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The Advantage of Being Attractive: Alex From Target
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- Опубликовано: 12 авг 2024
- Like the story of how Audrey Hepburn was discovered, a lot of people fantasize about being spotted by a famous casting director when going about their day. What’s different today is the internet has made that entirely possible with a click of a button. Whether you’re on Instagram, RUclips, or Tik Tok the content you put online has the potential of going viral. This leads to a higher chance of someone important seeing it and asking you to star in their major project. Although not comparable to Hepburn, the modern day version of her story happened to this cashier at target, sending him to internet celebrity status overnight. At 16 years old, Alex became a meme known as “Alex From Target”. Despite this he has disappeared from the internet today. What happened? Were his looks not enough to keep his online followers?
Time Stamps:
0:00 Intro
1:40 How Alex Gained Fame from his looks
3:06 What does it mean to be "conventionally attractive"?
6:50 Testing an attractiveness hypothesis from the 1800s
8:20 How Alex benefited from his looks
10:28 The general benefits of being attractive
12:59 Why we think good looking people are so great
16:24 Mate selection as an advantage
19:35 What happened to Alex From Target after fame?
21:58 Self-Determination Theory
Find me Here:
RUclips: / designingdonna
Twitter: / psychedirl
Instagram: / psychirl
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Main Sources:
journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1...
pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/24214...
faceresearch.org/
psycnet.apa.org/buy/1996-0022...
mpra.ub.uni-muenchen.de/49392...
www.sciencedirect.com/science...
www.hofstra.edu/pdf/orsp_shah...
doi.org/10.1016/S0163-6383(98...
journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/...
www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/1...
This was 2014??? Time is a lie. Confirmed
Na I was in 7th grade. Feels about right lol
Fr tho I thought this was in 2015
I was 14 at the time....wow
I was still alive then lol 20 Years young
I was literally gonna type “no this was posted 5 days ago” 😩
Press F to pay respects to those that had their picture's used for "unattractive male" and "unattractive female" in that study.
F
F
F
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i've always thought the whole "story" of Alex from Target was so strange. This kid literally went on ellen simply because he was conventionally attractive. no other noticeable qualities, just attractive.
I went to high school w him and had no idea who he was I don’t think he was in any sports or theatre etc. no idea what he’s up to 😅
My main issue was that an adult snuck a picture of a literal child while they were at work and blasted their face on the internet. While 16 and 19 may not seem like a huge deal to some people, and maybe I’m just overthinking it..that’s still an adult thirsting over a minor.
Situation like these also are like transaction, the show gets content and uses a fad/trend and the guest get more than what they had before, notoriety for example.
@@ZachT that's so true. It was my main issue as well because he was a child at the time, a minor, and he was being bombarded with many adults (besides teens) thirsting after him. It's gross.
@@ZachT imagine the genders reversed
This whole thing was so gross. Taking photos of strangers without their consent and posting it on the internet, sexually objectifying a minor, making someone go viral just because they're attracrive.... ugh. I hate all of it
The underage element isn’t brought up enough. Dude was a child.
Ugh.
@@TemeriaForever i guess they assume its okay because he's a male. disgusting.
Its ok tho cuz a female stalked him any older man would have gotten jail time
Yeah, he was an average looking kid to me (my standards of beauty is more varied than most and I don't prescribe to all eurocentric standards of beauty). I think that girl should've faced some consequences for doing that.
@@buttarain27 ima straight dude and I'll admit any day he's a solid looking dude. As the video tried to explain, your preferences make up subjective attractiveness, whereas there's just people you know are attractive to the opposite sex and you can't deny that, which would be objective attraction. And also reading this was the most "I'm so different to everyone else and their tastes" shit I've ever read. Ew
I feel like if an older dude took a picture of a teenager girl bagging groceries, we wouldn't be having this discussion...why are women able to perpetrate sexual assault and objectification of other's bodies without being labeled "creeps"
Life’s not fair
People are irrational
There’s no Santa
As a woman, I totally agree. Most adult women wouldn't think this was okay, but the person that took the photo, I believe, was a teenager herself.
i completely agree however it was a teenage girl who took a picture of him not an old woman
@@robertvondarth1730 Ok
@@robertvondarth1730 plz say sike, who ate the cookies than😡
This is still suuper creepy tbh.
Like, the dude was 16 when someone took a pic of him and uploaded it without his consent. And he became a sex symbol while 16. Without his consent
Glad I’m not the only one who also thought the same!
2014 was a weird era
lmao i agree with u but he was far from a "sex symbol". regardless, the whole thing was werid esp with ppl on twitter
To build off of that, he was fired from Target because the managers were tired of people coming in just to see him. Idk if the move was because it was a distraction or a security risk for Target or if it was just to protect Alex himself.
Additionally, one of my friends saw him at Bahama Bucks. She said he didn’t look happy, but put a smile on and took a photo with some girls. She also talk me that the same girls made some remark about him being in sweats and looking normal. I was baffled by this because he literally is normal.
Now if it the situation had been a pic of a 16 year old girl? Would’ve gotten attention for a whole different reason. It’s really not that hard to respect people’s privacy and autonomy but some folks just don’t get that
Being attractive is like being rich... It gives you more options, not all if them are good, but it's still an advantage.
Yes ppl harass you
@@jennisejones6023 well you're more attractive to people so naturally they'll be drawn to you and want your attention. When such a desire is not reciprocated this behavior can become harassment. I'm not seeing your poi t.
Being attractive is way better if you’re a man compared to a woman. The movie Malena gives great insight into the tragedy of being a beautiful woman.
!save
@@user-yg2uf8ym6g I hope you don’t think being an ugly woman is better.
Honestly, the psychology behind attractiveness is so fascinating
And so sad. The most important aspect of your life is out of your control :/
@@IWantToStayAtYourHouse Attractiveness is hardly out of your control. Not everyone can be 9s and 10s but almost everyone can be a 7 or an 8
@@Jdb63 yeah sure buddy
@@IWantToStayAtYourHouse 🤷♂️
Is more biology than psychology
Pakistan had its own “Alex from target” a couple of years ago. The “Chai wala Arshad Khan”. He now has a hotel in London.
Looked him up and Alex wishes. He’s a very attractive man.
Well he did something with that fame...he wasn't delusional
I remember that guy. I didn't know he had a hotel in London.
He does have a swag mustache
@@rosedalinevaletine6931 eh
ok but imagine being the unattractive face in the baby study 😭
id die 😭😭
LMAOOO I WOULD CRY
@@fatimakhan4671 No the babies were determining which faces were attractive lol. It wasn't the babies' faces being judged, I'm pretty sure they were adult faces.
I was actually involved in an attractiveness study when I was in undergrad (not involving babies). I was one of the participants judging, not being judged. The people running the study were very serious about the confidentiality issues in it. Of course we weren't allowed to take any of the photos with us, we just rated them in the lab on the researchers' computers. We had to sign things saying that we wouldn't discuss the study with others and were told that if we knew any of the people photographed, to opt out of rating that person. Also I'm sure they didn't share the participants's final ratings with them or anybody else, I think that would definitely be unethical.
@@monkiram oh my bad. How old were the babies tho? Cause I'm pretty sure babies are like color blind for like the first 4 monrhs
good pic 😭
As someone who used to be fat and ugly and is now fit and attractive, I can say for a fact that attractiveness privilege is definitely a real thing.
same lmao
Yup agreed. I was an ugly duckling as a kid, then around age 18 I "filled out" so that my face and body became attractive, grew my hair, dressed differently and not only did I have girls asking me out all the time (ones that paid me no attention before), I had jobs and opportunities just thrown at me to the point I just wanted to be left alone. I literally remember one time going out to a club with 2 of my best friends I hadn't seen in a while, and had a few girls come up to me and ask me to dance and flirt with me. I actually got angry and said "no" and just wanted to spend time with my buds. It was crazy to think back to when I was in my early teens ever thinking that could be the case... mind blowing.
@@77dris then you woke up
@@Danuxsy damn you didnt have to do him like that 😂😭
@@user-pt1gy1jl8l He asked for it, btw why is your name RADISH, those pesky red things ugh!
I feel bad for him to be honest. Knowing people only like you because of your looks rather than your talent and skills. After all these years he’s himself and hopefully doesn’t get bombarded by people. I wouldn’t recognize him at all because it’s been so long and I feel people at this point forgot about him.
You’re so right. I didn’t recognize him when I used to work out at the gym that he did until another person pointed him out to me. In real life, he’s just another average looking human being. He’s actually nice and polite, minds his business, that to me is worth more than anything looks could offer.
Especially at the age he was.
What talents and skills?
Your looks are your (perceived) personality, if you are introverted and ugly then you are creepy, but if you are handsome then it's mysterious.
UUUUUGH, literally.
The benefits of being attractive: Everyone wants you.
The drawbacks of being attractive: Everyone wants you.
Another drawback is that you will find the people who you choose as a mate will sabotage you. Buy unhealthy food with hopes you’ll get fat and will discourage you from hanging out with friends or family. Causing unhappiness and depression
... and for woman, that's more than just slightly annoying. Look up 'acid attacks'. And unless you are somebody with a very high tolerance level for awful sights, do _not_ do an image search.
@@Julia-lk8jn i have seen them
And most people who want them don’t care to get to know their personality, they just are enamored by their looks :/
@@Cheskat32 saaaaammeeeeeee
If some dude had taken a picture of a girl working at target without her knowledge and put it online for thousands of other guys to simp over, it would be creepy as hell. I feel bad for Alex
Edit: Yes I know it happens to women all the time. No its not okay when men do it either. I'm just trying to put it into perspective, as most people would agree that its creepy to do to women, but Alex was kinda just expected to be ok with it
This literally happened to that one female police officers
That's so true and I never looked at it that way.
@S B No I'm not saying that. I know they do, but it usually doesn't reach this extend. I live in Germany and even here almost everyone knows who Alex from Target is.
@S B Not sure how you got that. OP is actually saying that it's NEVER okay, not that guys are innocent when THEY do it. She specifically says that it is creepy when guys do that.
@S B I found the man hater everyone. Jesus, they were just pointing out that its fucked that this was accepted, and okay'd by everyone, including media outlets. Not one person out of all those ppl thought to question whether this was morally right before they had him on their talk shows.This OP comment was about this sole issue, there are so many other conversations talking about women's issues. Why even comment unless you are going to add valuable insight? And OP is right, women get way more ppl at their defense when it comes to taking their photos without consent and blasting them, and I hardly see the public defend men who get non-consenting photos of them taken and posted.
Alex is awesome man, He didn't take the easy way out and go into the profession of modelling or social media which if he had done so would immediately guarantee success, but instead opted for fitness coach and built a career he can truly call his own, I am really proud of Alex
Attractiveness opens the door but talent keeps it open.
It's extremely unsettling how comfortable people feel with taking pictures of complete strangers without their consent.
I'm done replying.
Someone tried to do this to me once. I thought it was weird.
@@The_torero i bet your cuteness level is *alex from target*
Yeah it’s really fucked up how normalized this is. Reminds me of a video a couple years ago when someone filmed a girl in her car who was doing a tik tok dance, laughing at her. Everyone on the internet seemed to think it was hilarious, but the girl was just having fun by herself and was filmed without her consent by a complete stranger.
IKR??? is this not illegal in the US or what?
Is this video done with his consent?
Anyone notice how Attractive people are easily forgiven even if they are rude or sarcastic, compared to unattractive people 🤔
Ye, Jeremy Meeks almost beat to death a kid but women still want him and even give him money. If an ugly man did that they'd say ''Execute that creep please''. Looks is everything.
the unattractive person can be a angel and be vilified, And do someting very well, they will get no points for it....the good looking person will be treated wonderful even when they do something bad.
@@rudy1999same with Cameron Herron, all young girls campaigning for him to be released from prison even trying to blame the mother and daughter he killed
The way our biological systems are built to treat people you find unattractive different is beyond to me. I’ve been playing around with it a little as i have gained some confidence over the last few years (i’m currently 19) and actually know how to dress myself for once, and people have been so kind to me. I grew up being kinda the ugly duckling and didn’t have that many friends whereas now everybody treats me incredibly well and strangers come to me to chat all the time it’s so weird
That is the truth.
But naturally we are attracted to people who look " good" or are nice and easy to look at.
Somebody with an "ugly" or scary face is harder to look at or focus on rather a beautiful person who is easy on the eye.
Just like an eye candy.
But yeah the difference how people treat you is real.
And strangers talking for littlerally no reason to you finding excuses is real too.
I can completely tell a difference on how people treat me when going out in public with makeup and hair done vs dressed down with no make up and a bun. it’s literally night and day.
I should try this.
No nevermind, it probably is true and after trying it i would never want to leave my house without makeup 🥲
People seem to treat me exactly the same when I do this. Maybe my makeup wears off more than I realize during the day lol
Yeah, I hear that happens to ugly people.
It must suck. I feel really, really bad for y'all...
@@baconsarny-geddon8298 yeah it does suck :/
hopefully one day I’ll be attractive enough to have a sandwich as my profile picture 🙏🏻
As a man, it's very noticeable if you are out in public in a suit and tie compared to regular clothes.
I'm glad Alex decided to lead a normal life & pursue his real interests.
I just hope it didn't take a toll on his mental health first
But it would've also been okay if he wanted to become a social media star.
@YoStefan you do realize that there are many famous singers/actors/models who are also like what you describe, but end up killing themselves cuz of depression from hate. Ffs it seems like you hate him, and people like you can probably take a toll on his mental health
YoStefan you don’t know how mental health works and it’s hella funny
@@Snookered4568 Exactly. I just watched Framing Britney Spears on Hulu. Anyone would go insane under that microscope.
Trust me guys , it’s a hard pill to swallow , looks matter , it’s matters a lot
It doesn't. It really doesn't. Yeah it matters to superficial people. If you want to spend your entire life with superficial people go for it.
If not stop worrying so much. Jesus. 🤦🏿♂️
@@JohnPierre-lz6vb I told ya it’s an hard pill to swallow pal , just gulp it down with water , it matters, looks matters like it or not it’s a fact and facts don’t care about your feelings , and you liked your own comment
@@severussnape6207 It's really not hard for me. Haha.
Being physically attractive is like having a sharp arrow head. You'll hit more targets than a blunt arrow head.
As a waiter in my 20s, I always got better tips when I wore contacts instead of glasses. But I got even better tips when I wore very fitted pants. And it didn’t matter if I was waiting on men or women. The advantage was the same with both.
This is actually very common, my coworker looks way better than me and people just tend to focus on him even though I'm also there. People also think attractive people are smarter and healthier, it's just how it is and you can see this everywhere.
@@Danuxsy damn
@@Danuxsy that's true i have experience it
I'm 1000x more atractive with contacts than with glasses
@KD they will not admit bc it mostly isn't true, actually
Pretty privilege is real and I’m tired
Yep, if your just pretty naturally i guess you don't have to sell your body and soul to pay for plastic surgery and fillers
Exactly, I'd rather the world leave me alone at this point, I don't care if they think I'm beautiful 🤣
@@allandm everyone is beautiful! Look up Kibbe body types by Aly Art on RUclips! It’s changed my life!
@@kylechong8168 not true lmao
@@nah_. lol 💀
12:06 this is really true, one of the "trends" on tiktok is sexualizing criminals, and people in the comments of those videos are like, "ugh his hair is so prettyyy", and "i'd murder with him omgg" but for the criminals who were less "attractive", there were comments like "bruh his hair looks so greasy" and "crybaby lol"
The sociability thing hit me. I never realised it as a kid but it gradually started happening more and more throughout my life. I noticed it at first in middle school, attractive people were more popular, had more friends but I never realised ~actually~ why. When I got in high school I noticed when we went out (I'm in Europe) guys and girls would just approach my friends, start talking to them, either with good or bad intentions, and I would just get ignored, not even asking my name or anything, I would just be there, on the side. I would never get approached, anywhere, in any social context. I didn't get how my friends were making so many other friends because I can't even spark the interest to know the basics about me. And that sucks. I'm in a male-dominated area, while that dials it down a little bit because there is a smaller amount of girls you just stand out a bit from existing, but guys still aren't interested, and girls are so few that the odds of one of them approaching you and actually show interest in being friends are very low. Overall, it's just hard navigating this when I don't think I am that conventionally unattractive, but also because I don't really ever had the chance to practice, I have poor communication and sociability skills. I'm not the worst, I just find myself in a huge amount of awkward situations I don't know how to get out of graciously. And I hate it. Especially in the pandemic. 1st year of college done and I didn't make one single long-lasting friend. Just circumstance acquaintances.
well ur not alone , especially these days
saying that doesn't fix anything
but maybe it helps u cope and dont feel toooooooo bad
3:12 "This is what all ugly people say"
Naw sis, it's what's all ugly people are told.
for real -- that part made me pause. actually i believe it is the people who are attractive that typically tell it to ugly people almost as a consolation prize. but we all know that's not true.
@@Just999Me Yeah it's like the totally not favored kid telling everybody else that nobody gets treated better. They just dont want to admit that certain things are easier for them because it feels like cheating and they dont want to think they just achieved XY because they are attractive
FACTS
BLACKPILL in a nutshell
Yeah, but it's also what they tell themselves.
"When you're ugly and someone loves you, you know they love you for who you are. Beautiful people never know who to trust."
Drax the Destroyer
"When you're ugly and someone loves you"... found your mistake
@@aj2228 you know, its also how you approach people that make them feel. Just wanted to toss this thought to you
Regardless of the reason, you are still loved though 🤔
Someone who loves you sees your beauty. Everyone is beautiful
That's BS that most likely never happens in this shallow world. just my opinion.
Honestly good for Alex. Hope he’s living a good life. He was just a kid when he was suddenly thrown into a completely different world and didn’t feel like he could pass up the opportunity even though he didn’t feel like he belonged there.
Well, twitter users do ehat twitter users do.
congrats on the applaud feature, seems cool!
damn I watch u
When attractive people try to argue that being attractive doesnt give them any leverage in society, i just :')
HAHAHA give em a good shoulder pat for me 😂
It sometimes doesn't. Yes. The attractive girls might get more attention from men but these men end up wanting to have sex with them. They can't get a decent guy friend without being looked as an object.
@@thinmyatlwin7378 it's not only about dates.
@@NoName-mm6gh So,what?
@@thinmyatlwin7378 yea so when people get rejected with exceeding qualifications and experiences in jobs in favor of someone who is attractive just because they are attractive is a problem. The unattractive fails to live comfortably because they have to constantly have to fight how people perceive them first. There are stats that prove this. This isn't so what as simple as you make it.
The whole damn world is a huge beauty pageant
Sad but also so damn true
This👌
I fear, for people that still don't know this.
Thanka to men.
All of evolution is a beauty pageant
Imagine beating up a 16 year old, going to prison for it, then becoming famous. I really do hate this society sometimes.
Also, attractive people are definitely not more sociable. They sit around and wait for someone to talk to them lol
And dating a billionaire as well. Lmfao.
And people do talk to them because they are attractive haha, so that's enough
Yeah the longer I’m alive, the more I start to think the guys who think Tyler is the good guy in fight club where right.
And usually somebody does weather they are nice or a jerk.......
@@martiananomaly She's not a billionaire. L O L
My childhood friends mom told my mom that while she was pregnant she prayed that her daughter wouldn't be very pretty. Because her sister was really beautiful so much so people would ask for marriage interviews. Guys would pressure her. Than someone tries to kidnap and marry her. He failes thankfully but these kind of things keep happening. She was so scared that her daughter would have to live a similar life. Beauty is both a blessing and a curse
as someone who has lived their entire life with crippling body dysmorphia, this topic is so depressingly validating
I mean you can also present yourself as attractive , it's just a presentation
Validation! That’s the word I was thinking of. Yeah, I agree. This was a good video with a nice message.
I completely agree but just remember that looks don't define you! ❤️
@@allthetrees It's always easy to say that looks don't define you, but when it prevents you from getting into relationships, in jobs, affects your mental health, strangers call you names on the streets, it's kinda hard not to let it define you lol
Miss gurl just look in a mirror and work them angles!!!! Confidence really does make u more attractive!!!
We have man teaching a class in a mask stock footage already? Color me impressed
i mean.. it’s been almost a year 🙃
It just now hit me that we’ve been doing this for a year. Damn. Time is so messed up right now.
@@personneici2595 imagine being a stock photographer!
14:40 for anyone skimming the whole video like me
we have since march last year, every squirrel with an app is trying to stock nuts.
As someone who used to be fat and ugly, becoming fit and more attractive 100% worked to my benefit. Took me 3 years to attain my goal, but it was well worth the effort. It's fucked up that people are subconsciously wired to favor the attractive, but because that's the way things are, I knew what I had to do in order to get the respect I wanted.
As a doctoral student in an applied psychology field, I just want to say you do a tremendous job presenting the evidence for these theories and using interesting examples to create a narrative that "concretizes" pertinent concepts. Even knowing a lot of this stuff beforehand, I still find your videos very interesting and engaging. That is all :)
This is so apparent on Tik tok today, a attractive girl will just post a video of her face to a song and get thousands of likes. Makes me sad for younger girls who constantly compare themselves
Same goes for guys, attractive guy posts something on tiktok and is basically the next justin bieber
Facts same thing for a tiktok pretty boi,and similarly with instagram that’s why I don’t have all those social media stuff they give a false reality...living off the grid is the way to go.
@@peliac7319 Yeah, but the same people complaining about it are often going for those same types of people when it comes to dating.. As someone who is into nutrition and fitness, I know a lot of people who do it just for the looks, rather than the health benefits. I try to educate people about the more important benefits of taking care of your health and body, for much deeper reasons than just superficial looks!
Woo suicides through the roof lets go! USA will show japan whos the boss
@@cameronhopewell641 lol
Man, people are literally all over me after losing weight and when I was fat, I was ignored and even pointed at by a group.of guys once. I do not like people more now that I'm more attractive. I'm just more vigilant about who to trust. That niceness people give you when you're "hot" does not feel real. I hate how naturally fickle humans are.
@@dajaunkata i’d hate for my worth to be linked to how attractive i look. she has a point.
@@dajaunkata my point is that that makes the niceness feel shallow compared to connecting based on personality. Now it's like
Okay but where is this going? Why are we really "friends" now?
@@dajaunkata Dating is fine if it includes getting to know one another. But I can smell people rushing to get in bed with me without getting to know me first or treat me as less of a friend than I thought I was if I wasn't gonna give them what they want. Girls are rarely interested in friendships.
I’ve experienced this my whole life. Ive experienced weight gain / loss over and over again. I have hormonal issues. It’s hard. But when I am bigger I’ve had multiple men moo at me, I once had a guy harass me for an entire bus ride because I didn’t have a extra smoke to give him, he was mooing. Mocking me. Etc. then when I loose weight people are instantly nicer. It has really made me dislike majority of people.
@@FukaiKokoro Makes you wonder who would be mean to you if you still looked like your old self huh
'Looks aren't everything, it's what's on the I side that counts' it's one of life's fairly tales, just like how you find out Santa isn't real
Whilst it's true that it is what's on this inside that counts the most...what they don't say is that if you're average or below in looks, most people won't care to find out 'what's on the inside'.
Also, constant rejection breaks down what's on the inside, leaving people feeling worthless & wary to express themselves. People can wallow in self pity, ending up a husk of the person they could be.
Great video, thank you for making this! And yes attractiveness is huge, I corrected my prominent ears with an Otoplasty and my whole world has changed. It's sad on how much superficial our world is. I mean if it's to sleep with me, I would understand why you want to find me attractive, but even if you don't at least give me a decent amount of respect. When I didn't have my correction, people were calling me ugly and disrespecting me solely for being not attractive. It's so wrong and sad.
I've literally seen men treat women diffrent, smile at them, be nicer to them, ect. And then they see me and they're all rude lol!!!! So yeah, these people definitely have an advantage
Yeah 😭😭
But then you also have women that will hate you and cause drama if you are attractive. So either way it’s annoying
Me too bitch, me too
Edit: am woman, don’t mean this in an offensive way
Bruh yeah I hate that
@@Andshewasafairy youu, I saw this video of this very beautiful women, they were black and wearing like religious head coverings (hijab?) and beautiful makeup, and one of them rips out the (prettiest girl imo) eyelash and it was so infuriating, all because of jealousy, she had to ruin her friends makeup. And like the closing note of the video was that “your biggest hater is never a stranger”
I was the ugly duckling story... Was fat and uglish until late puberty hit me and started working out... even family members said they couldnt recognize me. it actually bothered me how people treated me differently, made me realize how shallow people are... girls that wouldnt care to look at me suddenly wanted my attention and made me actually even more insecure because I knew it wasnt about "me", only how I looked... its even more rare for somebody to have been on both sides of the coin... its scary how much easier it is to be good looking when in fact as a person I havent changed at all and yet everybody treats me differently...get friends more easily, people offer me help more, im genereal people smile more around me... and actually fucks me up a bit because I know its not because of who I am because I didnt change, only how I look. We see peoples appearances and in our heads we give them a personality based on that, wich is completely wrong.
I feel you. I also have experienced the two sides of the coin, and honestly, at first, it's really infuriating to know that people are reeeaaaally shallow, but later I just learned to cope with it.
Same over here. I try to tell people that this exists.
There's nothing shallow about people rewarding good things like attractiveness.
@@tayzk5929 mmm... Yes, it kinda does, because nobody chooses how attractive he/she borns. Instead everybody have the ability to decide how to behave.
@@sarahfranco6802 most of behavious is genetic and other conditions :D, few people behave because of their concious morality
Speaking as an unattractive actor, I can tell you right now that there is a 100% bias with looks over talent. You can be a less attractive actor but it has to be in a certain way.
Guessing you have to be very funny?
@@rvawildcardwolf2843 that's one way. Or very scary.
“How did this happen Alex?”
“Well, my great great grandfather was traditionally attractive and married my great great grandmother who was traditionally attractive and the ….genes….I guess?”
The cool thing about attractiveness is that it can never be cancelled, because it’s universally praised
Shit ive been playing the game of life on level hard hahahaha
Where are you from?
I checked out your channel, Fabio, and I think you're a cutie, and super talented! Seems like normal mode to me. ;)
You mean it's hard to be cute? Yes.
Then mine's probably on insane difficulty
Being an amazing musician, I didn’t expect you to be so visually impaired sir
I am a black women, and I remember losing a lot of weight, dressing better, and my braces came off. I'm not joking when I say...
- I've had people randomly buy me stuff for no reason.
- I always got free bus passes.
- a random guy gave me 100 dollars for my phone number.
- First dates always paid for.
- I'm considered great even without the person doesn't know me yet.
I'm not even kidding. This all happened when people considered me cute and sexy..I was looked at much more too.
“There was a bit more meat on the bones of females in renaissance art.”
Tbh lots of Renaissance artists basically drew dudes and then went “oh shit, no homo” and added lady parts.
Ever since we started wearing masks I'm getting compliments. Lmaoooo. IT WAS THE NOSE
🤣🤣🤣
Saaame, lol...
The mask hides more than your nose tho. They like your eyes.
I've heard this from so many people all pandemic, whereas I feel like I'm the only person who gets LESS compliments with my mask on lol. Not sure what that says about me, sigh
Maybe you have very striking eyes?
In my social psychology class we discussed how attractive people usually record higher levels of happiness. Why is unclear. Is it because everyone is smiling at them and is looking at them? Do they feel seen, heard, and cared for more than non attractive people. Do they feel like they have more opportunities? Like they are special? Etc etc.
It is a really interesting thing to think about in my opinion.
Is it easier to smile when the world is smiling back at you? Probably...
this is why I am on the fence about *some* plastic surgery being covered by universal health care. I think there is an argument for it.
Perhaps people that are more attractive may have less severe self esteem issues compared to the average person.
@@lapillus2344 that is a good suggestion for sure! People with high self esteem (not talking about narcissists here) usually have reasons for feeling as such - are usually in a position of being respected/loved, having a job they enjoy, having a partner that loves them, enjoying going out with friends etc, etc.
So let’s say they record higher self esteem levels as well... (I don’t know the data on this at all, I would assume you are correct though - and in this case let’s just pretend that is the case based on studies) ...so if that is the case, I want to go deeper into *why* they have higher levels of self esteem would be interesting to me. What about them being attractive increases their likelihood of higher self esteem than the average person.
@@AlizaJayne That would be a good study. It would be good to also measure some other outstanding variables, such as how a higher self esteem raises confidence. As we know, confidence is also a key factor in being more outgoing and ambitious in careers, relationships, etc.
@@lapillus2344 Yes! Very true!!
My guess is that attractive people don't have to worry about being ugly, so that's just one less thing for them to be sad about.
So, from what I gathered from this video, there really are no negatives inherent to being attractive. There's some negatives that stem from certain situations that *might* come about due to your appearance, but being attractive is itself entirely beneficial. Nobody would rather be unattractive than attractive.
I saw the Alex from target trend when it started, and it just disturbed me how the picture was taken without him really knowing and that there was just a whole lot of people on the internet obsessed with him and doing their best to track him down.
Even though I'm not that attractive to get that sort of attention, it still feels like a very scary thing to experience.
I never really knew he was a minor which makes this situation more messed up. Him being a guy doesn't make it okay to do it.
The internet has also made it easier to stalk someone and also normalizes this scary behaviour. It's not a compliment, its a creepy thing to do.
As a person who has been stalked a lot in real life, I can't even imagine how many people must have stalked him online and in real life. This is why I'm more freaked out by this because it just reminds me of my personal experiences. Those experiences have also made it harder for me to step out of my house and I have to literally make sure I have my safety precautions and talk to myself to be able to get out.
Honestly, Alex from target would have looked average to me if he wasn't called attractive. The thing about good looks is that most of the time, they're only enhanced and noticed when mentioned. You're prettier when people call you pretty.
He's average at best mate, I know 10 young brothers that'll make him look like a sick kid from Afghanistan
Moms did this great thing
@@kwamebushman606 pls answer, wtf does that mean?
@@kwamebushman606 wtf type of compliment is that?
What I got from this comment is that YasirBek's standards are so freakishly high that whoever they find attractive must be so good looking anyone standing next to them looks like the hunchback of notre dame in comparison.
Me, having never heard of Alex from Target before today: "Poor kid...he was just doing his job. What a weird thing to have happen."
Yeah poor guy He got to meet Nick Jonas and get millions of girls to drool over him. Wow. So sad 😥
@Sister Void Poor kid, having his right to privacy taken away like that. Poor kid being put on the spotlight out of nowhere because of some weird stranger taking his picture and uploading to the internet for the world to see. Poor kid being displayed like that and having more creeps make comments online about him. Poor kid for having all of that happen to him without his consent. Poor kid just doing his job, minding his business, got fired and his life gets flipped. But yeah, meeting ~NiCk JoNaS~ makes it all better...? Poor kid for that.
Wow yeah i should feel bad for this asshole that got a break in life
@@sistervoid8798 why are you calling him that? Lmao he literally got famous for being cute idiot. He did nothing wrong.
@@sistervoid8798 oh wow sorry I didn’t know you knew him personally. Also you must be of the younger generation (or you’re older just looking for your big break in life) but let me tell you and let me know if it ~blows your mind~ but not everyone wants to be famous. You might have grown up with vine and musically and tik tok and everyone around you has their face stuck to their phone screens (it’s not uncommon given the world we live in now), but not everyone wants to “make it on the internet.” Fame isn’t for everyone. No one cares. People have other aspirations. People enjoy regular life and the value of privacy and doing whatever you want without the world watching you or talking about you on the internet. I’ll say it one more time. Fame isn’t for everyone. Goodbye.
Donna! It’s such a shame I haven’t been caught up on your videos for the past MONTHS. So glad your video made it into the algorithm again. Here begins the binge watching
I'm considered unattractive and I've been treated extremely bad my entire life. You need to make video about how to survive if you're unattractive.
relatable
You say it: "survive". No good life for us😆 sorry
@Ashu Mishra I tried, truly I did, but somehow I always end up ugly again.
@Ashu Mishra Everyone can go to the gym, but there is no gym for people like me to get a more attractive face
@Ashu Mishra I just lose weight but I cant change my facial structure (bones, muscles).
So much of growing up is shaped purely based on the way you look. In high school and college, and even into adulthood, you can get away with having a horrible personality if you have good looks. Unattractive people don't have that luxury.
i thought looks would only matter in dating. imagine how shocked i was when i went to high school and struggled to find friends too??
For some, not having good “looks” to rely on motivates them to work hard to improve themselves and thus be viewed more positively or successful in society in other ways, beyond looks.
@@rpmnh exactly. And then when looks fade attractive people often end up with little to show for themselves. They may have made money off it (yes, being attractive also helps professionally like you wouldn't believe) but often end up unfulfilled and empty.
@@sregan5415 and that is the advantage of not being conventionally attractive- the other aspect of being a human are enhanced because you don’t have attractiveness as a buffer against other shortcomings
Jeff Bezos, the world's richest man (currently) isn't all that attractive in a classic sense, but he can get women. I think his +150 Billion dollars has something to do with it, but that's just a guess. As another person said, looks fade and those who have relied on their looks alone are lost. Also, people's looks change over time. The girl who isn't all that good looking in middle school or high school will surprise the hell out of the guys who rejected her at the 10 or 20 year reunion. That hot jock guy, will very probably have a gut at the 20th reunion. That geeky guy who did JROTC might come in looking like a male fitness model because he joined the military and works out all the time. I saw that first hand at my 20th reunion. A guy I know (no, it's not me) was awkward as hell in high school....his feet and hands were too big for his body and he had no coordination. He joined the Army and eventually went SF (Special Forces/Green Beret). He was 5'10" in high school but grew into 6'4" and he had discovered "weight lifting" and triathlons.
Ask yourself: “do I like him or is he just white with messy brown hair?”
Honestly, i just asked myself that with this one guy, and its just a white guy with brown hair. Thank you, im over him now. I will ask this question now everytime in the future
@@luna-pl8fw glad I could help lol
JAIL.
I have to do this except mine is "person with curly hair and cute smile" or "alluringly androgynous"
What?
Glad I'm not obsessed about being attractive or wanting to be the center of attention. While everything has its pros and cons, I'd hate to have my life under the microscope.
funny story: Alex worked at the target in my town and I used to see him there all the time. he also went to the same high school that I go to now.
I don't hate myself. I actually like myself even if I'm barely passable even with make up. But, the way people treat me makes me realise I've never be loved like a lot of attractive people are and let me tell you, it gets so exhausting to keep loving yourself every day when there's no one to do it for you or remind you when you can't on some days.
I look in the mirror and like what I see
I listen to my recordings and like what I hear ... but other people don’t
@A Wanderer Find your greatest sense of love in Jesus. Attractive people kill themselves every day, because they can't find or see that love. And much of the "love" attractive people get can be of the hollow superficial sort. Like a diet of candy with no nutritional value, it doesn't sustain. Whether a 0 or 10 in the looks department, everyone goes through a struggle to feel secure in love. Do not think this is unique to less conventionally attractive people.
Why would you have the expectation that you should love yourself every day lmfao
@Pi How in the world did you interpret that from my comment?
They ain't loved.
She really did my man Buscemi like that.
In my defense, I google "ugly male actor" and he popped up. He also gets casted for those roles so I thought it'd be fine lol. I'm sorry Steve
@@DonnaIRL Lol, Poor Steve :c I'm sure he appreciates the apology though :p
that was just a poor photo of him. look at other photos of him he is a fine looking fella!
Fucking pathetic. He is also a really nice dude and has immense talent as an actor. Boardwalk Empire all the way
@0 0 y’all need to chill. Steve Buscemi isn’t attractive by societal standards, a lot of people aren’t. Doesn’t mean he’s not crazy talented or that there aren’t people who do find him attractive. I think he’s doing just fine.
Thank god im good looking and i use it in every way possible.
Same
The point about teachers giving more attention to more attractive students is extremely true in my school.
I'm a pretty average looking person so I just go about my day but I noticed that the students who were assigned as group leaders, as prefects, as president of a club were all conventionally attractive people - even though there were clearly other students who were more capable but were seen as 'unattractive'
It might have to do with having an authority position as well, if you’re attractive people are more likely to listen to you. Looks are a part of capability when it comes to leadership.
yeah but then you get less privacy and never signed up for it
I was watching a video similar to this the other day about the different attractive traits between TikTok users, IG Users and actual models that I found interesting too. It's kinda crazy how attractiveness really is a privilege in society and how it can subconsciously change how you treat people. I try and be more mindful of this illusion in my day to day life. Even when buying clothes online sometimes I think I like the clothes when actually the model just looks good lol
EDIT: I binge watched like 10-15 videos the day I saw it and they auto-played so no idea exactly which video it was. I searched my history to see but it wasn't the main part of the actual video and they were all like 15-20 minutes long. Sorry ya'll. The RUclipsrs that I watched were Salem Tovar, Blogilates, Ibrahim Kamit and Salari.
if you don’t mind ofc could i have the link to the video that sounds interesting!!!
please post a link!! I'm curious
who is the youtuber?
Commenting so I get a notification if you post who the you tuber is.
Link?
I find really disturbing that someone took a pic of a good looking stranger, posted on the Internet and other people kept re-twitting with thirsty comments
It happens all the time, this is just one of those times the whole world got to see it. Imagine if this happened on a monthly basis. Crazy world we live in.
Yeah, it's creepy.
the fact that he was underage makes it worse. he was being sexualised before he could even learn to drive a car
Now with COVID no one can tell
@@StillAwesome21 You're right. There are a few Instagram accounts with the sole purpose of posting candid photos of attractive people.
Unpopular opinion: I was ugly/average my whole life and when I glowed up at 18/19 I thought I was happy until I received 10x more sexual harassment and my self esteem hit an all time low. I obsessed about my looks, felt like I would die if gained 5 lbs or became unattractive in anyway. I became addicted to the gratification and it made me majorly depressed and anorexic. I am happy to be attractive to this day, but I am also aware of how little it means in the grand scheme of life and I try to teach others looks don’t matter at all lol
WHY DID YOUR SELF ESTEEM HIT LOW
@@criptik5208 idk I put all my value into being attractive and when I felt like I wasn’t I rly felt like I had nothing.
@@Kawaiicarlybut you dint hit gym or did any extreme diet that sacrificed other part of your lifestyle
@@criptik5208 nah my bone structure just like… came thru? Essentially I was a late bloomer or ugly duckingly or smth like that
@@Kawaiicarly “once my bones come through it’s over for you bitches”
Ah, this video brings me back to the video "Being Ugly: My Experience"
Your closing lines were very true and very motivating.
He’s one of the trainers at my gym and he’s actually a really nice and funny person irl. It’s still creepy as hell that he was exploited like that.
I'm glad he's healthy now 😊💕 and doing well and lovely
Im sure he benefitted financially
Hope so would be stupid if he didnt use god given free stuff
kindly send our regards to alex. hope he's doing fine. thanks
You just think he's nice and funny because he's good looking, halo effect
seriously stop taking photos of people you don't even know without their consent it doesn't matter if you're a girl or a boy it's just plain creepy cut that shit out ffs.
I wish we could all wear masks
Say it louder!👌
exactly. it's disturbing how you could be minding your own business, not knowing your face is on some stranger's phone. i mean bloody hell just look at cool people online or smth
Fr. I had a classmate who would specifically take pictures of white guys she found attractive, whether it were to be on the subway or church. I found it really weird and tbh I think it was a fetish more than anything else. It seemed that as long as they were white, they were attractive.
While in public there is no reasonable expectation of privacy. In public your consent is not required for you to be photographed. With cameras everywhere these days we ought to assume that we are being recorded at any time. Big Brother is watching you and so is little brother. Perhaps it shouldn't be that way. But it is that way.
I liked your point at the end about improving your appearance by improving the way you dress. This can cascade into improved confidence, leading to better performance, potentially leading to an even further boost in perceived attractiveness beyond what just dressing better achieved. The best part is anyone can utilize this technique if they want to, regardless of the way they otherwise look.
I’ve really been enjoying your content! 🙏🏼 Thank you for dropping some solid knowledge on us! ❤️ RUclips finally recommending so beneficial videos!
I remember how netizens were thirsting over a girl who murdered her mother and defending her that she must have been a bad mom yada yada. Also let's not forget the classic example of Ted Bundy, the guy had a huge following just because he was considered attractive.
which girl?
@@user-jw6yh4ev4n her name is Isabella Guzman.
Bro those people gotta get their eyes checked cuz Ted is *UGLY* af
@@cowboyomelet9328 Lmaooo exactly, I never understood the obsession. I guess people back then had less standards. Not only that, but I must be in the minority of people who automatically find someone LESS attractive the more bad/evil they are.
@@ipshita5147 I just looked her up. She is attractive in what way?
This is very in-depth into this topic Donna. Great job!
Lolll I found this today only
Oh wow, I watch your channel a lot. haha
Oh, you guys are here.
Yoooo!
HEY PSYCH2GO
I am a post grad student and I gotta say this is some good research. She used a mixed research method where she took the research paper from the past (qaulitative research method) and did an experiment on her instagram with 2000 participants (qauntitative research method) to prove the Average face attractiveness theory. Impressive!
"If you have money, you can become attractive
If you have power, you can make money "
So you are telling me that when I have kids, they won't look at me? :'(
This made me crack up too much, I just had to pin it 😂
@@DonnaIRL I'm ugly and I'm a lesbian. How can I change my looks to become more attractive?
Haha I had a feeling people were going to ask me for fashion advice after this video. Sorry I’m not an expert in either department 😅
Don't worry, your baby will stare at you as a newborn and you will be beautiful to your baby bc they will associate love and safety with your looks ❤️💙
Your baby will think you’re the most beautiful woman to ever walk the earth. On my worst days, unshowered, wearing raggedy clothes, face a mess, my 3 year old daughter tells me “you’re so pretty mommy” 💕
I noticed that effect very strongly while I was teaching children for a while. When I was wearing make up, wore nice clothes and everything, they were way more interested in what I said and didn't act up as much.
Ironically, I find the opposite to be true. My elementary kids get too distracted when I put a lot of effort into my looks.
When I was a teacher I was told I looked like Ugly Betty 😂
me being told i have an amazing personality by every person who is close to me now and who i genuinely love. but there were times where i was treated different than ppl who were more attractive to me. i tried to be everything she wanted she liked my personality just not like my looks so much, but he didn’t even have to try. he was just there and she found him to be perfect for her and this happened to me so many times. everyday i wish i was attractive .. i’d be good enough to anyone..
Hmmm. Even in the culinary world it is known that we "eat with our eyes first." That is human nature it is not the media.
I think media now is one of the biggest factor how we perceive attractiveness because most people nowadays are much more focused on technology and social media.
I feel the Alex from target situation says more about the power of teenage girls. It's pretty crazy how a lot of attractive Male artists built their careers off of teenagers lol...
sometimes you don't have to be attractive persay. You just need a voice *_ahem_* *corpse husband*
@@idkwhatsmynamelol9281 "per se", but yeah
@@idkwhatsmynamelol9281 an _attractive_ voice not to mention
Hormones🔥
Teenage girls in a group are horrifying. One time I heard the collective thirsty screeching of girls in a mall, I immediately noped to the other direction without bothering to check what the heck is happening.
I can get called attractive because of my hair, eyes and cheekbones by someone, and then horribly harassed because of my teeth, lips, feet, etc. Some people think I'm such an ugly woman that they even misgender me to be a man. Other people think I have features that could be played up to be a model. I have had self esteem issues for a while because of a lot of bullying and being ignored growing up. But because of the mixed messaging, I'm slowly realizing that peoples opinions of me shouldn't really matter that much because none of them are objectively true.
Bro whenever you feel insecure search up kylie jenner before plastic surgery..
Thank me later
Exactly! The only people's whos opinions matter are the ones that love you regardless.
Yeah, acceptance is the best option. But did you watch the whole video, there is unfortunately objective truth. If it didn't exist there would be no such thing as conventional beauty.
Just remember that. in general, people are more concerned about themselves first and foremost.
Yeah it's very weird having the kinda looks that some people consider stunning/beautiful and others clearly not that attractive. It's confusing. 😂 That's why I never truly related to attractive nor unattractive people. I'm the walking example of the subjective nature of attractiveness. 😂
his life changed drastically and he didn't even have any say in it
A woman was booted from the Jury for saying she simply couldn't vote to convict him, on account HE'S TOO GOODLOOKING. True story.
Tik tok is literally pretty privilege / attractive advantage in an app
They have an algorithm to calculate the facial biometrics of people, so yeah you're right
FACTS
@@caid733 for realz?tell me more
@@northernhemisphere4906 google is free
that’s a false notion
Still, there's like a randomness factor, because for every Alex that gets randomly blown up, there's others like him (t.i. similarly attractive) who don't.
True. And if that weird girl didn't decide to take his photo and post it online, Alex would be like those who don't and he'd still have a normal life.
@Iyun Probably, but not with that caption and a friendbase that is probably largely female.
yes, but he still had a shot as an attractive person whereas an unattractive person wouldn't even have a chance
I mean, that’s because he caught on as a Meme
I'm sure, after such a huge population of humans throughout timex there are doppelgangers out there if it's face value at least. Kinda scary, yet nature can't keep making unique faces as much as art and inventions can't be original 100 percent
This is so true.
When I was a freshman in high school, I was over weight and wore a pair of Nike running shorts and got sent to the office over the dress code by my teacher.
My sophomore year, after I lost about 60 pounds, I wore the exact same shorts in the same classroom with the same teacher and she said nothing.
Oof blackpill
I agree except for when they say ugly people are the one that says looks don’t matter. It’s actually attractive people that say it, why? Because they never experienced the shit treatments ugly people go through so they don’t know peoples true colors. Ugly people are actually more aware of this because they can easily see the truth behind people, only problem is people feed us this bs. Moral of the story is , be honest no matter how hard it is . It’ll save then in the long run
I liked most of the video but the end is kinda weird. Atractiveness give a lot more than "slight" advatange. Its a constant boost in the social, personal and professional life. To talk about Alex from target and models as a points about being attractive in general is misleading. Models are surrounded by other models. They are in constant competion for gigs. Its a toxic "work place". And when everyone around you is as pretty as you - then you are no longer "special". But in the real world, where people have real jobs and real social settings - being pretty or handsome gives you HUGE advantage in every aspect of life.
Facts
True. It would be nice to be more attractive but I would never want to be in Hollywood or on the front page of social media.
Go watch some spiritual so. Trust me you will feel better about yourself. It’s not at all about how you look. It’s more about your soul and your Purpose 🗣🍃
@@anpetuwihanhepiwi4262 Spirits are not real.
@@alexforce9 That’s what you think! I have a culture and Ancestors. So I know they are very real. Everything has spirit like, trees rocks rivers! almost every natural being.
Yes. *Everyone remembers the Mugshot Hottie that got discovered and is now a runway model.*
Good old Meeks
Not runway. Model in general, no?
But that’s because people made them famous and kept talking about their looks. These people never went out of their way to make money off their looks. Society and people gave them that by sharing their images and talking about them.
@@meadowc6058 exactlyyyy...
THEY CHOSE TO Give THEM FAME
That was a concious decision
@Sam can you link the video mate
This is so true. Ive always had a conventionally attractive face, but was overweight and always told id be so pretty if skinny. I lost 90 pounds and it was a complete 180 with how men treated me, and women as well. We live in a very vain world.
I do agree with this, though I do find being atractive can be a downside especially in the sense of being a girl and trying to find other friends or in the workplace that is mostly female. We are typically ostracized and I have heard people talking about me all the time. I’m not the type of person to talk about other people, I have great respect for other women and their beauty, Yet it seems that no matter what I do most women judge me as almost a threat? Where is most men see me as a challenge or someone to pursue. It’s definitely not all good
"would your life be better if you were attractive?" I don't need a video to know the answer to this.
pretty much most videos like this nowdays is explaining common knowledge lol
I thought the fact that attractiveness does indeed provide an advantage should already be common sense! Why are we still surprised when we hear it
exactly
People love to deny it still
Cause people keep denying it and accusing you for being bitter and not taking accountability for your failures if you're conventionally ugly
@@Alaois ugh biology is so sexist!
But now that we know pretty people get an advantage so what do we do about it? Like if we are just going to keep complaining then we are just going to waste our own time and become more insecure. So like any solutions on how to get treated equally? If no then there is no use just being sad and crying about it.
Being attractive or blessed with good genes simply makes it a lot easier and less resources required to be successful at things. If you are not, you can usually become attractive, but you need to work out, eat healthy, have good style etc. In other words, it's just a lot of work. Rich people can usually become attractive because they have the available resources to do so. Poor people do not which leads them to not reaching their full potential.
Of course, it's also way easier to become rich if you are attractive. The two greatest advantages of being a human is: 1) - be born in a stable and well to do family. 2) - be attractive.
Our world is definitely not a fair one.
Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos are extremely rich but they are still unattractive. Face you are born with is everything.
I've seen how pretty privilege works in my own life many times.
Especially when I was in dance. I worked super hard and even became the leader of my dance group. My coaches and choreographers constantly told me I was the best dancer on the team and how much I improved but every single year when it came to our annual competition, the best dancer award always went to the prettiest girl on the team. Eventually, I just gave up and quit because I put in a decade of work with very little return. I've seen this happen in many other aspects of my life too, especially in the workforce. Even working in retail, the prettier workers would always get left off easy and their mistakes were more likely to be dismissed than others.