Five months ago I lost my mother and husband both unexpectedly in the same week. I have been told I have complex grief. All I know is two people who meant the world to me are gone, and because I have children who are also in pain life must go on. This is the best explanation of grief I have heard. Thank you for your wisdom.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?
Grief is just one of those things that is so different for everyone but this lady is so right - any motivation, any little bit of house work that gets done... Should be celebrated as win.
It has been 20 years since Chase Daniel left us at 4 1/2 months old. We still have difficulty, but we are able to talk about him and speak about some of the sweet memories we have, though he was with us for a very short time. While the tragedy will never leave us, we are able to keep his little soul alive. He is our personal angel.
I'm so very sorry. There's a beautiful book called Finding The Words by Colin Campbell. I found real comfort in it. You might, too. I will keep you in my prayers.
I lost my husband a month ago. Which seems like eternity, and just a moment. Your talk was remarkable. Thank you! I am going to think of margaritas when I wake up in the morning each day, and wade through my ocean of grief.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?
My mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer too on 8-16-22 n passed 8-31-22 she went fast for that I have peace she didn’t suffer much n went in her sleep but now the pain inside me is so intense
The worst comment I had was to draw a line in the sand so to speak. In other words, after a point in time, just forget about dad and live your life. But my dad was a large part of my life. He's the reason I got back into woodworking because it calmed me down during mums own cancer battle. It helped me feel close to him., which gave me strength
Love the speaker. Thanks for sharing. My wonderful wife passed away four weeks ago. I had cared for her for many years with dementia. Yes I grieved. But my wife is definitely in Heaven enjoying all God’s Blessings. What could be more wonderful than that. She is the lucky one, and I use her inspiration to have myself now helping others in our Community.
Beautiful metaphor, sitting in an ocean to feel her grief, she didn't drown she found peace. Thank you Susan, really appreciated this and very timely for me.
What a superb woman she is, having gone through all this and now helping those of us who struggle. Thank you for your words, your honesty and your understanding.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from..?
So much heart, so much spirit. Incredible talk. She absolutely nailed it, to hear that she did so much good after going through such a challenging time... That's a special kind of lady right there. Damn!!
I saw this on Facebook and watched it here on RUclips. My husband died last year and it has taken a year for the real grief to set in. Your talk was very moving.
My deepest condolences. There's no timeline with grief, it ebbs and flows, some days better, some worse. My husband has been gone 9 years and some days it hurts more than when he first passed. On those days I double my efforts (and my patience!) to push my eldest to continue to achieve. It's a good use of my grief, for him and for me. I will keep ou in my prayers.
My dad passed away on Ash Wednesday this year, and I'm going through a lot of grief. I feel like I'm just here trying to look for answers and help on RUclips. I think this video was very helpful.
It’s been a year and half for me since losing my husband to ductal prostate cancer. She is right people say the dumbest things. Society expects us to get over it and move forward. That’s an impossible expectation to put on anyone drowning in grief. My husband fought so hard for his life I was right by his side in the hardest fight of our lives. He died in my arms in bed in our home just like he wanted. Those of us with faith have many neat packaged comments to make too but all I want to do is scream why? Oh he’s in heaven now. Great but I want him with me! If you’ve taken care of your loved one yourself it’s a shock to stop. What do you do now? Routines are hard to let go of. That constant worry stays with you a long time after. What are the labs the scans the tests the appointments what do we do now???? The entire time being a rock that everything will be ok. Pasting that fake smile on all day and crying alone in the shower late at night. So scared. I’d been on a roller coaster of fear, worry, non stop thinking and researching and praying and begging for a miracle. 2 years the battle consumed me and my husband. It takes time just to let that all go. The second guesses after. The what ifs. Would anything made a difference? You think of all that. I am a jersey girl. Steel is in my veins but losing my husband and best friend of 40 years is by far the hardest thing I’ve ever felt in my life and it’s a struggle to move on without him. One of the doctors told me the second year would be worse than the first. I was convinced nothing could be worse than this but I was wrong. I’m Half way thru the second year it’s been so hard. It may take 2 years it may take the rest of my life but I’m not getting over anything and that’s ok. Loss changes us. We are not the same. Hard to bounce back from this. There is not an expiration date on grief. We find our way thru this journey at different times. And that’s ok.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Yes, the second year is hard. It's all hard. We don't get "over" grief. We just figure out how to navigate with it. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and don't worry about what anyone else has to say. I recall with great clarity the time after my husband's death and the feeling I'd stopped on a dime and didn't know what to do, my routine was gone. Ultimately, I found a new routine, but it took awhile. Be gentle with yourself. I'll be thinking of you.
Beautiful sharing and so true! Those of us who study or work in mental health/grief and loss have learned just what Sue said. That is, there is a sixth stage of grief- making meaning of it all. We can only do that by giving back some of what we have been given by those we have lost. Finding purpose.
One of the best I’ve heared and strucked me. So comforting specially at this time of my raw grief of losing my husband in a sudden and unexpected death. The best advice ever! Hope I can be strong like her after my grief sinks. Thank you for that wonderful and inspiring words, well done and heartily shared.
What a breath of fresh air... Wow. Grief is such an overwhelming emotion, something I feel I've had to deal with too many times... I think I'll need to rewatch it a few times to be able to let go what I've been holding onto... Susan, thank you for this.
My boyfriend died last Friday he was accidentally suffocated by the air conditioning in his car I think you know exactly how I'm feeling I hope you are doing well,I'm not ok Does it ever get better 💔 Because it's painful
How refreshing! I think such a perspective does wonders not just with grief but any pain we feel, any discomfort - what is the lesson, how can we grow and how can we let go. If we practiced such awareness more regularly I dare say humanity wouldn't be riddled with imbalance it currently has. Marvelous talk!
You will move on or get through is the worst phrase one can say to a grieving person. It's just been 6 months since I lost my husband to covid..he was only 36 and I miss him immensely. The loss is huge but as u said...let it simmer to make you do something commendable not for the world but for your ownself. True!
Grief is such a hard one. I know between myself and some friends we have been dealt so many blows these past couple of years and watching how we all process differently has been a real thing. One of the girls actually started making us all talk about it and it's made a huge difference, we all get together in a group now and just tell old stories and I think that it has really helped us to understand and move forward. I really liked this one, she's got some awesome points. Going to send it along.
Thank you for watching, for leaving me such a nice note, and for sharing my talk. I hope you and your friends will continue to tell old stories for a long time to come. Everyone will benefit in many ways.
I applaud this woman for her journey, so beautiful and so apt. Something we all fear, all go through - but how we cope, how we allow ourselves to process - it's so important.
I'm confused devastated I lost my boyfriend last Friday He was 24 he was beautiful inside out smart full of life tender soft everything 💔I miss him so much I'm scared I'll never be happy again I never knew somebody like him Every thing reminds me of him 💔 our car trips our intimate moments when we used to sing together and danse in the car when we smoked when I used to find his car outside waiting for me💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔it's painful
I'm very sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?
Condolences from the bottom of my heart. I can absolutely empathize with deeply loving and losing a person who is extremely unique in so many ways and feeling that nobody could ever replace them. I lost my partner 5 mos ago and I’m still drowning in grief, but getting by day by day. God bless and I pray you’re feeling better. ❤️
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Wonderful Susan thank you for taking time to present this for all of us that need it I got diagnosed with cancer last year my Mom moved in to help support me Few months later she got sick also was stable then slipped through the medical cracks she ended up leaving this world. I am grief stricken we took care of each other 40 days later found my cousin passed in her sleep again like a sister and support. Your talk helped me. I’m doing well and stable. God Bless xo
@@sammie4695 Imagine having nothing better to do with your time than post negative comments on social media? In case you were not aware, it IS ok to JUST KEEP SCROLLING!!!! ;-) I hope your day gets better!!!
Wow this lady is amazing l have a grand daughter 7yearold I'm helping her to read write stories and teaching her another language she's doing well at school I'm so proud of her and my grief is love more give more.
I lost my grandpa,grandma and my dad in the last 7 months I’m really struggling bt this helped me a lot I’m put my grief into helping my children with school and other activities ...
For so long we have been putting our emotions aside, it's such a relief to see this here now though, finally people are opening up. Healing is on its way
It’s almost 2 years since my husband died suddenly. I try to watch this but am in a deep dark place but just can’t. I shut everyone out because no one understands.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Andrew, thank you so very much. That means so very much coming from you! Please feel free to share it with anyone you think can benefit from my message.
I definitely had a bit of a chuckle when she mentioned the part when she felt like she was going to throttle someone if they gave her one more or hug or asked how she was one more time - i went through that, still am going through that. People dont understand that sometimes you just need to be left alone to process. This lady is pretty fantastic. Really enjoyed this.
Ur son is rly lucky to have u. I was diagnosed with autism in my early 20s and if i had a lady like u helping me and showing me the way i feel like things would have gone differently. but u and ur son r very lucky to have each other after all u have been thru.
Ma'am you said it, if I can get out of the bed and get my kids to school on time that's a win. Well I'm starting with just getting them to school. Soon on time..soon with real clothes on. I loaded the dishwasher and wiped the counters.. it's a start. Thank you. I feel understood.
We just lost our Nana a week ago and I am absolutely floored by this explanation of grief... Can't even get the words out proper right now. I'll be sharing this with my family. Thank you.
@@susanmccorkindale5787, Thank you! I lost my husband on Jan 01,2020. Thanks to my husband's journey i became an advocate for Alzheimer's. I have a show,Chatting with Betsy .
@@SusanMcCorkindale I got this Susan, when I lost my partner, I just wanted people to stop telling me how to feel, or tell me I would get over it, I just wanted to mourn and it felt like no-one wanted to let me. Your talk really speaks a truth!!
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
amen Susan. I lost my wife way way too young at 34 due to a chronic lung disease called LAM. We never knew it was as bad as it was. So, it was completely sudden. She died during pregnancy. I now have to raise my daughter without her mom. Thanks for sharing your story.
I related to this so much. It took me years to understand and process the death of my brother but when i finally did I learnt so much about myself, our family and him.
@@AnastasiaCostcalla death of a sibling is like having a huge part of your insides ripped out. I'm sorry you've had this experience. I have as well. I hope you have wonderful memories to reflect on.
Thank you Susan for coming out the other end of such tragedy with such wisdom, this talk helped me more then I can put to words. Thank you thank you. God Bless You
My girlfriend died in 2017, at age 19, and at the beginning of this year, I thought I healed significantly from the loss of her, but it's gotten so much worse, and it's breaking me, and I miss her so bad 💔💔💔 I try to cope so much with it by imagining her with me constantly in all kinds of situations, and sometimes, it makes me feel better, but other times, it's extremely hard...
I'm very sorry to hear this but ask you to be patient with yourself. Have you explored working with a grief counselor? Mine was excellent and not expensive. I will keep you in my prayers.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from..?
It's exactly 10 months since my beloved husband of 44 years passed away and 2 years in December my younger sister passed away. I don't have any children. I don't enjoy anybody's company although my nephews love me and want me to spend time with them. I talk if anybody calls me but just want to be left alone. I spend most of my time watching anything to do with grief on you tube and videos about how to overcome loss of your loved ones. Removing his name from bank accounts and the house as we had everything in joint names is very painful. Now I have to do all the jobs he used to do. It's hard.
You are so loved. I am so sorry for your tremendous losses. I lost my partner Glenn a month ago and I am completely shattered. Like you, I’ve been absorbing all I can regarding grief and an afterlife. Sending you so much strength and a big hug.
@@SUJAMUK I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
@@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb I am living in india now. Came back to India for good after spending most of our lives in England. Nothing went according to plan. Here I am all by myself.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Working on this grief thing I’ve lost a lot of relatives and I’ve lost friends but my wife passed away. It had taken us 60 years to find each other after marriages defined each other and I made the decision to be with her forever even though she warned me she had congestive heart failure so what!!!! 68 I never expected to be struggling as hard as I am I missing someone so much but you’re right!! I need to use her loss to me and do something. Unfortunately it makes it even more difficult it’s her mother and stepfather are still alive in their late 80s stepfather and her mother is Mid90s the worst thing about losing is when no one and I mean zero from that side of the family does anything or acknowledges anything there is no help there was no help there was no one to talk to I’m into this going on two years I’ve got a find a route make myself Feel human again. I can feel her presence each time I walk to the house walk down the sidewalk in the back to the garage I never dreamed my life with and be in this state at my age what are you do?????
Greg, sounds like your wife was the love of your life. I'm so very sorry for your loss. You and she were lucky to find each other and to have each other for as long as you did. I know you know that. As for your in-laws, people can't give you what they don't have. Have you considered looking into a grief support group? If that doesn't appeal to you, maybe some volunteering would. It's a good way to get out of the house and it will give you folks to talk to and things to talk about. Whatever you decide, I'll be keeping you in my prayers.
I lost the love of my life. We had a conflicted relationship. I have so many regrets. I don't want to be in a world without him. But I have to fight to stay here because my pets are counting on me to take care of them..I have a systemic fungal infection and had a stroke two weeks ago with a blot clot in my leg and I haven't received adequate medical care. I don't even understand how I am still here. But I am.Ive decided to fight to stay alive for my pets and instead of despairing like I have been for especially the last two weeks, but also since my partner/best friend Rusty passed away on Feb 7th. And even before that, I found reasons to despair. . I'm not going to allow my grief and despair and worry to stop me from trying to get through this nightmare. I must still be here for some purpose other than crying about how unfair and tragic that my rescued pets will find themselves homeless and vulnerable once again and how cruel life is. I'm still here. Today i managed to initiate the crucial projects that I have not been able to think about because I have felt crushed under a mountain of stress, fear, worry, sadness and hopelessness. It required me to order myself to stop procrastinating, immediately after I had just rationalized why it would be best to start, right after one more cigarwtte
Thanks Susan you have given me a Way to channel my grief I love to cook so that is the way to channel my grief getting through the holidays is the first hurdle Christmas was are holiday
Five months ago I lost my mother and husband both unexpectedly in the same week. I have been told I have complex grief. All I know is two people who meant the world to me are gone, and because I have children who are also in pain life must go on. This is the best explanation of grief I have heard. Thank you for your wisdom.
Thank you for sharing. I am moved and share your pain. I am holding you in my thoughts and heart. What's left of it.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?
We will never meet but please know you are loved. I love you. Peace.
Grief is just one of those things that is so different for everyone but this lady is so right - any motivation, any little bit of house work that gets done... Should be celebrated as win.
Thank you.
🙋🏿♀️🎉👏🏿 Yes
It has been 20 years since Chase Daniel left us at 4 1/2 months old. We still have difficulty, but we are able to talk about him and speak about some of the sweet memories we have, though he was with us for a very short time. While the tragedy will never leave us, we are able to keep his little soul alive. He is our personal angel.
I'm so sorry, Sylvia. xo
Grief can be the most transforming and humbling thing to go through. I loved the way Susan told her story... Kind of magic. Beautiful.
Thank you very much, Arnold!
losing someone I loved so so much humbled me beyond belief. I learned a very very hard lesson.
My daughter died and I'm having a hard time functioning very well. Thank you for sharing that
I'm so very sorry. There's a beautiful book called Finding The Words by Colin Campbell. I found real comfort in it. You might, too. I will keep you in my prayers.
"We don't move on from our grief, we move forward with it."
I lost my husband a month ago. Which seems like eternity, and just a moment.
Your talk was remarkable. Thank you!
I am going to think of margaritas when I wake up in the morning each day, and wade through my ocean of grief.
🙏🏿🤗
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?
My mom was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer too on 8-16-22 n passed 8-31-22 she went fast for that I have peace she didn’t suffer much n went in her sleep but now the pain inside me is so intense
Awesome talk. After dealing with multiple losses in just one year I am still looking for HOW to navigate my days. You've given a path to take.
The most important thing in any loss or change to living, is to feel the pain you are feeling when you're feeling it.
The worst comment I had was to draw a line in the sand so to speak. In other words, after a point in time, just forget about dad and live your life. But my dad was a large part of my life. He's the reason I got back into woodworking because it calmed me down during mums own cancer battle. It helped me feel close to him., which gave me strength
No one should ever suggest such a thing. Keep your dad in your heart as you move forward, and he will help you be strong and find joy.
Love the speaker. Thanks for sharing.
My wonderful wife passed away four weeks ago. I had cared for her for many years with dementia. Yes I grieved. But my wife is definitely in Heaven enjoying all God’s Blessings. What could be more wonderful than that. She is the lucky one, and I use her inspiration to have myself now helping others in our Community.
You're a good man and you were obbviously a wonderful husband. Your community is lucky to have you!
You got to take care of yourself first so you can be whole to help others.
You do, Randi. Thank for watching and commenting.
so important for us all to know
Beautiful metaphor, sitting in an ocean to feel her grief, she didn't drown she found peace. Thank you Susan, really appreciated this and very timely for me.
Thank you, Geena.
What a superb woman she is, having gone through all this and now helping those of us who struggle. Thank you for your words, your honesty and your understanding.
Thank you so very much. I appreciate you watching and leaving me a note!
We don't do anything good with our grief until we allow it in? wow that hit home!
Thank you. I'm glad it resonated with you!
I’ve been busying myself since my hubby passed 4 years ago. I’m exhausted too. Trying to “grieve” during covid ...Thanks for sharing your energy.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from..?
I lost 3 family members in the last 2 years to this awful disease, thank you for speaking out!
i feel you man, hope you're alright
I have no words. I am just in awe of this woman and everyone else who has experienced such trauma.
I love that, being still. Lovely talk.
Thank you Sherrie!
I did too
that is a perfect state isnt it!
sorphea love indeed it is!
Being still, it's a gift.
So much heart, so much spirit. Incredible talk. She absolutely nailed it, to hear that she did so much good after going through such a challenging time... That's a special kind of lady right there. Damn!!
Thank you, Chris!
I saw this on Facebook and watched it here on RUclips. My husband died last year and it has taken a year for the real grief to set in. Your talk was very moving.
My deepest condolences. There's no timeline with grief, it ebbs and flows, some days better, some worse. My husband has been gone 9 years and some days it hurts more than when he first passed. On those days I double my efforts (and my patience!) to push my eldest to continue to achieve. It's a good use of my grief, for him and for me. I will keep ou in my prayers.
I lost my wife in 2018 to cancer, I don't think I will feel whole again.
@@SusanMcCorkindale Thank you Susan you speak for many of us I see.
@@oscarnotreallyawiener I'm so very sorry for your loss.
I saw this today, brought back sad memories of losing my sister, but also good ones. I think we dont forget things that are important.
The comments I hate is when people tell me that I have all the memories of my wife. It's those 39 years of memories that haunt me every single day.
My dad passed away on Ash Wednesday this year, and I'm going through a lot of grief. I feel like I'm just here trying to look for answers and help on RUclips. I think this video was very helpful.
It’s been a year and half for me since losing my husband to ductal prostate cancer. She is right people say the dumbest things. Society expects us to get over it and move forward. That’s an impossible expectation to put on anyone drowning in grief. My husband fought so hard for his life I was right by his side in the hardest fight of our lives. He died in my arms in bed in our home just like he wanted. Those of us with faith have many neat packaged comments to make too but all I want to do is scream why? Oh he’s in heaven now. Great but I want him with me! If you’ve taken care of your loved one yourself it’s a shock to stop. What do you do now? Routines are hard to let go of. That constant worry stays with you a long time after. What are the labs the scans the tests the appointments what do we do now???? The entire time being a rock that everything will be ok. Pasting that fake smile on all day and crying alone in the shower late at night. So scared. I’d been on a roller coaster of fear, worry, non stop thinking and researching and praying and begging for a miracle. 2 years the battle consumed me and my husband. It takes time just to let that all go. The second guesses after. The what ifs. Would anything made a difference? You think of all that. I am a jersey girl. Steel is in my veins but losing my husband and best friend of 40 years is by far the hardest thing I’ve ever felt in my life and it’s a struggle to move on without him. One of the doctors told me the second year would be worse than the first. I was convinced nothing could be worse than this but I was wrong. I’m Half way thru the second year it’s been so hard. It may take 2 years it may take the rest of my life but I’m not getting over anything and that’s ok. Loss changes us. We are not the same. Hard to bounce back from this. There is not an expiration date on grief. We find our way thru this journey at different times. And that’s ok.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Yes, the second year is hard. It's all hard. We don't get "over" grief. We just figure out how to navigate with it. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself, and don't worry about what anyone else has to say. I recall with great clarity the time after my husband's death and the feeling I'd stopped on a dime and didn't know what to do, my routine was gone. Ultimately, I found a new routine, but it took awhile. Be gentle with yourself. I'll be thinking of you.
This talk really got me, tapped into some real emotions about my sisters death, thank you Susan 🥰 😘
I'm so very sorry for your loss. I appreciate you watching and commenting.
Agree 10000%
@@thisisjustright thank you!
@@susanmccorkindale5787 appreciate that and your talk, thank you
Emma Smythe you’re so very welcome!
Beautiful sharing and so true! Those of us who study or work in mental health/grief and loss have learned just what Sue said. That is, there is a sixth stage of grief- making meaning of it all. We can only do that by giving back some of what we have been given by those we have lost. Finding purpose.
I couldn't agree more. Thank you for sharing that here. It will certainly help others.
One of the best I’ve heared and strucked me. So comforting specially at this time of my raw grief of losing my husband in a sudden and unexpected death. The best advice ever! Hope I can be strong like her after my grief sinks. Thank you for that wonderful and inspiring words, well done and heartily shared.
What a breath of fresh air... Wow. Grief is such an overwhelming emotion, something I feel I've had to deal with too many times... I think I'll need to rewatch it a few times to be able to let go what I've been holding onto... Susan, thank you for this.
Leo, thank you for your note. What a lovely surprise to find it today. Stay well. Susan
i came here to say this!! she's so awesome!! i mean.. i cried..but happy tears in a way i think.
Trust Factor thank you so very much!
@@trustfactornow thank you so very much!
@@SusanMcCorkindale you are very welcome, you talk was wonderful!
I am in tears. I lost my boyfriend to suicide just four months ago. This is so spot on and so incredibly powerful. Thank you so much for sharing
I am so sorry for this terrible loss you have been through ❤
@@amyfloren4581 Thank you so sincerely much💜
My boyfriend died last Friday he was accidentally suffocated by the air conditioning in his car
I think you know exactly how I'm feeling I hope you are doing well,I'm not ok
Does it ever get better 💔
Because it's painful
@@user-ll1wj8eh3y OH No sorry to hear about your lost!❤
Darling, I am so sorry for your loss. I feel your pain - I lost my fiancee to suicide 2 months ago. Now just Trying to see the light in the tunnel.
How refreshing! I think such a perspective does wonders not just with grief but any pain we feel, any discomfort - what is the lesson, how can we grow and how can we let go. If we practiced such awareness more regularly I dare say humanity wouldn't be riddled with imbalance it currently has. Marvelous talk!
Leslie, thank you. I so appreciate you watching and leaving me such a thoughtful note.
You will move on or get through is the worst phrase one can say to a grieving person. It's just been 6 months since I lost my husband to covid..he was only 36 and I miss him immensely. The loss is huge but as u said...let it simmer to make you do something commendable not for the world but for your ownself. True!
Grief is such a hard one. I know between myself and some friends we have been dealt so many blows these past couple of years and watching how we all process differently has been a real thing. One of the girls actually started making us all talk about it and it's made a huge difference, we all get together in a group now and just tell old stories and I think that it has really helped us to understand and move forward. I really liked this one, she's got some awesome points. Going to send it along.
Thanks Gabe
Thank you for watching, for leaving me such a nice note, and for sharing my talk. I hope you and your friends will continue to tell old stories for a long time to come. Everyone will benefit in many ways.
@@charlottewebbnotthebook thank you for watching. I'm so happy you enjoyed it!
Lovely stories from a father who loses his mother and creates her best recipes for her grand children and his children, filled with loving memories.
Glad you enjoyed it @Nancy Groskonski
This made me cry, such an amazing Ted talk. Thank you Susan, such smart kind words for all of us, as we will all face this.
Thank you Regina!
@@SusanMcCorkindale thank you this was so beautiful.
Amazing woman.
@@snakejohnson2740 thank you!
Me too. I lost my husband a year ago and also went through phase of being so busy. But what really helps is to take moments and let it wash over you
We hold onto pain for as long as it serves us, when we learn it doesn't anymore we stop.
I applaud this woman for her journey, so beautiful and so apt. Something we all fear, all go through - but how we cope, how we allow ourselves to process - it's so important.
Thank you Phoebe.
I really don't like when people say.. You got to get over it and move on.. You gotta live life.. Well yeah but I gotta do it in my time.
When it comes to grief, everyone handles it differently and in their own time. Thank you for watching and leaving me a comment.
I'm confused devastated
I lost my boyfriend last Friday
He was 24 he was beautiful inside out smart full of life tender soft everything 💔I miss him so much I'm scared I'll never be happy again I never knew somebody like him
Every thing reminds me of him 💔 our car trips our intimate moments when we used to sing together and danse in the car when we smoked when I used to find his car outside waiting for me💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔it's painful
I'm so very sorry for your loss. 24 is far too young.
I'm very sorry about your loss, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?
Condolences from the bottom of my heart. I can absolutely empathize with deeply loving and losing a person who is extremely unique in so many ways and feeling that nobody could ever replace them.
I lost my partner 5 mos ago and I’m still drowning in grief, but getting by day by day.
God bless and I pray you’re feeling better. ❤️
Thank you Susan, I sure went through some memories. I lost my partner too, enough said except thank you again.
My condolences, Jodi. Treasure your memories and take good care of yourself.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Wonderful Susan thank you for taking time to present this for all of us that need it
I got diagnosed with cancer last year my Mom moved in to help support me
Few months later she got sick also was stable then slipped through the medical cracks she ended up leaving this world. I am grief stricken we took care of each other
40 days later found my cousin passed in her sleep again like a sister and support. Your talk helped me. I’m doing well and stable. God Bless xo
Now this is raw, real talk, great speaker.
Thank you so very much, John!
Thank you so much!
She speaks with such love, passion and pain.
Thank you Emma!
YOU are a great speaker and you f*cking NAILED THIS!!!!!! Great job!!!
Ben , thank you so much!
1000% agreed
Why do people always have to use the "F" word, even in your comment on such a sensitive subject as this. No one has any CLASS anymore.
@@sammie4695 Imagine having nothing better to do with your time than post negative comments on social media? In case you were not aware, it IS ok to JUST KEEP SCROLLING!!!! ;-) I hope your day gets better!!!
Look BENNIE, you didn't "keep scrolling". I stand by my comment.If the shoe fits Wear It!
Wow this lady is amazing l have a grand daughter 7yearold I'm helping her to read write stories and teaching her another language she's doing well at school I'm so proud of her and my grief is love more give more.
Thank you, Laurie.
Thank you. Your granddaughter is lucky to have you!
I was once advised to not only grieve but to grieve well.
I lost my grandpa,grandma and my dad in the last 7 months I’m really struggling bt this helped me a lot I’m put my grief into helping my children with school and other activities ...
For so long we have been putting our emotions aside, it's such a relief to see this here now though, finally people are opening up. Healing is on its way
I really believe this as well, more and more people are seeking therapy and looking for ways to let go!
Thank you so much for wacthing.
@@geenaremsby thank you so much for watching.
It’s almost 2 years since my husband died suddenly. I try to watch this but am in a deep dark place but just can’t. I shut everyone out because no one understands.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
beautifully moving talk
Andrew, thank you so very much. That means so very much coming from you! Please feel free to share it with anyone you think can benefit from my message.
Thank you. Beautiful
Thank you, Lee.
i've always stood by the fact that some of the greatest pain we will ever feel will lead to the most growth... well, at least for most of us.
"for most of us" ....yep, some of us have a real problem with letting go
I agree. It takes time, but if the individual is open to it, it will happen. Thank you for watching.
I definitely had a bit of a chuckle when she mentioned the part when she felt like she was going to throttle someone if they gave her one more or hug or asked how she was one more time - i went through that, still am going through that. People dont understand that sometimes you just need to be left alone to process. This lady is pretty fantastic. Really enjoyed this.
Just 4 Me Thank you for watching and for the kind words. Take care of you!
I lost my wife same way, that you Susan, thank you so much!!
Andrew Silas I’m so very sorry for your loss. Thank you for leaving me a note. I’m glad my talk resonated with you!
Sorry for your loss
Hope you found comfort in this wonderful talk as I did.
What an enlightened and beautiful human being! I am better for having heard these words of wisdom. Thank you!
So wise! So grateful for this talk
Thank you so very much!
@@aleidbarend thank you!
Ur son is rly lucky to have u. I was diagnosed with autism in my early 20s and if i had a lady like u helping me and showing me the way i feel like things would have gone differently. but u and ur son r very lucky to have each other after all u have been thru.
pierre martinetto Thank you for your kind words. Please take care of yourself.
Ma'am you said it, if I can get out of the bed and get my kids to school on time that's a win. Well I'm starting with just getting them to school. Soon on time..soon with real clothes on. I loaded the dishwasher and wiped the counters.. it's a start. Thank you. I feel understood.
Those words, 'you'll get through it' dismiss everything you're feeling at the time.
I don't think we 'get over it', I feel we just learn to adapt our lives to carry on but know it's still just a part of the new way of life
We just lost our Nana a week ago and I am absolutely floored by this explanation of grief... Can't even get the words out proper right now. I'll be sharing this with my family. Thank you.
Tim McKinley My sincere condolences on the loss of your Nana. I’m glad you found my talk helpful.
@@SusanMcCorkindale That's nice of you Susan, thanks for reaching out.
I loved this talk!
I am also a Jersey Gal!
Yes,I am using my grief to help others !
Thank you, Betsy! Once a Jersey Girl, always a Jersey Girl. Stay well!
@@susanmccorkindale5787,
Thank you!
I lost my husband on Jan 01,2020.
Thanks to my husband's journey i became an advocate for Alzheimer's.
I have a show,Chatting with Betsy .
What an emotional and heartfelt talk, how true. Thank you for your grace Susan
Thank you for your lovely words. I appreciate you watching!
Thanks for sharing Susan. Great story of turning grief into amazing things.
Thank you, Laura. I so appreciate you watching and sharing to spread the message to those you need it.
It is.
@@SusanMcCorkindale I got this Susan, when I lost my partner, I just wanted people to stop telling me how to feel, or tell me I would get over it, I just wanted to mourn and it felt like no-one wanted to let me. Your talk really speaks a truth!!
@@sienaredders thank you. I'm very sorry for the loss of your partner!
We hurt because it means so much, we heal because we are worth it!
I love that, Sonthi! Thank you!!
@@SusanMcCorkindale you are such a good speaker!
@@sonthibutsalee thank you so very much!
Wonderful, widowed 4 months and trying to find my way.
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
amen Susan. I lost my wife way way too young at 34 due to a chronic lung disease called LAM. We never knew it was as bad as it was. So, it was completely sudden. She died during pregnancy. I now have to raise my daughter without her mom. Thanks for sharing your story.
Processing a death is living with death, a soulful disfunction of sorrow and path to recovery that can sometimes take a life time.
Agreed Ron. Bless you!
Thank you
Thank you for watching and leaving a comment!
What a beautiful talk, and so gentle. You are a great mom.
Thank you so very much, Billie Jean!
@@susanmccorkindale5787 you are very welcome, wonderful talk that all those facing this should see...
@@billiejeanbrasier thank you so very much. Have a wonderful day and take care of yourself.
Amazing lady. I´m still giving lifts in my pyjamas but there is hope now.
I related to this so much. It took me years to understand and process the death of my brother but when i finally did I learnt so much about myself, our family and him.
Yeah I feel you man, it's such a hard thing to deal with
When my sister passed away it took me at least 8 years to get over it. I totally understand.
Losing a sibling is heartbreaking. I lost one of my brothers a few years ago. I miss him every day. Take care of yourself.
@@AnastasiaCostcalla death of a sibling is like having a huge part of your insides ripped out. I'm sorry you've had this experience. I have as well. I hope you have wonderful memories to reflect on.
Thank you Susan for coming out the other end of such tragedy with such wisdom, this talk helped me more then I can put to words. Thank you thank you. God Bless You
My girlfriend died in 2017, at age 19, and at the beginning of this year, I thought I healed significantly from the loss of her, but it's gotten so much worse, and it's breaking me, and I miss her so bad 💔💔💔 I try to cope so much with it by imagining her with me constantly in all kinds of situations, and sometimes, it makes me feel better, but other times, it's extremely hard...
I'm very sorry to hear this but ask you to be patient with yourself. Have you explored working with a grief counselor? Mine was excellent and not expensive. I will keep you in my prayers.
My husband just die December 14 2020 in his job we was together since 1980 till 2020 I missing him a lot
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from..?
You couldn't get over it you live with it thinking about them everyday
I could feel this, and those tools are going to help many, thank you Susan!
Bella Santa Rosa thank you! I hope they do!
yeah... really. wow.
Tim McKinley thank you 😊
Powerful beautiful story, good people do great things.
Thank you, Jean. I appreciate you watching and leaving me a note!
It's exactly 10 months since my beloved husband of 44 years passed away and 2 years in December my younger sister passed away. I don't have any children. I don't enjoy anybody's company although my nephews love me and want me to spend time with them. I talk if anybody calls me but just want to be left alone. I spend most of my time watching anything to do with grief on you tube and videos about how to overcome loss of your loved ones. Removing his name from bank accounts and the house as we had everything in joint names is very painful. Now I have to do all the jobs he used to do. It's hard.
You are so loved. I am so sorry for your tremendous losses. I lost my partner Glenn a month ago and I am completely shattered. Like you, I’ve been absorbing all I can regarding grief and an afterlife. Sending you so much strength and a big hug.
@@Prettymapleleaf thank you. Nice to know that there is someone who understands. Sorry for your loss..
@@SUJAMUK it’s okay to feel all that you are feeling. Flow with your grief and you move on WITH them. ❤️
@@SUJAMUK I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
@@ChrisJohnson-lh9qb I am living in india now. Came back to India for good after spending most of our lives in England. Nothing went according to plan. Here I am all by myself.
This is the perspective I needed right now. Fantastic speaker and even better topic. A lot of helpful tools here.
pretty amazing human!
Thank you so very much!
Love never ends so the grief never ends...u just learn to live with...thats it
Thank you, I will going through this soon as my husband is near the end of life……
I'm so very sorry.
After my dads and nephews deaths, I became a nurse.
I lost my husband on Christmas... I feel so broken..
I'm very sorry about your husband, trust me I completely understand how you feel, I felt the same way when my wife past away June 4th 2018 grief is hard to deal with but we learn to live with it, where are you from ?.
Recycling her grief into helping her family♥️♥️♥️♥️. God bless you ! I love that idea and I’m going to try it , I kinda feel it working already….
Out of something bad comes something good.
Yes. If we allow it! Thank you for watching.
Thank you Susan for sharing your story. It was inspiring and gave me hope. All my best to you.
This was exactly what I needed to hear
Bravo! kudos to this brave woman👍
Thank you!
Wow. I needed this more than I realised.
Thank you for watching.
love the name of this talk and everything that it is. what a beautiful way to process grief!
Sheila Lindsay Thank you for watching and leaving me a comment!
Beautiful and compassionate talk, thank you.
Thank you for watching and commenting!
@@SusanMcCorkindale Thanks for giving the talk Susan, means a lot to me right now.
@@lestnewman You're very welcome, Les.
Thank you for sharing your story. This helped me a lot I now know how to handle my grief and I am looking forward to my new journey.
I am a twin, I lost my brother when we were 11 in accident. My mother was never the same.I wish she had heard this...
Losing a sibling is devastating and losing a child is the ultimate tragedy. I’m so very sorry for your family’s loss.
@@SusanMcCorkindale Thank you very much, truth is I hurt, I always ignore twin theory but I do feel something is missing with me too.
@@riddermartijn the twin theory is real. I know several sets of twins and their bond runs deep. Be kind to yourself.
i'm so sorry to hear that
The dislikes were from people who can't feel!
I like that reasoning! Thank you!
Working on this grief thing I’ve lost a lot of relatives and I’ve lost friends but my wife passed away. It had taken us 60 years to find each other after marriages defined each other and I made the decision to be with her forever even though she warned me she had congestive heart failure so what!!!! 68 I never expected to be struggling as hard as I am I missing someone so much but you’re right!! I need to use her loss to me and do something. Unfortunately it makes it even more difficult it’s her mother and stepfather are still alive in their late 80s stepfather and her mother is Mid90s the worst thing about losing is when no one and I mean zero from that side of the family does anything or acknowledges anything there is no help there was no help there was no one to talk to I’m into this going on two years I’ve got a find a route make myself Feel human again. I can feel her presence each time I walk to the house walk down the sidewalk in the back to the garage I never dreamed my life with and be in this state at my age what are you do?????
Greg, sounds like your wife was the love of your life. I'm so very sorry for your loss. You and she were lucky to find each other and to have each other for as long as you did. I know you know that. As for your in-laws, people can't give you what they don't have. Have you considered looking into a grief support group? If that doesn't appeal to you, maybe some volunteering would. It's a good way to get out of the house and it will give you folks to talk to and things to talk about. Whatever you decide, I'll be keeping you in my prayers.
Thank you for sharing your story, it's one of those ones that really gives me some perspective in my own life.
And thank you, Charlotte, for watching and leaving me a note!
@@SusanMcCorkindale Your talk is so in tune with what happens inside us, thank you!
Lost my wife last year, still hard, really hard.
I'm so very sorry for your loss. Be patient with yourself. Some days will be hard.
Bless You Susan!!!
And you, Samuel!!
I lost the love of my life. We had a conflicted relationship. I have so many regrets. I don't want to be in a world without him. But I have to fight to stay here because my pets are counting on me to take care of them..I have a systemic fungal infection and had a stroke two weeks ago with a blot clot in my leg and I haven't received adequate medical care. I don't even understand how I am still here. But I am.Ive decided to fight to stay alive for my pets and instead of despairing like I have been for especially the last two weeks, but also since my partner/best friend Rusty passed away on Feb 7th. And even before that, I found reasons to despair. . I'm not going to allow my grief and despair and worry to stop me from trying to get through this nightmare. I must still be here for some purpose other than crying about how unfair and tragic that my rescued pets will find themselves homeless and vulnerable once again and how cruel life is. I'm still here. Today i managed to initiate the crucial projects that I have not been able to think about because I have felt crushed under a mountain of stress, fear, worry, sadness and hopelessness. It required me to order myself to stop procrastinating, immediately after I had just rationalized why it would be best to start, right after one more cigarwtte
Thanks Susan you have given me a Way to channel my grief
I love to cook so that is the way to channel my grief getting through the holidays is the first hurdle Christmas was are holiday