These comments really show that people don’t know what an emotionally abusive relationship is like. My father treated my mother the same way, first he said she needed to get a job, she did and then he said she needed to stay home. He wanted control of every financial aspect of her life which started so slow she didn’t know how to react until he tried killing her. Unfortunately it is way too common.
What kind of abuser insists their victim has their own money? If you're abusing someone one of the first steps is that you cut off their ability to leave. They didn't ask the relevant questions to determine the situation. She may very well have admitted "my husband pays for everything and I only have to pay for gas and food and I can't afford it because of my crippling spending problem." They didn't ask that, so we don't know, and the problem she called about was left completely by the wayside.
Your mother's story is completely different from this caller's story. She said right at the beginning that he's not abusive. She works a full time job, has her own money that he doesn't touch. Her money is hers and his money is his, per their separate bank accounts. She said that he's rarely home, so that means she mostly buys groceries for herself and the child. And she pays for the gas for her car. Since it's his house that she lives in (rent free) he pays for everything related to the house. If she had to pay a portion to the house, she would've mentioned it. I can tell she lives in HIS house rent free bc she said, "I have to do things a certain way or else he told me I can leave". The truth is most likely this, she got him to marry her (a single mom) by agreeing to separate bank accounts, meanwhile he pays for 80%/90% of the bills, all she pays for is gas and food. Two years into the marriage, she wants to change their agreement because she's unsatisfied that she can't spend more of his money. She's mad that he makes more money than her and she can't spend it, since it's his money, his account.
Was in abusive marriage over 20 years and finance are just the start. She needs to get her and her daughter out. She won't truly know how she's affected AND her daughter until she's out. This isn't a real marriage
I wish I had seen a show like this 2 years into my 30 year marriage to a verbally and emotionally abusive person. I got lost in it for far too long. I have been gone for 8 years and I’m still recovering both physically and mentally.
My wife hasn't had a paycheck in 30 years. That being said she takes care of the finances and I trust her. That's why we got married. We have a net worth over $2M and I've never made over $100K. I don't understand marriages where the money is kept separate.
I have a friend at work who has done the same thing you just said..... the 30 years, wife is a stay at home wife. She has ran them into a half of a million in debt and now he doesn't know if he can put gas in his car to get to work. I would say, it depends on who you marry. Maybe he shouldn't have married her. I'm not saying he should keep money from her either, so don't get me wrong. Just saying that some people can't be trusted with money.
"Are you working full time?" "Yes, but I mean..." I really wish she would have finished that sentence either before or after the hosts cut in. I REALLY wanted to hear why she has a full-time job, access to her own paycheck, and can't afford groceries and necessities. I don't mean that in a cynical way, either, it could be totally legit (most of it goes toward the mortgage/utilities/other shared living expenses). I just wish we heard more about the financial side of things.
Yeah my money and our money. Except he's not playing the our money game and she doesn't like it. So it's abusive. I'm surprised we didn't get "toxic" thrown in there for good measure.
@@sonjailic5770 Her current husband is not the father to her child. He might feel she needs to take care of her daughter solely and doesn't want to contribute to her expenses, unfortunately, that was never discussed.
Yes GET OUT! I was in a similar situation. Our children would hide when they knew their father was coming home from work as you never knew what mood he was in. My ex’s family came to my home threatening me because I told the rest of his extended family that he he’d been abusing me. They called me a liar because I exposed these good “CHRISTIANS” for supporting an abuser. When I first told his immediate family what was happening , looking for help/guidance,they simply said to “Pray about it” fifteen years later it only stopped when I exposed the family on the Internet . It doesn’t get better. The verbal abuse turns to emotional , to physical , and then to death.
What this man is doing is absolutely abusive. He knows she doesn't have money for food and he doesn't give her 50 bucks? Get real! Just because you've had a bad woman in your life doesn't mean there aren't bad guys out there
@@lauvasquez7198 Nonetheless, she agreed to it, so she can't go back and expect a change two years into the marriage. If she's unsatisfied with the agreement, she can always leave.
For the first time I can say both Delony and George made mistakes, first they didn't ask who pays the bills? What is her contribution and why did they agree not to share their finances? It's ridiculous when people are just making it a man as a bad person before actually getting the facts straight. Poor advice today guys.
Agree. They are not counselors or therapist on relationships. Get to the money issues then tell her she need to get help and leave. She walk away with no financial advice Delony need to work at crisis services.
@@reese85 Just from what she's saying. It sounds like he is mostly the problem. But there's sides to every story. You should not automatically believe one side.
Production Team: "John is on the show...Please queue up the word 'safe'..." When you see John's face on the thumbnail, you know he's going to make sure that the caller is "SAFE."
@@Globewanderer000 Not at all. Especially in this video. But there are certain videos where he overuses "safe." I listen to figure our how he's going to shoehorn it in.
If she works full time and doesn’t pay bills, you have to wonder why gas/groceries can’t be paid. Where does her money go? You need both sides of the story rather than a pitty story. Could’ve been agreed upon prior to being married due to crazy spending issues/debt she has previously.
@@silentnot4812 Probably doesn't get any or if she does, that is HER money. I can hear the delusion and manipulation on how she speaks...this woman is up to no good because she didn't get the $$$ she wanted when she married him
NOPE!. Seems as tho you have taken this personally. And if you r saying this, then it means that EVERY CALLER should have the other party on the line. So you are indirectly trying to dissuade ppl those situations for even calling or reaching out for help. You are missing gaslighting. Not only that, if the other person comes on the line, he may abuse her right after the call
No grown person should have or exert that level on control or another grown person. ..of the adult is truly clinically or medically unable to take of themselves, ...that is different. But she seems sane and in her right mind. DONT TRY TO DENT WHAT U HAVE HEARD
I had a friend in the same situation. By the time their first child was 10, they had a physical fight because he was mentally abusing their daughter. By the time the daughter was 17 she had to leave because he attacked the daughter
We def gotta hear the guys side of the story! Cuz if she’s only responsible for gas and groceries, what’s the big deal?she can’t cover that of a full time salary?
She is suggesting that what she makes isnt enough, so maybe her paycheck all goes to one or two bills but there isnt any left for groceries where as his side of the bills are paid and he has extra he wont give her...she should just not have dinner for him for a few days to see how that works out lol..
As a Christian who has been in a similar situation get out, move on. God wants you to have an abundant life. I wish I would've left sooner soon behaviors wouldn't have been shown to my son. It's hard I know, and others will not get it. Pack a bag and hide it while you plan your exit. Leave a letter to avoid the explosive exchange. Be brave and show your daughter a better way. She deserves a better example. I saw a Christian therapist a year before I left. I now have a marriage others dream of. They get worse with age these personality types who need control.
Here is what 'I' think she isn't telling. RIGHT AFTER the honeymoon, she starts spending, bc HER money is HER money and HIS money is HER money, he says the most TOXIC, ABUSIVE thing ever to a woman..."NO" Now she wants to paint him as abusive and these two tools are complicit in perhaps ruining a man's life and livelihood,,,but the man put himself in this position, you NEVER marry a single mom...ever, ever EVER
Never, never ever, did I already say never, marry a single mum. And never trust these 304s fully. They play the victims if it gives them any advantage. Don´t let the crocodile tears fool you. Protect yourself no matter what. One minute these 304s say they are strong and independent and the next second they play the victim.
I’m sorry.. but did you miss the part about their finances not being combined and her having her own accounts with a full time income of her own ? Somethings off about this story, I think we need to hear both sides before making judgments because I feel like we are missing a lot of details here.
A. They agreed to not combine finances B. She has her own bank account with her own full time income C. Delony is casting the husband as an abuser with only one side of the story (her side of it sounding very off and lacking in detail) I don’t get it.. he won’t give her money for groceries and gas but she pays no bills AND has her own money ?? This whole thing makes no sense! John and George failed to ask the right questions! I’m very disappointed.. learn how to host or get off the air.
@@aolvaar8792 She only pays for groceries and gas. She says the house is his, he pays all the bills relating to the house. She even said he wants things done a certain way and if she doesn't like it, then she can leave. That implies she lives in HIS house rent free, he pays for mortgage, electric, water, insurance, etc. She's got a full time job (money that he doesn't touch), she can choose to leave at any time.
@@costco_pizza So, are you saying that being a man is all about paying bills for a woman? So being a man is like being an ATM for a woman, otherwise he's not useful? So a man's purpose in life is to be an ATM for a woman?
It's fine for a psychologist to determine if his "patient" is safe as a priority, but they jumped WAY too quick to suspect abuse. This is a finance show, ask the finance questions. She has a job, does she have a budget? Why can't she afford gas/groceries, which surely should be the first things she budgets for whether she has to do it with a joint or solo income? If he was so financially abusive, why wouldn't he insist on keeping her paycheck or refuse to let her get a job so she's dependent on him? The only info we've heard is he evidently doesn't trust her to share finances, she earns her own money he doesn't touch, he earns alot more, and yet she can't even afford basics. Where is her money going? What is he paying for? Why doesn't he trust her?
They always blame the guy in every call. The caller can come right out and say she’s bad with money, works full time doesn’t pay bills and still spends all her money, and they still find a way to blame him. They literally agreed before marriage that she was bad with money and would not share accounts. Again, they blame the man. She also has a kid from another marriage and wants access to the new husbands money.
Jon's advice is correct though that she needs to leave. If she's feeling afraid, there must be something deeper than just the money. Him threatening to kick her out as well when they're married is absurd.
I don’t know what call you were listening to but this wasn’t about money. The relationship is toxic bordering on abusive emotionally and mentally. Though it may not have progressed to physical abuse yet there is a pattern that is emerging and has very little if any to do with money.
They decided to keep their finances separate but now she wants access to his money when that was not what they agreed on. Am I missing something? If it's his house he is also in the right to kick her out and divorce her if he doesn't like her behavior. This doesn't seem abusive at all. She needs to be held accountable for getting into a situation where she has no leverage. If roles were reversed we would all roast the guy for being stupid enough to put himself in that situation.
Yes, you are missing a very big deal...they decided to keep their finances separate so why her husband is eating food she buys without putting any dime to it and telling to her that she can't handle the money. My guess is man is not having any money and this woman pays the house too. Thats why her account is empty all the time.
For all we know, the guy could be paying the rent/mortgage with his money while she has the responsibility of groceries. He probably agreed to keep finances separate since he makes so much more than her + she has a child from a previous relationship. There's simply not enough info to say that this guy is financially abusive.
This is a roommate situation he's paying all those things because it's HIS house. He's not there he basically doesn't see value on her to provide food for her.
Sounds like she found a dude who makes bank, and she wanted a piece of that pie for her & her baby. She doesn't want to leave. She wants access to his money.
You didn't ask her questions and jumped to conclusions. What's household income? What are her debts? Why can't she afford gas and groceries on a full time income?
Dude is probably paying all the bills for the house, besides groceries, for her and her kid that isn't his. I dont blame him for being cautious, women brought this on themselves based on how guys are treated in court. Keep doing your thing my guy.
Hey my mortgage company is toxic and abusive because I agreed to pay for this house and signed on the dotted line but now several years into it I don’t like the terms and conditions anymore so I’m trying to renegotiate but they’re threatening to foreclose on me and put me out. What should I do? I don’t feel safe. I think it may escalate to physical abuse when the sheriff deputy comes to evict me.
Money issues need to be discussed before marriage. He’s an abuser.He’s threatening to throw her out over money issues and other things. Making a vow does not excuse his abusive behavior.
I've been watching the show for a while; the main problem that commenters have is with the inability to of the personalities to ask the right questions before giving advice. People want Dave because he asks the pertinent questions. If you don't already do it, perhaps some training from Dave, or revisiting calls for trying purposes would help?
Spot on. These mellinial aged hosts don't ask the basic question ramsey would. Instead you got DeLoney asking every woman if thier safe because the husband set some boundaries in the relationship
@@simonthebroken9691 "he does control everything, not just money", "he told me I haven't proven myself", "he threatened to put me out" yeah you right, looks good to me! 🤡 any other words of wisdom you wanna add, Simon?
@@thexorode You're only getting one person's side. I didn't say she was lying. How do you know what's true. Do you have a relationship with both parties?
I think he wants to make sure he doesn’t pay a penny for a child that isn’t his. And trying to make sure she works and pays for herself and for her daughter and doesn’t depend on his money. And yes she shouldn’t depend on him for groceries or anything. She works full time! So how can she not afford these things. She shouldn’t depend on him for these things. What if she never met him and she was single?? I do agree they shouldn’t have separate bank accounts tho.
That's just weird...she shouldn't depend on him for groceries? It's not about depending on, it's about 2 people who are married or living together who both need groceries in the home.
I am a woman. I see a desperate woman. She wanted to be married so she was afraid to be honest with this man and speak out. She is not being totally fair to this man. I love my daddy Dave Ramsey but this here is not fair to her husband . Listen carefully, she said they agreed to keep finances separate before they got married ? How would any woman agree to marry a man and to do 50/50 with a man who makes four times her income ? This man has his issues but as a woman to put all the blame on this man is unfair. So how is this financial abuse? Secondly she has a daughter before she met him. Okay what conversations were held concerning this child that is not his? As for emotional abuse, I have to dig deep? Was this man doing a job that he had to be away for long periods before they got married? You see people fall in love, become sexually active without a ring , when the adrenaline falls off and reality hits , they cannot handle the truth and want to blame the other party. What conversations they did have? Did they go to see a professional licensed marriage counselor before marriage to bring all these things in the table and see if they could handle everything? . If they had gone to see a therapist, those people are trained they dig deep to and are raw. It is not late. This marriage can be revived with a lot of unlearning and relearning and professional help.
Initially, when she said she agreed to separate bank accounts, I thought it was because SHE didn't want joint finances, because she had a full time job. I get that. Merging finances can be a difficult adjustment to make. But then it turns out it was his idea, because he makes more money. He's not committed to her or this relationship. Others have said we need to hear his side. Maybe. Maybe they need to go for counseling. If he doesn't go, she needs to move on. They're not saying it's easy. And I'm still not buying her reasons for her reluctance to leave the marriage.
How much gas and groceries does she buy? So much that she needs to go into debt? The guy could be at his wits end. Before the knights in shining armor jump in, they might need to know the whole situation.
Young men, listen to this call very very carefully, especially the beginning. She says they agreed before they got married not to share accounts. Then she listens to Dave Ramsey and now wants to share accounts. Those are two facts. We have right off the bat in addition to that, she has a child from someone else and she works full-time. Those are other facts. Notice how the entire conversation is framed around his actions and not those facts. This is a perfect example of how society works now if you’re the man you’re responsible for all negative outcomes. Treat women with respect and kindness, but never ever get married. Good luck.
I kind of completely agree when you look from the other perspectives. She chose what she wanted and now she regrets it. Now she's struggling because of her own choices of being a individual instead of a team player. The husband doesn't seem like from her perspective of course, he wants to be in this marriage. It probably started the year after they got married that he lost interest in her because of her full-time job and not being a housewife. To each their own but don't make the other seem like the bad person
@@memphistiger4647 The Ramsey Network used to try and uplift everyone. Dave was rough but he was equally rough. The latest iterations of their talent is decidedly anti male which is unfortunate. It's baffling to me why Ramsey chose this course, men in the U.S. have very few resources to help them at a time when they under the most pressure from all sides. They had a great opportunity to reach out and address mens issues.
It came out as they don't share finances. She is knowing only her part which was 60 000 and man is not sharing his paycheck and is not paying anything. She stays in this "marriage" because she is one of those women who are thinking marriage is must to have. She may even own the house but is afraid that man is leaving her if she is not doing what he says she needs to do.
It’s more to this story. She stated she’s bad with money and has a full time job. I think they just convinced her she’s a victim of abuse and she initially didn’t feel that way at the start. I don’t want to be insensitive if she is being abused but there are a lot of unanswered questions about her situation imo
John is too busy playing psychic. He cares more about guessing what's going on than really hearing the truth. He'd rather validate his own ego on air than get the real details. Why does he always need to guess what's going on? He could literally ask one direct question and hear the answer instead of leading her to his conclusion on air with millions listening.
@@barbaramartorana1598 It's his house, if she doesn't like it, she can always leave. He even told her she can leave. What kind of a woman stays with a man like that? Where's her self respect?
@@terriesmith2616 What a blessing it is that you’ve never dealt with a man who will come find you or hurt you if you actually do leave. Many of us wish to be that blessed in life. I pray you keep living a life that keeps you ignorant on this subject. ❤
I'm in a situation where I cant trust my wife with money because she has been and continues to be irresponsible with money. This does not sound like an abusive situation to me, it sounds like a husband who is tired of seeing money squandered and used irresponsably. I can relate. Sometimes enough is enough.
At no point is anything said that indicates she is squandering money but we do hear that he withholds money for basics like food and gas AND that he THREATENS to kick her out of the house if the beds are not made to his standards and you take his side? He threatens to kick her out for not making the beds according to his grand wishes and you do not see abuse? Financial witholding is abuse, by law, by definition, and no amount of "justifying" it makes it okay. You are right about one thing, enough is enough.
I know someone who has to eat rice and beans at work while the wife is buying stuff with his money. He works hard but on payday, the money is gone before he can get to it. Guys, protect your freedom especially if she’s a big spender.
I have a cousin whose husband gives her nothing from his paycheck. She pays for all the household bills and asks him to contribute if she runs out of her own money. He spends his money on toys, gambling, cigarettes. It’s crazy.
These hosts are way too in love with the sounds of their own voices and afraid of uncomfortable silences. Notice Dave will sit and wait without saying anything to get a complete answer.
Me and my wife live by the Hudson river with the beautiful view of midtown Manhattan, I make four to five times my wife. I pay for our enormous rent, electric, both cars and Insurances. The least my wife, who has a full time job can do... Is buy groceries and gas up her own vehicle. Of course when we go on vacations or trips, I pay for everything But It's almost a nuisance or an insult if she asks me for money for groceries or gas .... 🤔🤔
@@texasrodeogirl3814 Most women are so brainwashed by feminism that they believe men and women are equal. As a man you can´t trust these women. Never ever. If a man can´t find a real women and marries a feminist one, he has to protect himself or gets rect.
“I just want a stable life for my daughter…” Even though the husband threatens to put her out, tells her she hasn’t earned anything, etc. Man-these women are seriously broken to think this environment is “stable” for a child. They shave so little self-worth that they can’t see how toxic this is and would endure it and keep their children in it because they are scared to be alone. So sad and maddening.
Halfway through and I'm very confused. She has her own wage so why are they not asking how much they each make/contribute? She could be an irresponsible spender with entitlement issues. I'm not normally one to agree with the crowd who think they always blame the man but this kind of seems that way.
@@jdtreharne Oh really? I didn't catch that at all. Well that does make it more likely she's being treated unfairly in the marriage, but they still should at least ask what they both spend on and why they don't have a joint account or if there's any reason he doesn't want to give her money.
The man probably pays for almost everything, I want to know what does she contribute to their family other than being in a another man’s child to a relationship. I think the man is the one that is being used.
I mean if you've ever been married, you know what you're walking into BEFORE getting married. I'm sure this didn't happen overnight. Same on his end if this is true. And we all know there's 3 sides to every story so...everyone just needs to take responsibility for their situation. Leave. Stay. Get help. Don't. But dang if you made a decision, sit in it and don't complain or do something about it. Geez! 🤷🏾♀️ who's here for taking action in 2023?!? 🤚🏾
I beg to differ. I didn’t know when I married my husband that he would always keep his heart closed and refuse to be vulnerable, to the point where his body is reacting and now he wants out of the marriage. I didn’t know that the fact we never fought was a bad sign. Don’t blame her. I’m sure she didn’t know.
@R Ann Green Great...exactly my point. Sounds like the decision was made. You're divorced..so you're no longer in the situation. Hope you learned something and can move on. 🤷🏾♀️
@Luna Bella I love how commenters contine to support my point and it's funny how expecting people to be responsible for their behavior and the moves they make in life is problematic. Again for the people in the back... EITHER STAY OR GO. Make a decision! Also, I have actually been is several abusive relationships, especially as a young woman. And AGAIN I take full responsibility for attracting those people, staying too long, etc. That was MY decision to take responsibility. If you wanna dwell in victimhood, fine. If that vindicates you to sympathize, 👍🏾. But being an angry keyboard warrior with no picture to respond about something that triggered you is not the answer. Get help, or stay and don't complain.
I hope this woman takes her child and runs away from this marriage as fast as she can. That was the voice of a woman who is living in fear. Nobody - nobody - should have to live that way.
Fear? Listen again when they ask WHY she is staying and hasn't left yet...it is the money and lifestyle. She married him for money and to be the simp step dad...he refused to play ball
My husband and I have totally separate accounts. I live in his house rent free and he pays for all expenses. I keep all my pay cheques and spend it as I wish, I am very happy .
That exact thing happened to a friend of mine. After the divorce, she told us she didn't even have money for feminine hygiene products. He wouldn't give her anything. He was an evil man who looked good on the outside to all the friends
I have an income but I took on recurring bills because he is not dependable and I had to take care of my children. I am afraid I won't have enough money to live and I'm afraid to say anything to him. It's scary!
Yeah all we got out of this is he's a big meanie and I'm a victim of my own decisions. Any money he does not want to support Chad's spawn. Any money she has proven herself financially irresponsible in his eyes. He apparently told her upfront you handle your expenses. Now she doesn't like that so it's abusive. We know nothing here. Income? Expenses? Debts? Child support from Chad? What is his share of the load? What is her share? He's not beating her so it's not a physical problem. Is he verbal? Or is all this over "you pay for your kid and car and I'll pay everything else". Boys, don't marry women with other men's children. Find one you can sire your own kids with, and build a life together. Being a stepdad is a losing proposition, seen it personally and hear about it all the time. And women, don't marry into situations you are not comfortable with. How many times do we hear He told me blah blah and I accepted it and now I don't like it.
But she has her Netflix, hair and makeup, her kid has roof and 3x meals a day but she wants that Gucci bag & to show off her wealth to her 'friends' (that she hates & hate her) on Instagram but he won't let her. He is so toxic and abusive, right?
It is funny to hear when she says MY daughter and MY child, the guy probably has no word at home, the sooner she leaves the better for the guy, she needs to start taking responsibility for her actions and the guys in general needs to stop dating single moms.
God had nothing to do with this and you are too late. Pray that women choose the right guy to be Baby Daddy so they won't have to scramble to find Mr. ATM to marry. I am on this man's side...never raise another man's child
@@davecopp9356 It’s a terrible situation for any two persons to find themselves in period. It doesn’t matter what side you are viewing it from. Both parties involved made a terrible decision when they decided to get together because it’s obvious based on the few details given, that neither one came into it for love. God made marriage very clear. Husband to love their wife like God love the church and for wives to submit to their husband as they would onto God. If both had discernment when choosing a life partner her reasoning wouldn’t be because she wants to make sure her child is financially secure as she so bravely stated in her call. As for the husband I am not sure what his reasons for marrying her was because he was not there to speak on the matter but it’s clear he doesn’t trust her enough to allow her to have access to other finances.. That in its self is a problem… This has already happened so they can’t go back but others can learn from it. Hence why my original post said “let your children have discernment when choosing a life partner.” Any two persons involve needs to have discernment. Not just the one who’s fault it may appear to be. Have a blessed day🙏
I personally do not see what the Dr. is seeing. How is she in an unsafe place? She has a full time job and is responsible for gas and groceries. Sounds like a good deal to me. What have I missed?
The two in the video are simps and fell for the women playing the victim and answered out of emotion and feelings without logic. Dave is the same. Always blaming the man in such cases. She agreed to separate bank accounts before the marriage and what she has to pay. Now she wants to renogiate and to have more leverage is painting a picture of unsafety and him as a bad guy. The guy is a saint for taking in a single mother.
Every woman should know about finance and have a way to make money no matter what as a safety net in case the husband turns abusive after marriage, which happens often.
This poor girl thinks that she needs to sacrifice herself on the alter of his displeasure in order to fulfill her vows! What a sad powerless place she puts herself in. 😢
I believe each person should have their own accounts. And a joint account to pay common bills ... mortgage or rent, utilities, groceries ... to which account each puts in a proportionate amount. In this case, he contributes 4x what she does as he makes 4x her salary.
In the words of Kevin Samuels, there is no honor in being a step-father. George and Delony really disappointed in this call, especially George cause it's expected from Delony, but for George to simp that hard, not cool.
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"If something's not done the way he wants it, he will threaten to put me out"
That one line says it all. Put this dude in the rearview mirror honey
This was my life.
Don't most husband has this done to them all the time?
Jane...take your daughter and get out. You can't fix this and he has already broken your vows. Just leave.
yes please just leave!
These comments really show that people don’t know what an emotionally abusive relationship is like. My father treated my mother the same way, first he said she needed to get a job, she did and then he said she needed to stay home. He wanted control of every financial aspect of her life which started so slow she didn’t know how to react until he tried killing her. Unfortunately it is way too common.
Doesn’t sound like your mother situation at all cuz she works and keeps her own money!
What kind of abuser insists their victim has their own money? If you're abusing someone one of the first steps is that you cut off their ability to leave.
They didn't ask the relevant questions to determine the situation. She may very well have admitted "my husband pays for everything and I only have to pay for gas and food and I can't afford it because of my crippling spending problem." They didn't ask that, so we don't know, and the problem she called about was left completely by the wayside.
Your mother's story is completely different from this caller's story.
She said right at the beginning that he's not abusive. She works a full time job, has her own money that he doesn't touch. Her money is hers and his money is his, per their separate bank accounts.
She said that he's rarely home, so that means she mostly buys groceries for herself and the child. And she pays for the gas for her car.
Since it's his house that she lives in (rent free) he pays for everything related to the house. If she had to pay a portion to the house, she would've mentioned it. I can tell she lives in HIS house rent free bc she said, "I have to do things a certain way or else he told me I can leave".
The truth is most likely this, she got him to marry her (a single mom) by agreeing to separate bank accounts, meanwhile he pays for 80%/90% of the bills, all she pays for is gas and food. Two years into the marriage, she wants to change their agreement because she's unsatisfied that she can't spend more of his money. She's mad that he makes more money than her and she can't spend it, since it's his money, his account.
I think she is just saying her dad controlled her moms ability to make or not make money.
100%
Was in abusive marriage over 20 years and finance are just the start. She needs to get her and her daughter out. She won't truly know how she's affected AND her daughter until she's out. This isn't a real marriage
@Write_me15 who am I talking with?
Was in an abusive marriage for 40 years, I didn't leave because he always told me I was stupid and didn't know anything. I believed him
I wish I had seen a show like this 2 years into my 30 year marriage to a verbally and emotionally abusive person. I got lost in it for far too long. I have been gone for 8 years and I’m still recovering both physically and mentally.
My wife hasn't had a paycheck in 30 years. That being said she takes care of the finances and I trust her. That's why we got married. We have a net worth over $2M and I've never made over $100K. I don't understand marriages where the money is kept separate.
How did you do it, was it investment over a long period of time
Wow, what a wonderful wife
I have a friend at work who has done the same thing you just said..... the 30 years, wife is a stay at home wife. She has ran them into a half of a million in debt and now he doesn't know if he can put gas in his car to get to work. I would say, it depends on who you marry. Maybe he shouldn't have married her. I'm not saying he should keep money from her either, so don't get me wrong. Just saying that some people can't be trusted with money.
I feeling your pain 😢 i know exactly what she's talking about...
"Are you working full time?" "Yes, but I mean..." I really wish she would have finished that sentence either before or after the hosts cut in. I REALLY wanted to hear why she has a full-time job, access to her own paycheck, and can't afford groceries and necessities. I don't mean that in a cynical way, either, it could be totally legit (most of it goes toward the mortgage/utilities/other shared living expenses). I just wish we heard more about the financial side of things.
She's paying the utilities
Exactly, I’m confused by how this doesn’t add up. She has all her money.::
Yeah my money and our money. Except he's not playing the our money game and she doesn't like it. So it's abusive. I'm surprised we didn't get "toxic" thrown in there for good measure.
True! I also wanted to hear what she had to say.
@@sonjailic5770 Her current husband is not the father to her child. He might feel she needs to take care of her daughter solely and doesn't want to contribute to her expenses, unfortunately, that was never discussed.
Yes GET OUT! I was in a similar situation. Our children would hide when they knew their father was coming home from work as you never knew what mood he was in. My ex’s family came to my home threatening me because I told the rest of his extended family that he he’d been abusing me. They called me a liar because I exposed these good “CHRISTIANS” for supporting an abuser. When I first told his immediate family what was happening , looking for help/guidance,they simply said to “Pray about it” fifteen years later it only stopped when I exposed the family on the Internet . It doesn’t get better. The verbal abuse turns to emotional , to physical , and then to death.
Dave needed to answer this call. He would have asked the right questions.
Yep
yeah they butchered this call for sure
Agree. What is he responsible paying for financially, and what is she responsible for if they have separate bank accounts.
This therapist is spot on! Listen to him!!!! Do not stay because of a vow.
I think hearing both sides of the story is wise before jumping to a conclusion.
Definitely for this call
They don't care about both sides. Didn't you hear the news? Apparently women are incapable of lying or not giving all the facts.
I’ve heard all I need to hear. The husband needs to man up and pay the bills. That’s what being a man is all about.
Having been in that type of marriage I believe her. She is not even telling all of the craziness. It is so embarrassing.
It seems like he'll just add excuses and just blame her.
She needs to see a lawyer in secret get a safe place secured then leave when he’s not home. Have her pay deposited in new account to
Be safe.
Husband: you gotta be responsible with money.
Dr. Boloney: are you safe?
Doctor baloney likes to say are you safe and to make women into some domestic violence victim out of nothing
Glad I'm not the only one who was confused by that random, useless question.
@@dexterjuan the guy doesn’t know any finance, I have no idea why he is on the show. Thumbs down from me on this video.
Maloney is starting to parody himself. John not every guy is on the verge of hitting his wife.
What this man is doing is absolutely abusive. He knows she doesn't have money for food and he doesn't give her 50 bucks? Get real! Just because you've had a bad woman in your life doesn't mean there aren't bad guys out there
We never think it will happen to us! Prayers to you!
The first thing she says is they agreed not to combine finances for some reason. Why didn’t they ask why?
"I agreed to not sharing a bank account"
"THEY" implies they came to together on this.
She agreed with his plan.
I bet it was more his idea and she just said ok because the alternative was to break up.
@@lauvasquez7198 at the end of the day, she agreed to it
@@lauvasquez7198
Nonetheless, she agreed to it, so she can't go back and expect a change two years into the marriage. If she's unsatisfied with the agreement, she can always leave.
Dave or Rachel would have seen this as a huge red flag
My sister is a narcissistic gaslighter. Enough said. 😢
For the first time I can say both Delony and George made mistakes, first they didn't ask who pays the bills? What is her contribution and why did they agree not to share their finances? It's ridiculous when people are just making it a man as a bad person before actually getting the facts straight. Poor advice today guys.
Agree. They are not counselors or therapist on relationships. Get to the money issues then tell her she need to get help and leave. She walk away with no financial advice Delony need to work at crisis services.
@@LisaCPerry Of course. They just jump to conclusions.
@@jimmymcgill6778 I agree with you this time! The man blaming was heavy in this one
@@reese85 Just from what she's saying. It sounds like he is mostly the problem.
But there's sides to every story.
You should not automatically believe one side.
Yep, I've heard Dave be more harsh with callers than this lady's husband has been to her.
Production Team: "John is on the show...Please queue up the word 'safe'..." When you see John's face on the thumbnail, you know he's going to make sure that the caller is "SAFE."
Is that a bad thing?
@@Globewanderer000 Not at all. Especially in this video. But there are certain videos where he overuses "safe." I listen to figure our how he's going to shoehorn it in.
It’s blows me away the way people live out there. Just sad
I believe her and agree this is not healthy regardless of what her spending habits might be. That relationship situation is toxic.
What a nightmare.
If she works full time and doesn’t pay bills, you have to wonder why gas/groceries can’t be paid. Where does her money go? You need both sides of the story rather than a pitty story. Could’ve been agreed upon prior to being married due to crazy spending issues/debt she has previously.
If this is all the truth, then she needs to just leave. No point in marrying someone who is your dad.
@@bulls-nation5783 I agree.She needs a man who is just as irresponsible as she is.
@@bulls-nation5783 HAHAHA, a woman tells the whole truth in a relationship...wait...HAHAHAHA
@@silentnot4812 Probably doesn't get any or if she does, that is HER money. I can hear the delusion and manipulation on how she speaks...this woman is up to no good because she didn't get the $$$ she wanted when she married him
She probably has to pay her own bills.
Get the husband on the line. Let’s hear his side before casting him as an abuser.
Seems only fair!
NOPE!. Seems as tho you have taken this personally.
And if you r saying this, then it means that EVERY CALLER should have the other party on the line.
So you are indirectly trying to dissuade ppl those situations for even calling or reaching out for help.
You are missing gaslighting.
Not only that, if the other person comes on the line, he may abuse her right after the call
No grown person should have or exert that level on control or another grown person.
..of the adult is truly clinically or medically unable to take of themselves, ...that is different.
But she seems sane and in her right mind.
DONT TRY TO DENT WHAT U HAVE HEARD
Don't control people
There we go. Top comment to the misogynist.
I had a friend in the same situation. By the time their first child was 10, they had a physical fight because he was mentally abusing their daughter. By the time the daughter was 17 she had to leave because he attacked the daughter
The financial control was only the beginning
If she works why can't she buy groceries or gas? These guys need to get to the root of the problem
We def gotta hear the guys side of the story! Cuz if she’s only responsible for gas and groceries, what’s the big deal?she can’t cover that of a full time salary?
Exactly. What on Earth is she spending her full time money on that she is going into debt over gas and groceries?
She is suggesting that what she makes isnt enough, so maybe her paycheck all goes to one or two bills but there isnt any left for groceries where as his side of the bills are paid and he has extra he wont give her...she should just not have dinner for him for a few days to see how that works out lol..
Agreed. Besides, she started the call by saying separate accounts is the way to go
@@cutlerylover she would’ve said her checks went to a certain bill or not but instead said groceries and gas and that he makes 4x as much as her
As a Christian who has been in a similar situation get out, move on. God wants you to have an abundant life. I wish I would've left sooner soon behaviors wouldn't have been shown to my son. It's hard I know, and others will not get it. Pack a bag and hide it while you plan your exit. Leave a letter to avoid the explosive exchange. Be brave and show your daughter a better way. She deserves a better example. I saw a Christian therapist a year before I left. I now have a marriage others dream of. They get worse with age these personality types who need control.
Good advice!
Many women are killed during the exit.
Please keep us posted on this story
They telling her to leave and know very little about what’s going on. She didn’t provide a lot of details.
This is all weird. Makes no sense. I don’t agree with no combining finances. Why did you get married then. But where is her paycheck going?
Here is what 'I' think she isn't telling. RIGHT AFTER the honeymoon, she starts spending, bc HER money is HER money and HIS money is HER money, he says the most TOXIC, ABUSIVE thing ever to a woman..."NO" Now she wants to paint him as abusive and these two tools are complicit in perhaps ruining a man's life and livelihood,,,but the man put himself in this position, you NEVER marry a single mom...ever, ever EVER
Geez she has to feed/clothe her child , pull-ups/diapers , etc, car gas/repairs etc etc etc . . And she doesn’t make much . . What do you Not get??
yes indeed nothing wrong with keeping the finances separately even if one is married!
forgot to say if I were married I would control my own money
sometimes vows must be broken! no matter what!
My heart HURTS for her. He has broken her down so much, she’s scared to be without him. I fear she won’t leave, but I pray that she does! ♥️
Scared that she can't have his money...this is why men shouldn't marry single moms
@@TheImapotato women just don’t get it man.
Never, never ever, did I already say never, marry a single mum. And never trust these 304s fully. They play the victims if it gives them any advantage. Don´t let the crocodile tears fool you. Protect yourself no matter what. One minute these 304s say they are strong and independent and the next second they play the victim.
I’m sorry.. but did you miss the part about their finances not being combined and her having her own accounts with a full time income of her own ? Somethings off about this story, I think we need to hear both sides before making judgments because I feel like we are missing a lot of details here.
@@TheImapotato It doesn’t matter…she doesn’t deserve the treatment. What a weird way to think. Praying for some compassion to enter your heart.
A. They agreed to not combine finances
B. She has her own bank account with her own full time income
C. Delony is casting the husband as an abuser with only one side of the story (her side of it sounding very off and lacking in detail)
I don’t get it.. he won’t give her money for groceries and gas but she pays no bills AND has her own money ?? This whole thing makes no sense! John and George failed to ask the right questions! I’m very disappointed.. learn how to host or get off the air.
she pays no bills?
The goal is to ALWAYS victimize women and blame the husband. ALWAYS
@@aolvaar8792
She only pays for groceries and gas. She says the house is his, he pays all the bills relating to the house. She even said he wants things done a certain way and if she doesn't like it, then she can leave. That implies she lives in HIS house rent free, he pays for mortgage, electric, water, insurance, etc.
She's got a full time job (money that he doesn't touch), she can choose to leave at any time.
@@terriesmith2616 he has to pay all the bills, that’s what being a man is all about.
@@costco_pizza
So, are you saying that being a man is all about paying bills for a woman? So being a man is like being an ATM for a woman, otherwise he's not useful?
So a man's purpose in life is to be an ATM for a woman?
It's fine for a psychologist to determine if his "patient" is safe as a priority, but they jumped WAY too quick to suspect abuse. This is a finance show, ask the finance questions. She has a job, does she have a budget? Why can't she afford gas/groceries, which surely should be the first things she budgets for whether she has to do it with a joint or solo income? If he was so financially abusive, why wouldn't he insist on keeping her paycheck or refuse to let her get a job so she's dependent on him?
The only info we've heard is he evidently doesn't trust her to share finances, she earns her own money he doesn't touch, he earns alot more, and yet she can't even afford basics. Where is her money going? What is he paying for? Why doesn't he trust her?
They always blame the guy in every call. The caller can come right out and say she’s bad with money, works full time doesn’t pay bills and still spends all her money, and they still find a way to blame him. They literally agreed before marriage that she was bad with money and would not share accounts.
Again, they blame the man. She also has a kid from another marriage and wants access to the new husbands money.
Jon's advice is correct though that she needs to leave. If she's feeling afraid, there must be something deeper than just the money. Him threatening to kick her out as well when they're married is absurd.
I don’t know what call you were listening to but this wasn’t about money. The relationship is toxic bordering on abusive emotionally and mentally.
Though it may not have progressed to physical abuse yet there is a pattern that is emerging and has very little if any to do with money.
You aren’t lying lol. The wives can’t manage their money or debt, but if the husband sets boundaries, he’s the tyrant or “financial abuser.”
All businesses all TV all commercials cater to women is Flawless angelic creatures
That simp mentality is something else
At no point did they ask about the money specifics. What is her income? What is he paying?
They decided to keep their finances separate but now she wants access to his money when that was not what they agreed on. Am I missing something? If it's his house he is also in the right to kick her out and divorce her if he doesn't like her behavior. This doesn't seem abusive at all. She needs to be held accountable for getting into a situation where she has no leverage. If roles were reversed we would all roast the guy for being stupid enough to put himself in that situation.
Seems like he presented rational boundaries before getting married. Now she's having regret because she can't handle money.
I agree.
Sounds about right
Yes, you are missing a very big deal...they decided to keep their finances separate so why her husband is eating food she buys without putting any dime to it and telling to her that she can't handle the money. My guess is man is not having any money and this woman pays the house too. Thats why her account is empty all the time.
For all we know, the guy could be paying the rent/mortgage with his money while she has the responsibility of groceries. He probably agreed to keep finances separate since he makes so much more than her + she has a child from a previous relationship. There's simply not enough info to say that this guy is financially abusive.
This is a roommate situation he's paying all those things because it's HIS house. He's not there he basically doesn't see value on her to provide food for her.
@@neisci If they’ve decided to split finances, it’s only logical to split bills. By your logic, where should her money be going?
We need judge judy to be a guest host on this show
She won't leave because he's actually paying for 80-90%+ of the expenses, including her child from another man.
💯💯💯 Facts
Tru dat!!
Exactly!!!
Sounds like she found a dude who makes bank, and she wanted a piece of that pie for her & her baby.
She doesn't want to leave. She wants access to his money.
You didn't ask her questions and jumped to conclusions. What's household income? What are her debts? Why can't she afford gas and groceries on a full time income?
Because there are more important things then money. Clearly this isn’t a healthy marriage.
@@aleffel9668exactly. They caught something bigger in her voice, her sighs, her choice of words. It’s amazing how all this flew right by most people.
Dude is probably paying all the bills for the house, besides groceries, for her and her kid that isn't his. I dont blame him for being cautious, women brought this on themselves based on how guys are treated in court. Keep doing your thing my guy.
Exactly. Protect yourself and never trust these 304s fully and never ever marry a single mother. Recreational use only.
Hey my mortgage company is toxic and abusive because I agreed to pay for this house and signed on the dotted line but now several years into it I don’t like the terms and conditions anymore so I’m trying to renegotiate but they’re threatening to foreclose on me and put me out. What should I do? I don’t feel safe. I think it may escalate to physical abuse when the sheriff deputy comes to evict me.
Well said. This the classi bait and switch and this guy isnt falling for it.
@Zoraster Exactly. Very well described the situation what is actually going on and these two simps in the video are falling for it.
Money issues need to be discussed before marriage. He’s an abuser.He’s threatening to throw her out over money issues and other things. Making a vow does not excuse his abusive behavior.
It was discussed b4 that they will not share accounts! She literally said that in the beginning of the call
I've been watching the show for a while; the main problem that commenters have is with the inability to of the
personalities to ask the right questions before giving advice.
People want Dave because he asks the pertinent questions.
If you don't already do it, perhaps some training from Dave, or revisiting calls for trying purposes would help?
Spot on. These mellinial aged hosts don't ask the basic question ramsey would. Instead you got DeLoney asking every woman if thier safe because the husband set some boundaries in the relationship
@fauxbro1983 😂 you think this woman on the phone is in a healthy marriage right now?
@@thexorode Nope. How much of the dysfunction is She contributing? Do you know. I know I don't.
@@simonthebroken9691 "he does control everything, not just money", "he told me I haven't proven myself", "he threatened to put me out" yeah you right, looks good to me! 🤡 any other words of wisdom you wanna add, Simon?
@@thexorode You're only getting one person's side. I didn't say she was lying. How do you know what's true. Do you have a relationship with both parties?
Lol dr. Daloney...are you safe. Setting boundaries isn't physical abuse
Thank you John. You're right on. I was in a similar situation.
I think he wants to make sure he doesn’t pay a penny for a child that isn’t his. And trying to make sure she works and pays for herself and for her daughter and doesn’t depend on his money. And yes she shouldn’t depend on him for groceries or anything. She works full time! So how can she not afford these things. She shouldn’t depend on him for these things. What if she never met him and she was single?? I do agree they shouldn’t have separate bank accounts tho.
That's just weird...she shouldn't depend on him for groceries? It's not about depending on, it's about 2 people who are married or living together who both need groceries in the home.
I am a woman. I see a desperate woman. She wanted to be married so she was afraid to be honest with this man and speak out. She is not being totally fair to this man. I love my daddy Dave Ramsey but this here is not fair to her husband . Listen carefully, she said they agreed to keep finances separate before they got married ? How would any woman agree to marry a man and to do 50/50 with a man who makes four times her income ? This man has his issues but as a woman to put all the blame on this man is unfair. So how is this financial abuse? Secondly she has a daughter before she met him. Okay what conversations were held concerning this child that is not his? As for emotional abuse, I have to dig deep? Was this man doing a job that he had to be away for long periods before they got married? You see people fall in love, become sexually active without a ring , when the adrenaline falls off and reality hits , they cannot handle the truth and want to blame the other party. What conversations they did have? Did they go to see a professional licensed marriage counselor before marriage to bring all these things in the table and see if they could handle everything? . If they had gone to see a therapist, those people are trained they dig deep to and are raw. It is not late. This marriage can be revived with a lot of unlearning and relearning and professional help.
Kevin Samuels obviously had a lot more work to do with obese women like you
Initially, when she said she agreed to separate bank accounts, I thought it was because SHE didn't want joint finances, because she had a full time job. I get that. Merging finances can be a difficult adjustment to make. But then it turns out it was his idea, because he makes more money. He's not committed to her or this relationship.
Others have said we need to hear his side. Maybe. Maybe they need to go for counseling. If he doesn't go, she needs to move on. They're not saying it's easy. And I'm still not buying her reasons for her reluctance to leave the marriage.
How much gas and groceries does she buy? So much that she needs to go into debt? The guy could be at his wits end. Before the knights in shining armor jump in, they might need to know the whole situation.
Young men, listen to this call very very carefully, especially the beginning. She says they agreed before they got married not to share accounts. Then she listens to Dave Ramsey and now wants to share accounts. Those are two facts. We have right off the bat in addition to that, she has a child from someone else and she works full-time. Those are other facts. Notice how the entire conversation is framed around his actions and not those facts. This is a perfect example of how society works now if you’re the man you’re responsible for all negative outcomes. Treat women with respect and kindness, but never ever get married. Good luck.
Dead on.We also now have these two fine gentlemen in so many words telling her to go ahead and file for divorce.
I kind of completely agree when you look from the other perspectives. She chose what she wanted and now she regrets it. Now she's struggling because of her own choices of being a individual instead of a team player. The husband doesn't seem like from her perspective of course, he wants to be in this marriage. It probably started the year after they got married that he lost interest in her because of her full-time job and not being a housewife. To each their own but don't make the other seem like the bad person
100%. Very well said.
@@memphistiger4647 The Ramsey Network used to try and uplift everyone. Dave was rough but he was equally rough. The latest iterations of their talent is decidedly anti male which is unfortunate. It's baffling to me why Ramsey chose this course, men in the U.S. have very few resources to help them at a time when they under the most pressure from all sides. They had a great opportunity to reach out and address mens issues.
Good comment
Wheres Dave to ask the question, at LEAST to ask: what's your household income?
Right?! I’m bummed, I wanted to hear numbers!
It came out as they don't share finances. She is knowing only her part which was 60 000 and man is not sharing his paycheck and is not paying anything. She stays in this "marriage" because she is one of those women who are thinking marriage is must to have. She may even own the house but is afraid that man is leaving her if she is not doing what he says she needs to do.
Hi Jane, I hope you’re safe and happy away from the abusive relationship. Your baby will be raised healthier by a single mom. ❤
It’s more to this story. She stated she’s bad with money and has a full time job. I think they just convinced her she’s a victim of abuse and she initially didn’t feel that way at the start. I don’t want to be insensitive if she is being abused but there are a lot of unanswered questions about her situation imo
John is too busy playing psychic. He cares more about guessing what's going on than really hearing the truth. He'd rather validate his own ego on air than get the real details. Why does he always need to guess what's going on? He could literally ask one direct question and hear the answer instead of leading her to his conclusion on air with millions listening.
He threatens to kick her out of the house if she doesn't make the beds correctly and according to his control...did you miss that?
@@barbaramartorana1598
It's his house, if she doesn't like it, she can always leave.
He even told her she can leave.
What kind of a woman stays with a man like that? Where's her self respect?
@@terriesmith2616 What a blessing it is that you’ve never dealt with a man who will come find you or hurt you if you actually do leave. Many of us wish to be that blessed in life. I pray you keep living a life that keeps you ignorant on this subject. ❤
Sounds like a one sided marriage
I'm in a situation where I cant trust my wife with money because she has been and continues to be irresponsible with money. This does not sound like an abusive situation to me, it sounds like a husband who is tired of seeing money squandered and used irresponsably. I can relate. Sometimes enough is enough.
I think you're applying your own issues. She can't even buy groceries.
At no point is anything said that indicates she is squandering money but we do hear that he withholds money for basics like food and gas AND that he THREATENS to kick her out of the house if the beds are not made to his standards and you take his side? He threatens to kick her out for not making the beds according to his grand wishes and you do not see abuse? Financial witholding is abuse, by law, by definition, and no amount of "justifying" it makes it okay. You are right about one thing, enough is enough.
The problem is she feels like if she couldn't work then he wouldn't even help her
I know someone who has to eat rice and beans at work while the wife is buying stuff with his money. He works hard but on payday, the money is gone before he can get to it. Guys, protect your freedom especially if she’s a big spender.
I have a cousin whose husband gives her nothing from his paycheck. She pays for all the household bills and asks him to contribute if she runs out of her own money. He spends his money on toys, gambling, cigarettes. It’s crazy.
These hosts are way too in love with the sounds of their own voices and afraid of uncomfortable silences. Notice Dave will sit and wait without saying anything to get a complete answer.
I love how they just took her side so quick
It's a hard life for a simp
Husband knows her spending is outrageous, and is trying to make sure they both don’t go broke. Homeboy needs a divorce and free himself
She has zero control of her spending n wants him to give her his money
Spidy senses are telling me it’s something rooted in the kid not being his own… but hey, I’ve been wrong before!! 😅
Me and my wife live by the Hudson river with the beautiful view of midtown Manhattan, I make four to five times my wife. I pay for our enormous rent, electric, both cars and Insurances. The least my wife, who has a full time job can do... Is buy groceries and gas up her own vehicle. Of course when we go on vacations or trips, I pay for everything But It's almost a nuisance or an insult if she asks me for money for groceries or gas .... 🤔🤔
Just wow….put all of your money in one account and trust each other with it.
@@texasrodeogirl3814 Most women are so brainwashed by feminism that they believe men and women are equal. As a man you can´t trust these women. Never ever. If a man can´t find a real women and marries a feminist one, he has to protect himself or gets rect.
@@texasrodeogirl3814 if someone wastes their own money, why on earth would you give them access to yours
You sound fun
@@glitterstarbeau I try my best 😉🙂
We really needed Dave on this one
Dave acts often as a simp like these two also and blames all on the man when a women is playing the victim.
@@davecopp9356 I agree but at least Dave would've likely got to the bottom of where her money is going since she's working full time
I've had enough of these comments. If these MEN would use their brains, they wouldn't end up with these WOMEN. So there. 💁🏻♀️
“I just want a stable life for my daughter…”
Even though the husband threatens to put her out, tells her she hasn’t earned anything, etc.
Man-these women are seriously broken to think this environment is “stable” for a child. They shave so little self-worth that they can’t see how toxic this is and would endure it and keep their children in it because they are scared to be alone.
So sad and maddening.
As a man this makes me want to stay single.
these are the best shows to watch to make you appreciate your single life. Who needs this stress?
Ditto except I'm a woman I can take care of myself.
Halfway through and I'm very confused. She has her own wage so why are they not asking how much they each make/contribute? She could be an irresponsible spender with entitlement issues. I'm not normally one to agree with the crowd who think they always blame the man but this kind of seems that way.
They are just stupid, they went on her side like that was a complete story. They’re so corny
She said he makes 4x her income
@@jdtreharne Oh really? I didn't catch that at all. Well that does make it more likely she's being treated unfairly in the marriage, but they still should at least ask what they both spend on and why they don't have a joint account or if there's any reason he doesn't want to give her money.
He doesn't want to give her money because he's a control freak. If he really loved her, he would give her 50 bucks
The man probably pays for almost everything, I want to know what does she contribute to their family other than being in a another man’s child to a relationship. I think the man is the one that is being used.
You can’t help some one who doesn’t want help. This lady wants to keep her hand in the fire.
I think she is still in denial, struggling to let go. But this is a sign of her waking up, looking for encouragement.
I mean if you've ever been married, you know what you're walking into BEFORE getting married. I'm sure this didn't happen overnight. Same on his end if this is true. And we all know there's 3 sides to every story so...everyone just needs to take responsibility for their situation. Leave. Stay. Get help. Don't. But dang if you made a decision, sit in it and don't complain or do something about it. Geez! 🤷🏾♀️ who's here for taking action in 2023?!? 🤚🏾
I beg to differ. I didn’t know when I married my husband that he would always keep his heart closed and refuse to be vulnerable, to the point where his body is reacting and now he wants out of the marriage. I didn’t know that the fact we never fought was a bad sign. Don’t blame her. I’m sure she didn’t know.
@R Ann Green Great...exactly my point. Sounds like the decision was made. You're divorced..so you're no longer in the situation. Hope you learned something and can move on. 🤷🏾♀️
You clearly have no idea/experience with abusive relationships. Excellent at judging people though.
@Luna Bella I love how commenters contine to support my point and it's funny how expecting people to be responsible for their behavior and the moves they make in life is problematic. Again for the people in the back... EITHER STAY OR GO. Make a decision!
Also, I have actually been is several abusive relationships, especially as a young woman. And AGAIN I take full responsibility for attracting those people, staying too long, etc.
That was MY decision to take responsibility. If you wanna dwell in victimhood, fine. If that vindicates you to sympathize, 👍🏾. But being an angry keyboard warrior with no picture to respond about something that triggered you is not the answer. Get help, or stay and don't complain.
@RedBlackandBlue it's the lack of accountability for me! Lol! Oh well. Own your bad choices. I made one...thats why I'm divorced too. 🥰🤣
I hope this woman takes her child and runs away from this marriage as fast as she can. That was the voice of a woman who is living in fear. Nobody - nobody - should have to live that way.
Fear? Listen again when they ask WHY she is staying and hasn't left yet...it is the money and lifestyle. She married him for money and to be the simp step dad...he refused to play ball
@@TheImapotato Exactly.
Single mother saw $$$ and didn't care about the rest. It's always the man's fault....
My husband and I have totally separate accounts. I live in his house rent free and he pays for all expenses. I keep all my pay cheques and spend it as I wish, I am very happy .
He doesn't trust her with money and all of a sudden he's going to be violent with her? Wow!!
That exact thing happened to a friend of mine. After the divorce, she told us she didn't even have money for feminine hygiene products. He wouldn't give her anything. He was an evil man who looked good on the outside to all the friends
@@georgewagner7787 full time job though, the caller. And can't buy food with a full time job? Something off there.
She needs to pick herself up and leave with her daughter.
As long as she does not take responsibility for her actions she will just jump into her third bad marriage and the one who suffers most is the child.
Not buying the Birkin and the first class Mykonos vacay are considered financial and emotional abuse nowadays.
I have an income but I took on recurring bills because he is not dependable and I had to take care of my children. I am afraid I won't have enough money to live and I'm afraid to say anything to him. It's scary!
Why aren't yall talking about her about the money issue? They didn't even ask how much she makes?
Dr. Boloney: why do you stay?
Her: I haven't figured out how to take half his s*** plus support for the child that's not his. (Translation)
Bingo. She doesn't care about him just his money.
Spot on.
Yeah all we got out of this is he's a big meanie and I'm a victim of my own decisions. Any money he does not want to support Chad's spawn. Any money she has proven herself financially irresponsible in his eyes. He apparently told her upfront you handle your expenses. Now she doesn't like that so it's abusive. We know nothing here. Income? Expenses? Debts? Child support from Chad? What is his share of the load? What is her share? He's not beating her so it's not a physical problem. Is he verbal? Or is all this over "you pay for your kid and car and I'll pay everything else". Boys, don't marry women with other men's children. Find one you can sire your own kids with, and build a life together. Being a stepdad is a losing proposition, seen it personally and hear about it all the time. And women, don't marry into situations you are not comfortable with. How many times do we hear He told me blah blah and I accepted it and now I don't like it.
He didn't buy enough coffee for her.
But she has her Netflix, hair and makeup, her kid has roof and 3x meals a day but she wants that Gucci bag & to show off her wealth to her 'friends' (that she hates & hate her) on Instagram but he won't let her. He is so toxic and abusive, right?
She is in denial.
So sad.
It is funny to hear when she says MY daughter and MY child, the guy probably has no word at home, the sooner she leaves the better for the guy, she needs to start taking responsibility for her actions and the guys in general needs to stop dating single moms.
Can’t put all single mothers in the same boat
@@reese85 what boat? They're all drowning lol
@@asnmdnss nah all single ain’t bad and all women can be difficult
@@reese85 Wish we could, and push it out to sea. But you go ahead young man, go marry one lol
@@TheImapotato I can’t speak for you guys but I kno for me! I pick good women! Single mothers or not
Same situation!
She is afraid to leave
She is afraid to leave
I’ live it, not easy
“I’m 1million dollars in debt”
“Are you safe?”
Lord Father help your children to have discernment when choosing a life partner. My goodness this is a terrible situation to be in..
Amen to this prayer.
Idk! Sounds like she was making the situation sound way worse than what it actually is
God had nothing to do with this and you are too late. Pray that women choose the right guy to be Baby Daddy so they won't have to scramble to find Mr. ATM to marry. I am on this man's side...never raise another man's child
@Natalie Pope
A terrible situation for the guy. Never ever marry a single mom. Recreational use only.
@@davecopp9356 It’s a terrible situation for any two persons to find themselves in period. It doesn’t matter what side you are viewing it from.
Both parties involved made a terrible decision when they decided to get together because it’s obvious based on the few details given, that neither one came into it for love.
God made marriage very clear. Husband to love their wife like God love the church and for wives to submit to their husband as they would onto God.
If both had discernment when choosing a life partner her reasoning wouldn’t be because she wants to make sure her child is financially secure as she so bravely stated in her call.
As for the husband I am not sure what his reasons for marrying her was because he was not there to speak on the matter but it’s clear he doesn’t trust her enough to allow her to have access to other finances.. That in its self is a problem…
This has already happened so they can’t go back but others can learn from it. Hence why my original post said “let your children have discernment when choosing a life partner.”
Any two persons involve needs to have discernment. Not just the one who’s fault it may appear to be.
Have a blessed day🙏
I personally do not see what the Dr. is seeing. How is she in an unsafe place? She has a full time job and is responsible for gas and groceries. Sounds like a good deal to me. What have I missed?
The two in the video are simps and fell for the women playing the victim and answered out of emotion and feelings without logic. Dave is the same. Always blaming the man in such cases. She agreed to separate bank accounts before the marriage and what she has to pay. Now she wants to renogiate and to have more leverage is painting a picture of unsafety and him as a bad guy. The guy is a saint for taking in a single mother.
*SIMPS THAT THEY ARE IS THE REASON WHY*
This advice seems extreme. It is a finance situation, and they made it about abuse.
Oh wow, this woman must be married to my ex-bf. He was exactly the same way.
Every woman should know about finance and have a way to make money no matter what as a safety net in case the husband turns abusive after marriage, which happens often.
This poor girl thinks that she needs to sacrifice herself on the alter of his displeasure in order to fulfill her vows! What a sad powerless place she puts herself in. 😢
This dude just feeds into the histrionics and drama.
Anytime a man doesn’t want to share finances….”are you safe?”
Why get married if you don't want to share finances? Legally everything is shared anyway
Tale as old as time !!!!! So sad
She ain't going nowhere.
I believe each person should have their own accounts. And a joint account to pay common bills ... mortgage or rent, utilities, groceries ... to which account each puts in a proportionate amount. In this case, he contributes 4x what she does as he makes 4x her salary.
In the words of Kevin Samuels, there is no honor in being a step-father. George and Delony really disappointed in this call, especially George cause it's expected from Delony, but for George to simp that hard, not cool.
If you have a car that makes that noise when you enter or exit it, you shouldn’t be in debt. You have too nice of a car to be in debt.
The guys are putting thoughts in here head. There is no way they can make those conclusions they did in 60 seconds.