at this point it wouldnt even suprise me if she fucked with her parents too. does she know anyone she didnt fuck with? i would just break up. she is promiscuous as hell and i dont need that shit. bye.have fun fucking every person you meet.
Ya this isn't about "staking a claim" like OP got told, it's about the fact he's been repeatedly cheated on, and his current partner seems to have slept with everyone she's close with. Those are the 'raw facts' and it makes total sense that OP is nervous about his current partner doing what he's had done to him multiple times. The saying is "Once bitten, twice shy." When you've gone through a bad experience, you'll be more hesitant to have it repeated. And OP was cheated on at least 2 times, so he's 4+ times as cautious about cheating.
Maybe I'm super jaded, but I feel in 4 years, we'll get the update... So, I just found out my fiancee has been cheating on me with a married childhood friend, and it all started when they went camping and I never saw it coming.
@@jaegerthedane3245 it's not hard. My best friend is a guy, and we have 0 sexual feelings; it's the fact that they already had sex aka their relationship has/had sexual feelings; it's her and his way of acting that also seems off and how they're wayyyy to eager to talk about how they won't ever do anything again over and over and over when no one is even asking them anymore.
Look, maybe im just judgmental but i think its odd how his gf has hooked up with most of her friends. I dont think OP is having jealousy issues, id be insecure too if my boyfriend had hooked up with all his best friends lol. Sleeping around while you are young? Fine whatever, but having slept with a majority of your friends? Idk i find it odd.
I was thinking that. I could understand the first one as "okay, maybe they tried it out, realised it didn't work romantically and stayed friends" but the rest got a bit of an eyebrow raise. But then again, it could be nothing.
@@dillongage he is just brainwashed into thinking a gut-feelings are "just" insecurities. because of so-called insecurities the main parachute dont open we jump with a reserve parachute as a backup out of airplanes. if a situation seems fishy something is fishy. and to me the whole gf is fishy. i mean she slept basically with all of her friends. yeah, nah. enjoy your life. but im going the other direction, i dont date sluts.
@@757Bricksquad Edit: Sorry for the novel, got a little worked up on this one. Think its been simmering for awhile now and you drew the short straw ^^U Possibly yeah, but reddit is not the beginning and end of humanity. Statistically speaking we have genuinely no reason to believe she cheated. And those are me using provably false, deliberately overly pessimistic stats as well. There's absolutely a chance she's cheated and everyone being nice and nothing suspicious happening was an act. But its equally possible that you're being Truman showed and an entire TV audience is watching you read this comment. Eventually we gotta learn that not being able to prove something didn't happen doesn't mean something did. How many stories have we had about someone innocent being accused of cheating and everyone turning on them because they couldn't prove something not happening? Over 100 on this channel alone? Maybe approaching millions if you go with all of reddit, even if you discount the fakes. I'm so sick of this 'sus equals guilty' mentality. Imagine OP actually dumped her because of the replies and she was innocent the entire time. Do you genuinely have no friends you're that close with purely because of the shit between their legs? I do, and I'm pan, and literally nothing has ever compelled me to cheat (could be the depression but could also be the depression telling me that as an insult ^^U)
Story 1- I had a conversation with my spouse years ago when he had a “ friendship” with a girl. I did trust my hubby but the more time they spent together hanging out the more nervous I became because life does happen… so not wanting to tell an adult man what to do…. I sat him down and said “ you are putting yourself in an bad situation hanging out alone so much and if one day you tell me that something happened between you two you will not be able to say “ it just happened.” I’m not going to stop you from hanging out but I won’t forgive you if something happens because “ you were warned. 30 years later here we are. :) ( happy face)
Can use the same lines with male friends with women but 99% of women just say your insecure, total Hippocrates. I don't even date or take seriously any women with male friends they firmly go into the recreational use only. Never negotiate with terrorists, if a women entertains any other men weather it's a camping trip alone or going to a club with the girls she is 100% not relationship material and everything men are taught to avoid. The sad thing is when women get ghosted or not taking seriously the man rarely explains why and women just insert nonsense excuse, in reality men are very simple, if a man does not take you seriously it is mostly one of three things, ether your a known 304, you entertaining other men and still acting single in some way or your masculine energy is too much. This is 100% the reason why the vast majority of women are not taken seriously by the men they want. If your not a hoe, bring peace, feminine and put your man before ALL other men you will be a 1% woman. Women have the friend zone men have the recreational use only zone.
Story 1 is what happens when couples talk about their insecurities and work as a team to confront them. Such a great change of pace from the usual reddit relationship drama.
Story 1. Does girlfriend have friends that she hasn't slept with. There was going to be issues for op when the girlfriend having onebon one time with a past fling. Glad girlfriend heard op out and comprises were made. That allowed him to get those issue solved and maybe helped her to. Thanks to reddit cheating is common because gaslighted victims need a third party help.
"I don't want to hold her back from something that isn't even wrong" OP, yes it is wrong. Couples in a relationship don't do this out of respect for the other person. Have some self respect.
Story 2: How the actual fuck did that guy even make it that far in life to get a job let alone not know the fucking difference between toilet paper and paper towels?
my thought is that there is something else wrong with him, brain capacity wise, that's why mom brought him, and manager didn't notice it and just call him Kevin...
Story1: So would the g/f be ok if OP went on a week-long single-tent camping trip with one of his old flames? In spite of the initial brush-off, I'm glad the g/f took OP's feelings seriously, and they were able to work out a compromise.
No - absolutely she would not have been ok with it. It's interesting how so many people on the thread regard that as 'insecurity' - I don't think any wise person, man or woman, would be okay with this situation.
@@jackspring7709 dude yes! all the people saying that it’s OK for the girlfriend to do that not only on the thread itself but it on here too is baffling. Lol it sounds like a lot of them haven’t had relationships.
that's true. but also, he wouldn't "let" her go with any of the other people either. he was uncomfortable with her going with any of said friends to the point of almost not "allowing her" to go. That's insanely controlling. Even after seeing how they interact and being relieved and all trusty, he immidiately ot suspicious of her for... what, not being visible to him the second he wakes up? like, how dare she not put her life on pause until he wakes up and wait for him to allow her stuff - she must be up to no good. He still regards to her doing regular stuff and having friends as "him letting her" in the update and still talks about her friendships as inherently bad thing and just an opportunity for her to cheat that he must prevent and still gives the "my GF is basically a cheater for having friends and i'm the good one for allowing this" vibe., so i dont think they solved the problem, just survived this particular instance of this symptom. he thinks he's the "good guy" in this situation and he "doesnt even see it as betrayal at all", per his words \\like wtf dude? WHAT DID SHE DO that makes you such a good person for not feeling betrayed? and if she did why would you be the good one for not caring?\\.he's still jealous, controlling and still thinks he has the authority to ALLOW her things.she seems very eager to immidiately please him, even at her expense, which is not a good combo AT ALL. i really really hope - for her sake - that this relationship doesnt last. Even if he gets therapy, it can only do so much. the combination of extremely jealous, controlling person that is also incredibly entitled and thinks has the authority over partner and a people pleaser that is ready to make him happy at her disadvantage and her other relationships is inherently dangerous and not good for anyone and if they were able to handle it all this wouldn't have happened in the first place. i see my opinion on this one is different from majority, but still, my two cents.
@@cheeriomartinez True - I found the naivety baffling, but I guess a lot of the commenters probably are either too young to have had much life experience or, as you point not, just not had relationships.
Well it is weird that he was willing to go camping with the other guy anyway if that guy used to sleep with his girlfriend. Not sure it’s any weirder than her going alone…..
Story 1 is it not a bit of an issue that she basically has been with all of her friends kind of a red flag to me. Sure they communicated there issues well here but the fact remains she has too many sexual partners in her life.
For the second story: Either he's insanely stupid or, more than likely, I believe it's weaponized incompetence. He's TRYING to get fired, so that he can say to his mommy "I tried, but they just don't like me" or "I'm just not good enough, I guess", so that he can get out of working a job. He doesn't actually want to work, but his mom probably made him get a job, so he decided to deliberately screw up as many things as he could, in order to get fired.
@@alphawolfn5874 small diner or cafe from the sounds of it so the interview was likely "here are the hours this is how everything works see you tomorrow" speaking from experience
Story 1: I don't blame them, A Walk To Remember is a real tear jerker. Story 2: ... is Kevin okay? Seriously, eating glass is begging for internal bleeding.
Story 1: "Just don't care what other people think" the sentiment is great but what he cares about are the opinions of not only her, but also their friends and her family. You kind of _want_ those people to like you in order for the relationship to do well since they'd have the most influence (within reason of course. If they don't like you for purely selfish reasons then that's when it doesn't matter)
American here: Why is Clotted cream okay, but not whipped cream? Both are just cream. Is there a flavor difference or texture? And I thought you serve jam & cream on the plate and they add it to the scones, you are supposed to make a scone sandwich?
@@sacredruintherapeuticmassa6795 Canadian here (although living with a Brit) so take what I say with a grain of salt. Clotted cream is thicker than whipped cream and has a stronger taste, and you don't make a scone sandwich, you slice the scone in 2 and than put a little cream and a little jam (or jam than cream, it's a bit contentious lol) on both halves and eat the halves like 2 separate things. Hope this makes sense 😄
@@nathryl03 I'm from California and have had clotted cream before - yes, your assessment as to the differences sounds about right. Technically the way you described putting the cream and jam on it does result in sandwiches - _open face_ sandwiches. 😏😁
S1 (Obligatory not done with it yet): My first thought was, "I don't have problems with my husband having female friends, and hanging out, but even though I 100% trust him, I think even I'd be a little uncomfortable with just the two of them camping." And THEN I got to the part, "They liked each other for a bit throughout the years, and they had sex one summer, but it never went anywhere..." AND they'll be sharing a tent? Nope. Feelings *and sex* were involved, as well as their relationship kind of being unresolved. This could lead to trouble. Her shrugging off your worries is a red flag to me honestly. If I were in her shoes, I wouldn't want to go without my partner (especially after he's voiced his concerns), and most of my friends are guys. Holy cow, how many of her friends has she slept with? Aww, I'm glad y'all came up with a compromise that worked for the both of you, and that all four of you seem to get along so great! Truly heartwarming. S2: WTAF he ate the glass?! On purpose??! I'm worried about humanity...
as i was listening to story 2 i kept asking myself "HOW can someone be THAT stupid?" i had to pause and tell my step mom about this story and the look she gave when i got to the broken jam jar was the exact expression i had. we both work retail. I'm mentally disabled and even I knew what to do. the only issue was to figure out what key went for the tp holders.
I believe it's weaponized incompetence. He's TRYING to get fired, so that he can say to his mommy "I tried, but they just don't like me" or "I'm just not good enough, I guess", so that he can get out of working a job.
@@kitarrah1422 Either that, or he’s the kind of person I call “lethally stupid”. The kind of person so absolutely fucking moronic, completely lacking in any sort of brain function that they’re inevitably going to end up killing either themselves or someone else with their sheer idiocy.
Love how they handled the conflict in the first story, so rare for these stories to have such a happy ending with people actually communicating, and being mature and respectful.
@@QueenOfTheZombieApocalypse Oh and you think she would tell him if she did cheat the guy is right he should have boundaries and stick with them. He is not wrong.
@@QueenOfTheZombieApocalypse No not mad but 99.9% of the time this would end badly and i still would not allow this in a relationship your basically asking for trouble and true like one guy said if they want to cheat they will but how would you find out maybe years later after getting married. Which isn't a lot of good.
I am in a friendship with a girl I was best friends with since we were teenagers. We did hook up two or three times but realized we had made a huge mistake, we were meant to be friends. We have only been friends ever since that brief moment. That all being true, there's no way I would take her out overnight or on vacation (which a 5 day hike qualifies I would think). That's a VERY big ask for OPs gf to bring up. I'm glad they worked it out and OP feels all went well. I don't think it qualifies as a red flag but maybe a yellow one. I'd be bothered if someone asked something like that of me even with assurances
I absolutely agree - and it amazes me how so many people see this as OP's "insecurity" - even poor OP himself is calling it an insecurity. No wise person, man or woman, would be comfortable with that situation.
@@jackspring7709 insane to me. “No op you’re being insecure and controlling for not wanting your girlfriend to go out alone with an old flame” lmao ok let your SO go hang out alone with their ex then
Story 1: I don't think what he said was "fucked up" at all. I consider it more of a respecting your partners boundaries issue, than thinking his partner is going to cheat. I fully trust my partner to not cheat on me, but I would be lieing if I said my partner staying alone for a week with someone he use to be sexually involved with didn't bother me. And I'm pretty sure my partner would feel the same way. It's great they both were able to work things out, but it is not a bad thing to set boundaries.
Haven't gotten to the ending just yet but decided to drop my two cents: A cheater is a cheater is a cheater. If she's gonna cheat then she will, no camping trip is going to decide that, she will decide that, either on this trip or any time in the future. If someone cheats it is because THEY chose to cheat.
I have a Kevin story. One of my brother's friends legit believed he "looked Hispanic because his dad ate a lot of Mexican food before he was born." He was 24 when he said this and for context he's Greek Roman though could have some Latin origins just not from Taco Bell.
No hon. It's super duper sketchy to go off to a two man tent with an ex. Even sketchier that it's a goodbye trip. They might decide to rip one off for old times sake or get in their feels because they may never see each other again or whatever overdramatic bullshyt makes people make bad decisions and cheat. And the person that was all you just have to trust and if something happens it happens if it doesn't it doesn't. But she could cheat and OP never know til they're getting divorced in 12 yrs and during the custody battle she says you can't have our little son Jimmy he's not even yours! .... So nah. Wait. "She only has sex with men she's emotionally close to" ... "said she was even closer to ex than I originally thought so that relieved my anxiety some" - well which is it? Nevermind I don't care if she cheats. None of this story makes sense by the time you get to the end.
Story one. Don’t think your insecure. The thing about relationships is that you set boundaries and expect your s/o to follow them, and they set boundaries and you end u following theirs as well. I would be very uncomfortable with my girl going out with any sexual partners alone In general. I trust her but you never know the other person’s intentions .I love how the compromises went along in this story tho.
I have to say, the girlfriend reacted the same way I do when OP talked to her about how he was feeling. She wanted to reassure him, go with any options he gave to help him feel more secure and offered to call it off to try baby steps instead. Honest, genuine people will work WITH the person who is concerned/scared/feeling bad, not against them, and more importantly will work at that person's pace, not their own. I'm so glad they found a working solution that suited everyone and it turned out so great. Cheers to adult communication and compromise!
I've been in OP's position, but unlike in this situation... my bf back then dismissed my feelings, went with this other girl on a trip anyway and guess what... things happened. I suppose it comes down to what you're willing to do for someone you love, or unwilling to do for someone you don't love, or don't love enough. I had a very difficult time dealing with partners going to places without me after that. Took therapy to get through it. I love how there actually ARE people in the world willing to listen to a person's fear stemming from past trauma.
I like how Mark gets right to the heart of the issue - how the scones are served. (Most Americans don't recognize a scone on sight, and doesn't know or care how they're served.)
That last comment on the first story completely missed the mark. For them to say that Asking the GF not to go is controlling means they've conflated the meaning of asking as opposed to demanding or telling someone not.to do something. They're not the same thing at all. Asking is not controlling, say it with me!
Nahhh brother they're trying to hard to make you believe ,That she ain't gonna cheat on you ..... Mark my words she will cheat on you and you won't know it.....
S1: I find it hysterical how so many people in the comments are saying how great that ended...lol That's nonsense. Just because the guy was cool (had beers and did drugs together!), there wasn't going to be anything inappropriate. Dead.
Mark, many places in the US, it's difficult to find clotted cream. Whipped cream is one substitute. Mascarpone is a better one, although it has a bit of a tang to it. My wife makes scones frequently. We usually put butter and jam on them because we rarely have anything else in the house.
I've tried to make clotted cream...I don't think that I was very successful though. As to which comes first, if you have clotted cream I think it goes first then jam. But if you have whipped cream, then jam first.
@@straightblackgirl It DOES exist here, but is hard to find. When I can find it, it's phenomenally expensive. Where I used to live, there was a tea room that imported it and sold it in their store. Prices were what you'd expect from a tea room.
@@bun04y You really need to use unpasteurized, un-homogenized milk for good results. You also have to avoid boiling the milk. Unfortunately, raw milk is not legal to sell for human consumption in many places. If you can find pasteurized milk that isn't homogenized, it might be worth a try, but I think the pasteurization breaks down the structure too much. Also, the bacteria that pasteurizing removes are helpful in the clotting process. You might try culturing it, but I have no idea what to use, and it might make it tangy. Maybe lactobacillus bulgaricus.
Let me go ask my wife if I can go camping alone in the woods for a week with my ex-GF because we’re BFF’s now. Men need to establish stipulations and boundaries before giving their commitment. A real partner will avoid even the appearance of impropriety.
So OP’s girlfriend fricked literally all of her friends mentioned both male and female. And he’s looking to turn that into a wife??? I’ll be on standby waiting for the inevitable “she ran off with her female friend and we’re now getting a divorce.” I literally know someone this happened to, for the same reason. Wife decided it was time to switch teams again and hit it with the girls. She ran off on her husband and kids and was never seen again. The kids were young too :(
Story 1: Why are some people so incapable of setting boundaries? It's not only ok to do that in a relationship, it's outright necessary. Like, this isn't about insecurities at all, it's simply extremely inappropriate to even just ask this in a relationship... And yes, it goes both ways, it would be way over the line for a guy to do this too. . OP sounds extremely naive to a point of idiocy. She isn't attracted to guys unless she has an emotional connection with them, so OP is cool with it? Ok... Does OP realise that Kyle is her best friend, lol? Just the fact she seemingly slept with all her friends is a red flag. I'm 99,9% sure that she'll cheat on OP, if not now then later.
Low value men with no backbone. My girlfriend would have told me she wanted to take a trip with a dude I would tell her to make it a one way, cause he can keep her.
BF is now newest friend. Add one more name to friends she's slept with🤦♂️ Is this story even real. I don't recognize that reality/ world. Sorry to say.
Some people are fine with that kind of thing and some aren’t. I don’t think it’s a reflection of one’s insecurity or lack thereof just because they have a boundary. It depends on how the situation is handled. To each their own.
Yeah I completely agree with you! The way it worked out for them is not the norm at all. I wouldn't be comfortable spending the night alone with a guy who isn't my husband. I'm not even comfortable being alone with any man who isn't my husband besides our relatives of course. And I definitely wouldn't feel comfortable with my husband spending the night with some girl he used to be in a relationship with or he banged. And I feel like that's a pretty normal boundary and isn't indicative of deep-seated insecurity or self-esteem issues. I also personally think it's really disrespectful to your spouse to put yourself in that kind of position where something might possibly happen or rumors might get started. It just isn't smart to deliberately put yourself in those kinds of situations especially since they are causally doing d *ugs like OP and everyone else in the story were. That's just asking for trouble and for you to make a bad decision that hurts a lot of people and ruin your life while impaired.
Exactly! OP repeatedly said "let her go". Ah, no! She doesn't need his permission. But if he acknowledged that he preferred she not go from the very beginning, this issue would have been resolved in less than an hour, instead of OP fretting about it for days/weeks.
OP was lucky. He took the chance, communicated, moved forward, assessed and re-assessed, didn't let his insecurities hold him or his SO back. In the end, things went fantastic. He grew. His and his SOs relationships grew and solidified. It sounds like the 4 people have gained a wonderful, solid foundation, for the beginning of wonderful adulthoods. Personally and workwise. I hope OP does well in his new position and is a great boss.
@jakeand9020 just cuz you would cheat doesn't mean everyone does. Personally I've went through a I just need a fuck buddy and it's easier with friends then with strangers for a long term situation. But I'm still friends with some of them and we have boundaries to make our SOs comfortable.
Story1) I don't know how I feel about this one. Who keeps all their sexual exploits as friends??? I'm glad they worked it out but I dunno if this relationship will work out in the long run as it seems GF's past and the fact she keeps all her exes as friends makes OP pretty uncomfortable. I dunno, maybe it will work out! But I'd certainly always be slightly nervous around her friends (except Kyle and Anna at this point) if I was in OP's shoes. Glad they talked and worked it out atleast! Story2) Jesus Christ Kevin!!!
I'll never understand being friends with people you had sex with when in a relationship. Like yea I had sex with a vast majority of people in my friend group no biggie
I don't think story 1 is sweet at all. 1. OP sounds very naive and is too hard on himself. He has every right to feel some type of way about his girlfriend going on a trip alone with her ex. 2. OP said that his girlfriend only is attracted to men she has an emotional connection with so he's not worried. But then goes on to say that she has a close relationship with this guy and has already slept with him in the past. Which indicates she was attracted to him. It doesn't help she has slept with her whole friendgroup. It's no wonder OP has been cheated on in the past. No it's not his fault but selfish AHs always look for partnerts they can manipulate. Anytime he has reservations she can just tell him he's posessive.
I'm not insecure but I could never date a women who has been with her whole friend group the fact that every name that was mentioned she has slept with them is major red flag.
If your woman asks you to go camping with another dude just dump her immediately. Don't bother asking details of the camping trip, just dump her. She's definitely not worth anymore of your time. Why does OP have a problem telling her it is totally inappropriate. Why are men so weak. Dump her at once. He's a weak pathetic sap afraid to put his own authority on his own relationship
The first story reminds me of a situation a few decades ago ... I was into this woman and she actually was into me but at this point, all that happened were a few long coffee dates with deep conversations. In one of these conversations she told me that a partner of hers needs be comfortable and trust her if she and her best friend (a guy) were to stay overnight in a hotel even if they had to sleep in the same bed. I internally gulped a bit but asked her if she would be if I (in case I was this partner of hers) would be in the same situation with my best friend (which happened to be a woman). She seemed a bit shaken but assured me that it would 'obviously' be ok. So we got into a relationship and a year or so later I went to the movies with this female friend of mine. Next day my partner asked about how I spent the previous day and I told her she did not like it and was not shy about expressing her jealousy. So I calmly thinking of the conversation above asked "So sleeping in one bed would have been ok but watching a movie is ... too intimate?! " She had to give me this one ;-)
1. After a close guy friend of mines GF went out of state with another male friend of ours for a trip and they ended up sleeping together, I can completely understand OP's concern. But, I'm glad it all worked out in the end.
Story 1: Sometimes good communication is key that can benefit a healthy relationship, I wish nothing but the best for OP, his partner, her friend and his now fiancee. I love when these relationship stories have a happy ending to them. Story 2: Jeez, reading these Kevin stories, it's hard to believe some of these people are that dumb, what possesses a person to feed a customer broken glass?!
@@diarradunlap9337 Thing is, he ate the broken glass himself I dont think he would put his own actual life on the line due to just malicious intent, him eating it himself seems like he truly thinks its not a big deal. Stupid, yes. But evil? I get the vibe hes just mindnumbingly stupid
The only response should be 'sure, you can also be single too.' If any girlfriend wants to go on a week long vacation alone with an ex (be it relationship or fling) then something is up. It's so shitty how men have been groomed into thinking 'I don't like that you'll be alone with someone you've hooked up with for a week' is somehow controlling. It is NOT controlling. Would she be called controlling it it were the other way around? I HIGHLY doubt it.
Story 1. She's definitely gonna cheat on you. It doesn't surprise me that every single gf he's had up to that point has cheated on him. He's weak-willed, unwilling to have a single boundary, and because the dude's being all nice and buddy buddy to him he folded? Give me a break. This sounds like the exact prelude to so many infidelity stories. "Bbbut I trusted them waaah. He seemed like such a good guy, he loved his gf he would never cheat" Maybe the fact that every single gf before this one cheated on him should have clued him in to the fact that he's not a good judge of character.
Story 1: I'm glad this worked out how it did. OP's initial hesitancy isn't insecurity. That's a shady situation when you don't really know the other person involved. It's one thing to trust your partner. It's another to trust some other person you've never met.
Story 2: JFC! This guy is actually a danger to himself & others, he literally fed customers & himself broken glass! All the other stuff is idiotic & annoying but can be dealt with, but the glass incident is beyond someone being stupid & actually dangerous. Him asking if he should go to the hospital straight after makes me think it's not just extreme ignorance though because to ask that he clearly knew it actually was a dangerous thing to do.
I don't have to even hear the story because if you're girlfriend cared about you and had respect for you she wouldn't even be thinking about going at all... Sweet Baby Tiny Jesus is there any friends that she has man or woman that she hasn't slept with?! LOL Omgosh, NOT KEVIN!! 🤣These have me cracking up all the time.. I got one.. Hey, where's the Daytona 500... WE LIVE IN FUCKING FLORIDA!! I said Kentucky 🤣 Oh, here's another one... He said, how did Obama train seals to take out Bin Laden? Wouldn't they see the seals coming out the water? How do they walk on the land..? That's when I got it 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I could never be with a girl who’s slept with most of her friends. That’s too much for me, I don’t even keep contact with my exes or hookups especially if I’m in a relationship. Imagine ur gf hosting a party and half the room probably seen ur gf naked
Story 1. If both partners couldn't go the trip should be canceled. His concerns are justified considering they have a sexual history. If she can't respect that let her be single.
Kevin defo had a convo with his mum on the way to work. Kevin: But muuuuuum why do I have to go to work? Mum: Just see how it goes for a day, hon. Kevin: (*flashes back to the one time his mum asked him to the dishes and he did the greasy things first) Ok mum~ mwhahaha
Uh, no, you don't have a girlfriend who goes on a week-long camping trip with an old flame...or any other man. The heck with that. What kind of boundaries do you have in your relationship?
Story 1, I know it all turned out all right in the end, with these particular people. but I don't know if I would have been ok with it. IMO, it was planned as a couples trip. One can't go? Ok, if the other one still wants to go and is ok being a third wheel, fine, I can see the trip still happening. But if one member of each couple can't go, and the remaining two are close/formerly hooked up? Ehh, it's not a couple's trip anymore and needs to be rescheduled. But maybe I'm just jaded from my own experiences.
I don't understand why people get into relationships and than do things that will ruins the trust and is obviously bad situations. Like going on week long vacations.🙄
Just from the title, I gotta say, going camping ALONE with an ex is a slap in the face. Even if she doesn't want to cheat, I'm assuming 1 wk vacation time is a big piece of her yearly allotment, and she's choosing to use that time with her ex instead if her partner. Nope.
Am I the only one that thinks that the fact that she has slept with all her close friends is Big Red Flag? It's just so uncomfortable to me. Of course one would have trouble in that situation. I may not be an expert, but normally one doesn't sleep with their friends, much less with multiple friends.
i was going to say the same thing EDIT: The fact that she was willing to compromise or even cancel was a good sign. However who has she not been with based on the story?
Story one: glad it seems to have worked out. My Reddit indoctrinated brain is still suspicious. But hey, not my circus, not my monkeys. I wanted to touch on something else that stood out to me in this story and a few others I've listened to the last couple of days: When did having and expressing your personal boundaries to your partner become 'controlling'? I know I'm old school in my 40s, but what the heck? People (younger people? 'woker' people?) seem to have forgotten all relationships are give and take. Some things you do or don't do out of respect for your partner and their boundaries. Don't cheat is a pretty easy one. Do respect your partners dietary choices (omnivore, vegetarian, vegan) is another one. And scale up from there.
The last comment before the update clearly miss the part were OP said they were sexual partners before. What person would ever be comfortable with their partner spending a long time alone with an ex-fling.
IKR? A "platonic" emotional connection? OP specifically said they'd slept together years earlier and had sort of made an attempt at a relationship (even if they never actually officially got together).
Lots of people, it is pretty normal in my extended friend group. It is also OK that people aren't ok with it. But if that is the case you probably shouldn't date someone who has had some fwb situations.
It might have worked out in this story.....but I still think it's concerning that a partner has to be told how this makes OP feel and brushed off his feelings. Relationships are about respect.....but considering they both check out other people, the respect isn't there as it should be anyways.
My partner and I have the utmost respect for each other, but that doesn't mean we are dead. We watch when gorgeous women walk by and point them out to each other. I have been known to pause a movie at a sexy scene, and wait until she gets back so she can enjoy it too. If it clears up any confusion, we are both female. Looking at a good looking person isn't disrespect if you aren't looking to cheat, and if the couple is ok with it on both sides. It is normal to look at and admire a nice looking person. It is only disrespectful if you do it in front of your partner when you know he/she doesn't like it. All couples are different. What works for you may not work for me, and vice versa. :)
Ah, scones, reminds me of our Scotland trip and first stop in a town, south of a huge lake. Cream, jam, without anything. Perfect to tea. Reminded me of crumbly pastry dough from home. Didn't get homesick but now I think I'm having Fernweh.
An old flame (more like amicable ex) that op does not even know - for a week alone camping? That is not insecurity, but is concerning af. I wouldn't be fine with that either. Edit: that's a great update! 🤩
They need to sit down and talk. He needs to tell her his feelings without down playing them. If she brushes him off, she sucks. If she listens and tells her feelings. She’s a keeper. You can’t help your insecurities and feelings. But having a healthy relationship means communicating and finding compromise.
Story 2: In their defence, I don’t think clotted cream is easy to get outside the UK. In Australia, there’s thickened cream, and dollop cream (where the Bulla brand actually shows on a scone on the container) Okay so I looked it up and there is clotted cream but there really is just one brand and it’s pricey. I’ll need to try it on scones. It is made in Australia though (Tasmania)
Story 1. I may be alone in thinking this but why would you go in a relationship with someone who have sexual relations with alsmost all her friends? In my opinion no matter how much trust you have with each other theres must be a certain boundary.
Story 1: So, everyone in the gf’s life is someone she’s slept with…yeah, OP being nervous over this trip makes more and more sense.
If he had a spine he would have just dumped her as soon as she suggested camping with another dude
He doesn't have a spine and he deserves what's coming to him.
at this point it wouldnt even suprise me if she fucked with her parents too. does she know anyone she didnt fuck with? i would just break up. she is promiscuous as hell and i dont need that shit. bye.have fun fucking every person you meet.
Ya this isn't about "staking a claim" like OP got told, it's about the fact he's been repeatedly cheated on, and his current partner seems to have slept with everyone she's close with. Those are the 'raw facts' and it makes total sense that OP is nervous about his current partner doing what he's had done to him multiple times.
The saying is "Once bitten, twice shy." When you've gone through a bad experience, you'll be more hesitant to have it repeated. And OP was cheated on at least 2 times, so he's 4+ times as cautious about cheating.
I find it disturbing that every person she suggests is someone she slept with to ease his mind.
Red flag in itself.
Maybe I'm super jaded, but I feel in 4 years, we'll get the update... So, I just found out my fiancee has been cheating on me with a married childhood friend, and it all started when they went camping and I never saw it coming.
You're not jaded you just have common sense.
@@eloniom5768 Why is it so hard to believe that people of the opposite sex can be best friends with each other and not have sexual feelings?
They can't, once you cross the boundary of dating you can't undo the harm it's done to being friends.
@@jaegerthedane3245 it's not hard. My best friend is a guy, and we have 0 sexual feelings; it's the fact that they already had sex aka their relationship has/had sexual feelings; it's her and his way of acting that also seems off and how they're wayyyy to eager to talk about how they won't ever do anything again over and over and over when no one is even asking them anymore.
This guy is a super simp
Look, maybe im just judgmental but i think its odd how his gf has hooked up with most of her friends. I dont think OP is having jealousy issues, id be insecure too if my boyfriend had hooked up with all his best friends lol. Sleeping around while you are young? Fine whatever, but having slept with a majority of your friends? Idk i find it odd.
I was thinking that. I could understand the first one as "okay, maybe they tried it out, realised it didn't work romantically and stayed friends" but the rest got a bit of an eyebrow raise. But then again, it could be nothing.
Yeah, been there, done that. I'm sure they didn't "cheat," they also definitely had sex.
OP is 100% going to get cheated on eventually.
@@dillongage he is just brainwashed into thinking a gut-feelings are "just" insecurities. because of so-called insecurities the main parachute dont open we jump with a reserve parachute as a backup out of airplanes. if a situation seems fishy something is fishy. and to me the whole gf is fishy. i mean she slept basically with all of her friends. yeah, nah. enjoy your life. but im going the other direction, i dont date sluts.
Yeah, that many bodies is a troubling sign for a man or a woman.
Reddit stories have jaded me. I can't shake the feeling that OP was just finessed by his gf and Kyle.
Yeah, been there, done that. I'm sure they didn't "cheat," they also definitely had sex.
Yea OP will be back here in 5 years posting “my wife of 5 years has been cheating since before we got married”
@@757Bricksquad
Edit: Sorry for the novel, got a little worked up on this one. Think its been simmering for awhile now and you drew the short straw ^^U
Possibly yeah, but reddit is not the beginning and end of humanity. Statistically speaking we have genuinely no reason to believe she cheated. And those are me using provably false, deliberately overly pessimistic stats as well. There's absolutely a chance she's cheated and everyone being nice and nothing suspicious happening was an act. But its equally possible that you're being Truman showed and an entire TV audience is watching you read this comment. Eventually we gotta learn that not being able to prove something didn't happen doesn't mean something did. How many stories have we had about someone innocent being accused of cheating and everyone turning on them because they couldn't prove something not happening? Over 100 on this channel alone? Maybe approaching millions if you go with all of reddit, even if you discount the fakes. I'm so sick of this 'sus equals guilty' mentality. Imagine OP actually dumped her because of the replies and she was innocent the entire time. Do you genuinely have no friends you're that close with purely because of the shit between their legs? I do, and I'm pan, and literally nothing has ever compelled me to cheat (could be the depression but could also be the depression telling me that as an insult ^^U)
I couldn't be with a girl who slept with her whole friend group and continues to be close with them. I just don't see that going well
Weird af isn't it
Story 1- I had a conversation with my spouse years ago when he had a “ friendship” with a girl. I did trust my hubby but the more time they spent together hanging out the more nervous I became because life does happen… so not wanting to tell an adult man what to do…. I sat him down and said “ you are putting yourself in an bad situation hanging out alone so much and if one day you tell me that something happened between you two you will not be able to say “ it just happened.” I’m not going to stop you from hanging out but I won’t forgive you if something happens because “ you were warned. 30 years later here we are. :) ( happy face)
That's actually a really good strategy!
Can use the same lines with male friends with women but 99% of women just say your insecure, total Hippocrates. I don't even date or take seriously any women with male friends they firmly go into the recreational use only.
Never negotiate with terrorists, if a women entertains any other men weather it's a camping trip alone or going to a club with the girls she is 100% not relationship material and everything men are taught to avoid.
The sad thing is when women get ghosted or not taking seriously the man rarely explains why and women just insert nonsense excuse, in reality men are very simple, if a man does not take you seriously it is mostly one of three things, ether your a known 304, you entertaining other men and still acting single in some way or your masculine energy is too much. This is 100% the reason why the vast majority of women are not taken seriously by the men they want.
If your not a hoe, bring peace, feminine and put your man before ALL other men you will be a 1% woman.
Women have the friend zone men have the recreational use only zone.
Story 1 is what happens when couples talk about their insecurities and work as a team to confront them. Such a great change of pace from the usual reddit relationship drama.
Agreed
Why is it this girl has fu@ked everyone of her friends? That is a red flag all by itself.
Story 1. Does girlfriend have friends that she hasn't slept with. There was going to be issues for op when the girlfriend having onebon one time with a past fling. Glad girlfriend heard op out and comprises were made. That allowed him to get those issue solved and maybe helped her to.
Thanks to reddit cheating is common because gaslighted victims need a third party help.
quite honestly to me it sounded like the gf slept with every person she knows and is close with
Also "She isn't instantly attracted to guys so seeing how close they are calms me down" I'm sorry what based on everything you've said so far what?
@@Cemtexify yep, that relationship will get an ending that everyone but him saw coming
"I don't want to hold her back from something that isn't even wrong" OP, yes it is wrong. Couples in a relationship don't do this out of respect for the other person. Have some self respect.
Exactly.
I was thinking the same thing, with all the comments I started to doubt myself until i saw this comment .
Story 2: How the actual fuck did that guy even make it that far in life to get a job let alone not know the fucking difference between toilet paper and paper towels?
Society is currently designed to allow its stupidest members survive.
That and the Grace of god, he seems to really like stupid people for some reason
Well mommy did dropped him off so....my guess is Mommy coddled him to the point of being majorly incompetent.
More concerned that he ate broken glass to prove the scones were edible. That's beyond being stupid, he's actually a danger to himself & others.
My guess is that his mom was pushing him to work and he didn’t want to. So he did the most stupid things so he could to get fired.
my thought is that there is something else wrong with him, brain capacity wise, that's why mom brought him, and manager didn't notice it and just call him Kevin...
Story1: So would the g/f be ok if OP went on a week-long single-tent camping trip with one of his old flames? In spite of the initial brush-off, I'm glad the g/f took OP's feelings seriously, and they were able to work out a compromise.
No - absolutely she would not have been ok with it. It's interesting how so many people on the thread regard that as 'insecurity' - I don't think any wise person, man or woman, would be okay with this situation.
@@jackspring7709 dude yes! all the people saying that it’s OK for the girlfriend to do that not only on the thread itself but it on here too is baffling. Lol it sounds like a lot of them haven’t had relationships.
that's true. but also, he wouldn't "let" her go with any of the other people either. he was uncomfortable with her going with any of said friends to the point of almost not "allowing her" to go. That's insanely controlling. Even after seeing how they interact and being relieved and all trusty, he immidiately ot suspicious of her for... what, not being visible to him the second he wakes up? like, how dare she not put her life on pause until he wakes up and wait for him to allow her stuff - she must be up to no good. He still regards to her doing regular stuff and having friends as "him letting her" in the update and still talks about her friendships as inherently bad thing and just an opportunity for her to cheat that he must prevent and still gives the "my GF is basically a cheater for having friends and i'm the good one for allowing this" vibe., so i dont think they solved the problem, just survived this particular instance of this symptom. he thinks he's the "good guy" in this situation and he "doesnt even see it as betrayal at all", per his words \\like wtf dude? WHAT DID SHE DO that makes you such a good person for not feeling betrayed? and if she did why would you be the good one for not caring?\\.he's still jealous, controlling and still thinks he has the authority to ALLOW her things.she seems very eager to immidiately please him, even at her expense, which is not a good combo AT ALL. i really really hope - for her sake - that this relationship doesnt last. Even if he gets therapy, it can only do so much. the combination of extremely jealous, controlling person that is also incredibly entitled and thinks has the authority over partner and a people pleaser that is ready to make him happy at her disadvantage and her other relationships is inherently dangerous and not good for anyone and if they were able to handle it all this wouldn't have happened in the first place. i see my opinion on this one is different from majority, but still, my two cents.
@@cheeriomartinez True - I found the naivety baffling, but I guess a lot of the commenters probably are either too young to have had much life experience or, as you point not, just not had relationships.
Well it is weird that he was willing to go camping with the other guy anyway if that guy used to sleep with his girlfriend. Not sure it’s any weirder than her going alone…..
Story 1 is it not a bit of an issue that she basically has been with all of her friends kind of a red flag to me. Sure they communicated there issues well here but the fact remains she has too many sexual partners in her life.
Clearly she doesn't have a problem with casual hook ups.
Story 1 if you hook up with someone you can't go back to a friendzone
For the second story: Either he's insanely stupid or, more than likely, I believe it's weaponized incompetence. He's TRYING to get fired, so that he can say to his mommy "I tried, but they just don't like me" or "I'm just not good enough, I guess", so that he can get out of working a job. He doesn't actually want to work, but his mom probably made him get a job, so he decided to deliberately screw up as many things as he could, in order to get fired.
Or he’s mentally challenged..if that’s the case, I actually feel really sorry for ‘ Kevin’
My thoughts exactly
How did he pass the interview? Was it an act or were there no interview to begin with?
@@alphawolfn5874 That's the question.
@@alphawolfn5874 small diner or cafe from the sounds of it so the interview was likely "here are the hours this is how everything works see you tomorrow" speaking from experience
Story 1: I don't blame them, A Walk To Remember is a real tear jerker.
Story 2: ... is Kevin okay? Seriously, eating glass is begging for internal bleeding.
Story 1: "Just don't care what other people think" the sentiment is great but what he cares about are the opinions of not only her, but also their friends and her family. You kind of _want_ those people to like you in order for the relationship to do well since they'd have the most influence (within reason of course. If they don't like you for purely selfish reasons then that's when it doesn't matter)
Kevin: Eats glass filled scones
Mark: Gets angry at whipped cream being put on scones
I love this channel 🤣
The glass could be a mistake, but whipped cream?! Hell no!
As a pastry chef I also felt pain at this XD
American here: Why is Clotted cream okay, but not whipped cream? Both are just cream. Is there a flavor difference or texture? And I thought you serve jam & cream on the plate and they add it to the scones, you are supposed to make a scone sandwich?
@@sacredruintherapeuticmassa6795 Canadian here (although living with a Brit) so take what I say with a grain of salt. Clotted cream is thicker than whipped cream and has a stronger taste, and you don't make a scone sandwich, you slice the scone in 2 and than put a little cream and a little jam (or jam than cream, it's a bit contentious lol) on both halves and eat the halves like 2 separate things. Hope this makes sense 😄
@@nathryl03 I'm from California and have had clotted cream before - yes, your assessment as to the differences sounds about right. Technically the way you described putting the cream and jam on it does result in sandwiches - _open face_ sandwiches. 😏😁
S1 (Obligatory not done with it yet): My first thought was, "I don't have problems with my husband having female friends, and hanging out, but even though I 100% trust him, I think even I'd be a little uncomfortable with just the two of them camping." And THEN I got to the part, "They liked each other for a bit throughout the years, and they had sex one summer, but it never went anywhere..." AND they'll be sharing a tent? Nope. Feelings *and sex* were involved, as well as their relationship kind of being unresolved. This could lead to trouble. Her shrugging off your worries is a red flag to me honestly. If I were in her shoes, I wouldn't want to go without my partner (especially after he's voiced his concerns), and most of my friends are guys.
Holy cow, how many of her friends has she slept with?
Aww, I'm glad y'all came up with a compromise that worked for the both of you, and that all four of you seem to get along so great! Truly heartwarming.
S2: WTAF he ate the glass?! On purpose??! I'm worried about humanity...
as i was listening to story 2 i kept asking myself "HOW can someone be THAT stupid?"
i had to pause and tell my step mom about this story and the look she gave when i got to the broken jam jar was the exact expression i had.
we both work retail. I'm mentally disabled and even I knew what to do. the only issue was to figure out what key went for the tp holders.
I believe it's weaponized incompetence. He's TRYING to get fired, so that he can say to his mommy "I tried, but they just don't like me" or "I'm just not good enough, I guess", so that he can get out of working a job.
@@kitarrah1422 Either that, or he’s the kind of person I call “lethally stupid”. The kind of person so absolutely fucking moronic, completely lacking in any sort of brain function that they’re inevitably going to end up killing either themselves or someone else with their sheer idiocy.
@@montelogan2457 Agreed.
@@kitarrah1422 his mommy needs to drop kick him out the door
@@AllistorMichelle Oh absolutely!
Love how they handled the conflict in the first story, so rare for these stories to have such a happy ending with people actually communicating, and being mature and respectful.
Ugh, I know right? Someone get a chainsaw.
Right? Seems like a lot of commenters on here are mad it didn’t end badly 😂
@@QueenOfTheZombieApocalypse Oh and you think she would tell him if she did cheat the guy is right he should have boundaries and stick with them. He is not wrong.
@@QueenOfTheZombieApocalypse No not mad but 99.9% of the time this would end badly and i still would not allow this in a relationship your basically asking for trouble and true like one guy said if they want to cheat they will but how would you find out maybe years later after getting married. Which isn't a lot of good.
@@johnwalsh518 They should really just break up. This relationship is very unstable.
I am in a friendship with a girl I was best friends with since we were teenagers. We did hook up two or three times but realized we had made a huge mistake, we were meant to be friends. We have only been friends ever since that brief moment.
That all being true, there's no way I would take her out overnight or on vacation (which a 5 day hike qualifies I would think).
That's a VERY big ask for OPs gf to bring up. I'm glad they worked it out and OP feels all went well. I don't think it qualifies as a red flag but maybe a yellow one. I'd be bothered if someone asked something like that of me even with assurances
I absolutely agree - and it amazes me how so many people see this as OP's "insecurity" - even poor OP himself is calling it an insecurity. No wise person, man or woman, would be comfortable with that situation.
The amounts of naïve people commenting about how they think it’s okay. It’s hilarious.
@@jackspring7709 insane to me. “No op you’re being insecure and controlling for not wanting your girlfriend to go out alone with an old flame” lmao ok let your SO go hang out alone with their ex then
@@mikal9904 Absolutely right.
Exactly and the fact that that one commenter told him he'd be controlling is just baffling
Story 1: I don't think what he said was "fucked up" at all.
I consider it more of a respecting your partners boundaries issue, than thinking his partner is going to cheat.
I fully trust my partner to not cheat on me, but I would be lieing if I said my partner staying alone for a week with someone he use to be sexually involved with didn't bother me.
And I'm pretty sure my partner would feel the same way.
It's great they both were able to work things out, but it is not a bad thing to set boundaries.
Haven't gotten to the ending just yet but decided to drop my two cents: A cheater is a cheater is a cheater. If she's gonna cheat then she will, no camping trip is going to decide that, she will decide that, either on this trip or any time in the future. If someone cheats it is because THEY chose to cheat.
True, but giving them the privacy to do so is not exactly smart since thats extremely easy to hide
I have a Kevin story. One of my brother's friends legit believed he "looked Hispanic because his dad ate a lot of Mexican food before he was born." He was 24 when he said this and for context he's Greek Roman though could have some Latin origins just not from Taco Bell.
No hon. It's super duper sketchy to go off to a two man tent with an ex. Even sketchier that it's a goodbye trip. They might decide to rip one off for old times sake or get in their feels because they may never see each other again or whatever overdramatic bullshyt makes people make bad decisions and cheat. And the person that was all you just have to trust and if something happens it happens if it doesn't it doesn't. But she could cheat and OP never know til they're getting divorced in 12 yrs and during the custody battle she says you can't have our little son Jimmy he's not even yours! .... So nah.
Wait. "She only has sex with men she's emotionally close to" ... "said she was even closer to ex than I originally thought so that relieved my anxiety some" - well which is it? Nevermind I don't care if she cheats. None of this story makes sense by the time you get to the end.
Story one. Don’t think your insecure. The thing about relationships is that you set boundaries and expect your s/o to follow them, and they set boundaries and you end u following theirs as well. I would be very uncomfortable with my girl going out with any sexual partners alone In general. I trust her but you never know the other person’s intentions .I love how the compromises went along in this story tho.
Yeah, been there, done that. I'm sure they didn't "cheat," they also definitely had sex.
I have to say, the girlfriend reacted the same way I do when OP talked to her about how he was feeling. She wanted to reassure him, go with any options he gave to help him feel more secure and offered to call it off to try baby steps instead. Honest, genuine people will work WITH the person who is concerned/scared/feeling bad, not against them, and more importantly will work at that person's pace, not their own. I'm so glad they found a working solution that suited everyone and it turned out so great. Cheers to adult communication and compromise!
I've been in OP's position, but unlike in this situation... my bf back then dismissed my feelings, went with this other girl on a trip anyway and guess what... things happened.
I suppose it comes down to what you're willing to do for someone you love, or unwilling to do for someone you don't love, or don't love enough.
I had a very difficult time dealing with partners going to places without me after that. Took therapy to get through it.
I love how there actually ARE people in the world willing to listen to a person's fear stemming from past trauma.
I agree but this is generally not the case as thousands of divorce stories will prove.
Yeah, great compromise. She got to have sex with the friend one more time before he got engaged, he got to be played like a fiddle.
She cheated on the trip
I like how Mark gets right to the heart of the issue - how the scones are served. (Most Americans don't recognize a scone on sight, and doesn't know or care how they're served.)
That last comment on the first story completely missed the mark. For them to say that Asking the GF not to go is controlling means they've conflated the meaning of asking as opposed to demanding or telling someone not.to do something. They're not the same thing at all.
Asking is not controlling, say it with me!
Ya no shit. Sounds like the type of person to call you controlling if you asked them not to drink at a bar alone
Nahhh brother they're trying to hard to make you believe ,That she ain't gonna cheat on you ..... Mark my words she will cheat on you and you won't know it.....
S1: I find it hysterical how so many people in the comments are saying how great that ended...lol
That's nonsense. Just because the guy was cool (had beers and did drugs together!), there wasn't going to be anything inappropriate.
Dead.
Mark, many places in the US, it's difficult to find clotted cream. Whipped cream is one substitute. Mascarpone is a better one, although it has a bit of a tang to it. My wife makes scones frequently. We usually put butter and jam on them because we rarely have anything else in the house.
Wait really, at my local farmer's there is clotted cream. But to be fair it is an international one.
I've tried to make clotted cream...I don't think that I was very successful though. As to which comes first, if you have clotted cream I think it goes first then jam. But if you have whipped cream, then jam first.
@@straightblackgirl It DOES exist here, but is hard to find. When I can find it, it's phenomenally expensive. Where I used to live, there was a tea room that imported it and sold it in their store. Prices were what you'd expect from a tea room.
@@bun04y You really need to use unpasteurized, un-homogenized milk for good results. You also have to avoid boiling the milk. Unfortunately, raw milk is not legal to sell for human consumption in many places. If you can find pasteurized milk that isn't homogenized, it might be worth a try, but I think the pasteurization breaks down the structure too much. Also, the bacteria that pasteurizing removes are helpful in the clotting process. You might try culturing it, but I have no idea what to use, and it might make it tangy. Maybe lactobacillus bulgaricus.
That’s how I eat mine anyway I don’t like cream.
I would have thought jam first.
Let me go ask my wife if I can go camping alone in the woods for a week with my ex-GF because we’re BFF’s now. Men need to establish stipulations and boundaries before giving their commitment. A real partner will avoid even the appearance of impropriety.
Does that OP really think that if something had happened on that trip they would tell him? They def banged,.
Story 1: He's going to be cheated on by her.
planning camping trips and finding people to go with is a giant pain in the butt.
So OP’s girlfriend fricked literally all of her friends mentioned both male and female. And he’s looking to turn that into a wife??? I’ll be on standby waiting for the inevitable “she ran off with her female friend and we’re now getting a divorce.” I literally know someone this happened to, for the same reason. Wife decided it was time to switch teams again and hit it with the girls. She ran off on her husband and kids and was never seen again. The kids were young too :(
Story 1: Why are some people so incapable of setting boundaries?
It's not only ok to do that in a relationship, it's outright necessary.
Like, this isn't about insecurities at all, it's simply extremely inappropriate to even just ask this in a relationship...
And yes, it goes both ways, it would be way over the line for a guy to do this too.
.
OP sounds extremely naive to a point of idiocy.
She isn't attracted to guys unless she has an emotional connection with them, so OP is cool with it? Ok... Does OP realise that Kyle is her best friend, lol?
Just the fact she seemingly slept with all her friends is a red flag.
I'm 99,9% sure that she'll cheat on OP, if not now then later.
Low value men with no backbone. My girlfriend would have told me she wanted to take a trip with a dude I would tell her to make it a one way, cause he can keep her.
BF is now newest friend. Add one more name to friends she's slept with🤦♂️ Is this story even real. I don't recognize that reality/ world. Sorry to say.
Some people are fine with that kind of thing and some aren’t. I don’t think it’s a reflection of one’s insecurity or lack thereof just because they have a boundary. It depends on how the situation is handled. To each their own.
Yeah I completely agree with you! The way it worked out for them is not the norm at all. I wouldn't be comfortable spending the night alone with a guy who isn't my husband. I'm not even comfortable being alone with any man who isn't my husband besides our relatives of course. And I definitely wouldn't feel comfortable with my husband spending the night with some girl he used to be in a relationship with or he banged. And I feel like that's a pretty normal boundary and isn't indicative of deep-seated insecurity or self-esteem issues. I also personally think it's really disrespectful to your spouse to put yourself in that kind of position where something might possibly happen or rumors might get started. It just isn't smart to deliberately put yourself in those kinds of situations especially since they are causally doing d *ugs like OP and everyone else in the story were. That's just asking for trouble and for you to make a bad decision that hurts a lot of people and ruin your life while impaired.
@@WhitneyDahlin 💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯
OP needs to say " I can't ask you not to go, but I would be lying if I said I was ok with it."
Exactly! OP repeatedly said "let her go". Ah, no! She doesn't need his permission.
But if he acknowledged that he preferred she not go from the very beginning, this issue would have been resolved in less than an hour, instead of OP fretting about it for days/weeks.
OP was lucky. He took the chance, communicated, moved forward, assessed and re-assessed, didn't let his insecurities hold him or his SO back.
In the end, things went fantastic. He grew. His and his SOs relationships grew and solidified. It sounds like the 4 people have gained a wonderful, solid foundation, for the beginning of wonderful adulthoods. Personally and workwise. I hope OP does well in his new position and is a great boss.
For me, that would be an absolute NO. If she persists in going, that would be the end.
Story 1: good luck w/ that. Hope this is fiction. Life brings facts nobody wants.
I love the amount of communication and compromise and self reflection that happened in story one. This is how healthy relationships work!!!
Oh yes, great "compromise." Been there, done that. I'm sure they didn't "cheat," they also definitely had sex.
@jakeand9020 just cuz you would cheat doesn't mean everyone does. Personally I've went through a I just need a fuck buddy and it's easier with friends then with strangers for a long term situation. But I'm still friends with some of them and we have boundaries to make our SOs comfortable.
3:17 nah, shes gaslighting the absolute F@CK out of him. Shes totally going to cheat on OP at some point.
Story1) I don't know how I feel about this one. Who keeps all their sexual exploits as friends??? I'm glad they worked it out but I dunno if this relationship will work out in the long run as it seems GF's past and the fact she keeps all her exes as friends makes OP pretty uncomfortable. I dunno, maybe it will work out! But I'd certainly always be slightly nervous around her friends (except Kyle and Anna at this point) if I was in OP's shoes. Glad they talked and worked it out atleast!
Story2) Jesus Christ Kevin!!!
Dude doesnt even realise that his girl is gonna get piped down like there is no tomorrow.
I'll never understand being friends with people you had sex with when in a relationship. Like yea I had sex with a vast majority of people in my friend group no biggie
I don't think story 1 is sweet at all. 1. OP sounds very naive and is too hard on himself. He has every right to feel some type of way about his girlfriend going on a trip alone with her ex. 2. OP said that his girlfriend only is attracted to men she has an emotional connection with so he's not worried. But then goes on to say that she has a close relationship with this guy and has already slept with him in the past. Which indicates she was attracted to him. It doesn't help she has slept with her whole friendgroup. It's no wonder OP has been cheated on in the past. No it's not his fault but selfish AHs always look for partnerts they can manipulate. Anytime he has reservations she can just tell him he's posessive.
I'm not insecure but I could never date a women who has been with her whole friend group the fact that every name that was mentioned she has slept with them is major red flag.
If your woman asks you to go camping with another dude just dump her immediately. Don't bother asking details of the camping trip, just dump her. She's definitely not worth anymore of your time.
Why does OP have a problem telling her it is totally inappropriate. Why are men so weak. Dump her at once. He's a weak pathetic sap afraid to put his own authority on his own relationship
Exactly.
The first story reminds me of a situation a few decades ago ... I was into this woman and she actually was into me but at this point, all that happened were a few long coffee dates with deep conversations. In one of these conversations she told me that a partner of hers needs be comfortable and trust her if she and her best friend (a guy) were to stay overnight in a hotel even if they had to sleep in the same bed. I internally gulped a bit but asked her if she would be if I (in case I was this partner of hers) would be in the same situation with my best friend (which happened to be a woman). She seemed a bit shaken but assured me that it would 'obviously' be ok.
So we got into a relationship and a year or so later I went to the movies with this female friend of mine. Next day my partner asked about how I spent the previous day and I told her she did not like it and was not shy about expressing her jealousy. So I calmly thinking of the conversation above asked "So sleeping in one bed would have been ok but watching a movie is ... too intimate?! " She had to give me this one ;-)
I-....never mind
1. After a close guy friend of mines GF went out of state with another male friend of ours for a trip and they ended up sleeping together, I can completely understand OP's concern. But, I'm glad it all worked out in the end.
Why does she keep around so many people that she’s had intimacy with? Why does anyone honestly?
I guess someone was pitching a tent
I love stories about Kevin. It’s one of my favorite places to hear stories from!
If someone hangs out with an ex ,one of them still wants the other.
Kevin: *puts whipped cream, jam, and broken glass in scones*
Mark: WHIPPED CREAM IN SCOONNNNES?!?!?!
Story 1: Sometimes good communication is key that can benefit a healthy relationship, I wish nothing but the best for OP, his partner, her friend and his now fiancee. I love when these relationship stories have a happy ending to them.
Story 2: Jeez, reading these Kevin stories, it's hard to believe some of these people are that dumb, what possesses a person to feed a customer broken glass?!
What possesses someone to serve a customer broken glass? Evil, that's what.
@@diarradunlap9337 Thing is, he ate the broken glass himself
I dont think he would put his own actual life on the line due to just malicious intent, him eating it himself seems like he truly thinks its not a big deal.
Stupid, yes. But evil? I get the vibe hes just mindnumbingly stupid
First story, NOT acceptable at all. She should know better but she's only thinking of what she wants.
The only response should be 'sure, you can also be single too.' If any girlfriend wants to go on a week long vacation alone with an ex (be it relationship or fling) then something is up.
It's so shitty how men have been groomed into thinking 'I don't like that you'll be alone with someone you've hooked up with for a week' is somehow controlling. It is NOT controlling. Would she be called controlling it it were the other way around? I HIGHLY doubt it.
"Hiw does someone Iike that fit into society?"
They don't Mark, they don't lol
Story 1. She's definitely gonna cheat on you. It doesn't surprise me that every single gf he's had up to that point has cheated on him. He's weak-willed, unwilling to have a single boundary, and because the dude's being all nice and buddy buddy to him he folded? Give me a break. This sounds like the exact prelude to so many infidelity stories.
"Bbbut I trusted them waaah. He seemed like such a good guy, he loved his gf he would never cheat"
Maybe the fact that every single gf before this one cheated on him should have clued him in to the fact that he's not a good judge of character.
Story 1. OP got played.. so nice
If Kevin ever goes on vacation in another country, he's gonna wake up in a tub of ice missing his kidneys within a week, if not sooner.
If he's missing both kidneys, he'll be skipping the waking up part.
@@18Hongo Not necessarily. I've heard of people surviving and ending up on dialysis - they usually don't make it for long, though.
This dude is acting like his jealousy is unwarranted, in his defense though, most people i know haven't slept with every person in their friend group.
Story 2: This reminds of the time a kid fed Gordon Ramsay a rotten scallop on Kitchen Nightmares.
Story 1: I'm glad this worked out how it did. OP's initial hesitancy isn't insecurity. That's a shady situation when you don't really know the other person involved. It's one thing to trust your partner. It's another to trust some other person you've never met.
Story 2: JFC! This guy is actually a danger to himself & others, he literally fed customers & himself broken glass! All the other stuff is idiotic & annoying but can be dealt with, but the glass incident is beyond someone being stupid & actually dangerous. Him asking if he should go to the hospital straight after makes me think it's not just extreme ignorance though because to ask that he clearly knew it actually was a dangerous thing to do.
I don't have to even hear the story because if you're girlfriend cared about you and had respect for you she wouldn't even be thinking about going at all... Sweet Baby Tiny Jesus is there any friends that she has man or woman that she hasn't slept with?! LOL
Omgosh, NOT KEVIN!! 🤣These have me cracking up all the time.. I got one.. Hey, where's the Daytona 500... WE LIVE IN FUCKING FLORIDA!! I said Kentucky 🤣
Oh, here's another one... He said, how did Obama train seals to take out Bin Laden? Wouldn't they see the seals coming out the water? How do they walk on the land..? That's when I got it 🤣🤣🤣🤣
OMG🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I think that putting jam first on a scone is what makes the most sense.
I could never be with a girl who’s slept with most of her friends. That’s too much for me, I don’t even keep contact with my exes or hookups especially if I’m in a relationship. Imagine ur gf hosting a party and half the room probably seen ur gf naked
Story 1. If both partners couldn't go the trip should be canceled. His concerns are justified considering they have a sexual history. If she can't respect that let her be single.
Kevin defo had a convo with his mum on the way to work.
Kevin: But muuuuuum why do I have to go to work?
Mum: Just see how it goes for a day, hon.
Kevin: (*flashes back to the one time his mum asked him to the dishes and he did the greasy things first) Ok mum~ mwhahaha
Uh, no, you don't have a girlfriend who goes on a week-long camping trip with an old flame...or any other man. The heck with that. What kind of boundaries do you have in your relationship?
I lost it at the girlfriends sobbing over "A Walk To Remember" while tripping balls.
Stories about Kevin is my favourite place to hear stories from but so few people really cover it! Thank you for the Kevin story, Mark!
1st story is ridiculous...no way this guy should anywhere to be found when this girl returns...you wont be controling you would be aware
Story 1, I know it all turned out all right in the end, with these particular people. but I don't know if I would have been ok with it. IMO, it was planned as a couples trip. One can't go? Ok, if the other one still wants to go and is ok being a third wheel, fine, I can see the trip still happening. But if one member of each couple can't go, and the remaining two are close/formerly hooked up? Ehh, it's not a couple's trip anymore and needs to be rescheduled.
But maybe I'm just jaded from my own experiences.
I don't understand why people get into relationships and than do things that will ruins the trust and is obviously bad situations. Like going on week long vacations.🙄
It’s crazy how much we pretend just to seem like we’re “cool”. There are plenty of situations where you have to say something isn’t okay.
Just from the title, I gotta say, going camping ALONE with an ex is a slap in the face. Even if she doesn't want to cheat, I'm assuming 1 wk vacation time is a big piece of her yearly allotment, and she's choosing to use that time with her ex instead if her partner. Nope.
Man, these come out at the PERFECT time!!
Am I the only one that thinks that the fact that she has slept with all her close friends is Big Red Flag? It's just so uncomfortable to me. Of course one would have trouble in that situation. I may not be an expert, but normally one doesn't sleep with their friends, much less with multiple friends.
Just reading the title, I'm ready to give the verdict: Bro, if she tells you this then you don't have a girlfriend, you have an ex-girlfriend.
i was going to say the same thing
EDIT: The fact that she was willing to compromise or even cancel was a good sign. However who has she not been with based on the story?
Or an unfaithful, stepping out girlfriend who ought to be an ex
Literally
This is why context matter, there is way more to this than the title suggests
Story one: glad it seems to have worked out. My Reddit indoctrinated brain is still suspicious. But hey, not my circus, not my monkeys.
I wanted to touch on something else that stood out to me in this story and a few others I've listened to the last couple of days:
When did having and expressing your personal boundaries to your partner become 'controlling'? I know I'm old school in my 40s, but what the heck?
People (younger people? 'woker' people?) seem to have forgotten all relationships are give and take. Some things you do or don't do out of respect for your partner and their boundaries. Don't cheat is a pretty easy one. Do respect your partners dietary choices (omnivore, vegetarian, vegan) is another one. And scale up from there.
The last comment before the update clearly miss the part were OP said they were sexual partners before. What person would ever be comfortable with their partner spending a long time alone with an ex-fling.
IKR? A "platonic" emotional connection? OP specifically said they'd slept together years earlier and had sort of made an attempt at a relationship (even if they never actually officially got together).
Lots of people, it is pretty normal in my extended friend group. It is also OK that people aren't ok with it. But if that is the case you probably shouldn't date someone who has had some fwb situations.
Whip cream goes on everything. Or even alone by the spoonful out of the container.
OP's GF seems to have hooked up with everyone she knows, both male and female. Compatibility is not necessary for hooking up. Opportunity is.
It might have worked out in this story.....but I still think it's concerning that a partner has to be told how this makes OP feel and brushed off his feelings.
Relationships are about respect.....but considering they both check out other people, the respect isn't there as it should be anyways.
My partner and I have the utmost respect for each other, but that doesn't mean we are dead. We watch when gorgeous women walk by and point them out to each other. I have been known to pause a movie at a sexy scene, and wait until she gets back so she can enjoy it too. If it clears up any confusion, we are both female. Looking at a good looking person isn't disrespect if you aren't looking to cheat, and if the couple is ok with it on both sides. It is normal to look at and admire a nice looking person. It is only disrespectful if you do it in front of your partner when you know he/she doesn't like it. All couples are different. What works for you may not work for me, and vice versa. :)
The fact it takes the first op longer than 3 seconds to tell her no shows what type of simp he is.
Ah, scones, reminds me of our Scotland trip and first stop in a town, south of a huge lake.
Cream, jam, without anything. Perfect to tea.
Reminded me of crumbly pastry dough from home. Didn't get homesick but now I think I'm having Fernweh.
An old flame (more like amicable ex) that op does not even know - for a week alone camping?
That is not insecurity, but is concerning af. I wouldn't be fine with that either.
Edit: that's a great update! 🤩
Op really set us up there, letting us think that Anne and his gf were sleeping together
They need to sit down and talk. He needs to tell her his feelings without down playing them. If she brushes him off, she sucks. If she listens and tells her feelings. She’s a keeper. You can’t help your insecurities and feelings. But having a healthy relationship means communicating and finding compromise.
That "you know where this is going don't you..." I did not 🤣 I thought I did but I didn't lmao 💀
First story: Well, at least these are decent people and everything worked out. This is what healthy communication looks like!
Story 2: In their defence, I don’t think clotted cream is easy to get outside the UK. In Australia, there’s thickened cream, and dollop cream (where the Bulla brand actually shows on a scone on the container)
Okay so I looked it up and there is clotted cream but there really is just one brand and it’s pricey. I’ll need to try it on scones. It is made in Australia though (Tasmania)
Story 1. I may be alone in thinking this but why would you go in a relationship with someone who have sexual relations with alsmost all her friends? In my opinion no matter how much trust you have with each other theres must be a certain boundary.
0:37 Let's stop it right here. No. And if you still want to, you are released: go see other people..live your life. Goodbye.