JUST RETURNING AFTER ONE YEAR. WENT NO CONTACT, SHE REACHED OUT AND NOW WERE TOGETHER AND STRONGER THAN EVER. WANT TO GIVE A SINCERE THANK YOU, COACH LEE.
No contact is strong, but please don't do like me and use it only to get your ex back. Stop checking their socials and unfriend them if it makes you feel better. Just try to work on yourself and try to slowly move on. Meet new people and rewrite your own narrative without them in it. The right person will come back eventually, but please don't pause your life and wait for it.
Thanks for saying it so well. Im wishing I’d never crossed those lines from friends to lovers regardless I was supposed to fall in love with my “best friend”.
If someone breaks up with you, don’t even reply. Go no contact as soon as possible and give them what they think they want….which is no more “you”…….trust me.. most of the time, this abrupt action will spark their curiosity and THEY will reach out. But, when they do…really ask yourself if THEY are what YOU really want. You made it this far, after all!
Such good advice. Relationships are meant to be safe places and the way some of these people have ditched us is not safe. Do we really need that instability in our lives?
I overpursued and then I pushed her away into the arms of another man. This happened over Holidays. She still wanted to be friends but I refused and told her I want romance only or nothing at all. The reality is that I still love her a lot. However like other's have said before, why should I be her backup plan if she does come back. It's always going to be a feeling of second option. I know I deserve better along with anyone else who has been cheated on, or used. Waiting for someone or taking someone back never ends well! I found out the hard way and it's a lesson I will never forget.
I agree, don't hold on to hope they'll return... Nothing is guaranteed in life and You can always count on impertinence! Accept the change in a positive way and work on your own happiness, stay strong, regain your peace, amen🙏
Been in a NC for almost 1 week now. Proud of myself for letting it be a clean break. No argument, no accusations, no pleading, no defending; just simply accepting his decision and telling him "it's okay, i'll be fine.. i dont want to stay friends".. been going to gym 3 times in the last week and watching a lot of coaching video's to stay strong.. its been only a week.. but i will be doing just fine
So, basically I fucked up.. he did come back very carefully.. sending me memes on instagram privately and very short conversations. Fun, but very briefly. But sooooo slow! I over-invested and in an impulsive moment I felt I just wanted him back in my life; even if it's just friends.. so I asked him to call me because I deleted his number.. he called me instantly and we talked for like 2 hours on the phone.. me replying my point of view as I didnt really do that when he broke up. But it was an overall pleasant conversation. But he wasnt there where he needed to be... yet.... And then last saturday I went out with friends, had a little bit too much wine and got frisky after he send me a flirtatious text.. I asked him to come and pick me up and we had a very passionate night together. But in the days after it more felt like a bootycall. So yesterday I send him a message saying we really cant do friends apparently... and that despite me having enjoyed saturdaynight a lot, its not what i want to settle for with him and that it makes it impossible for me to move on this way.. that i feel we are a very good match together and I do want to make it work with him... that all issues he had, are things we could have worked out. That all that was needed is us being willing to make it work..but that our issue is that he doesnt want to, so there is no point. And now I restarted my no-contact.... first 24 hours are done.... I really messed it up by wanting to go too fast! Like.. I do feel there still was no pleading and begging... and there still were no arguments or bad moments.. and I do feel I said things that could really make him re-think his decision and choice.. but I feel I also messed up badly by being too eager. I dont know I will get him back now.. kinda feel like i won't...😢
I have used the no contact rule the minute I split with my ex. It was hard but I stuck to it. Not only did I heal at my own pace but I healed so much that I started attracting those around me. A year and somewhat later, I met someone else and I have never been so happy. It works when you believe in yourself enough in relation to removing yourself in a place that no longer serves you.
@@shirleybragat2773 yes she did, every single day. Constant phone calls and text messages. Even tried to talk to me through various social media platforms. I guess in the end the no contact worked for me because I had no expectations. I let time do it’s thing and it gave me a clear vision of what I wanted and needed in life. Granted no contact works if you want them back, but it could also work when you’re ready to heal and move forward. Only you can decide what’s best for you.
My ex contacted me 2 days ago, we had a good talk...she said at the end that she had realised what i have done for her in our entire 6 year relationship, she was impulsive , and now she is understanding as she is getting mature...she apologized...it took her 6 months... Thanks for your advice and all the amazing videos... For now, i have made her clear that my entire focus is building my career... I just want to say to all those souls who are suffering..."be strong, identify your value, focus on your career, as your career will not betray you" ...
@@missmania4561 Hang in there, im almost a week in. It sucks it really does. Keep this in mind though, every day that goes by, you get stronger and they actually get weaker if you stay in no contact whatsoever. These stages in the video do actually happen. When this person comes back, make sure you have the high ground.
We went no contact for a long period of time. He came back, we are stronger than ever!! I used to be here listening to this videos every single day and all I can say is trust the process! You either heal from it or it makes you guys stronger either way it’s a win win 😊👍🏽
@@moytheboytech616 I've been in NC for a little over 2 months. And I'm right there with you. Some days/nights are hard as hell but I always come back to these videos and comments to give me encouragement and hope. Just keep going and improving yourself! You're not alone in this
hopewanjiru5560, Coach Lee is very proud of you both. He has a Workshop which he and I recommend you join. It's excellent and it has EVERYTHING you need to know about yourself and so much more.know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.
I’m happy for you both! This did not work in my case. I reached out after a year of us being broken up and within that time 8 months of NC. And his poor choices led me to breaking up with him again and walking away for good this time. There are no third chances not when he hasn’t shown me he’s changed and worked on his issues. It’s heartbreaking but I know my worth. Wishing you the best! ❤
So sad all these people who pour in so much love are just discarded away, included me as of three weeks ago. No drama, no side pieces, support, encouragement man of my word. Still not enough. True Love doesn’t cause heartbreak attachment does. Hope all are stronger on the other side❤️
90% of Women today are horrible I’ve just left my wife after she said she’s not happy wants a divorce all about her we have a child in a great husband and great dad her on the other hand has been messaging on social media a lad she works with I’ve gone no contact with her now for 1 week and I’m going strong the love fizz has gone and I’ve thought what was I thinking she’s been awful to me all through our 12 year relationship no going back for me I’m gonna concentrate on me and the child
Wow. How did the RUclips youtube algorithm bring me here. I finally escaped a 27 year old relationship. Finally reached a point were I thought I could survive without the person I devoted myself to and genuinely loved. So unconditional that even when it had become toxic and abusive I couldn't break free. Then a few months back I told her I will leave now. Just as she had told me to do so many times the last decade or so. This was met with this ridiculous notion that I was cheating and I was leaving for someone else. No. I never thought I wanted, needed or deserved someone better. I just wanted her...but she made it impossible for it to be. A lot of things caused the relationship to fail. But to some degree bad advice and videos like these plant ideas in minds of people who are easily influenced. Who is this advise for? High schoo? But then again the older I get the more I see that people act as foolish as they did in their younger years. Damn, I guess relationships are just wars and battles.on who is the better manipulator. I'ts never ending. My advise for a man or woman, son or daughter. Never fully open your heart to what you think is love in a romantic relationship. The absolute only that will accomplish is give one or.the other an ultimate weapon.
Please be careful when celebrating your ex coming back to reconcile due to no contact. There are many people that may find false hope in this due to wanting to get back with their ex.
Hi Coach Lee. This week was the 1 year anniversary of my breakup. I almost forgot about it - didn't remember on the exact day. Which is good, since it means that I have recovered and have detached from my ex. He never broke no contact, didn't attempt to reconcile. Which is OK - I'm at a much better place now and am indifferent to him. I binge watched your vids at the start of my healing journey. Thanks for all your vids. If anyone reads this - you'll be OK. Take your time to heal, you can do it. You're not alone. Love and light to all.
@@annabylina no, not anymore. I found out that he had a 3rd party while we were still together. That hurt, but it took a lot of healing to pull myself together. There's also a new person which is "knocking" on my door, so will see how it goes.
Update!! My ex reached out to me today after almost 60 days of no contact. Not sure if I want to go back but time will tell. I follow coach Lee's advice and it worked.
After 6 months of no contact And a month of her reaching out (I never ignored her) she is coming over for lunch tomorrow .. it was a bad break up I begged and chased but because I loved her I disappeared.. had no choice And she came back Really stick to no contact it hurts but it works
@cuscos1866 I wasn't prepared for when she returned and didn't do the self-improvement necessary so she quickly disappeared again .. Fortunately,I moved on with life and don't care anymore and just made a better life for myself for the next person who comes a long 🙂
I remember after my break up, I found Coach Lee. Watching these videos helped me so much!! It’s been almost a year and a half, and I’m doing so well and feel better. Stay strong and move forward!! You’ll be ok!
Dear it's 3 years she has blocked me .Even I dnt know why just because she got some 3 rd person in her life all the faults all the negative things was pointed on me...Days are passing by..But it's ok to be honest and cry then to be selfish ,betrayer
Me too! 15 months and hes just made contact. 10 yrs we were together. I went straight into no contact after being dumped. So so hard to do. I hope hes hurting as much as I did. I've moved on! Thanks coach Lee for all those videos, you don't know how much they helped me!
It’s been 1 year and 4 months no contact!!! It’s done!!! I’m 100% detached!!! My ex has been reaching out in person at my gym and text me about 1 year now. I ignore him. I’ll let him enjoy the loss
@@Liz-dragon-street. yes, thank you!!! Coach lee is right!! Your ex never forget you, even when they married or have kids. So stay strong if you ever get dumped.
I’m just about to hit 4 months NC. Definitely feeling better. I still go through bad moments - dreams etc. but these videos helped me so much over this time.
It's a long way brother but after a year you will feel a lot better, sometimes you'll miss her and have nightmares about it but those things will fade away.
The dreams are so painful. Especially ones when he comes back and everything is good again. I wake up and for a moment, I’m so relieved. And then I see the emptiness on his side of the bed and my heart breaks all over again. I am glad you’re feeling better. Wishing you all the best. For me, it’s been 3 months since he left (my fault), and 11 days NC. Take care 🙏🏻
@@annelily1883 I feel you, sometimes I dream about getting together, fixing the problems, even kissing and having s3x but it's just a dream and it won't be real again. And I'm over a year of NC, geez! no stalking or asking for some info about her. It takes a lot of time to heal.
@@JoshP86 holy cow!! That’s a king time to keep this up. I respect you. 🙏🏻 I’m hurting but I’m still hoping. I’ve pulled my tantrums and dumb sh*t before, and he’s come back. This time I outdid myself on the tantrum (a misunderstanding, but it’s no excuse), but it’s also the first time I’m actively working on myself with therapy, counseling, exercise (to relieve stress and take my anger out, and general good health), and I hope and pray he understands I’ve changed. He’s not the only great man in the world, but he’s the one I want and love. You’re so tough! Good luck to you, I genuinely hope you stop feeling any pain about this and move on to a happy and healthy relationship! 💚
Please what if you have never laid hands on your girlfriend for 2yrs and this particular time you lose self control after she was physically assaulting you by pulling your dress and u lose self control a slap her just that ones, can you forgive that person after he has beg for forgiveness so many times genuinely for hitting u?
This channel was life changing when my ex broke up with me and flaunted her new rebound, taught me so much. I have grown so much and can confidently say if i ever experience a breakup again i will be in a much better position. Btw my exe's rebound failed like they all do, i was her rebound guy too. Don't be a rebound guy.
I am two months today in no contact, Still following your advice. Not going to lie the first 30 days was extremely painful, but I pushed through!! I now feel 85% better, back in the gym, focusing on me, my goals and having fun with my friends etc. I didn’t quite understand the no contact rule in the beginning, I knew I had to do It because I felt like I was losing myself trying to earn love from someone else. So I blocked my ex completely on everything, I even deleted most of my social media to return to myself. I must say I feel a lot more self empowered right now then I ever have. I am uncertain as to whether my ex and I will ever get back together. But what I do know is that no contact truly makes a difference on self. So thank you for your coaching it definitely helps. Anyone who’s faced with this challenge do it for yourself, to regain your personal power, strength and confidence. To gain peace!💯 🙏🏾
It’s been around 10 weeks or so. Still hurts and I cry often. Trying my best to let go and move on. I don’t believe he’ll be back… I’m not even sure he really ever cared about me. Thankful God has a plan for my life and one day I’ll understand why I had to go through this very painful experience.
Beth, most of us went thru the same feelings. I was also in a horrible relationship with a narcissist, and it nearly killed me. TIME is the essence. Go out with your friends, pick up a hobby, and read. That took my mind off him and it DOES work. Get out of the house. Take care of yourself. You will be fine! ❤️🌷
In a 5yr relationship, just this past Saturday my GF was wanting to plan a vacation together. Sunday, she said “I had an attitude the last two months and she deserves better. So now she wants to break up.” Relationships are so weird.
My ex couldn’t even tell me it was over he friend zoned me. I was the one who called it out and said we need to have a conversation. That’s worse then being dumped when they don’t even have the respect or maturity to be honest about how they feel
He is the best of all coaches. The rest I wouldn't even consider so-called "coaches". Intelligent, calm, relaxed, a pinch of great sense of (YES) masculine humour. I'm still in the middle of your process of getting my ex back as well as myself. I'm feeling better day by day by watching your videos. Brilliant content. All the best, Ferenc
It's been a minute since I've completely healed the beard is looking great man thank you for everything I was heartbroken in February of 2020 I was devastated.. I remember in a comment I put that I believe you favorited I had said that your theme music became the theme music to my breakup, such a painful time for me but man your no-contact helped me so much. Everybody stand strong listen to this man he knows what he's talking about, it seems like the hardest thing to do but it does empower you for sure. You take your ex's attention away from them it's just like taking currency away from someone. Do not worry everyone it will be okay, love all of you we are all in this together The grieving is real but you're not alone.❤❤❤❤
The void your ex left needs to be filled with healthy behaviors. No contact is extremely helpful. Fill that void with personal growth. Be genuine about it though, your ex can smell false confidence.
My ex girlfriend changed about a month ago. 22 days ago she broke up with me starting wasn’t sure what she wanted. I begged plead, cried. Saw each other two weeks ago, again same thing. She confessed she is talking to her ex, the one that cheated on her many times and treated her like shit. 8 days of no contact and I realized that I was too much of a woman for her. Staying strong even though my heart is broken.
Something happened to me today. I was dumped harshly and abruptly on Monday and I had to bite the bull€t and did no contact, blocked, disappeared Houdini and he just messaged me today we had a good conversation but my path wasn't shaken to go back, my approach was calm and of self awareness. He asked why I blocked him and I said because he dumped me like he was taking the trash out. Stay strong people.
Love always prevails. If there is no love, just move on. If it is, fight for him or her as much as you can and work on yourself to never make the same mistakes again.
My gf dumped me; put me “on pause” (wtf is THAT?..lol). I bit my tongue and struggled hard and went all out zero contact. I got myself centered and even met someone else to the point where this new girl and I started a relationship. I was still reeling inside and missing my ex. After 3-4 months she contacted me out of the blue. In short, we got back together and we both see each other so differently. It’s so strong and amazing now. Our communication is better, we laugh harder, love stronger and have bonded so much better. Ty
I broke up with my ex because he was bread crumbing me and he completely pulled back. Still have feelings for him after years… weird. Being on your own is better than unhappy with the wrong person
@@dandee28 hi mate, hope you’re getting on okay. It’s been 2 months now and still she won’t reach out but I’m coming to terms with the fact that she never will and am starting to look forward to my future. Time is a healer my friend and no contact is a practice to help you heal yourself without them. Take it easy pal
I’m just in my saul Goodman phase. My love left me and I’ve just poured my energy into no contact and growing my business…and I see no contact working and my business has grown exponentially
Anyone watching this should buy his emergency breakup kit to support him for all his help!!!! Instead of watching random videos it’s curated in a way that makes sense and really helps you through the breakup process then you can come back and watch these videos.
over 7 months - I was desperate, now I am getting over it. Some days I'm crying like a baby (still) and some days I am feeling stronger. At the beginning I was a wreck! Getting better now - still sad but alive!
I just woke up & found this video effortless! I'm kinda going through something like this. It makes it easier knowing what's going on in the brain. The universe must looking out for me teaching me! Thanxx for the lesson🙄
Oh my! I had to kiss you from my phone. You thoroughly described every detail about when the heart is broken and how you recuperate for few days because your body resists the pain . Meaning you start getting used to-the pain or you pass the stage of pain. When you finally cross the border or the shadow of the valley of death you start getting power again while your ex is in agony. This is when the table turns.😍❤🙏🏽 thank you coach Lee
I will comment on these videos as often as coach Lee posts them.. he is legit, 7 months of no contact, gave her the break up, pursued new hobbies, found new friends traveled alone and created a new life for myself.. the stages the ex goes through is true ! Follow his guidance it the real trick is to do it for YOU. His breakup kit was also a good purchase .. as corny as it sounds or feels. I have no regrets. Coach Lee got me through the hardest emotional times in regards to romance.. he knows what he is talking about and I'll always be grateful 🙏 ❤
This is one of the best videos I've seen on this topic. I was dumped (first time in my life), mostly circumstantial but also I caused him pain with my words- so he left. At first I was begging and pleading for a second chance and apologized numerous times for the pain caused etc. (I was going through the loss of a mother and toxic divorce- I was clearly not my best self but even in that he said I was the most amazing women he'd ever met) He'd call me like every few days and the last time he did so I didn't answer- he texted yesterday- didn't answer. He's said that he will "talk to" other women in one of our last convos and he needed clarity that I was the one- cool, do that. You don't get to call me every few days and me continue to be available for you- my mindset shifted and this video is the exact extra confirmation I totally made the right choice :)
It’s so true , her previous ex made himself available to her for 3 years by staying in contact with her regularly but she never went back to him and I imagine looked upon him only as a friend who she could get back at any time she wanted.
It makes alot of sense, And I think we all Instinctively know That no contact is the best play. In my situation, I told my ex how much i cared for her but that i also had been unhappy for some time in our relationship and she wasnt the only one, i also asked her if she would like to sit down and and discuss what happened to cause the rupture after 5 yrs together, And even if we couldn't get things back on track, at least we would have a better understanding of what our roles in this was.. She said she was very sorry for everything that had happened, But did not address my question.. That's neither a yes or no, So that triggered me to go into full, no contact.. That's where i've been for nearly a week. It's tough at times but i'm doing it. It kinda comes Down to that old thing that all of our parents and grandparents told us. If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours in the first place. Like he said in the video here, your ex nay have someone else in waiting, or maybe not. Its hard to do but you have to let that go in your mind
The problem is, you have to keep in mind that while there's this "no contact" going on, you Ex is intimately contacting another. That why they left. no one leaves to be alone; they leave into the arms of another. So, if you are OK with that, then fine. Also, when they call back and want you back, it's because the "fling" they left you for didn't work out.
Yup. Hell she moved away to a place closer to him, if not moved in with him directly. And that was before the breakup after I finally caught on to what she was doing. I won’t lie, even months later it still hurts. I’ve come to accept it on some level, and if she ever tries to come back she will find I’m no longer there.
I remember when I watched your vids 6 months ago I didn’t go no contact I kept trying to reach out and she ghosted me to oblivion. Then I found someone else. And 6 months later I’m completely over my ex. And it feels very good. I doubt my ex will message me again but if she did I wouldn’t give her a chance in hell.
i dont think you should be waiting for your ex to get back in life just move on with no contact and improve yourselves things will fall in place at the right time.
Well… my ex turned out to be a narc. I was debating whether he was or wasn’t. The only reason he texted me was to tell me he is doing wonderful (after he broke up with me). Nah, he was trying to tell me he was with someone else. I’m done. If he ever truly comes back, I don’t want someone who doesn’t care about me or my feelings. He broke my heart and lied- he doesn’t care. Never even gave me a reasons why the break up was happening, because he wanted to move on to the next girl. 😢
As a widower after 40 years together I never thought I'd be in another relationship but here I am 3 years in. My partner is loving and has a strong rock of beliefs, very traditional, fun & compliant but equally takes no shit because she has had a hard life. I know that if we split then we are done because it will be over something fundamental to our relationship. It wont be something petty or anything that we can compromise over. She won't contact me nor will I contact her. I know this already and accept it, while I'm more willing to compromise i have my red lines too. We are good together, we respect each other and are forgiving. This gives us strength and resilience but if disrespect crept in on either part, it will be bye and thanks for the good times. Im grateful that we wont play silly games and strategies to get back together, if we split its going to be over something we can't fix.
It’s a shame that people are so screwed up, that it has to be this way. They can’t just love you cause you’re a great guy. You have play all this mental mind f stuff. And it is all 100% true. I have lived it with one woman several times. Don’t even want her back anymore.. But we connected in a way like I never have with anyone else. I respected and valued what we had. She never did, and I learned after the first couple times, that it works exactly as he says.. Write emails, try and convince them of your love does the opposite. In that moment they could give two shits about what you feel. It’s all about what she feels. So all that talking just annoys her. You walk away, and your value goes up. It’s pretty stupid really. Emotionally immature BS. Maybe one day I’ll meet a woman who isn’t this screwed up that just wants it to be real.. No BS games
Spent a weekend with one recently, known her two years. I’m the only guy that treats her right apparently and her daughter says she should get together with me, she told me she loved me. It’s not enough, she wants someone to argue with, I walk away from all that and would rather talk things through to resolve conflict. I went NC when I got back. The weekend was supposed to be about us getting closer together, it was anything but that. I wouldn’t care if I ever spoke to her again for the way she treated me.
@@richardcollins586 yeah, it’s like until they’re lying in a hospital bed somewhere when they’re old, they just take you for granted. You bond , and come to see the relationship as having much value, and being irreplaceable. That means you sit down together like adults,not go in to some mode where you have to be alone for a week or so as you convince yourself I’m not enough.. I have flaws… Guess what, so did she..That is unrealistic and immature relationship skills. I loved her with all her flaws.. That’s the difference.. I find this especially true of very attractive women, which mine was. The whole point I made clear to her when we first got back together after not seeing her since the 90’s , was I wanted real, and to be able to open up and not hold back. Unfortunately man, that’s the movies, as you kill attraction being too real. You have to keep them chasing and not get too deep. It’s not how I want to live, but I stepped out of being on my game, and I got gut wrenching heartache for it. Best thing you can do is what you did. Good luck to you
It's how woman phycology works to keep her hooked. you must put them on pedestal, strongly disagree with some case, some time bring tears her eye, make her very happy. Those old days are gone where masculine and feminine were respected.
So true bro. Sounds like my story. She played games the whole relationship, I played none. Breakup games, jealousy games, attention games, silent games....took me a while to understand she was very emotionally damaged. A lot of it was her fault and her doing though she will never admit to any wrongdoing of the smallest degree and points the finger at everyone. We were both so incredibly close. That was hard to get past.
I've listened to so many videos, I've reflected so much on everything, and this video has literally made everything click. It's hitting the nail on the head
Coach Lee, You are sincerely the best advice on the internet. Clear. Concise. No playing games. I wish I had known all of your wisdom the first time she broke up with me. I didn’t give her the breakup, because it was 100% out of the blue, within a week, I called and asked her “do you love me?” “Yes”. “Do you think I love you?” “Yes”. “Is this what you want?” “No”. And we weren’t broken up anymore. The second time this happened, 100% out of the blue, I still didn’t know about no contact. Had I employed your strategies, I’d probably be back with her. But I don’t know if I’d even want that now.
1 month of NC radio silence no begging and pleading i disappeared like a ghost and he reached out he send me email and text to greet me HBD he said that he missed me, it hits him after i left now we started talking again but i still have to put my guards up and take things slowly. Thanks coach lee watching your video helps me alot❤
I was there never thought ever if I’ll laugh one day . I was crushed I didn’t beg I moved moved until he came back to his senses . Now we are happily married
Im on day 2 of no contact, i had to distance myself a bit because my ex girlfriend would be very hot and cold with me. I broke up the relationship and then realized it was a mistake now she doesnt know what she wants. These videos help me and are all i look forward too. I even joined the support group. Hopefully i can book a coaching session with Coach Lee once I get paid this week.
I did. the same mistake.. she wanted time and i hadnt give her the time and put her under pressure for 3 weeks and than i break up with her. 1 day later i realised the mistake and told her but she was understandable angry and sad. Now i give her the time and Hope i didnt do to much pressure in the beginning.
Defn not a mistake, although it may feel that way atm. I had the same situation with a come and go girl. Dealing with that is a horror show and you know it. If she gives a fuk, shell put in, if not, its the most destructive thingbin the world to you. Fuk that mate. Look after yourself, work out, find your centre. If youre seeing someone, people are either in or out. Theres no grey there. We ended it yesterday. I was ready but disappointed but knew it was for the best. If youre more unhappy than happy you need to clear the deck, as hard as it is.
I’ve just started on this journey, it’s so hard, I feel I have to apologise for all my short comings and all the wrongs I’ve done over the years we have spent together. On top of this we are sharing a house we’ve bought together so keeping distance is very hard, neither of us can move out until the house is sold. I’ve been keeping myself away (and so has she) by just trying to not get under each others feet, fortunately there are spare rooms and if she’s cooking or upstairs using the shower and bedroom I just try be elsewhere, I take myself out, just to drive and give more space. This video has been very helpful and calmed me massively hearing this is the way to do things, I’m sure I’ll return to this and rewatch many times over. Thankyou
I believe the title of the video is called: "Is the 30 Day No Contact Rule ENOUGH To Get An Ex Back?" I hope you are doing okay, in spite of your current circumstances!
I always ghost women who break up with me. If they want they can try to get back with me, but breaking up with me is a huge breach of trust and loyalty. So, if she wants to get back to me, she had _better_ make it up to me.
This is all under the presumption that the person leaving isn't taking antidepressants. They're relieved, but numb. I'd like to see more on that topic please
My man has stayed in relief stage forever. Can't believe that after 5 years I had meant nothing for him. He never asked how am I since. 7 month. Unbearable pain. I know it's all for the best however.
Digital Magic, I'm so sorry for you. Be grateful that someone like that is gone! What kind of a life would you have had if he was still there? Start going out and have some fun. Pick up a good hobby, and make sure you get out of the house. Big hug for you..❤❤⚘️
The pain is the problem, you waiting is the problem, give up on him by giving yourself the value you gave to him. He feels your energy and know you still around. Don't be around give a f* you should honour yourself enough to not care anymore.
If I broke up with someone and they went no contact..I won that is the point of a break up. To get rid of a unwanted relationship. Thanks for preaching this because We don't want begging people. Let my new relationship alone peacefully.
what a video , what a video , coach Lee , perhaps the best coach on the surface of world RUclips family. Listen him , he make us feel so attractive , so confident , so superalpha , so good in our own skin. Thanq so much coach , you're literally helping lives to thriving through hardest phases. Perhaps , the megamegasuperstar in the topic. Experience is everything !!!
Appreciate hearing this knowledge, son I’m going through this phase now. She was still trying to be my “friend” after break up. But I know that was just to make it easier for her. With me, I completely ghost you after we’re done. Blocked on everything I have to pretty much make it as if you never existed.
Now the other side of this, sometime the person breaking up with you is certain of their decision and the person being broke up with simply has to heal and just learn to move on. I’m the person that got broken I’m with and still, I’m carrying this sadness and weight everyday 😢
Coach Lee ; very great video on this brain; physical manifestation from people in a relationship - especially when you and Ken on a live chat mixed in potential different personalties an ex may have had or still have to go along for the ride; including possible personality disorder symptoms; which this video gives more insight into concepts like stress hormones; and human behavior; and how these can effect people with a variety personalties in different ways; in addition to just a one size fits all human behavior/physical manifestation of the brain from a romantic relationship that broke up (i hope a lot of people watch Ken and your live chats)!
best video coach lee, been broken a few days ago,, while i was having a hard time reaching out videos that could make me feel better, this video is by far the best video both emotionally and strategically. thank you so much…
He went back to his ex wife after we had an 11 month relationship. I haven’t heard anything from him for over 6 months. He wanted to marry me ! He said he loved me.. After talking and texting everyday “ several”times a day …. nothing 😢 I still cry !
Coach Lee's No Contact worked in my case, a long term relationship of over 6 years severed for someone else to take my place. Took only a little over 2 weeks. I give this advice but for some reason, not everyone will follow it. I like learning more what happened like vasopressin and oxytocin (did not know), plus the cortisol. Buy the break-up kit and follow. My SO has confirmed stuff that Coach Lee has said, admits to being a jerk back then. We now are spending the rest of our lives together and my SO has been awesome for a year after we got back together. We were "friends" for 4 months before I got asked to get back together. (Not the normal situation I understand).
My ex block me n unblock me several times I accept him many times but now it's has been three months no contact and am feeling better n strong until this time I accept that he will never come back am moving on I will be single for a very long time I will be loving myself more until I met the right one for now it's only about me
So thankful I found Coach Lee. I felt my gf slipping away and I chased and it only pushed her away more. She needed time and I wasn’t picking up the clues. Now she has broken up with me to get her space. I have been in NC from day one since she made the breakup official.
Has anyone here read the book Attached? It’s a good book and has a lot of good information on the types of attachment. Anxious, secure or avoidance. Figure out which you are and what either your partner is and or what is best suited for you. I highly recommend this to anyone interested
He is so right I remember my ex husband leaving he for another woman. I thought life had enough thru looked so happy . Matching outfits etc. I could t eat I could t sleep 6 months later they ended and he was begging me even stalking me popping up at church etc. I had moved on and was happy. Forgiveness doesn’t require reconnection. I’m going through this again with a current ex and I know soon the tables will turn and if it doesn’t they weren’t for you
meroshango9, I can recommend Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit for you which will help you immensely and make you feel better. totally get how insanely tough it is, and I've been right there in the same boat. You gotta check out Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's an awesome guide that'll save you from feeling totally lost in this crazy time. It tackles all sorts of situations and gives you strategies you never even considered. You can find it at myexbackcoach.com/ebk. Seriously, I'm rooting for you and hoping it works wonders!
JUST RETURNING AFTER ONE YEAR. WENT NO CONTACT, SHE REACHED OUT AND NOW WERE TOGETHER AND STRONGER THAN EVER. WANT TO GIVE A SINCERE THANK YOU, COACH LEE.
Awesome Josue! Thank you for returning to encourage people with your good news!
Hi,
Congratulations on you getting back with your ex. Can you tell me more about that please
Awesome
@@josuerodriguez5991 That’s awesome. I hope no contact works for me. This is a tough situation.
Best of luck to you both
No contact is strong, but please don't do like me and use it only to get your ex back. Stop checking their socials and unfriend them if it makes you feel better. Just try to work on yourself and try to slowly move on. Meet new people and rewrite your own narrative without them in it. The right person will come back eventually, but please don't pause your life and wait for it.
Well spoken..
😘😘🙏
Thanks for saying it so well. Im wishing I’d never crossed those lines from friends to lovers regardless I was supposed to fall in love with my “best friend”.
I did that for so longggggg...now I know better
Good thing she unfriended me haha, if not I would probably be there checking every day
I wish love was more than just a mind game
I know. If one can't be honest with themself, how are they ever going to honest with another?
It's called infatuation and lust, hun, not love. Love is divine. This generation is doomed.
There is a 1% that is pure love, not just some mind game, but that’s only when it is with the right person (rare as f)
Sadly pure love is very rare. And in the end is all about psychology and brain chemistry not "love from fair tales". Sad truth.
So do I far too many Players far too many mind games
If someone breaks up with you, don’t even reply. Go no contact as soon as possible and give them what they think they want….which is no more “you”…….trust me.. most of the time, this abrupt action will spark their curiosity and THEY will reach out. But, when they do…really ask yourself if THEY are what YOU really want. You made it this far, after all!
Badly need this advice right now 😢
Such good advice. Relationships are meant to be safe places and the way some of these people have ditched us is not safe. Do we really need that instability in our lives?
She broke up with me and i didn't even answer
I overpursued and then I pushed her away into the arms of another man. This happened over Holidays. She still wanted to be friends but I refused and told her I want romance only or nothing at all. The reality is that I still love her a lot. However like other's have said before, why should I be her backup plan if she does come back. It's always going to be a feeling of second option. I know I deserve better along with anyone else who has been cheated on, or used. Waiting for someone or taking someone back never ends well! I found out the hard way and it's a lesson I will never forget.
Right
No contact is really for YOU. A chance to breathe, and recover, and regain strength.
❤
I agree, don't hold on to hope they'll return... Nothing is guaranteed in life and You can always count on impertinence! Accept the change in a positive way and work on your own happiness, stay strong, regain your peace, amen🙏
Almost 4 weeks of No Contact. Watching these videos is certainly helping with the pain.
I’m a week in today, and I already feel better
Stay strong brother
Been in a NC for almost 1 week now. Proud of myself for letting it be a clean break. No argument, no accusations, no pleading, no defending; just simply accepting his decision and telling him "it's okay, i'll be fine.. i dont want to stay friends".. been going to gym 3 times in the last week and watching a lot of coaching video's to stay strong.. its been only a week.. but i will be doing just fine
He didn't contact me.. 😢. He called me 6days back. I called him. But he didn't respond me..I text him. He didn't reply me.
me too , NC and went to gym . it is also 1 weeks now but we didnot end good . We fight and he was rude but nvm anymore ,release
How are you now
Please give us an update. We’re all in this together 🙏
So, basically I fucked up.. he did come back very carefully.. sending me memes on instagram privately and very short conversations. Fun, but very briefly. But sooooo slow! I over-invested and in an impulsive moment I felt I just wanted him back in my life; even if it's just friends.. so I asked him to call me because I deleted his number.. he called me instantly and we talked for like 2 hours on the phone.. me replying my point of view as I didnt really do that when he broke up. But it was an overall pleasant conversation. But he wasnt there where he needed to be... yet....
And then last saturday I went out with friends, had a little bit too much wine and got frisky after he send me a flirtatious text.. I asked him to come and pick me up and we had a very passionate night together. But in the days after it more felt like a bootycall. So yesterday I send him a message saying we really cant do friends apparently... and that despite me having enjoyed saturdaynight a lot, its not what i want to settle for with him and that it makes it impossible for me to move on this way.. that i feel we are a very good match together and I do want to make it work with him... that all issues he had, are things we could have worked out. That all that was needed is us being willing to make it work..but that our issue is that he doesnt want to, so there is no point.
And now I restarted my no-contact.... first 24 hours are done....
I really messed it up by wanting to go too fast! Like.. I do feel there still was no pleading and begging... and there still were no arguments or bad moments.. and I do feel I said things that could really make him re-think his decision and choice.. but I feel I also messed up badly by being too eager.
I dont know I will get him back now.. kinda feel like i won't...😢
I have used the no contact rule the minute I split with my ex. It was hard but I stuck to it. Not only did I heal at my own pace but I healed so much that I started attracting those around me. A year and somewhat later, I met someone else and I have never been so happy. It works when you believe in yourself enough in relation to removing yourself in a place that no longer serves you.
He/She didn’t even reach out within those months?
@@shirleybragat2773 yes she did, every single day. Constant phone calls and text messages. Even tried to talk to me through various social media platforms. I guess in the end the no contact worked for me because I had no expectations. I let time do it’s thing and it gave me a clear vision of what I wanted and needed in life. Granted no contact works if you want them back, but it could also work when you’re ready to heal and move forward. Only you can decide what’s best for you.
@@emmah8343 she did
I hope that I will be strong like you
Thats not no contact. Its a break up lol
My ex contacted me 2 days ago, we had a good talk...she said at the end that she had realised what i have done for her in our entire 6 year relationship, she was impulsive , and now she is understanding as she is getting mature...she apologized...it took her 6 months...
Thanks for your advice and all the amazing videos...
For now, i have made her clear that my entire focus is building my career...
I just want to say to all those souls who are suffering..."be strong, identify your value, focus on your career, as your career will not betray you" ...
I only been separated for 2 months and some days but we have children. 7 year relationship. Hopefully, it can get fixed like yours.
Sign a Common Law Contract or Marriage Contract, protect your asset, guys!
So very happy for you!!! :)
Super. You just need to focus on you. Well done!😊
Your career can definitely betray you.
I’m in my second day guys, it’s hard. But all your comments give me a lote of hope. Beginning a big journey.
I’m with you
How you doing these days?
Hey what happend did it work?!
It’s my first day … it’s so hard 🫠
@@missmania4561 Hang in there, im almost a week in. It sucks it really does. Keep this in mind though, every day that goes by, you get stronger and they actually get weaker if you stay in no contact whatsoever. These stages in the video do actually happen. When this person comes back, make sure you have the high ground.
We went no contact for a long period of time. He came back, we are stronger than ever!! I used to be here listening to this videos every single day and all I can say is trust the process! You either heal from it or it makes you guys stronger either way it’s a win win 😊👍🏽
That's amazing! How long were y'all in NC for?
@@Amy-q2u for 8 months
@@moytheboytech616 I've been in NC for a little over 2 months. And I'm right there with you. Some days/nights are hard as hell but I always come back to these videos and comments to give me encouragement and hope. Just keep going and improving yourself! You're not alone in this
hopewanjiru5560, Coach Lee is very proud of you both. He has a Workshop which he and I recommend you join. It's excellent and it has EVERYTHING you need to know about yourself and so much more.know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.
I’m happy for you both! This did not work in my case. I reached out after a year of us being broken up and within that time 8 months of NC. And his poor choices led me to breaking up with him again and walking away for good this time. There are no third chances not when he hasn’t shown me he’s changed and worked on his issues. It’s heartbreaking but I know my worth.
Wishing you the best! ❤
So sad all these people who pour in so much love are just discarded away, included me as of three weeks ago. No drama, no side pieces, support, encouragement man of my word. Still not enough. True Love doesn’t cause heartbreak attachment does. Hope all are stronger on the other side❤️
How are you handling it? It''s been almost two weeks for me and I'm already feeling guilty and preoccupied about what happened.
90% of Women today are horrible I’ve just left my wife after she said she’s not happy wants a divorce all about her we have a child in a great husband and great dad her on the other hand has been messaging on social media a lad she works with I’ve gone no contact with her now for 1 week and I’m going strong the love fizz has gone and I’ve thought what was I thinking she’s been awful to me all through our 12 year relationship no going back for me I’m gonna concentrate on me and the child
@@craigy691and I feel all men are horrible. How about we just accept that a lot of people aren’t healthy..
Wow. How did the RUclips youtube algorithm bring me here. I finally escaped a 27 year old relationship. Finally reached a point were I thought I could survive without the person I devoted myself to and genuinely loved. So unconditional that even when it had become toxic and abusive I couldn't break free. Then a few months back I told her I will leave now. Just as she had told me to do so many times the last decade or so. This was met with this ridiculous notion that I was cheating and I was leaving for someone else. No. I never thought I wanted, needed or deserved someone better. I just wanted her...but she made it impossible for it to be. A lot of things caused the relationship to fail. But to some degree bad advice and videos like these plant ideas in minds of people who are easily influenced. Who is this advise for? High schoo? But then again the older I get the more I see that people act as foolish as they did in their younger years. Damn, I guess relationships are just wars and battles.on who is the better manipulator. I'ts never ending. My advise for a man or woman, son or daughter. Never fully open your heart to what you think is love in a romantic relationship. The absolute only that will accomplish is give one or.the other an ultimate weapon.
Yes its attachment not Love ❤
He's looking at my stories. Still no contact for almost a week now. I already refused being friend zoned last week. I am focusing on myself and God.
Please be careful when celebrating your ex coming back to reconcile due to no contact. There are many people that may find false hope in this due to wanting to get back with their ex.
Hi Coach Lee. This week was the 1 year anniversary of my breakup. I almost forgot about it - didn't remember on the exact day. Which is good, since it means that I have recovered and have detached from my ex. He never broke no contact, didn't attempt to reconcile. Which is OK - I'm at a much better place now and am indifferent to him. I binge watched your vids at the start of my healing journey. Thanks for all your vids. If anyone reads this - you'll be OK. Take your time to heal, you can do it. You're not alone. Love and light to all.
Do you still want to get back together?
@@annabylina no, not anymore. I found out that he had a 3rd party while we were still together. That hurt, but it took a lot of healing to pull myself together. There's also a new person which is "knocking" on my door, so will see how it goes.
Don’t start new relationship until you get over your ex that’s good for you and other person
Time is a great healer
Almost 10 months guys, stay strong
More power to you 💞
Update?
Just give that shit up bro that’s insane 😂
Update!! My ex reached out to me today after almost 60 days of no contact. Not sure if I want to go back but time will tell. I follow coach Lee's advice and it worked.
How's it been
@@JJ-dw4lz
We are back together. Going on strong. The no contact works! Thanks to coach Lee.
@@ao5624any tips on not losing hope during nc?
@@Juliette277all you can do is work on yourself so that if she does reach out. You have an edge if you’d except her back or not
How did they contact you. Was it like hey how you been? Or just checking on how u been?
After 6 months of no contact
And a month of her reaching out (I never ignored her) she is coming over for lunch tomorrow .. it was a bad break up I begged and chased but because I loved her I disappeared.. had no choice
And she came back
Really stick to no contact it hurts but it works
But 6 months are a very Long time isnt it?
update?
@cuscos1866 I wasn't prepared for when she returned and didn't do the self-improvement necessary so she quickly disappeared again ..
Fortunately,I moved on with life and don't care anymore and just made a better life for myself for the next person who comes a long 🙂
@sebm8075 similar situation but yet she says she cares and the other talked sweet n said she loved me was that how your kinda went?
I guess I been a month out on my NC and my ex is going nuts I won't chase
I remember after my break up, I found Coach Lee. Watching these videos helped me so much!! It’s been almost a year and a half, and I’m doing so well and feel better. Stay strong and move forward!! You’ll be ok!
That’s awesome 🙌
Dear it's 3 years she has blocked me .Even I dnt know why just because she got some 3 rd person in her life all the faults all the negative things was pointed on me...Days are passing by..But it's ok to be honest and cry then to be selfish ,betrayer
Me too! 15 months and hes just made contact. 10 yrs we were together. I went straight into no contact after being dumped. So so hard to do. I hope hes hurting as much as I did. I've moved on! Thanks coach Lee for all those videos, you don't know how much they helped me!
8pó
8il
It’s been 1 year and 4 months no contact!!! It’s done!!! I’m 100% detached!!! My ex has been reaching out in person at my gym and text me about 1 year now. I ignore him. I’ll let him enjoy the loss
Glad you found yourself and the love you have for yourself ❤
@@Liz-dragon-street. yes, thank you!!! Coach lee is right!! Your ex never forget you, even when they married or have kids. So stay strong if you ever get dumped.
@@antilaw9911 no, I learned how to live without him. I’m glad he asked for the breakup.
How long was ur relationship? It's been 112 days of no contact and it's been torment for me 24/7/112.
@@antilaw9911 what a weird comment. You sound bitter jealous. Seek professional help
In the end, watching this not even makes me more wise, but also helps me to spend time in a productive way. Feel connected - not separated
I’m just about to hit 4 months NC. Definitely feeling better. I still go through bad moments - dreams etc. but these videos helped me so much over this time.
It's a long way brother but after a year you will feel a lot better, sometimes you'll miss her and have nightmares about it but those things will fade away.
@@Markdaamannn it’s over, man. Sorry.
The dreams are so painful. Especially ones when he comes back and everything is good again. I wake up and for a moment, I’m so relieved. And then I see the emptiness on his side of the bed and my heart breaks all over again. I am glad you’re feeling better. Wishing you all the best. For me, it’s been 3 months since he left (my fault), and 11 days NC. Take care 🙏🏻
@@annelily1883 I feel you, sometimes I dream about getting together, fixing the problems, even kissing and having s3x but it's just a dream and it won't be real again.
And I'm over a year of NC, geez! no stalking or asking for some info about her. It takes a lot of time to heal.
@@JoshP86 holy cow!! That’s a king time to keep this up. I respect you. 🙏🏻 I’m hurting but I’m still hoping. I’ve pulled my tantrums and dumb sh*t before, and he’s come back. This time I outdid myself on the tantrum (a misunderstanding, but it’s no excuse), but it’s also the first time I’m actively working on myself with therapy, counseling, exercise (to relieve stress and take my anger out, and general good health), and I hope and pray he understands I’ve changed. He’s not the only great man in the world, but he’s the one I want and love.
You’re so tough! Good luck to you, I genuinely hope you stop feeling any pain about this and move on to a happy and healthy relationship! 💚
I would never abruptly break up with someone unless ultimate violence and disrespect happens. I believe in talking things out peacefully.
Please what if you have never laid hands on your girlfriend for 2yrs and this particular time you lose self control after she was physically assaulting you by pulling your dress and u lose self control a slap her just that ones, can you forgive that person after he has beg for forgiveness so many times genuinely for hitting u?
So accurate. I think it hurts more when it's abrupt.
It's sad but honestly I have even been willing to deal with the physical stuff on multiple occasions
@@aundavioncook2131 never allow anyone to put hands on you for a violent reason. Love yourself as God loves you.
Exactly.
This channel was life changing when my ex broke up with me and flaunted her new rebound, taught me so much. I have grown so much and can confidently say if i ever experience a breakup again i will be in a much better position. Btw my exe's rebound failed like they all do, i was her rebound guy too. Don't be a rebound guy.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Its been 6 months and I am still going stronger than ever.Thank you
This was a good one. I like the you wouldn’t show up for work when you’ve been fired analogy
I am two months today in no contact, Still following your advice. Not going to lie the first 30 days was extremely painful, but I pushed through!! I now feel 85% better, back in the gym, focusing on me, my goals and having fun with my friends etc.
I didn’t quite understand the no contact rule in the beginning, I knew I had to do It because I felt like I was losing myself trying to earn love from someone else. So I blocked my ex completely on everything, I even deleted most of my social media to return to myself. I must say I feel a lot more self empowered right now then I ever have. I am uncertain as to whether my ex and I will ever get back together. But what I do know is that no contact truly makes a difference on self. So thank you for your coaching it definitely helps. Anyone who’s faced with this challenge do it for yourself, to regain your personal power, strength and confidence. To gain peace!💯 🙏🏾
Did he/she come back or you’re still on no contact terms?
@@akankshatalwar5307did yours come back its been a month since you made this comment
no contact means you blocked him also on social media?
It’s been around 10 weeks or so. Still hurts and I cry often. Trying my best to let go and move on. I don’t believe he’ll be back… I’m not even sure he really ever cared about me. Thankful God has a plan for my life and one day I’ll understand why I had to go through this very painful experience.
Beth, most of us went thru the same feelings. I was also in a horrible relationship with a narcissist, and it nearly killed me. TIME is the essence. Go out with your friends, pick up a hobby, and read. That took my mind off him and it DOES work. Get out of the house. Take care of yourself. You will be fine! ❤️🌷
I once had such 😭😭😭
That's me right now...
In a 5yr relationship, just this past Saturday my GF was wanting to plan a vacation together. Sunday, she said “I had an attitude the last two months and she deserves better. So now she wants to break up.” Relationships are so weird.
My ex couldn’t even tell me it was over he friend zoned me. I was the one who called it out and said we need to have a conversation. That’s worse then being dumped when they don’t even have the respect or maturity to be honest about how they feel
Womyn invented "friend-zoning"; Men are perfecting it. Womyn unhappy. Too bad. Womyn are the ones who NEED 'closure'.
A month ago he send a friend request on Facebook then 1 sec later he block me so I text him said is over
@@tdrive398Womyn? Wth is that?
@@Saranda4787 Aren't you a strong, independent f-enist who don't need men?
Just describing them as they are: wo-myn, not wo-men. Bitter lonely losers.
He is the best of all coaches. The rest I wouldn't even consider so-called "coaches". Intelligent, calm, relaxed, a pinch of great sense of (YES) masculine humour. I'm still in the middle of your process of getting my ex back as well as myself. I'm feeling better day by day by watching your videos.
Brilliant content.
All the best,
Ferenc
It's been a minute since I've completely healed the beard is looking great man thank you for everything I was heartbroken in February of 2020 I was devastated..
I remember in a comment I put that I believe you favorited I had said that your theme music became the theme music to my breakup, such a painful time for me but man your no-contact helped me so much.
Everybody stand strong listen to this man he knows what he's talking about, it seems like the hardest thing to do but it does empower you for sure.
You take your ex's attention away from them it's just like taking currency away from someone.
Do not worry everyone it will be okay, love all of you we are all in this together
The grieving is real but you're not alone.❤❤❤❤
Thank you for the update and encouragement for folks Don!
I could never beg a person to be with me. It’s just not on me.
The void your ex left needs to be filled with healthy behaviors. No contact is extremely helpful. Fill that void with personal growth. Be genuine about it though, your ex can smell false confidence.
My ex girlfriend changed about a month ago. 22 days ago she broke up with me starting wasn’t sure what she wanted. I begged plead, cried. Saw each other two weeks ago, again same thing. She confessed she is talking to her ex, the one that cheated on her many times and treated her like shit. 8 days of no contact and I realized that I was too much of a woman for her. Staying strong even though my heart is broken.
Something happened to me today. I was dumped harshly and abruptly on Monday and I had to bite the bull€t and did no contact, blocked, disappeared Houdini and he just messaged me today we had a good conversation but my path wasn't shaken to go back, my approach was calm and of self awareness. He asked why I blocked him and I said because he dumped me like he was taking the trash out. Stay strong people.
We broke up 2years ago and i went silent. He called me yesterday 😢😢..
New subscriber ❤
Acceptance is key
Right!
Love always prevails. If there is no love, just move on. If it is, fight for him or her as much as you can and work on yourself to never make the same mistakes again.
My gf dumped me; put me “on pause” (wtf is THAT?..lol). I bit my tongue and struggled hard and went all out zero contact. I got myself centered and even met someone else to the point where this new girl and I started a relationship. I was still reeling inside and missing my ex. After 3-4 months she contacted me out of the blue. In short, we got back together and we both see each other so differently. It’s so strong and amazing now. Our communication is better, we laugh harder, love stronger and have bonded so much better. Ty
Thankuu your words healed me in my worst situation when i am going towards darkness of depression... Pray for me i would get healed😌
No Contact should be included in the book 48 Laws of Power.
Its there use absence to create respect and honour law number 16
I broke up with my ex because he was bread crumbing me and he completely pulled back. Still have feelings for him after years… weird. Being on your own is better than unhappy with the wrong person
Going on 4 months. I never begged or pleaded. They have my info if they wanted to talk they would have. Moving on looking for someone else
Move on they obviously have
Yeah, most of the time girls have a back up plan so, if she got rid of you is because she wants to be with her new lover.
Guldham Style, I would move on. It's possible she has someone new.
@@bosslady991 fine by me i moved on started dating others the second she walked out
@@jannlewandowski5540 i already expect her to. I wasted 2 years
Praying that no contact works for me and I can get my ex back. She left me after 5 amazing years and my heart is well & truly broken.
Me too man. How has it been going for you? We still talked and saw eachother everyday after a month of breakup and finally stopped
@@dandee28 hi mate, hope you’re getting on okay. It’s been 2 months now and still she won’t reach out but I’m coming to terms with the fact that she never will and am starting to look forward to my future. Time is a healer my friend and no contact is a practice to help you heal yourself without them. Take it easy pal
I appreciate the "behind the scenes" demo of what actually happens. Thanks for everything. Was looking fir smth like this for a while.
I’m just in my saul Goodman phase. My love left me and I’ve just poured my energy into no contact and growing my business…and I see no contact working and my business has grown exponentially
I listen to you everyday and this helps my horrible anxiety……Thank you❤
Anyone watching this should buy his emergency breakup kit to support him for all his help!!!! Instead of watching random videos it’s curated in a way that makes sense and really helps you through the breakup process then you can come back and watch these videos.
Thank you. 😌
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂emergency break up kit😂😂😂😂
over 7 months - I was desperate, now I am getting over it. Some days I'm crying like a baby (still) and some days I am feeling stronger. At the beginning I was a wreck!
Getting better now - still sad but alive!
So sorry dear friend 😭😭
❤🙏
One day at a time.
how long you been with them?
@@ravanjanae from 2019 until 2022
I just woke up & found this video effortless! I'm kinda going through something like this. It makes it easier knowing what's going on in the brain. The universe must looking out for me teaching me! Thanxx for the lesson🙄
Love love love the getting fired analogy!
Oh my! I had to kiss you from my phone. You thoroughly described every detail about when the heart is broken and how you recuperate for few days because your body resists the pain . Meaning you start getting used to-the pain or you pass the stage of pain. When you finally cross the border or the shadow of the valley of death you start getting power again while your ex is in agony. This is when the table turns.😍❤🙏🏽 thank you coach Lee
💯🙌🏽🔥🔥🔥💯❤️💰💰💰🏆👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
I will comment on these videos as often as coach Lee posts them.. he is legit, 7 months of no contact, gave her the break up, pursued new hobbies, found new friends traveled alone and created a new life for myself.. the stages the ex goes through is true ! Follow his guidance it the real trick is to do it for YOU. His breakup kit was also a good purchase .. as corny as it sounds or feels. I have no regrets. Coach Lee got me through the hardest emotional times in regards to romance.. he knows what he is talking about and I'll always be grateful 🙏 ❤
M. Alexander, Coach Lee is the best!
This is one of the best videos I've seen on this topic. I was dumped (first time in my life), mostly circumstantial but also I caused him pain with my words- so he left. At first I was begging and pleading for a second chance and apologized numerous times for the pain caused etc. (I was going through the loss of a mother and toxic divorce- I was clearly not my best self but even in that he said I was the most amazing women he'd ever met)
He'd call me like every few days and the last time he did so I didn't answer- he texted yesterday- didn't answer. He's said that he will "talk to" other women in one of our last convos and he needed clarity that I was the one- cool, do that. You don't get to call me every few days and me continue to be available for you- my mindset shifted and this video is the exact extra confirmation I totally made the right choice :)
It’s so true , her previous ex made himself available to her for 3 years by staying in contact with her regularly but she never went back to him and I imagine looked upon him only as a friend who she could get back at any time she wanted.
My ex went back.to.him after 10 years
It makes alot of sense, And I think we all Instinctively know That no contact is the best play. In my situation, I told my ex how much i cared for her but that i also had been unhappy for some time in our relationship and she wasnt the only one, i also asked her if she would like to sit down and and discuss what happened to cause the rupture after 5 yrs together, And even if we couldn't get things back on track, at least we would have a better understanding of what our roles in this was.. She said she was very sorry for everything that had happened, But did not address my question.. That's neither a yes or no, So that triggered me to go into full, no contact.. That's where i've been for nearly a week. It's tough at times but i'm doing it. It kinda comes Down to that old thing that all of our parents and grandparents told us. If you love something, let it go. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours in the first place. Like he said in the video here, your ex nay have someone else in waiting, or maybe not. Its hard to do but you have to let that go in your mind
Lee... dude... u have to be protected by all cost. I dont know what i would do without ur videos.. it helps so much.
Thanks!
The problem is, you have to keep in mind that while there's this "no contact" going on, you Ex is intimately contacting another. That why they left. no one leaves to be alone; they leave into the arms of another. So, if you are OK with that, then fine. Also, when they call back and want you back, it's because the "fling" they left you for didn't work out.
Im in that situation.. mother of my child moving on.. I do want to try no contact but inquire on my child. Best way to go about it.
Yup. Hell she moved away to a place closer to him, if not moved in with him directly. And that was before the breakup after I finally caught on to what she was doing.
I won’t lie, even months later it still hurts. I’ve come to accept it on some level, and if she ever tries to come back she will find I’m no longer there.
Not always it is cheating..
No contact is amazing . Got my ex back!
I remember when I watched your vids 6 months ago I didn’t go no contact I kept trying to reach out and she ghosted me to oblivion. Then I found someone else. And 6 months later I’m completely over my ex. And it feels very good. I doubt my ex will message me again but if she did I wouldn’t give her a chance in hell.
i dont think you should be waiting for your ex to get back in life
just move on with no contact and improve yourselves
things will fall in place at the right time.
Well… my ex turned out to be a narc. I was debating whether he was or wasn’t. The only reason he texted me was to tell me he is doing wonderful (after he broke up with me). Nah, he was trying to tell me he was with someone else. I’m done. If he ever truly comes back, I don’t want someone who doesn’t care about me or my feelings. He broke my heart and lied- he doesn’t care. Never even gave me a reasons why the break up was happening, because he wanted to move on to the next girl. 😢
OCHEERUP, I was with a narc for 5 years. I discarded him. They are TOXIC! NEVER GO BACK WITH A NARC. I'm proud of you for getting away from him! 👍
I'm so sorry about that dear friend ♥️💐🌹
I’m sorry that happened to you
As a widower after 40 years together I never thought I'd be in another relationship but here I am 3 years in.
My partner is loving and has a strong rock of beliefs, very traditional, fun & compliant but equally takes no shit because she has had a hard life.
I know that if we split then we are done because it will be over something fundamental to our relationship. It wont be something petty or anything that we can compromise over.
She won't contact me nor will I contact her. I know this already and accept it, while I'm more willing to compromise i have my red lines too.
We are good together, we respect each other and are forgiving. This gives us strength and resilience but if disrespect crept in on either part, it will be bye and thanks for the good times.
Im grateful that we wont play silly games and strategies to get back together, if we split its going to be over something we can't fix.
It’s a shame that people are so screwed up, that it has to be this way. They can’t just love you cause you’re a great guy. You have play all this mental mind f stuff. And it is all 100% true. I have lived it with one woman several times. Don’t even want her back anymore.. But we connected in a way like I never have with anyone else. I respected and valued what we had. She never did, and I learned after the first couple times, that it works exactly as he says.. Write emails, try and convince them of your love does the opposite. In that moment they could give two shits about what you feel. It’s all about what she feels. So all that talking just annoys her. You walk away, and your value goes up. It’s pretty stupid really. Emotionally immature BS. Maybe one day I’ll meet a woman who isn’t this screwed up that just wants it to be real.. No BS games
Spent a weekend with one recently, known her two years. I’m the only guy that treats her right apparently and her daughter says she should get together with me, she told me she loved me. It’s not enough, she wants someone to argue with, I walk away from all that and would rather talk things through to resolve conflict. I went NC when I got back. The weekend was supposed to be about us getting closer together, it was anything but that. I wouldn’t care if I ever spoke to her again for the way she treated me.
@@richardcollins586 yeah, it’s like until they’re lying in a hospital bed somewhere when they’re old, they just take you for granted. You bond , and come to see the relationship as having much value, and being irreplaceable. That means you sit down together like adults,not go in to some mode where you have to be alone for a week or so as you convince yourself I’m not enough.. I have flaws… Guess what, so did she..That is unrealistic and immature relationship skills. I loved her with all her flaws.. That’s the difference.. I find this especially true of very attractive women, which mine was. The whole point I made clear to her when we first got back together after not seeing her since the 90’s , was I wanted real, and to be able to open up and not hold back. Unfortunately man, that’s the movies, as you kill attraction being too real. You have to keep them chasing and not get too deep. It’s not how I want to live, but I stepped out of being on my game, and I got gut wrenching heartache for it. Best thing you can do is what you did. Good luck to you
It's how woman phycology works to keep her hooked. you must put them on pedestal, strongly disagree with some case, some time bring tears her eye, make her very happy. Those old days are gone where masculine and feminine were respected.
So true bro. Sounds like my story. She played games the whole relationship, I played none. Breakup games, jealousy games, attention games, silent games....took me a while to understand she was very emotionally damaged. A lot of it was her fault and her doing though she will never admit to any wrongdoing of the smallest degree and points the finger at everyone. We were both so incredibly close. That was hard to get past.
Best comment ever! Couldn’t agree! Humans needs to grow up 🎉!
Best relationship expert on the internet. My ex just texted me asking me if I want her back.
I feel so horrible 😢😢 I just want to call her and talk things over..
I've listened to so many videos, I've reflected so much on everything, and this video has literally made everything click. It's hitting the nail on the head
Coach Lee,
You are sincerely the best advice on the internet.
Clear. Concise. No playing games.
I wish I had known all of your wisdom the first time she broke up with me. I didn’t give her the breakup, because it was 100% out of the blue, within a week, I called and asked her “do you love me?” “Yes”. “Do you think I love you?” “Yes”. “Is this what you want?” “No”. And we weren’t broken up anymore.
The second time this happened, 100% out of the blue, I still didn’t know about no contact. Had I employed your strategies, I’d probably be back with her.
But I don’t know if I’d even want that now.
Thank you for your kind words John!
same boat
1 month of NC radio silence no begging and pleading i disappeared like a ghost and he reached out he send me email and text to greet me HBD he said that he missed me, it hits him after i left now we started talking again but i still have to put my guards up and take things slowly. Thanks coach lee watching your video helps me alot❤
I was there never thought ever if I’ll laugh one day . I was crushed I didn’t beg I moved moved until he came back to his senses . Now we are happily married
how long did he take to come back
Thanks for sharing your story ❤
@@CreateUsername483 it took 5 months and I never called him or even checked his social media he came back begging
Starting today, will try to come back in the future for updates. Thanks everyone
Im on day 2 of no contact, i had to distance myself a bit because my ex girlfriend would be very hot and cold with me. I broke up the relationship and then realized it was a mistake now she doesnt know what she wants. These videos help me and are all i look forward too. I even joined the support group. Hopefully i can book a coaching session with Coach Lee once I get paid this week.
It wasnt a mistake, trust your judgement. You deserve better than someone who doesnt know what they want.
I did. the same mistake.. she wanted time and i hadnt give her the time and put her under pressure for 3 weeks and than i break up with her. 1 day later i realised the mistake and told her but she was understandable angry and sad. Now i give her the time and Hope i didnt do to much pressure in the beginning.
Defn not a mistake, although it may feel that way atm. I had the same situation with a come and go girl. Dealing with that is a horror show and you know it. If she gives a fuk, shell put in, if not, its the most destructive thingbin the world to you. Fuk that mate. Look after yourself, work out, find your centre. If youre seeing someone, people are either in or out. Theres no grey there. We ended it yesterday. I was ready but disappointed but knew it was for the best. If youre more unhappy than happy you need to clear the deck, as hard as it is.
Did you go.back.to.her? Did she reach out?
I’ve just started on this journey, it’s so hard, I feel I have to apologise for all my short comings and all the wrongs I’ve done over the years we have spent together. On top of this we are sharing a house we’ve bought together so keeping distance is very hard, neither of us can move out until the house is sold. I’ve been keeping myself away (and so has she) by just trying to not get under each others feet, fortunately there are spare rooms and if she’s cooking or upstairs using the shower and bedroom I just try be elsewhere, I take myself out, just to drive and give more space.
This video has been very helpful and calmed me massively hearing this is the way to do things, I’m sure I’ll return to this and rewatch many times over. Thankyou
After 34 days of radio silence I can’t shake the feeling that my ex doesn’t even care..😞
@@thepaintedcupcake1578 Appreciate the reply. I’ll check that video out.
I believe the title of the video is called: "Is the 30 Day No Contact Rule ENOUGH To Get An Ex Back?"
I hope you are doing okay, in spite of your current circumstances!
Here is my video about that time frame: ruclips.net/video/ySM6veT00FM/видео.html
Thank you for all of your help, Coach Lee! You are much appreciated and valuable to those who are hurting! I hope he will see your reply!
Probably one of the best videos on No contact! 🔥
I always ghost women who break up with me. If they want they can try to get back with me, but breaking up with me is a huge breach of trust and loyalty. So, if she wants to get back to me, she had _better_ make it up to me.
If you get dumped, the chances of her doing it again are much higher.
This is all under the presumption that the person leaving isn't taking antidepressants. They're relieved, but numb. I'd like to see more on that topic please
The narcissist's brain is deranged before no contact, deranged during no contact, and deranged after no contact.
Gone 12 hours no contact and I’m already fearing I’m gonna give in but this vid made me stronger
My man has stayed in relief stage forever. Can't believe that after 5 years I had meant nothing for him. He never asked how am I since. 7 month. Unbearable pain. I know it's all for the best however.
Digital Magic, I'm so sorry for you. Be grateful that someone like that is gone! What kind of a life would you have had if he was still there? Start going out and have some fun. Pick up a good hobby, and make sure you get out of the house. Big hug for you..❤❤⚘️
The pain is the problem, you waiting is the problem, give up on him by giving yourself the value you gave to him. He feels your energy and know you still around. Don't be around give a f* you should honour yourself enough to not care anymore.
If I broke up with someone and they went no contact..I won that is the point of a break up. To get rid of a unwanted relationship. Thanks for preaching this because We don't want begging people. Let my new relationship alone peacefully.
what a video , what a video , coach Lee , perhaps the best coach on the surface of world RUclips family. Listen him , he make us feel so attractive , so confident , so superalpha , so good in our own skin. Thanq so much coach , you're literally helping lives to thriving through hardest phases. Perhaps , the megamegasuperstar in the topic. Experience is everything !!!
What a weird comment
@@sloanmagnum5009 mind own business..stay away..
Appreciate hearing this knowledge, son
I’m going through this phase now. She was still trying to be my “friend” after break up. But I know that was just to make it easier for her. With me, I completely ghost you after we’re done. Blocked on everything
I have to pretty much make it as if you never existed.
Now the other side of this, sometime the person breaking up with you is certain of their decision and the person being broke up with simply has to heal and just learn to move on. I’m the person that got broken I’m with and still, I’m carrying this sadness and weight everyday 😢
Coach Lee ; very great video on this brain; physical manifestation from people in a relationship - especially when you and Ken on a live chat mixed in potential different personalties an ex may have had or still have to go along for the ride; including possible personality disorder symptoms; which this video gives more insight into concepts like stress hormones; and human behavior; and how these can effect people with a variety personalties in different ways; in addition to just a one size fits all human behavior/physical manifestation of the brain from a romantic relationship that broke up (i hope a lot of people watch Ken and your live chats)!
best video coach lee, been broken a few days ago,, while i was having a hard time reaching out videos that could make me feel better, this video is by far the best video both emotionally and strategically. thank you so much…
Best coach ever
He went back to his ex wife after we had an 11 month relationship. I haven’t heard anything from him for over 6 months. He wanted to marry me ! He said he loved me.. After talking and texting everyday “ several”times a day …. nothing 😢 I still cry !
Coach Lee's No Contact worked in my case, a long term relationship of over 6 years severed for someone else to take my place. Took only a little over 2 weeks. I give this advice but for some reason, not everyone will follow it. I like learning more what happened like vasopressin and oxytocin (did not know), plus the cortisol. Buy the break-up kit and follow. My SO has confirmed stuff that Coach Lee has said, admits to being a jerk back then. We now are spending the rest of our lives together and my SO has been awesome for a year after we got back together. We were "friends" for 4 months before I got asked to get back together. (Not the normal situation I understand).
My ex block me n unblock me several times I accept him many times but now it's has been three months no contact and am feeling better n strong until this time I accept that he will never come back am moving on I will be single for a very long time I will be loving myself more until I met the right one for now it's only about me
So thankful I found Coach Lee. I felt my gf slipping away and I chased and it only pushed her away more. She needed time and I wasn’t picking up the clues. Now she has broken up with me to get her space. I have been in NC from day one since she made the breakup official.
Same
I wish I would have known about you to months ago. Every single step you count in your video, I live this to the extreme. Emotional roller coaster.
Your videos helped me out a lot and gave me lot of understanding on how these things work 😎
Has anyone here read the book Attached? It’s a good book and has a lot of good information on the types of attachment. Anxious, secure or avoidance. Figure out which you are and what either your partner is and or what is best suited for you. I highly recommend this to anyone interested
He is so right I remember my ex husband leaving he for another woman. I thought life had enough thru looked so happy . Matching outfits etc. I could t eat I could t sleep 6 months later they ended and he was begging me even stalking me popping up at church etc. I had moved on and was happy. Forgiveness doesn’t require reconnection. I’m going through this again with a current ex and I know soon the tables will turn and if it doesn’t they weren’t for you
I Love your videos Sir my self in a breakup with my Husband it's 4 years now with no contact
Im scare of distance and no contact, im scare that give space to another guy or that she just completly forget me 💔😞
@@jannlewandowski5540 for what??!
meroshango9, I can recommend Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit for you which will help you immensely and make you feel better. totally get how insanely tough it is, and I've been right there in the same boat. You gotta check out Coach Lee's "Emergency Breakup Kit." It's an awesome guide that'll save you from feeling totally lost in this crazy time. It tackles all sorts of situations and gives you strategies you never even considered. You can find it at myexbackcoach.com/ebk. Seriously, I'm rooting for you and hoping it works wonders!
Thanks Lee, you are a one man life saver, listening to you lifts my mood no end! Thank you :)