THE VITAMENS - Self-Titled

Backpedal, backpedal, backpedal.
Alright, I think it’s best for me to preface all of this with one crystal-clear proclamation: There's some thing's I've said that I’m not exactly proud of. Er, a lot of things, actually, especially when it comes to this whole Jimmy-deal. You wouldn’t believe some of the inaccurate, insensitive, inane, in-fucking-stupid shit that has come out of my mouth ever since I decided that pretending to be a punk would be a good idea. The majority of you likely don’t see the scope of my idiocy since I’ve already gone back and retconned a lot of the dumb shit I’ve said, but there’s one statement I’ve made that I’ll never, EVER be able to go back on, no matter how much I may want t, because of how much I've already committed to the idea, is this: “Warm Bodies is the best punk band coming out of Kansas City, period.”
No disrespect at all to Warm Bodies; much love, each and every one of you are absolutely fantastic at what you do, I highly doubt that anyone would ever question that. I’ve been adamant about you guys for a while now, even going as far to threaten people over the internet with physical violence if they thought otherwise. [Editor’s Note: You’d fuck Jimmy up, no problem.] But having first heard The Vitamens a little over a week ago, shit, I’m kinda conflicted here. They're. So. Damn. Good. These two bands are surfacing from the same poop-smear that is Kansas City, Missouri, so subjectively, that title is under dispute. Who do I think is the better band of the two? In dunno; my opinion doesn’t mean shit, learn to think for yourself, asswipe. All I know is that The Vitamens are absolutely stunning, and they’re one of, if not THE best band to come out of KCMO in the recent past: I may be ashamed of the majority of words that have come out of my mouth within this past year, but these’re definitely ones that I can say with the utmost confidence. The Vitamens are almost unbelievable.
This group has been active for what I’m assuming to be a few months now, though I’m not able to confirm that. When I asked their drummer, Claudia, for any words that the band may have to say about themselves, I was responded to with a single screenshot of a group conversation of their's, with these quotes being taken word-for-word from the image:
David (Guitar) - “Make sure he knows I skate board”
McKayla (Vocals) - “Poppers”
Barrett (Bass) - “i am tall”
Thanks for that guys, much appreciated. Because if there’s three things that come to mind when I listen to The Vitamens, it’s skateboards, poppers, and tall people. The group also has another guitarist, Dakota, though there wasn’t an insightful comment of his shown in the screenshot, so I can’t comment on it. Who knows, maybe Dakota would’ve said that their favorite movie is “Freddy Got Fingered” or something; information like that could’ve proved to be crucial to the foundation of this entire write-up.
But look, it doesn’t matter, because this demo of theirs that dropped earlier this month is positively phenomenal; no lack of “Freddy Got Fingered” comments could ever detract from that. The group’s members, namely David, Dakota, and Barrett, have played in numerous other Kansas City-based bands of the past and present, including Beta Boys, The Deacons, Dirty Work, Nuke Cult, Nubiles, Cryogenics, and a handful more. Their extensive experience truly shines here in The Vitamens, making for what I believe to be one of their most impressive endeavors to date. The group’s sounds adhere to a perfectly-dated flavor of rock ‘n’ roll, almost like a concentrated dosage of proto-punk injected straight into your jugular. This atmosphere is reinforced by the demo's warm, murky intonation, genuinely sounding as if it was emanating from a different era entirely. Had you guys not known any better, you likely would’ve assumed that The Vitamens WAS pulled right out of some garage in the late 70's.
[Last paragraph of write-up is in the comments.]
TRACK LIST:
Common Krait - 0:00
Roach Motel - 1:49
Hysteria - 4:00
R&R - 5:14
DOWNLOAD: thevitamens.bandcamp.com/rele...

[@jimmythedog.]

[cont.]
My tired lexicon can only begin to describe The Vitamen's splendor. After just getting the slightest taste of the demo's opening track, "Common Krait", which is brought to fruition by an elongated note from the group's vocalist, who's completely submerged in a body reverb that consistently emits downright-chilling echoes, all while initially simplistic, rudimentary riffs accompany it. From then on, the group exhibits their sheer talent wonderfully, I didn't truly see the extent of it until the first chorus of "Common Krait" kicked in. The rhythms found there are nothing short of captivating; it’s rare for me to be that moved by a piece of music, especially from a group of people who've generally involved themselves in hardcore projects prior to forming The Vitamens. I mostly credit this captivation to the group's vocalist: she has a beautiful singing voice that's further accentuated by its discernible delay, which often gives the illusion of vocal harmonies when there are none. In this four-track demo, the memorable hooks and melodies are plentiful and won’t be leaving my head anytime soon, especially with the alluring vocal trills that are displayed in “R&R”. Though you shouldn’t misinterpret my sole fixation on the vocalist as an indication of the music’s shortcomings, because everyone else involved does a fantastic job in their respective roles. Both the guitarist’s and bassist’s chords are an absolute delight to listen to, especially with the supplementary chromatic notes brought forth by the rhythm guitarist which adds to the overall dreaminess of this band’s music, while all being teamed up by the low-to-mid tempo drum beats that are perfectly suited for the music at hand. The Vitamens are such a refreshing take on a subgenre who’s “amatuerish” approach is often misused as an excuse to produce a hackneyed retro-rehash. Not once does the music seem trite or stale, not at all. I instead find myself to be completely lost in it; The Vitamens are stunning, I can’t find another word to better describe how talented they all are, how easily they leave an impression on you, how they completely ensnare your attention from start to finish, demanding repeated back-to-back listens: just stunning.
Now, are they “best punk band of KCMO” material? Maybe. Probably. Most likely. Don’t wait for me to tell you what to think though, because The Vitamens are great no matter where they stand in the hierarchy. Now let’s hope that I don’t hurt nobody’s feelin’ by picking favorites here.

[@MetaphysicalPlayroom]

Are you from kcmo? I recently moved to springfield mo from Austin but all my friends live in KC 🤠

[@deadbabiesinvomit]

Amyl and the Sniffers remind me of these guys.

[@ME-dk2ze]

Thanks, Jimmy xo

[@4206669eatit]

Dis my bff band and i love it almost as much as i love her which is a big deal cause she the love of my life!

[@jeanwerst2688]

Another bafflingly under appreciated gem. If you dig this, check out cb radio gorgeous

[@jimmyforeskin5659]

I'm from the shit smear of KC misery. I think the Natural Man Band is pretty awesome. Warm Bodies as well and the vitamens are definitely rock n and a Rollin' as well. It's great that all bad ass music is coming out rn.

[@Punketeria1369]

So, sooo good!!!
chEErs,
93

[@MetaphysicalPlayroom]

93 skidoo

[@jmgmarcus808]

Good stuff here. Great vibe. Sounds like early Misfits and X had a baby.

[@deadbabiesinvomit]

U should check out Amyl and the Sniffers. They aint as hardcore as these guys. But they still rock. And Amyl is a cutey

[@mortwasabi9643]

my dudes

[@Toastedscallops]

Yass

[@rickweber7734]

sleep on my floor, and pet my kitty, I'll tour you thru central Ohio, and feed you spaghetti..love, ricky

[@nemcx8690]

❤❤❤