I hope you will be a Christian one day, too. God bless! John 3:16-17 NIV 16 For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.
Zack, the simple message of the Christian that the world, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, and all the other religions very sadly miss is an atonement for their sins so that they can be forgiven and stand in the presence of a holy God, who alone is God. God desires that His creation would repent and trust in His only Son Jesus who died for the sins of the world. If you want to read about this, open the books of John and 1st John in the New Testament portions of the Christian Bible. The Christian Bible has been breathed out of God's mouth and given for the people in the world to read, that is anyone who would choose to seek the Lord to know Him(Acts 17). I will pray that you will come to Jesus and see all your chains of sin broken, peace restored, and a new life given in the name that is higher than all names, the name of Isa Masih our Lord. 🙏
I think it depends on what you think you can handle. If you believe you can kiss your partner without it going to far then by all means go ahead if you really want to but be prepared to want more.
I honestly didn't even know this was such a big issue until I stumbled across this video. Personally, I am following God's direction for who I will date and consequently marry, and have pretty strict personal boundaries in place. For me personally, I see nothing wrong with kissing, cuddling, hugging, or holding hands, as long as it doesn't go farther than that. Just my opinion.
If you're following God'd direction for who you date and marry, then you can as well welcome what He says in his word about holiness. If Jesus says if you look at a woman and desire her, you have committed adultery, how much more kissing? cuddling?
U GOT NO MAYO exactly! I had the same mindset, " a little kiss is nothing" but it most likely will lead to more and I only learned that from experiencing it. It's better to have solid boundaries to help with temptation and prevent escalation
I think kissing without lusting or rubbing the partner in away that's lustful is wrong I believe holding hands is fine and hugging is fine but making out and cuddling wrong is pretty lustful
Kissing is okay but leave room for the holy spirit! Hand holding and hugging is alright too. Balance is key. You don't want to starve yourself from ANY physical contact whatsoever because that's not healthy for your relationship. Just keep it respectful and God-honoring. (I have no experience whatsoever in this area lol so this is just my somewhat uninformed opinion.) :P
@@jeanpaulgartier3404 Wow, with what right do you tell her to shut up? She has her complete freedom and right to state whatever she believes in. Do you like it if another person told you to shut up only because you stated what you believe in?
My two cents: Kissing may spur certain "emotions" and lead to temptation. As Christians, we are not told to be strong and withstand temptation, we are called to be smart and flee from it. With that said, I think physical touch may give the devil an opportunity to tempt us into something that is no longer innocent. Think of it like alcohol; drinking is not a sin, but drunkenness is. Say you drink thinking it isn't a sin anyway, then you miscalculate your capacity and end up intoxicated. Sin. I would walk the edge knowing I wouldn't fall; but unfortunately one cannot know if he would fall.
@@TheBiopoem yes but the problem is not whether it leads to sex or not. The problem is that kissing is sexual. Not if you kiss your mother or someone in that way but in the way you would if you are attracted to someone.
@@TheBiopoem just lustful thought is a sin it is stated in the bible that it starts with the eyes which means that the thought even though there may not be actions to back it up is still not ok so it is better to not tempt faith
Man, I'm seeing a lot of comments saying, rather confidently, that "I won't kiss until marriage" or "I believe in complete abstinence". You guys are so strong and I admire that and I ask for your prayers because I am currently in a relationship where that is what he believes but I'm not sure if I agree. I really want to hold his hand, ya feel? I just don't know what to do. I should pray about it some more, I suppose
Anna it will be Good if there is no kiss before marriage because if u kiss u didn't have any assurance u didn't go further.But Pray and discussion about word of God makes u stay clean and make it in ur marriage is Good.
Ephesians 6:10 Christian Standard Bible (CSB) Christian Warfare 10 Finally, be strengthened by the Lord and by his vast strength. Pray for God's strength, He will give it.
You never have to let the devil have a foothold in your relationship. The person I’m seeing is really special to me so I don’t let it go too far because I knew if it did it may cause a lot of pain and I’ve been through enough of that to know that I don’t ever want to go through that.
I personally believe that God is not against kissing before marriage. It's away of showing compassion and love for another. But if we ourselves can't control our desires and are tempted easy then we should stay away from that. So I agree with you, and you did a great job on this!
@@grammyslim5766 Song of Songs 7:7-10 New International Version (NIV) 7 Your stature is like that of the palm, and your breasts like clusters of fruit. 8 I said, “I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit.” May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine, the fragrance of your breath like apples, 9 and your mouth like the best wine. She May the wine go straight to my beloved, flowing gently over lips and teeth.[a] 10 I belong to my beloved, and his desire is for me. Refer to Song of Songs. A story that BELONGED to Solomon. In the story the woman was not talking about Solomon but trying to flee from him. She was talking about her beloved. Solomon TOOK her as his wife and she was not only tempted by the king but longed for and described the intimacy with her beloved, Shepard boy. If you read the Song of Songs literally its about a king taking a woman who was betrothed. She speaks of kissing her beloved and more. And no Solomon is not anyones ideal for marriage. The bible teaches of his success and sin. He had nearly 700 wives and concubines, was seduced by the idols of his wives, and thought he could have it all. Even having a faithful women betrothed to her beloved. How many woman can deny a king while being intimate with her beloved of with she wants to marry at the end of book. www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Song+of+Songs+7%3A7-10&version=NIV "The Most Bewildering Book of The Bible" ruclips.net/video/Cd6fafGL2es/видео.html
That conversation about boundaries is so important, because expectations kill relationships. The best book I've read on this topic and many others is one called "True Love Dates" by Debra Fileta. It's the most biblically mature and balanced perspective I've heard yet - I've read a quite a bit now. She is a professional counselor and often writes for Relevant Magazine as well.
yes, that was one of the best takeaways from this video for me, the importance of communication, especially when it comes to something as important as setting boundaries. thank you for this video!
First kiss on the day of our marriage. My boyfriend and I agreed that we are going to share our first kiss on our wedding day. we want to glorify God even in our physical affection. oftentimes, kissing leads couple to sin... we are just humans. I got your point though.
Kisses aren't always sexual. They can be show of affection, a means of saying thank you, or--in some cultures--a greeting. But I understand what you're saying.
You are right. It is unfortunate that America has so deeply sexualized physical touch and so many other things. In the history of England and America kissing between sisters, friends, and older people was normal. Like you say it was and is still normal in many places. But in the US many people say it's gay. Holding hands, too, used to be normal between friends and still is in other countries but is now restricted to children or romantic couples in the US.
Rachel Fagan, Singer Good point. But that was only "chaste" kissing(aka the cheek). Not deep tongue kissing. I kiss my dogs but not with my tongue. Only my husband gets the tongue 😍. But seriously, I agree that holding hands, etc is such a lovely thing and it's too bad that those sweet, simple expressions of affection and regard are over-sexualized in our culture.
kissing without having sex confusses the body. when you kiss other parts of your body think you're trying to go all the way. Simply everything by not kissing
I have debated the no kissing before marriage and honestly gone back and forth on the idea. I think you made the best point about communication at the beginning of the relationship. It is truly vital to the health of all relationships.
My husband and I spoke openly about what we were comfortable with when we first started dating. We agreed to kiss once we were engaged. This allowed us to build a strong friendship without the temptations. But I must say once we were engaged and began kissing, it was extremely tempting to go further after this. I think the main things Christians need to be wary of is where they kiss, eg being alone or at night or laying on a couch all were bigger temptations for us
Communication is key... like for reals. I love that you guys started with the communication first I think that's really beautiful. Loved your perspective on it.
As a young teen setting the boundaries very strongly helped me avoid getting engrossed in an unhealthy relationship. Now a young adult, I appreciate how those values helped put me in a place of really valuing my worth highly and protectig myself from bad influences. I am not sure I would be so legalistic with it now, but I am certain I would feel strongly about letting a man know what I was and wasn't going to be comfortable with. Much to learn, but being clear early in helps to weed out the fakes from the real deal I am not looking to date anyone for quite a few years, but I think physical contact is a beautiful way of showing love for another (in friendship or in a love relationship) and I would only allow this as a form or trust between myself and
I kinda agree with a lot of what you said. For me, I know that I will have to create very serious physical boundaries because I struggled with sexual sin. I think its very important for every believer to do some soul-searching and be aware of their breaking points.
No kissing because there is still potential that the relationship is not God's will. So kissing someone before marriage is not treating your brother or sister in all purity.
The Bible says "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. " 1st Corinthians 7:1-2... oops, guess you missed this one. lol Praise God that you picked the right girl to kiss! ;0) I'm not sure we can define Gods idea of "sexual activity" but I do know that kissing is the beginning... as they call it "first base". I am doing as this verse says and giving my first kiss only to my husband on our wedding day. I appreciate the fact that your even speaking about this though. It's not common today. :0)
Hello Sunshine Vlogs ya we should save everything for the wedding day and the marriage bed. Even if some have made mistakes they can start now. God washes our sins from scarlet and makes them white as snow. marantha!!! 👏
godistheanswer123ify Amen sister! Maranatha! And it's not too hard to set boundaries... it's harder to stay strong when their are less boundaries. Let prayer and a focus on God be the bond. Physical interaction distracts from the important relationship building, comunication growing time before marriage. And as my pastor/daddy says "purity is not perfection it is the willingness to change when confronted with the truth."
I'm all for it. Showing affection. Being passionate. Kissing. Holding hands. To be held and be free to hold him (futuristically speaking). Yeah I know it sounds dreamy, but it can happen, give a girl a break. I've been single for 9 yrs and 2 months. Next month I'll be 27 and still a virgin. And saying it like that, you'll think I'm not happy about it. Well, I'm not. Yes I made a promise to God that I'll keep my virginity until my wedding day, and I like setting boundaries. But unfortunately, I haven't been enjoying my singleness the way I desire. And I haven't dated in a long time, neither have I had much dates. And it makes me unhappy. And I know there are many others like me, guys and ladies, going through the same thing, but there's no support circle to go to and receive encouragement.
You are encouraged by me, I'm a sister. And there are other brother's and sisters around you who would be more than glad to support you on your journey. God has saved you from brutal heartache that can sometimes come with a relationship. Belive me, I've been there. I've only now decided to let God take the wheel, and im passed 30. Single and waiting on god to lead me to the one. Be strong and pray to god ask him for his guidence and for your strength to persevere. ✝️
Thank you. I appreciate you saying this. I'm 32 now and still single. Still a virgin. Still holding the faith. Or trying to. As just last year a guy I had an interest in tried to rape me. And it wasn't easy seeing him out of the blue a few months ago, smiling at me and looking at me like he still wanted it, even going as far as to hug me like he truly did nothing wrong. I took the opportunity to let him know he was wrong and down right disgusting and he was better off out of my life permanently. This dude go tell me that's the past and we will always be friends. I don't know why I just mentioned that out of the blue. I guess it was to make the point that I still got hurt in so many ways in spite of the wait.
I wanted to wait for marriage to kiss, long story short I did not, but one thing that I rationalized it out with was that it is #1 important to have that intimacy between just souls and minds: getting to know each other for who you are as a person, if you don't have that, then what is apart of the relationship? but I also realized that a certain level of physical intimacy is important too, because physical intimacy (not sex) can set the founding blocks of trust on a deep emotional level. of course I'm not saying one should just go all out and just be 100% tempted and have sex, all I'm saying is that those long hugs, hand holding, cute little pecks can be more helpful for deep emotions, rather than being seen as a bad entity. That's my take on it. I'm Catholic, but I still have much to learn. :)
Currently I'm reading Boundaries by Cloud & Townsend. I'm learning to set my boundaries higher than I have. It's a struggle. I was dating a man once who told me he wanted to wait until the alter to kiss me & and for some reason I let my guard down. I began thinking "This is it! This is my future husband!" Well he manipulated me and got what he wanted later! It was awful. He blamed me for what happened between us. I want to encourage other young women that may read this & know that just bc a man my say with his lips he doesn't want to kiss you can sometimes be manipulation. His action speak louder than his words!
If two people that were in a relationship didn't even kiss or hold hands it would be more like a friendship than a relationship and then what would be the point if all you did was treat your girlfriend or boyfriend like a normal friend then how can you determine between a friendship and a relationship it wouldn't even be worth dating someone like that if you couldn't least hold their hands like there has to be something different between just a normal friendship and a relationship if you treat a relationship like a friendship then there's no point of even dating that person just doesn't make any logical sense
Always thought about that too, you can practically be brother and sister,😂 of course nothing beyond that boundary everything else should be saved for marriage.
I seriously appreciate your opinion on this :D My fiancé and I are two weeks away from marriage, and comfortably kiss and cuddle... But somebody I dated years ago when I was younger, even if I had married him, I wouldn't have dreamed of doing so before marriage. I very strongly believe that it's a very individual thing, because while my ex-bf was a man who struggled with lust and had a previous porn addiction, and I would have felt very uncomfortable making his life pre-marriage harder by being physical at all, my soon-to-be husband is totally different and I know that our physical relationship isn't a struggle for him but rather the opposite and healthy for both of us... Also, I'm of the opinion that that book(I kissed dating goodbye) did a ridiculous amount of damage. X.X People need to understand that "dating" is used to get to know somebody, to know if you WANT to marry them, instead of entering an intentional relationship that's treated almost the same as an engagement with almost an absolute stranger xd Bad idea, do not recommend.
I believe in complete abstinence. I won't even hold hands. Never put yourself in a situation you have to stand up for yourself. Marriage is meant for one man and one woman. I want my first kiss to be with the man I spend forever with. I don't believe in divorce either
I think kissing before marriage for Christians is just not okay. There is nothing like being strong enough to avoid the temptation of going beyond kissing because we are humans and we get carried away and the next thing you know, you have gone beyond just kissing and you end up repenting all the time. The reason I don't kiss in my relationship isn't because I am strong, but its because I'm weak and I know just kissing opens the door for even more (both ways). Another thing, Jesus said, if you look at a woman and desire her, you have committed adultery, how much more kissing? To add on this, our bodies are the temple of the holy spirit so we should use it for the glory of God. Try kissing in those days when you're having a great fellowship with the Lord, and trust me, when you, it won't flow as before unless you repent. I gotta highlight one more thing though, some things are better learnt when you're on your knees, seeking God, asking him to teach you, reading the word and so on..debates are informative but when you go back to your closet and pray, you'll know the truth.
This thing is a thing of the mind but I get your point, I think a kiss can be non lustful, just the way something as harmful as a hug can be lustful so it depends
I don't think kissing is bad in anyway! Kissing is one another is a way to show affection to those u love. People have this notion that God is against affection or something! He is a God of pleasure too! If you show affection, that isn't dishonoring God, but if u highly exalt pleasure above his will, then u are dishonoring God! If you lack self control and you don't have the best interest or loving a person u are with, then u are dishonoring God! Your intentions are what matters! If u are a self righteousness person, it wouldn't matter if u wait till marriage to kiss the person, because self-righteousness or pharisee mindset is dishonoring God!
Exactly. People preach Sexual Immorality when in reality is all about Sexual Morality (& Intimacy). If things like kisses and stimulation was bad why didn't Jesus or Moses condemn it. If being affectionate keeps you two passionate about each other and you are not lustful animals is it not Sexually Moral? Is it not moral to show affection , love and intimacy to the one you wish to love forever? Is is not moral to be affectionate with each other so to not lust after others, use porn, and create a balance life? If your intention is wrong and you're using the person for selfish desire and pure lust and abusing them emotional that is Immoral. I recommend people reread the Songs of Songs literally. You will see Solomon TOOK the woman and she longed for her Beloved. She reminiscences about their intimacy and even talk about kissing on the mouth and breast like fruit and more. Song of Songs is about a woman deny the most powerful man in the world because she loves and longs for the one she was intimate with who will be her husband one day. This is a great video read of the literal Song of Songs story too. @
I think holding hands and hugging is usually fine but the lines becomes blurred when it comes to cuddling and kissing because at the end of the day it comes down to the statute of your heart. If cuddling and kissing, leads you into temptations then, the Bible says flee from it. For me though, I don’t have a conviction from it, I personally show my affection through cuddling with my boyfriend and feeling connected to him through a kiss. Since both my partner and I have the love language of Physical Touch so that’s just how we both show our affection for our each other. So like I said,, be led by the spirit. There were times when we were kissing and I heard from the Holy Spirit to stop and I did. They are other times when it’s okey because God loves us and it is natural that we want to show our love especially for our partner.
What an amazing video, I agree with you 110% - we decide if it is okay or if it is not according to our own boundaries and morals, my girlfriend and I started off as best friends - we got to know each other on a spiritual and emotional level before anything physical. You are a true vessel of God. I've been watching your videos for a while now and its really amazing to see someone as young as your serving God so passionately. Thank you
Gerron Mason , possibly very good , but I’m concerned that a woman knows immediately if you are eligible for a partner . It’s possible that you may have been eligible immediately and just progressed slowly. It’s just not probable. Taking a man out of the friend zone is insincere of a woman , and if that’s the case she won’t respect you . I personally wouldn’t build my life with a woman on that situation.
while I didn't 100% agree with everything in Joshua Harris's book, it's still one of my favorites because I really got a lot out of it and the way he explained things really made sense. I don't think it's necessarily sinful to kiss before marriage, but I think it's really smart that you and your girlfriend held off for several months on doing that so you could better get to know each other first. and that's one of the things Josh talks about in the book. That getting physical right away can keep you from truly getting to know the real person you're dating because the physical side of the relationship becomes the focus and can even blind you to a lot of things. and that's just one of many things I found really smart and helpful in the book.
i think kissing is a huge part of a relationship and also a huge indicator of compatibility and can tell you a lot about a person and how you feel about them, whether consciously or subconsciously, and, at least for me, is something i really don't think i could do without. that being said i feel like it's important to consider what kind of kissing and for what purpose. a full on hours long makeout session every minute you spend with someone desperately trying to hold back from sex but always failing and going a little further physically each time is really a bad idea and only ends with tons of regret and ruining what could have been good.. but i do feel like the terror and excitement of the "magical first kiss" is something every relationship should have and deserves to experience... it can't happen if its planned or forced or held back from, it should be allowed to bloom and come naturally in its own time just like the love you hope to have with that person.
I think saving the first kiss for marriage is absolutely romantic and very beautiful. It also is very pure. But it is very hard. I guess the best thing is to go step by step a little bit further with the agreement of your partner.
In my opinion Kissing: yes Making out: no Point is, as long as you can control yourself and not be tempted sexually than I don’t see anything wrong with kissing.
ThatChristianVlogger That would be nice! My mom forbids all TV and movies (even stuff like spongebob) because any distractions or anything that isn't related to further God's kingdom is evil. I think she has a point to some extent but it's gets really irrataing
Phiphi Cupcake ok I'm gonna tell you straight out your mom is dumb not every thing is a religious thing plus it's not teaching against your religion sooooo your mom needs to go into the real world news flash not everyone is Christan some people and gay get over
Until I was 18 I thought my first kiss would be on my wedding day but 2 points; that will mean you're being watched as you first try kissing someone and it's going to look terrible because it WILL Be terrible, I'd probably be to scared to even do it at all while people are there. Second point- gestures like kissing, holding hands and just being connected with your partner in a loving, trusting and happy way is natural progression of most relationships. I think that if you actually don't want to give that to someone after getting to know them, then you also don't want to stay with them long term. But I support those who want to stay pure as possible. Purity is a matter of what is in your heart however and you should be mindful when getting more comfortable with someone.
My fiance and I met on Christian Mingle, and emailed, chatted, then Skyped for several months before we met in person. So we had a good, long time to get to know each other, what our goals were, etc. before kissing. We decided we did want to kiss before marriage (but definitely save our virginity for our wedding night). Neither of us wanted that beautiful, special first kiss to be turned into an awkward first performance in front of a live audience on our wedding day. We're glad we made that choice. :)
MissCrazyCatLady12 I met my husband on Christian Mingle too! Our chemistry was so electric that we nearly ended up making out on our first date! (We were both in our 30s when we met so we'd both dated before, which made waiting to kiss absolutely insane for us to do. Plus our primary love language is Touch.) The first guy I dated from the website was a few years younger than me and hadn't had his first kiss yet because his only previous gf was in the "first kiss on your wedding day" camp. I think I told him that I didn't want to wait til the wedding to kiss cause that's a super intimate special moment that's probably gonna be pretty awkward too. I did tell him that I wanted to kiss him but I wouldn't do so until he gave me permission first because anyone's first kiss is a special thing. (I had no qualms with asking him out and being direct like that about kissing.) So thanks for agreeing that kissing is special and not to be done casually but also not to be shared in front of your entire wedding party. Your user name is great! I said for years before I met my husband that I would rather become a crazy cat lady than marry the wrong guy! God gave me a husband so now we can be crazy cat people together. :-)
Because it is an innocent kind of affection.it's not inherently sexual, and for a lot of prior, it's not a big deal. The Bible never even implies that kissing is a sin, so it's just a matter of conviction. Some might be tempted by it, but a lot of Christians don't feel any temptation from kissing. To me, kissing can be an important part of a relationship. Of course, the main priority should be getting to know each other on a non-physical level, but kissing is good too, for emotional bonding. It's just a way to show loving, caring affection (btw, I'm not talking about full-on making out lol, that can be very sexual). Along with holding hands, and hugs, including long ones. Long hugs are scientifically shown to increase bonding and emotional intimacy between two people. And not all "intimacy" is sexual intimacy.
I really liked this video and have never really thought about this before. I think I will wait until marriage or maybe engagement for my first kiss even though it seems most of my friends have already kissed people and people make fun of me for it but I guess God's words are the only ones that matter.
You Said the bible only condenms sexual activities before marriage, right? If I understand well, kissing is not a sexual act according to your thoughts. If it's not sexual , why do people only kiss people they're sexually attracted to?
But doesn't the bible say to greet one another with a holy kiss? ;) Just joking! I mean It really does say that but it's not about romantic relationships. ha! I really do think that it is a tricky thing and both man and woman have to agree on what is the best decision for their relationship to help keep the relationship holy. Holiness Has to be our aim above all else. So much easier said than done! But it is also why it is important for BOTH the guy and girl to have a personal and growing relationship with the Lord and striving for righteousness in his and her own lives!
yes, and that holiness and righteousness is looking to God for His will, constantly seeking Him and being open to and move in His leading. Accountability from others following God is golden.
Biblical dating doesn't honor God when we kiss each other, my girlfriend will be my sister till the day I marry her! (1 Timothy 5:1) The bible say also to flee from all kind of ( formication or sexual immorality) Is kissing a kind of sexual immorality ? It depends, if it was by mistake as what happened with you the good night kiss, this isn't a sin, but the lust kiss is a sin, but for me I try to hold my kissing until the day of marriage! We all fall no body is perfect except Jesus, but we walk by spirit and listen to Holy Spirit inside us!
here's a story: I didn't want to date anybody, and the girl I'm dating didn't really want to date anybody; we both wanted to avoid complications. We both seeked out what was already amazing in our lives... then she started hanging out with my friends, and I have no clue how we even started dating lol; our friends didn't really know we were dating lol, but then I walked up to them with her on my back to surprise them. they were actually trying to get her to date a different guy, and even though we both didn't want to date, somehow we were brought together. She said it would be romantic if our first kiss was in the rain. The day it rained... idk what happened, but we have no clue who kissed who because we both didn't have the intention to kiss. The kiss just happened to happen... idk how. We were even looking away from eachother when we went to kiss..... I am still clueless to how this happened........this was all before I was Christian; I was actually Buddhist before, and she was Christian. I switched over to Christianity eventually, and she said when she was younger that she prayed to marry a christian man... and somehow I became christian.... miracles...
The fact that "touch" is so critical in the chapter of Acts should convict people for thinking kissing is okay. If you disagree your looking at marriage with wisdom of the world and not the wisdom of God. You ought to decide if a man or woman is meant to be your husband or wife by walking in the Spirit and learning to tune your ear to his gentle voice, not physicality. If you "feel" your being tempted then you MUST spend time with Him and know your identity and completeness in Christ. We think we are super slaves to sin when we have a Spirit that is Holly and gives us self discipline.
I love this. You approached it without making anyone feel guilty. Not that the other videos on this purposefully make people feel guilty, but I feel other Christian videos on this can give off such a judgmental vibe, but not the case in yours... thank you!!
I agree with you man my relationship with my gf who's a Christian too we did what you did with your current gf we got to know each other like reeeeallllllyyy know each other and talk deep stuff and Christian vaules we finally came to the conclusion around the 10th month of us dating ( it's 1 1/2 years rn and will propose this summer :)) that we can kiss and honor God with it and we can deepen our love for each other in another way
Thank you sooooo much for talking on this subject. I have been praying and thinking about this topic specifically for a long long time. I didn’t live my life for Christ for many years and only recently rededicated myself to God as an adult. Since doing so, dating has obviously completely changed for me and it has been very difficult to go from where I was, to reestablishing healthy boundaries in a relationship now. I’m thankfully in an amazing relationship with a very Godly man and I’m so happy with him! He truly is the best man I have ever met. We’ve been together 4 months now, but it has been difficult because I wasn’t sure where exactly the line should be drawn physically and both of us really want to honor God both spiritually and physically. I also read the book by Joshua Harris in my younger years, and it also made me have a toxic view on relationships at that time, and just a very unrealistic view of a godly relationship in general. Even though I later didn’t agree with his book, I didn’t want to just throw out everything either. At this time, I’ve actually come to the same conclusion you did in this video and my bf did as well. We did talk about it and it has definitely kept our relationship very healthy with each other and we constantly strive to encourage each other to continue becoming closer with God. One thing that I really admire and love that my boyfriend did (which never occurred in my worldly relationships) was that when we went too far, he apologized and asked if we could pray to ask God to forgive us for winning against him and ask him to help us honor him. I was so amazed and honestly shocked with this concept because he wasn’t condemning me for leading him on, or condemning himself. He simply owned up to his actions and gave me the option to own up to mine and ask God to forgive us and move forward. This really encouraged me and made me desire all the more to do right not only by God but to myself and him. People are bound to make mistakes but as my father once said, God doesn’t waist anything, not even our mistakes. God knows our hearts and he know when we are really trying, but when we do fall short (and don’t used our downfall as an excuse to continue on sinning) then God can use it to help us grow and even expand his grace on us. No, we shouldn’t take advantage of Gods grace, but I think it’s essential that we don’t have a toxic relationship with ourselves and ignore the grace that God does give when we fall short. I don’t believe kissing and cuddling is against what God has planned before marriage, but I do agree that sex before marriage and or oral is not appropriate because that is having sexual intimacy which i believe should be reserved for marriage. But, like you stated in this video, I too believe it depends on where a person is at and what a person can handle. Ultimately, it’s something that a couple should not only talk about but pray about, and ask God for guidance on. And by no means am I saying I have this completely figured out but that is also what lead me to this video is because I really want to know more on this subject and what God actually says about it. So, thank you again for sharing on this subject. I’m very grateful!
This is pretty much exactly what I needed to hear. I was never sure whether it was ok , and I wanted to wait. At least for a while. I wanted to keep God at the center of the relationship, and it was hard to explain to my, then, boyfriend. I am glad that I know about this now.
I think it just depends on you and your boyfriend or girlfriend. If you and them can both kiss without taking it farther, I think it's ok. However, we are told not to be a stumbling block in Romans, so if you or the person you're in a relationship struggle with wanting to go further, then I think it's best to save it for marriage.
Thanks very much for this inspiring video. I've already kissed but it wasn't of my fault cuz it surprised me. I told myself that i'll have my first kiss before the altar, but he broke it. This matter of communication is true and that's what we keep doing. We pray for each other and ask God to approve and lead us through. God Bless You!!
Kissing before marriage depends on the couple. Communicating about boundaries at the beginning of the relationship is wise and such a great start to a any relationship. You can tell your spiritual mentors (maybe a spiritual couple) about your boundaries so that they can hold you accountable. Spiritual couples can be a huge help as they might have more experience and wisdom in helping you have healthy relationship.
If I ever get into relationship, I would wait for kissing until both of us confirmed that we love each other and are planning to become more than just a gf and bf. I personally think, especially with girls, we tend to gain more "emotions" when we kiss, have sex, and sometimes even just by hugs, lol. Sex and kissing make dating relationships chaotic because we love how the person kisses or the sex with that person, but we confuse that with loving that person. This is just an observation, lol.
I personally believe that we should go into dating with the intention of marrying that person. As well, that just means the individual with this mindset should seriously consider who they date. People we date who might have lots of “baggage “ might lead a pure Christian into sin and a ton of heartache. Gotta find that Proverbs’ 31 women or someone like 80 percent close to it. What do ya say?🤗
Sciences revealed there hormons of attraction in saliva and that they make people remain fond of their partners regardless the degree of sincerity. it is up to you play with the fire but telling others that they should do the same is what I find a bit dangerous.
Waiting to kiss until the day of marriage sounds scary ! I'd just be like "Man, Oh Man, what if there's no spark !!" haha ! Great video man this was super awesome and informative !
Really practical advice that was, first and foremost, biblically inspired by desiring to honor the Lord! My wife and I had to stop kissing up to our marriage because it was causing me problems. So, I think it's important to understand that you can always put the brakes on. BUT, once tasted, the fruit can only be spat out, not untasted.
Kissing is acting on a lustful desire (before marriage). Jesus tells us that whosoever even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery in his heart. This is not rocket science guys :) If you can kiss a gf/bf without it coming from lust, then you're the exception and thats fine.
Rise On Fire Oh myyyy. Thank you! This actually cleared my confusion up lol. It doesn't say in the bible you cannot kiss. Kissing is not necessarily sexual. In the old testament Jacob greeted Rachel with a kiss. It really depends if you are doing it in a lustful way or an affectionate way.
@Rise on Fire, kissing isn't a lustful desire. If you kiss someone on the cheek or kiss someone on the mouth briefly, that isn't lust. Stop spreading false fear.
I've watched a lot of videos like this and, although I see things somewhat differently to you, I LOVE the way that you spoke about this topic! A lot of people speak as if theirs is the only way to interpret God's word, and I love your openness for discussion alongside your conviction. Thank you!
Oscar Guzman i am 17 and i had in my 15 a catastrophic relationship and then i decided I'll stay single now i found a guy who cares for me and loves me soo future always keeps surprises!
Oscar Guzman Hi, in Islam religion, we do have a set of specific rules on what to do and what not to do in life. Because God knows about human temptations, etc. Rather than figuring out what God ask us to obey, I believe Alquran (Islam book) has everything especially this kind of thing. A lot of debate in Christian about if kissing allowable before marriage or not, how women should dress to please God and other moral values are discussed in Islam in details. May God bless you and all other Christians. Peace.
On point Sir. Sex before marriage is explicitly spoken of and it's clear in the bible but the Bible doesn't say anything regarding holding hands, kiss and stuff like that, the Bible tho talks about lust and sexual immorality, so it all comes down to be a personal issue, if you personally know for sure that kissing or holding of hands would bring to your mind lustful and impure thoughts leading to somewhere else then *stop* its just simple as that, if your spirit is not feeling OK, just tell your partner and make that a boundary, it's not about what *someone* says its right or wrong.... It's about your walk with God and how you know and identify how something is damaging to your spiritual growth, especially when that thing is not explicitly spoken of in the bible. My opinion
I don't think there's anything wrong with kissing before marriage. I honestly don't see how you can choose to marry someone if you don't have some sort of physical relationship.
Yes it's called DATING WITH A PURPOSE. In terms of kissing, I don't find an issue with kissing. But I can see why it could be recommended not to, because of the temptation it causes.
Mia Marquez wowww if your out of high school and safe kissing can lead to sex wow so bad it's not that hard if you wanna wait till marriage wait if you don't don't
but without extended hugging kissing and even sex that's just a really good friendship actually extended cuddling doesn't my best friends are constantly hugging each other
In my personal opinion I don't think kissing before marrige could be considered wrong necessarily, however I do believe that if you begin going further than a kiss it would be considered as wrong. But for kissing I wouldn't worry. :)
I was interested in possibly dating this guy, and I found out he was interested in the possibility also. I remember just talking with him about our boundaries, and it made us respect each other so much! He had began just tickling me, little things like that, but I heard the conviction to just postpone that sort of thing, and discuss our physical boundaries as Chrisitians. glad we did, b.c. we ended up deciding not to date, and in the end we both kept our relationship with God as a focus! ♡
I think I'm the Bible it only says no sex before marriage but kissing and such can lead to it but I don't think it matters I just think you need to be able to hold yourself from having sex
I am only 62 years old so not new to Christianity but also have not dated for over 40 years. Juanita and I married in Dec, 1976. It seem that I remember one of the guild lines that was set down by our leaders back then was always double or triple date with other Christian couples. Helps to act as a moral compass when in a new relationship. Hope that helps.
Kissing is foreplay to sex. Period. You cannot french kiss without being tempted to go further. In fact, french kissing is usually the first thing married people do when it is there time to be intimate with one another. It is like adding the oil to the pan and heating prior to cooking. Almost all sexual activity both good and bad starts with lips touching. Holding hands is also a bit of foreplay sexually, too, as is footsie. Putting your arm around your girlfriend is ok and much better and safer. It is intimate enough to say you are dating or courting and it is not flesh on flesh. Just avoid touching and massaging and playing with hair. That is only foreplay happening without you realizing it. Just having your arm on the back of the seat behind her head is plenty for her to know she is safe and with you. And if you can contain yourself enough to just kiss on the cheek to show your affection pre-marriage, that would be better. Also watch what clothing you are wearing on your "dates" because the way you dress can also be a hindrance to you and your girlfriend behaving. No outfits that show a lot of leg and cleavage, girls. No outfits that show more skin than clothes. And guys, go easy on the cologne and gum and stuff. You don't want to say with your appearance, I am clean and smelling good and have my mouth ready for kissing. You want to have clean breath but not make it seem like you are chewing gum because kissing is going to happen later. Same with the cologne. Just smell clean. Don't smell seductive.
My boyfriend and I started talking about this stuff first. But we soon came to realize that kissing was a hard one to set because when it's out of love it feels fine but when it may be out of lust for those feelings it's not. Personaly why I watched this video is because I don't want it to be out of lust but only out of love and it's hard to walk that line. We pulled back our boundries but idk what the best thing to do is.
my main question is my gf isn't a christian but she knows i am and respects my ideals. but i also want to start introducing her into Christianity but how do i do that without making it uncomfortable or make is seem like im forcing it cause i know that unless they accept jesus on their own accord it means nothing
+samm sosa honestly that's a super hard question. I'm not sure I have the right answer. I'd personally not feel comfortable dating someone without similar life and faith values
ThatChristianVlogger i understand but i feel as though i should be trying to bring people into christ. Like paul said if we stayed away from all none christians then we'd have to stay way from everyone
+samm sosa that's true and I would encourage you to be a witness. However, in my experience, this is much more dangerous in romantic relationships. More often than not, the non Christian influences the Christian more than the other way around
ThatChristianVlogger yea you're right about that but i think that only happens when the christian that doesn't have a firm stance in the lord which is why i think god waited this long to bring her to me. Plus like i said i told her from the get go that i was a christian and she knows my ideals and even though she isn't chritian some of those ideals fall in line with mine. Like the no sex before marriage.
ThatChristianVlogger you are spot on in my opinion and we should sacrifice as Christians but not sacrifice our souls for the flesh of others, it can be risky. As a person that dated a person who I thought “I could bring to Christ” was only a delay to the person that was ready to receive Christ before the relationship even started.
I need to let you know that you are such a beautiful person. I feel in my heart that you have so much love for people, and I think that is clear through the work that you do and the rewards you give on patreon. I hope to soon be in a more financially stable place and I will then definitely support your work! God's blessing for you, your family and your work!
I'm really enjoying your videos! Your perspective is honest, fresh, and realistic. I also love how you are open to opposing views and don't condemn others with different opinions. We need more of this from young Christians!
The best way to know somebody is talking, not touching. When you start dating & touching you always end up with sexual fantasies. The sexual fantasies will boost your flesh and soul with thousands of emotions and feelings for having sex.
Very interesting! I really like hearing your perspective. Personally I think that physical attraction is important in a relationship so I do believe in kissing before marriage for sure. I think that physical and emotional attraction will go hand in hand. However I understand that it is different for everyone? No individual or couple is the same.
No, because you never know if you are going to marrie that person until it actually happens so if you break up that's being unpure to your future bride/husband
Loved the video. I've struggling with this for the past year or so and I know not to take your word as law but it's nice to have another unbiased christian's perspective.
I'm Muslim 15 and I tryin to know more bout Christian hopely I'll be a Christian person one day💖
I hope you will be a Christian one day, too. God bless!
John 3:16-17 NIV
16 For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through Him.
@@jeremygjonaj1487 thx man ❤
I was agnostic before but turning to Jesus was the best decision in my life.
Put your faith on the Lord! He will guide you and fill your thirst for Him ❤️
Zack, the simple message of the Christian that the world, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, and all the other religions very sadly miss is an atonement for their sins so that they can be forgiven and stand in the presence of a holy God, who alone is God. God desires that His creation would repent and trust in His only Son Jesus who died for the sins of the world. If you want to read about this, open the books of John and 1st John in the New Testament portions of the Christian Bible. The Christian Bible has been breathed out of God's mouth and given for the people in the world to read, that is anyone who would choose to seek the Lord to know Him(Acts 17).
I will pray that you will come to Jesus and see all your chains of sin broken, peace restored, and a new life given in the name that is higher than all names, the name of Isa Masih our Lord. 🙏
I wish there would be more men like you ❤️ please continue to serve God
Trust me, I have my downfalls like many other men. We need more men like Jesus, not like myself
Suzanne Guevarra
There are.
@@JustinKhoe Uuuuuuhh I think that she's talking about in the human level of preaching.
thats it sir ......correct
@@JustinKhoe so true!
In my opinion, I don't really think there is anything wrong w kissing before marriage, but make sure u don't go to far w the kiss
Yup yup, definitely!
But kissing could lead things to the next level. After all we are weak in flesh.
Shlaina Fleurisme if you pray for resistance and keep your promises to God, nothing can change
I think it depends on what you think you can handle. If you believe you can kiss your partner without it going to far then by all means go ahead if you really want to but be prepared to want more.
Wolf Lover I agree. You just need to know your boundaries and keep a sound and pure mind
I honestly didn't even know this was such a big issue until I stumbled across this video. Personally, I am following God's direction for who I will date and consequently marry, and have pretty strict personal boundaries in place. For me personally, I see nothing wrong with kissing, cuddling, hugging, or holding hands, as long as it doesn't go farther than that. Just my opinion.
Denise Kimball Thank you. Thank you.
If you're following God'd direction for who you date and marry, then you can as well welcome what He says in his word about holiness. If Jesus says if you look at a woman and desire her, you have committed adultery, how much more kissing? cuddling?
but those things can possibly lead to "farther than that".
U GOT NO MAYO exactly! I had the same mindset, " a little kiss is nothing" but it most likely will lead to more and I only learned that from experiencing it. It's better to have solid boundaries to help with temptation and prevent escalation
I think kissing without lusting or rubbing the partner in away that's lustful is wrong I believe holding hands is fine and hugging is fine but making out and cuddling wrong is pretty lustful
Kissing is okay but leave room for the holy spirit! Hand holding and hugging is alright too. Balance is key. You don't want to starve yourself from ANY physical contact whatsoever because that's not healthy for your relationship. Just keep it respectful and God-honoring.
(I have no experience whatsoever in this area lol so this is just my somewhat uninformed opinion.) :P
Very well stated!
I know I'm a bit late but, shut up
9
@@jeanpaulgartier3404 Wow, with what right do you tell her to shut up? She has her complete freedom and right to state whatever she believes in. Do you like it if another person told you to shut up only because you stated what you believe in?
My two cents: Kissing may spur certain "emotions" and lead to temptation. As Christians, we are not told to be strong and withstand temptation, we are called to be smart and flee from it. With that said, I think physical touch may give the devil an opportunity to tempt us into something that is no longer innocent. Think of it like alcohol; drinking is not a sin, but drunkenness is. Say you drink thinking it isn't a sin anyway, then you miscalculate your capacity and end up intoxicated. Sin. I would walk the edge knowing I wouldn't fall; but unfortunately one cannot know if he would fall.
David Ian Go Well said :-)
David Ian Go a kiss is not that serious lol.....if a person can't kiss without having sex they have deeper issues- like lack of self control
@@TheBiopoem yes but the problem is not whether it leads to sex or not. The problem is that kissing is sexual. Not if you kiss your mother or someone in that way but in the way you would if you are attracted to someone.
@@TheBiopoem just lustful thought is a sin it is stated in the bible that it starts with the eyes which means that the thought even though there may not be actions to back it up is still not ok so it is better to not tempt faith
Well said+
Man, I'm seeing a lot of comments saying, rather confidently, that "I won't kiss until marriage" or "I believe in complete abstinence". You guys are so strong and I admire that and I ask for your prayers because I am currently in a relationship where that is what he believes but I'm not sure if I agree. I really want to hold his hand, ya feel? I just don't know what to do. I should pray about it some more, I suppose
Anna it will be Good if there is no kiss before marriage because if u kiss u didn't have any assurance u didn't go further.But Pray and discussion about word of God makes u stay clean and make it in ur marriage is Good.
i know but ...are u strong enough to say no if it is more than kiss?
Ephesians 6:10 Christian Standard Bible (CSB)
Christian Warfare
10 Finally, be strengthened by the Lord and by his vast strength.
Pray for God's strength, He will give it.
You never have to let the devil have a foothold in your relationship. The person I’m seeing is really special to me so I don’t let it go too far because I knew if it did it may cause a lot of pain and I’ve been through enough of that to know that I don’t ever want to go through that.
on kissing, i think God would prefer to have us flee temptation not flirt with it
So you guys advocate no kissing prior to marriage?
To be on the safe side yes, not to say its sin.
fair enough :)
God bless you for such wisdom brother
Marco and Eunice... And you sis😄
I personally believe that God is not against kissing before marriage. It's away of showing compassion and love for another. But if we ourselves can't control our desires and are tempted easy then we should stay away from that. So I agree with you, and you did a great job on this!
Give me a bible verse where God is not against kissing please.
Lip kiss and romance with unknown person is a sin .
@@grammyslim5766 Song of Songs 7:7-10 New International Version (NIV)
7 Your stature is like that of the palm,
and your breasts like clusters of fruit.
8 I said, “I will climb the palm tree;
I will take hold of its fruit.”
May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine,
the fragrance of your breath like apples,
9 and your mouth like the best wine.
She
May the wine go straight to my beloved,
flowing gently over lips and teeth.[a]
10 I belong to my beloved,
and his desire is for me.
Refer to Song of Songs. A story that BELONGED to Solomon. In the story the woman was not talking about Solomon but trying to flee from him. She was talking about her beloved. Solomon TOOK her as his wife and she was not only tempted by the king but longed for and described the intimacy with her beloved, Shepard boy.
If you read the Song of Songs literally its about a king taking a woman who was betrothed. She speaks of kissing her beloved and more.
And no Solomon is not anyones ideal for marriage. The bible teaches of his success and sin. He had nearly 700 wives and concubines, was seduced by the idols of his wives, and thought he could have it all. Even having a faithful women betrothed to her beloved.
How many woman can deny a king while being intimate with her beloved of with she wants to marry at the end of book.
www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Song+of+Songs+7%3A7-10&version=NIV
"The Most Bewildering Book of The Bible"
ruclips.net/video/Cd6fafGL2es/видео.html
Kissing was the mistake I made because after that it was impossible to wait. So, guard your heart and keep yourself pure.
That conversation about boundaries is so important, because expectations kill relationships. The best book I've read on this topic and many others is one called "True Love Dates" by Debra Fileta. It's the most biblically mature and balanced perspective I've heard yet - I've read a quite a bit now. She is a professional counselor and often writes for Relevant Magazine as well.
Awesome! Relevant Magazine is teh stuff!!!
Michael Reynolds where could I find that book
Yeah, this statement hit home for me too. Just going off of stories and (lol) movies, people don't communicate this stuff and it ends in heartbreak.
yes, that was one of the best takeaways from this video for me, the importance of communication, especially when it comes to something as important as setting boundaries. thank you for this video!
Amazon has True Love Dates. amzn.to/2phCSCi
First kiss on the day of our marriage. My boyfriend and I agreed that we are going to share our first kiss on our wedding day. we want to glorify God even in our physical affection.
oftentimes, kissing leads couple to sin... we are just humans. I got your point though.
wow! Very cool! my sister in law did that too
WOW!!! 👏👏👏👏👏
Kissing does not lead people to sin, kissing in itself is a sexual act that should be done only in marriage . Kissing being unmarried is a sin
@@philippeboursiquot163 its not
@@philippeboursiquot163 wtf
Kisses aren't always sexual. They can be show of affection, a means of saying thank you, or--in some cultures--a greeting. But I understand what you're saying.
loL! Feels bad man
Very true
You are right. It is unfortunate that America has so deeply sexualized physical touch and so many other things. In the history of England and America kissing between sisters, friends, and older people was normal. Like you say it was and is still normal in many places. But in the US many people say it's gay. Holding hands, too, used to be normal between friends and still is in other countries but is now restricted to children or romantic couples in the US.
Rachel Fagan, Singer Good point. But that was only "chaste" kissing(aka the cheek). Not deep tongue kissing. I kiss my dogs but not with my tongue. Only my husband gets the tongue 😍. But seriously, I agree that holding hands, etc is such a lovely thing and it's too bad that those sweet, simple expressions of affection and regard are over-sexualized in our culture.
kissing without having sex confusses the body. when you kiss other parts of your body think you're trying to go all the way. Simply everything by not kissing
I have debated the no kissing before marriage and honestly gone back and forth on the idea. I think you made the best point about communication at the beginning of the relationship. It is truly vital to the health of all relationships.
Thanks Josh! I know it can be a tricky subject.
My husband and I spoke openly about what we were comfortable with when we first started dating. We agreed to kiss once we were engaged. This allowed us to build a strong friendship without the temptations. But I must say once we were engaged and began kissing, it was extremely tempting to go further after this. I think the main things Christians need to be wary of is where they kiss, eg being alone or at night or laying on a couch all were bigger temptations for us
talk about physical boundaries at first, such a gentleman!
Very true!
Communication is key... like for reals. I love that you guys started with the communication first I think that's really beautiful. Loved your perspective on it.
Aww thanks! Hope it was helpful :)
Communication is everything! Thank you
As a young teen setting the boundaries very strongly helped me avoid getting engrossed in an unhealthy relationship. Now a young adult, I appreciate how those values helped put me in a place of really valuing my worth highly and protectig myself from bad influences. I am not sure I would be so legalistic with it now, but I am certain I would feel strongly about letting a man know what I was and wasn't going to be comfortable with. Much to learn, but being clear early in helps to weed out the fakes from the real deal
I am not looking to date anyone for quite a few years, but I think physical contact is a beautiful way of showing love for another (in friendship or in a love relationship) and I would only allow this as a form or trust between myself and
I kinda agree with a lot of what you said. For me, I know that I will have to create very serious physical boundaries because I struggled with sexual sin. I think its very important for every believer to do some soul-searching and be aware of their breaking points.
Agreed, it's definitely a personal thing- something that might be different for each person
No kissing because there is still potential that the relationship is not God's will. So kissing someone before marriage is not treating your brother or sister in all purity.
Fair enough- I have several friends that feel the same
The Bible says "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. " 1st Corinthians 7:1-2... oops, guess you missed this one. lol Praise God that you picked the right girl to kiss! ;0) I'm not sure we can define Gods idea of "sexual activity" but I do know that kissing is the beginning... as they call it "first base". I am doing as this verse says and giving my first kiss only to my husband on our wedding day. I appreciate the fact that your even speaking about this though. It's not common today. :0)
Hello Sunshine Vlogs ya we should save everything for the wedding day and the marriage bed. Even if some have made mistakes they can start now. God washes our sins from scarlet and makes them white as snow. marantha!!! 👏
godistheanswer123ify Amen sister! Maranatha! And it's not too hard to set boundaries... it's harder to stay strong when their are less boundaries. Let prayer and a focus on God be the bond. Physical interaction distracts from the important relationship building, comunication growing time before marriage. And as my pastor/daddy says "purity is not perfection it is the willingness to change when confronted with the truth."
godistheanswer123ify Oh... I don't know why I assumed you were a sister and not a brother... Sorry if I got that wrong. lol
I'm all for it. Showing affection. Being passionate. Kissing. Holding hands. To be held and be free to hold him (futuristically speaking). Yeah I know it sounds dreamy, but it can happen, give a girl a break. I've been single for 9 yrs and 2 months. Next month I'll be 27 and still a virgin. And saying it like that, you'll think I'm not happy about it. Well, I'm not. Yes I made a promise to God that I'll keep my virginity until my wedding day, and I like setting boundaries. But unfortunately, I haven't been enjoying my singleness the way I desire. And I haven't dated in a long time, neither have I had much dates. And it makes me unhappy. And I know there are many others like me, guys and ladies, going through the same thing, but there's no support circle to go to and receive encouragement.
You are encouraged by me, I'm a sister. And there are other brother's and sisters around you who would be more than glad to support you on your journey. God has saved you from brutal heartache that can sometimes come with a relationship. Belive me, I've been there. I've only now decided to let God take the wheel, and im passed 30. Single and waiting on god to lead me to the one. Be strong and pray to god ask him for his guidence and for your strength to persevere. ✝️
Thank you. I appreciate you saying this. I'm 32 now and still single. Still a virgin. Still holding the faith. Or trying to. As just last year a guy I had an interest in tried to rape me. And it wasn't easy seeing him out of the blue a few months ago, smiling at me and looking at me like he still wanted it, even going as far as to hug me like he truly did nothing wrong. I took the opportunity to let him know he was wrong and down right disgusting and he was better off out of my life permanently. This dude go tell me that's the past and we will always be friends. I don't know why I just mentioned that out of the blue. I guess it was to make the point that I still got hurt in so many ways in spite of the wait.
I wanted to wait for marriage to kiss, long story short I did not, but one thing that I rationalized it out with was that it is #1 important to have that intimacy between just souls and minds: getting to know each other for who you are as a person, if you don't have that, then what is apart of the relationship?
but I also realized that a certain level of physical intimacy is important too, because physical intimacy (not sex) can set the founding blocks of trust on a deep emotional level. of course I'm not saying one should just go all out and just be 100% tempted and have sex, all I'm saying is that those long hugs, hand holding, cute little pecks can be more helpful for deep emotions, rather than being seen as a bad entity.
That's my take on it. I'm Catholic, but I still have much to learn. :)
I dont have a problem with kissing but i do feel like making out b4 marriage is definitely going to far
Kissing is making out leading to sex in most cases
@@grammyslim5766 I totally disagree. A kiss here and there is totally acceptable and does not necessarily lead to sex.
Currently I'm reading Boundaries by Cloud & Townsend. I'm learning to set my boundaries higher than I have. It's a struggle. I was dating a man once who told me he wanted to wait until the alter to kiss me & and for some reason I let my guard down. I began thinking "This is it! This is my future husband!" Well he manipulated me and got what he wanted later! It was awful. He blamed me for what happened between us. I want to encourage other young women that may read this & know that just bc a man my say with his lips he doesn't want to kiss you can sometimes be manipulation. His action speak louder than his words!
I am so glad I was recommended to your channel. I also really liked your video. Greetings from Venezuela
Oh how cool! Who shared the channel with you?
ThatChristianVlogger Becca from FarAwayDistance in one of her videos
oh how cool! Like a shoutout? Or a related vid?
ThatChristianVlogger a shoutout! I don't remember wich video though, but she mentioned yours and other channels :) it was a blessing
Georgina Embaid good
If two people that were in a relationship didn't even kiss or hold hands it would be more like a friendship than a relationship and then what would be the point if all you did was treat your girlfriend or boyfriend like a normal friend then how can you determine between a friendship and a relationship it wouldn't even be worth dating someone like that if you couldn't least hold their hands like there has to be something different between just a normal friendship and a relationship if you treat a relationship like a friendship then there's no point of even dating that person just doesn't make any logical sense
Always thought about that too, you can practically be brother and sister,😂 of course nothing beyond that boundary everything else should be saved for marriage.
@Henroy That's the whole point in dating😂
I've never kissed a girl yet but I always imagined my first kiss being when I proposed
Oh wow! That's cool!
ThatChristianVlogger thanks I appreciate that
Yup!
Awe that's nice !
that's so sad
I seriously appreciate your opinion on this :D My fiancé and I are two weeks away from marriage, and comfortably kiss and cuddle... But somebody I dated years ago when I was younger, even if I had married him, I wouldn't have dreamed of doing so before marriage. I very strongly believe that it's a very individual thing, because while my ex-bf was a man who struggled with lust and had a previous porn addiction, and I would have felt very uncomfortable making his life pre-marriage harder by being physical at all, my soon-to-be husband is totally different and I know that our physical relationship isn't a struggle for him but rather the opposite and healthy for both of us... Also, I'm of the opinion that that book(I kissed dating goodbye) did a ridiculous amount of damage. X.X People need to understand that "dating" is used to get to know somebody, to know if you WANT to marry them, instead of entering an intentional relationship that's treated almost the same as an engagement with almost an absolute stranger xd Bad idea, do not recommend.
Yes it's really good to have conversation about this and set boundaries. Good video! 👍
Thanks Olivia! Been in a relationship before with these types of conversations yet?
ThatChristianVlogger Yes of course! When I was younger. Now I'm married and we have a daughter. 😍❤
haha! whoops :)
ThatChristianVlogger 😀😍👍
So god has blessed us with marriage at the age of 19, given us a free house, and much more!! come check out our story!!
Hi, I'm Brazilian and I'm learning English and I'm using your channel to practice the "listen", and I liked so much.. I'm christian too.
awesome! hope I don't speak too quickly for you!
I believe in complete abstinence. I won't even hold hands. Never put yourself in a situation you have to stand up for yourself. Marriage is meant for one man and one woman. I want my first kiss to be with the man I spend forever with. I don't believe in divorce either
I can't agree any further..this is so good
And on the honeymoon if you are not pleasing, the man has the right to punch you in the face
I love you and your view point. You need your own channel i will support it
I think kissing before marriage for Christians is just not okay. There is nothing like being strong enough to avoid the temptation of going beyond kissing because we are humans and we get carried away and the next thing you know, you have gone beyond just kissing and you end up repenting all the time. The reason I don't kiss in my relationship isn't because I am strong, but its because I'm weak and I know just kissing opens the door for even more (both ways).
Another thing, Jesus said, if you look at a woman and desire her, you have committed adultery, how much more kissing?
To add on this, our bodies are the temple of the holy spirit so we should use it for the glory of God. Try kissing in those days when you're having a great fellowship with the Lord, and trust me, when you, it won't flow as before unless you repent.
I gotta highlight one more thing though, some things are better learnt when you're on your knees, seeking God, asking him to teach you, reading the word and so on..debates are informative but when you go back to your closet and pray, you'll know the truth.
Well said preacher😉
wow, well said
This thing is a thing of the mind but I get your point, I think a kiss can be non lustful, just the way something as harmful as a hug can be lustful so it depends
I don't think kissing is bad in anyway! Kissing is one another is a way to show affection to those u love. People have this notion that God is against affection or something! He is a God of pleasure too! If you show affection, that isn't dishonoring God, but if u highly exalt pleasure above his will, then u are dishonoring God! If you lack self control and you don't have the best interest or loving a person u are with, then u are dishonoring God!
Your intentions are what matters! If u are a self righteousness person, it wouldn't matter if u wait till marriage to kiss the person, because self-righteousness or pharisee mindset is dishonoring God!
nayinayi1 thank you!!! Preach!!
Exactly. People preach Sexual Immorality when in reality is all about Sexual Morality (& Intimacy). If things like kisses and stimulation was bad why didn't Jesus or Moses condemn it.
If being affectionate keeps you two passionate about each other and you are not lustful animals is it not Sexually Moral?
Is it not moral to show affection , love and intimacy to the one you wish to love forever?
Is is not moral to be affectionate with each other so to not lust after others, use porn, and create a balance life?
If your intention is wrong and you're using the person for selfish desire and pure lust and abusing them emotional that is Immoral.
I recommend people reread the Songs of Songs literally. You will see Solomon TOOK the woman and she longed for her Beloved. She reminiscences about their intimacy and even talk about kissing on the mouth and breast like fruit and more. Song of Songs is about a woman deny the most powerful man in the world because she loves and longs for the one she was intimate with who will be her husband one day.
This is a great video read of the literal Song of Songs story too.
@
I think holding hands and hugging is usually fine but the lines becomes blurred when it comes to cuddling and kissing because at the end of the day it comes down to the statute of your heart. If cuddling and kissing, leads you into temptations then, the Bible says flee from it.
For me though, I don’t have a conviction from it, I personally show my affection through cuddling with my boyfriend and feeling connected to him through a kiss. Since both my partner and I have the love language of Physical Touch so that’s just how we both show our affection for our each other.
So like I said,, be led by the spirit. There were times when we were kissing and I heard from the Holy Spirit to stop and I did. They are other times when it’s okey because God loves us and it is natural that we want to show our love especially for our partner.
What an amazing video, I agree with you 110% - we decide if it is okay or if it is not according to our own boundaries and morals, my girlfriend and I started off as best friends - we got to know each other on a spiritual and emotional level before anything physical.
You are a true vessel of God. I've been watching your videos for a while now and its really amazing to see someone as young as your serving God so passionately. Thank you
Gerron Mason , possibly very good , but I’m concerned that a woman knows immediately if you are eligible for a partner . It’s possible that you may have been eligible immediately and just progressed slowly. It’s just not probable. Taking a man out of the friend zone is insincere of a woman , and if that’s the case she won’t respect you . I personally wouldn’t build my life with a woman on that situation.
while I didn't 100% agree with everything in Joshua Harris's book, it's still one of my favorites because I really got a lot out of it and the way he explained things really made sense. I don't think it's necessarily sinful to kiss before marriage, but I think it's really smart that you and your girlfriend held off for several months on doing that so you could better get to know each other first. and that's one of the things Josh talks about in the book. That getting physical right away can keep you from truly getting to know the real person you're dating because the physical side of the relationship becomes the focus and can even blind you to a lot of things. and that's just one of many things I found really smart and helpful in the book.
And I honestly don't know how long I'll wait on kissing. my wedding day, till we're engaged, or just till we've been dating for a while first.
Absolutely
i think kissing is a huge part of a relationship and also a huge indicator of compatibility and can tell you a lot about a person and how you feel about them, whether consciously or subconsciously, and, at least for me, is something i really don't think i could do without.
that being said i feel like it's important to consider what kind of kissing and for what purpose. a full on hours long makeout session every minute you spend with someone desperately trying to hold back from sex but always failing and going a little further physically each time is really a bad idea and only ends with tons of regret and ruining what could have been good.. but i do feel like the terror and excitement of the "magical first kiss" is something every relationship should have and deserves to experience... it can't happen if its planned or forced or held back from, it should be allowed to bloom and come naturally in its own time just like the love you hope to have with that person.
I think saving the first kiss for marriage is absolutely romantic and very beautiful. It also is very pure. But it is very hard.
I guess the best thing is to go step by step a little bit further with the agreement of your partner.
yup
In my opinion
Kissing: yes
Making out: no
Point is, as long as you can control yourself and not be tempted sexually than I don’t see anything wrong with kissing.
Bro, could you make a video on how do Christians deal with tv shows? What to watch and how much to watch?
Thanks!
I'll see what I can do! Great suggestion
ThatChristianVlogger That would be nice! My mom forbids all TV and movies (even stuff like spongebob) because any distractions or anything that isn't related to further God's kingdom is evil. I think she has a point to some extent but it's gets really irrataing
Phiphi Cupcake how then are you on yt?😂
Degenerate Taco Shhh.... don't tell anyone I'm here 👀
Phiphi Cupcake ok I'm gonna tell you straight out your mom is dumb not every thing is a religious thing plus it's not teaching against your religion sooooo your mom needs to go into the real world news flash not everyone is Christan some people and gay get over
Until I was 18 I thought my first kiss would be on my wedding day but 2 points; that will mean you're being watched as you first try kissing someone and it's going to look terrible because it WILL Be terrible, I'd probably be to scared to even do it at all while people are there.
Second point- gestures like kissing, holding hands and just being connected with your partner in a loving, trusting and happy way is natural progression of most relationships.
I think that if you actually don't want to give that to someone after getting to know them, then you also don't want to stay with them long term. But I support those who want to stay pure as possible. Purity is a matter of what is in your heart however and you should be mindful when getting more comfortable with someone.
Absolutely!
Beka got horny
My fiance and I met on Christian Mingle, and emailed, chatted, then Skyped for several months before we met in person. So we had a good, long time to get to know each other, what our goals were, etc. before kissing.
We decided we did want to kiss before marriage (but definitely save our virginity for our wedding night). Neither of us wanted that beautiful, special first kiss to be turned into an awkward first performance in front of a live audience on our wedding day. We're glad we made that choice. :)
MissCrazyCatLady12
I met my husband on Christian Mingle too! Our chemistry was so electric that we nearly ended up making out on our first date! (We were both in our 30s when we met so we'd both dated before, which made waiting to kiss absolutely insane for us to do. Plus our primary love language is Touch.) The first guy I dated from the website was a few years younger than me and hadn't had his first kiss yet because his only previous gf was in the "first kiss on your wedding day" camp. I think I told him that I didn't want to wait til the wedding to kiss cause that's a super intimate special moment that's probably gonna be pretty awkward too. I did tell him that I wanted to kiss him but I wouldn't do so until he gave me permission first because anyone's first kiss is a special thing. (I had no qualms with asking him out and being direct like that about kissing.) So thanks for agreeing that kissing is special and not to be done casually but also not to be shared in front of your entire wedding party.
Your user name is great! I said for years before I met my husband that I would rather become a crazy cat lady than marry the wrong guy! God gave me a husband so now we can be crazy cat people together. :-)
AWWWWW!!!! His story about him and his wife is so inspiring
:D
ok, let's stop for a second and ask a question... WHY? Why would you want to kiss before marriage... WHY?
Because it is an innocent kind of affection.it's not inherently sexual, and for a lot of prior, it's not a big deal.
The Bible never even implies that kissing is a sin, so it's just a matter of conviction.
Some might be tempted by it, but a lot of Christians don't feel any temptation from kissing.
To me, kissing can be an important part of a relationship. Of course, the main priority should be getting to know each other on a non-physical level, but kissing is good too, for emotional bonding. It's just a way to show loving, caring affection (btw, I'm not talking about full-on making out lol, that can be very sexual).
Along with holding hands, and hugs, including long ones. Long hugs are scientifically shown to increase bonding and emotional intimacy between two people. And not all "intimacy" is sexual intimacy.
Emma S. You got it 😏
Are you a robot?
I really liked this video and have never really thought about this before. I think I will wait until marriage or maybe engagement for my first kiss even though it seems most of my friends have already kissed people and people make fun of me for it but I guess God's words are the only ones that matter.
Yeah, god's principles never change..you don't have to follow the status quo..keep it up
Abby Smith God never said you can't kiss before marriage lol
Hello 🤗
Define "kiss". If it's a peck on the cheek, or a little kiss on the mouth, then that's fine. But making out, no. That could lead to temptation.
What do you define as the difference between a Kiss and Making out?
Yes I agree with you! I also feel that its different for all couples :)
Amen :)
You Said the bible only condenms sexual activities before marriage, right? If I understand well, kissing is not a sexual act according to your thoughts. If it's not sexual , why do people only kiss people they're sexually attracted to?
But doesn't the bible say to greet one another with a holy kiss? ;) Just joking! I mean It really does say that but it's not about romantic relationships. ha! I really do think that it is a tricky thing and both man and woman have to agree on what is the best decision for their relationship to help keep the relationship holy. Holiness Has to be our aim above all else. So much easier said than done! But it is also why it is important for BOTH the guy and girl to have a personal and growing relationship with the Lord and striving for righteousness in his and her own lives!
Haha exactly! Truth... it's hard
Well said Lorie!
Thanks Coy!
yes, and that holiness and righteousness is looking to God for His will, constantly seeking Him and being open to and move in His leading. Accountability from others following God is golden.
Lorie Brumfield YES. This is(still another) reason why we should not date non-believers( 2nd Corinthians 6:14, et al).
Biblical dating doesn't honor God when we kiss each other, my girlfriend will be my sister till the day I marry her! (1 Timothy 5:1)
The bible say also to flee from all kind of ( formication or sexual immorality)
Is kissing a kind of sexual immorality ? It depends, if it was by mistake as what happened with you the good night kiss, this isn't a sin, but the lust kiss is a sin, but for me I try to hold my kissing until the day of marriage!
We all fall no body is perfect except Jesus, but we walk by spirit and listen to Holy Spirit inside us!
Amen :)
100%
here's a story: I didn't want to date anybody, and the girl I'm dating didn't really want to date anybody; we both wanted to avoid complications. We both seeked out what was already amazing in our lives... then she started hanging out with my friends, and I have no clue how we even started dating lol; our friends didn't really know we were dating lol, but then I walked up to them with her on my back to surprise them. they were actually trying to get her to date a different guy, and even though we both didn't want to date, somehow we were brought together. She said it would be romantic if our first kiss was in the rain. The day it rained... idk what happened, but we have no clue who kissed who because we both didn't have the intention to kiss. The kiss just happened to happen... idk how. We were even looking away from eachother when we went to kiss..... I am still clueless to how this happened........this was all before I was Christian; I was actually Buddhist before, and she was Christian. I switched over to Christianity eventually, and she said when she was younger that she prayed to marry a christian man... and somehow I became christian.... miracles...
lovely
The fact that "touch" is so critical in the chapter of Acts should convict people for thinking kissing is okay. If you disagree your looking at marriage with wisdom of the world and not the wisdom of God. You ought to decide if a man or woman is meant to be your husband or wife by walking in the Spirit and learning to tune your ear to his gentle voice, not physicality. If you "feel" your being tempted then you MUST spend time with Him and know your identity and completeness in Christ. We think we are super slaves to sin when we have a Spirit that is Holly and gives us self discipline.
I think it's ok, but applying temperance in all things is important
for sure!
I love this. You approached it without making anyone feel guilty. Not that the other videos on this purposefully make people feel guilty, but I feel other Christian videos on this can give off such a judgmental vibe, but not the case in yours... thank you!!
I agree with you man my relationship with my gf who's a Christian too we did what you did with your current gf we got to know each other like reeeeallllllyyy know each other and talk deep stuff and Christian vaules we finally came to the conclusion around the 10th month of us dating ( it's 1 1/2 years rn and will propose this summer :)) that we can kiss and honor God with it and we can deepen our love for each other in another way
Thank you sooooo much for talking on this subject. I have been praying and thinking about this topic specifically for a long long time. I didn’t live my life for Christ for many years and only recently rededicated myself to God as an adult. Since doing so, dating has obviously completely changed for me and it has been very difficult to go from where I was, to reestablishing healthy boundaries in a relationship now. I’m thankfully in an amazing relationship with a very Godly man and I’m so happy with him! He truly is the best man I have ever met.
We’ve been together 4 months now, but it has been difficult because I wasn’t sure where exactly the line should be drawn physically and both of us really want to honor God both spiritually and physically.
I also read the book by Joshua Harris in my younger years, and it also made me have a toxic view on relationships at that time, and just a very unrealistic view of a godly relationship in general. Even though I later didn’t agree with his book, I didn’t want to just throw out everything either. At this time, I’ve actually come to the same conclusion you did in this video and my bf did as well. We did talk about it and it has definitely kept our relationship very healthy with each other and we constantly strive to encourage each other to continue becoming closer with God.
One thing that I really admire and love that my boyfriend did (which never occurred in my worldly relationships) was that when we went too far, he apologized and asked if we could pray to ask God to forgive us for winning against him and ask him to help us honor him. I was so amazed and honestly shocked with this concept because he wasn’t condemning me for leading him on, or condemning himself. He simply owned up to his actions and gave me the option to own up to mine and ask God to forgive us and move forward. This really encouraged me and made me desire all the more to do right not only by God but to myself and him.
People are bound to make mistakes but as my father once said, God doesn’t waist anything, not even our mistakes. God knows our hearts and he know when we are really trying, but when we do fall short (and don’t used our downfall as an excuse to continue on sinning) then God can use it to help us grow and even expand his grace on us. No, we shouldn’t take advantage of Gods grace, but I think it’s essential that we don’t have a toxic relationship with ourselves and ignore the grace that God does give when we fall short.
I don’t believe kissing and cuddling is against what God has planned before marriage, but I do agree that sex before marriage and or oral is not appropriate because that is having sexual intimacy which i believe should be reserved for marriage. But, like you stated in this video, I too believe it depends on where a person is at and what a person can handle. Ultimately, it’s something that a couple should not only talk about but pray about, and ask God for guidance on.
And by no means am I saying I have this completely figured out but that is also what lead me to this video is because I really want to know more on this subject and what God actually says about it. So, thank you again for sharing on this subject. I’m very grateful!
This is pretty much exactly what I needed to hear. I was never sure whether it was ok , and I wanted to wait. At least for a while. I wanted to keep God at the center of the relationship, and it was hard to explain to my, then, boyfriend. I am glad that I know about this now.
Awesome! Hopefully you guys can come to an agreement and honor each other and God in that :) Let me know how it goes!
I think it just depends on you and your boyfriend or girlfriend. If you and them can both kiss without taking it farther, I think it's ok. However, we are told not to be a stumbling block in Romans, so if you or the person you're in a relationship struggle with wanting to go further, then I think it's best to save it for marriage.
Thanks very much for this inspiring video. I've already kissed but it wasn't of my fault cuz it surprised me. I told myself that i'll have my first kiss before the altar, but he broke it. This matter of communication is true and that's what we keep doing. We pray for each other and ask God to approve and lead us through. God Bless You!!
Kissing before marriage depends on the couple. Communicating about boundaries at the beginning of the relationship is wise and such a great start to a any relationship. You can tell your spiritual mentors (maybe a spiritual couple) about your boundaries so that they can hold you accountable. Spiritual couples can be a huge help as they might have more experience and wisdom in helping you have healthy relationship.
If I ever get into relationship, I would wait for kissing until both of us confirmed that we love each other and are planning to become more than just a gf and bf. I personally think, especially with girls, we tend to gain more "emotions" when we kiss, have sex, and sometimes even just by hugs, lol. Sex and kissing make dating relationships chaotic because we love how the person kisses or the sex with that person, but we confuse that with loving that person. This is just an observation, lol.
I personally believe that we should go into dating with the intention of marrying that person. As well, that just means the individual with this mindset should seriously consider who they date. People we date who might have lots of “baggage “ might lead a pure Christian into sin and a ton of heartache. Gotta find that Proverbs’ 31 women or someone like 80 percent close to it. What do ya say?🤗
Sciences revealed there hormons of attraction in saliva and that they make people remain fond of their partners regardless the degree of sincerity. it is up to you play with the fire but telling others that they should do the same is what I find a bit dangerous.
Excellent point. Even for himself because he will be accountable for mis guiding people with falsehoods.
@@kem6429 exactly
Waiting to kiss until the day of marriage sounds scary ! I'd just be like "Man, Oh Man, what if there's no spark !!" haha !
Great video man this was super awesome and informative !
Haha, that would be super hard and scary! Thanks for the support bro!
I don't agree with sex before marriage, but kissing?! I think it's fine. It's not very sexual.
thanks for sharing!
If you add "very", then there is a second thought to your comment and that's a highlight that there is something wrong about kissing.
Gloria Mutoni so true! 👏👏
Taylor I know people get so extreme
Gloria Mutoni you were created a sexual being before marriage, even before having sex. Is that a sin? No. Quit being extreme.
Really practical advice that was, first and foremost, biblically inspired by desiring to honor the Lord! My wife and I had to stop kissing up to our marriage because it was causing me problems. So, I think it's important to understand that you can always put the brakes on. BUT, once tasted, the fruit can only be spat out, not untasted.
Kissing is acting on a lustful desire (before marriage). Jesus tells us that whosoever even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery in his heart. This is not rocket science guys :)
If you can kiss a gf/bf without it coming from lust, then you're the exception and thats fine.
Yup
Rise On Fire very true, if I kiss my girlfriend and didn't feel anything, it means I have no feeling or else I am gay
Rise On Fire Oh myyyy. Thank you! This actually cleared my confusion up lol. It doesn't say in the bible you cannot kiss. Kissing is not necessarily sexual. In the old testament Jacob greeted Rachel with a kiss. It really depends if you are doing it in a lustful way or an affectionate way.
@Rise on Fire, kissing isn't a lustful desire. If you kiss someone on the cheek or kiss someone on the mouth briefly, that isn't lust. Stop spreading false fear.
We all know what kind of kissing I was talking about when I connect it with lust :)
I've watched a lot of videos like this and, although I see things somewhat differently to you, I LOVE the way that you spoke about this topic! A lot of people speak as if theirs is the only way to interpret God's word, and I love your openness for discussion alongside your conviction. Thank you!
I'm 14 and throught the debating in the Internet I've grown confused and frustrated. I decide to give up on dating. I will be single for life.
You know, periods of singleness is alright!
same I'm 16 and just lost interest in dating...
Hey, God can give u one lady or one guy that u ll love and never need to date anymore, God is good, u can trust Him
Oscar Guzman i am 17 and i had in my 15 a catastrophic relationship and then i decided I'll stay single now i found a guy who cares for me and loves me soo future always keeps surprises!
Oscar Guzman Hi, in Islam religion, we do have a set of specific rules on what to do and what not to do in life. Because God knows about human temptations, etc. Rather than figuring out what God ask us to obey, I believe Alquran (Islam book) has everything especially this kind of thing. A lot of debate in Christian about if kissing allowable before marriage or not, how women should dress to please God and other moral values are discussed in Islam in details. May God bless you and all other Christians. Peace.
On point Sir.
Sex before marriage is explicitly spoken of and it's clear in the bible but the Bible doesn't say anything regarding holding hands, kiss and stuff like that, the Bible tho talks about lust and sexual immorality, so it all comes down to be a personal issue, if you personally know for sure that kissing or holding of hands would bring to your mind lustful and impure thoughts leading to somewhere else then *stop* its just simple as that, if your spirit is not feeling OK, just tell your partner and make that a boundary, it's not about what *someone* says its right or wrong....
It's about your walk with God and how you know and identify how something is damaging to your spiritual growth, especially when that thing is not explicitly spoken of in the bible. My opinion
The Bible only says no sex before marriage but not about anything else though
Lizzy Bruins he said that
ya so its ok to kiss right
Lizzy Bruins yes :)
Lizzy Bruins
You have to be Careful because kissing can lead you to have sex , sorry englisch isn't my mother tongue
Don't give your mother tongue ,that is a sin
I don't think there's anything wrong with kissing before marriage. I honestly don't see how you can choose to marry someone if you don't have some sort of physical relationship.
Same. The idea is insanity
6:57 totally true, from my experience, relationships tend to go better when the two get to know each other as friends first.
Yes it's called DATING WITH A PURPOSE. In terms of kissing, I don't find an issue with kissing. But I can see why it could be recommended not to, because of the temptation it causes.
If they have a sexual eye or sexual thoughts. Ur already in adultery. Kissing can lead to lustful thoughts
Mia Marquez wowww if your out of high school and safe kissing can lead to sex wow so bad it's not that hard if you wanna wait till marriage wait if you don't don't
Extreme.
but without extended hugging kissing and even sex that's just a really good friendship actually extended cuddling doesn't my best friends are constantly hugging each other
What a ridiculous question. Then you shouldn't even look at each other or touch?
+Brick Tin might be ridiculous, but it's a real question to some
ThatChristianVlogger Yeah, I guess. In my country (Croatia) we do have different customs so that might be it.
+Brick Tin yeah, definitely a cultural difference
I have hugged girls outside of my family, even ones I like somewhat, and it was never out of lust.
Brick Tin right lol
In my personal opinion I don't think kissing before marrige could be considered wrong necessarily, however I do believe that if you begin going further than a kiss it would be considered as wrong. But for kissing I wouldn't worry. :)
Wow, I thought it was just me. I also think dating these days just leads people down paths they shouldn't go.
I was interested in possibly dating this guy, and I found out he was interested in the possibility also. I remember just talking with him about our boundaries, and it made us respect each other so much! He had began just tickling me, little things like that, but I heard the conviction to just postpone that sort of thing, and discuss our physical boundaries as Chrisitians. glad we did, b.c. we ended up deciding not to date, and in the end we both kept our relationship with God as a focus! ♡
Wow! Kudos. I think it's awesome that you guys were able to honor God in that process
I think I'm the Bible it only says no sex before marriage but kissing and such can lead to it but I don't think it matters I just think you need to be able to hold yourself from having sex
Biblically sex means vaginal sex. Flesh of Flesh.
Kissing is not a wise thing to do at all before marriage.. I cannot explain it much but a born again believer will understand what I mean.
8:08 there's the answer your looking for
I am only 62 years old so not new to Christianity but also have not dated for over 40 years. Juanita and I married in Dec, 1976. It seem that I remember one of the guild lines that was set down by our leaders back then was always double or triple date with other Christian couples. Helps to act as a moral compass when in a new relationship. Hope that helps.
I want my first kiss to be on the Altar😍😁hahaha.
+Kadibong Kadimei haha respect! ✊🏼
Hopefully you are not disappointed with the skill of the one you marry. It's like playing a lottery lol
Yes!
Kissing is foreplay to sex. Period. You cannot french kiss without being tempted to go further. In fact, french kissing is usually the first thing married people do when it is there time to be intimate with one another. It is like adding the oil to the pan and heating prior to cooking. Almost all sexual activity both good and bad starts with lips touching. Holding hands is also a bit of foreplay sexually, too, as is footsie. Putting your arm around your girlfriend is ok and much better and safer. It is intimate enough to say you are dating or courting and it is not flesh on flesh. Just avoid touching and massaging and playing with hair. That is only foreplay happening without you realizing it. Just having your arm on the back of the seat behind her head is plenty for her to know she is safe and with you. And if you can contain yourself enough to just kiss on the cheek to show your affection pre-marriage, that would be better. Also watch what clothing you are wearing on your "dates" because the way you dress can also be a hindrance to you and your girlfriend behaving. No outfits that show a lot of leg and cleavage, girls. No outfits that show more skin than clothes. And guys, go easy on the cologne and gum and stuff. You don't want to say with your appearance, I am clean and smelling good and have my mouth ready for kissing. You want to have clean breath but not make it seem like you are chewing gum because kissing is going to happen later. Same with the cologne. Just smell clean. Don't smell seductive.
I love your channel..
Hold on to this faith brother
My boyfriend and I started talking about this stuff first. But we soon came to realize that kissing was a hard one to set because when it's out of love it feels fine but when it may be out of lust for those feelings it's not. Personaly why I watched this video is because I don't want it to be out of lust but only out of love and it's hard to walk that line. We pulled back our boundries but idk what the best thing to do is.
Gonna save my lips for marriage :)
Keep it up..same here
I am a Christian and I am kissing my woman whenever and wherever because SHE IS MY WOMAN and because I love, desire and want her. Period!
Yes. That is Sexual Morality ( & Intimacy). These people dont know what theyre talking about. How can one be close without any affection?
my main question is my gf isn't a christian but she knows i am and respects my ideals. but i also want to start introducing her into Christianity but how do i do that without making it uncomfortable or make is seem like im forcing it cause i know that unless they accept jesus on their own accord it means nothing
+samm sosa honestly that's a super hard question. I'm not sure I have the right answer. I'd personally not feel comfortable dating someone without similar life and faith values
ThatChristianVlogger i understand but i feel as though i should be trying to bring people into christ. Like paul said if we stayed away from all none christians then we'd have to stay way from everyone
+samm sosa that's true and I would encourage you to be a witness. However, in my experience, this is much more dangerous in romantic relationships. More often than not, the non Christian influences the Christian more than the other way around
ThatChristianVlogger yea you're right about that but i think that only happens when the christian that doesn't have a firm stance in the lord which is why i think god waited this long to bring her to me. Plus like i said i told her from the get go that i was a christian and she knows my ideals and even though she isn't chritian some of those ideals fall in line with mine. Like the no sex before marriage.
ThatChristianVlogger you are spot on in my opinion and we should sacrifice as Christians but not sacrifice our souls for the flesh of others, it can be risky. As a person that dated a person who I thought “I could bring to Christ” was only a delay to the person that was ready to receive Christ before the relationship even started.
I need to let you know that you are such a beautiful person. I feel in my heart that you have so much love for people, and I think that is clear through the work that you do and the rewards you give on patreon. I hope to soon be in a more financially stable place and I will then definitely support your work! God's blessing for you, your family and your work!
Aww that's so kind Eline! Thanks so much :)
We're did you get that shirt that's cool
I made it! I'm going to be selling them pretty soon through a website. Still in progress though
ThatChristianVlogger Waiting..! 👍
The shirts are ready!
I'm really enjoying your videos! Your perspective is honest, fresh, and realistic. I also love how you are open to opposing views and don't condemn others with different opinions. We need more of this from young Christians!
+Maura Hilgar :) thanks!
The best way to know somebody is talking, not touching. When you start dating & touching you always end up with sexual fantasies. The sexual fantasies will boost your flesh and soul with thousands of emotions and feelings for having sex.
Very interesting! I really like hearing your perspective. Personally I think that physical attraction is important in a relationship so I do believe in kissing before marriage for sure. I think that physical and emotional attraction will go hand in hand. However I understand that it is different for everyone? No individual or couple is the same.
I would definitely agree! Physical attraction is a must!
No, because you never know if you are going to marrie that person until it actually happens so if you break up that's being unpure to your future bride/husband
Its Cole agreed
wow finally someone with a proper/balanced view of dating. I agree with this 100%
Loved the video. I've struggling with this for the past year or so and I know not to take your word as law but it's nice to have another unbiased christian's perspective.
Glad it's helpful! :)
Whats the point of dating if youre not even kissing. But hey, everyone has an opinion..do whatever makes you happy dude