When she "mistook" you for the "other" black woman, she knew who you were. This was a jealousy thing. She AND her husband were looking at you? Bingo, her HUSBAND was looking at you girl, period. And your dark Senegalese chocolaty skin is beautiful. African Queen 💯
The woman in this video said that the people were ignorant, and she was right. THAT’S THE PROBLEM. Most non African ancestry people are taught that something is wrong with dark skin, but nothing is wrong with dark skin. The woman at the beach told her that she and her husband thought her skin was (too) dark. They didn’t envy her skin. They think that something was wrong with it. Let’s be honest. When people are ignorant they need to be taught. EVERYONE should LEARN about the scientific research of skin colors. Then the ignorance will fade. People of African ancestry should know the most about skin colors, due to the ignorance and discrimination. 👩🏽🦱🇺🇸
I've gotten that before. a random white woman on vacation to came over rubbed my arm and said you're soooo dark . My white friends and I gave her the craziest look.
Next time pull her hair up in a bun...hold your head up high...have a smile on your face and always look gorgeous in your appearance. By the way, alway keep flirting with your husband. Now give them something to talk about. ❤ 🙏
She was jealous of you and your husband!!! She wanted to ruin your vacation! Lexi you know you are a beautiful woman inside and out that’s the reason why you didn’t go Detroit on her! No one can take what God has given you and your husband, which is love and admiration for each other. People are haters don’t let them into your orbit!
Christina Aaliyah completely agree. you can tell how much he loves and respects her and the way he talks about the situation shows you just how much he feels deeply for her and ugh, love
She sounded jealous....your skin is smooth as anything and even toned simply gorge hun....Yes it's sad because there are too many mixed couples people etc etc for people to still be ignorant to black people being and coming in different shades
Yes, she was jealous but I actually don't think it was not a "colorism" issue, but more of racism issue. She would have had a problem with a lighter skinned woman with a white man too. She feels she's superior than black women (in all shades). Just look at how many white women hate on Meghan Markle who is very light and biracial. Some white women think we should stay in "our place." Not living it up with a quality white man on vacation. No, she probably thinks black women should be single, baby mama struggling.
@Jim Richmond So disgusting to look at such couples that you just won't leave the platform. You had to stop by and take a look. Much more than a look, you had to also comment and comment and .... So sad that that black woman rejected you. Get over your hurt. If you behave yourself, improve your look (maybe get a little tan) you may just find her.
@Jim Richmond ruclips.net/video/8jIAnvMunpY/видео.html Does this sounds like she forced herself on him? HE pursued her every stage of their relationship.
The first thing I think about is the fact that we wrestle not against flesh and blood enemies...but against principalities...against spiritual wickedness in high places. The root is not racism...its what's underneath that..which is usually pride. The best way to fight is through prayer and putting on the full armour of God. Racism is evident, however, dont let the enemy steal your joy. Know that you are more than a conqueror through Christ. There's nothing too big or small that He is not equipped to understand or handle. More so, stay prayed up. Ask God for wisdom. He will fight your battles. Love in spite of...and do not generalize the hatred and ignorance of one white person to other white people. Everyone is unique and different. Prayers for your marriage! And for God to use you in a mighty way!💕
The real turning point in my relationship with Christ was when I FOUND MY WORTH IN HIS EYES. Remember Samuel said when asked why David was chosen, “Man looks on the outer appearance but God looks at the heart”. Sadly, most times that form of ignorance people are not born with, they are taught it.
Before you said it. She does sound like she drunk....... Don't even entertain her immaturity. Some people are just lousy. You are wonderfully made in God.
I am a black woman in that space. I work professionally just about everyday being the only black person. My husband is Hispanic, but lighter skin. When I first started working in this environment, I was so nervous and intimidated. But after much prayer and talking to someone else in the same situation, I've grown to not care anymore. I realized that we MUST be in these spaces. We need to represent and not shy away from these areas. My mom taught me that people are going to talk about you anyway so give them something to look at.😁 So I just make sure I'm on point in every way. I've also learned to not take an individual's behavior to heart. If I did, I'd be mad every time I turned around and I'm not making time for that much negative energy. We need to realize they honestly don't know things and truly may be ignorant of black people or any other race. So, if they engage with me in a contrary way, my task is to educate them...and I do it as if they are my pupils. 😉
Sherese James-Grow yes I definitely agree! That’s why we ended up educating her when she was sober and had a good discussion about what happened I think it helped a lot. Education is definitely necessary. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Maybe her husband was attracted to you, so she had to say something to low your self esteem... But you are gorgeous and intelligent !! And i am proud and happy that you know that... Love from Suriname ❤
I had that experience too. Maybe her husband said something. I was a small Mexican restaurant sitting on the side near the back when I noticed a white couple looking my way with her husband was talking to her and looking my way. A white family came in and sat in front of me. I was very tired that day. On my way out while passing the white couple she said out of the blue "You look like Whoopie Goldberg". I would have ignored her if I wasn't so tired. I turned and said "You know I don't look like her. You're saying that to tried to make me feel bad because your man her thinks I'm hot!" I had no idea if he did or not, I couldn't hear them from where I was sitting. "You're just being mean. Beside, I think your man is hot too. I'll take him if you don't want him" I said that as I looked at him. Poor guy, he looked up at me smiling. Her eyes got big when she looked at him and of course she started to cry. I said "I'll still take him even if you are crying because he's probably really sweet putting up with you. But, I wouldn't give him hell." Her mouth fell open, she pulled him out of the seat and said lets go. He just kept looking at me smiling on the way out the door. Then the family called me over and said "That was brilliant! Did you actually hear them talking?" I said "No." The husband said on the way in they heard them talking and he said he thought I was very pretty to her and he liked my skin tone. She called me the "N" word and said how could you think she was attractive. The family looked around and I was the only black person in the there. When they heard what I said in a nice respectful voice, they explained to their two children how mean the woman was being because of jealousy and how brilliant it was for me to expose it. They asked me to sit down with them and discuss the situation with their children as a learning opportunity which I did for about an hour.
@@theresag1969 oh my! Lol loved this! Sounds like something out of a movie lol but I'm glad u handled that! Society has taught ppl some real nasty and stupid things .I wish ppl would wake up. But yes honey! You are gorgeous. We r all gorgeous because God made us in his image and likeness. I don't know what is wrong with ppl.
I don’t see how a comment about her dark skin would lower her self esteem. I think that should have been her response to the woman - Yes, I love my beautiful skin.
I’ve grown up in a predominantly white area including the schools that I’ve attended. I’ve noticed that questions that wouldn’t either-wise be asked to majority races (whites especially) are asked to me. I’ve had a so called friend ask me what it was like to be black and I was outraged and didn’t know how to respond with dignity, similar to your situation. It’s hard always being reminded of your skin color as if it’s a disability or defect. Gahhh we have a lot of work to do as humans. I’m so sorry that the woman felt bold enough for a lack of a better word to even confront you about your skin color? We are wonderfully and fearfully made.
I said when asked, you first tell me what's it like being white. Then I stood there waiting for him to answer like he was stupid, but I said it in a nice way. While he was trying to come up with an answer without looking racist, I said I always wondered about that.
I enjoy watching the very honest and real conversations in your videos. That woman should not be defended as being clueless, however. I believe she knew exactly what she was doing.
An Asian colleague changed my mind about avoiding uncomfortable social situations by helping me see that my attendance would do two things; help me shut the mouths of the lions, and secondly easily identify the players in the game. Let the liquor lower THEIR inhibitions, not yours. Always stay sober so YOU aren’t tempted to slap the taste out of some sponge’s mouth. People don't stop to think of the consequences of you NOT taking high road.
It's so sad that as black women we have to take on all blackdom on our shoulders every time we leave our homes. Because if we are dumped on out there in the world and then want to get a point across we're then are looked upon as the argumentative angry black woman. People don't realize how freeing it must be to just represent yourself in any situation, but it's a freedom we really have the opportunity to enjoy. If something happens with us it's looked on upon the whole race in negative terms on how we handle or don't handle a negative situation towards us. It can be exhausting to take all of that on your shoulders as just one person trying to live your life in the best way you possibly can!
I just found you guys and subscribed to your channel almost immediately. Before watching this video, I saw your subsequent vlog in which you talk about your individual racial backgrounds and how you’ve tackled this issue as a couple. And although I’ve never been in an interracial relationship, I’m so inspired by the level of depth, honesty, and emotional maturity with which you handle this topic. I feel like I’ve seen other interracial couples have discussions about race, yet none of them that I’ve seen are truly able to get to the heart of the matter as you guys do, particularly when it comes to talking about implicit bias and internal motivations of people’s racist behavior as Brian mentioned. In particular, I’m impressed by Lexi’s confidence and love for who God made her as a black woman (which can be extremely challenging when the world around us tells us that we should hate the dark skin we’re in) and Brian’s spirit of humility and willingness to learn and understand what he doesn’t know as a white person. That is extremely rare. Your authenticity (both individually and as a couple) is truly refreshing and encourages my soul in today’s climate of denial and willful ignorance, so THANK YOU for being willing to be so honest and so transparent. I have a feeling that as you continue to tell your story you are going to impact so many people and prayerfully continue to be the instruments that God uses to change hearts and minds.
What Keisa said! Lexi and Brian, God Bless you! I see and feel your mutual love and respect and Keisa has spoken to the heart of the matter. I just found you yesterday and the subscribe button is the next thing I'll click! You are a God-conscious couple, He is with you and I can't wait to see whatever you wish to share!
Am sad for what happened to you. Am a care giver in the Uk. My agency sent me to look after an elderly couple for a week... They refused to let me into their home. Like you, I didn't react, just got into my car and drove 3 hrs back home crying. But hey, I got paid for the week 😀
Chamunda S Sorry you had that experience. These old people sometimes 😒 You handled yourself well and got paid. I hope you told your agency to only place you with clients that KNOW the caregiver is Black. Don't let them waste your time 👌🏾
Girl, some people are just sheer idiots and need to be ignored. That chick was jealous from the time you walked in the room. You ignoring her pissed her off. Not stooping to her level was the right thing to do, especially on a business trip. That amazing man sitting next to you who says you are beautiful is just another reason to KNOW you are. You are nothing but gorgeous! It breaks my heart to see other AA women suffering like this. Don’t listen to the negative self-talk or those around you. Put on that crown and hold your head up high, sis! You. Are. Beautiful. 👑
New subscriber here from Trinidad....I felt hurt on your behalf....you are so beautiful, I can't stop staring at your features and smooth skin...its 2019 and we are still having these kinds of experiences?...thanks for sharing...I wish people will firstly understand that we did not choose our skin color...I have been called dark and ugly all my life...there is so much more to me besides my skin...I am at the point where I get to see people's true colors and know who I want in my circle or not...her reaction and comments to you is about her issues and not yours....we have to be like ducks and let these things roll off, of our backs and not let it get into our psyche. Best wishes to you guys.
Delores Dyer thank you so much... seeing peoples true colors is the key not just looking at face value. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate your words ❤️ and welcome to our page that so awesome to hear you are from Trinidad!
I just want to say thank you so much for this honest video! I work in wealth management and am studying to get my CFP. Only about 4-5% of people who have earned their CFP are people of color, and that's not even counting the lack of women in the field. I am currently not only the only Black woman in my department, but the only Black woman (and person) in our office (out of about 10 offices across the U.S.). Everything that you both said about being the only representation of a Black woman is so true and it brings tears to my eyes when I think about the pressure I have put on myself doing just that. I constantly overthink about my appearance, my hair, my nails, how I talk, what I say, what I don't say and everything else. I know it's a lot of pressure to put on yourself, but I also feel some responsiblity to represent Black women well and to show other women of color that the financial services field is one worth going into. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for verbalizing what I feel. It's not that I feel any prejudice at my company, but I just never know what people are thinking and I want to represent myself well as a successful Black woman and as a Christian (also, perhaps the only one in my office). I feel like God has given me tall orders, but it must be for a reason.
I subscribed to the Cole Life about 2 weeks ago. As I'm watching your experiences while on this business trip, so many memories ran through my mind of my life. But number one, I was scratching my head because you are phenomenally beautiful and I LOVE watching your husband's love, admiration and those sweet, adoring (sometimes adorably goofy) looks he gives you! 🙃❤ This woman was over the top inappropriate, insecure and immature, on top of being racist. Her jealousy showed in her actions. Her insecurities and immaturity were displayed when she became drunk on a business trip. It's never OK for one to lose one's cool, let alone on a business trip. Love you guys! You're in my prayers.
Oh good lord I thank you for healthy relationships like this. He’s so in tune. It’s refreshing to hear someone else let alone a man, speak on issues with the imagery and pressure on black women (in regard to how we’re seen).
I am 64 y.o. Shaking my head nothing has changed much. Have been in your shoes except brown skin. I get “your different “ “you are so articulate” lol. Haters are going to hate. I just don’t care what people think. I am unapologetically black. Because of that I get “you are so intimating” or the newest line because I manage over 150 people “ I feel bullied “ because I do not allow them to disrespect me. If they don’t say good morning I say it cheerfully. No matter how rude they are I am polite yet intentional. I need no ones approval to be in any space and I am comfortable being uncomfortable. You will get there. You will have to to model for you kids. After awhile you will have stock responses for the racist folks and a posture in the world that will make them think twice about coming with the nonsense. We are not angry Black women we are women with consciousness! Keep loving and growing in that love that is your safe space.
The unspoken responsibility is a thing no one talks about! You guys handled this so well and I’m glad you guys brought the conversation to RUclips! You two support each other well💚
Honestly girl , kill them with kindness and that was a perfect opportunity to say, i know right it's beautiful isn't it . I can't help i am just blessed and just Gorgeous that way. Thank you for noticing it .
I can absolutely relate to your reaction and not knowing the professional or appropriate thing to say back. I'm often just so caught off guard by the blatant ignorance that I literally freeze. Hopefully that woman educates herself before making the same mistake to someone who isn't as thoughtful as you. You're absolutely gorgeous btw, just a reminder ❤.
eritosin YES! I freeze because my first thought is to start acting crazy. And I can’t do that so I just freeze lol she did get educated we talked to her after she was sober and had a serious conversation. We felt that’s needed. Thank you so much for that compliment as well 👋🏾👋🏾
@@TheColeLife That's awesome that you guys did that! Not just pointing out the ignorance but doing something about it! I love ya'll already! God bless ❤
@@TheColeLife I'm so glad you educated her while she was so sober. Otherwise, she would have stayed ignorant. Now she consciously can choose how to talk to the next person of color. Thanks for being real and sharing your experience.
@@TheColeLife I know this experience was painful and unsettling. But could you possibly do a follow up video on the conversation you had with her while sober? What you said and her response. Going Ham is not always an option. My most important take away from this is how deeply mortified and hurt your husband looked. That is the epitome of love. Having someone to shoulder your burdens
I literally just came back from Cancun last week and a similar situation happened to me while playing volleyball on the beach, I hit the ball very hard to the other side, and Spanish man said "I have too much anger" and laughed. I did not find the comment amusing at all, I was actually offended and annoyed because I felt like he was alluding to the angry black girl stereotype. It made me really upset and I thought maybe I am overthinking it, but listening to your situation Lexi, makes me feel like I'm not alone as a dark skin woman and these subtle comments are real and hurtful. We are strong and beautiful black women in Christ! Thank you for sharing!
First, Lexi you are absolutely gorgeous! I remember a little girl that use to go to my school (DWOCA aka Fairlane Christian School) that looked just like you with an older brother that was a few years younger than me. Also, I'm so sorry that people are so ignorant. As a dark skinned woman that grew up in Michigan I can tell you that I use to get those kind of comments often. There are people that are shocked because you're beautiful AND dark skinned. It's crazy! BTW, in other states, particularly the west coast, I've never received negative comments about my skin color. I've noticed that certain parts of the country that are more segregated tend to have these issues more often.
Vonda V. OMG THAT WAS ME!!!! 👋🏾👋🏾👋🏾 I went there!!! I think you are absolutely right! I truly believe it’s different in different states. My friend from Austin TX says she NEVER had these issues. It’s crazy because as far as history, weren’t we more open to change than the south ?? 🤔🤔
I love that you are who you are. I have been in that situation at my job as a RN. I remember hanging out with my peers who were white one weekend at a club. Someone bumped into one of them and she was drunk at the time. That drunk coworker confronted the person that bumpedinto her and slurringly nominated me to fight for her saying that because I am black, that's how we all handle things. She was so wrong and I left her there. Lol She learned that day that she was very wrong. Seeing how she really felt about me during that situation, I no longer had anything to do with her. As the saying goes, "what's done in the dark will surely come to light."
Another honest conversation. My daughter is often the only black in her professional meetings, training sessions, etc. and faces similar circumstances. She is very wise and Christ-centered and deals with ignorance with great grace, as you did. Blessings and favor upon you both!
You are so beautiful girl and I'm so proud of how you both handled the situation, I've never experienced racism like that and I could not promise that I wouldn't have told that woman off..you guys are strong
Listen! I don’t know who you people are BUT I love you both! I just came across you “How Did We Meet” video and have been catching up on the rest of your videos!! First of all YOU Lex are BEAUTIFUL, but you already know that 😉 and your husband is freakin beautiful as well! You guys are beautiful from the inside out and it’s so refreshing to watch!!! I have never been in an interracial relationship so I don’t understand that journey , but I do understand the black in the workplace struggle far too well. I have to honestly work twice as hard at my job, I see others get away with things I could NEVER...I have far too many stories to share and I have to always carry the load of representing myself well so that (like you said) I represent black women well! It’s not a easy load to carry but being a black woman it is my load to carry. So many people don’t understand the daily struggles of a BLACK WOMAN and it can be lot sometimes, but we continue to push through. I am a new subscriber and I wish you BOTH abundance, love and joy!!!!
You guys are amazing in how you handle everything thrown at you, considering all sides, with contemplation, grace and professionalism. Much admiration! P.S. you're gorgeous, Lexi!
The black struggle is real. It’s literally everywhere we go. Imagine if you were the employee actually attending the conference, it gets even more stressful. You did well handling this sis! On another note, you two are too nice to that lady. She is NOTclueless. This was her very subtle- not subtle way of being racist! Epic micro aggression! She should’ve had those conversations with her husband, but she went out of her way to let Lexi know exactly what she was thinking and she kept going at it again and again. That’s not ignorance, that’s racist!
Thank you! It's not your job to educate! Including HR and being technical about it was smart to cover their back. They were wise on that part. However, a few home truths about the woman herself would have served her well. White woman are babied too much. To the point they know they can get away with incidents such as this - and even murder! This reminds me of the Amber Guyger/Botham Jean case. Honestly sometimes I feel when Christians do this whole, "what would Jesus do?" they forget who the hec Jesus was. And most importantly, they forget who the hec God Is! Like they're stuck on John 3:16 and didn't read the rest of the bible (old and new testament). God don't play. And neither did Jesus. He'd pick up a stick and chase the heathens out of the temple! Li-te-ra-lly! Call hypocrisy out to the faces of those causing trouble. Not just educate, but expose! And he never had time for foolishness. The stories you hear of him being forgiving, e.g. Zaccheus, Mary, Peter, where to those who yearned to learn and extended a branch to Jesus. Zaccheus literally climbed a tree just to see and hear him speak. Otherwise, God didn't waste his time with the ignorant who yearned to not learn/change. He was actually very irritated by them. Ananias and Sapphira anyone? (Acts 5: 1-11) When somebody shows you who they are, BELIEVE THEM and show them who you are. You're an apostle of God; NOT of racism. Racism is NOT your God. Honestly, I know this happens often but sometimes drunk or not I feel racist people know who to try. They can tell who the forever forgivers are. Be careful that people do not sense this trait and continuosly test your patience and your faith. I'm not trying to sound militant, but at times you have to be because if your body is to be a temple of God you must guard your body, mind, soul and spirit from principalities and powers. Let those who wish to be better, be blessed.
I love how you said God prepared you by building up your self esteem and confidence so no one can disrupt that...by the same token, it's like trying to reopen a closed wound, but I believe you too have such a strong foundation that can weather these storms and be change agents in your community and in the world. Keep the love on board because it definitely radiates.
Lexie you guys are experiencing what has been done to us since the beginning. So wonderful that knowing the Lord as Savior is priceless because He gives you peace that passes understanding! Mayo Angelo wrote an awesome uplifting poem about being a black woman ❤
Lexi you did a GOOD thing by not giving her the response that would be used against us. Soo honourable girll. Thanks for being soo strong. 💪🏾❤️❤️❤️🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
You two are very blessed to have one another. It’s absolutely impressive that your husband gets it and supports you emotionally. It’s amazing! This is so important. The two of you are beautiful, I’m sorry people were not classy enough to just be quiet if they didn’t have anything of substance to say to you. Enjoy the weather 👋🏾💜🌹and thanks for sharing 💜
Very intelligent, real and honest conversation. Also, an important conversation to share, as you acknowledge to yourself in your inner thought process, as well as in your "attitude" (when you are exposed to that kind of ignorance) -- that your color is beautiful. After that acknowledgement to yourself, (coupled with ignoring whatever comments, odd looks, jokes, that comes your way) -- Laugh to yourself and know that you must be the superior one in the deepest recesses of their minds -- Otherwise, why would they even expend their energy & time -- to go out of their way -- to deliberately make you feel uncomfortable, if they "truly" felt superior to you.
I am so sorry this has happened to you!! You are gorgeous! All of your shades are beautiful!! I am so glad that you and your husband already know this!!!
You are gorgeous inside and out because I would’ve lost my religion for a good 5 mins but that’s when realization takes over and you realize GOD has it ! Stay Blessed !
i can definitely relate to you. I'm in an interracial marriage and I am in a management position as the only "sista." It is so annoying and difficult to juggle these types of uncomfortable situations. My nature would be to tell her off or knock her out....but we must represent well so that we're not "labeled." I'm glad you all handled the situation. I know you don't need me to tell you this but you are a Beautiful Black Woman inside and out. No one can take that away from you or say anything differently. I love the support and awareness that your husband has in these type of complex racial situations. Love you guys and keep doing what you're doing!!! :)
First Lady Michelle Obama said it best, "when they go low, we go high". Never lower yourself to a conversation as such rise above it and walk away. Sign of maturity on your part, my little sister. Love your channel as a couple. You guys rock!!!
I know you know bc u're very secure in who you are & who's you are, but this is the 3rd video I've watched so it caught me off guard but yet I'm still smiling bc U're so Beautuful & ur smile makes me smile. I so admire & love ur love between u both. You know the crazy thing is i never comment but i know it's all God. Y'all truly are an inspirational couple that wear true pure anointed Agape(Love). Keep shining & smiling Lexi You got ur Boaz & you both Look good 2gether🙏🏽
Dedon91, Why should you leave? As long as your hair is well kept. You should have asked the person who told you that to please give that to you in writing. There are some good and crooked 😂 lawyers that would have taken you to the bank with that statement. You must learn to be wise as a serpent and as harmless as a dove.
I used to have comments like that when growing up. My mom always reminded me that “black is beautiful” dark and lovely! That’s what my mom said to us. Don’t be bothered u stood out because you are not only black but also beautiful. U stood out because you are different there’s nothing wrong with that. What that lady really wanted to say is but was not humble enough to say it is” how can I be like you? Show me how?
Thank you guys for sharing this story. It's sad how ignorant people can be. Lexi, you're gorgeous!! ❤ you guys! I have had patients turn down my assistance and ask for the other pharmacist to help them instead.
I have such a hard time understanding how people can maintain these levels of ignorance and seemingly not comprehend how hateful and harmful this is to us. And I say us as in "us", the whole human race. Our differences are so beautiful and enlightening for our spiritual growth. It hurts my soul that I can't even go to the grocery store with my inter-ethnic son and not catch some ignorant person giving us the side eye 🙄 I don't know everything or understand everything but I have tried to make it a point to educate myself from a young age and come to a point of understanding and realization of the issues we face in this society regarding ethnicities and the melanin content of a person's skin. I love you guys and respect your willingness to be open with your relationship for all to see. Keep it up!!
Wow! That is really unbelievable for anyone who is grown to say it. I understand your "lack of a response" is really a response that is appropriate for the situation. Been there and reacted the same. You did well. Both of you.
Your inner and outer beauty and strength awes me. Your melanin gives me LIFE queen. You are an amazing role model to so many of us black woman. ✊🏿✊🏽✊🏾😍
I have been shocked to paralysis too many times by the blatant racism of alleged friends, family & even strangers. Your experience is eerily similar to one I encountered on a beach in NC when I was 18 (10 years ago) A drunk, white woman approached me...stumbling and all. I was so confused because she B-lined across the beach straight to me and I had no idea who she was. She attempted to tell me a joke through her slurred speech & all I could make out was the end of the joke was something about "Sand N-words" I was so disgusted and appalled it apparently startled HER (??) and she tried to embrace me & I snatched away from the nut. I'll never understand it but you and your husband's willingness to address these issues is too refreshing! Love
Yes. She sounds like she was jealous of you and that her husband was looking at you. I'm sad you had to go through that but all you and Brian can do is just pray for them. I mean its even worst worse now since everything that's going on. My hats off to you and Brian for the way you handled it and is handling it. Brian looks like he's about to cry. Come after she knew you wasn't the same girl just proves who and what she is? Love you guys and continue praying that things will get better than they are and was before all this craziness. 🙏🙏🙏😪😪💕💕💕 Thank you for sharing!!!!🌹🌹🌹 I'm glad he was asleep cause you know Brian is protective . God's got you both.
I relate to this so much. Mos def has a song where he says “sitting in the sun getting as black as I want” and that lyric stayed in my heart which was powerful since so much of the narrative for dark skin children is to stay out of the sun
If it happens agains,smile and say "I Thank God for blessing me with this beautiful skin which I appreciate and cherish so much" Don't let them get to you,your the most beautiful person I've seen..most people who likes to comment about color and such,they are miserable in their own,they have self esteem issues that's why they drag other people to negativity. Stay blessed and beautiful..love from South Africa
From the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks....& that’s scripture. Although you both were representing each other (Brian, the company & Lexi, her husband) you both are representations of God. Keep shining. ☀️❤️ #LordHelpUsAll
Lexi - you are BEAUTIFUL!!! As a dark skin woman, I totally understand. I'm glad we can be comfortable in our skin. Thank you for talking about this issue. As we climb up the corporate later it does not get easier. The organization I work for is trying to address the issues and stereotypes of people. I just accepted a job inside of the organization where I work and I'm the only black woman. I'm a little nervous because not only am I darkskin, but I have natural hair. Sigh...The things we go through as dark skin women.
shaylas78 yessss omg preach. This is our life’s journey but stay Strong God has made our skin soooo glorious, smooth & different, from others and so beautiful. It’s mostly envy! I’m telling you! We are truly blessed and less wrinkles, God bless all us beautiful dsw globally ❤️💓🖤💚 we cope with colorism, racism, and sexism and do it unbothered. We rise above the hate 🙏🏾
I completely understand your pain and struggle because I'm black and my husband is white in Germany so we always get stares but no comments, but I hate when someone refers to our relationship as "interracial"... What is "interracial"? Are you implying that one of us is not human? Ignorance! You are beautiful love and very strong because I honestly cannot say how I would have responded. Continue to be great and beautiful.
It hurts my heart that you had to endure this type of treatment. I know it happens all day every day to many people, but I applaud you for being transparent and vulnerable about your experiences. Conversations and educating people about the harsh realities we live in today, I believe, is the first step to making a change. Bringing awareness to the topic of race is the only way we can learn and grow. I commend you both for using your platform to discuss these topics. May God bless you both.
You are so beautiful! When people tell me to stay out of the sun because in THEIR own personal opinion I’m the “perfect” color... I can’t help but look at them like their as crazy as they are because I LOVE being black and I LOVE when the sun tans my skin in the summer. Keep being classy and confident you- representing us black women OF ALL COMPLEXIONS so very well
You two are beautiful human beings. I found out I was "black" at 30. I never knew there was a difference. I reject colorism amongst humans. I save it for coloring with crayons. Ignorance is rampant. Stay strong! You are a beautiful woman and your husband a handsome man, two humans who found love in the name of the Divine. Peace & Love.
Hi Lexis. Both my sisters were lighter skin. I grew up feeling ugly. When people say u are dark but u you are beautiful. Why cant they say U BEAUTIFUL PERIOD. These stereotypes are irritating. I know hurt u were. U beautiful Darling. U are fearfully and wonderfully made. Glad you'll are speaking about these things. People are hurting
Been looking at your vlogs and my first comment. As a couple, please don't let what other people think of you both.God put you togather in holy matrimony so let no man put a sounder. Stay strong and concentrate more on your love for each other and the future, stay prayed up at all times, you are both a beautiful couple....bless up to you both..... 🇹🇹❤🙏
The political climate has ignorance to a all time high😤 since this was your husbands job trip you handle yourself well. I love your channel because you are truly helping many and getting the conversations flowing. I am not in a interracial relationship but your vid popped up and you both were so honest and cute as hell that I subscribed because you are having honest discussions about what is happening in our country
Lexi you handled it well and I am so proud of you. She was ignorant, irresponsible and rude.. You are a strong beautiful black woman that has grace, positivity, confidence and so much love in you heart. Do not let the enemy destroy you. God is in control and he has you covered. Thank you for sharing and I love you both. 🤗❤🤗❤
You could have and should have taken the time to educate this woman because it is obvious she needed some learning to do. You don’t have to be rude with your direction but just informative. You both are so wonderful love watching you
I really enjoyed this video! I am African American and was raised in the military. That meant I was often one of the few ‘Negroes’ on the base, in school. I was often initially looked at curiously by my classmates, who then asked their questions, and we then moved on with playing. It was the teachers and other adults that seemed surprised that I read so well, or always won the class spelling bees, or aced the math quizzes, and would let me know how pleased they were to see that I was so “exceptional”. I was an adult when my father and I were talking about a particular teacher that gave me a lot of grief that I couldn’t understand. She would often tell me she needed to speak to my parents. This always terrified me, because I thought I was going to get in trouble at home. My dad would go to the school, come back home, and tell me I should be more ladylike when I was sitting (I was a tomboy). It was in that adult conversation, he told me she was a racist and that I was too arrogant (his word) to think anyone would not like me because of the color of my skin; and he was determined to keep it that way. I am forever grateful to him for sparing me THAT burden during my formative years. Teach your children to know themselves through the eyes of God: that they are beautiful and wondrous creations. He’ll give them the wisdom to handle the foolish and ignorant people that they will have the opportunity to bless!
I looked at this video from so many angles however I believed you handled yourself very well and your husband probably would have done with my husband wanted to do if that situation happened. The hardest thing about ignorance and responding or reacting to it is but that person has inner things are deeper things in them that only God can heal. I too am a dark-skinned woman I am an African woman and I love that my parents raised us to love who we are growing up we faced a lot of the name calling actually not from white people at all the mostly from fellow black people so I believe sometimes that's even harder. However with the situation that you went through and realizing and understanding your on a vacation and I love how you acknowledge at even at your age you guys are so wise I love it, I'm not going to react to this woman however I believe your RUclips channel is going to educate people. I am usually the only person of color at a lot of places with living in PA however I believe confidence get you so far in life I welcome questions I do not welcome ignorance however I know that you are very educated confident beautiful woman and you are married to someone who loves you, I mean the person of who you are beyond your shade beyond all those things and I think it's wonderful especially before having kids that you guys are realizing all of these different things. there is so much more to say however it's easier to say it then write it but I'm very proud of you guys keep up the great work love the channel.
Your smart, beautiful and wonderful made! Your chocolate skin is flawless and gorgeous!!!! Your blessed to have a husband that is aware, and understands. Also, that your both socially conscious of the ignorance and how to handle it. Keep being a light, hopefully it will enlighten the minds of many! Thanks for sharing! New subscriber ❤️.
What a lovely tan you got on the trip, Lexi! In my head I would have winked and told her, "Yes, and since you're trying to get darker, this is your goal, dear!" I love the beach and I always look forward to getting some bronze on this skin every year! Unfortunatley, I still have to educate even some of my friends on their perceptions because I live in the South. Even my mom hates my natural hair. You can't waste time on living your best life because people are ignorant about the diversity of the world. God loves variety and He deliberately made me to look like this. It's the people we are on the inside that counts and how we treat others like Jesus did. I love good humans, not colors or other uncontrollable outside attributes and I see that in your relationship too and wish you two all the best!
When she "mistook" you for the "other" black woman, she knew who you were. This was a jealousy thing. She AND her husband were looking at you? Bingo, her HUSBAND was looking at you girl, period. And your dark Senegalese chocolaty skin is beautiful. African Queen 💯
I'm new to the channel, her roots are from Senegal? I assumed she was African American like me.
The woman in this video said that the people were ignorant, and she was right. THAT’S THE PROBLEM. Most non African ancestry people are taught that something is wrong with dark skin, but nothing is wrong with dark skin. The woman at the beach told her that she and her husband thought her skin was (too) dark. They didn’t envy her skin. They think that something was wrong with it. Let’s be honest.
When people are ignorant they need to be taught. EVERYONE should LEARN about the scientific research of skin colors. Then the ignorance will fade. People of African ancestry should know the most about skin colors, due to the ignorance and discrimination. 👩🏽🦱🇺🇸
Next time someone tells you that you are so dark, show your beautiful white smile, and say Or
Thank you so much ❤️ that means a lot.
I've gotten that before. a random white woman on vacation to came over rubbed my arm and said you're soooo dark . My white friends and I gave her the craziest look.
I agree.. Smile and say Yes I am.. isn't it exquisite !! and sashay away... You are so beautiful , don't let some dullard try to dim your light..
Exactly! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏿👏🏿
Next time pull her hair up in a bun...hold your head up high...have a smile on your face and always look gorgeous in your appearance. By the way, alway keep flirting with your husband. Now give them something to talk about. ❤ 🙏
You are drop dead gorgeous Lexi....
WA Henry thank you 🙌🏾😩😩😭😭
Yes she is!!! 😍
That woman was jealous of your ABSOLUTE GORGEOUSNESS Full Stop!!
I think your skin tone is absolutely gorgeous, your color is regal, royal, rich, and beautiful!
Thank you for being open and honest in your video! So many people aren't bold enough to say something. Stay blessed
Heyyy siiisss... girl, girl, girl
Your complexion is beautiful!!!
You are so BEAUTIFUL!! Twirl on them haters 💃🏾💃🏾💃🏾
OMG....the whole time I'm watching I'm saying to myself how Alexis reminds me of Kenya Moore and then see your comment....hmmmm. :-)
She was jealous of you and your husband!!! She wanted to ruin your vacation! Lexi you know you are a beautiful woman inside and out that’s the reason why you didn’t go Detroit on her! No one can take what God has given you and your husband, which is love and admiration for each other. People are haters don’t let them into your orbit!
Sir, you have a strong black beautiful woman, who cares about your haters, they have no life!!!
Camille Davis people say I look like kenya all the time also. I can see it in this beauty also ❤️
This woman knew exactly what she was saying, she didn't studdor this was straight from the heart.
Your hubby is a king 👑 So understanding and intelligent
Christina Aaliyah completely agree. you can tell how much he loves and respects her and the way he talks about the situation shows you just how much he feels deeply for her and ugh, love
You are Stunning,absolutely Gloriously Stunning child of God..Stay Lifted and Positive...
Honey Justin thank you so much ❤️
She sounded jealous....your skin is smooth as anything and even toned simply gorge hun....Yes it's sad because there are too many mixed couples people etc etc for people to still be ignorant to black people being and coming in different shades
elana604 right! You would think this has passed smh
Thank you so much for your words it’s always helpful to hear that ❤️❤️
Yes, she was jealous but I actually don't think it was not a "colorism" issue, but more of racism issue. She would have had a problem with a lighter skinned woman with a white man too. She feels she's superior than black women (in all shades). Just look at how many white women hate on Meghan Markle who is very light and biracial. Some white women think we should stay in "our place." Not living it up with a quality white man on vacation. No, she probably thinks black women should be single, baby mama struggling.
@Jim Richmond So disgusting to look at such couples that you just won't leave the platform. You had to stop by and take a look. Much more than a look, you had to also comment and comment and .... So sad that that black woman rejected you. Get over your hurt. If you behave yourself, improve your look (maybe get a little tan) you may just find her.
@Jim Richmond
ruclips.net/video/8jIAnvMunpY/видео.html
Does this sounds like she forced herself on him? HE pursued her every stage of their relationship.
The first thing I think about is the fact that we wrestle not against flesh and blood enemies...but against principalities...against spiritual wickedness in high places. The root is not racism...its what's underneath that..which is usually pride. The best way to fight is through prayer and putting on the full armour of God.
Racism is evident, however, dont let the enemy steal your joy. Know that you are more than a conqueror through Christ. There's nothing too big or small that He is not equipped to understand or handle.
More so, stay prayed up. Ask God for wisdom. He will fight your battles. Love in spite of...and do not generalize the hatred and ignorance of one white person to other white people. Everyone is unique and different.
Prayers for your marriage! And for God to use you in a mighty way!💕
NaturallyGorg85 absolutely in full agreement Amen
Keep on encouraging and be the light you are thanks sis
The real turning point in my relationship with Christ was when I FOUND MY WORTH IN HIS EYES. Remember Samuel said when asked why David was chosen, “Man looks on the outer appearance but God looks at the heart”. Sadly, most times that form of ignorance people are not born with, they are taught it.
Before you said it. She does sound like she drunk....... Don't even entertain her immaturity. Some people are just lousy.
You are wonderfully made in God.
I am a black woman in that space. I work professionally just about everyday being the only black person. My husband is Hispanic, but lighter skin. When I first started working in this environment, I was so nervous and intimidated. But after much prayer and talking to someone else in the same situation, I've grown to not care anymore. I realized that we MUST be in these spaces. We need to represent and not shy away from these areas. My mom taught me that people are going to talk about you anyway so give them something to look at.😁 So I just make sure I'm on point in every way. I've also learned to not take an individual's behavior to heart. If I did, I'd be mad every time I turned around and I'm not making time for that much negative energy. We need to realize they honestly don't know things and truly may be ignorant of black people or any other race. So, if they engage with me in a contrary way, my task is to educate them...and I do it as if they are my pupils. 😉
Sherese James-Grow yes I definitely agree! That’s why we ended up educating her when she was sober and had a good discussion about what happened I think it helped a lot. Education is definitely necessary. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Maybe her husband was attracted to you, so she had to say something to low your self esteem...
But you are gorgeous and intelligent !! And i am proud and happy that you know that...
Love from Suriname ❤
Very plausible. The woman could have also been lying. Her husband might not have said anything derogatory at all
@@@dreamchaser5758 I totally agree..
I had that experience too. Maybe her husband said something.
I was a small Mexican restaurant sitting on the side near the back when I noticed a white couple looking my way with her husband was talking to her and looking my way. A white family came in and sat in front of me. I was very tired that day. On my way out while passing the white couple she said out of the blue "You look like Whoopie Goldberg". I would have ignored her if I wasn't so tired. I turned and said "You know I don't look like her. You're saying that to tried to make me feel bad because your man her thinks I'm hot!" I had no idea if he did or not, I couldn't hear them from where I was sitting. "You're just being mean. Beside, I think your man is hot too. I'll take him if you don't want him" I said that as I looked at him. Poor guy, he looked up at me smiling. Her eyes got big when she looked at him and of course she started to cry. I said "I'll still take him even if you are crying because he's probably really sweet putting up with you. But, I wouldn't give him hell." Her mouth fell open, she pulled him out of the seat and said lets go. He just kept looking at me smiling on the way out the door.
Then the family called me over and said "That was brilliant! Did you actually hear them talking?" I said "No." The husband said on the way in they heard them talking and he said he thought I was very pretty to her and he liked my skin tone. She called me the "N" word and said how could you think she was attractive. The family looked around and I was the only black person in the there. When they heard what I said in a nice respectful voice, they explained to their two children how mean the woman was being because of jealousy and how brilliant it was for me to expose it. They asked me to sit down with them and discuss the situation with their children as a learning opportunity which I did for about an hour.
@@theresag1969 oh my! Lol loved this! Sounds like something out of a movie lol but I'm glad u handled that! Society has taught ppl some real nasty and stupid things .I wish ppl would wake up. But yes honey! You are gorgeous. We r all gorgeous because God made us in his image and likeness. I don't know what is wrong with ppl.
I don’t see how a comment about her dark skin would lower her self esteem. I think that should have been her response to the woman - Yes, I love my beautiful skin.
I’ve grown up in a predominantly white area including the schools that I’ve attended. I’ve noticed that questions that wouldn’t either-wise be asked to majority races (whites especially) are asked to me. I’ve had a so called friend ask me what it was like to be black and I was outraged and didn’t know how to respond with dignity, similar to your situation. It’s hard always being reminded of your skin color as if it’s a disability or defect. Gahhh we have a lot of work to do as humans. I’m so sorry that the woman felt bold enough for a lack of a better word to even confront you about your skin color? We are wonderfully and fearfully made.
Dominique Wilson thank you for sharing that is absolutely true and but the last thing you said is THE TRUTH “fearfully and wonderfully”
I said when asked, you first tell me what's it like being white. Then I stood there waiting for him to answer like he was stupid, but I said it in a nice way. While he was trying to come up with an answer without looking racist, I said I always wondered about that.
You are a beautiful couple inside and out God bless you both
Carla Benjamin thank you! God bless you as well.
I just love how your husband loves and protects you, may these negative things bring you even closer...
Amen!
I enjoy watching the very honest and real conversations in your videos. That woman should not be defended as being clueless, however. I believe she knew exactly what she was doing.
Mrs Cole, you have beautiful, gorgeous skin! I applaud you for handling the situation in a mature way. Some people are so ignorant!
An Asian colleague changed my mind about avoiding uncomfortable social situations by helping me see that my attendance would do two things; help me shut the mouths of the lions, and secondly easily identify the players in the game. Let the liquor lower THEIR inhibitions, not yours. Always stay sober so YOU aren’t tempted to slap the taste out of some sponge’s mouth. People don't stop to think of the consequences of you NOT taking high road.
YASSSSS!!!! People need to thank the Lord every day that people don't do and say everything their behavior deserves!
It's so sad that as black women we have to take on all blackdom on our shoulders every time we leave our homes. Because if we are dumped on out there in the world and then want to get a point across we're then are looked upon as the argumentative angry black woman. People don't realize how freeing it must be to just represent yourself in any situation, but it's a freedom we really have the opportunity to enjoy. If something happens with us it's looked on upon the whole race in negative terms on how we handle or don't handle a negative situation towards us. It can be exhausting to take all of that on your shoulders as just one person trying to live your life in the best way you possibly can!
I just found you guys and subscribed to your channel almost immediately. Before watching this video, I saw your subsequent vlog in which you talk about your individual racial backgrounds and how you’ve tackled this issue as a couple. And although I’ve never been in an interracial relationship, I’m so inspired by the level of depth, honesty, and emotional maturity with which you handle this topic. I feel like I’ve seen other interracial couples have discussions about race, yet none of them that I’ve seen are truly able to get to the heart of the matter as you guys do, particularly when it comes to talking about implicit bias and internal motivations of people’s racist behavior as Brian mentioned. In particular, I’m impressed by Lexi’s confidence and love for who God made her as a black woman (which can be extremely challenging when the world around us tells us that we should hate the dark skin we’re in) and Brian’s spirit of humility and willingness to learn and understand what he doesn’t know as a white person. That is extremely rare. Your authenticity (both individually and as a couple) is truly refreshing and encourages my soul in today’s climate of denial and willful ignorance, so THANK YOU for being willing to be so honest and so transparent. I have a feeling that as you continue to tell your story you are going to impact so many people and prayerfully continue to be the instruments that God uses to change hearts and minds.
What Keisa said! Lexi and Brian, God Bless you! I see and feel your mutual love and respect and Keisa has spoken to the heart of the matter. I just found you yesterday and the subscribe button is the next thing I'll click! You are a God-conscious couple, He is with you and I can't wait to see whatever you wish to share!
Am sad for what happened to you. Am a care giver in the Uk. My agency sent me to look after an elderly couple for a week... They refused to let me into their home. Like you, I didn't react, just got into my car and drove 3 hrs back home crying. But hey, I got paid for the week 😀
Why were you crying? Do you not like the skin God gave you?
@@sharonedwards3601 my feelings as well I love my dark skin and I look down on any one who don't like their skin colour I think their just sad
I hope you spent that entire weeks salary on yourself 💜
@@sharonedwards3601 it hurt to know there was such hate directed at her. Very understandable and nothing to do with this lady's view about herself.
Chamunda S Sorry you had that experience. These old people sometimes 😒 You handled yourself well and got paid. I hope you told your agency to only place you with clients that KNOW the caregiver is Black. Don't let them waste your time 👌🏾
So proud of the way you guys handled that unfortunate situation🤗🤗🤗
Neasey Hendrix thank you! It was difficult but we kept our peace.
Girl, some people are just sheer idiots and need to be ignored. That chick was jealous from the time you walked in the room. You ignoring her pissed her off. Not stooping to her level was the right thing to do, especially on a business trip.
That amazing man sitting next to you who says you are beautiful is just another reason to KNOW you are. You are nothing but gorgeous! It breaks my heart to see other AA women suffering like this. Don’t listen to the negative self-talk or those around you. Put on that crown and hold your head up high, sis! You. Are. Beautiful. 👑
New subscriber here from Trinidad....I felt hurt on your behalf....you are so beautiful, I can't stop staring at your features and smooth skin...its 2019 and we are still having these kinds of experiences?...thanks for sharing...I wish people will firstly understand that we did not choose our skin color...I have been called dark and ugly all my life...there is so much more to me besides my skin...I am at the point where I get to see people's true colors and know who I want in my circle or not...her reaction and comments to you is about her issues and not yours....we have to be like ducks and let these things roll off, of our backs and not let it get into our psyche. Best wishes to you guys.
Delores Dyer thank you so much... seeing peoples true colors is the key not just looking at face value. Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate your words ❤️ and welcome to our page that so awesome to hear you are from Trinidad!
@@TheColeLife Thank you...having fun looking at your past videos...hugs to you
I just want to say thank you so much for this honest video! I work in wealth management and am studying to get my CFP. Only about 4-5% of people who have earned their CFP are people of color, and that's not even counting the lack of women in the field. I am currently not only the only Black woman in my department, but the only Black woman (and person) in our office (out of about 10 offices across the U.S.). Everything that you both said about being the only representation of a Black woman is so true and it brings tears to my eyes when I think about the pressure I have put on myself doing just that. I constantly overthink about my appearance, my hair, my nails, how I talk, what I say, what I don't say and everything else. I know it's a lot of pressure to put on yourself, but I also feel some responsiblity to represent Black women well and to show other women of color that the financial services field is one worth going into. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for verbalizing what I feel. It's not that I feel any prejudice at my company, but I just never know what people are thinking and I want to represent myself well as a successful Black woman and as a Christian (also, perhaps the only one in my office). I feel like God has given me tall orders, but it must be for a reason.
I subscribed to the Cole Life about 2 weeks ago. As I'm watching your experiences while on this business trip, so many memories ran through my mind of my life. But number one, I was scratching my head because you are phenomenally beautiful and I LOVE watching your husband's love, admiration and those sweet, adoring (sometimes adorably goofy) looks he gives you! 🙃❤
This woman was over the top inappropriate, insecure and immature, on top of being racist. Her jealousy showed in her actions. Her insecurities and immaturity were displayed when she became drunk on a business trip. It's never OK for one to lose one's cool, let alone on a business trip. Love you guys! You're in my prayers.
I love your skin tone! Your style and the colours that you wear enhance it even more : )
Oh good lord I thank you for healthy relationships like this. He’s so in tune. It’s refreshing to hear someone else let alone a man, speak on issues with the imagery and pressure on black women (in regard to how we’re seen).
That other person embarrassed herself terribly. Even young children have more sense than that.
Self confidence in your own skin while respecting others.
I am 64 y.o. Shaking my head nothing has changed much. Have been in your shoes except brown skin. I get “your different “ “you are so articulate” lol. Haters are going to hate. I just don’t care what people think. I am unapologetically black. Because of that I get “you are so intimating” or the newest line because I manage over 150 people “ I feel bullied “ because I do not allow them to disrespect me. If they don’t say good morning I say it cheerfully. No matter how rude they are I am polite yet intentional. I need no ones approval to be in any space and I am comfortable being uncomfortable. You will get there. You will have to to model for you kids. After awhile you will have stock responses for the racist folks and a posture in the world that will make them think twice about coming with the nonsense. We are not angry Black women we are women with consciousness! Keep loving and growing in that love that is your safe space.
The unspoken responsibility is a thing no one talks about! You guys handled this so well and I’m glad you guys brought the conversation to RUclips! You two support each other well💚
So many thoughts 😣 It's just crazy how you have to automatically have a guard up. Anywho, girl you're beyond beautiful 💕
Kamyla Sykes I know!!!! Ugh it’s absolutely ridiculous smh! Thank you I appreciate it
Love you guys’ openness. Content is great, keep it up fam. Love y’all!
Thanks bro we really appreciate the support love you you bro
Honestly girl , kill them with kindness and that was a perfect opportunity to say, i know right it's beautiful isn't it . I can't help i am just blessed and just Gorgeous that way. Thank you for noticing it .
The best come back ever!
Girl, beauty is YOU🙏🏾
I can absolutely relate to your reaction and not knowing the professional or appropriate thing to say back. I'm often just so caught off guard by the blatant ignorance that I literally freeze. Hopefully that woman educates herself before making the same mistake to someone who isn't as thoughtful as you. You're absolutely gorgeous btw, just a reminder ❤.
eritosin YES! I freeze because my first thought is to start acting crazy. And I can’t do that so I just freeze lol she did get educated we talked to her after she was sober and had a serious conversation. We felt that’s needed. Thank you so much for that compliment as well 👋🏾👋🏾
@@TheColeLife That's awesome that you guys did that! Not just pointing out the ignorance but doing something about it! I love ya'll already! God bless ❤
@@TheColeLife I'm so glad you educated her while she was so sober. Otherwise, she would have stayed ignorant. Now she consciously can choose how to talk to the next person of color. Thanks for being real and sharing your experience.
@@TheColeLife I know this experience was painful and unsettling. But could you possibly do a follow up video on the conversation you had with her while sober? What you said and her response. Going Ham is not always an option. My most important take away from this is how deeply mortified and hurt your husband looked. That is the epitome of love. Having someone to shoulder your burdens
I literally just came back from Cancun last week and a similar situation happened to me while playing volleyball on the beach, I hit the ball very hard to the other side, and Spanish man said "I have too much anger" and laughed. I did not find the comment amusing at all, I was actually offended and annoyed because I felt like he was alluding to the angry black girl stereotype. It made me really upset and I thought maybe I am overthinking it, but listening to your situation Lexi, makes me feel like I'm not alone as a dark skin woman and these subtle comments are real and hurtful. We are strong and beautiful black women in Christ! Thank you for sharing!
First, Lexi you are absolutely gorgeous! I remember a little girl that use to go to my school (DWOCA aka Fairlane Christian School) that looked just like you with an older brother that was a few years younger than me.
Also, I'm so sorry that people are so ignorant. As a dark skinned woman that grew up in Michigan I can tell you that I use to get those kind of comments often. There are people that are shocked because you're beautiful AND dark skinned. It's crazy! BTW, in other states, particularly the west coast, I've never received negative comments about my skin color. I've noticed that certain parts of the country that are more segregated tend to have these issues more often.
Vonda V. OMG THAT WAS ME!!!! 👋🏾👋🏾👋🏾 I went there!!!
I think you are absolutely right! I truly believe it’s different in different states. My friend from Austin TX says she NEVER had these issues. It’s crazy because as far as history, weren’t we more open to change than the south ?? 🤔🤔
I love that you are who you are. I have been in that situation at my job as a RN. I remember hanging out with my peers who were white one weekend at a club. Someone bumped into one of them and she was drunk at the time. That drunk coworker confronted the person that bumpedinto her and slurringly nominated me to fight for her saying that because I am black, that's how we all handle things. She was so wrong and I left her there. Lol She learned that day that she was very wrong. Seeing how she really felt about me during that situation, I no longer had anything to do with her. As the saying goes, "what's done in the dark will surely come to light."
Another honest conversation. My daughter is often the only black in her professional meetings, training sessions, etc. and faces similar circumstances. She is very wise and Christ-centered and deals with ignorance with great grace, as you did. Blessings and favor upon you both!
You are so beautiful girl and I'm so proud of how you both handled the situation, I've never experienced racism like that and I could not promise that I wouldn't have told that woman off..you guys are strong
Listen! I don’t know who you people are BUT I love you both! I just came across you “How Did We Meet” video and have been catching up on the rest of your videos!! First of all YOU Lex are BEAUTIFUL, but you already know that 😉 and your husband is freakin beautiful as well! You guys are beautiful from the inside out and it’s so refreshing to watch!!! I have never been in an interracial relationship so I don’t understand that journey , but I do understand the black in the workplace struggle far too well. I have to honestly work twice as hard at my job, I see others get away with things I could NEVER...I have far too many stories to share and I have to always carry the load of representing myself well so that (like you said) I represent black women well! It’s not a easy load to carry but being a black woman it is my load to carry. So many people don’t understand the daily struggles of a BLACK WOMAN and it can be lot sometimes, but we continue to push through. I am a new subscriber and I wish you BOTH abundance, love and joy!!!!
You guys are amazing in how you handle everything thrown at you, considering all sides, with contemplation, grace and professionalism.
Much admiration!
P.S. you're gorgeous, Lexi!
The black struggle is real. It’s literally everywhere we go. Imagine if you were the employee actually attending the conference, it gets even more stressful. You did well handling this sis! On another note, you two are too nice to that lady. She is NOTclueless. This was her very subtle- not subtle way of being racist! Epic micro aggression! She should’ve had those conversations with her husband, but she went out of her way to let Lexi know exactly what she was thinking and she kept going at it again and again. That’s not ignorance, that’s racist!
Thank you! It's not your job to educate! Including HR and being technical about it was smart to cover their back. They were wise on that part. However, a few home truths about the woman herself would have served her well. White woman are babied too much. To the point they know they can get away with incidents such as this - and even murder! This reminds me of the Amber Guyger/Botham Jean case. Honestly sometimes I feel when Christians do this whole, "what would Jesus do?" they forget who the hec Jesus was. And most importantly, they forget who the hec God Is! Like they're stuck on John 3:16 and didn't read the rest of the bible (old and new testament). God don't play. And neither did Jesus. He'd pick up a stick and chase the heathens out of the temple! Li-te-ra-lly! Call hypocrisy out to the faces of those causing trouble. Not just educate, but expose! And he never had time for foolishness. The stories you hear of him being forgiving, e.g. Zaccheus, Mary, Peter, where to those who yearned to learn and extended a branch to Jesus. Zaccheus literally climbed a tree just to see and hear him speak. Otherwise, God didn't waste his time with the ignorant who yearned to not learn/change. He was actually very irritated by them. Ananias and Sapphira anyone? (Acts 5: 1-11) When somebody shows you who they are, BELIEVE THEM and show them who you are. You're an apostle of God; NOT of racism. Racism is NOT your God. Honestly, I know this happens often but sometimes drunk or not I feel racist people know who to try. They can tell who the forever forgivers are. Be careful that people do not sense this trait and continuosly test your patience and your faith. I'm not trying to sound militant, but at times you have to be because if your body is to be a temple of God you must guard your body, mind, soul and spirit from principalities and powers. Let those who wish to be better, be blessed.
I love how you said God prepared you by building up your self esteem and confidence so no one can disrupt that...by the same token, it's like trying to reopen a closed wound, but I believe you too have such a strong foundation that can weather these storms and be change agents in your community and in the world. Keep the love on board because it definitely radiates.
YOU ARE GORGEOUS LEXI DON ’T LET THOSE PEOPLE MAKE YOU THINK THAT YOU’RE NOT STAY POSITIVE PEACE AND LOVE
Lexie you guys are experiencing what has been done to us since the beginning. So wonderful that knowing the Lord as Savior is priceless because He gives you peace that passes understanding! Mayo Angelo wrote an awesome uplifting poem about being a black woman ❤
Lexi you did a GOOD thing by not giving her the response that would be used against us. Soo honourable girll. Thanks for being soo strong. 💪🏾❤️❤️❤️🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
That skin tone is poppin lady yaaazzz!!!...you are Dark and Lovely....😇😇🤗..
Great Video!! Great statements! Love yall!!!
You two are very blessed to have one another. It’s absolutely impressive that your husband gets it and supports you emotionally. It’s amazing! This is so important. The two of you are beautiful, I’m sorry people were not classy enough to just be quiet if they didn’t have anything of substance to say to you. Enjoy the weather 👋🏾💜🌹and thanks for sharing 💜
Very intelligent, real and honest conversation. Also, an important conversation to share, as you acknowledge to yourself in your inner thought process, as well as in your "attitude" (when you are exposed to that kind of ignorance) -- that your color is beautiful. After that acknowledgement to yourself, (coupled with ignoring whatever comments, odd looks, jokes, that comes your way) -- Laugh to yourself and know that you must be the superior one in the deepest recesses of their minds -- Otherwise, why would they even expend their energy & time -- to go out of their way -- to deliberately make you feel uncomfortable, if they "truly" felt superior to you.
I am so sorry this has happened to you!! You are gorgeous! All of your shades are beautiful!! I am so glad that you and your husband already know this!!!
You are gorgeous inside and out because I would’ve lost my religion for a good 5 mins but that’s when realization takes over and you realize GOD has it ! Stay Blessed !
i can definitely relate to you. I'm in an interracial marriage and I am in a management position as the only "sista." It is so annoying and difficult to juggle these types of uncomfortable situations. My nature would be to tell her off or knock her out....but we must represent well so that we're not "labeled." I'm glad you all handled the situation. I know you don't need me to tell you this but you are a Beautiful Black Woman inside and out. No one can take that away from you or say anything differently. I love the support and awareness that your husband has in these type of complex racial situations. Love you guys and keep doing what you're doing!!! :)
First Lady Michelle Obama said it best, "when they go low, we go high". Never lower yourself to a conversation as such rise above it and walk away. Sign of maturity on your part, my little sister. Love your channel as a couple. You guys rock!!!
I know you know bc u're very secure in who you are & who's you are, but this is the 3rd video I've watched so it caught me off guard but yet I'm still smiling bc U're so Beautuful & ur smile makes me smile. I so admire & love ur love between u both. You know the crazy thing is i never comment but i know it's all God. Y'all truly are an inspirational couple that wear true pure anointed Agape(Love). Keep shining & smiling Lexi You got ur Boaz & you both Look good 2gether🙏🏽
In one company I worked for, I was told to "get a more stylish haircut to appeal to more clients" 👀😬
Needless to say, I left shortly thereafter
Dedon91, Why should you leave? As long as your hair is well kept. You should have asked the person who told you that to please give that to you in writing. There are some good and crooked 😂 lawyers that would have taken you to the bank with that statement. You must learn to be wise as a serpent and as harmless as a dove.
@@sharonedwards3601 I left for other reasons not related to the hair situation.
You handled the situation pretty well. I've been in these kind of situations alot, and at this point I'm not surprised anymore.
I used to have comments like that when growing up. My mom always reminded me that “black is beautiful” dark and lovely! That’s what my mom said to us. Don’t be bothered u stood out because you are not only black but also beautiful. U stood out because you are different there’s nothing wrong with that. What that lady really wanted to say is but was not humble enough to say it is” how can I be like you? Show me how?
Thank you guys for sharing this story. It's sad how ignorant people can be. Lexi, you're gorgeous!! ❤ you guys!
I have had patients turn down my assistance and ask for the other pharmacist to help them instead.
I have such a hard time understanding how people can maintain these levels of ignorance and seemingly not comprehend how hateful and harmful this is to us. And I say us as in "us", the whole human race. Our differences are so beautiful and enlightening for our spiritual growth.
It hurts my soul that I can't even go to the grocery store with my inter-ethnic son and not catch some ignorant person giving us the side eye 🙄 I don't know everything or understand everything but I have tried to make it a point to educate myself from a young age and come to a point of understanding and realization of the issues we face in this society regarding ethnicities and the melanin content of a person's skin.
I love you guys and respect your willingness to be open with your relationship for all to see. Keep it up!!
Wow! That is really unbelievable for anyone who is grown to say it. I understand your "lack of a response" is really a response that is appropriate for the situation. Been there and reacted the same. You did well. Both of you.
Your inner and outer beauty and strength awes me. Your melanin gives me LIFE queen. You are an amazing role model to so many of us black woman. ✊🏿✊🏽✊🏾😍
I have been shocked to paralysis too many times by the blatant racism of alleged friends, family & even strangers. Your experience is eerily similar to one I encountered on a beach in NC when I was 18 (10 years ago)
A drunk, white woman approached me...stumbling and all. I was so confused because she B-lined across the beach straight to me and I had no idea who she was.
She attempted to tell me a joke through her slurred speech & all I could make out was the end of the joke was something about "Sand N-words"
I was so disgusted and appalled it apparently startled HER (??) and she tried to embrace me & I snatched away from the nut.
I'll never understand it but you and your husband's willingness to address these issues is too refreshing! Love
Yes. She sounds like she was jealous of you and that her husband was looking at you. I'm sad you had to go through that but all you and Brian can do is just pray for them. I mean its even worst worse now since everything that's going on. My hats off to you and Brian for the way you handled it and is handling it. Brian looks like he's about to cry. Come after she knew you wasn't the same girl just proves who and what she is? Love you guys and continue praying that things will get better than they are and was before all this craziness. 🙏🙏🙏😪😪💕💕💕 Thank you for sharing!!!!🌹🌹🌹 I'm glad he was asleep cause you know Brian is protective . God's got you both.
Lexis is by Far a shining Star!! Lexis is truly a Exquisite Beauty!!!! GOD CONTINUE 2 BLESS keep N STRENGTHEN U! 🙏💕💕💕💫💫💫🌼🌼🌼
You should've told her "Yes, I'm very dark which means I won't get wrinkles like you pale women. Gotta love the melanin!" lol
Wow that was racist but your blk so it's OK right???
@@adriannelson9865 it wasn't racist but a fact. Black people don't usually age as fast as white people because of the melanin in our skin.
@@adriannelson9865 ✋ using words incorrectly...look up racism annnnnnd try again... Check your sister not mine...ummmk😘
@Derek Lowe Stop trolling and get a life.
I relate to this so much. Mos def has a song where he says “sitting in the sun getting as black as I want” and that lyric stayed in my heart which was powerful since so much of the narrative for dark skin children is to stay out of the sun
If it happens agains,smile and say "I Thank God for blessing me with this beautiful skin which I appreciate and cherish so much"
Don't let them get to you,your the most beautiful person I've seen..most people who likes to comment about color and such,they are miserable in their own,they have self esteem issues that's why they drag other people to negativity.
Stay blessed and beautiful..love from South Africa
From the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks....& that’s scripture. Although you both were representing each other (Brian, the company & Lexi, her husband) you both are representations of God. Keep shining. ☀️❤️ #LordHelpUsAll
your videos always spark something in me!!! i just love how open and honest the both of you are. THANK YOU! love from South Africa.
Lexi - you are BEAUTIFUL!!! As a dark skin woman, I totally understand. I'm glad we can be comfortable in our skin. Thank you for talking about this issue. As we climb up the corporate later it does not get easier. The organization I work for is trying to address the issues and stereotypes of people. I just accepted a job inside of the organization where I work and I'm the only black woman. I'm a little nervous because not only am I darkskin, but I have natural hair. Sigh...The things we go through as dark skin women.
shaylas78 yessss omg preach. This is our life’s journey but stay Strong God has made our skin soooo glorious, smooth & different, from others and so beautiful. It’s mostly envy! I’m telling you! We are truly blessed and less wrinkles, God bless all us beautiful dsw globally ❤️💓🖤💚 we cope with colorism, racism, and sexism and do it unbothered. We rise above the hate 🙏🏾
@@janayamak7913 Yes! Love conquers hate!
shaylas78 amen!!! Yessss always ❤️❤️❤️
I completely understand your pain and struggle because I'm black and my husband is white in Germany so we always get stares but no comments, but I hate when someone refers to our relationship as "interracial"... What is "interracial"? Are you implying that one of us is not human? Ignorance! You are beautiful love and very strong because I honestly cannot say how I would have responded. Continue to be great and beautiful.
@@shoshanasadeh1266 Amen!
It hurts my heart that you had to endure this type of treatment. I know it happens all day every day to many people, but I applaud you for being transparent and vulnerable about your experiences. Conversations and educating people about the harsh realities we live in today, I believe, is the first step to making a change. Bringing awareness to the topic of race is the only way we can learn and grow. I commend you both for using your platform to discuss these topics. May God bless you both.
You are so beautiful! When people tell me to stay out of the sun because in THEIR own personal opinion I’m the “perfect” color... I can’t help but look at them like their as crazy as they are because I LOVE being black and I LOVE when the sun tans my skin in the summer. Keep being classy and confident you- representing us black women OF ALL COMPLEXIONS so very well
Lexie, that red on you is da bomb! Your skin tone is so beautiful. You look so beautiful.
Dark beautiful gorgeous sis...I love love your complexion... I love our different tones.. Love you guys.. thanks for open honest conversation!
Lexi!! God bless you! Your reaction is goals lol
“When they go low, We go high”
*btw I loove your tan 😍
ThePatmon Show Yes, that’s absolutely right 🙌🏾🙌🏾
👏👏👏...love her tan too. Tell your company no more Cancun, come to the Caribbean instead.
So D'Vine thank yoouuu !! Omg I wish!!
She should've told her to stay out of the sun because white women get wrinkles very easily. Too low? lol
@@ms.bubs4fun506 LMBAO
Lexi you handled it well. You never answer a fool to his folly. Saying nothing sometimes speaks volume.
I really LOVE this video, the message ❤ speceally when she said about God and her confidence
You two are beautiful human beings. I found out I was "black" at 30. I never knew there was a difference. I reject colorism amongst humans. I save it for coloring with crayons. Ignorance is rampant. Stay strong! You are a beautiful woman and your husband a handsome man, two humans who found love in the name of the Divine. Peace & Love.
Hi Lexis. Both my sisters were lighter skin. I grew up feeling ugly. When people say u are dark but u you are beautiful. Why cant they say U BEAUTIFUL PERIOD. These stereotypes are irritating. I know hurt u were. U beautiful Darling. U are fearfully and wonderfully made. Glad you'll are speaking about these things. People are hurting
Been looking at your vlogs and my first comment. As a couple, please don't let what other people think of you both.God put you togather in holy matrimony so let no man put a sounder. Stay strong and concentrate more on your love for each other and the future, stay prayed up at all times, you are both a beautiful couple....bless up to you both..... 🇹🇹❤🙏
I am getting to binge watch your videos to catch up on your story. All the videos have been great and informative. Thanks for the great content.
The political climate has ignorance to a all time high😤 since this was your husbands job trip you handle yourself well. I love your channel because you are truly helping many and getting the conversations flowing. I am not in a interracial relationship but your vid popped up and you both were so honest and cute as hell that I subscribed because you are having honest discussions about what is happening in our country
You really have a nice skin girl don’t pay her attention I want my skin be like yours you’re gorgeous
Lexi you handled it well and I am so proud of you. She was ignorant, irresponsible and rude.. You are a strong beautiful black woman that has grace, positivity, confidence and so much love in you heart. Do not let the enemy destroy you. God is in control and he has you covered. Thank you for sharing and I love you both. 🤗❤🤗❤
You could have and should have taken the time to educate this woman because it is obvious she needed some learning to do. You don’t have to be rude with your direction but just informative. You both are so wonderful love watching you
I really enjoyed this video! I am African American and was raised in the military. That meant I was often one of the few ‘Negroes’ on the base, in school. I was often initially looked at curiously by my classmates, who then asked their questions, and we then moved on with playing. It was the teachers and other adults that seemed surprised that I read so well, or always won the class spelling bees, or aced the math quizzes, and would let me know how pleased they were to see that I was so “exceptional”. I was an adult when my father and I were talking about a particular teacher that gave me a lot of grief that I couldn’t understand. She would often tell me she needed to speak to my parents. This always terrified me, because I thought I was going to get in trouble at home. My dad would go to the school, come back home, and tell me I should be more ladylike when I was sitting (I was a tomboy). It was in that adult conversation, he told me she was a racist and that I was too arrogant (his word) to think anyone would not like me because of the color of my skin; and he was determined to keep it that way. I am forever grateful to him for sparing me THAT burden during my formative years. Teach your children to know themselves through the eyes of God: that they are beautiful and wondrous creations. He’ll give them the wisdom to handle the foolish and ignorant people that they will have the opportunity to bless!
I looked at this video from so many angles however I believed you handled yourself very well and your husband probably would have done with my husband wanted to do if that situation happened. The hardest thing about ignorance and responding or reacting to it is but that person has inner things are deeper things in them that only God can heal. I too am a dark-skinned woman I am an African woman and I love that my parents raised us to love who we are growing up we faced a lot of the name calling actually not from white people at all the mostly from fellow black people so I believe sometimes that's even harder. However with the situation that you went through and realizing and understanding your on a vacation and I love how you acknowledge at even at your age you guys are so wise I love it, I'm not going to react to this woman however I believe your RUclips channel is going to educate people. I am usually the only person of color at a lot of places with living in PA however I believe confidence get you so far in life I welcome questions I do not welcome ignorance however I know that you are very educated confident beautiful woman and you are married to someone who loves you, I mean the person of who you are beyond your shade beyond all those things and I think it's wonderful especially before having kids that you guys are realizing all of these different things.
there is so much more to say however it's easier to say it then write it but I'm very proud of you guys keep up the great work love the channel.
Josephine Young that was so beautifully said thank you so much for your words or wisdom and encouragement. That means a lot. ❤️
You’re a beautiful couple and as long as you have God, you have everything.
Your smart, beautiful and wonderful made! Your chocolate skin is flawless and gorgeous!!!! Your blessed to have a husband that is aware, and understands. Also, that your both socially conscious of the ignorance and how to handle it. Keep being a light, hopefully it will enlighten the minds of many! Thanks for sharing! New subscriber ❤️.
Love how you guys talk about things together
GBU and protect your feelings
What a lovely tan you got on the trip, Lexi! In my head I would have winked and told her, "Yes, and since you're trying to get darker, this is your goal, dear!" I love the beach and I always look forward to getting some bronze on this skin every year! Unfortunatley, I still have to educate even some of my friends on their perceptions because I live in the South. Even my mom hates my natural hair. You can't waste time on living your best life because people are ignorant about the diversity of the world. God loves variety and He deliberately made me to look like this. It's the people we are on the inside that counts and how we treat others like Jesus did. I love good humans, not colors or other uncontrollable outside attributes and I see that in your relationship too and wish you two all the best!
You are beautifully and wonderfully made! You are such an inspiration. Your confidence comes from His definition of beauty!