceLove33 and reactions like yours make it funnier
@@GraceLove33 you’re just mad because what he said is true
@@GraceLove33 What he complains about in the about is gross and wrong. Hence why he joked about it. Lighten up. Or perhaps you were you personally triggered by it? 🤔
3:39 the real reason he got banned
I watched it uncensored. It's tame compared to far raunchier and "offensive" bits from guys like Daniel Tosh.
Jim Downey saves the day.😆
Marty Mar Lawrence Is definitely one of the True kings of Comedy. Can't believe no one has ever properly acknowledged him as that.
One of the funniest physical comedians to EVER do It, plus he found most our favorite comedians to this DAY!!!!
Tbh Katt Williams couldn't hold a CANDLE to prime Martin Lawrence. Martin In a old lady dress Is 100x funnier than Katt Williams In a pimp suit. There. I said It.
He's not banned Marvin is banned. Lol
Damn. Lorne Michaels must have the most unsatisfied wife in the world.
Dude is friggin high like a kite. Wow.
70s: normal
90s: suspicious
He was not high that was Martin Lawrence. Period! He never did drugs nor was any drugs ever found in his system at any point and time during his career. Other than marijuana which if anything calms you, doesnt make u act crazy. So where the fuck u got that from I don't know.
@@cj1557 so sad people always wanna claim peiple with mental health issues are crazy or on drugs
@@Hellseventeen Yeah so true martin was always like that. Crazy because when Jim carrey or Will Ferrel act over the top they say its talent
@@blazekid4936 couldn’t have said it better
Look at that shirt! 😂
I first watched this on Comedy Central back in the 90s and I thought that the censored portion was part of the bit. The narrator had this unintentional dry humor to his voice.
If they were talking about male hygiene it wouldn't have been edited
The whole 'bit' was painfully unfunny. Lawrence has always been a poor man's Eddie Murphy. Comedy is all about craft: you can talk about female hygiene or anything at all, as long as you do it creatively. The creativity is what makes it funny. This wouldn't have worked at a Tuesday Open Mic in the suburbs. Lawrence had this giant platform, and this is what he talks about. The voiceover was actually funnier than the monologue.
Yeah if they where it wouldn’t of been cut out
Talking about anybody's genital hygiene is not something any network should broadcast
@@zacheryjequinto7259 but you can show man on man or woman on woman ... it's true so we can laugh....
@@RayTheProducer your mom was painfully unfunny
SNL needs to stop being Cowards and just show us the whole thing uncensored already!
Surely Martin triggered one Caucasian producer. Too close to home?😂
*Martins the GOAT* 🐐
This is a SNL page so your not going to get the full version. I seen the real monologue on Redditt, it is worth the search if you want the real story
First off who tf is ‘Marviiiin Lawrence’!? 😂🤦🏾♂️
Cocaine is a hell of a drug!
My very first thought! That bitched is coked out TO THE MAX!
Some of y’all never watched Martin and it shows
MARVINN??? Bro what . Don’t ever disrespect the GOAT
Martin's You So Crazy is still better than any of Dave Chappelle's stand-up specials