Feminism: From Equity to Psychopathy
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- Опубликовано: 6 сен 2024
- The three solutions to the Gender Wars offered by third and fourth wave feminism are:
Standardization: women should retain traditional gender role, one standard should apply to all
Emasculation: men should become more feminine even as women become more masculine (stalled revolution)
Masculinization: women should emulate men and outman them (raunch culture, slut walks).
Consequence:
Marriage, cohabitation, childbirth rates, and even sex fell off a cliff. About one third of women and men are lifelong singles. Another third are involved in ephemeral pseudo-relationships, including dead marriages. 40% are raised in single parent poverty-stricken households, most of them headed by women.
Men and women walked away.
How did we get here?
Until 17th century enlightenment, men and women shared work and home alike. Muscles provided men with an advantage, so patriarchy was formed.
French revolution and revolutions of 1848 emancipated women for a while and rendered them revolutionaries: they entered the public sphere
As the home was hollowed out, its functions outsourced, work and home became two distinct spheres.
Work for men was Darwinian jungle and survival of the fittest. Home was the sanctuary. Women's role was to comfort men and socialize boys and girls with traditional gender roles.
Women extended this domesticity to the public sphere, adopting social causes and entering caring professions, like nursing and teaching which used to be male enclaves.
The two world wars pushed women even further into male roles.
The first two waves of feminism were concerned with equity and equality: the franchise; property ownership; access to education, healthcare and the workplace; equal wages; anti-porn and anti-prostitution.
The third wave was about empowerment: women should do whatever made them feel empowered even if it meant conforming to male chauvinistic stereotypes, sex work, and self-objectification via sex and porn, including self-porn and group sex.
Problem is: women want to have the cake and eat it. They want to lead an emancipated, career-centred, and promiscuous lifestyle followed by a reversion to traditional gender roles.
But traditional gender roles depends crucially on purity, especially sexual purity - and on dedication to the domestic sphere. Women gave up the first and, having spent decades as singles, they lack the skillset for domestic, committed, long-term intimacy. Dating is extinct replaced with rare and disappointing hookups, replete with bad sex for women (the orgasm gap).
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Somehow we have turned relationships and even normal contact into risky propositions. The juice is not worth the squeeze for the most part anymore. A lot of people without identifying as MGTOW, red pill etc are simply deciding not to play the game. If you go to underdeveloped countries prior to the internet that magic you speak of was still there. I felt it. It was beautiful. But now even those countries have been globalized in a sense. Social media corrupting everyone. It will be hard to find that anywhere now
@@SP-qi8ur risky as far as laws. Marriage laws, courts favoring women and how easily one can fall when accused of misconduct, despite accusations being dubious at best. The country was Cuba in the 90’s and early 2000’s. No cell phones or internet. Life was always atleast 50 years behind there. Now it’s still behind but the internet keeps everyone globalized. Everyone staring at a phone. Youth are the ones who are the most corrupted by these things
I’ve heard Columbia and Eastern Europe have very traditional women still, but you still gotta have your shit together. Heard Venezuela is the same but good luck getting there.
@@SP-qi8ur Sounds like you know a lot more than you let on. I’ve never been to any of those places especially COLOMBIA 🇨🇴. But hey you corrected my misspelling so the world 🌎 is set right again. 🏆🥇
@@SP-qi8ur I didn’t ask you anything. I made a statement about what I heard. Plus putting a U where a O should be, isn’t something that needs to be corrected like that. Apparently I didn’t take the time to spell check it.
Kinda curious why you think I would assume your being deceptive or hiding something. Honestly now I kinda think you might be, but really I don’t care.
Have a good night Sir
I wish you would write a book about this Professor Vaknin. I don’t see anyone else out there with the peer reviewed facts let alone the courage to examine this subject.
Excellent analysis professor. Most never consider the interest of maintaining a gender divide in regards to capitalism and consumerism.
Additionally, the state also encourages women to work and earn primarily to increase the tax base of the nation.
The last few minutes of this video are incredible. You always find a way to end with such big truth bombs. Thank you for your very thoughtful analysis of this world and culture we live in today, professor
Liked that you pointed this out, indeed, the analysis was incredible. Very interesting video but what it built up to was brilliant and spot-on.
Growing up in rural NZ in 60’s -70’s both my parents ( & my siblings & I contributed) did equal amount of outdoor work but females required to do all housework & food prep
You should def do some more videos about this
Search the contemporary sexuality playlist.
We love you! I’m so glad that you’re contributing to the world through the lectures that we need at this moment!
Married once, 2 relationships after with mature women (50+) now celibate living only with my dogs, as was said before "the juice is not worth the squeeze"
Most women I encounter these days are Narcissists.
I can say as a man in and out of relationships and marriage that these are the most horrible women today possibly in the history of the world. Most men today that are still in a marriage or a relationship with a women are going to suffer in many ways in the hands of the modern women.
I couldn't agree more!! They aren't worth talking to anymore let alone wasting time or money.
Good stay the hell away from women
Perhaps the women willing to date you are horrible, yes. this is likely because the good women are with the good men (not you). The sample of women you've interacted with doesn't reflect all women, most likely just the ones with low standards for both themselves and for their dates, which is why they're willing to engage with you.
He is so right.
Wow you made me notice something about social media , yes we now big on consuming goods
Good morning my dear prof! A big hello from Hollywood city 🤩
Men and women are complements of one another. I agree partially with your conjecture that we do not know intimacy at all anymore. but as a feminine woman who has not had a mate in 4 years, it is heartbreaking. Not downplaying feminism , but yes it has gone too far. We asked for equal rights in the 70’s in the U.S. but It was denied. The basic tenets were not to deny men their masculinity,but to know and understand that we are physically and emotionally different. And of course there were the income differences between the sexes. Sure it was different in the 60’s and 70’s --more real intimacy , but also some casual affairs. What we need to understand is we also want, need, and depend on our mates. Intimacy is an honest connection with a person that loves you and has your back no matter what.
Exactly, work together, not against each other.
Level playing field. Yes, equal rights, but not equal responsibilities. Let's not forget that. Women, and I can't blame them, wanted all the 'good' stuff that men 'had' but none of the bad. It is the same today.
Huge issue - is also feminism has made clear that those children - are not shared... so he understands he is disposable - so he has no reason to invest.
Also - one of the issues with sex - is a profound lack of understanding with regards to orgasm and ejaculation in men. Profound pleasure for both requires a bond and real interest in other. Hook-ups exclude that bond.
Capitalism - does not require the consumer culture really. We as a culture have pushed it there, as capitalism is about profit by serving need - of course more need - allows more profit - but consumerism could be cut back and our consumer culture cut back - and capitalism would just change to adapt. Our government and its massive need for taxes, especially with the demographic issue coming- well....
Its really tricky regarding the first statement.
First of all who builds a relationship with thought that if we not gona work,i will take the children?
Secondly,it is all about dynamic balance and your own inner mental space.
I personally struggled to make a decision and seperate,but once you are faced with clear abuse towards children and cheating,there is not much to think about.
There are so many family men who are hard working and loyal,but then there are thous fathers who possibly struggle with some sort of personality disorders and are not healthy to be around.
Do i want my ex husband to also care for his children?
100% yes I do!
Is it realistic expectation?
As long as children serve his agenda or act as idiolised objects,he will provide.
@@mezazis83
We need to understand one of the causes of the rise of the pick-up culture, and the large number of those who dropped out entirely - is caused by their view of relationships prior to even meeting the person. It is not just about "who builds a relationship thinking" but who chooses to not bother considering one at all.
We also need to appreciate that it is the person subject to the risk who is most conscious of it. It is like a weapon, if I am absolutely positive I would never use it except in self-defense, I can feel certain that I present no risk to others. Others seeing me with it, who only have my word, have cause to be nervous. The risk here- affects men, before they even engage - or rahter in many instances don't.
One of the critical points around dating that was missed for so long is approach, hard to discern by those being approached, because the hook-up types have hugely increased their approaches. While the bulk of men have reduced and increasingly dropped out entirely. I would suggest the dominance of pick-up culture is much more because of men's approach, than women's - or rather because of the approach of most men - still approaching. Those who would have been seeking relationships seriously are the first and most affected - by this risk, those who were only looking for a hook-up do not see themselves subject to the risk
Point 2 is so valid! Yet men would just go a side chick for quick pleasure, instead of making the least effort of communicating! They just expect us to know and guess it in the stars! There was and is a lot on women shoulders, and then we started being more masculine, just easier and you can now hear women say: it is how we work, how we are being build if you ask them for accountability in some areas of life! The same was used for men for a long time, to get away with things…Obviously this does not help women, or men, it is very toxic and it is totally the wrong move…but looks to me like nobody wants to look at what lead here!
@@blacksea1726 I would ask, who has been more open, really about things. Consider "The Rules" as a near norm of dating for a generation. What is not calling him back- etc, but emotional manipulation and non-communication?
@@MNEWALL1 not calling back is manipulation! But consider these norms! Women were expected to be virgins when they marry, whereas men would be encouraged or at least praised for multiple sexual adventures before marriage! Said women would obviously would not have much understanding about how men work, etc…yet, men would just resume to have sexual intercourse would them for reproductions, most of being unsatisfied and looking for such satisfaction elsewhere…Now, women throw that away and they are not virgins anymore…but they are seen as whorish…and not wanted for family, and as mentioned in the above video: They dare to have the cake and eat it too…! How dare they? I still can’t blame only one or others…but looks to me that as a woman, you are dammed if you do and dammed if you don’t! Very few of women like multiple partners, but staying virgin for the one..brought a lot if misery…and unbalance!!
Your speech are just life saving
...there is a brief moment of light while you describe something special was going on between a man and a woman during 1970's, which reminds me to read Amor and Psyche by Erich Neumann again, if we believe it was possible in the myth and past time.
So true! Thank you very much. I've been a feminist for a few years. But, fortunately, I was able to look at the world and society with a sober look that completely coincides with yours
@@MrBobDobolina and I don’t want to
Professor Vaknin, thank you.
no wonder my existence feels like a rebellion. I refuse to give into capitalism's hype on how it's decided to monetize individuals. I didn't think you where going to circle around to that. different as we may see things I'm coming to understand I completely agree. I'll keep putting the effort into people and being selective for people aware of these dynamics and trying to live, embody and represent a purposeful response to the world they're finding themselves in.
Finally, the truth about feminism 🙌 Thanks Sam.
Bravo - love this great summary. I also believe that if you want to solve the climate crisis, we have to reduce the loneliness issue. To connect people to get happier and so they do not fill the void with stuff. We urgently have to reduce our consumption of natural resources. We use 1.6 time more on earth that nature can reproduce. Would love to take your findings on my climate website.
Interesting proposal. Other-self is all you need. From both perspectives.
I grew up with my father's approach to his 3 daughters and 2 sons: if you have 2 hands and 2 feet that work, so do you. My mother was more towards the feminine side and wanted me to be inside cleaning more.
I love to cook, I love to be outside. I love to create with my hands. I'd love to have power tools and cooking gadgets.
I will live to be me.
My life is far from perfect but I believe if we understand that people have their benefits. No gender intended. Just who has the best ideas, who can do what, not intended for a gender role. Just who makes more sense, who has the strength, mentally and physically.
My parents were born in 1927 and my father was from a farming heritage and my mother was from a city heritage heritage.
thank you so much for speaking up about these issues. What do you think about transpersonal psychotherapy and its innate ability to bypass cultural agendas ?
Wigtown is my town because there is a hair growth problem
yea man !
So what to do????? How raise the child???? Plz record sth like that - in points - 1,2,3..... from the beginning for newborns
Did you chose the thumb nail from ‚girl with a gun‘?!
Love love love the title!!
So true
Wow!
You forgot to mention women being forced to work to support alazy infantile husband, and their children ( not to mention 90% of the housework).
I am going to throw it out there and ready for the backlash! All the men complaining about women taking over in the workplaces!! Really? We are not taking over, we share once again the working life! Women used to work next to men in the fields, doing all kind of jobs, they were ploughing the fields, planting crops ( even single women or widowed) and yet no man complained at that time that women were taking over! The working environment moved from the fields into offices now, with benefits, etc…but men think these are not for women! And women that are having this jobs are not traditional or are not feminine! The truth is that these men that think that, are weak and they want control, and they can’t stand a partner with options! They want the options to be only for them…!! I work in an office, men are still promoted way easier than women, some of them are absolute lazy asses…they perfected their confident talk and looks and I can work 10 x more than them, to be barely considered for a promotion or raise! There is a lot of toxic femininity around, no doubt! But boy…men need to try to stop moaning and try to evolve a bit! Women want to have the cake and it! Yep, sad situation! Destructive! But this is what men did for a long time, and they brainwashed the women to also accept it! And it was just as destructive! But we are just going to judge the women, not the men!
Exactly, women aren't taking over men's roles, they're simply participating in the world in ways that men previously managed to prevent, through outright oppression - banning women from having jobs, bank accounts, owning property. To claim otherwise is like saying African American slaves invaded thewhite people's realm of non-slavery, as though slavery was natural rather than oppression inflicted upon them. How absurd. Also, perhaps consider that the definition of what is 'masculine' is from cultural norms created by men in patriarchal societies, so if equates masculinity with superiority which is also incorrect. Yet people cling to those stereotypes. Especially weak men, who are accustomed to feeling superior by virtue of simply being born male, since women have been kept down and oppressed. This is why these men get so emotional and whiny about women now participating in the world as actual people, not servants who exist to cater to mediocre men. So, these useless men can die mad 😂
Also, wow - the comments here have big incel energy hahaha
Well in the space of 15 years I do not recognise the dynamic between men and women in society now. The society is more psychopathic and aggresive. Mental illness is up broken relationahips are up. We are dumping our children at a nursery with strangers so we can all go out to work for a corporation that doesnt care about you or your life or well being. Sams right we have hollowed out the home of strong relationships. I had a long term relationship and when that ended I entered the dating scene or the single life, I didnt recognise what was going on.
@@philporter3045 well, that has nothing to do with women working! The society is changing with the constant access to content and information ( people are frustrated, inpatient, consumerist…and so on…and in all areas of life)
why couldn't this trend be identified earlier?
are the media and other sources possibly inflating the numbers, purposly misguiding, etc?
Both sexes need to be more respectful to one another and also would be great if they did the same towards other sentient beings. start there ...
That's a platitude and minimises the problem by x100... don't start there
@@leonorsuescun3715 No sue, it doesn't. it's meaningless. the structures in place, societal conditions, social movements and the current culture, amongst a bunch of other shit is what dictates and decides the current manifestation of the relationship between man and woman.
Not "people should be nice to each other" rhetoric. I appreciate the sentiment, but i abhor the utility in it. It borders anti-intellectualism.
Hope this doesn't sound too personal, just speaking from the heart. Hope you have a good night.
@@coimbralaw hey coimbre you should respect me. No more to say on this
Wow.... like Children of Men
Life long single here.
none of these solutions are going to work, too many men going there own way these days and won't play the game. You say that women are overtaking the men in the workplace which is generally true with the exception of skilled tradesman in construction, manufacturing and infrastructure. Whilst women may still exist in the management of these occupations, its very rare to find a woman who is competent to carry out this sort of work due to lack of practical skills and probably the enthusiasm to go into those roles.
Concerning infrastructure (electricity, gas, water supply), and to some extent construction, if men doing these jobs decide they've had enough of the west and leave the whole system collapses and returns to the dark ages. Worth mentioning that a lot young men going into these jobs at the moment may be looked down upon by there female peers who have degrees and are entering better paid jobs in the professions, retail, service and management. Most of these jobs not actually essential to society but never the less generally better paid and often more secure with all sorts of perks like working from home. Less men are going to uni now, not seeing it as an attractive prospect.
These examples for "fight back" are partial religious, simple, phantasy driven to a big part, and religious women are very active in some cases. "World order" ideologies ...
Yes, who wants to be in a borderline narcissistic, 'Firm' like relation under framing to philosophical + fact, science questions.
And interesting, how ideologies impact on the orientations, the habits, the trigger...
So education sytem, the workspace domesticating as little heroes and other fallen ones, is maybe much more dominant and no wonder... And no wonder, when understanding learning, (self) critical consciousness, the essence of the funny, paranoid ranking blame game has fallen out of the social learning in this world. But, it is fixable...
Or healing people from the smog in the air.
Does the ease of available porn have anything to do with any of this?
Sex is a protected characteristic under the human rights act, gender isn't.
A decadent society
@FreshFitMiami should invite you on their podcast
Having an enlightened (feminine) husband turned me into an alpha male and I did not like it. Feminized men can be violent with people smaller than them, (children) while manipulating pity from outsiders. Attending to feelings post divorce rendered him incapable (unwilling) to support his children.
Need a conservative women
what are your thoughts on andrea dworkin @samvaknin