Why narcissists hold onto items from past relationships

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  • Опубликовано: 9 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 78

  • @nicolebeard6051
    @nicolebeard6051 7 месяцев назад +63

    I am in disgust thinking about my ex husband keeping explicit pictures of me. I know he didn’t delete them. He also had pictures of his ex before me and then gaslit me about it. He’s also a porn addict. I can’t change the decisions I made but all I can do is learn from this and move forward.

    • @NatzTalk
      @NatzTalk 7 месяцев назад +4

      I feel you about the decision aspect, same for myself.😩😭

    • @londonking3588
      @londonking3588 7 месяцев назад +1

      He was your husband though...

    • @nicolebeard6051
      @nicolebeard6051 7 месяцев назад

      @@londonking3588 yes he was.

    • @stellar52
      @stellar52 7 месяцев назад +2

      When I asked my Nex to delete mine, he said that they are HIS memories, so he won't. I had to threaten him to report him to his Organisation which he's a repected member of, for more than half his life. He told me he did it but I suppose he didn't do it immediately. We all know they need to be in control and do everything on their own terms.

    • @nicolebeard6051
      @nicolebeard6051 7 месяцев назад

      @@londonking3588 yes..

  • @kimberlychlarson6688
    @kimberlychlarson6688 7 месяцев назад +13

    When living with the ex I found his trophy closet. He kept his exes letters, pics, motor cycle helmet, study Bible,, a few personal things of mine. He also added his mother's breast prosthetic and ashes. I can't imagine what he kept on his phones or computers.

  • @Forexroadrunner
    @Forexroadrunner 7 месяцев назад +17

    And if they expose those nudes, sue them! Immediately. If they are smart, they will not expose it for you to knows, itll cost em.

  • @stevehartwell1861
    @stevehartwell1861 7 месяцев назад +13

    Keeping objects...makes sense through the lens of the disorder

    • @NatzTalk
      @NatzTalk 7 месяцев назад +7

      Kinda like a serial killer keeps trophies.

  • @TracyMarieBriare
    @TracyMarieBriare 7 месяцев назад +23

    Omg I have the most petty weirdness to share. So according to the narc. He somehow thinks he got his ex girlfriend her birth control when they were together. I don’t know if he thinks it was his idea for her to get on it because I am pretty sure she went to planned parenthood and it was prescribed to her. Anyway in his mind it was his. Anyway apparently the story goes she was busted cheating so he does what every normal person does in a break up and he demands takes and keeps her birth control. She falls pregnant due to going off her birth control and he relished in delight that she “got pregnant and fat and ruined her life” he held on to that old expired nasty rotting birth control up until only recent due to a fire. Understand this was well over 25 + years ago that this even occurred. Red. Fucking. Flag!

    • @NatzTalk
      @NatzTalk 7 месяцев назад +1

      Omfg

  • @manbearpig7950
    @manbearpig7950 7 месяцев назад +2

    Yeah, I learned that, everything she has seems to be a trophy

  • @kiaheat1920
    @kiaheat1920 7 месяцев назад +7

    I had a book that I had given him, but I wanted that book back because I felt like we were living a lie. I am ngl I was fixated on that book because of how much he protected that book. He would hide it from me. After our final break up, I gathered all my stuff and he just so happened to had it peaking out. I ripped it up and he almost had a heart attack. I think he would feed into it. It was almost sick how he would look at it. It was a simple “I love you” book I had specially made for him before I knew about all the foul stuff he was doing. It’s weird how he would gaze at it and brag about it to friends, yet they all knew he was lying and cheating🧐

  • @tanyaw7180
    @tanyaw7180 7 месяцев назад +7

    Both had cameras all over the house but I’ve taken them both to court….if any unauthorized pics/videos pop up online of me while we was living together I will file charges on the both of them…try me! 🙏🏾💪🏾🙅🏽‍♀️😈👨🏾‍🦲🎭🐍👮🏽‍♂️

    • @Liz-wz8dh
      @Liz-wz8dh 6 месяцев назад +1

      Go girl. I suspect my narc was doing stuff like this too. I explicitly told him I do NOT give consent for any pictures of me for anyone to use (although I never do nudes anyway) but just in case. The ensuing "punishment" I got from him told me he had at the very least considered it. These people are such douchbags!

  • @GobboBex
    @GobboBex 7 месяцев назад +5

    Another Red Flag is generally Photographers...or people with voyeuristic behaviour keeping old photos. Just my experience.

  • @nancyappel5645
    @nancyappel5645 7 месяцев назад +5

    I didn't know it at the time when he left he took our daughter's and my birth certificates, daughter's SS card and our marriage certificate. He also took just 2 pictures of me and recordings of my reactive abuse. He didn't take any other pictures of our daughter's. He's so gross

  • @sarahmeagwin
    @sarahmeagwin 7 месяцев назад +7

    My narc ex kept a whole box of Christmas and birthday cards from every ex he’d had. He even bought it with him when he moved interstate to be with me. Some were decades old.
    I got very uncomfortable when he was proudly showing me a card from his 21st birthday from an ex that had an explicit joke in it. Not only should that only have been between them, but this man was 14 years my senior. I didn’t know him then, but I was a child at the point he was given this card. Everything about it seemed so sick and wrong, and he was so giddy reliving it. 🤮

  • @grand_air_trine_astro
    @grand_air_trine_astro 7 месяцев назад +5

    He only has 2 explicit videos of me and oh boy did I regret allowing him to take them 🙈 he threatened to use them against me

    • @Liz-wz8dh
      @Liz-wz8dh 6 месяцев назад

      These narcs love the sense of control.

  • @GobboBex
    @GobboBex 7 месяцев назад +2

    You really are our favourite self aware Narcissist Brother Lee, you help people, you work hard on yourself and help others., you save lives Dude...much respect for and to you always. Love & God bless. I do want to say though before even watching the video...that is the reason they keep your things to practice to become a professional serial killer.....cus they keep trophies . LMAO... Sorry bad joke.

  • @lauriehutchinson9487
    @lauriehutchinson9487 7 месяцев назад +2

    Narcissist remind me of serial killers holding on to their victims things.

  • @julianalemos6375
    @julianalemos6375 7 месяцев назад +1

    Wow that explains a lot, I actually found his trophies galway of pictures and objects

  • @kiarapatton90
    @kiarapatton90 7 месяцев назад +2

    Well I know he still has things I gave him including a galaxy flip phone, clothes and so much more. It’s easier for them to lie about where they got it from. Pictures too! Hidden in the private files. Crazy thing is they make you delete your stuff unless it’s of them.

    • @kiarapatton90
      @kiarapatton90 7 месяцев назад

      This is why i don’t take nudes. You not about to have me all over the internet or in your phones. I felt uncomfortable when he video me doing other things. I also saw a video in his phone of a woman crying while he was asking her questions about stuff he lied about and she told her parents. I felt bad for her it wasn’t cool, I saw her pain and embarrassment.

  • @patsygordon38
    @patsygordon38 7 месяцев назад +1

    Yes, he said yo me when we were breaking up he said after 5 years he didn't have anything to show for the relationship. Omg I wish I knew all this before him 😢

  • @OfeliaBaumgarr
    @OfeliaBaumgarr 7 месяцев назад +2

    Mine won't return my house key. Scary stuff...

  • @kiarapatton90
    @kiarapatton90 7 месяцев назад +1

    Someone said on TikTok that it’s not the ones he’s following you have to worry about it’s the one he has blocked.

  • @Mica-e4p
    @Mica-e4p 7 месяцев назад +2

    I had the opposite problem. My identical twin sister (we're 62) said she would store my belongings when I was sick in the hospital with epilepsy. She then gave everything away, decades of my belongings. I lost my right to drive due to epilepsy.

    • @NatzTalk
      @NatzTalk 7 месяцев назад +2

      I'm so sorry😭💔

    • @Mica-e4p
      @Mica-e4p 7 месяцев назад +1

      @@NatzTalk Thank you for your kind words of support. My identical twin sister also waited 2.5 yrs to tell me that our (abusive) mother had died and that we had been disinherited.
      My abusive twin sister cost me my statutory right to sue our mother's multi-million dollar estate for damages, a very short window here in California. My mother beat me black and blue from the time I was a tot. This resulted in brain injury to me, and caused me to have seizures.

  • @stellar52
    @stellar52 7 месяцев назад +1

    I had to threaten my Ex to delete my pictures or otherwise I'd tell his Feminist Organisation he's a member to. He said they are "HIS memories". He also had a book from his weird affair he's had 13 years ago, the woman gave him a book with a personal text on the first page. It's called "She comes first". LOL. She is 14 years older and had to teach a 27 year old the "cheek clapping" 😂
    We should also remember that it's a thing even Psychopaths do, any disorder that includes Narcissism. Lucy Letby did this, ad well.

  • @StarFire-fk9jr
    @StarFire-fk9jr 7 месяцев назад +2

    His sense of humor, is hilarious. Even tho it be tragic shit 😂

  • @laminage
    @laminage 7 месяцев назад +1

    It makes them feel that they are still important and it's from a past that is so fun and glamorous. Sadly there are folks who aren't narcistic who do the same thing. Mary Wilson of The Supremes (1944-2021) admitted that some folks thought she ended up like her former Partner Florence Ballard (1943-1976), living in a rat trap of an apartment, wearing an old gown and pouring through old photo albums like a rock version of Miss Havisham in Great Expectations. In the Novel Class Reunion by Rona Jaffe (RIP), there was a character named Emily Applebaum Buchman who did the same thing. She graduated from Radcliffe (Harvard's Sister School), in 1957 and by 1963 she had two children but I think she may have had Post Partum Depression. She looked at photos and mementos from the past because it made her feel important and she counted. In the present, her life wasn't all that great. When she went to her Class Reunion she got the Lightbulb Moment, she wanted it but she was too scared to "do" it. She did come around but it took 25 Years to achieve something in life.

  • @Kelli-vn1be
    @Kelli-vn1be 7 месяцев назад +2

    Rubbing their pictures is insane!! 😭🤣🤣🤣 I am so weak.

  • @MrTeddyBoy89
    @MrTeddyBoy89 7 месяцев назад +3

    Lee, this is sick! I don’t if I can take these videos anymore 🤣🤣🤣

  • @bikergirl420.
    @bikergirl420. 7 месяцев назад +1

    I told someone who definitely displayed npd to keep the couple of items I couldn’t take at that time. I knew they wouldn’t return later & wasn’t going to give the satisfaction of asking for them 😂

  • @user-gp8sm3cp4q
    @user-gp8sm3cp4q 7 месяцев назад +3

    Someone I was talking to literally had a picture of his ex face on his wall still hanging up smh

  • @Sherl454
    @Sherl454 2 месяца назад

    Like, Keep Sake'

  • @sjs3590
    @sjs3590 7 месяцев назад +1

    My ex went on a business trip with a female coworker. He brought back the beer glass from their dinner together. I wanted to puke. I feel sure they had something going on.

  • @emmajackson5139
    @emmajackson5139 7 месяцев назад

    I like tripods that cracked me right up 🤣🤣🤣

  • @mariaarmas9938
    @mariaarmas9938 7 месяцев назад +2

    You’re so funny 😂you got me laughing so hard 😂lol

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 7 месяцев назад

    Lol my husband says my pictures are precious 😂 like really 😂😂

  • @themonicameza
    @themonicameza 7 месяцев назад

    I sold two dolls that he bought me to let him go, but now I feel bad and sad.

  • @diandreabrown8711
    @diandreabrown8711 6 месяцев назад

    My narc ex keeps everything... and even some things that she bought for me. Because it showed her new supply, the level i was, she kept it to keep in her hidden closet..
    It is what it is.

  • @boonie3
    @boonie3 7 месяцев назад

    That explains a lot. I was wondering why my nex has barely said a word to me since discarding me, but still carries a bag I gave her and still wears some jewellry I gave her even though all those items weren't exactly super expensive or designer.

  • @biggerminds523
    @biggerminds523 7 месяцев назад +1

    She took all my clothes, dog and art i paint. And my paintings are worth much money.

  • @moniquetammenga3468
    @moniquetammenga3468 7 месяцев назад

    Lee! My third narcissistic ex had a entertainment company. He and his partner posted video’s on You Tube. There band is called WHENEVER. They live in Belgium. I have watched a few video’s from them a few months ago. 😌

  • @nicholecornes1915
    @nicholecornes1915 7 месяцев назад

    Omg he has my pictures and other things ....

  • @tiffanygriffin8647
    @tiffanygriffin8647 7 месяцев назад +1

    Haha how bout my eyeglasses that he would never be able to use considering he could never see anything clearly from my prescription!? 😂 wtf I can’t even wrap my mind around that weird shit Lol

  • @sharonstevenson1729
    @sharonstevenson1729 6 месяцев назад

    Omg he has nude pictures and videos of me. He’s made jokes telling me that he has these photos in his phone. He even keep one of my favourite underwear. He’s has a box of my clothes and shoes I left at his house. I’ve been trying to get back from him for over 4 years. He keeps making excuses for not giving me my stuff

  • @kimgordon3695
    @kimgordon3695 7 месяцев назад +2

    Dey' Jes SICK

  • @Lovelyaribb
    @Lovelyaribb 6 месяцев назад

    My ex did this

  • @1Gibson
    @1Gibson 7 месяцев назад +1

    God only knows what of mine he took to his new marriage.... i know for sure he took a family photo with him covered by his daughters photo..

  • @trj555
    @trj555 7 месяцев назад +1

    The sex tapes and nudes, yes they keep those trophies. But what about more sentiment gifts? From trips or travels or items that were seemingly thoughtful and genuine at the time. Trinkets and items like that. Still creepy or not as much?

  • @NatzTalk
    @NatzTalk 7 месяцев назад

    7:34 😂😂😂😂 dead af

  • @rebekahjette6304
    @rebekahjette6304 7 месяцев назад +1

    😂🤣🤣 dream weaver⚠️

  • @IsabellaPiesch
    @IsabellaPiesch 7 месяцев назад

    I destroyed those trophies but I was very angry - I really regret it now because that wasn´t my right I know. Yeah they keep trophies (pictures, videos - and no I didn´t delete it because those people want that you delete those shit immediatley - I didn´t but what I saw was disturbing... Two sick people on a bicylce - sorry but I never saw such stuff on TV). Like serial killers - they also keep trophies of people they kill... (Horrific in fact). I beg you delete me (no was just a joke).

  • @michellekeller2544
    @michellekeller2544 7 месяцев назад

    That's why my face was not in the nudes, body only.

  • @jacquelinebrown1305
    @jacquelinebrown1305 7 месяцев назад

    lol lee

  • @Liz-wz8dh
    @Liz-wz8dh 6 месяцев назад

    I feel like a lot of narcissistic males hold onto nudes. You have to be very specific about the fact that you do NOT give any kind of permission for them to keep them.